Ephesians 4:30 - Don't Hear What I'm Not Saying

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Thank you, James.

I hope you all enjoyed that song.

You'll have a chance to sing it yourselves after the sermon.

So, we look forward to that.

I hope you all had a wonderful 4th of July.

Maybe you got as crazy as we did.

The cops ended up at my house at the house at the house at the house at the house at

the house at the house at the house at the house at the house at the house at the house

We did.

The cops ended up at my house last night.

Just kidding, they were next door, actually.

I think our neighbors, they waited until all the rain stopped at about 1230 to shoot off

all their fireworks.

And so, there was a sleeping preacher who was woken up.

So, I hope that your night went better than mine did last night.

I'm excited to open God's Word with you.

If you will look at Ephesians chapter 4, we'll be considering verses 25 through 32 this morning.

Ephesians 4 · chapter mention

Ephesians 4, 25 through 32.

As you turn there, let me tell you, this is our last week in chapter 4 of Ephesians.

You may recall that Will spent the past two weeks talking about verses 17 through 32,

and the summary was this.

There was the old way, there is the new way, and we have all of these gospel kingdom-minded

motivations.

Paul says, because of how the gospel has changed your life, you now put on the new self, and

you now respond.

You take up the calling in which you have been called.

As we conclude this section, Will and I thought it would be helpful to spend a week talking

particularly about verse 30, as it talks about grieving the Holy Spirit.

I was the one lucky enough to get the verse on grieving the Holy Spirit.

I really am excited, though, and look forward to sharing God's Word with you as we will focus

on verse 30.

The Holy Spirit's not something that we talk about very often.

We don't talk about it very often.

One, because there aren't many verses on the Holy Spirit, and two, the ones that are there

are often difficult passages like this one.

So I want to talk about our passage, but I also want to speak big picture about the Holy

Spirit this morning as well.

So look with me at Ephesians chapter 4.

Ephesians 4 · chapter mention

We'll go back and start in verse 25 and go through verse 32.

Look at God's Word with me.

Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for

we are members one of another.

Be angry and do not sin.

Do not let the sun go down on your anger and give no opportunity to the devil.

Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor, doing honest work with his own

hands so that he may have something to share with anyone in need.

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up,

as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.

Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along

with all malice.

Will you pray with me?

Father, you tell us that the flowers fade, but your Word stands forever.

And so, Father, we claim that promise this morning, that as we consider your Word this

morning, that it might not fade, that it might carry with great power into our hearts and

our lives.

And Father, as we even consider the Holy Spirit, would you offer us your Holy Spirit this morning?

That your Holy Spirit would be a teacher, that your Holy Spirit would be a guide to us as

we consider this book, the book of Ephesians, the promises of Paul.

So be with us now, Father.

Guide us and keep us during this time.

Pray these things in your heavenly Son's name.

Amen.

Amen.

One of my professors in seminary was memorable for saying lots of things.

There were lots of things that Jack Collins was known for saying.

The class where he was most famous for saying famous things was Covenant Theology.

It was the introductory course that all first-year students at Covenant Seminary take.

And it was the class where the professors, it was four of them, they taught it together.

And they took these entering students who were on top of the spiritual world.

They thought they had it all figured out.

And they put their theological world totally out of balance.

They took everything that you thought you knew, and they pointed out your presuppositions.

They pointed out your weaknesses.

And they ultimately pointed out all the things that you didn't know.

They were there to knock you down a notch.

One of the things that Jack Collins was famous for saying was,

Don't hear what I'm not saying.

Don't hear what I'm not saying.

I think it originated from his impatience.

I think it came out of some of his disgust from students who would take giant leaps from

one thing he said about a particular passage and draw all kinds of other conclusions.

Don't hear what I'm not saying was the warning from Jack Collins all the time.

It was a reminder to us to stay focused, to remember what we knew to be true about the

subject at hand.

Don't start drawing all kinds of crazy conclusions.

Don't hear what I'm not saying.

Dr. Collins knew from working with young seminarians that it was the habit of our eager hearts and

minds to want to believe things that weren't actually in the text, that weren't actually there.

And if I may, I believe that Paul would probably be saying the same thing to us this morning

as we consider verse 32 about the Holy Spirit.

Don't hear what I'm not saying would be the warning of Paul.

He says,

Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption, but

stop.

Do not hear what I'm not saying.

As we consider the passage this morning, we understand that there's a lot that the Bible

teaches about the Holy Spirit, and we must be careful to not hear what the passage isn't

saying.

Sayings like these, that we grieve the Spirit, that we affect the Holy Spirit, can lead us

to hear things that are not in the text.

So I want us just to slow down a little bit, and I want us to start there.

Let's start there by talking about what this passage doesn't say.

So if you want to start taking notes, start there.

Here's what the passage doesn't say.

What this passage doesn't say about the Holy Spirit.

The first is this.

The passage does not say that grieving and blaspheming are the same.

If you're like me, you hear this passage, you read about the grieving of the Holy Spirit,

and your mind immediately goes to Jesus' words about blaspheming the Spirit.

And you start to get confused, and you think, oh no, I don't want to…

Paul's saying don't blaspheme the Spirit.

That's what he's saying.

I don't want to get caught up in this, what did Jesus call it?

Blaspheming was the unforgivable sin, right?

Look with me at Mark chapter 3.

Mark 3 · chapter mention

These are Jesus' words.

He says this,

In Mark chapter 3, Jesus is speaking about a much different act towards the Holy Spirit

Mark 3 · chapter mention

than the grieving that Paul is talking about here.

We're not going to consider Mark chapter 3 entirely this morning.

Mark 3 · chapter mention

I'm not going to do it justice.

But you need to know that what Jesus was referring to here was a flagrant, willful, decisive judgment

that the Spirit's testimony came from Satan.

That the Spirit's testimony was untrue.

Jesus is explaining that all those who have this persistent, unrepentant denial of the Holy Spirit

will not experience forgiveness.

The word that Jesus uses for blaspheming is entirely different.

It has a different context.

It was spoken by a different person.

It comes from a different biblical author,

and therefore it has a much different meaning than what Paul is talking about here in chapter 4.

It's also worth noting that many Christians fear from Mark chapter 3 that they themselves might blaspheme the Spirit.

Mark 3 · chapter mention

This concern, this consideration actually shows a sensitivity to the Spirit,

and it's evidence that you're not blaspheming the Spirit.

So if that's in the back of your mind somewhere, please know that.

Please know that if you're sensitive to blaspheming the Spirit,

you're not actually blaspheming the Spirit.

You have good judgment.

You're considering your own heart.

Paul's word choice, though, his word choice in Ephesians chapter 4 verse 30

Ephesians 4:30

is one that means to be made sad, to be made sorrowful,

to affect with grief or to make one uneasy.

This definition, along with Paul's whole context, makes these very different ideas.

Grieving is not blaspheming.

Grieving is not blaspheming.

As we grieve the Spirit, which Paul knows that we will,

he anticipates it by talking about it,

we are doing something very different than what Jesus spoke about in Mark chapter 3.

Mark 3 · chapter mention

Paul is not saying that grieving is blaspheming.

The second thing that Paul is not saying is that we can affect our relationship with the Father.

He's not saying that we can affect our relationship with the Father.

We're going to talk a little bit more in a moment about our actions,

both of our head and our hearts that grieve the Spirit,

but we must first remove from our minds any idea that we can change or affect the standing that we have with the Father.

Paul is not saying that we can affect our relationship with the Father.

This is true for a number of reasons.

The first is that the entire book of Ephesians so far doesn't support that idea.

The entire book of Ephesians so far is founded upon, rooted in,

the fact that we have received God's grace through Christ,

and that we are eternally sealed by that.

As Paul talks about us grieving the Spirit,

it's not in contradiction to what he's talked about already about grace.

Paul knows that we are sealed by the Father.

We are forever sons and daughters,

and there's nothing that we can do to change that relationship.

There's also a biblical precedent for grieving the Holy Spirit.

Paul had in mind Isaiah 63.

It was in clear view when he wrote this passage,

and in Isaiah 63, the people of God are described the exact same way,

as grieving the Holy Spirit.

They've grieved the Holy Spirit through their disobedience.

It was this common pattern of God's people to return to their sin again and again, right?

And the Scripture tells us that God was saddened,

that He was sorrowful,

that He grieved when the people of God returned to their sin.

We can't miss the clear indication and the significance of the fact that our sins do affect the Father,

but they do not affect our relationship with the Father.

This description of rebelling against God in Isaiah is couched, however,

you need to understand, between two declarations of God's love.

It's couched by two declarations of God's love.

Look with me at Isaiah 63, beginning in verse 7.

It says this,

I will recount the steadfast love of the Lord,

the praises of the Lord according to all that the Lord has granted us,

and the great goodness to the house of Israel,

according to the abundance of His steadfast love.

For He said,

Surely they are My people,

children who will not deal falsely.

And He became their Savior.

In all their affliction, He was afflicted,

and the angel of His presence saved them in His love,

and in His pity, He redeemed them.

He lifted them up and carried them all the days of old.

God's love is offered again and again and again.

His spirit grieves, but then listen to what comes next.

In verse 11,

Then He remembered the days of old, of Moses and His people.

Where is He who brought them up out of the sea with the shepherds of His flock?

Where is He who put in the midst of them His Holy Spirit,

who caused His glorious arm to go at the right hand of Moses,

who divided the waters before them to make for Himself an everlasting name?

The proclamation is there.

The message is clear.

God's love never stops pursuing you.

Even in His grief,

there's nothing that will change your relationship with the Father.

Just as God does not want us to walk in sin,

He also does not want us to ever forget His love and His redemption.

Many can perceive these accounts from the Old Testament,

even Ephesians chapter 4,

Ephesians 4 · chapter mention

read them on their own,

and consider God as having this overriding sentiment

of looking over your shoulder with shame.

He looks over your shoulder, shaking His head.

He can't believe what you've done.

No.

The Father stands in front of you,

and He smiles,

and He says,

You are my son,

and you are my daughter.

I grieve your sin,

but it does not change your standing with me.

The reality of God's grievance

cannot be separated from the truth of His unconditional love.

The prophet Isaiah did not lose sight of it.

The apostle Paul did not lose sight of it.

We cannot lose sight of the unchanging love that God has for us.

Don't hear Paul saying that we can affect our relationship with the Father.

The third thing that we don't need to hear,

that we can't hear in this passage,

is that human emotion is equivalent to divine emotion.

That human emotion is equivalent to divine emotion.

What I mean when I say that is this.

We must be able to separate our own understanding of an emotion as expressed

between sinful human beings

and how it's expressed from a holy and perfect God.

Something similar to this would be our understanding from the Bible of God's jealousy,

of His wrath,

of His anger.

It's difficult for us to imagine a holy expression of those emotions

when we so often only understand an expression of those emotions

as it's affected by the fall, right?

For many of us,

our experience of our wrongdoing,

when we've sinned,

when we disobeyed,

with our heavenly parents,

it was reflected in a removal of affection.

Maybe there was shame.

Maybe there was abuse when you got out of line.

Maybe your identity became your sin in that moment.

Or perhaps,

although you had very loving,

very well-intentioned parents,

you still struggled all through your childhood,

and even today,

to separate your behavior

from the verdict of what Jesus says about you.

In our sinful state,

and in our broken world,

we often create a version of God

that's flawed and incorrect.

Blaise Pascal said that

God created man in His own image,

and man returned the favor.

We must not create a version of God

whose expression of emotions

directly mirrors ours

as ours are flawed and imperfect.

The grievance of God

doesn't always look like the grievance of man.

The grievance of God is perfect,

it's holy,

it's pure.

Its motives are without flaw,

and its intentions are always good,

and right.

And so Paul does not want us

to hear him saying

that human emotions

are directly reflected

in divine emotions.

If these are the things,

then, that Paul doesn't want us

to hear him saying,

what do we hear him saying?

What is actually true?

How do we then respond?

You want to know,

okay, Chad, I got it.

How do I not grieve the Spirit?

How do I respond

to the Spirit appropriately?

Here's what you do.

The first,

Paul wants you to understand

that your actions

do impact God's Spirit.

That's the truth.

Your actions

do impact God's Spirit.

The actions of your heart,

of your mind,

of your hands

do indeed

impact God's Spirit.

But this is challenging

for us, right?

It's challenging for us

because it's hard

for us to imagine

that something

that we would do

would affect

God's heart, right?

It feels almost

contradictory for us

to think about

the Holy Spirit,

the Holy Spirit

who seals us

in redemption,

Paul tells us,

who binds us together

in love,

who gives us

a new birth,

who we dwell

in intimacy with,

that that same Spirit

we could cause

to grieve,

that we could cause

that same Spirit

to be sad.

Paul confirms for us

that this is indeed

true,

that our actions

do matter.

But let's consider it

in the analogy

of a parent

and a child.

Think of your own

children.

Think about when

your children sin

or when they disobey.

When they depart

from the way

in which you have

called them to walk in,

how do your hearts respond?

Your hearts are grieved,

right?

You're saddened.

When my daughter

sinfully acts

out towards her brother,

towards her mother,

towards her friends,

I'm saddened

that her heart

has led her

to these actions.

But does that sin

change the way

that I feel

about my daughter?

Absolutely not.

Do I love her less

because she has sinned?

Absolutely not.

But am I grieved

over the fact

that she's a sinner,

that she still sins?

Yes, I am.

These things are not

in contradiction

with each other.

They can actually

live together,

that God can grieve

our sin,

but still never

stop loving us.

This is the correct view

of the divine emotion

that we should consider

from Ephesians.

Just as we never

stop loving our children

in their sin,

even more so,

the Father never,

ever stops loving us,

even as He has grieved

over our sin.

Can you imagine

a father who didn't care

if we sinned?

Can you imagine

if He was so checked out

from our relationship

that our sins

didn't matter to Him?

Actually,

His grievance,

His saddening

over our sin

is an expression

of His love, right?

It's because He cares.

He wants us to walk

as followers of Him.

That's what Paul's

reminding us of.

Our hands and our hearts

produce sin

in such a way

that God is affected

with sadness.

it's affected

because His children,

His children

are not walking

in the way

in which He has called them.

But what's also encouraging

southward

is that the opposite

is true.

That when we do walk

in obedience,

the Spirit is encouraged.

When we walk

in obedience,

the Spirit is encouraged

and lifted up.

God's kingdom

moves forward

as we honor

and obey the Spirit.

So the opposite

is also true.

Just as we can grieve

the Spirit with our sin,

we can lift the Spirit up

in our obedience.

This begs the question then,

what does it look like

to obey?

Specifically from this passage then,

what does it look like

to obey?

There's lots of speculation

about whether Paul

intended for this

to be a standalone statement,

whether Paul intended

for this to be tied

with the rest of the verses.

I'm actually going to go

both ways.

I'm going to say yes.

All right?

So Paul had some things

to say that particularly

applied to this passage,

and it was these things.

That God desires

our obedience

as we are sensitive

to truthfulness

and integrity.

That God desires

obedience to the Spirit

as we respond

to each other

appropriately

in our anger.

God cares about us

doing honest work.

God cares about us

being sensitive

to wholesome talk

coming from our mouths.

God is sensitive

to our hearts

being ruled

by love

and gentleness.

He's sensitive

that all malice,

all slander,

all wrath,

all bitterness

be put away.

So the verses

that are surrounding

this passage

all apply.

Those are ways

to lift up

and encourage the Spirit.

But if we look

at the bigger picture

of Paul's message

in Ephesians,

what has he been telling us

about over and over again?

Unity.

That one of the greatest ways

that you honor the Spirit,

that you lift up the Spirit,

is in your unity.

Paul's warning

is that as we

walk in the way

of our old self,

as we indulge

in our sin,

particularly those

of deception,

theft,

but especially those

that disrupt our unity,

when we do those things,

we are grieving

the Spirit.

One commentator explains

that everything

that is incompatible

with the purity

and the unity

of the church

is incompatible

with the Spirit's

own nature.

Incompatible

with the Spirit's

own nature.

And so because of that,

it's going to naturally

sadden the Spirit

when we don't have unity.

Sins which disrupt

the communal life,

which disrupt

our connection

as the body of Christ,

are in opposition

to the work

of the Spirit.

Because when we are unified,

God's kingdom

can move forward.

When we are unified

as the church,

God's kingdom

moves forward.

The final thing

that we will consider

about the Spirit,

what Paul does tell us

about the Spirit

is this,

and don't miss this.

When we respond

in obedience,

when we honor

the Spirit in obedience,

we do so

as saved

and redeemed people.

When we respond

to the Spirit,

we do so as saved

and redeemed people.

The second clause

of this verse

cannot be separated

from the first clause.

That as we grieve

the Spirit in our disobedience,

the second clause

reminds us of what?

That we were sealed

for the day of redemption.

Paul's creating

two big markers in time,

and he's saying

when you were sealed,

when you were saved,

when you came to

a saving knowledge

of Christ,

the payment for your sin

was forever paid,

and you are now

sealed for heaven.

But then he says

there's also coming

a day of redemption

where your bodies

will receive final redemption

and consummation.

So Paul's establishing

a marker in time

when you were saved,

and then he's establishing

a marker in time

when full consummation,

redemption will happen.

And he says

you live in between

those two markers.

That as you grieve

the Spirit,

you live in between

those two markers,

but don't forget

those two markers.

Don't forget

that as you obey,

you do so as people

who were saved

and people who

were being redeemed.

As we're challenged

not to grieve

the Spirit,

we are reminded

that we live

as people

who are already saved,

beloved,

and who are promised

full redemption.

Southwood,

we cannot miss

the importance

of the gospel

as we consider

how sin

impacts God's Spirit.

To better understand

this message

of God's love,

I want you to hear

from a friend of mine.

He's not actually

a friend.

I wish he was my friend,

and you'll find out

in a minute.

His name is

Brennan Manning.

He's written

a whole host of books.

I would recommend

every book

that he's written.

The video that you're

going to see

was a sermon

that he gave,

and it's not in HD.

The sound quality

is not great,

but that's part of

what I love about it.

It's an unpolished message

about the gospel of grace,

and he says it far better

than I ever will,

so I'd like for you

to hear it from him.

Y'all watch with me.

If you'd like to benefit

most from the worship

this morning,

I would suggest

that from this moment

until you put your head

in the pillow tonight,

you know that the focus

of your inner life

rests on one truth,

the staggering,

mind-blowing truth

that God loves you

just as you are

and not as you should be

because nobody in this building

is as they should be.

That God loves you,

not the person next to you,

not that God loves

Billy Graham,

Mother Teresa,

not that God loves

the church,

the world,

not that God loves

in some vague way

the whole human race,

but the truth

that God loves you

in such a way

that he'd rather die

than be without you.

Isn't it difficult

to believe you're worth

the death of anyone?

Least of all,

the all-holy God.

This moment,

do you truly believe

that God loves you

unconditionally

as you are

and not as you should be?

Do you?

You know,

I've never asked a Christian

in 20 years,

do you believe God loves you?

He's not replied,

oh yeah, yeah.

I've known that quite a while.

In fact,

I've known that since childhood.

And watch the way they live.

Lives of anxiety,

fear,

shame,

guilt,

low self-esteem,

remorse,

self-condemnation,

and self-hatred.

Oh,

they believe that God

loves you in some vague,

distant, abstract way,

but they'd be hard-pressed

to say that right now

the essence

of their Christian life

is a love affair,

and not just a simple

love affair,

but what G.K.

justin' called

a furious

love affair

going on

between Christ themselves

at this very moment.

Do you honestly believe

that with all the wrong turns

you made in your past,

the mistakes,

the detours,

the moments of sin,

selfishness,

dishonesty,

and degraded love,

that God has used them all

to bring them

where you are right now,

and the word says

you are standing

on holy ground?

This moment,

do you honestly believe

that God loves you

beyond worthiness

and unworthiness,

beyond fidelity

and infidelity,

that he loves you

in the morning sun

and the evening rain

without caution,

regret,

boundary,

limit,

breaking point,

no matter what's gone down,

he can't stop loving you.

If you don't fully trust that,

you're living a life

of illusion,

superstition,

cowardice,

you're projecting

onto Jesus

your own hateful feelings

toward yourself,

assuming he feels about you

the way you feel about you,

and thus you're worshipping

a God of human manufacturing,

a God who does not exist.

There is one God

of the Christian vision,

the God revealed

by and in Jesus Christ,

who this moment

walks directly to your seat,

looks you straight

in the eye,

and says,

I have a word for you.

I know your whole life story.

I know every skeleton

in your closet.

I know every moment

of sin,

shame,

dishonesty,

and degraded love

that has darkened

your past.

Right now,

I know your shallow faith,

your feeble prayer life,

your inconsistent discipleship.

Nothing is hidden

from my eyes,

and my word is this.

I dare you to trust

that I love you

as you are,

and not as you should be,

because you're never

going to be

as you should be.

Isn't that powerful?

this powerful truth?

At this moment,

do you truly believe

that God loves you

unconditionally?

At this moment,

do you believe

that God loves you

despite all your failure,

all your doubt,

all your wrongdoing,

all your lying,

your cheating,

your stealing,

your lust,

your degraded love,

your impure motives?

Do you believe

that God loves you

so much

that He can't

stop

pursuing you?

Do you believe

that Jesus

looks at you

and says,

I love you

as you are,

not as you should be,

because you're never

going to be

as you should be?

Brothers and sisters,

our text is telling us

that we live

in this place

where God loves us

just as we are,

not as we should be,

because until that day

of final redemption,

we're never going to be

as we should be.

We're going to continue

to live

as sinful beings

in a broken world,

but God loves you

as you are,

not as you should be.

There are lots of things

that my daughter

can do wrong.

There are plenty of sins

which her heart

is capable of.

She can lie,

she can cause me pain,

she can hurt others

with her words,

she can disrespect,

she can quickly grow

impatient and disobedient.

Each of these things

saddens and grieves me

as her father,

but you know

what grieves me the most?

What hurts my heart

the most

is when she forgets

how much I love her.

My heart is most broken

when my daughter

is led to believe

that her sin

will alter

how I feel about her

or that her sin

says something different

about who she is

besides being

my beloved child.

My heart is most broken

when she does not believe

that she is eternally loved.

This Southwood

is the thing

which I think grieves

the Holy Spirit

the most.

When we refuse

to believe

or we forget

that we are forgiven,

that we are sealed,

that we are covered

in Christ's blood

so that the all-holy God

will never leave us

nor forsake us.

Have you imagined

the gospel

to be so big,

to be so real

in your life

that God the Father

and Jesus Christ

would walk

into this room

right now

that he would sit down

beside you

and he would say,

do you know

how proud I am of you?

That he would walk up

to you and say,

you know what breaks

my heart

is when you refuse

to accept

that every sin

of your past life

is not only forgiven

but it's so forgiven

that I can't even

remember what it was.

Do you know

that I've loved you

from all eternity

and that no matter

what happens

I can't stop

loving you?

Do you believe

that Jesus would tell you

that if he walked

in this room

right now?

Beloved,

this is why

God loves

and adores you

because of his son,

because of what

Jesus did for you.

Your sins

have been eternally

forgiven.

When the Father

looks at you,

he doesn't look at you

with shameful contempt.

He looks at you

and he smiles.

This God,

his Holy Spirit

who we love

and serve

with our lives

is the same God

who gave us

his son

who paid the debt

for our sins

so that God's promises

would be fully

redeemed again.

Redeemed,

forgiven,

and loved.

This is who you are

before God the Father

and God does not want you

to ever forget it.

You are his

forever.

Let's pray.

Father,

could this

glorious news

be true

that no matter

how wicked

the works

of our hands,

no matter

how sinful

our hearts,

that you would

offer us

love,

forgiveness,

and redemption.

Father,

thank you.

Thank you for

the Spirit

who not only

grieves

in our disobedience,

but the Spirit

who lovingly

comes into

our hearts

and lives.

Father,

hopefully right now

in this moment

and reminds us

of this truth,

reminds us

of the good news

of the gospel.

Would you work that

in the hearts

of these,

your people?

Would you remind us

of this,

not only today

but throughout this week

as we enter

into a broken

and sinful world

and face the reality

of our sinful hearts

again?

Father,

remind us

of this good news

and we thank you

for it.

In Jesus' name.

Amen.

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