Proverbs Ch5v1-23 - Wise Sex

Thank you.

Proverbs chapter 5.

Proverbs 5 · chapter mention

Proverbs chapter 5.

Proverbs 5 · chapter mention

Proverbs chapter 5.

Proverbs 5 · chapter mention

Proverbs chapter 5.

Proverbs 5 · chapter mention

Proverbs chapter 5.

Proverbs 5 · chapter mention

Proverbs chapter 5.

Proverbs 5 · chapter mention

her steps lead straight to the grave.

She gives no thought to the way of life.

Her paths wander aimlessly

but she does not know it.

Now then, my sons,

listen to me.

Do not turn aside from what I say.

Keep to a path far from her.

Do not go near the door of her house

lest you lose your honour to others

and your dignity to one who is cruel.

Lest strangers feast on your wealth

and your toil enrich the house of another.

At the end of your life

you will groan

when your flesh and body are spent.

You will say,

how I hated discipline.

How my heart spurned correction.

I would not obey my teachers

or turn my ear to my instructors.

And I was soon in serious trouble

in the assembly of God's people.

Drink water from your own cistern.

Running water from your own well.

Should your springs overflow in the streets?

Your streams of water in the public squares?

Let them be yours alone.

Never to be shared with strangers.

May your fountain be blessed.

And may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.

A loving doe.

A graceful deer.

May her breast satisfy you always.

May you ever be intoxicated with her love.

Why, my son,

be intoxicated with another man's wife?

Why embrace the bosom of a wayward woman?

For your ways are in full view of the Lord.

And he examines all your paths.

The evil deeds of the wicked ensnare them.

The cords of their sins hold them fast.

For lack of discipline,

they will die,

led astray

by their own great folly.

Well,

a serious text.

Let's pray

and ask for God's help.

Father,

as we look at your word today,

would you help me to carefully

and truthfully

speak and declare it?

Would you also guard us

from digging up our past

where things have already been forgiven and dealt with?

May we rejoice and know

that they are forgiven.

And yet,

if there are things that we need to address today

in our own personal lives,

would you gently work in us

by your spirit

leading us

to Christ?

Help us, we pray.

Amen.

Amen.

A man dressed in a suit

sits down to dinner

after a busy day.

An elegant lady

walks towards him,

brushing against his shoulder.

mother.

She turns with a smile

and apologises.

She's got his attention.

A conversation

starts.

Social media

will reveal

the rest of the story

to us.

A well-known

community worker

cheats on wife.

Pastor caught

with prostitute.

What we might call

a honey trap,

Proverbs calls

honey lips.

Look at verse 3.

For the lips

of the adulterous woman

drip honey

and her speech

is smoother

than oil.

Or as we would say,

smoother

and softer

than silk.

You see,

the message

of Proverbs

Proverbs 5 · chapter mention

chapter 5

is very clear

to us.

And it's simply this.

Listen

to the wisdom

of God's words

so that you

stay clear

of free love's

empty words.

Listen to the wisdom

of God's word

so that we

stay clear

of free love's

empty words.

Verse 7.

Now then,

my sons,

listen to me.

Do not

turn aside

from what I say.

Keep to a path

far from her.

Do not

go near

to the door

of her house.

Verse 20.

Why,

my son,

be intoxicated

with another man's wife?

Why embrace

the bosom

of a wayward woman?

For your ways

are in full view

of the Lord.

and he examines

all your paths.

Be careful

of the sweet

words

from honey lips.

Sexual freedom

is good for you.

It's your body

and your choice.

If it feels good,

then it must be good.

Don't wait.

Just do it.

An explosion

of TV shows

entice us

to follow

our desires.

Believe it or not,

this is what is

on your TV screens.

Naked attraction.

Love island.

I kissed a boy

or I kissed a girl.

Too hot to handle.

Dating naked.

The bachelor.

Ex on the beach.

The great sex experiment.

And add to that

the plethora

of dating apps,

porn sites,

romance novels.

For the lips

of the adulterous

man

or woman

drip honey

and their speech

is smoother

than oil.

What harm is there

in a one-night stand?

Why limit yourself

to just

one person?

You're free

to scroll through

endless porn videos

on your phone.

You're free

to experiment

and see

what you

like.

But there's a problem

with all of that.

Honey lips

only tells us

one side

of the story.

Look at verse 4.

In the end

she is

bitter as gall

sharp as a

double-edged sword.

It's like

biting into a lemon.

Your mouth

is immediately

full of

sweet sensations

driving you wild

but

the bitter

aftertaste

lingers long.

Verse 5.

Her feet

go down

to death.

Her steps

lead straight

to the grave.

Oh the promises

for so much

pleasure

but a life

of destruction

is the price

for momentary

satisfaction.

So whether

we are young

or old

whether we are

married

or single

be careful

of

honey lips

or

people

are young

or

people

or

people

are young

people

are young

or

people

!

!

!

!

Well first

!

The big thing

that we need

to learn

is the folly

or the stupidity

of sexual

freedom.

Verse 8.

Keep to a path

far from her

or him.

Do not go near

the door

of their house.

Stay away

from honey

lips.

don't engage

with free

love's

offer

because

it's not

free.

It's

costly.

It will

cost you

relationally.

Verse 9.

Lest you

lose your

honour

or your

relationships

to others

and your

dignity

your respect

to one

who is

cruel.

The husband

who has

an affair

the wife

who fantasises

about the

man at work

is never

ever

private.

It costs

you

your

relationships

your

relationship

with your

spouse

with your

children

with your

friends

with your

colleagues.

Well why

do you say

that?

Well because

through your

actions

you've

broken

trust

you've

told lies

you've

cheated

and as

you give

yourself

to one

so you

are always

withholding

your love

from others.

It's the

same

for teens

and young

men.

Hours of

watching porn

means you

actually lose

the ability

to relate

to women

as you

should.

Teen

boys just

become angry

with their

mothers.

young

men

treat

women

as just

mere

physical

objects

of

pleasure

to

serve

their

needs

some

kind

of

conquest

exercise.

For

young

women

who give

their

bodies

freely

in search

of love

well it

leads to

a hatred

of self

as they

are used

by one

partner

after another.

you look

in the

mirror

and you

don't like

what you

see.

Sexual

freedom

is not

free

it costs

you

relationally.

All those

programs

and TV

are but a

lie

seductive

words that

entangle

you in a

broken

mess.

not just

relationally

but it

can cost

you

financially.

Verse

10

Lest

strangers

feast

on your

wealth

and all

your

toil

all your

hard work

your

well-earned

money

enrich

the house

of another.

We've

seen it

an affair

can quickly

turn to

blackmail

a one-night

stand to

a child

that needs

ongoing

support

and financial

care.

Breakups

separation

and divorce

leads to

a division

of assets

where no

one wins

after the

solicitors

take their

cut.

Sexual

freedom

can lead

to addiction

and the

buying of

sex

whether

that's

online

or with

real

people.

Soon

your

stability

becomes

an

uncontrolled

debt.

Sexual

freedom

is

never

free.

It

costs

us

financially.

In

fact

it will

lead

to a

life

of

desperate

deep

regret.

Verse

11

at

the

end

of

your

life

you

will

groan

when

your

flesh

and

body

are

spent.

When

you're

left

and

you

can

do

nothing

but

just

sit.

Verse

12

you will

look

back

and reflect

on your

life

and you

will

say

how I

had

hated

discipline

how my

heart

had

spurned

correction.

I

would

not

obey

my

teachers

or

turn

my

ear

to

my

instructors.

I

wish

I

could

have

started

all

over

again.

I

wish

I

had

made

better

choices

in

my

life.

Why

didn't

I

listen

when

I

heard

that

sermon

on

Proverbs

5?

The

folly

of

sexual

freedom

is

this.

It

is

costly

and

it

leaves

us

with

deep

regret.

Verse

23

For

lack

of

discipline

they

will

die

led

astray

by

their

own

great

folly.

Be

careful

of

honey

lips

whether

it

is

him

or

her

and

their

seductive

words

it

leads

to

a

broken

mess.

Second

the

joy

of

faithful

marriage.

You

see

while

sexual

freedom

is

wrong

and

destructive

there

is a

context

where

sick

sex

is

good

and

beautiful.

Look

at

verse

17

let

them

be

yours

alone

never

to

be

shared

with

strangers.

He's

talking

about

marriage

and it's

within

marriage

that we

find

joyful

sexual

pleasure

but not

just

as we

want

because

first

there

is

boundaries

for

sex.

Verse

15

drink

water

from

your

own

cistern

running

water

from

your

own

well.

The

imagery

is

poetic

and

clear.

It's

simply

saying

have

sex

with

your

own

wife

enjoy

intimacy

with

your

own

husband.

Quench

your

thirst

for

sexual

pleasure

with

the

one

you

are

married

to.

Our

bodies

are not

to be

shared

around.

Verse

16

Should

your

springs

overflow

in the

streets?

Your

streams

of

water

in the

public

squares?

If

you're

married

don't

go

giving

yourself

to

anyone

else.

You

belong

to

your

spouse.

Guard

your

marriage.

Protect

your

marriage.

Don't

exchange

your

lover

with

the

images

on

screen

or

the

fantasies

within

your

head.

You

see

sex

is

God's

idea

not

ours

and

the

only

right

and

good

context

is

within

a

marriage.

A

union

of

one

man

and

one

woman

for

life

or

until

death

parts.

So

there

are

boundaries

that

we

must

take

note

of.

But

with

boundaries

in

place

there

is

pleasure.

Sometimes

we can

get the

impression

certainly

from

social

media

and

from

what

we

listen

to

other

places

that

God

is

anti

sex.

That

sex

is only

for

making

babies.

Well

look

at

how

the

author

delights

in

his

wife.

Verse

19

A

loving

doe

a

graceful

deer.

I

often

wondered

what

Kirsty

would

think

if I

called

her

a

graceful

doe

or a

loving

deer.

I'm

not

quite

sure

what

response

I

would

get

but

obviously

there

was

some

romantic

image

their

slenderness

their

sleekness

but

as we

go

on

it

needs

no

explanation

does

it?

May

her

breasts

satisfy

you

always.

May

you

ever

be

intoxicated

with

her

love.

We

are

reading

the

Bible.

That

is

what

it

says.

God

designed

men

and

women

differently

so

wives

and

husbands

can

take

pleasure

in

each

other.

Look

at the

end

of

verse

19.

May

you

ever

be

intoxicated

with

her

love.

Yes

there

are

boundaries

but

within

marriage

you

are

free

to

enjoy

each

other.

Literally

it's

saying

get

drunk

in

each

other's

love.

You

see

a

healthy

sexual

relationship

binds

and

strengthens

the

marriage.

intimacy

leads

to

security.

In

fact

a

marriage

that

is

healthy

means

that

you

will

function

better.

Out

of

your

love

for

one

another

will

overflow

love

to

other

people.

Your

service

of

one

another

and

to

each

other

will

overflow

in

service

to

each

other.

If

we're

not

at

one

with

our

spouse

well then

we are

not in

a good

place

to serve

and love

and care

for others.

Now before

we move

on

there are

two things

that I

want us

to note.

It's

not on the

screen but

here we are.

The first

is

sex is

never

demanded.

when man

and woman

get married

yes we

submit and

surrender

ourselves

to each

other.

What is

his belongs

to hers

what is

hers belongs

to him.

Sex is

to be

given

willingly

and lovingly.

It is

never to

be forced

or

coerced.

Marriage

doesn't

give you

the right

to do

what you

like

when you

like.

It is

a beautiful

gift

designed

by God

given

in the

context

of marriage

to serve

each

other.

Never

demanded.

And the

second thing

is this

sex is

not

everything.

So whether

we're married

or single

here today

sex doesn't

determine

your joy.

Our joy

is ultimately

found not

in the

gifts that

God gives

us but

in God

himself who

is the

giver.

Our joy

is in

God who

made us

who loved

us and

he only

gives what

is good

and best

for us.

It's in

our relationship

with God

that we

are ultimately

and truly

satisfied.

So the

joy of a

faithful marriage

is this

sex within

the boundaries

of marriage

is good

and beautiful

and gives

you joyful

pleasure.

So first

we've got

the folly

of sexual

freedom and

its destruction

leading to

death and

then second

we have

the joy

of a

faithful

marriage.

God's good

designs,

his boundaries

and the

freedom to

enjoy his

good gifts.

But third,

the purity

for sinful

choices.

I think

there's two

big

applications

from Proverbs

5 that I

think we need

to consider

together this

morning.

warning.

The first

is this,

the warning.

Now you

might be here

and you're

thinking,

well what's

the harm?

What if I do

venture down the

path of sexual

freedom?

It's only just

a bit of fun.

I can always

turn back

onto the

right path.

Well you

can't.

You see

sexual sin

as with

any sin

enslaves

you.

It

controls

you and

masters

you.

You think

you're in

control but

sin's tentacles

are gripped

around you.

Look at

verse 22.

The evil

deeds of the

wicked ensnare

them, the

cords of

their sins,

their tentacles

hold them

fast.

For lack

of discipline

they will

die, led

astray by

their own

great folly.

You see

the rewards

of sexual

freedom, the

cost of all

of our sin,

whatever that

may be, is

not ultimately

satisfaction but

death.

That's the

reason we

all die.

is because

we are

enslaved to

sin.

A death

that is not

just physical

but leads

to a

separation

from God

and from

all that is

good for

all eternity.

Honey lips

may entice

you with

her lies

or his

lies but

all it does

is lead to

a life of

emptiness from

which we

cannot break

free.

verse 6

she gives

no thought

to the

way of

life.

Her

paths

wander

aimlessly

and she

doesn't

even

know it.

And that's

what will

happen to

us.

Sure a

bit of

porn is

no harm.

A moment

of playful

sex with

my boyfriend

or girlfriend

it's all

just fun.

No.

it takes

you down

a path

of destruction

and you

don't even

know you're

on it.

Wisdom's

message is

don't come

to the end

of your life

in regret

where you

face death

without the

forgiveness

and love

and kindness

of our God.

Accept

the discipline

of wisdom

now and

repent

turn back

to God

and he

will forgive

you

and he

will renew

you and

restore to

you the

joy of

salvation.

Which

brings us

to the

second

application

and I

think perhaps

this is where

it hits

home for

most of

us.

Yes we

need the

warning

but perhaps

for most

of us

it's

cleansing.

We look

back on

our life

we look

at our

present

life

and we

see the

devastating

impact of

our sinful

choices.

You see

not one of

us here in

this room

can say

I am

pure.

Verse

21

for our

ways

are in

full view

of the

Lord

and he

examines

all

our

paths.

God

sees all

my

actions

he knows

all about

my

thoughts

in fact

for most

of us as we

listen and as we

think about

this we can

become overcome

with guilt

and shame

because of

our sexual

sin.

We feel

ashamed

and dirty.

We long

to be washed

and made

clean.

We want

to be

pure.

Well that's

the wisdom

of God's

word to us

today and

where it is

pointing us.

It is leading

us to Christ

who will

clean us

of every

stain

and blemish.

You see

the marriage

that we

were looking

at,

the joyful

marriage

is a

relationship

pointing to

a better

and greater

marriage to

come.

The sexual

pleasure of

marriage is

only just

a foretaste

of the

ultimate

joy of

being in

a right

relationship

with God

and being

with him

in his

eternal

kingdom

forever.

Turn with

me please

to

Ephesians

Ephesians 5 · chapter mention

chapter 5.

Ephesians

Ephesians 5 · chapter mention

chapter 5.

Ephesians

Ephesians 5 · chapter mention

chapter 5.

Here Paul

has been

talking about

marriage.

A

wonderful gift

from God.

He's been

talking about

how the

wife gives

herself to

her husband

and how

the husband

gives himself

to his

wife

in every

way.

But this

marriage

relationship

points to

something

better,

to someone

who is

greater.

Let's pick

it up in

verse 25.

Husbands,

love your

wives.

Well, how

do we do

that?

Just as

Christ loved

the church

and gave

himself up

for her.

You see,

our earthly

marriages, if

we can call

it that,

are pointing

to a

greater

marriage

between

Christ

and his

people.

Verse 26,

to make

her

holy,

cleansing

her by

the washing

with water

through the

word or

through the

gospel,

to present

her to

himself as

a radiant

church

without

stain or

wrinkle

or any

other

blemish,

but

holy

and

blameless.

Do you

see what

he's saying

here?

In all

that we

have said

so far,

you who

are overcome

with guilt

and shame,

you who

have the

stain of

sexual

sin,

he's

saying,

come to

Jesus

because he

loves

you,

because

God sent

his son

Jesus

Christ

into the

sexual

chaos of

this world.

He came

to rescue

us from

the brokenness

of our

sinful

choices.

In

love,

verse 25,

he gave

himself up

for her.

Jesus

gave himself

up for

us,

that is,

he died

for us

on the

cross.

He takes

all of

our impurity

on himself

so that

we in

turn might

receive

his

purity.

He did

this so

that we

would be

made

beautiful

for him

like a

bride

dressed

for her

husband.

How

wonderful

is that?

Come

to

Jesus.

Let us

confess our

most hidden

and secret

sin.

Trust in

him and

he will

cleanse

us.

He will

wash away

your sin

forever.

Verse 27,

he will

present her

to himself

as a

radiant

church

without

stain or

wrinkle

or any

other

blemish

but holy

and

blameless.

You see,

as we

entrust

ourselves

to Christ,

we are

in Christ,

the only

one who

is truly

beautiful

and right

and pure

and so

God will

look at

you and

see the

beauty

and purity

of his

son and

you will

remain in

his presence

and enjoy

his good

gifts

forever.

You see,

through Christ

all our

sin and

guilt is

dealt

with.

We are

now pure

ready as

a bride

for that

ultimate

marriage to

come when

Christ comes

again and

takes his

church to

be with him

in the new

heavens and

the new

earth.

A life

with Christ

where there

is joy and

pleasures

now and

forevermore.

Don't

listen to

the silky

words of

sexual

freedom.

It will

destroy you.

Instead,

let us

together

listen to

the wisdom

of God's

words

because they

are good

and they

will save

you.

Let's

pray.

pray.

Let's

pray.

Let's

pray.

Let's

Let's

pray.

Father,

thank you

that your

word

is like

honey,

sweet

as a

honeycomb.

it is

good

and it

is right.

Thank you

for your

good design

of us

for our

lives

and for

the good

gifts that

you give

to us.

Father,

help us

to live

according to

your path

and your

wisdom

and your

ways.

Help us

forever to

run to

Christ,

to receive

from him

cleansing,

washing.

Thank you

that in

Christ all

that is

freely

available

in abundance

for every

kind of

sin.

Help us

to walk

in your

paths this

week.

Help us

to reflect

your good

design

to the

world in

which we

live.

Help us

to point

others

to Jesus.

And it's

in his

name we

pray.

Amen.