Pure Church:Pure Relationships

Titus 2, 1-10

Titus 3, 1-10

Teach slaves to be subject to their masters in everything, to try to please them, not to talk back to them and not to steal from them, but to show that they can be fully trusted, so that in every way they will make the teaching about God our Saviour attractive.

Thanks. Thanks, Kim.

So, Titus chapter 2

Titus 2 · chapter mention

And pure church

Let's pray

And ask for God's help as we look at this together.

Our Father God, we thank you so much for your word. We thank you for this letter written many, many years ago.

But yet it is still your words written to us today to speak to us not as individuals, but to speak to us as a church corporately.

And so we gather together under your word asking that your spirit would give us understanding and application to our own hearts and lives.

That what we hear and what we listen to and what we talk about afterwards would change us and affect us in how we live.

So we pray that you would help us now in our time together in Jesus' name. Amen.

Well, the big theme of this short letter, Titus, is all about being and becoming a pure church.

And a key verse for this we see in chapter 2, verse 14.

That Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own eager to do what is good.

So God's desire is that we, his people, would become pure.

That we would become like Christ.

And that in turn, as we become like Christ, that we would reflect his purity and his beauty to the world and the community around us.

And today we're looking at what it is to have pure relationships.

And the purpose is exactly the same.

So look at chapter 2, the end of verse 10.

As we think about pure relationships, their purpose, the end of verse 10,

so that in every way they will make the teaching about God our Saviour attractive.

Our relationships with one another have the potential to reflect the beauty of God our Saviour.

But our relationships also have the potential to make Christ look ugly.

So we're going to look at three things this morning.

First, getting our broken relationships in order.

Second, living in pure relationship with each other.

And third, reflecting a Christ relationship to the world.

So we've got to get our relationships in order.

We're going to see how living that pure relationship, what it looks like,

and then how that in turn reflects the beauty of Christ to the world.

So first of all, getting our broken relationships in order.

You can flick that up on the screen there.

Getting our broken relationships in order.

In pure doctrine, false teaching has had a direct effect on the relationships within the church.

So chapter 1, verse 11.

They must be silenced.

These are the false teachers.

They must be silenced because they are ruining whole households

by teaching things they ought not to teach.

These households are small house churches.

And because of the false teaching, they've begun to break up.

Their impure teaching has led to all kinds of impure living within the family of the church.

So look at chapter 2.

The older men, verse 2, have become grumpy old men.

They've lost people's respect.

They've become uncontrolled in what they say and what they do.

The older women, verse 3, have become gossipy old bags.

Slandering others as they open up another bottle of wine.

The younger women, verse 5, have become celebrity wannabes.

They're too busy looking after themselves and wanting to run off and play

and have neglected their responsibility to their children and husbands.

The younger men, verse 6, have become obsessed with a playboy status.

They have their heads stuck in men's bags rather than in God's word.

The employed, verse 9, have become lazy and arrogant.

Out to make as much as possible by doing as little as possible.

So you see, this impure teaching is ruining these small churches.

It's leading to all kinds of impure living.

And the relationships within the church family are beginning to break up

and they're not the way they should be.

So how can we begin to heal and restore these broken relationships?

Well, look at chapter 2, verse 1.

You must teach what is in accord with sound doctrine.

Verse 2, teach the older men.

Verse 3, likewise teach the older women.

Verse 6, similarly encourage the young men.

And verse 9, teach the slaves or those who are employed.

You see, if impure teaching breaks relationships,

the solution is pure teaching.

The sound doctrine, the good news of God's grace,

taught to the church family and worked out into people's lives

are going to restore those relationships.

It's true, what we take into our lives is what we become.

So if we eat all the wrong things, we become very unhealthy.

But if we eat our fruit and veg, well, we become healthy.

Similarly, he's saying here, if we are feeding on pure doctrine,

if we are drinking it down with the pure grace of God,

then he will renew us and he will restore us.

God's grace purifies us.

He washes us so that we can live in pure relationship with each other.

So the means to get these broken relationships in order,

the antidote, the solution,

is a healthy diet of God's word,

his grace being worked out in our lives.

So second, getting our broken relationships in order,

how do these relationships look like

when they're being lived out amongst each other?

Flick that up on the screen.

As we look at the various relationships

within the church family here in chapter two,

it's probably hard for us to try and work out,

and I've been joking with people through the week,

kind of what category are you going to put yourself in?

Are you an older man or are you a younger man?

Or are you an old woman or a young woman?

Well, I don't want to get myself into trouble

and I'm not going to say, right, all the old women sit here

and all the old men sit there or anything else like that.

I don't want to cause offence.

I'm just going to offend everybody

and just say that, well, sometimes we're younger

and sometimes we're older.

There's always people who are older

and there are always people that are younger.

So I think it applies to us all

in different contexts, depending who we're with.

So don't be just kind of thinking,

well, I'm not an older woman or I'm not an older man,

so this doesn't apply to me.

I think in some ways it applies to us all.

And what we're going to do this morning

is just look at the older, younger relationships,

primarily this morning,

just for the sake of time and just to focus in on that.

So we're going to take a look at these relationships

and see what they ought to look like in practice.

First, older men, listen up.

Verse 2.

Teach older men to be temperate,

worthy of respect,

self-controlled,

and sound in faith,

sound in love,

and sound in endurance.

You know, there's a sad fact

that as men get older,

they become more grumpy.

Have you experienced that

if you live with an older man?

I don't mean complaints

about not being able to use the latest technology

and how the mobile phone works

and all that sort of stuff.

I mean they can sometimes become

impatient with people.

Younger people just seem to become

an irritable nuisance.

They are not, look at verse 2,

temperate or self-controlled

in what they say and do.

In fact, as they age,

they begin to sadly lose all respect.

Older men,

we ought to be the kind of people

that younger people

want to be around

and look up to.

Okay, they might want to hang out with you.

They might call you your best buddy

and go to the cinema with you.

But older men,

we ought to have this kind of character

about us

that makes us approachable

and that makes us attractive

in the sense that people

actually want to talk with us.

wise and mature people,

verse 2,

who are sound in faith,

have a good grasp

of what God's word is about.

Sound in love,

who are solid

in their love

and in their endurance.

They keep going in the faith.

So young people

shouldn't think of themselves

as being an irritable nuisance,

rather they should see you

as one they can come to

for encouragement

when they're struggling

in the faith.

That they would come to you

for comfort

when life brings

all the disappointments

that it does.

That you are a rock,

someone who brings stability

in times of uncertainty.

for older men.

We have a responsibility

not just to our own family,

but we have a real role

to the whole church family.

Younger men should be like

your own son.

The younger women

should be like your own daughter.

You should have that shoulder

they can cry on.

You should have that gentle

word of correction

when you see them

going a path

that is not going to be helpful.

You gently get alongside

and instruct.

And you are the support

that gets around them

and encourages them on

in their faith.

So older men,

let the sound doctrine,

let the grace of God

instruct your mind.

Let it grab a hold

of your heart

and begin to shape

your heart

to be the older man

that God has called you to be

within the family

of the church.

Second,

the older women.

Verse 3.

Likewise,

teach the older women

to be reverent

in the way they live,

not to be slanderers

or addicted to too much wine,

but to teach what is good.

You know,

it's also a sad fact

that as women get older,

they can become

gossipy old bags.

They become busybodies,

poking their noses

into people's business

and then relaying it

to their friends

over a few bottles

of Chardonnay.

They're out to enjoy

their retirement.

They've raised their kids.

Now it's time to kick back

and enjoy life.

Don't have kids anymore.

Don't need to worry about them.

Let me do the things

I want to do.

You know,

there's something

very unattractive

about that kind of woman.

Not very pleasant

to be around.

Instead,

look at verse 3.

They are to be

reverent

in the way

that they live.

Instead of smelling

of stale wine,

they should smell

with the beauty of Christ

as they walk

into the room

and as they engage

and talk with people,

there should be

an aroma of Christ.

And instead of thinking

retirement,

which the Bible

actually knows

nothing about,

they should be

investing

in the younger mothers

who are struggling.

Look at verse 4.

Then they can train

the younger women

to love their husbands

and children.

That's what older women

are to do,

to train the younger women

to love their husbands

and children.

And you train

the younger women

by the things

that you say

as you get alongside them

and the way

that you live

your life.

The very fact

that you're older

means that you have

a wealth of experience.

It's not that

you're perfect.

It's not that

you've done

nothing wrong.

It means you've

made lots of mistakes

but you've learned

from your mistakes.

You've been there,

done that,

you've got the t-shirt.

Sweat,

blood and tears

are your experience

and you can pass

that on

to those

who are younger.

So I'm going to

push the boat out

this morning.

I've already called

the older men

grumpy old men

and women

old bags

so let's push

the boat right out.

Those who go

to polo,

I think it's primarily

younger women,

why don't you

invite

some of the

older women,

I'll let you

decide who they are,

to come and share

God's word

with you,

to let them

sit

to encourage you

and to support

you as young

mothers.

That's the role

of older women.

And those of you

who go to

the ladies'

study,

on the

Thursday,

think about

how you can

practically

help those

with young

children.

What can we do

to support

the many

young families

and those

with younger

kids

in the life

of the church?

Now we might

kind of struggle

with that

and think,

hmm,

not so sure

about it,

but this is

what the family

relationship

looks like.

responsibility

to one

another.

So,

let the

sound doctrine,

let the

grace of God,

older women,

instruct your

minds,

grab your

heart,

and shape

your heart

to be the

older women

that God

has called

you to be.

third,

the younger

women,

verse 5.

they are to

be self-controlled

and pure,

to be

busy at

home,

to be

kind,

to be

subject to

their husbands

so that

no one

will malign

the word

of God.

you know,

it's also

true that

many younger

women live

life regretting

that they

ever got

married,

regretting

that they've

ever had

children.

They would

much prefer

to be out

gallivanting

with their

friends,

not having

to be at

home,

changing

nappies.

They have

neglected

their

responsibility

to their

children and

husbands,

and are

still running

about living

as if they

are single.

Instead,

verse 5,

they are

to be

self-controlled,

pure,

busy at

home.

Or better

translated,

I think,

that busy

at home

is working

at home,

loving

their

home.

Because

there's a

big lie

out there

today that

says,

caring for

children

and looking

after the

family home

is actually

a downgrade.

If that's

what you

do,

it's

demeaning

and it

ruins your

chances of

a real

career.

Well,

I want to

address and

I want to

encourage every

mother of

children represented

here,

especially

those who

are younger

mothers.

far from

being a

low

position,

this is

a high

position,

far from

a second

rate career

and as if

you're kind

of taking

a step

down,

this is

a step

up.

This is a

great career,

this is a

God-given

blessed

career.

Of course,

it doesn't

mean that

mothers can't

pursue an

outside

profession.

Of course

they can.

But it

will never

be to the

neglect of

their own

children and

husbands.

Young

women,

if you

are married

and if

you have

children,

your primary

responsibility,

as God's

word is

saying here

in verse

five, is

to love

them well,

is to

care for

them well.

That's your

first responsibility.

And to

love your

husband,

verse five,

is to

be subject

to your

husband.

Of course,

that doesn't

mean that

the wife

is this

obedient

one around

the house

who obeys

the husband's

every beck and

call as if

she were

kind of

subhuman.

And below

everybody else,

that is not

the right

interpretation.

That's wrong.

We know from

the rest of

scripture that

a husband's

responsibility

is to

serve his

wife with

sacrificial

love and

care.

Sacrificially.

So to be

subject to

your husband

is to

live under

his loving

and protective

care and

not to be

out gallivanting

or running

around looking

for that

love and

care from

someone else

or something

else.

This is

God's

beautiful

design for

home and

for family

relationships.

So,

younger women,

let the

sound

doctrine,

let the

grace of

God instruct

your mind.

Let it

grab a hold

of your

heart and

shape your

heart to

be the

younger woman

that God

has called

you to

be.

The

fourth in

this list of

relationships that

we're looking

at is

younger men.

Verse

six,

similarly

encourage the

young men to

be self-controlled.

It's

true that

young men

today have

one aim

in life.

That's to

meet lots

of young

women and

to have

sex with

them.

That's the

average young

man's outlook

on life.

Go to

college,

interview

them,

that's what

they're about.

And

sadly,

it's becoming

the practice

within church

life.

Now,

from what I

know of

the young

single men

within the

family of

this church,

and I

do try to

keep tabs

on you

all,

have my

spies out

there,

I don't

think that

is necessarily

the case.

However,

what I want

to say to

the younger

men is

that you

must be

very,

very careful

how you

treat

younger

women.

You are

to learn,

verse five,

to be

self-controlled.

Self-control

covers every

area of

our life.

It covers

our words

and our

actions,

how we

speak,

how we

behave,

but in

particular,

and I

want to

focus on

this,

self-control

over your

sexual life.

Instead of

watching

internet

porn,

delight

yourself

in God's

word.

here is

how you

must treat

younger

women.

Go back

a couple

of pages

to 1

Timothy

chapter

five.

There are

a lot of

parallels

between

Titus and

Timothy.

1

Timothy

chapter

five,

verse

one.

Here is

how younger

women should

behave.

Sorry,

younger men

should behave.

Paul is

writing to

Timothy,

who is a

young man,

and so he

says to the

young man,

and I think

here is the

principle for

us,

young men

do not

rebuke an

older man

harshly,

but exhort

him as if

he were

your father.

Treat

younger men

as brothers.

Treat

older women

as your

mother.

And here is

the point.

Treat

younger women

as sisters

with

absolute

purity.

I hope

you got

that.

And I

want to

say to

you young

lads,

enjoy your

relationships

with the

young women,

by that I

mean your

friendships.

hang out

with each

other in

the safety

of a

crowd.

Enjoy

those young

years together,

have fun

together,

but young

men,

treat them

as your

sister with

absolute

purity.

Be a

big brother

to them,

not a

creepy

leecher.

love

love

love

so young

men,

let the

sound

doctrine,

let the

grace of

God

instruct

your

mind,

let it

grab a

hold of

your

heart

and shape

your

heart

to be

the

godly

younger

man

that God

has called

you to

be.

so older

men

and older

women,

younger

men and

younger

women,

that's all

of us who

are here.

Our

relationships

within the

church

family

are to be

pure

and we

need to

pray that

God by

his

Holy

Spirit

will

purify

us

so that

we are

eager to

do

what

is

good.

Third,

reflecting a

Christ

relationship

to the

world.

You see,

the purpose

of getting

our broken

relationships

in order,

the reason

for living

in pure

relationship

with each

other,

is

beautifully

described

at the

end of

verse 10.

Yes,

it's talking

there primarily

about employees

and employers,

but I think

it applies to

all relationships.

Look at the

end of

verse 10.

Here's the

purpose,

here's the

reason,

so that

in every

way,

they will

make the

teaching

about God

our

Saviour

attractive.

So,

class,

listen up,

question time.

What will

make someone

want to

listen to

the grace

of Jesus

Christ?

What will

make someone

want to

listen to

the grace

of Jesus

Christ,

to the

teaching?

Answer,

they see

lives within

the church

family that

have been

transformed

by the

grace of

Jesus

Christ.

Our

relationships

are to

make the

teaching

about God

our Saviour

attractive to

the world

and to

the community.

Church

family

relationships

between the

older and

the younger,

between men

and women

in all their

various forms

are to be

lived under

the grace

of God

and when

they are

lived under

the grace

of God

they are

incredibly

beautiful to

look at.

The church

of God

is the

most wonderful

thing to

see.

And when

we see

our pure

relationships

in action

they are

deeply

attractive.

There is

nothing more

beautiful to

see older

men and

older women

and younger

men and

younger women

living their

lives under

God's grace.

That is

beautiful.

You don't

see that

anywhere else

in the

world.

That's what

the church

is about.

So as

people watch

us,

as people

admire,

they are

drawn into

the teaching

about God

our

Saviour.

And pure

relationships

are worth

putting the

effort into.

They are

worth working

hard for.

Look at the

end of

verse 5,

the very

last sentence,

so that

no one

will malign

the word

of God.

That we

actually begin

to look like

the Christ

that we

talk about

and that

we say

we follow.

Our pure

relationships

are what we

work towards.

look at the

end of

verse 8,

so that

those who

oppose you

may be

ashamed

because they

have nothing

bad to

say about

us.

In other

words,

that we

behave in

such a

way that

it proves

the Christ

we believe

in is

true.

If our

pure

relationships

have the

ability to

attract

people to

Christ,

then the

opposite is

also true.

Impure,

broken,

damaged

relationships

make Jesus

Christ look

ugly to

the world

and to the

community

around us.

So what

kind of

Christ

do people

see when

they look at

our relationships

one to

another?

what kind

of Christ

do we

display to

the world?

A small

diamond

stone,

just a

tiny little

stone,

has value,

has worth,

and it has a

certain beauty.

But when the

jeweller takes

that diamond

stone and

then he

places it

into a

little gold

band to

make a

ring,

and then

he lifts

the diamond

up on

the ring

so that

the light

catches it

and it

begins to

sparkle and

to shine,

then and

only then

do we see

the diamond's

true value,

its ultimate

worth and

its excellent

beauty.

And in the

same way

God has

placed the

diamond of

God's grace,

the grace of

Christ,

into our

lives.

love and

love and

it's

embedded into

our lives

when we've

trusted him

and when we

begin to

live out our

relationships with

each other

as he

intends,

then and

only then

can the

world see

the true

value,

the ultimate

worth and

the excellent

beauty of

God,

our

Saviour,

Jesus Christ.

It's only

as we

begin to

live out

our faith

that the

gospel begins

to shine

brightly and

people are

attracted,

they are

drawn in

to the

teaching of

God,

our Saviour.

That is

something

wonderful

that the

church has.

So let

me say

this in

closing to

us all.

Let the

sound

doctrine,

let the

grace of

God our

Saviour

instruct our

minds,

let it

grab a

hold of

our hearts,

let it

pummel it

and shape

it and

transform our

hearts so

that we

become pure

in our

relationships

one to

another.

and reflect

the beauty

of Christ

to the

community

and to

the world

around us.

Let's

pray.

Amen.

older men,

older women,

younger men

and younger

women,

may the

grace of

God work

deeply in

our lives

so that

we become

the people

you call

us to

be.

That you

would

continually

purify

us and

shape

us.

And in

your mercy

and in

your goodness

that we

would let

the gospel

shine

brightly.

that as

we walk

into this

world and

into this

community

that people

will be

attracted

to the

gospel of

Jesus

Christ.

We thank

you so much

for this

church family.

Thank you

so much for

every single

person and

every family

represented

here.

thank you

for bringing

us together

from all

different kinds

of backgrounds.

Thank you

for your

work within

our lives.

Thank you

that we are

here by

your design,

by your

pleasure.

And please

will you go

on working

in us.

We pray

this for

your honour

and for

your glory

alone.

In Jesus'

name we

all pray.

Amen.