Love is

So I have been looking forward to today and praying for you.

It's been great to meet some of you already.

It's been exciting to hear about what God's doing here and in your collection of churches.

So I want to speak to you this morning about love and particularly love is the mark of holiness.

Actually, I think I have a lot to learn about loving others.

But God's taught me some things from his word, my experience, and I want to share those this morning.

So if you would, would you open up with me to the book of 1 Corinthians?

I'll give you the page number.

If you have one of the church Bibles, it's 1 Corinthians 13 and it begins on page 1153.

Many of you will know that this is the well-known chapter on love.

So why don't you follow along as I read it for us.

I'm going to read all of chapter 13.

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge,

and if I have faith that can move mountains but have not love, I'm nothing.

If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient.

Love is kind.

It does not envy.

It does not boast.

It's not proud.

It's not rude.

It's not self-seeking.

It's not easily angered.

It keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails, but when there are prophecies, they will cease.

Where there are tongues, they will be stilled.

Where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when the perfect comes, the imperfect disappears.

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child.

When I became a man, I put away childish ways behind me.

Now we see but a poor reflection as in the mirror.

Then we shall see face to face.

Now I know in part.

Then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain, faith, hope, and love.

But the greatest of these is love.

Why don't we just pray for a moment again.

Father, we thank you for the time that we've had already,

the encouragement of singing your word and being together.

Father, and God, we pray that you would graciously meet us with your spirit right now.

Lord, we pray that our own hearts would be filled with love for you

and reminded and instructed in how our calling is to love you and to love one another.

So help us towards that end, Father.

Help us to think about our own lives

and what that really should look like in the course of everyday life.

And God, we pray, give us minds and hearts right now that are focused on you

and see the things that you say in your word to us.

We pray this in Christ's name.

Amen.

Amen.

Before we just jump in and look at the text,

I want to spend a few minutes saying something that I hope will be helpful

as we think about what it looks like

and how we should be thinking about loving one another.

God often uses the small, ordinary, everyday events of life

to work in us, to change us,

to show us the greater degrees that we need to grow in love.

Don't you think that?

I was just mentioning a few minutes ago

that I'm slowly renovating my home.

And I do mean slowly.

My wife would say very slowly.

Ella, my five-year-old daughter's bedroom,

is the most recent part of our house that we've renovated.

The thing that I did before that was the bathroom,

which sort of abuts to her room.

And to do all the work on the plumbing,

I had to basically break down half of her room.

And she went back in her room.

There are all kinds of pipes and things exposed.

So she was in there, and the plaster was falling off,

and there's pipes everywhere.

And that was her room.

So that was the room that had to get renovated next.

And so night after night,

slowly over the course of a few months,

whenever I'd have time,

I would go in and put up new walls and new ceiling

and strip all the molding.

And I put up new crown.

And then I painted all of her furniture.

And I painted her room.

And finally, after a long time,

her room was complete.

And it was just the kind of clean, bright room

that any five-year-old girl, I think, would love to have.

So the night after I finished her room,

we had two of our close family friends over.

And those two family friends of you are smiling already.

You know where this story's going.

But they had three little girls,

my little girl Ella's age.

And they went up,

and they played in her room all night.

And I just thought, how fantastic.

You know, I finished her room,

and they'd usually be all around.

And they just were able to play there for the whole night.

It was just great.

And then at one point in the night,

we were sitting, the three couples,

around our dinner table.

And Ella and her three friends came down

in their, like, most beautiful little princess gowns.

And they had taken hand lotion

and slathered it all over their hair.

And they came walking down the stairs,

and we're, like, horrified looking at them.

They think they're looking all cute and twirling around.

We're sort of trying to hide our horror.

And it was kind of a hint

about what was happening up in that room.

I should have clued in at that moment.

Anyway, the night came to an end,

and we said goodbye to our friends

and walked them out the door.

And I took little Ella back up to her room

to say goodnight.

Now, remember, I've been working on this room

for, like, three months.

I'm a little bit of a perfectionist,

so I had it just how I wanted every last bit.

And I walk in,

and on the pristine baseboards and furniture

is bright blue little girl nail polish everywhere.

And beside it was cleaning products,

so they must have realized what they did

and tried to clean it.

And I thought, oh, Ella,

and frustration and anger and annoyance,

all the things that can so easily well up

in these ordinary, everyday moments.

Or when we grow in love and holiness,

we slowly start to respond differently

to those times, don't we?

I think there's some symbolism in that

for you and for me.

During, as I think about my own renovation,

you know, the day-to-day work of renovating

happens so slowly,

and often you don't really see the progress, right?

Or you might come into a room,

and unless you knew what had happened

underneath all the walls

and where you started from,

it doesn't look like very much has happened.

And I think our sanctification

and our growth in love often looks that way.

You can kind of just take a snapshot of a moment

and feel maybe like you're stuck in the same place,

when really, even though it's been maybe imperceptibly

and you can't see it on a day-to-day basis,

but you truly have actually been growing

in love as time has gone on.

And then after some time has gone on,

one day you sort of turn around

and you kind of do see some of that great work

that God's been doing in your life,

and you no longer have to go into the house

and redo every room.

God's done some great renovating work

in your life and your heart,

and that's encouraging, I think.

There's a part in James

that I've been reflecting on

over the last number of months

where James addresses in his letter,

in chapter 4,

these Christians that have just really

not been loving God the way that they should.

And maybe that's how,

that's where you find your own heart today,

perhaps,

that there's a sense that you haven't been loving God

the way that you want,

and you feel that particularly

in how your own heart

isn't as warm in love for others.

And what James says to those very people

in his letter is,

but God gives more grace.

I love that part of James.

You've been far from God.

You feel far from Him.

You haven't loved Him the way that you should.

You don't deserve His grace,

but He gives more grace.

I think that's

such an encouraging thing to think about

as we think about

how we want to grow in love.

So,

with the hopefulness of God's promise

of grace in mind,

let's turn our thoughts back

to this text in 1 Corinthians now.

So we're going to dive in in a moment.

I just read it for us.

I've got a question for you

about this.

How many of you have been to a wedding?

It's a pretty innocuous question,

so don't be afraid to raise your hand.

How many of you have been to a wedding?

You don't have to commit too much

to say you've been to a wedding.

How many of you have been to a wedding

where 1 Corinthians 13

has been read or preached?

Okay,

they do that here too.

That's good.

And why not?

It's lovely.

It's poetic.

It's beautiful.

But when I read 1 Corinthians 13,

did you hear anything

about romantic love or marriage?

No.

No.

I think this passage

and what God says through its words

have some very important things

to say to us,

but we will have trouble seeing them

if we don't realize

that this passage

is not actually about,

in the first place,

romantic love.

So I want to show you

just for a moment

that it's not about love

and actually what it is about.

So you can actually see

in this translation,

if you look at the verse

that comes right before chapter 13,

it's actually set in

in this paragraph.

It's verse,

the end of chapter 12.

Paul says right here,

before he gets to chapter 13,

and now I will show you

the most excellent way

or the more excellent way.

This is what Paul says

he's going to go on to do

in chapter 13.

It's pretty clear

that he's saying that

love is this most excellent way,

but more excellent than what?

What's the context?

Well, if you look back

in the beginning of chapter 12

with me to verse 1,

Paul begins this chapter

that leads into chapter 13

saying,

now about spiritual gifts, brothers.

The context here really

is spiritual gifts.

And the context in the church

in Corinth

was that there were

certain people

that had gifts,

spiritual gifts,

particularly the gift

of speaking in tongues

that thought that

because they had that gift,

they were the ones

that were more important,

more valuable,

and that everyone else,

frankly,

that didn't have that gift

was maybe not so important.

So Paul writes to them

in chapter 12

and says,

no, you know what?

Actually,

God's very intentionally

designed the church

in a way

where he's given different gifts

to different Christians

and he's done that

because that's what's required

to build up the church.

So God's done that on purpose

because all of those gifts

are necessary

for the edification

and the upbuilding

of the church.

So what does Paul mean

when he says,

I will show you

a more excellent way?

He's making some kind

of comparison

between spiritual gifts

and love.

But if you look again

at verse 31,

even just before

where we read there,

the beginning of verse 31,

Paul says,

but eagerly desire

the greater gifts.

So right up to the passage

we're looking at,

Paul's been explaining

how there are

these greater gifts.

He gives this list

in verse 27

of how God first gave

apostles

and then prophets

and then teachers

and last tongues.

Later on in chapter 14,

he talks about how

the gift of tongues

is one thing

because it edifies yourself,

but prophecy

is greater

because of how

it builds up

other people.

And the Corinthians

had fallen into thinking

that if you had

those gifts

that were more miraculous,

more showy,

that put you up front,

those were the really

important gifts.

And if you had those,

man,

you were really spiritual.

And Paul says,

no, you're wrong.

Those gifts are important.

All gifts are important.

And there are

greater gifts,

but the greater gifts

aren't the showy gifts.

It's the gifts

that do the most

in terms of

building other people up.

That's what makes

a gift great.

So he says,

earnestly desire

those gifts,

but,

then verse 31,

I will still show you

a more excellent way.

So all that's to say

the contrast

that Paul's making here

as we get into

chapter 13

is he's saying,

more important

than all spiritual gifts,

even the greatest ones,

is love.

More important

than all spiritual gifts

is love.

So we're going to look

at chapter 13

and here's what

I want you to know

and how I want you

to be thinking about it.

This chapter really answers

the question,

how do you live

a worthy,

godly,

holy,

Christian life?

And the context

has already been set out

that a meaningful,

valuable,

God-honoring life

that's worthy

of the gospel

is one that

builds up the church,

that uses your gifts

and your life

to edify others,

to bless others,

and to build them up,

that loves the Christians

well around you,

that edifies

and encourages

and comforts.

And then Paul comes

to chapter 13

in that context

and he says,

I'm going to give you

the answer

of how you first

and foremost

live that worthy life

that builds

other people up

and the way

that you do that

first and foremost

is through love.

That's what Paul

is explaining here

in chapter 13.

So we're going to look

at three realities

about love

that we need to learn

about today.

Love's importance,

love's character,

and love's nature.

Paul talks about

love's importance

in verse 1 through 3

and that's really

the heart

of this whole passage.

He's going to say

some other things

but they all really

are to this great point

that that church

and we would feel

just how important

love is

for our lives

as Christians.

That's verse 1 through 3,

love's importance.

And then in 4 through 7

love's character.

Then 8 through 13

love's nature.

So how important

is love?

I just said a minute ago

that love is

the reality

that really makes

a Christian life worthy.

So was that rhetorical

or was that

stretching it a bit?

How important

is love

for your life?

Think about that.

Let's see what

Paul says here

in verse 1 through 3

about love's importance.

Let me read it

for us again.

If I speak

in the tongues

of men

and of angels

but have not love,

I am only

a resounding gong

or a clanging cymbal.

If I have the gift

of prophecy

and can fathom

all mysteries

and all knowledge

and if I have a faith

that can move mountains

but have not love,

I am nothing.

If I give all

I possess

to the poor

and surrender

my body

to the flames

but have not love,

I gain nothing.

So let's imagine

for a second

that I have

the gift of tongues

and we'll just

for example's sake

assume that

that's some kind

of unknown

human language

that I know

that I have

that ability

to speak in

and on top

of that

I have some kind

of majestic

angelic gift

I can somehow

speak in the language

of angels.

Pretty helpful.

Imagine,

it certainly is

if you would think

about how it would

work out

so you're the guy

that I came

and I shared

the gospel with

in your own

native language

right?

And I've never

learned your language

but because of

the gift of tongues

I was able to

share the gospel

with you

in a language

that you understood

even though I

never learned it

and you came

to faith

pretty helpful

right?

It certainly

was for that

foreigner that

would have come

to faith

but Paul says

but if you don't

have love

even if you

can do that

you're still

nothing.

You're like

a clanging

cymbal

or

empty

ringing

brass

like a brass

shield

clinking

off the ground

or resounding

brass

just things

that sound

hollow

and tinny.

So you have

these incredible

gifts

genuinely

incredible

but don't

have love

what are you?

Paul says

it's empty

and hollow

and notice

he doesn't

actually say

the gifts

are empty

and hollow

he says

I am hollow

I am empty.

Or he moves

on

he gives

a second

example

he says

what if

you have

prophetic

powers?

He's already

talked about

in this

letter

about how

genuinely

edifying

prophecy

was.

He says

not only

do you

have

prophecy

but you

know

all mystery

and all

knowledge

so you

just know

it all

you understand

all of

God's

ways

his plan

our

lives

sanctification

so you

know

someone

experiences

great

tragedy

maybe

they

lose

someone

under

really

difficult

circumstances

and they

come to

you

and you

know

exactly

what to

say

and how

to

counsel

them

you

have

all

mystery

and all

knowledge

and on

top of

that

you

have

great

faith

this

deep

faith

faith

that

proverbially

can

move

a mountain

like

Jesus

had once

talked

about

so

faith

that

can

inspire

a

generation

of

Christians

you

have

all

of

that

but

Paul

says

but

if

you

don't

have

love

you're

nothing

no matter

how much

good

you can

do

it

doesn't

count

for

anything

in

God's

sight

and he

gets to

the last

example

which I

think is

so

powerful

here

he

says

what

if

you

give

away

everything

you

have

or

if

like

this

translation

renders

it

what

if

you

give

up

your

body

to

be

burned

right

you're

you know

honey

I

was

on

the

way

home

and

I

met

this

guy

and

he

said

they

just

don't

have

what

they

need

so

I

gave

him

my

entire

paycheck

for

the

month

or

you

know

if

you

don't

recant

you're

going

to be

burned

at

the

stake

and

you

don't

recant

and

you

are

burned

at

the

stake

for

your

faith

and

surely

those

things

in

themselves

have

to

have

some

kind

of

there

has

to

be

some

kind

of

honor

in

those

actions

just

in

themselves

because

of

their

very

nature

but

Paul

says

even

if

you

do

that

and

you

don't

have

love

you

actually

gain

nothing

it's

not

worthy

in

God's

eyes

he

doesn't

see it

as

pleasing

he's

not

going

to

reward

for

it

D.A.

Carson

if you

know

that

name

a

Bible

scholar

says

if

Paul

were

addressing

the

modern

church

perhaps

he

would

extrapolate

further

and

say

you

know

you

Christians

who

prove

your

spirituality

by

the

amount

of

theological

knowledge

that

you

can

cram

in

your

heads

I

tell

you

that

such

knowledge

by

itself

proves

nothing

or

you

who

affirm

the

spirit's

presence

in

your

meetings

because

there's

a certain

style

of

worship

whatever

that

style

is

if

your

patterns

are not

expressions

of

love

it's

spiritually

bankrupt

so

how

important

is

love

without

love

theological

knowledge

all

kinds

of

personal

dedication

to

God

eloquent

sermons

all

the

service

that

you

do

all

the

sacrifice

if

it's

not

driven

by

love

Paul

says

it's

empty

it's

not

what

it

should

be

that

same

scholar

D.A.

Carson

says

when you

look at

the

five

scenarios

here

about

gifts

and

sacrifice

compared

to

love

according

to

divine

mathematics

five

minus

one

equals

zero

another

brother

said

everything

minus

love

equals

nothing

everything

minus

love

equals

nothing

D.L.

Moody

says

there's

no use

to do

church

work

without

love

a doctor

a lawyer

they may

do

good

work

without

love

but

God's

work

can't

be

done

without

love

now

I think

that's

profoundly

convicting

on one

level

how many

things

have we

done

that haven't

been done

from love

out of

pride

or

whatever

selfishness

or

just

sometimes

very

mere

duty

just

let the

reality

and the

weight

of that

settle

for a

minute

everything

minus

love

equals

nothing

but

here's

what's

also

so

especially

good

I think

about

this

news

now

are you

somebody

at times

that

wonders

how your

life will

count

for much

maybe

you don't

think

you're

particularly

gifted

listen

what God

says

through

Paul

here

is that

if you

grow

in love

if you

grow

in love

your

life

will

count

more

in

God's

eyes

than

if you

had

every

gift

and

ability

it's

amazing

if you

grow

in love

your

life

can

do

others

more

good

than

if you

had

other

gifts

that

you

don't

have

God

will

take

your

life

and

the

gifts

that

you

do

have

and

do

more

good

to

people

than

you

could

have

ever

imagined

if

you

just

grow

in

love

you

think

what

we

do

sometimes

is

small

and

unimportant

right

all

kinds

of

things

seem

that

way

through

the

course

of

life

whether

it's

being

a

mom

at

home

or

smaller

things

that

we

do

in

the

course

of

church

life

Jonathan

Edwards

says

God

delights

in

little

things

when

they

spring

from

sincere

love

to

himself

a

cup

of

cold

water

given

to

a

disciple

and

sincere

love

is

worth

more

in

God's

sight

than

all

one's

goods

given

to

the

poor

even

the

wealth

of

a

kingdom

given

away

or

a

body

offered

up

that's

actually

what

1 Corinthians

says

isn't

it

I

think

these

verses

in

some

ways

cut

through

a lot

of

the

complexities

of

things

that

are

very

complex

right

where

where do

we

pour

our

time

and

energy

in

as

Christians

where

there

can be

so many

layers

sometimes

to the

Christian

life

and

thinking

about

what

God

wants

us

to

do

and

how

we

should

live

our

lives

the

answer

in

one

sense

to

that

is

always

to

pursue

love

so

how

important

is

love

everything

minus

love

equals

nothing

but

you

add

a

little

love

in

front

of

even

the

smallest

of

sacrifices

and

service

and

immediately

it

has

value

that's

what

this

text

says

now

that's

all

in

verse

one

through

three

and

Paul

doesn't

stray

very

far

from

this

in

fact

like

I

was

saying

before

this

is

really

the

heart

of

what

he

wants

us

to

hear

but

he's

going

to

go

on

and

he's

going

to

talk

a

little

bit

about

the

character

of

love

and

he's

going

to

do

that

not

just

in

sort

of

like

an

abstract

fashion

he's

talking

very

love

for

this

church

he's

thinking

about

all

the

different

areas

that

they're

struggling

in

their

love

particularly

in

terms

of

spiritual

gifts

and

he

sets

out

this

description

of

love

for

them

so

it's

very

much

contextual

and

it's

not

comprehensive

but

it's

still

very

helpful

for

us

I

think

because

we

struggle

with

the

same

kinds

of

things

and

have

the

same

issues

below

our

particular

struggles

with

loving

people

as

this

church

did

so

I

want

to

read

this

description

for

us

again

and

secondly

think

with

you

about

love's

character

for a

moment

here

so

after

Paul

makes

this

initial

point

about

how

important

love

is

he

gets

to

verse

4

through

7

and

he

gives

this

description

of

love's

character

and

he

says

love

is

patient

love

is

kind

it

does

not

envy

it

does

not

boast

it

is

not

proud

it

is

not

rude

it

is

not

self

seeking

it

is

not

easily

angered

it

keeps

no

record

of

wrongs

love

does

not

delight

in

evil

but

rejoices

with

the

truth

it

always

protects

always

trusts

always

hopes

always

perseveres

these

descriptions

basically

have

three

parts

it

begins

with

this

sort

of

two

positive

expressions

about

love

at the

beginning

about

how

love

is

patient

and

how

love

is

kind

and

then

he

gives

eight

little

short

descriptions

about

what

love

is

not

or

what

love

doesn't

do

or

the

attitude

that

it

doesn't

have

and

then

he

finishes

off

with

these

four

similar

descriptions

about

how

love

does

these

in

all

things

and

he

picks up

on

those

cardinal

Christian

areas

of

faith

and

hope

and

then

he

comes

back

to

right

where

he

started

back

at

how

love

is

patient

and

enduring

John

Piper

says

when

you

try to

group

all

these

15

into

categories

basically

what we

see

is

descriptions

about

how

love

is

patient

and

it

endures

and

about

how

love

is

not

proud

I

think

about

that

do

those

describe

us

we

think

about

our

lives

our

life

within

our

home

and

our

church

think

about

the

things

we

say

and

don't

say

and

do

and

don't

do

here's

what

God

says

must

characterize

our

interaction

for them

to be

loving

you

must

be

patient

first

of

all

not

expecting

things

to go

your

way

or

feeling

justified

when

they

don't

to

be

angry

or

frustrated

or

annoyed

but

just

the

opposite

actually

expecting

that

there

will

be

things

obstacles

hard

things

and

because

of

that

being

ready

to

suffer

those

things

to

be

long

suffering

and

patient

not

going

home

with

kids

and

expecting

everything

to

go

okay

right

because

it

doesn't

but

being

ready

that

that's

that's

what

we

signed

up

for

you

must

not

be

or

you

must

be

kind

secondly

treat

other

people

with

the

same

kind

of

understanding