Yes or No? The Marriage Referendum

define marriage as between one man and one woman, it is assumed and implied.

So Article 41.3 reads from our Constitution,

the state pledges to guard with special care the institution of marriage

on which the family is founded and to protect it against attack.

In fact, our laws that we have within our country define marriage as between one man and one woman

and this has been reflected in legislation.

However, according to the chairperson of the Referendum Commission, Mr Justice Kevin Cross,

he says it's not going to change anything.

All it means is marriage is, and his words, broadened to include two people of the same sex.

So it doesn't change marriage.

All we're doing is broadening marriage so that it includes two people of the same sex.

So it will mean primarily two things.

First, that two people of the same sex will be able to marry each other,

just as two people of the opposite sex may marry.

And secondly, these are the two primary things,

a married couple of the opposite sex or of the same sex will be recognized as family

and be entitled to the constitutional protection for families.

Now, all the main political parties and the majority of the independents are campaigning for a yes vote

because they claim it's all about equality and rights.

So listen to what Ender Kenny said at the Fine Gael Ard Fesh some time ago.

Quote,

As we approach the centenary of the rising,

a yes vote would, I believe, send out a powerful signal internationally

that Ireland has evolved into a fair, compassionate and tolerant nation.

I believe that this is the right thing to do.

I and the Fine Gael party strongly support a yes vote.

And therefore I say to all same-sex couples in our country,

this is about you.

It's about your right to say two small words made up of three simple letters,

I do.

Now this week, if you've been paying attention to the news,

former President Mary McAleese gave her views as well.

She said this,

We want to be a human rights issue.

We want them to be born into a world where if they fall in love with someone,

they can express that love fully.

We believe it to be a human rights issue.

Now I think we all want a fair and compassionate Ireland.

We all want to be treated with equality regardless of our gender.

We want the rights of all people protected,

whatever their orientation may be.

So is it not right and fair and compassionate

to recognise the unique relationship between a man and a woman?

Wouldn't it be a tolerant society to protect the marriage institution

on which the family is founded?

You see, while every relationship,

or while every person,

we'll go back one, that's not right,

while every person should be treated with equality,

not every relationship has the same equality.

Okay?

Every person should be treated with equality,

but not every relationship has the same equality.

So let me explain.

The relationship between a brother and a sister

is different to the relationship of a son and his mother.

And that is different, again,

to the relationship between a husband and a wife.

Each individual in those relationships

has equal value and worth.

But the relationships themselves are not equal.

They're different.

Each relationship needs to be treated differently

and we have laws to protect those relationships.

You see, the marriage relationship of one man and one woman is unique.

Only one man and one woman can make new life.

Only one man and one woman can give a child a mum and a dad.

No two men or two women are ever able to do this.

So in this referendum,

we are talking about two very different kinds of relationships.

Therefore, I think it would be very wrong

to treat them as exactly the same.

In fact, if we are to say it's all about rights and equality,

then why not allow two sisters to marry?

Or why don't we allow polygamy?

Or why not legislate for open marriages

where you can go from one to the other?

Why don't we just broaden the definition of marriage

to include what...

Well, you fill in the blank.

You decide what is right for you

in terms of marriage.

The point is,

marriage is a unique relationship

and it should be treated and protected as such.

Now, as the referendum gets closer,

each side of the campaign

are playing what we call the rights card.

Everybody's saying it's this right or that right.

But I want to ask us all this morning,

who ultimately decides what is right?

Is it our laws?

Is it our politicians who say what is right?

Or is it what the outcome of the referendum says is right?

The majority of people,

will they decide what is right?

Well, ultimately for me,

and it should be the same for you if you are a Christian,

it's not what I think is right

or what you think is right.

But ultimately,

it's what God's word says is right.

That is where our authority comes from.

That is where we must submit ourselves to.

And that's to where we're going to turn right now.

We're going to look at two big questions

or two big statements.

Here's the first one.

What has Jesus to say about same-sex marriage?

What does Jesus have to say?

Not what I say,

not what politicians say.

What does Jesus say?

So, what does he have to say?

Well, nothing.

Jesus mentions or never mentions same-sex marriage.

But, he does have something to say about sex and marriage.

What does he have to say?

Well, listen.

First, sexual immorality.

Have a look at Matthew chapter 15.

Matthew 15 · chapter mention

Matthew chapter 15.

Matthew 15 · chapter mention

We're going to be looking at a few different chapters in Matthew.

So, if you've got your Bibles there,

please open to Matthew chapter 15.

Matthew 15 · chapter mention

And I encourage you to take down any notes or any questions.

And if there's anything you want to talk about afterwards or raise on Wednesday,

that would be a great time to do it.

So, Matthew 15 verse 18.

Matthew 15:18

Familiar words?

Matthew 15 verse 18.

Matthew 15:18

Now, here Jesus is talking about the different behaviours that make us unacceptable before God.

Now, here Jesus is talking about the different behaviours that make us unacceptable before God.

And the phrase there in the middle, sexual immorality is a catch-all term for any distortion on God's design for sex.

So, it includes things like pornography, adultery, premarital sex, prostitution, same-sex, or any distortion or forced sex within heterosexual marriage.

So, in one statement, Jesus is saying, we are all sexually flawed.

Every single one of us.

But notice, he's not just talking about sexual immorality.

He includes things like evil thoughts, slander, false testimony.

In other words, Jesus is setting a standard before every single person that we all fail to achieve, married or not.

You see, it's not just the area of marriage that we need to get right.

Jesus is saying, it's actually bigger than that.

What we need to get right is our whole life.

We need to get our hearts right.

Look at verse 19.

For it's out of the heart that come all of these things.

So, it's not just about defining marriage.

Jesus is saying, it's much bigger.

We need to get our hearts in order.

But Jesus does have something to say about marriage.

Have a look at Matthew 19.

Matthew 19.

And verse 3.

Matthew 19, verse 3.

Matthew 19:3

Some Pharisees came.

They were coming to trick Jesus.

So, some Pharisees came to him to test him.

They asked, is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?

So, the Jews at the time had an understanding that a husband could actually divorce his wife for very petty things like not producing a good dinner.

That was the way their laws worked.

So, verse 4.

Haven't you read?

He replied that at the beginning the creator made them male and female and said, for this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife and the two will become one flesh.

So, they are no longer two but one.

Therefore, what God has joined together, let man not separate.

Now, the primary issue here is about divorce.

That's what the question is.

But as Jesus addresses it, he defines clearly what marriage is.

So, three things under this.

First, we see that marriage is initiated and provided by God.

So, look at verse 4.

Jesus takes us right back to the beginning.

He says, haven't you read, he replied, that at the beginning the creator.

He takes us right back to Genesis 1 and Genesis 2 which he quotes from.

So, he's saying right up front, marriage is not man's idea.

It's the creator's idea.

Marriage is a gift from God to people.

It's not something that we invent and that we decide what's right or what's wrong.

It's something initiated and provided for by God.

Second thing, marriage, he says, is the union of one man and one woman.

So, let's read verse 4 again.

He says, at the beginning the creator made them male and female and said, for this reason a man will leave his father and mother.

And be united to his wife and they will become one flesh.

So, marriage is about one male and one female.

They leave their father a male and they leave their mother a female and they become one flesh.

It's two people of the opposite sex that define marriage.

Now, the fact that we are created as men or as women means we have this relationship called marriage.

Marriage exists because we are sexually different.

Because we are made differently, we have the marriage institution.

So, marriage is clearly defined by the union of one man and one woman.

The third thing under this that Jesus has to say is that the only alternative to heterosexual marriage is singleness.

The only alternative to heterosexual marriage is singleness.

So, as Jesus goes on to talk with the Pharisees about what it is to be faithful,

what it is to live in a lifelong committed marriage relationships,

it makes the disciples a little bit uneasy about marriage.

So, look what they have to say in verse 10.

The disciples said to him,

if this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry.

In other words, the standard that Jesus sets is so high,

he said, what if we can't actually live up to this standard?

Then what are we to do?

So, look how Jesus answers.

He starts talking about celibacy or singleness.

So, verse 11.

Jesus replied,

Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given.

For some are eunuchs or some are celibate,

because they were born that way.

Others were made that way by men.

Others have renounced marriage.

In other words, Jesus is saying,

if we are not in a heterosexual marriage,

the only alternative to that is singleness.

Jesus doesn't say to the disciples,

look, if that marriage doesn't work out with that person

and it's not going so well,

well, you can go and marry somebody else.

Or he doesn't say,

if your orientation is same-sex attraction,

then go find somebody of the same sex and marry them.

No, he doesn't say any of that.

He says, look,

singleness is the only godly alternative

to heterosexual marriage.

So, Jesus does have something to say about sex and marriage,

and it challenges every single one of us.

It's not just about same-sex marriage.

It's not just about heterosexual marriage.

It's much deeper than that.

It's about our sexuality,

and as we have seen from Matthew 15,

we are all sexually flawed.

None of us live life as God intends.

Every one of us,

whether we identify as gay or straight,

whether we are married or single,

we all need God to change our hearts on the inside,

to clean us up,

so that we live life His way.

But Jesus says something else about marriage

that is more important

than the marriage relationships

that we may find in this life.

This is the third thing He says about marriage.

Have a look at Matthew chapter 22.

Matthew 22 · chapter mention

Matthew 22.

Here's another group of religious leaders.

We have the Pharisees,

and here's the Sadducees.

If you want to know the difference about them,

you can ask me afterwards.

And here they're trying to catch Jesus out

with another question.

And they're asking about,

well, what about marriage in heaven,

or what about marriage in the afterlife?

What about that?

So, Matthew chapter 22, verse 24.

Matthew 22:24

They come up with this scenario.

Teacher, they said, verse 24,

Moses told us that if a man dies without having children,

his brother must marry the widow

and have children for him.

Now, they say,

there were seven brothers among us.

The first one married and died,

and since he had no children,

he left his wife to his brother.

The same thing happened to the second and third brother,

right on down to the seventh.

Finally, the woman died.

Now then, here's the question.

So, she's married seven times

to seven different people.

They're all brothers.

Now then, at the resurrection,

at the end of life,

whose wife will she be of the seven

since all of them were married to her?

Hmm, good question.

Will she have seven husbands in heaven?

Or does she just have one?

And which one is she going to pick?

What's the answer going to be?

Well, look what Jesus says, verse 29.

Jesus replied,

You are in error

because you do not know the scriptures

or the power of God.

At the resurrection,

at the end of time,

people will neither marry

nor be given in marriage.

Look, says Jesus,

there's something that is much more important

than marriage in this life.

In fact, our married relationships

are all temporary.

What's important is not whether we marry,

but what we will be like.

Look at the end of verse 30.

He says they'll neither marry

nor be given in marriage.

They will be like the angels in heaven.

That is, we will become pure.

However, the intimacy and joy

of human relationships

will be replaced by a new kind of relationship,

an ultimate relationship with God

that the angels now enjoy

with God in heaven.

That is what's important.

Verse 31.

But he continues,

but about the resurrection of the dead.

Have you not read what God said to you?

I am the God of Abraham,

the God of Isaac,

and the God of Jacob.

He is not the God of the dead,

but the God of the living.

Jesus is reminding them

that God is the one

who enters into a permanent,

faithful covenant with his people.

That quote there in verse 32

is this covenant God

who comes to his people

who said,

I am the God of Abraham.

I am the eternal,

living God

who enters into

a relationship

with my people,

into that ultimate

married relationship.

You see,

the problem with this

marriage referendum is

it's so short-sighted.

It's not about

same-sex marriage.

It's not about

heterosexual marriage.

It's about eternity.

It's about the ultimate,

eternal marriage

between God

and his people.

That's where every marriage

is headed.

So the question is,

not what our view of marriage,

but am I,

and are you,

are we ready

to meet God?

we can have marriage

right,

we can have our definition

right,

but are our hearts

right?

That's the real issue.

You see,

the big thing,

if we can just take this away,

is that Jesus

has been saying

through these different passages

we've looked at so far,

listen,

we are all

sexually flawed.

Our hearts

are all broken.

But get this,

we are so loved,

we are infinitely loved

by God.

So much so

that he sent his son,

the Lord Jesus Christ,

who gave up

all of his rights.

The only one

who did have rights.

He gave up

all of his rights

to come and serve

people like you

and me,

to take on

all our impurities,

to become

and to be treated

as if he

was sexually flawed,

so that we might

have his purity

be accepted

and welcomed

into the ultimate

marriage relationship

with God,

to know him

and enjoy him.

That's the big issue.

And we can go on

and on about

defining and saying,

get this,

get this,

but as Christian people,

our role is to

point towards

Jesus

and the relationship

that we can have

with him

and what it means

to live life

under him.

So that's what

Jesus has to say

about same-sex marriage.

The second thing

that we're going

to look at

is what Jesus

has to say

about children's rights.

You see,

in this referendum,

it's not just about

adults saying,

it's my right

to get married.

It's about

the rights

of children

or perhaps

ignoring the rights

of children.

Have a look back

at Matthew 19.

Matthew 19

and verse 13.

So this comes

just after

the teaching

on marriage

that we looked at

just a moment ago.

And in Matthew 19

Matthew 19:13

verse 13

we read this,

Then little children

were brought

to Jesus

for him

to place

his hands

on them

and pray

for them.

But the disciples

rebuked those

who brought them.

Now,

we might get

a bit surprised

there at the reaction

of the disciples.

Why are the disciples

telling all the parents

who are bringing

all the children,

take them away?

You shouldn't be here

is basically

what's going on.

We don't want

any kids around here.

Why would the disciples

react like this?

Well,

we must remember

that children

in the first century

had no rights

or status.

At very best,

they were to be seen

and not heard.

In fact,

under Roman law,

a father

had the right

to kill his child

if they displeased him

or were unwanted.

So children

in the first century

were legally sold

and used as slaves.

That was allowed

to happen.

That was in the laws.

So children

had no rights

and they had no laws

to protect them.

So the disciples

at this point

are expressing

something of the culture

that has begun

to shape them.

It's wrong,

but they're only expressing

what they have been

shaped by.

Jesus, however,

challenges

and confronts

the culture

of the day.

So look at verse 14.

Jesus said,

Let the little children

come to me

and do not hinder them

for the kingdom of heaven

belongs to such

as these.

Jesus is making

a bold statement

to the culture

and the people

of his time.

Children are

of equal value

and worth.

They are welcomed

and accepted.

And we have to change it

is what he is saying.

And it was because

of that very teaching

of Jesus

that the Christian community

in the first century

were the first people

who were known

for rescuing

and protecting

vulnerable children

and adopting them

into their own families.

They would make it

their business

to go and take

the children

that the Roman fathers

would want to get rid of

and take them in.

And it's this teaching

that has shaped

many of our laws since.

Interestingly,

our Minister for Health,

Leo Varadkar,

although this is speaking

back in 2010,

who has since identified

himself as gay,

said this.

He says,

Every child

has the right

to a mother and father

and as much as possible

the state should vindicate

that right.

That is a more important right

than that of two men

or two women

having a family.

That is the principle

that should underline

our laws

regarding children

and adoption.

So the rights

of children

matter.

In fact,

they have a right

to a mum

and dad.

You see,

the teaching of Jesus

is affirmed

and built upon

as you go through

the New Testament.

The Apostle Paul

consistently writes

about children's relationship

to a mother and father.

In Ephesians chapter 6,

Ephesians 6 · chapter mention

have a look there

if you like,

Ephesians chapter 6

Ephesians 6:1–3

verses 1 to 3.

Ephesians 6

Ephesians 6:1–3

verses 1 to 3.

So this is all

being built upon

what Jesus has said,

what Jesus had built upon

from what God had said

in the Old Testament.

So chapter 6

verse 1.

Children,

obey your parents

in the Lord

for this is right.

Well,

who are the parents?

Verse 2,

honour your father

and mother

which is the first commandment

and it has a promise.

And here's the promise,

that it may go well

with you

and that you may

enjoy long life

on the earth.

Now isn't it interesting

you're saying,

look,

there's a design here.

This is what family life

is to be like.

Children

in a family

as far as possible

with a mum and dad.

Why?

Because it's going to be

best for them.

You see,

a family consisting

of a mum and dad

is the best environment

for a child

to be raised.

UNICEF,

the worldwide organisation

protecting the rights

of children,

make it abundantly clear

what is best

for the development

and care

of children.

and this comes

from their

early childhood

development studies.

Child development,

they say,

is largely influenced

by the family structure

in which a child

is raised.

Children living

without their mothers

or fathers

or without both

biological parents

are at special risk

of being denied

the care they need

for their physical

and psychological

well-being.

So it's not just

a biblical idea,

it's seen in practice

that that's what's right

and what's best.

Biological parents

are the best.

But let's be real

about this.

Sometimes

our biological parents

are not always

the best parents

and sometimes

they're not always

able to care

for their children.

So sometimes

it is best

and loving

for those children

to be cared for

and to be provided

for by another family.

But that should,

as far as possible,

be a mum

and a dad.

Because if we get it wrong,

then it leads

to all kinds

of terrible experiences.

Listen to this.

This past week

an actress in England

told of her experience

being raised

by her biological mother

and her mum's gay partner.

This is what she said,

far from being

a healthy,

nurturing state

of affairs,

this arrangement

where I was caught

in a destructive,

triangular battle

for my mother's affection

with another woman

while forced

to watch helplessly

as my father

was emasculated

and airbrushed

from our lives

was simultaneously

damaging

and confusing.

So that is

the experience

of one child

in the home

that they were raised.

But the implications

are further.

A website

that I encourage you

to look up

and check out,

Mothers and Fathers Matter.

It's an organisation

campaigning

on the no side

and they spell out

very clearly

what it would mean

if the referendum

is accepted.

It says,

the right

to found

a family

will become

a constitutional

right of any

two men

or two women.

What will that mean?

Well,

for two men

they will be

legally entitled

to seek out

a surrogate.

Two women

on the other side

will have the legal

right to seek

a sperm donation

and create a child.

That means

the child

themselves,

the child

who is born

will have

zero identifying

information

until they reach

the years,

until they reach

18 years old.

So an entire

childhood

will have passed

before their

true identity

and genetic

heritage

can be revealed

to them.

Now that has

medical

consequences

as well

because there may

be something

hereditary

from their

biological parents

that now

they know

nothing about

because they are

now living

with somebody else

and they can't

be told about it.

Not to say

anything of the

psychological damage

that it may cause.

Now from my

understanding

of what all

that means is

that children

just become

made to order.

They are not

only denied

a mother and

father,

they are denied

knowing who

their actual

biological parents

are.

So just as

Jesus sought

to set out

at the very

beginning

the rights

of children

and to

protect them,

so we should

also be on

the side of

protecting the

rights of

children because

the unborn

can't protect

themselves.

So those are

the two big

things that

Jesus has to

say about

marriage and

about the

rights of

children.

So where

does this

leave us

leave us

all?

Well I

want to

encourage you

to vote

no.

Primarily

because of

what Jesus

has to say

about marriage

and the

rights of

children.

But that

does not

mean by

voting no

we have to

somehow choose

between loving

and opposing.

We mustn't

split that.

We must

do both.

love.

And I want

to stress

this as

people.

We should

be loving

to all

people and

welcoming of

all regardless

of their

relationship

status whether

they are

married or

single.

We should

be people

who are at

the forefront

of protecting

the rights

of all

people whatever

their gender

or orientation.

it is the

Christian

community who

should be

saying you

have the

right to

say what

you want

to say.

You have

the right to

freedom of

speech and

declare what

your interests

and desires

are.

That is what

we should be

protecting and

we should do

it lovingly but

at the same

time opposing

with gentleness

and care any

change to

God's good

design for

marriage and

the family.

loving to

all but

gently opposing

any change

to God's

good design

for marriage

and family.

Let's pray

together.

this is the

prayer of the

apostle Paul.

He says let

your conversation

be always

full of

grace

seasoned

with salt

so that

you may

know how

to answer

everyone.

Father we

ask that

for each

one of us

here

that we

would be

able to

clearly

explain our

reasons

but that we

would also be

able to

explain the

hope that

we have

that there

is something

of far

greater

significance

and consequence

than our

earthly

relationships

relationships

or our

married

relationships

but the

ultimate

marriage

relationship

to come

between God

and his

people

in the

new heavens

and the

new earth.

Father would

you please

forgive us

for we are

all sexually

flawed

we have all

messed up

would you

please

forgive us

would you

cleanse us

afresh

and would

you please

by the

power of

your Holy

Spirit

help us

to live

life

as you

call us

to

protecting

every

marriage

relationship

here

protecting

every

family

unit

here

and that

together

as a

church

family

we would

be loving

and caring

and welcoming

of all

who would

come

we pray

that you

would help

us to do

this well

in Jesus

name we

ask

amen