Ephesians 3:17-19 "A Relational Community"

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We're thinking this morning as we've already begun celebrating God's love about relationships

in the family of God.

And as we get started this morning, I want us to look briefly at a passage in Ephesians

3 that orients this topic in the broader conversation that we've been having about our core commitments,

about being a church that God would use to bring revival and renewal.

See, it's really easy to think that relationships within the church are about this inwardly focused,

self-serving idea, but they're actually at the heart of the others-focused, outwardly focused

mission that God has called us to.

We see that in Ephesians where Paul's writing to a church and he's telling its members about

God's grace that has come and rescued each of them.

That's where it starts.

But very quickly he moves to say God's grace hasn't just come to each of you individually,

but to a whole community of you.

That actually Jesus in the cross has rescued Jew and Gentile and brought them into one family.

That's chapter 2.

It's the work of Christ on the cross, the bond of His love that unites.

And that group that's united, he then says this is where the remarkable power of God is at work,

to do things that they couldn't even imagine doing.

He says the way you plug in to that power that He's going to show through you is through knowing

more and more of His love.

This is what we've been saying the last three weeks, that the church must be focused on Jesus.

That when we are, God promises to do amazing things, to build His kingdom, to storm the gates of hell through us.

And that of course we are utterly dependent upon Him, His power that is going to be working if that's going to happen.

So as we figure out what does it look like together to depend on Him today,

one little phrase in the midst of this conversation in Ephesians,

says the necessity of vital relationships within the church.

This love of God is what we must grasp more and more for His power to flow through us.

And it is experienced, this one phrase says,

together with all the saints.

In other words, what Paul's saying in one sentence,

a church prayerfully dependent on God for its Christ-centered mission must lock arms in meaningful relationships.

Locking arms with each other to move outward.

Listen to this glorious passage in that light.

Ephesians 3 verse 17, this is God's holy word.

Ephesians 3:17

And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love,

may have power together with all the saints

to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ.

To know this love that surpasses knowledge,

that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine,

according to His power that is at work within us,

to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus,

throughout all generations, forever and ever.

Amen.

Let's pray together.

Father, all glory is Yours.

May there be glory to You in this place,

in this community,

as we know and love and reflect our Savior more.

May they know You because they see Your love in us.

Through that we ask for the glory of Jesus.

Amen.

It's been a long time since I agreed to participate in a three-legged race.

You may have been in one before.

If you're at all like me, it's fraught with danger.

If you're like me, a person who is very competitive

and who believes that everything should be done at full speed,

all the time, no matter what, three-legged race is.

It's not where you should start.

The idea, of course, is to move in sync with your partner

across the finish line, right?

Seems fairly simple.

The catch, of course, is that you each have a leg tied together.

If you've never been to a field day before,

you know how disastrous these can be.

And if you haven't seen it, let me tell you the secret.

The key is that bond that is connecting the two legs.

It has to be tied really tightly to keep you together.

Working with your teammate to move at the same pace,

to support each other,

to cross the finish line and win the race together.

If that bond gets loose or you try to win the race alone,

no matter how good an athlete you are,

it will get ugly very fast.

This is usually the way it ends,

and the finish line is far in the distance.

It's simply not a race that you can win on your own.

We've said that the same is true

for the mission God has called us to

as His people in this world.

We're designed to lean on each other.

It's together with all the saints

that our vision of God's love grows.

We say that, but we love to try on our own, don't we?

And we often end up face down in the grass.

We've bought into the lie

that me and Jesus is enough, really.

That surface relationships and social media connections

is really deep community and all that I'll ever need.

That having a busy schedule where I see lots of people,

that that qualifies as true community.

That's one I believe a lot.

We like the perceived safety of anonymity, don't we?

We fear being exposed if we move out of our isolation

and we're truly known by someone.

We've been hiding behind fig leaves

since the very first sin in the garden, haven't we?

We all do it differently,

but do you feel that reality in your life?

That you have that tendency to do that?

Let me ask you a couple of questions.

Is there anyone at all

with whom you have shared your secret sin struggle?

Who has a hunting license in your heart and life

to ask you hard questions?

Do you ever feel like no one at church

or maybe no one at all truly understands you?

Have you had friends from church get divorced

and you didn't even have any idea

they were struggling or having any trouble at all?

When was the last time you redirected plans you had made

based on input from a brother or sister?

See, all too often we try to run on our own, don't we?

We think, I got this.

I can win this race.

I'm strong.

I'm fast.

Plus, it's risky to involve anybody else.

All too often the church is sprawled

face down across the grass

with legs loosely dangling from each other

rather than running in sync

towards our neighbors bound tightly together.

No one has ever won a three-legged race

or brought revival on his own.

The bond for our three-legged race, if you will,

is Jesus.

He unites us to each other

in a way that must produce

radically different relationships

from what most of us are used to.

What kind of relationships develop

in a Christ-centered community?

One where his influence is primary,

where his word directs our relationships.

What's different when the bond of Jesus unites us?

Well, first, and there are a lot of these.

I'm just looking at a couple this morning.

We value people not because of what they offer us,

but because of who they are.

Relationships in this world often form

because someone helps us.

We invest further in the relationship

because they offer us laughter

or support or advancement

in some sort of way, right?

You do this all the time.

They help the team succeed.

It makes me look good or feel good

to be with them.

Value comes from something you do.

In God's family, it must be different.

We value people, period.

They are not a means to an end.

We don't see them merely as tools.

People are valuable in themselves

as created in the image of God,

a relational God within the Trinity

who creates us to reflect that image

in relationship with each other.

And then people are valuable and significant

as children of God.

In his family, the bond of Jesus unites us,

whether you improve my social status,

whether you help me get the project done,

whether you have money to contribute or not.

All the saints, valuable in one body,

one family.

We say in our core commitments,

we genuinely love people

and are committed to developing

life-giving relationships.

These relationships where people are valued

for themselves.

It means that we genuinely listen to each other,

that we sincerely seek to understand

each other's perspective.

We even share of ourselves

and of our lives with each other.

Listen, we've all been in relationships

where we know we're not valuable

to the other person, right?

They didn't really care about what I said.

They never shared vulnerably with me.

They just got what they needed from me

and moved on.

What I had to offer was valuable.

I was not.

They and I stayed safely hidden.

We didn't have to know each other

to get what we needed, perhaps,

from each other.

Jesus creates a different kind of relationship.

Secondly, the bond of Jesus

produces relationships

where sins are regularly confessed

and forgiven.

Listen to James chapter 5.

James 5 · chapter mention

Therefore, confess your sins to one another

and pray for one another

that you may be healed.

This is to be normative in Jesus' church.

It's the way we're to relate regularly.

When was the last time you sat down

with someone outside your family

and confessed specific sin?

It seems a little scary,

like something really bad

must have happened, right?

God's word says this is normal.

This is how we relate to each other.

It's a pretty tight bond, isn't it,

that Jesus creates.

See, because our value

comes not from our performance,

but from being in His family,

we're freed to be honest

with each other.

See, because that's true of all of us,

because I'm never the only sinner

in the conversation,

because we all are sinners

saved by grace,

I never open up and confess a sin

to an innocent party

who can look down on me

and condemn me.

I'm always confessing

to a fellow sinner

who has forgiveness in Jesus

to extend to me.

We share our sins

and pray for each other,

and there's healing

in that kind of prayer,

that kind of relationship,

James says.

There is, isn't there?

Have you experienced that?

Healing in my relationship with God

and healing in my relationship

with my brother or sister

because we look to Jesus together.

Our experience of that bond

grows stronger,

and we're pulled together

to run the race better.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer writes

in his classic book

on Christian community,

Life Together,

in confession,

the breakthrough to community

takes place.

Sin demands to have a man

by himself.

It withdraws him

from the community.

Sin wants to remain unknown.

Hiding, right?

That's why we don't share

and confess much.

Sin pulls us away

and wants us to keep it

to ourselves,

and Bonhoeffer says

there's danger there

in being pulled away

into isolation

with our sin,

but the gospel of Jesus Christ

breaks in

and allows confession

that brings the sinner

back to the fellowship

of sinners saved by grace.

Bonhoeffer concludes this,

beautiful.

If a Christian is in the fellowship

of confession

with a brother,

he will never be alone again

anywhere.

Yes.

Yes, as we confess

and we forgive each other.

And listen,

to us natural hiders,

that sounds a bit scary,

doesn't it?

I know it can

to think about

stepping out there

and being exposed.

It's not really worth the risk.

Why would I bother?

But God is telling us

in His Word,

this is the kind of relationship

I've created you for.

To know this

and to enjoy this.

I've sent my son

so that you can have

the safety,

the ability

to have this kind of

honest relationship

where people know

and they forgive

and love,

and they love the real you.

the sinful version,

not merely the Facebook version

of you

that some of them like,

but they know and love

and forgive the real you.

One more unique thing

about relationships

through the bond of Jesus.

We delight

to carry each other's burdens.

In the world,

relationships are typically

you scratch my back,

I'll scratch yours, right?

Community does come.

It comes when you invest

in others.

You give to them.

You serve them.

And when you need help,

they'll give back to you.

They'll be there for you.

They'll carry your burdens.

I remember watching this

unfold at our school

a few years ago

when one family

who seemed to lovingly

and tirelessly

serve everybody

in every situation

had a child

that had surgery.

And all of a sudden,

out of the woodwork,

everybody came out

because they'd been served

by this family

so many times.

They thought,

how can we support you?

How can we help?

We're all in.

And that's beautiful

and wonderful

and good in community

that you respond

to help someone

who has helped you.

Y'all,

biblical community

goes far beyond that

and is so much more glorious.

It says something

a little different.

Jesus has carried

all my burdens,

poured himself out

for me

to overflowing,

served me so consistently

that I am delighted

to do the same

for all of you,

whether you've personally

poured into me

or not,

for all of you,

and especially if Jesus

has brought you

into his family too,

right?

Say,

come on, preacher.

That's what it's like.

That's what Jesus does,

doesn't he?

He pours himself into us

so that it will overflow

from us to others,

not so that we'll see

who we owe lately.

That's community

created by God's word

and his spirit.

Doesn't your spirit resonate

with that truth,

with that reality?

It's not because

it's my words,

it's God's word.

It's right there

in James 5,

the passage we looked

at earlier.

You're suffering,

you're sick,

you're struggling

with sin,

share those things,

pray together,

mourn with those

who mourn,

rejoice with those

who rejoice.

Galatians 6,

2,

carry one another's

burdens

and so fulfill

the law of Christ.

This passage

in Galatians

is in the context

of our sin,

burdens of sin,

spiritual burdens.

In Acts chapter 2,

Acts 2 · chapter mention

the picture

of the early church

that we read

last week

says they were

committed

to the fellowship

among other things.

Carrying each other's

physical burdens,

sharing all they had

to care for each other's

physical needs,

right?

I love how this

church family

here at Southwood

does this.

We've experienced that.

We as a church

are not perfect.

We want to keep

growing here

in this area.

But brothers and sisters

helping others

walk through

healing from an affair.

Crying and supporting

each other

through the loss

of a loved one.

Just this week

showing up

to help someone

recover from a car accident.

And that church member

that was in the accident

this week

said of the love

that she'd received

not just in that moment

but over the previous months,

I don't know

how I could ever

repay all of them.

You don't.

We're family.

That's what being

a community

of grace

means.

You don't

repay anybody.

You just look

for the next person

who's got a burden

that you can help carry

because Jesus

has already

carried yours,

right?

Y'all,

this is the kind

of community

God is making us

if we will but

lean into Him,

trust Him,

let His love

overwhelm us together

so that it overflows

from us.

See,

Ephesians told us

it was all about

experiencing God's love,

right?

That's where

the power was from.

It told us

we needed

all the saints

to grasp

the height

and width

and breadth

and depth

of God's love.

All the saints.

It's a pretty

broad term.

Involves a lot

of people,

some of whom

you've probably

never met.

With whom

does the bond

of Jesus

put us

in relationship?

We're going to

talk about this

more in our last

core commitment

where we see

particularly

the beauty

and the priority

of loving

the least,

the lost,

the littlest,

the lonely,

and the left out,

even beyond

God's family.

But for today,

let's stop at

what all

the saints

means.

It means

at least this.

I need

way more

than those

like me

and those

I like.

Way more

than those

like me

and those

I like.

this is

where the

power of

the gospel,

the beauty

of Christ-centered

community

really becomes

evident

because Jesus

bonds together

people who are

otherwise

different.

Remember,

he makes

enemies

family

who love

each other

for Christ's

sake,

even if there's

no other

reason.

We don't

gather out of

mutual admiration

we like

each other,

but out of

shared admiration

we love

God

because he

has loved

us.

See,

apart from

Christ,

the power

of self-pursuit

and my own

preferences,

it puts me

in relationship

with people

who are like

me.

It puts me

in community

with others

that I

naturally

and easily

click with,

who root

for the same

football team,

who vote

for the same

party,

who like

the same

worship style.

Listen,

Jesus doesn't

need to be

around for

you to

connect with

people like

that,

right?

That's how

you naturally

function,

pursuing what's

comfortable for

you.

But Jesus

puts me in

different

relationships.

He puts me

in relationship

where our

differences,

which are

usually divisive

in other

arenas in

life and

keep us

apart,

are actually

desirable

people because

they show

us what?

Greater

dimensions

of God's

love.

Remember,

that's what

we need

all the

saints for,

right?

Grasping a

greater vision

of God's

love.

Think with me

for just a

minute how

people different

from you

enlarge and

expand your

view of

God's love

as you live

in relationship

with them,

valuing them

personally,

confessing and

forgiving sins,

carrying each

other's burden.

We could go

on all day,

but think just

a few examples.

When you share

life with a

materially poor

brother or

sister and you

listen to them

well, you might

get a glimpse of

depending on God

to provide one

meal at a

time.

Like God

thought was so

important to

teach his Old

Testament people,

his daily

love may become

sweeter to you.

love.

When you engage

in relationship

with a married

couple, you may

see a broken

but beautiful

picture of the

love of God

and people

bearing with

one another

through deep

sin and

offense.

Forgiving as

God has

forgiven them

and his

persistent love

may become

more glorious

in your eyes.

But when those

of us who are

married engage

in relationship

with an

unmarried

brother or

sister, you

may realize

afresh the

reality that

God's love

is so great

it provides

fulfillment and

identity apart

from my family

or my sexuality.

You might learn

the joy of

singleness that

such brothers as

Jesus and

Paul knew.

And God's

love may become

more satisfying

to your heart

than you realized

it could be.

I wish you

all would have

the privilege

I have to

know former

prostitutes,

ex-convicts,

recovering addicts

who find freedom

from their shame

in this forgiving

and cleansing

love of God.

By the way,

if you listen

long enough

to people's

stories in this

church, you

will know them.

If you confess

sins to each

other, you'll

learn that.

And your

ability to

comprehend the

love of a

God who makes

you new

will grow.

I wish every

newlywed couple

in the church

could have been

in my small

group to watch

Miss Betty

love Mr. John

through his

last few years

of life as he

struggled to

know where he

was or what

was going on.

As I got to

watch them

together, I

witnessed the

patient and

tender love

of God in her

that treasures

us in our

weakness.

in a new

way that has

helped me

in my

marriage.

Younger

people struggling

to hope in

God's promises

as they

parent.

They may see in

older people's

stories a God

whose love is

faithful to his

promises even

when it doesn't

look like it.

Older people

struggling to

maintain a zeal

for the kingdom

in their later

years may see in

younger people's

stories a God

whose love is the

only hope of the

next generation.

God's love is

so great.

I still have a

purpose to

testify to that

love and it's a

great purpose.

You get the idea

of how beautiful

God's design for

his church is?

We're a family.

Same loving

father, same

older brother,

same indwelling

spirit.

This is why we

need to lean into

these deep

relationships with

each other so we

will experience his

love more and be

empowered to share

that love so that

my neighbors and

Huntsville and the

whole world will

know more of his

glory.

Let me talk to you

for just a couple

minutes as we close

about our new

Connect communities.

I really want to

encourage you all to

participate in these

Connect communities as

we pursue these kind

of life-giving

relationships.

relationships.

To be clear, I hope

you realize as we

talk this morning that

these kind of

relationships where

we're confessing sin

and carrying burdens

and valuing each

other, they don't

take place in one

hour a week in a

room of 30 people.

We got way too many

sins and burdens for

that, yes?

Yep, we don't have

time for mine next

week.

So it's not just

there, but God's

word is calling us,

challenging us to

lock arms with

brothers and sisters

more often than on

Sundays.

Breaking bread together

in each other's homes,

helping each other out

day by day, praying in

every situation.

Those relationships take

time to foster, don't

they?

And they're well worth

it.

Even our precious time

that is so valuable is

well worth the

investment.

So think of connect

communities as places

that we come together

around God's word, not

as placing you at the

destination of

relationship, but rather

moving you down the

path of relationship.

They're called connect

communities for a

reason.

You may well meet a

brother or sister there

with whom you develop

deeper relationship

beyond the group.

We will urge each

other there toward

meeting regularly in

small groups to share

and confess and forgive

and pray more.

So if it's a three

legged race that we're

on, the connect

community is not the

finish line, but rather

the starting line where

you find your partner,

where you get bound

together through Jesus

and his word to run the

race together.

together.

Y'all don't go home to

run alone.

Lean into the

relationships that God

has made us for.

You know, the tightness

of that bond that we have

in Jesus is so vitally

important.

But no matter how tight you

tie that bond, most of the

three legged races I run in

end up with people scattered

on the ground.

Relationships, even in

Jesus, even in the church

are messy, aren't they?

Yes?

Can we get amen on that

one?

Yeah, okay.

Come on, we gotta pick our

spots here.

That seemed like an easy

one.

It's messier than

isolation, than hiding

alone, isn't it?

But that's actually another

reason that relationships

are worth the investment.

It's not merely that Jesus

unites us in relationship.

But these relationships

drive us back to Jesus,

don't they?

Because when I get tied

tightly to a brother or

sister and rub up against

them, my selfishness and my

weakness and my insecurity

become exposed.

And I see it.

And I see my need for a

Savior and a cross again.

But guess what?

I'm not the only one who

sees it.

This is the scary but

beautiful part.

My brother or sister sees

it too and is right there to

point me to the Savior we

both have who will never

leave us.

Two are better than one.

For if they fall, one will

lift up his fellow.

But pity the one who falls and

has no one to help him up.

Praise God for a Savior.

And because of him, brothers

and sisters to help us up.

Let's pray.

Father, we confess our need of

you again.

We need your help.

Father, we need your love.

And we especially this

morning need your spirit to

acknowledge that we need

each other.

Father, show us that this is

what you've created us for.

That we might be known and

that we might be loved.

And you have loved us like

that.

Thank you for being the one

place we know we can be safe.

Father, would your love

transform a community like

this one that people would

begin to experience more and

more safety among each other

that they've found in you.

Help us to love as we have

been loved.

Thank you, Jesus, for your

love.

Show it to us again this

morning.

It's height and width and

depth and breadth that it

would change our hearts.

We thank you and we pray in

your name.

Amen.

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