Living Beyond Yourself

Did you know that there are five different schools named for Kingsland members?

As far as I know.

Schaefer Elementary School, Adams Middle School, Campbell Elementary School, Bryant Elementary School, and Butowig Elementary School, all named for Kingsland members.

That's really amazing to me.

A few years ago, we named the Omar and Cheryl Garcia Community Center, the building across the street, because of the legacy that they're leaving through missions.

And it's an amazing thing, I think, to have your name on a building.

Most of us will never have buildings named after us.

The closest I'll ever come is maybe my name written on a bathroom wall.

That's about as close as it'll come.

Most of us won't have our names on buildings, but all of us, every one of us, is building a legacy that will outlive us.

What legacy will you leave?

How will you be remembered?

We've been in a series called Shaped at Home for six weeks, and we're going to close it out today talking about legacy.

Would you turn in your Bibles to Genesis chapter 50 today?

Genesis 50 · chapter mention

Genesis chapter 50.

Genesis 50 · chapter mention

This series, as we said from the beginning, has been focused on the hearts of our men, but the text that we've looked at all through, and that's certainly the text today, applies to every one of us here.

And so that continues.

Let me say here, men who are within the sound of my voice, I want to invite you to be at our men's rally this Thursday evening at 6.30 p.m.

from 6.30 to 9.

We'll gather in the worship center.

It's going to be an amazing time.

Listen, some of you guys have not been able to be a part of the incredible stuff that's happened on Wednesdays for the last six weeks.

You still want to be here as we close it out.

I look forward to that time together.

And not to be outdone, ladies, this Friday evening, we have overflow, a really special event for our ladies.

All the information is online for both of those, and I hope you'll let us know that you're coming.

But every one of us is leaving something behind.

Listen, here's what surprises some people legacy is not what you intend to leave behind.

Legacy is what you're actually leaving behind through your habits, whether that's time at the dinner table or how you handle it, when you've been wronged, or what your kids watch you do when you think nobody's looking.

That's the legacy that you're leaving.

And so, some background on this, in case you haven't been here and you're new, uh we looked in the very beginning in chapter 37, a 17-year-old boy who'd had a pretty uh rough time growing up, some really difficult circumstances, and then he had some unimaginable pain in that year and the years following.

And yet he handed those to God, and God was able to take the pain and turn it around and use it in an extraordinary way.

And so, yes, he was shaped at home, but he was shaped in a way that when he looked backward, he recognized even through the pain, God was using that pain for his good.

And so today we find the last scene in the account, chapter 50.

Joseph's father Jacob dies, and the brothers who are with him now become convinced that maybe Joseph wasn't killing them or punishing them just because he was showing mercy to their dad.

And now that dad was out of the way, the hammer was about to come down, and so they they sent a message to Joseph begging for mercy.

And the text says that Joseph actually weeps when he hears about this message.

And I think he weeps because after years of eating at his table, they still don't know him.

They're still waiting for the other shoe to drop.

And what he says next in these three verses today is one of the most complete pictures of a man's legacy in all of Scripture.

In fact, I think this is the central passage in how a legacy can be shaped at home, no matter the circumstances, and that legacy applies to every person within the sound of my voice, every man or woman, every child, you're gonna leave a legacy.

So we find the answer in Genesis 50, reading verses 19 through 21.

Would you look on as I read?

But Joseph said to them, Don't be afraid.

Am I in the place of God?

You planned evil against me.

God planned it for good to bring about the present result, the survival of many people.

Therefore, don't be afraid.

I will take care of you and your children.

And he comforted them and spoke kindly to them.

Do you see the power in that passage?

In that passage, just that one passage, those three verses, God shows us three decisions that every one of us have to make if we are to leave a lasting, impactful, positive legacy.

May I share those decisions with you?

Here's the first decision that has to be made.

First, you have to decide to set aside entitlement.

I want you to understand something about leadership that could change the way you lead your family or your business or certainly your home.

Anybody God's entrusted to your care needs you to hear this.

The authority or the power that you have been given is not just for your benefit.

The greatest leaders are the ones who exercise the most power by helping others, not just wielding the most power to benefit themselves.

Too many people confuse authority with influence.

They are not the same.

Strong legacies are left behind with people who recognize God's power in their life is there to help others, not themselves.

Joseph was arguably the most powerful man in Egypt, apart from Pharaoh.

Maybe the second most powerful man in the world at this time.

He controlled the resources, he made the key decisions, and he exercised authority over millions of people.

If anybody had the right to exercise his power in bringing justice to his brothers, it was Joseph.

He had the power, but Joseph understood something.

And rather than reminding his brothers how powerful he has become, he reminds them how powerful God is.

Look back at verse 19.

But Joseph said to them, Don't be afraid.

Am I in the place of God?

In other words, Joseph's on a throne, but he's not really the one in power.

Do you see?

He knows that.

Joseph could have used his position to settle an old score, but he knew having the power to make somebody pay doesn't mean God's given you permission to do it.

And Joseph knew the difference between authority that he had and God's authority, which was far superior.

And that's the reality of a man who leaves a legacy.

Do you see?

He knows the difference between his seat and God's seat.

There is a myth that somehow continues to pervade our culture that a leader is a person who runs roughshod over the people around them.

And those people might get a few things done for a little while, but it does not last.

Doesn't leave a legacy.

John Maxwell distinguishes between leaders of position and leaders of respect.

And we all know the difference.

If you've ever had a job, right?

Positional leaders are only followed because people have the authority over them.

They have to follow.

Otherwise, there's going to be reward or punishment.

There's going to be maybe a pay raise or maybe a pink slip, but nothing in between.

And how long does that type of leadership last?

Just as long as you have that kind of power.

Respected leaders, however, are followed because people trust and admire them.

There's a huge difference.

Entitlement asks, what do these people owe me?

And servant leadership asks, what has God entrusted under me that I can help through my actions and my decisions?

You see the difference?

Mom and dad, this certainly applies to parenting.

Man does it ever.

We have a core value at Kings and we call empowered homes, recognizing that the moms and dads are the primary faith trainers of their kids.

And I've been reminded this week of one particular article that we keep coming back to on empoweredhomes.org.

And we call the four phases of parenting.

It's really important to understand that our roles as parents change as kids grow.

The four phases of parenting, it starts with the uh the caregiver.

First few years of life, all you're doing as a mom or a dad is just keeping them alive, right?

You have to do everything.

And then you move, transition to that role of a cop.

And that's in the best sense of the word.

You're protecting and serving.

You're the one that's setting boundaries and establishing consequences when necessary.

That's really good parenting for that season, but it shouldn't stay there because you should start transitioning, depending on the kid, but somewhere between 12, around 12 to age 18, you become the coach.

What does a coach do?

A coach doesn't go into the game, the coach stands on the sidelines, allows for natural consequences to take place, cheers on the victory.

Every now and you bring them over, you give them a pat on the rear end and say, Hey, you got to have a pep talk here.

Things got to get better.

And you send them out to deal with things on their own while they still have you watching over them.

And that doesn't even remain the same because eventually, as children enter into adulthood, you move into the role of consultant.

That's one of the most difficult things to do, really.

Why?

Because you don't have the power at that point.

I've seen too many parents still trying to be traffic cops to 35-year-old children, and it doesn't work.

Because what happens?

You don't have any consequences other than to take away the Netflix password.

What can you do?

I find it really ironic when you think about that chart that we're called consultants because in that season, uh, don't consultants get paid?

I haven't met the parent of an adult child that's getting that's making money off of the deal.

So our job isn't just to wield power, do you see, to make them behave.

It's not just to make ourselves feel better because we're in control.

That's not what it's for.

You are guiding their hearts, do you see?

And you have to be willing to exchange control for influence, making your child's heart the priority.

And what's true of parenting is true for all of leadership.

I think about John 13.

Jesus Christ knew he had all authority in heaven and earth.

And what did he do?

He picked up a towel and he washed the feet of his disciples.

Not because he was weak, but because he was secure and powerful, and he wielded his power by serving.

That's the example.

God's glory is the objective.

And when God's aim is to help us, empower us to empower others, you see how everything changes.

What would it look like this week if you set aside your rights and use the power and authority that's been given you to help those around you become who they need to be?

Wouldn't that be something?

That's how legacies form, do you see?

It starts in that way.

You set aside uh what you believe you have a right to.

You set aside entitlement.

But that's not all.

If we want to leave a lasting legacy, we move to the second decision that Joseph does in this passage.

And it's been really the heart of what we talked about for the last few weeks.

You're gonna have to decide to repurpose your pain.

Some of us have scars, don't we?

Some scars might remind us of times where we were bold and did something heroic.

Some scars might remind us of times right before they happened, our wives said, Are you sure this is a good idea?

But do we have scars?

And it's interesting.

You can have you can look at a scar and it can remind you of the worst day of your life.

Or you can look at a scar and you can have gratitude because it reminds you that the worst day of your life wasn't the last day of your life.

Those are really good scars.

Same scars, different perspective.

And that's what we've seen to be true throughout this entire passage.

That's what it means to be redeemed.

Do you see?

We look backward and we recognize there's some painful stuff, but God can use that pain.

It will give it to him.

And he turns it around and uses it for his glory.

Now I want you to look what happened in Genesis 50, 20, the passage we've looked at over and over again.

Joseph looks at his brothers and he says, You planned evil against me.

God planned it for good to bring about the present result, the survival of many people.

Joseph never called evil good here.

Do you notice that?

He simply recognized that evil didn't get the last word.

There's a difference.

And here's something I love about what Joseph says here, and I love how the Holy Spirit writes this down for us.

The same verb is used in both halves of the sentence.

Watch this.

You planned it, God planned it.

You planned it, God planned it.

Which one?

You see that?

It's the same event with two authors.

Both were true, and the redemption came from holding both intention.

It didn't come from saying, oh, that was not that big a deal.

No, it was a huge deal.

It hurt.

But then to look back and say, look what God did.

Look what God wrote over the top of that story into my story.

That's what happened here.

Let me tell you something that may shock you.

God often uses your deepest hurts for your greatest ministry if you will let him.

Dr.

Jim Dennison has asserted that God redeems all that he allows.

And I believe with all my heart that's true.

That's not the same thing as thinking that tragedy or heartache is something we live through and we're just supposed to look on the bright side.

No, it's that God will take it if you let him.

And you'll turn it around and redeem even the deepest pain.

And history is full of stories of people who looked at their tragedies and recognized that God could use them because of the tragedies, not despite the tragedies.

I think about Frederick Douglass, born into slavery, who used his painful experiences to become a powerful voice for American freedom.

And I think about Corey Tin Boom, who suffered in a Nazi concentration camp and went on to share the message of forgiveness and hope to millions around the world.

Or I think about John Newton, a former slave trader who was so transformed by the good news of Jesus that he invested his life in ministry and wrote down the words, what?

Amazing grace.

All three of those had experiences that could have totally derailed their lives and left them as just messes to be cleaned up by the pages of history.

That's not what happened, right?

Because they brought those pains to God and the Lord redeemed them.

So they were shaped at home, and God took all those things and said, Yes, they were shaped at home for my glory and for their good.

You see, Joseph, Joseph's brothers saw nothing but a pit.

God looked at the pit and saw a plan for generations to be changed.

That's what happens.

That's what God can do with a surrendered life.

What pain in your life might be used for ministry if you handed it to God and you trusted him with it?

Maybe something way back in your past you don't like to think about, maybe something going on right now.

But if you allow him, the Spirit of God will take it and he'll use it.

Don't let pain be wasted.

You want to leave a profound legacy.

You have all the tools to do it.

Joseph shows us here.

What you're gonna have to do first is set aside entitlement, and second, you're gonna have to invite the Lord to repurpose your pain.

And if you're willing to do those two, you make those decisions, now it leads to a new decision.

It can absolutely transform everything that happens from here on out.

Here's the third decision.

Then God calls us to think generationally.

I think one of the great mistakes most of us make is we think way too short term.

We're constantly thinking about the urgent.

What's gonna happen tomorrow, the next day, or next week, or next year?

And what would happen if we started to think in terms of what's gonna happen 10,000 years from now because God put us here right now?

What's gonna happen for eternity because of maybe the pain that we've experienced now?

Watch this in verse 21.

Because Joseph doesn't settle for letting his brothers off the hook or even just repurposing the pain in his life for something good.

He's looking to the future, and when I say the future, I mean long after he's gone.

Look back at the verse.

Therefore, don't be afraid, Joseph says.

I will take care of you and watch this and your children.

And he comforted them and spoke kindly to them.

Joseph was determined that his brother's failures would not become their children's inheritance.

Can you imagine the power of that moment of recognizing that the decisions he's making now aren't just going to impact the next decade during the famine?

They're gonna impact the rest of their lives and their sons' lives and their daughters' lives and their lives and their children's lives and on and on long after he's gone.

And thinking generationally is asking more than what kind of life am I living?

Do you see the difference?

It's asking, how will my life impact those who come after me?

And so the pains of your past don't become your children's inheritance.

Your family's brokenness doesn't have to become your family's future.

Do you see?

By the grace of God, you can begin a different legacy.

And everything changes when you start thinking that way.

We started this series telling the story about Cambodian pastors that so inspired me, started to pray about what to share with you here in Genesis.

Remember, the Cambodian pastors uh had some of the most incredibly hard childhoods you could possibly imagine, and yet they were some of the greatest leaders that we found because they were almost all first generation Christians in that largely Buddhist nation.

And now there are hundreds of thousands of followers of Jesus Christ in the nation of Cambodia.

Did you know that Cambodia's been at war with Thailand?

You've probably seen it at the very back of the news some nights.

It's been heart-wrenching.

And so many of these Christians have been activated and mobilized to share the hope of Jesus Christ in a very dark time in the nation of Cambodia.

And so they have these refugee camps all over the country because many along the border have been displaced through the war.

And so the Christian church is still a large minority of the of the nation, have mobilized and gone in to share and meet needs.

The government has actually brought some given them some land in the refugee camps to serve.

And they said, listen, you realize we're going to share Jesus when we're in there.

They said, we don't care if you'll help meet the needs.

Dr.

Steve Hyde is here with us today.

He was in an earlier service, and I got to say hello.

He'll be in the halls later.

Uh if you see him, say hello.

We're so grateful to partner with Steve Hyde and his ministry to the Cambodians, along with his wife, Noit.

It's an incredible ministry, but they've been in these camps in the darkest of circumstances, and guess what's happened?

They've gotten to share the hope of Jesus in the midst of the mess.

And he said, in one particular camp, as far as they could tell, when they first came in there, there were six followers of Jesus.

And he said, this morning, as we gather here, there are 4,000 followers of Jesus.

And I wonder if you can't.

That doesn't happen unless you think beyond the next 10 minutes, or you think beyond all that's going on, the urgency of the moment.

Do you see?

In our men's study, we've been talking about the freedom for.

And I called it the freedom for because these are the attributes that God wired you, created you to exhibit in your life back in the Garden of Eden.

That's what we were created for, until the fall.

And God can redeem them and bring them right back.

We talked about security and direction and connection and boldness.

Do you know that all four of those attributes reside in Joseph's life?

All four of those attributes shaped his legacy.

Security.

You see, Joseph no longer needed his brother's approval or revenge.

God gave him direction.

He interpreted his suffering through God's greater purposes, and because of that, he was able to bless his brothers and give them direction through that blessing.

Connection.

He restored relationships with those who'd hurt him.

And boldness.

Joseph used his influence to impact generations to come.

And that's what God will do for us.

The freedom for is what it takes to make an impact.

And I want you to notice something about the freedom for.

Can we put that up one more time?

Because if you've been around Kingston for very long, you might notice that that starts to look familiar.

This is something we've talked about for a long time.

Remember the four habits?

Rest, bless, gather, go.

That's how we respond.

That's how we live according to freedom for.

We rest in the security that comes from Jesus Christ.

We bless those around them.

The greatest way to give direction, establish direction to those nearest us.

We gather together and so we build connection, meaningful connection with those in our midst, and we don't settle for that.

We go beyond.

And that requires boldness, do you see?

This is of such major importance to the church in general, and certainly of our church specifically, because we love that we get to gather and sing great songs and hopefully listen to some decent messages and study God's word together.

All that stuff is great.

But do you understand that's not the end goal of why we're here?

God has left us here to go into the world and preach the gospel and make disciples, baptizing them.

We're supposed to be here so that we're sent boldly into the world to go beyond and make an impact.

And so the freedom for shows up when we gather at the table for meaningful mealtimes.

The freedom for shows up when we're at the office or the school or the neighborhood, and we share the hope of Jesus with those seven people that God has put on our hearts.

Do you see?

God has more for us than just settling for anything that happens.

Only in the here and now.

In fact, look down at Genesis chapter 50 one more time, verses 24 and 25.

Genesis 50 · chapter mention

Because I love the way this ends.

Joseph is dying.

He got to live to 110, y'all.

He got to see three generations.

He's dying, but he's still dreaming.

And so it says, Joseph said to his brothers, I'm about to die, but God will certainly come to your aid and bring you up from this land to the land he swore to give to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.

So Joseph made the sons of Israel take an oath.

When God comes to your aid, you are to carry my bones up from here.

I love that passage because right in the middle it has the word when.

Do you see that?

He says, I know God's going to keep his promises, and he doesn't say, now if this works out, would you carry my bones back up to Israel?

No, he says, when it happens, when God keeps his promise, don't leave me here.

Carry my bones to the promised land.

And that's exactly what took place.

Even in his dying breath, you understand?

Joseph was thinking about something that would far outlive him.

He was going to be on a journey that only his bones would take.

How cool is that?

And that's really the question, isn't it?

Like, what in my life right now is going to outlive me?

And what in my life is sapping my energy that really doesn't matter for eternity.

God has shaped you for legacy.

God has shaped you at home for what he wants to do now and in the future in your life.

And he'll do it.

If you're making yourself an offering.

As we close, I'm going to show you one more thing.

Remember how this chapter began?

Instead of condemning his brothers, what did Joseph do?

He wept.

And he said, Don't be afraid.

This was about 1800 years before the time of Christ.

So 1800 years later, about 2,000 years ago, there was another man who looked over a group of people who didn't understand the grace he was offering.

And he wept over Jerusalem.

And if you've been paying attention every week, we've had these little breadcrumbs that reminded us Joseph wasn't a perfect man, but he was pointing to the one who could really bring us redemption.

He was giving us a glimpse of who we need to run to if we want to see our legacies redeemed.

And Joseph has been pointing to that man all along.

A man who was deeply loved by his father.

A man who was a shepherd caring for his father's sheep.

A man who was sent by his father to seek the welfare of his brothers.

A man who came into his own, but his own would not receive him.

A man whose brothers did not believe in him.

A man who had every right to demand judgment, but instead extended mercy.

A man whose suffering became the means by which many would be saved.

And here's where the story gets even better.

You see, Joseph's brothers stood before him, guilty and afraid.

And Joseph said, Do not be afraid.

But when we stand before Jesus, guilty of our sins, he offers us something even greater by his blood.

Joseph could offer forgiveness to his brothers for what they'd done to him.

But Jesus went to the cross to pay for what we have done against God.

Joseph could provide bread to keep his brothers alive.

Jesus is the bread of life, and whoever comes to him will never hunger again.

Joseph could give his brothers a home in Egypt, you see.

Jesus has gone to prepare an eternal home for everyone who belongs to him.

Joseph could preserve his family through a famine, but Jesus can save us from the eternal consequences of sin.

Joseph could comfort his brothers in their guilt, but Jesus can take away our guilt.

Joseph could promise to care for their children.

Jesus offers his grace and salvation to every generation of those who will trust him.

Joseph could save his brothers from death for a season.

Jesus conquered death forever.

That's the one we run to.

I don't know about you, but if there's somebody in this room who hasn't trusted Jesus, when we close this time, I hope you'll run to the altar and say, How can I go another day without following that one who did everything, who paid it all, who wiped the slate clean for whoever would call on him.

Do you know you can be sure of that before you leave this place today?

If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, King, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you shall be saved.

That's what the scripture says.

That's the promise.

I pray that there's somebody here today who would move from death to life spiritually because of what Christ has done.

And for all of us, when you look at your own life, when you take that hard and sometimes painful look to the best and say, Man, I just hate this part, hate that part, don't like that.

What would happen today if you brought all that mess and you brought it to the altar and said, No, God, I'm not gonna waste my pain.

You shaped me, Lord.

In part, you took those processes, all that pain, and you made me who I am today.

You prepared me for the mission you've given me, and God, I don't want to just live according to today.

Lord, I want to leave a legacy by the power of the gospel.

Would you bow with me, church?

We're gonna close in just a moment.

Before we do, it sure is nice.

Take just a moment in the quiet to allow the Spirit of God to speak to you specifically.

I'm aware over the last six weeks I've talked to some of you that as I've talked to men, it's brought up some pain that some of you experienced at the hand of men through the years.

I want you to know that there's healing for you.

That God can redeem your story.

I pray that you'd invite him to do that as hard as it is.

I also know that some of you are praying passionately, fervently for men that God's put in your life.

That the Lord would change their hearts, that God would redeem their past.

And I wonder whether somebody came today and you need Jesus.

Would you trust him?

Men of God! You get to determine nobody else does, what your legacy will be.

Are you willing to set aside entitlement?

Are you willing to allow God to repurpose your pain?

Are you willing to think generationally?

So, Father, we invite you to speak to our hearts now.

Move us to a place of decision.

Maybe not for most of us, these grand changes in our lives, but habits that start today and tomorrow, that begin to reshape the future that we leave.

We ask these things in Christ's name.

Amen.

Hey, Pastor Ryan Rush here, and I just want to thank you for being with us at Kingsham Online today.

What an honor.

But I'll tell you what would be even better.

We'd love to see you get connected with the physical church in the days ahead if you haven't already.

And that means maybe if you're local in the West Houston area, we'd love to see you at Kingsland.

Otherwise, regardless, we'd love to help you facilitate uh jumping into a local church near you, and we can do that together.

You can go to Kings and Lun 4, slash online Connecticut.

Kings the number slash online connected to find out the next episode of your journey.

Listen, thanks again for being with us today at Kings and the Lord.