Sermon

Anger: The Sin We Justify

Liberty Church NC

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  1. There's an answer to that question actually.

  2. You can. You can and you shouldn't be

  3. able to. But man, you have so much access

  4. to this God of all creation. Y'all feel his spirit in here.

  5. If you are somebody who's not feeling the presence of his

  6. spirit in here, it's OK. I don't want you to say like

  7. man, why do they get to? And I don't ask him for it.

  8. We're going to in just a moment, we're going to ask him together

  9. so that you can feel this too. I want you to understand this.

  10. Your faith life is so much more than your emotions, but it is

  11. also not less than your emotions.

  12. OK, so your emotions were given to you today as we talk about

  13. anger. Anger is not a sin, it's an

  14. emotion and we're going to talk about it.

  15. Every emotion that you possess is something that was placed

  16. inside of you from your Creator. They are all things that He

  17. shares with you. He knows what it is to feel

  18. grief. He knows what it is to feel sad.

  19. He knows what it is to be angry. Read the Old Testament.

  20. OK, but I'm telling you that the peace that He also possesses, it

  21. belongs to you. It's accessible.

  22. I'm telling you that you can walk through difficult things

  23. and be at peace. You can at the same time be sad

  24. about a situation and have His peace.

  25. You can be angry at what somebody did and have His peace.

  26. Who can know His glory? The ones who carry His glory.

  27. You carry His glory on this earth.

  28. And there are people that will never see it unless they see it

  29. first in somebody else. So their salvation does not rest

  30. on your shoulders. Take that off.

  31. A lot of times we've heard evangelistic messages that say

  32. get out there, share your faith or people are going to go to

  33. hell, they're going to burn and kind of the the hinted at

  34. messages and if you don't do your part, it's going to be your

  35. fault. No, no, no.

  36. If anybody rejects God, it's between them and the Lord.

  37. But don't you want to be a part of seeing somebody's life

  38. changed? Don't you want to be used by the

  39. God who gave you purpose, the one who created you, knit you

  40. together in your mother's womb, had you birthed on this earth so

  41. that you could have a purpose? Don't you want to do that?

  42. Adam? When Adam was created, he was

  43. created for purpose. He was born with jobs to do.

  44. And many of us were like, I just want a day off.

  45. Adam was born and he had to tend to the garden and name the

  46. animals and he had all these different things.

  47. He already had purpose when he was created.

  48. There wasn't even sin rampant on the earth for us, you and I,

  49. we've got purpose. You can't carry out your purpose

  50. unless you carry that glory to somebody who needs it.

  51. But here's the thing. We talked about this just a

  52. couple weeks ago. Don't get lost comparing it.

  53. Don't start looking at somebody else and saying I could.

  54. I can't do it like that person does it.

  55. She, she shows the joy of God a lot more than me.

  56. I'm like grumpy bear from the Care Bears or like, that's OK.

  57. Believe it or not, the grumpy people get access to people that

  58. the joyful people don't. You can be grumpy and overjoyed

  59. with your salvation at the same time.

  60. Carry it where God tells you to carry it.

  61. Complete the mission, God, for those of us who feel your

  62. presence here, we're just, we're pleading with you.

  63. Keep your presence here for the rest of this service.

  64. For those of us that don't, God, we're pleading with you.

  65. Let us feel it. Let us feel something that we

  66. typically don't. And we're not looking to get

  67. weird or crazy or sensational, but we just want to know that

  68. you're here. The same way that we would feel

  69. comforted by a parent as they enter, in the same way that

  70. maybe we would feel comforted around the people who understand

  71. us and see us for who we are and still accept us.

  72. Can we just feel like our Father is here and recognizing us?

  73. God, we intercede for one another.

  74. For those that are more skeptical, can we just lean on

  75. the strength that you've given them so that we don't get

  76. bulldozed and, and snowed over by every wind of, of different

  77. teaching that's floating around these days?

  78. And, and God, for those that are wide open to it, God, could you

  79. just let them reawake the wonder for all of us, God, make us wise

  80. as serpents, but innocent as doves and let us carry out the

  81. mission that you have for us in the name of Jesus.

  82. Everybody said Amen, Amen. Hey, I'm going to ask for the,

  83. the care team to, to come forward.

  84. Thank you. And as they come forward, I just

  85. want to, I just want to encourage you guys as you give

  86. today, in case you, in case this makes you more comfortable as

  87. you, as you give your tithe, you're offering your hard earned

  88. money. I have no guarantee for you as

  89. you put your money in to the, to the offering.

  90. Just want you to know that there's really very few

  91. guarantees on this earth. You know, and of course we want

  92. guarantees, you know, we, we want to know from the doctor, if

  93. I do this, will this guarantee that I'll never deal with this

  94. again? And there's no guarantee.

  95. Could you imagine, could you imagine going in for surgery?

  96. And they're like, I've been, I've been waiting for this day

  97. of my whole life. You're my first surgery.

  98. Can you can you give me a guarantee?

  99. I just probably a little dark. Could you imagine if you had

  100. like, could you imagine if you were somebody's first time they

  101. did a tattoo like or the first time like it's just it could be

  102. scary, right? There's no guarantee.

  103. I heard a teaching. It was a woman ranting on, on

  104. Facebook. And I like watching these

  105. because I like to, to try to pick out if I agree with them or

  106. if I don't. And when she started ranting, Oh

  107. man, I completely disagreed with her.

  108. And she was just ranting and she was talking about how mad she

  109. gets when she says, when she goes to church, as people say,

  110. you're not giving your money to us, you're giving your money to

  111. God. And she said, and I really don't

  112. like that. And I'm thinking, but I get up

  113. here and I say, it's a covenant between you and the Lord.

  114. And it is. Here's here's the distinction.

  115. I'm glad that I didn't do what we all do and just like flick it

  116. away or whatever going in the next video, the more that she

  117. talked, she said you don't get to accept the money, but then

  118. not accept responsibility when there's a problem in your

  119. church. So if you don't accept the

  120. responsibility, don't say that I gave my money to God.

  121. But then if there's a problem, you know I have to take it to

  122. him and and you don't have any responsibility.

  123. What she said was this. She said I have no problem

  124. giving at church. She said, I have no problem

  125. putting money into the hands of flawed men and women that I hope

  126. will use it for the Kingdom, but I trust God and his faithfulness

  127. with it. And when I got to the end of the

  128. video, I went, man, I wanted to argue with her.

  129. And I, I agree with her. If you've ever had a child

  130. sponsorship, if you've ever donated to some sort of charity

  131. that's fighting an illness or Cancer Research, if you ever get

  132. a given out of church, I just want you to know there's no

  133. guarantees. We may not play your favorite

  134. song next week. The ministry you want to see may

  135. not be birthed overnight. I'm, I'm pretty open these days

  136. to talk about just about anything.

  137. And if you were here a couple Wednesdays ago for love and sex

  138. and covenant, then you know that.

  139. But I'll just tell you, my predecessor, the pastor that was

  140. here for 33 years, he used to, he used to catch some, some crap

  141. from some people. Yeah, I said it.

  142. He used to catch some because he would drive around in a Buick

  143. and they give him a hard time. And I have two cars that are

  144. paid off and the paint is peeling now on both of them.

  145. And I haven't had a car payment in six years.

  146. And I, too, have caught judgement from people for not

  147. having a newer car. I'm just telling you, no matter

  148. what you do in this life, there's no guarantee.

  149. None whatsoever except one. And we just sang about it.

  150. So whatever you do from this moment on, if you give, if you

  151. don't give, if you go out and you're with somebody from this

  152. church after lunch today, if you're on your own or whatever,

  153. whatever you do, the only guarantee is the presence of God

  154. in your life. But you have to be open to it.

  155. And if you want to keep that presence in your life, you have

  156. to be obedient to it. So God, we left up this time of

  157. giving to you, and we just pray that it would be used for your

  158. purposes in the name of Jesus, Amen.

  159. I'm going to ask for Jake Collier to come up here.

  160. You know, as he's making his way up here, I do want to encourage

  161. you guys coming out to the midweek service.

  162. I told them this on Wednesday. I was, I was preaching on how

  163. easy it is to drift from the Lord.

  164. It's not normally one big moment, but we but we drift,

  165. right? Yes.

  166. Jake is not from State Farm, but you're not wearing khakis, so

  167. that's all right. I want to encourage you because,

  168. man, I got the next several Wednesdays off.

  169. We've got some different people that are going to be sharing a

  170. word this Wednesday. Begrudgingly.

  171. My wife Cassie is going to be preaching.

  172. And I say that because she's yes, no, she's such a good

  173. teacher. But she came to me and she said

  174. the the Lord gave me something to preach.

  175. And I said she excited. She just looked at me.

  176. Some people, they're not comfortable up here.

  177. But man, it's a great case for obedience.

  178. She feels like she's got something from the Lord.

  179. And so she's already been working real hard on it.

  180. And the title of her message is, what if I'm not feeling it?

  181. Oh, I see we have plenty of apathetic people here today.

  182. Great. So you need to be here 7:00 on

  183. Wednesday. And we'll unpack that as Cassie

  184. shares a word. Jake here is going for the prize

  185. of winning the most times being prayed out at this church ever.

  186. Jake is a missionary intern in Guatemala.

  187. So he's here for a season and then he's back.

  188. Like the honestly, like the mission field is like the mafia

  189. for him. Every time he thinks he's out,

  190. they pull him right back, right? But we don't want you to get

  191. whacked. So we're going to send you back

  192. to to Guatemala. You know, I said this a couple

  193. weeks ago. Jake was sharing a little bit.

  194. Jake is a worthy investment if you ever do want to give and

  195. help support him either one time or recurring, he could use it

  196. down there. I've talked with Pastor Steve

  197. and Anna McDaniel, they have high hopes for him and, and,

  198. and, and there's a lot of people down there that are excited for

  199. him to get down there and to return.

  200. And I think he's going to spend a significant amount of time

  201. there. If you do want to give, you can

  202. do it at libertync.org. He's got his own missionary fund

  203. under Jake Collier. It says nothing about State

  204. Farm, but if you see Jake, it's this guy, right coming over

  205. here. And what I want to do is I just

  206. want y'all to lift up your hands.

  207. He's going to fly out tomorrow. It's tomorrow today, today.

  208. OK, you get there tomorrow. Yes, today is Charlotte,

  209. tomorrow there. And we're just going to be

  210. praying for safety and provision for him.

  211. So, Father, we thank you so much for Jake.

  212. We thank you for a young man who's willing to put his life on

  213. hold to go and carry the gospel where you send him.

  214. I'm already noticing a theme of obedience today, Father.

  215. And so we just ask that your spirit would just cover him

  216. that, that these would be smooth flights, that even the the

  217. passengers who have flight anxiety, they just catch some of

  218. that overflow of peace just because Jake is on there.

  219. They don't even know it. God, would you just go with him,

  220. give him safe flights, let him get connected at the right time,

  221. give him the right conversations and ahead of him.

  222. I just pray that your spirit would be waiting for good work,

  223. fruitful work for the ministry that the Kingdom would grow

  224. because of Jake's obedience and Jake's faithfulness to you down

  225. there. We ask you to bless living

  226. water, adopt A child and the good work that they are doing.

  227. And we thank you for all of this in the name of Jesus, Amen.

  228. Amen. Might need this in a minute.

  229. All right, we could go to First Samuel 25.

  230. We'll start in the Old Testament.

  231. And today we're going to talk about anger.

  232. Any, any anybody with anger issues or, you know, somebody

  233. with anger issues, right? How many of you have anger

  234. issues? But you feel like most people

  235. wouldn't assume you have anger issues.

  236. There's so many of those, right. Yeah.

  237. Well, anger presents very differently.

  238. Oh, I saw that. I saw someone point at Mama

  239. Sandra. You are correct.

  240. So I just want to, I just want to start by telling you

  241. something that's fairly current in culture, right?

  242. There are certain moments in history that are so shocking,

  243. you remember them immediately. And one of those happened during

  244. the Academy Awards in 2022. Anybody already know where I'm

  245. going with this very famous actor?

  246. Will Smith was in the audience at the Academy Awards with his

  247. wife, Jada Pinkett Smith, when Chris Rock walked on the stage

  248. and presented an award. And of course, he's a comedian,

  249. and he's known for really edgy comedy.

  250. So as comedians often do during live shows, he began making

  251. jokes about the celebrities in the audience.

  252. And then he looked towards Jada and joked that he was looking

  253. forward to seeing her in the next GI Jane movie.

  254. Now, GI Jane was a movie starring Demi Moore back in the

  255. 90s. She shaved her head for it.

  256. And Jada Pinkett Pinkett Smith also has a very short haircut.

  257. So we joked about this because of her shaved head.

  258. And at first, this is something I did not hear a lot of people

  259. talk about, but you can look this up.

  260. At first, Will Smith is laughing.

  261. If you watch the video, he was laughing until he looked at his

  262. wife. You can see it on the broadcast

  263. when he looks over at Jada's face.

  264. She wasn't laughing, but Jada Pinkett Smith has alopecia.

  265. It's a condition that causes hair loss.

  266. And so that joke had a really personal and sensitive area for

  267. her. So within seconds, everything

  268. changed. How many of you all know that,

  269. hey, you can insult me, but if you insult my spouse, you insult

  270. my kids. It's a different conversation.

  271. Second hand offense is so much worse than first hand.

  272. So Will Smith stood up, walked onto the stage in front of

  273. millions of people and slapped Chris Rock across the face, then

  274. returned to his seat, shouting some words to keep his wife's

  275. name out of his very descriptive mouth.

  276. The whole room fell silent there.

  277. And here's why. Because nobody knew if that was

  278. real or if it was staged. Nobody did when they first

  279. watched it. But I'll tell you what, it only

  280. took minutes for it to start going all around the news

  281. cycles, and it's really not newsworthy.

  282. But man, was it interesting. And so we all fell into it.

  283. Anybody who says they never came to gossip, you're wrong.

  284. OK, But here's what ended up happening.

  285. Careers got affected by this, including his.

  286. He ended up resigning from the Academy and he's banned from

  287. attending, attending the Oscars for 10 years.

  288. Will Smith, if you're watching this, I've never been to the

  289. Oscars. It gets better.

  290. It's going to be OK. What should have been remembered

  291. as a night, by the way, that he won his first Academy Award.

  292. Nobody talked about that. Now it was remembered because he

  293. slapped the taste out of somebody's mouth.

  294. I don't want to just talk about the fact that it happened.

  295. I want to talk about how quickly it happened.

  296. OK. Because one emotional response

  297. overshadowed decades of incredible work.

  298. How many of us have a favorite work of Will Smith, whether it's

  299. Fresh Prince of Bel Air, right, or Hitch or there's all sorts of

  300. things that he's done throughout the years.

  301. When they said they were going to cast a live version of the

  302. Genie without Robin Williams available, I thought they'll

  303. never get it right. They kind of got it right.

  304. I don't know who could have done it better than him.

  305. None of that mattered in that one moment.

  306. That one moment became what he was known for.

  307. He was the meme of the month. And here's the thing.

  308. Anger has a strange way of making retaliation feel like

  309. justice. The problem is, the second you

  310. try to put justice in your hands, the Lord says you can

  311. have it. And it's really not justice.

  312. We just call it that Anger narrows our vision until making

  313. the other person feel what we feel seems not only reasonable

  314. but necessary. Could you imagine?

  315. I'm just going to throw a hypothetical situation out

  316. there. What if Will Smith had walked up

  317. there, grabbed the microphone and said, my wife has struggled

  318. with alopecia and that's actually very insensitive to her

  319. and I'd appreciate it if you don't joke like that again.

  320. Would it not have been a massively different moment?

  321. But anger, anger has a way of sliding right on over into that

  322. driver's seat, doesn't it? So if we're all willing to be

  323. honest today, we've all experienced that moment.

  324. Maybe not on live television in front of millions of people, but

  325. we have seen the text or heard the comment, or we've slammed

  326. the door before and we've raised our voice at somebody.

  327. And maybe we posted something online because we were angry.

  328. And then we normally end up with like, rant over or soapbox over.

  329. But it's not. Just so you know, it's never

  330. really over as long as you leave it unsettled.

  331. That's exactly where we're going to find David here in First

  332. Samuel 25. You're going to see where he

  333. makes a real angry decision. David has every reason to be

  334. angry with Nabel. You're going to see this.

  335. The question is on whether his anger is understandable.

  336. The question is what he's about to do with it.

  337. So we'll start in verse 2. It says there was a wealthy man

  338. from Mayon who owned property near the town of Carmel.

  339. He had 3000 sheep and 1000 goats.

  340. It was sheep shearing time. So busy season, right?

  341. This man's name was Nabel and his wife Abigail was a sensible

  342. and beautiful woman. But Nabel, a descendant of

  343. Caleb, was crude and mean in all his dealings.

  344. When David heard that Nabel was shearing his sheep, he sent ten

  345. of his young men to Carmel with a message for Nabel.

  346. He said peace and prosperity to you, your family, and everything

  347. you own. I am told that it is sheep

  348. shearing time. While your shepherds stayed

  349. among us near Carmel, we never harmed them and nothing was ever

  350. stolen from them. Ask your own men and they will

  351. tell you this is true. So would you be kind to us?

  352. Since we have come at a time of celebration, please share any

  353. provisions you might have on hand with us and with your

  354. friend David. David's young men gave this

  355. message to Nabel and David's name and they waited for a

  356. reply. In other words, when he says

  357. nothing bad happened, it wasn't just like, man, we could have

  358. beat them up and we didn't. What he's saying is nobody dared

  359. come near your workers because we were there.

  360. We kept them safe. This is something we did for

  361. you. And by the way, the best that I

  362. can tell, he did this without asking for anything in return in

  363. advance. It wasn't something that was

  364. worked out. We'll keep your people safe.

  365. And then, hey, there'd be a little something on the back end

  366. for us. He never made this deal.

  367. He just did it. But this is a wealthy man, and

  368. so he sends him a request. You're always welcome to make a

  369. request. Verse 10.

  370. Who is this fellow, David? Nabel sneered to the young men.

  371. Who does this son of Jesse think he is?

  372. There are lots of servants these days who run away from their

  373. masters. In other words, you're not even

  374. obedient to King Saul, he said. Should I take my bread and my

  375. water and my meat that I've slaughtered from my shearers,

  376. there's a lot of my stuff there, and give it to a band of outlaws

  377. who came from who knows where. Well, if he knows his dad, he

  378. probably knows where they came from.

  379. Just throwing that out there. So David's young men returned

  380. and told Nabel, told him what Nabel had said.

  381. David's reply? Get your swords.

  382. As he strapped on his own And then 400 men started off with

  383. David. 200 remained behind to guard their equipment.

  384. Twice as many went on the March with weapons in hand, then

  385. stayed behind to protect whatever they had.

  386. He's mad, he's angry, and I do get why he's angry.

  387. However, do you think there might be a little bit of an

  388. overreaction here? Meanwhile, one of naval servants

  389. went to Abigail and told her. David sent messengers from the

  390. wilderness to greet our master, but he screamed insults at them.

  391. These men have been very good to us and we never suffered any

  392. harm from them. Nothing was stolen the whole

  393. time they were with us. Goes on and on with us.

  394. So verse 18. Abigail wasted no time.

  395. She quickly gathered 200 loaves of bread, 2 wineskins full of

  396. wine, 5 sheep that had been slaughtered, nearly a bushel of

  397. roasted grain, 100 clusters of raisins, and 200 fig cakes.

  398. It's a lot of Newtons. She do they sell those anymore?

  399. Do they? All right, Fig Newtons.

  400. All right. A cookie is just a cookie.

  401. But you know, fig Newtons are fruit and cake, so all right.

  402. As she was riding her her donkey, listen to this in verse

  403. 20, as she's riding her donkey into a mountain ravine, she saw

  404. David and his men coming toward her.

  405. David had just been saying a lot of good it did to help this

  406. fellow. We protected his flocks in the

  407. wilderness and nothing he owned was lost or stolen.

  408. But he repaid me evil for good. Can you?

  409. Do you hear that? Have you ever been repaid evil

  410. for good? Yes.

  411. Who has not? And if you're sitting there

  412. saying I've never been repaid evil for good, God bless your

  413. heart. You have.

  414. I want your outlook OK. So David says, May God strike me

  415. and kill me if even one man of his household is still alive

  416. tomorrow morning. When Abigail saw David she

  417. quickly got off her donkey and bowed low before him.

  418. She fell at his feet and said, I accept all blame in this matter

  419. my Lord, that's brave. Please listen to what I have to

  420. say. I know Nabal is a wicked and

  421. I'll tempered man. This is her husband.

  422. I'm guessing this was not the first problem.

  423. Please don't pay any attention to him.

  424. He is a fool, just as his name suggests.

  425. But I never even saw the young men you sent.

  426. Now, my Lord, as surely as the Lord lives and you yourself

  427. live, since the Lord has kept you from murdering and taking

  428. vengeance into your own hands, let all your enemies and those

  429. who try to harm you be as cursed as Nabal is.

  430. She already understands the way that this spiritual cosmic

  431. justice system works. And here's a present that I,

  432. your servant, have brought to you and your young men.

  433. And she gives all of this food, right?

  434. So verse 32, David replied to Abigail, Praise the Lord the God

  435. of Israel who has sent you to meet me today, and thank God for

  436. your good sense. Bless you for keeping me from

  437. murder and carrying out vengeance with my own hands.

  438. He could have played that down, but he knew what it was.

  439. I swear by the Lord the God of Israel who's kept me from

  440. hurting you, that if you had not hurried out to meet me, not one

  441. of Nabel's men would still be alive tomorrow morning.

  442. And then David accepted her present and told her return home

  443. in peace. I've heard what you said.

  444. We will not kill your husband. The Bible doesn't pretend that

  445. David had no reason to be upset. Nabel was very selfish.

  446. He was very insulting. David and his men spent months

  447. working and keeping them safe, and Nabel just saw a great deal.

  448. Sucker. Thanks for being willing to

  449. help. Should have put it in writing.

  450. Nabel publicly humiliated him. He spoke like this in front of

  451. David's people. If we had been standing there in

  452. that day, most of us probably would have said David has every

  453. right to be angry. But that's what makes this story

  454. so dangerous. I want you to think about every

  455. time somebody you love has come to you and you've said, yeah,

  456. you have every right to be angry.

  457. I don't blame you for feeling that way.

  458. That's not the problem. Of course he was angry.

  459. David's anger wasn't the problem, the same way that your

  460. anger is not the problem. His anger was telling him that

  461. something happened that wasn't right.

  462. We can all agree with this. Someone had been dishonest and

  463. disrespectful. Somebody had treated kindness

  464. with cruelty in return. Anger is a lot like a warning

  465. light on the dashboard of your car, and we'll talk about that

  466. in a moment. When that light comes on, the

  467. light isn't the problem. You don't solve it by putting

  468. electrical tape over the light. You could try, but I will tell

  469. you, in the same way, anger always reveals that something

  470. important has been violated. The problem with warning lights

  471. is that they're not designed to steer the car.

  472. But we do treat him that way, don't we?

  473. David doesn't stop to ask. Lord, why am I angry?

  474. You know how fast he reacted? It's said that he told them to

  475. get their swords, and it specifically says while he's

  476. putting on his sword, he did not even put on his sword before.

  477. He was like, and y'all are going to help me with some murdering?

  478. He said it at the same time. He's ready to go.

  479. That's what's so amazing about how fast Abigail moved here.

  480. David asked for food. Nabel responded with an insult.

  481. David would have responded with the death sentence of an entire

  482. family. Now, if he stopped and thought

  483. about it, would he maybe think of a little bit of a different

  484. reaction? I'm sure he would have.

  485. But that's what anger does for all of us when it's unchecked.

  486. And you may say, well, it would never lead me to murder.

  487. Well, we'll get there. Anger always whispers that

  488. because we've been hurt, the next thing that we must do is

  489. write. And because you feel like you're

  490. the one who's been wronged, we often don't pay any attention to

  491. the idea of whether or not the way that we respond is correct.

  492. So let's talk about that warning light on the dash that we were

  493. talking about. You can be in Second Chronicles

  494. 16. I'll be there in a moment.

  495. But first, I have to confess to you that when I was 18, man, I

  496. was pushing a Chrysler Lebaron. I don't want y'all to be

  497. jealous. My stepdad got it at an auction

  498. when a little old lady passed away.

  499. And that was my car and I was driving it.

  500. And I'm going to tell you what though, when you get your first

  501. car, you don't really care what it is.

  502. I'm driving this thing around and that check engine light

  503. popped up and I looked at it and I know what it means.

  504. I mean, I know what it means. It means, you know, it's

  505. probably the oil change. It could be a few other things,

  506. but I know that it requires attention.

  507. That's why it's there. And I thought I'll get to it

  508. next week. Next week I get paid, so that's

  509. when I'll do it. Well, next week came, but I

  510. mean, I was 18, so there's other things I wanted to buy.

  511. I mean, and then you start to do this internal logic, right?

  512. What's the difference between one week and two weeks?

  513. It's not a big difference, right?

  514. So probably about six weeks later, here's the deal.

  515. Check engine lights on. It's been on for a long time.

  516. Nothing bad has happened until it did.

  517. And I'm driving on one of those back roads down there near

  518. Maysville, and all of a sudden I hear this loud pop and this

  519. little puff of black smoke comes out from under the hood.

  520. I pulled my car over. It's the last time I ever drove

  521. that car. I get it.

  522. And especially in today's day and age, the economy is rough.

  523. Things cost money. They can be expensive.

  524. You know, it's more expensive, a new car.

  525. Sorry, my kids have been watching the prices right?

  526. So that light was actually my ally.

  527. That light was there to help me. It was telling me that something

  528. needed to be paid attention to, and I wish I had paid attention

  529. to it, but that's the same way that anger works.

  530. Anger is never the engine itself.

  531. It's only the check engine light.

  532. So anger has this way of telling us that something deserves our

  533. attention. And it could be when somebody

  534. crosses a healthy boundary or there's an injustice that really

  535. does occur, or you're carrying grief that you haven't

  536. processed. Have you ever noticed that you

  537. tend to get more angry when you're exhausted?

  538. Like so there's a lot of information this light can be

  539. showing you, but anger doesn't always tell you exactly what the

  540. problem is. You have to get into the

  541. diagnostic of it. The mistake that most of us make

  542. is treating the warning light like it's the whole problem.

  543. We either ignore it completely or we let it take control of the

  544. steering wheel. And so we explode or we

  545. retaliate and we convince ourselves that because we feel

  546. angry, what we're about to do is just fine.

  547. So where we're going to be in 2nd Chronicle 16, we'll start in

  548. the very first verse. We're going to read a little bit

  549. about King ASA. And before we read him and I dog

  550. him out for his anger issues, I want you to know this.

  551. He was not always an angry man. In fact, if you read the first

  552. part of his life, he's one of the good kings.

  553. And there's not a lot of them listed through these chapters.

  554. He does lead spiritual reform all through the country of

  555. Judah, and he trusts God when the nation has impossible odds.

  556. When a massive Ethiopian army marches against him, God is the

  557. one who comes through. And then this moment happens

  558. where ASA doesn't rely on military strength.

  559. He doesn't even rely on the Lord.

  560. Instead, he starts to rely on somebody outside of himself.

  561. There's another threat that's rising up against Judah, and

  562. we'll see this together. It says in the 36th year of

  563. Asa's reign, King Baisha of Israel invaded Judah and

  564. fortified Rama in order to prevent anyone from entering or

  565. leaving King Asa's territory in Judah.

  566. So this is a military story. ASA responds by removing the

  567. silver and gold from the treasuries of the Temple of the

  568. Lord and the royal palace. He sent it to King Ben Haddad

  569. from Aram, who was ruling in Damascus.

  570. Along with this message. Let there be a treaty between

  571. you and me, like the one between your father and my father.

  572. See, I'm sending you silver and gold.

  573. Break your treaty with King Baisha of Israel so that he will

  574. leave me alone. You all notice that he he takes

  575. the silver and gold out of the temple of the Lord.

  576. He's willing to take it from the Lord and give it to somebody

  577. that he views as a valuable ally to survive life.

  578. OK, Ben Haddad agreed to King Asa's request and sent the

  579. commanders of the army to attack the towns of Israel.

  580. They conquered the towns of Ijean, Dan, Abelbeth, Maika and

  581. all the the store cities in Naphtali.

  582. And as soon as by ASA of Israel heard what was happening, he

  583. abandoned the project of fortifying Rama and he stopped

  584. all work on it. Then King ASA called out the men

  585. of Judah to carry away the building stones and Timbers that

  586. by ASA had been using to fortify it.

  587. ASA used these materials to fortify the towns of Giba and

  588. Mizpah. So it looks like it worked,

  589. didn't it? And it did.

  590. I mean, there's not A twist coming as far as that goes.

  591. At first, King Asa's plan appears to work.

  592. The enemy retreats, everything's fine.

  593. And then God sends a prophet. When God sends a prophet, right?

  594. Because prophets, they tend to have a message that we don't

  595. want to hear. So at that time Hanan and I, the

  596. seer, came to King ASA and told him, because you have put your

  597. trust in the king of of Aram instead of in the Lord your God,

  598. you missed your chance to destroy the army of the king of

  599. Aram. Wait a second, Is this not where

  600. he put the gold and silver and said, can you help protect us?

  601. You mean the very thing he invested in is now going to

  602. become a problem for him? Don't you remember what happened

  603. to The Ethiopians and Libyans and their vast army and all of

  604. their Chariots and charioteers? At that time?

  605. You relied on the Lord, and He handed them over to you.

  606. The eyes of the Lord search the whole earth in order to

  607. strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to Him.

  608. Jake, don't you ever lose what you got.

  609. Right now, as you go down to Guatemala, you stay fully

  610. committed and He will strengthen you.

  611. This country, that one or another.

  612. He says what a fool you've been. From now on you'll be at war.

  613. So how would you react? You put your strength for the

  614. first time in an outside source to keep you safe.

  615. You just found out from a prophet of the Lord that this

  616. outside source is now going to be a problem for you.

  617. I feel like it's reasonable to say I need to fall at the feet

  618. of the Lord. I need to go to the altar, I

  619. need to repent. I did something wrong.

  620. And by the way, Hen and I thank you so much for giving me

  621. critical information. And yet verse 10 says ASA became

  622. so angry with Hen and I for saying this that he threw him

  623. into prison and put him in stocks.

  624. At that time, ASA also began to oppress some of his people.

  625. Isn't that interesting? Have you ever gotten angry at

  626. somebody that told you an uncomfortable truth and then

  627. they get put into a prison, maybe not a literal one, but

  628. they get put into like a mental prison.

  629. You all of a sudden you take them and you put them in this.

  630. There's a bar there and they no longer have access.

  631. And then it says, then around this time, King ASA started to

  632. oppress his people. So then the other people, they

  633. start to catch it too. When we get mad at somebody for

  634. pointing out something that needs to be pointed out in our

  635. life, the next thing that happens is they're not the only

  636. ones that catch our anger and our fury.

  637. Those in our circle do to your spouse, your kids, your friends,

  638. whatever. Your anger bleeds out to them.

  639. And we've all been there. I had a day this week where I

  640. had to apologize to the kids because I had had a rough day.

  641. And then just the wrong comment at the wrong time.

  642. And I'm like, I don't really, you know, And the way that I

  643. spoke was not appropriate. And so I had to say I'm sorry.

  644. And I know you're like, man, you just told the story the other

  645. week about having to apologize to your kids.

  646. You sound like you have to apologize all the time.

  647. Yes, and it's healthy. I don't know, maybe you get it

  648. right all the time. Teach me your ways.

  649. But when I hurt somebody that I love, my first thought is, I'm

  650. sorry and not how do I get off the hook?

  651. Did you catch what happened with ASA there?

  652. He's angry at the person that's exposing the problem.

  653. He's mad at the check engine light.

  654. God was so good. He could have just sent

  655. judgement, but he sent a word. What you do when that word of

  656. the Lord comes to you is very crucial and very important.

  657. Instead of asking Lord what are you trying to show me, he throws

  658. a prophet into prison and starts oppressing his own people.

  659. One of the greatest dangers of anger is that sometimes the

  660. thing that you're angry about isn't actually the thing that

  661. you're angry about. Talked about this before, it's

  662. so helpful and it's used a lot in military areas too.

  663. So probably a lot of you know this, but are you familiar with

  664. those 4 letters? HALT, HALT.

  665. So what a lot of people will teach you is this.

  666. If you feel angry, don't make an important decision or an

  667. important reaction. Whenever you are hungry, angry,

  668. lonely or tired, which one is it for you?

  669. Which one is the worst, hungry, angry, lonely or tired?

  670. For me, it's lonely. If I'm feeling isolated and

  671. alone, then emotionally I feel like I'm in a corner and I have

  672. to defend myself. It's not a good place for me,

  673. not a good time for anybody, to be honest with you.

  674. For some people who may or may not live in my house, it's when

  675. it's when they're hungry. I said it in a way that they'll

  676. never know. All right?

  677. Hungry, angry, lonely or tired. Think about this.

  678. They are when your emotions are raw and you are not going to

  679. think straight, Right. I'll give you this example.

  680. How many of y'all know the universal symbol of a knife

  681. sitting like this on the sink? What does this mean?

  682. They might make another sandwich.

  683. Yeah, they don't know. Yeah, I hate it because

  684. sometimes there's another sandwich and sometimes it's two

  685. days and the peanut butter has crusted.

  686. OK. Can you not can this is just

  687. hypothetical. Can you can you not just wash

  688. the peanut butter off and if you want another sandwich, make

  689. another one? Tell you what, We're not rich,

  690. but we have more than one knife. I didn't mean to brag up here.

  691. We have more than one butter knife.

  692. Here's the thing. If you get mad over something

  693. like that, the issue's not the knife.

  694. If you get mad because the spoon that your kids used for cereal

  695. is still laying on the counter, the issue's not the spoon.

  696. The issue's probably not even the fact that the the kids left

  697. it there. Now you may say, well, you don't

  698. understand, it's been happening for months.

  699. Cool. What you just told me is the

  700. issue is you feel disrespected because they're not listening to

  701. your house rule. It's not the spoon.

  702. It's not the moment, OK? So you have to address the

  703. actual thing that's happening and not the symptom.

  704. A lot of us, it's like we're coughing.

  705. It's like we have congestion and we're just putting a Band-Aid on

  706. our throat. And we're trying to hope and

  707. wish and pray that it's going to become better.

  708. But it's not going to become better until you address what is

  709. causing the underlying issue. And we're going to talk about

  710. some of these. Unfortunately, that peanut

  711. butter knife, that spoon, these become the hills that we're

  712. willing to die on. I'm sick of him never saying

  713. he's sorry when he hurts my feelings.

  714. OK, where does that come from? Do you feel unseen by the person

  715. that loves you the most? Where does it come from?

  716. What is the underlying issue? There's always something that is

  717. deeper. Don't get mad at the anger, that

  718. is just your warning light. If anger is the warning light.

  719. Maybe one of the most practical questions you and I can ask is

  720. what is my anger trying to tell me?

  721. OK, so everybody here, I want you to know this is an

  722. incredibly practical message this morning.

  723. There is nobody, I think, in this room that it would not

  724. apply to. I want you to think about this.

  725. Here are some options. Sometimes it's just revealing

  726. that you've got an unresolved wound or hurt.

  727. Maybe you've got something you thought was healed, right?

  728. Right now I'm in a season. I feel like my dad issues are

  729. pretty well healed. But the last time I said I think

  730. I'm done with dad issues, a dad issue came up.

  731. So I'm not going to tell you that they're all healed, but

  732. I've got father issues. And most of the time, if

  733. somebody makes a joke about it, I'm fine.

  734. And every so often there's one thing that'll be said and it

  735. just hits a certain way. Now, I can snap and get angry,

  736. or I can say, well, 30 times that they were around that I

  737. heard a joke like that and didn't react poorly.

  738. No wonder. No wonder they thought it would

  739. be OK to make that joke. But this time the real problem

  740. is I had an unresolved hurt. Does that make sense?

  741. OK, sometimes you have an unresolved wound or a hurt that

  742. has nothing to do with the person that you just got angry

  743. with. Every time I do premarital

  744. counseling for a young couple, well, just for a couple, the

  745. first thing I try to talk about is baggage.

  746. Oh, man, a lot of times I've had people say I don't think I have

  747. baggage or I think I've worked through my baggage.

  748. OK, well, let's just give it a shot just in case.

  749. Baggage can come from relationship with your parents

  750. growing up, even good parents. It can come from former

  751. relationships, the way that you were treated.

  752. It can come from a workplace. It can come from identity

  753. issues. It come from all sorts of

  754. things. So let's talk about your

  755. baggage. You know why?

  756. Because if you're going to be married to somebody, guess what?

  757. They just inherited a set of baggage too.

  758. You didn't get that new car, but you got a new set of baggage and

  759. they're full. But the cool thing is, you help

  760. them carry theirs. They'll help you carry yours.

  761. At least that's the way it's supposed to work.

  762. Sometimes it also reveals what you're afraid of.

  763. Sometimes somebody will make a joke and it will actually just

  764. show what your fear is. Parents will often experience

  765. this because a teenager will come home 30 minutes later.

  766. They won't answer their phone. And what is the Beverly Goldberg

  767. thing? You could have been face down in

  768. a ditch somewhere. Gosh, if you ever saw that

  769. episode of The Goldbergs, one time one of them ends up face

  770. down in a ditch. And as he gets it, because, Oh

  771. my gosh, my mom was right, Sometimes the fear is what's

  772. making you angry. So when they come in, what they

  773. don't need is a louder voice. They need to get the message.

  774. But the louder voice doesn't make them realize how much you

  775. love them and you're afraid of losing them.

  776. But that underlying fear is what drove the anger.

  777. Does that make sense? So parents experience this a lot

  778. of times, and sometimes it just reveals exhaustion.

  779. I touched on this earlier. This is what happened with ASA.

  780. I'm convinced he wasn't really angry at the prophet.

  781. He was angry because the prophet exposed something.

  782. He didn't want to admit. He had all of these things

  783. happening. He had war with Israel.

  784. He had just put his hope in somebody else.

  785. And now the person who put his hope in his, turns out they're

  786. going to be an enemy. And now this, this prophet's

  787. probably going to be smug. He's going to rub it in my face,

  788. like all of it. It's just sometimes you feel so

  789. overwhelmed that you just become emotionally depleted and

  790. exhausted. But you know what that also ties

  791. into is our pride. It's our pride.

  792. If that nation of Judah is a company, guess who's the CEO?

  793. The king and the prophet comes in.

  794. He's like I found a flaw in the system.

  795. Straight to jail, points out pride.

  796. Couple weeks ago on Father's Day when I shared that story about

  797. how I diminished my son's emotions when he beat me at

  798. Mario Kart, what I should have asked myself is what is my anger

  799. right now telling me? What it's telling me is I wasn't

  800. ready for this. I wasn't ready to be defeated by

  801. my son at 9:00. But I'm so proud, right?

  802. I want him to be better at everything.

  803. I mean I want him to know the Lord better than me before I

  804. leave this earth. I want him to be better at Mario

  805. Kart and everything in between. What it was actually exposing

  806. was my pride in that moment when instead of exposing my pride,

  807. what I should have done is shown how proud I was of Him.

  808. And I did make it right. But you don't get the moment

  809. back, do you? Now those are all negatives.

  810. But the other thing it can show you sometimes is when a boundary

  811. has been crossed. And I want to be clear on this

  812. because yes, a lot of times we have genuine real anger over

  813. real things and sometimes a boundary has been crossed.

  814. So even then I would just tell you the warning light doesn't

  815. tell you how to respond. It just is telling you something

  816. deserves your attention. The first question should almost

  817. never be, what do I need to say? It should be Lord, What are you

  818. trying to show me? If you get angry, don't respond

  819. until you have a chance to pray if you can help it.

  820. Healthy people don't ignore the warning lights, but they also

  821. don't obey them either. They just investigate them.

  822. OK, let's talk about righteous anger.

  823. Let's talk about righteous anger.

  824. What happens when you actually have righteous anger?

  825. Well, the cool thing is, believe it or not, your anger, if it is

  826. justified and it comes from the Lord and handled the right way,

  827. it actually wants restoration. And you may say like, well, I'm

  828. one of those. Once you get me mad, you know,

  829. once you cross me, then we're done for life.

  830. I'm so sorry to hear that. You should, you should work on

  831. that. And by the way, there are times

  832. that Jesus says shake that dust off your sandal and move on.

  833. I'm not saying there's not a place for that, but not until

  834. you've tried this. OK, after everything that we

  835. talked about this morning, I, I want to make it very clear on

  836. this. Anger itself, again, is not

  837. sinful. Throughout Scripture, we can see

  838. that God experiences anger and God is not going to sin, right?

  839. So when you start looking closely at what provokes God's

  840. anger, you'll notice something that's important.

  841. He never gets angry because his pride has been wounded.

  842. He never becomes angry because someone insulted him on social

  843. media. He never gets angry because

  844. someone failed to appreciate him or bruised his ego.

  845. The only thing that consistently stirs the anger of God is when

  846. sin destroys something that he loves.

  847. And God became angry when the vulnerable were exploited all

  848. throughout scripture. He becomes angry when justice is

  849. perverted. He becomes really angry when

  850. people use religion to oppress people instead of restore them.

  851. And he becomes angry when sin destroys the image of God and

  852. people he created and loves. I'm coming to find that this is

  853. really weird to me, man. I can sit across the table from

  854. somebody who votes differently, who believes that everything I

  855. believe politically is wrong, and I'm fine.

  856. I can sit across the table from somebody who lives a different

  857. lifestyle and I'm fine. I'm not saying I won't talk

  858. about my beliefs. It just doesn't make me angry.

  859. It just doesn't make me angry because the second I start to

  860. associate anger with somebody, I start to diminish the humanity,

  861. the image of God and that person, and they become nothing

  862. more than a target to justify how I'm feeling.

  863. It's just another way that we can use people even though we're

  864. not supposed to use them at all. Let me let me point it out to

  865. you this way. You should get angry sometimes.

  866. I had somebody tell me one time, I don't think that humans can

  867. have righteous anger. OK, I want you to think about it

  868. this way. If you walked into a room and

  869. you saw somebody abusing a child and you felt nothing, we would

  870. not call that emotional maturity.

  871. We would call it apathy. And so there are moments where

  872. love should become angry because something precious is being

  873. violated. Healthy anger does not exist

  874. because someone hurt my ego. Healthy anger exists because

  875. something valuable is being destroyed.

  876. Big difference. And so there's one category that

  877. we talked about in the last point that stands apart from all

  878. the others, and it's when a boundary has genuinely been

  879. crossed. So the clearest answer to that

  880. question is to show you when Jesus got angry.

  881. And man, Christians, we love this one.

  882. I've seen tattoos of this one. Let's talk about Jesus flipping

  883. some tables. We'll start in John chapter 2.

    John 2 chapter mention

  884. Not everybody knows this, but Jesus didn't flip tables one

  885. time. It was 2 times, once towards the

  886. beginning of his earthly ministry, once towards the end.

  887. A lot of people get it confused because as you read through all

  888. the accounts of the gospels, it tends to all get jumbled

  889. together, but they were both similar accounts that happened

  890. at different times. In John chapter 2, starting at

    John 2 chapter mention

  891. verse 13, it says it was nearly the time for the Jewish Passover

  892. celebration. So Jesus went to Jerusalem.

  893. In the temple area He saw merchants selling cattle, sheep,

  894. and doves for sacrifices. He also saw dealers at tables

  895. exchanging foreign money. How many of you all have gotten

  896. caught within a foreign currency exchange before?

  897. This is an old practice. OK, Jesus made a whip from some

  898. ropes. No, that's not what the rope is

  899. for. I just wanted to stress somebody

  900. out. All right?

  901. Jesus made a whip from some ropes and chased them out of the

  902. temple. He drove out the sheep and the

  903. cattle, scattered the money changers coins all over the

  904. floor and turned over their tables.

  905. And then going over to the people who sold doves, he told

  906. them, get these things out of here.

  907. Stop turning my father's house into a marketplace.

  908. Then his disciples, remember this prophecy from the

  909. Scriptures. Passion for God's house will

  910. consume me. That's from Psalm 69, verse 9,

    Psalms 69:9

  911. in case you're curious. So here's the thing, I had

  912. somebody ask me like, are you comfortable selling T-shirts at

  913. church? Yes, I'm comfortable selling

  914. T-shirts at church. What we do is we break even and

  915. we tell you where the money's going to go.

  916. It's going to go into a ministry.

  917. These are people that were looking at people's spiritual

  918. journey and finding a way to turn a profit.

  919. They were being spiritual entrepreneurs, not trying to

  920. service people of faith and provide a need.

  921. They were trying to gain and try to to grow their own funds from

  922. it. OK, big difference.

  923. John places this event near the beginning of Jesus's ministry,

  924. and it's very interesting because he sees a place that was

  925. designed for prayer to be a marketplace.

  926. It wasn't just that the temple or it was near there.

  927. This was literally a portion of the temple that was set aside

  928. for prayer. And when he showed up to this

  929. place expecting to pray, instead, what he saw was, hey,

  930. don't trust that guy. That guy's got a bad deal.

  931. I've got a better deal on cattle for you or people that will

  932. exchange your currency so you can be made right with the Lord

  933. for a price. These people are not doing

  934. things that are designed to help others grow closer to the Lord.

  935. They're doing things to actually make themselves be a barrier

  936. between somebody and accessing the Lord.

  937. Because if they're the barrier and you have to go through them,

  938. then they get to charge a price. Sounds pretty ugly when you put

  939. it that way, right? Some people stop reading right

  940. there and they say, see, Jesus got mad.

  941. Sometimes it's so much more than that because this wasn't an

  942. emotional outburst. This was a deliberate act.

  943. And if you were wondering about that, then why did he do it

  944. again three years later? Matthew 21, starting in verse

  945. 12, it sounds so similar. It says Jesus entered the temple

  946. and began to drive out all the people buying and selling

  947. animals for sacrifice. He knocked over the tables of

  948. the money changers and the chairs of those selling doves

  949. and he said to them, the scriptures declare my temple

  950. will be called a House of prayer, but you have turned it

  951. into a den of thieves. Now listen to this.

  952. This is just days before he would end up having his mock

  953. trial and get crucified. After this, it says the blind

  954. and the lame came to him in the temple, in the temple and he

  955. healed them. The leading priests and the

  956. teachers of religious law, they saw these wonderful miracles and

  957. heard even the children in the temple shouting praise God for

  958. the Son of David. But the leaders were indignant.

  959. That's a fancy way of saying angry.

  960. They asked Jesus, do you hear what these children are saying?

  961. Yes, Jesus replied, haven't you ever read the Scriptures?

  962. For they say you have taught children and infants to give you

  963. praise. And then he returned to Bethany

  964. where he stayed overnight. So now we're here at the end of

  965. Jesus's mystery or ministry, and you can see that three years

  966. have passed. His heart has not changed.

  967. He still refuses to allow God's house to be a place where people

  968. are exploited instead of welcomed.

  969. And just before we talked about these people who are putting

  970. themselves between the Lord and, and their lives, they were

  971. becoming the middle man. And then you have, if anybody

  972. could be a middle man for the Lord, it's Jesus.

  973. Is he not our, our great counsellor?

  974. He is our great conduit. He's the one that became sin so

  975. that you and I could be looked at as the righteousness of God.

  976. He is our advocate. He is the one who goes to bat

  977. for us. And you know what he does?

  978. He pushes all the false middle men out of the way.

  979. And it says right after that it said the blind and the lame

  980. started coming to him in the temple.

  981. Jesus didn't just clear the temple so he could make a point.

  982. He cleared the temple so that broken people could get back to

  983. God again. And that's the difference

  984. between righteous anger and self-righteous anger.

  985. If you get angry about something that's been violated, but it's

  986. because your ego has been violated, there will be nothing

  987. that makes reconciliation or restoration happen.

  988. It will not be a benefit for them or for you.

  989. If you can say, man, I love you, but this wasn't right and I need

  990. you to know that and you can still work towards restoration.

  991. There's a lot of God in that act.

  992. And you might say, well, that's difficult.

  993. I don't know if I could do that. Yeah, I know it's difficult, but

  994. God frequently leads us into places where we need him or we

  995. can't do it. I wonder how many of our angry

  996. moments would look different if we asked that same question

  997. before we responded. Instead of saying, how do I get

  998. even or how do I make sure that they know I'm hurting?

  999. What if we just said, how can the situation move me one step

  1000. closer to you? God, before we move on, I have

  1001. asked for two volunteers and I promised I wouldn't embarrass

  1002. them too much. So, Dennis, George, aren't you

  1003. coming up here? What we have here is a rope that

  1004. is normally used to help the little guys help the help the

  1005. kids, you know, as they manage their way up and down the hall

  1006. and they don't get lost. They hold on to this rope.

  1007. Well, we're going to do a little classic game of tug of war,

  1008. right? But don't start until I tell you

  1009. to, right? So this is what's really

  1010. important. I don't want you to go until I

  1011. say go, but you can round it up. Do whatever you need to.

  1012. You got to prep. Do not knock over these false

  1013. plants, right? You're not the one that will pay

  1014. for that. I am.

  1015. So don't do that, OK? You guys plant your feet and

  1016. you're ready. You see this little black line

  1017. right here? Let's make sure that's about as

  1018. middle as possible. If you cross that line, then

  1019. you're the one that loses. OK, Ready.

  1020. Set. Hang on.

  1021. Can you lean the other way? Brace with the other foot?

  1022. I don't like it. Give me this.

  1023. All right, We're going to do something different.

  1024. All right? Do y'all want to see how to win

  1025. any argument? You want to see how to how to

  1026. win? All right, I'm going to show you

  1027. this. Take notes on this.

  1028. All right Dennis, head over there.

  1029. Yep, grab it with George. I'm going to show you how to

  1030. win. Tell me when y'all are ready.

  1031. All right, you see that black spot right there, right?

  1032. OK, ready. Set Go.

  1033. I won. Let me show you why.

  1034. I'm just going to give you guys names here, OK?

  1035. All right? Right here.

  1036. This is an insult, OK? And right here.

  1037. This is a lack of appreciation. OK?

  1038. Now, just for an illustration. OK, guys, now listen, here's the

  1039. thing. In life, these are going to

  1040. happen to you. And as soon as somebody insults

  1041. you, what do you want to do back?

  1042. Insult them back? When somebody then doesn't

  1043. appreciate you, how do you respond?

  1044. Maybe it's a cold shoulder. Maybe it's a oh, I'll make them

  1045. ask. Well, that'll show them.

  1046. You could just say I felt unappreciated when you did that.

  1047. Hey, man, that actually wasn't too funny to me.

  1048. But every time one of these things pulls on you, you've got

  1049. the impulse to pull back. And here's what ends up

  1050. happening over time. You're stuck in this tug of war

  1051. with somebody else. Both of your dashboard lights

  1052. are on. Neither of your cars are fixed.

  1053. So you're just going to keep going until just like my old

  1054. Chrysler Lebaron, and all of a sudden, something is so broken,

  1055. you never drive it again. But instead, we don't fight

  1056. back. I'm just not going to engage in

  1057. it anymore. I can express when something

  1058. bothers me, and I'd love for you to attend to it.

  1059. I wish you'd appreciate me more, George.

  1060. I wish you stopped insulting me. Dennis.

  1061. Right. OK, I'm just kidding.

  1062. These are good men. That's why I asked them to do

  1063. this. Can you thank them for helping

  1064. me today? OK.

  1065. I really hyped it up for them. I was like, I need somebody

  1066. who's willing to, like, fall down because you might not win.

  1067. And they're like, I'll win. Really set them up there.

  1068. Here's the thing. One of the hardest things about

  1069. anger is that in the moment, every response feels justified.

  1070. And maybe you would say, well, I wouldn't hurl an insult back.

  1071. OK, so you wouldn't. So let's say the insult who will

  1072. not be named insults you. And you say I'm too good to

  1073. insult them back. But instead what you do is you

  1074. go over to your friend and you're like, let me tell you

  1075. about this Jack wagon. Let me tell you about what they

  1076. did. You go to somebody who's going

  1077. to understand you and get it, and you just start bad mouthing

  1078. them. Here's the problem.

  1079. You're still pulling your tug of war is with anger.

  1080. It's not with another person. We don't war against flesh and

  1081. blood. The enemy's out there using

  1082. people as a human shield, and he's trying to divide you.

  1083. And as long as you're willing to play the game, you're going to

  1084. win the prize. But it's a stupid game, so you

  1085. get stupid prizes. Here's a couple questions you

  1086. can ask. What outcome am I hoping for?

  1087. That's the question. Jesus Wood Forest you to wrestle

  1088. with. Are you trying to restore the

  1089. relationship when you get angry, or are you just trying to make

  1090. the other person hurt the way you hurt because you don't like

  1091. that they hurt you? Are you hoping that you'll

  1092. understand one another better when the conversation is over?

  1093. Or are you looking for the line, like the one line you can say

  1094. where it's like, oh man, I got my cinematic moment and I won

  1095. this argument. Second question is, will this

  1096. response make tomorrow easier or harder?

  1097. I took that car for granted. I had that car for a while, but

  1098. not as long as I could have. One of my cars with that paint

  1099. peeling off's got about 220,000 miles on it and it runs like a

  1100. charm. I'll tell you what I don't do.

  1101. I don't miss the oil change because if you want something to

  1102. last, you have to treat it well and you have to take care of it.

  1103. Otherwise you may say, well, today it just feels good.

  1104. Today I just need to say this, OK?

  1105. But tomorrow will be when you deal with it and probably next

  1106. week, maybe even next year. One of the things I really

  1107. admire about Jesus, and there are many, is that even the way

  1108. that he confronted people was so loving.

  1109. He he left room for repentance. You remember when he confronted

  1110. Peter, but also restored Peter. He confronted the woman caught

  1111. in adultery and then restored her dignity and then said now go

  1112. and sin no more. He confronted temple leaders

  1113. because he wanted God's house to be restored.

  1114. That would have been good for the religious leaders as well as

  1115. the common folk of the day. I think if we just carried these

  1116. kind of questions into our homes and our marriages and our

  1117. workplaces and our friendships, even our conversations online,

  1118. we would find ourselves looking a whole lot more like Jesus.

  1119. The last question is this. Can I say this in a way that

  1120. leaves the door open? What is it about Jesus you ever

  1121. noticed every time he confronted somebody with sin, they were

  1122. never mad at him? Well, not every time.

  1123. The internal sins, those were different.

  1124. See, he could confront somebody who had just been caught in

  1125. adultery. He could confront somebody in

  1126. their anger or their pride or whatever.

  1127. And it worked when somebody was submitted to Jesus.

  1128. But then when the religious leaders got called out, they got

  1129. very upset. They actually doubled down on

  1130. their anger because of it. But Jesus had a way of talking

  1131. to people who genuinely wanted to know God, and even though he

  1132. told them something hard, they were closer to God because of

  1133. it. That's righteous anger.

  1134. You know why Jesus hates your sin?

  1135. Because it is between you and him.

  1136. Jesus would turn those tables. Jesus would flip them over.

  1137. Jesus would do just about anything to get him out of the

  1138. way. The question is, would you help

  1139. him? Would you get mad enough that

  1140. you'd be able to chase out, grab a whip and chase out anything

  1141. that is between you and the Lord?

  1142. Restoring people's access to the Lord was that important to Him.

  1143. And for us, we're just like, well-being angry is part of

  1144. life. It is, but it's not supposed to

  1145. end at anger. Remember, it's just a warning

  1146. light. We come to the end of this

  1147. message. I I just think one of the

  1148. biggest mistakes we can make is to believe that this sermon is

  1149. just about losing your temper. It's not.

  1150. If that's all Jesus wanted to address, then most of us

  1151. probably would leave feeling pretty good about ourselves

  1152. because again, we had many of us put our hands up when we said we

  1153. struggle with anger, but most people wouldn't know about it.

  1154. We could all think of somebody who gets angrier than we do,

  1155. can't we? Someone who yells more, somebody

  1156. whose temper is more explosive. But I don't have this in your

  1157. notes, but it's a bonus scripture.

  1158. You're welcome. No charge.

  1159. Matthew, chapter 5, starting in verse 21.

    Matthew 5 chapter mention

  1160. I don't just want to summarize it.

  1161. I really want to read this to you.

  1162. Jesus teaches this. He says, you've heard that our

  1163. ancestors were told you must not murder.

  1164. If you commit murder, you are subject to judgement.

  1165. By the way, I've never had pushed back on that.

  1166. OK, verse 22. But I say if you are even angry

  1167. with someone, you're subject to judgement.

  1168. If you call someone an idiot, you are in danger of being

  1169. brought before the court. And if you curse someone, you

  1170. are in danger of the fires of hell.

  1171. You might be like, I don't curse people, I'm not a witch.

  1172. Calm down. Nobody was saying you were a

  1173. witch. What's the difference?

  1174. A curse is speaking negatively in a way that is designed to

  1175. tear them down. When you go to somebody and all

  1176. you have are negative things to say about them, you're cursing

  1177. them. We call them curse words, but

  1178. they're really cuss words when you talk about taking the Lord's

  1179. name in vain. It has nothing to do with modern

  1180. vernacular. Cursing is using your God-given

  1181. ability to speak things into existence for evil, and anytime

  1182. you do that, you're cursing them.

  1183. Jesus knew what he was talking about.

  1184. And then he says this. I'll be honest, more than once I

  1185. have wished he did not say this. So if you're presenting A

  1186. sacrifice at the altar in the temple, and you suddenly

  1187. remember that someone has something against you, leave

  1188. your sacrifice there at the altar.

  1189. Go and be reconciled to that person.

  1190. Then come and offer your sacrifice to God.

  1191. Modern equivalent. You're in the middle of that

  1192. song you love so much this morning, and then you remember

  1193. somebody's upset with you, not you're upset with somebody.

  1194. Somebody might be upset with you.

  1195. He says you stop before you get to that bridge.

  1196. You like singing so much. You walk on over to them and

  1197. say, we need to make this right. We need to give it our best

  1198. shot. Well, I don't want you.

  1199. That's going to be uncomfortable talk.

  1200. Oh, yeah, it is. But I'm hoping that on the other

  1201. side of it, you and I are closer to the Lord and hopefully closer

  1202. to each other. That's why we do the whole

  1203. conflict means conversation thing in this church, he says.

  1204. When you're on the way to court with your adversary, settle your

  1205. differences quickly. Otherwise, your accuser may hand

  1206. you over to the judge, who will hand you over to an officer and

  1207. you'll be thrown into prison. And if that happens, you surely

  1208. won't be free again until you paid the last penny.

  1209. Do you know how radical this would have sounded to the people

  1210. listening? They had always measured

  1211. righteousness by outside actions, giving enough, serving

  1212. enough, lighting the incense at the right time, obeying the

  1213. Sabbath, doing the right Jewish festivals and feasts and doing

  1214. all of these different things. And as he's saying, you've heard

  1215. it said not to murder. I got to think there's at least

  1216. one person that was like, are you saying there's a way?

  1217. He says yeah, not only should you not murder, don't hold on to

  1218. anger because you're subject to judgement.

  1219. It's possible. Jesus says the murder doesn't

  1220. start with a weapon. It starts in the heart.

  1221. Now listen, and This is why this matters when I say we've all

  1222. thought like, well, I wouldn't get to that point.

  1223. Murder is the final destination of a heart that has learned to

  1224. devalue another human being. And you may say, like, I don't

  1225. think I'm going to get to that point.

  1226. You probably won't. But you're on the path.

  1227. Do you? Do you want to be on that path?

  1228. Jesus mentions in this same scripture.

  1229. Highlight it, go back to it, read it later.

  1230. He mentions in the same section anger, insults, and contempt.

  1231. You know why? Because he's tracking the

  1232. progression of where anger goes when it's left alone.

  1233. Don't leave your anger light on your dashboard.

  1234. Jesus is not saying that anger and murder carry the same

  1235. consequences. He's saying that they grow from

  1236. the same root. Pull it up while it's young.

  1237. The last thing I would tell you is what Paul teaches in the book

  1238. of Ephesians. He's writing to the church in

  1239. Ephesus and he says this. Don't let sin anger or don't let

  1240. don't sin by letting anger control you.

  1241. Don't let the sun go down on you while you're still angry, for

  1242. anger gives a foothold to the devil.

  1243. You hear this a lot of times at weddings, don't you?

  1244. A lot of times we get advice from the older couples that have

  1245. been married for a long time and they'll say don't go to bad mad

  1246. and all of that. And it's a good, it's a good

  1247. idea. It's not a legalistic

  1248. requirement. And I want you to know that you

  1249. may get to the place that you are no longer able to come to a

  1250. resolution. You've gone round and round as

  1251. long as you can say, look, we're going to get up in the morning

  1252. and we're going to have a shower and we're going to eat food and

  1253. we're going to be well fed and we're not going to be cranky.

  1254. We're not going to be hungry, angry, lonely or tired in this

  1255. moment. We're going to do our best to

  1256. work through this. Then it's OK.

  1257. This is a saying. It's saying don't let the sunset

  1258. on something that needs to be resolved.

  1259. So we just had the Harrier program go through sunset.

  1260. Correct. And you know what that means?

  1261. No more Harriers. It means it's over.

  1262. Don't let the sun go down. Don't close the door on a

  1263. relationship with somebody while you're still angry.

  1264. Get some resolution. That resolution may have you

  1265. more distant from them, and it might not.

  1266. Don't let the sun go down. Why?

  1267. Because it gives a foothold to the devil.

  1268. Problem is, most of us are like, yeah, it's just a foothold.

  1269. Eventually I'll scoot that foot out of there.

  1270. I'll get that door shut. I'll slam it on the devil's

  1271. foot. I heard one kid say one time,

  1272. OK, he's probably got cloven hooves, you're going to have to

  1273. slam it really hard. Why would you give him an inch?

  1274. He's got nothing else to do but ruin your life.

  1275. Why would you give him a foothold?

  1276. Paul doesn't pretend you're not going to be angry.

  1277. He doesn't say don't allow anything to make you angry.

  1278. He just says don't let anger control you again.

  1279. Abuse should make us angry. Exploitation should make us

  1280. angry. Evil should make us angry.

  1281. Sometimes I watch the news and I get angry.

  1282. Maybe it's just me, but Paul's not teaching that every conflict

  1283. can be resolved before bedtime. It's just that anger can't be a

  1284. permanent resident. So the challenge is to refuse to

  1285. let anger become your identity or your master.

  1286. Would you all stand up? I want to pray with you guys

  1287. today. I specifically feel like the

  1288. Lord wanted me to just pray with everybody today.

  1289. When that warning light comes on, I'm just telling you,

  1290. investigate it. If there's a boundary that's

  1291. been crossed, pursue reconciliation.

  1292. If it's your pride that's been wounded, try to eat some humble

  1293. pie. Try to get something.

  1294. Just address whatever's happening underneath it.

  1295. As we go through these sins, I just want to remind you, this

  1296. series is all about sins that the church normalizes or allows.

  1297. And I'm not talking about our church.

  1298. I'm talking about any church. A lot of us were like, well, you

  1299. have every right to be mad. You should be working to help

  1300. them be at peace and not angry. You should be working to be at

  1301. peace and not angry. You've got a clearer head when

  1302. you're not driven by anger. Next week we're going to talk

  1303. about judge mentalism. It's the sin that we call

  1304. discernment. Discernment's important, but not

  1305. everything that you think is a problem is a problem.

  1306. Sometimes we're just judgy Christians.

  1307. But As for today, and we've got some heavy places to go this

  1308. fall, guys, we're not going to be able to carry our sin into

  1309. it. Let's lay it at the foot of the

  1310. cross together. Amen.

  1311. God, we ask for you to just descend.

  1312. We've just wanted your spirit all morning.

  1313. I believe that where your perfect love is, it casts out

  1314. all fear. So God, we come against any fear

  1315. that drives us to anger. God, let us go forward with

  1316. confidence, not that everything will go perfectly, but that you

  1317. will be with us and we will make it through to the other side of

  1318. whatever we face. Don't let us be shaped or scared

  1319. of the what ifs that are going to happen.

  1320. Let us be shaped and formed by the confidence that we walk with

  1321. the God of all creation with us. God, for those of us with old

  1322. wounds, give us the right avenues to heal them.

  1323. Give us the right people, the right places to talk through

  1324. them so that we can get healed and whole.

  1325. We know that you desire that even more than we do, and God,

  1326. would you just use us to help the healing speed up in the

  1327. lives of those around us. God, for those of us that we

  1328. have been angry because of our pride, help us be humbled.

  1329. Help us be humbled. And I don't mean let bad things

  1330. happen to us to knock us down. I mean, God, would you just

  1331. teach us to think of ourselves less?

  1332. Would you just teach us to see the big picture?

  1333. Would you teach us to see the whole Kingdom in a way that

  1334. really motivates us more than looking out for #1 And finally,

  1335. God, I just come against any exhaustion for those that are

  1336. tired. God, I know that this is

  1337. normally a hybrid. So I ask that you would teach us

  1338. wise ways to live our life so that we don't run ourselves

  1339. ragged. But at the same time, would you

  1340. teach us spiritually and emotionally and mentally just to

  1341. lay things before you? God, when we are worn out by

  1342. something, even a good thing, there's something that's wrong.

  1343. God, let us be tired from doing good works, but don't let us be

  1344. exhausted. Let us always have fresh energy

  1345. and fresh vision and fresh wind from you and Father for the

  1346. boundaries that have been crossed, for the things that we

  1347. have done and the things that have been done to us.

  1348. We just ask that you just envelope us with the spirit of

  1349. forgiveness. Let us forgive ourselves for the

  1350. things that we've done and let us forgive others, not because

  1351. we feel like everything that's happened was OK, but God just

  1352. give us the peace to move forward that we don't have to

  1353. take what happened yesterday into tomorrow.

  1354. It can be a fresh start. Thank you for your mercies that

  1355. are new every morning. And it's in the name of Jesus

  1356. that everybody said Amen.