Oct 18, 2026 - Be First - Week 1 - Honor

Right, and just to give you a little insight on how younger Jason thought, if m if my teacher was bringing a new student to the class, if young Billy was coming to the class, my first thought was not, oh how a new friend.

No, my first thought was I can take it.

That wasn't my first thought, right?

Unfortunately, when a new kid came to class, or when a new kid came to school, it wasn't, alright, a new friend, it was, did I just move down in the pecking order?

I'm not number one anymore.

Who's number one, right?

And so the thought process, when we are so competitive and we're hyper-chasing, being first, relationships become competition, and it can affect every relationship we have.

Welcome in everyone.

My name is Jason, and I'm one of the pastors at the Christian Church.

On behalf of our team, I just wanted to say thanks for taking some time to journey with us through the scripture.

Our hope is that these words would cause you to think carefully about this Jesus we proclaim, and that you would choose to trust him in your day-to-day.

As always, if you're in the Asheville area, whether you live here or you're visiting, we'd love for you to come join us at the corner of Livingston and Depot Street in person at the Dr.

Wesley Grant Senior Southside Center.

Our prayer is that God's words would equip you for every good work that He's prepared for you to do today.

But as we start this new series, the idea of honoring, it has everything to do with the coming kingdom.

The way we are to treat each other, the way we engage with each other, the way we interact with each other, the kingdom being on its way really does matter and emphasize where we go as the church.

And so it's it's funny to me that Silas and Royal are here.

When I first started here at the Grant Center with our after school program, anytime, anytime we lined up in the classroom before we went to the gym, you have to get all the kids in line, and every kid demands to be what?

The line leader, right?

Every kid is like, I'm going to be the line leader.

And so to have to tell 18 kids, you can't all be the line leader.

Like I'm literally having to break up fights because kids are demanding to be the line leader.

That thing in us to be first is huge.

We love that concept.

I want to be the one who's in charge.

I want to be first.

I don't care if we're just going to the bathroom.

It does not matter.

I want to be first.

Ricky Bobby said it really famously, right?

If you ain't first, you're what?

Last.

There's no in between.

And but that's the way it's so, I think it's funny in kids because we see adults.

Like they're carefree and they don't care who knows that they want to be first.

We hide it, right?

We're passive aggressive.

We we make sure we kind of let people know.

We drop hints that we're first or we're number one.

And so we do things that kind of set ourselves up a little like the children do.

But think of all the energy you have spent in your life trying to be first.

Think of all the effort you have put into trying to make people think you're number one.

You're the best.

You're first.

It's exhausting, isn't it?

Like it is exhausting to have this thought that I have to let people know that I'm number one, that I matter.

And what happens in that is relationships, all of them, could be marriages, could be friendships, could be work relationships, sports teams, coaches, players, whatever.

Relationships become competitions.

Right?

And just to give you a little insight on how younger Jason thought, if if my teacher was bringing a new student to the class, if young Billy was coming to the class, my first thought was not, oh, how, ah, a new friend.

No, my first thought was, I can take him.

That was my first thought, right?

Unfortunately, when a new kid came to class or when a new kid came to school, it wasn't, all right, a new friend.

It was, did I just move down in the pecking order?

I'm not number one anymore.

Who's number one, right?

And so the thought process, when we are so competitive or we're hyper chasing being first, relationships become competitions, and it can affect every relationship we have.

But what if there is a different way to be first?

And I think that's what the scripture invites us to a different way.

Romans chapter 12, starting in verse 9, and Miss Payton already read it, but it's so rich.

Romans 12 · chapter mention

Says these things do not just pretend to love others.

Really love them, hate what is wrong, hold tightly to what is good, love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.

Notice what Paul did here.

If you're wanting to be first, be first in honoring each other.

If you want to get into a foot race, get in a foot race to honor one another.

So it's not saying, I'll cut it out, stop it, stop caring about all of that, all the people and all the things.

No, he's actually going, you know what?

Here's what changes when the gospel shows up.

You rush to giving honor, not getting it.

Think of all the energy you spend trying to get honor.

What if you spent the same energy trying to give honor?

How would this community look different?

How would your friendships look different?

How would your sports teams look different?

How would your workplaces look different?

How do how would the church look differently if we were in a foot race to honor one another?

Paul, three different times in that passage goes to war against our fakeness, right?

If you want to really love each other, don't pretend to love each other, have genuine affection.

Three different times in two verses, Paul's like, this cannot be fake.

Being fake, unfortunately, how many times have you talked to somebody who's like, well, I don't go to church because they were what?

And they're fake, right?

Church people, so fake, right?

And honestly, we've earned that reputation because we haven't allowed the gospel to penetrate our hearts.

We're so behavior-minded, we're like, as long as people think I love them, everything will be good.

Paul says right here, don't just pretend to love others.

We are pretenders.

But Paul wouldn't say this if there wasn't a way forward for us to do these things.

To give honor is both an internal and an external thing.

It is a respect shown.

And if you look up definitions of the word honor, you can see it, and it's the definitions say showing respect to a high-ranking official.

And I was like, well, that doesn't sound like Paul's definition.

That can't be what Paul means because we're not all high-ranking officials.

Well, when you look up Paul's wording, it the Greek word actually backs that up.

It's giving honor to a high-ranking official, and he's talking about the church because of the character that she is belonging to God, which is one of the most fundamental truths of the Christian walk.

Number one, you have worth because you are made in the image of God.

You are a high-ranking official.

It's weird to start thinking of it that way, but the reality is Paul is saying, you are worthy of respect because you were made in the image of God.

Every single human being on the earth is worthy of respect and it being demonstrated to them because they are made in the image of God.

But church, there's a second thing to this: you're not just made in his image, you're not just his creation.

In Christ, you are his family, sons, daughters, worthy of respect and it to be demonstrated.

And beyond that, verse 6 of Romans 12, he says, In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well.

You bring to the table something no one else can in this church.

The way you are wired, the way you are gifted, the way you speak, the way you do things, you and you alone bring that to this table.

And it's needed.

So you talk about a high-ranking official being worthy of respect.

That's all of us.

It's such a strange thought because we're like, well, I'm nobody, not according to the scripture.

You have a great value that you bring, not because of anything you've said or done, but because of who God has made you.

That's where we begin to go, well, maybe I need to change the way I see what honor looks like.

And I know talking about it like this makes it sound, oh, well, that's just pie in the sky.

Nobody's gonna do that.

Jason, do you know what it's like out there?

I absolutely do.

Why don't we feel this urge or this drive to honor others above ourselves?

Well, in ancient honor culture, literally, Paul would be sitting in a city where there would be competitions.

Winner gets honor.

Like, lit like we you could just walk outside and there's two dudes fighting, wrestling, because it was an honor match, right?

Guys demanding to be shown honor.

Roman soldiers refused to show honor to anyone but Caesar.

Like honor was a big deal.

Like feeling like you had to get it.

It was all that you could collect.

Competitions built on honor alone.

Yeah, you might get a little crown, but the honor was what everybody wanted.

Paul's day, no different than ours.

In 2016, the internet was blessed with a meme.

In 2016, there was a radio interview of a rapper who was being who felt like he was being disrespected on air.

And he used the phrase that is still on memes today.

Uh lyrics get used, athletes say it, but he looked at this radio DJ and was like, y'all need to put some respect on my name.

That's a huge indicator of where we are as a world.

That's a guy sitting there going, You clearly don't see how how valuable I am.

I need you to see it.

Athletes use that phrase, uh, artists are using that phrase, but it has communicated, I want to be the line leader.

I need you to see that I have value, I have worth, and I'm fighting for it because we fear insignificance.

Like, honestly, that's part of the reason we do what we do.

We're afraid we won't matter or we don't matter.

And the problem is nobody has come alongside us and told us that we do matter.

The church is to be a place where that's cultivated.

When we are withholding honor, we end up dishonoring people.

We disrespect people, we demean people, we withhold honor, right?

We're in a season, political season, where we're supposed to hate each other right now.

Like the con the constant mail that's coming into my inbox, it's non-stop.

This person is terrible, this person is great, this person is awful, this person is great.

We are in a season where we are supposed to hate each other.

We are supposed to be building cases against one another.

And the church buys it, hook, line, and sinker, all the time.

That is not what Paul has invited us into.

Why don't we give honor?

We we act as if there's not enough honor to go around.

If I withhold honor from them, well, you know, nobody's honoring me, right?

We have that process, we have that thought.

It's like if I go, if they if I go first, that's unfair.

They have to go first.

They should have to honor me, they should have to say something nice about me.

They should recognize my worth, my value, me first, me first, right?

Paul switched the competition and said, race them to show honor first.

It's very different.

So what it would what what what if we didn't have to wait for everybody else to show us honor before we showed honor?

And the biblical case is we don't have to wait.

The very simple reason for that is because God went first.

Everything a believer gets to live out is a result of God going first.

First John chapter 4.

1 John 4 · chapter mention

This is real love.

Not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.

Aren't you glad God didn't go, well, if you guys get your crap together, I'll come down there and love you.

He didn't.

Aren't you so glad that he wasn't like if you guys will just stop messing around, like start treating each other nicely, start listening to me, start acting like you should.

Aren't you so glad he didn't?

We'd still be waiting, folks.

The beauty is so much of the promises that you read in the in the book of Ephesians is God going first.

So what if people around us aren't going first?

We will not let people's actions keep us from obeying scripture.

And that's what we do.

We put it on other people.

We're like, well, if they'll do something first, then I'll do something.

No, God has done everything.

We have the motivation to move, to act, to show honor.

Romans 5, and this hope will not lead to disappointment, for we know how dearly God loves us because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.

When we were utterly helpless, Christ came at just the right time and died for us sinners.

God went first.

This is why you and I can honor first, even when it feels uncomfortable.

How do we honor the impossibility of honoring others over ourselves?

It seems so different.

The how is we have his spirit.

We have his spirit filling us with his love.

And when you are filled with his love, it pushes out Jason's ability to go, I can take him, changes my thoughts from I can take them to they matter.

The transformation begins when we understand we have his spirit.

The world competes, the church cooperates.

We work together in doing what the scripture says.

Romans 12, 1, very popular verse.

Verse 12, or starting in verse 1, it says, and so I would encourage you.

Romans 1 through 11 is an incredible mind changer about who you are, who God is, what he's done.

Romans 1 through 11, powerful, packed, just phrase after phrase, idea after idea, confronting every bit about who we are and what we think about God.

And so he gets to verse uh one in chapter 12 and says, Therefore, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he's done for you, right?

All he's done.

God went first.

Let them be a living and holy sacrifice, the kind he will find acceptable.

This is truly the way to worship him.

Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world.

What is this custom?

What is the customs and the behaviors of the world?

I get the honor.

Honor me, honor me, honor me, honor me.

We are not to be copying the customs of this world.

But let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think.

Then you'll learn to know God's will for you, which is good, pleasing, and perfect.

Paul gives us the secret sauce, if you will, to how to win the race of honoring others.

And it involves you knowing that it comes from surrender.

Surrendering your ideas of self-promotion and self-celebration and being the center of the universe to going, God, I can't live that way anymore because I've seen what Jesus gave up for me.

Help me to surrender to want to honor people the way you're saying we can.

It starts with surrender and putting your life on the altar and saying, God, you know how much I love to glory hog.

I need you to change my mind about that.

I need you to help me see why honoring others is what you'd have us do.

So, what would it look like?

Simply put, honoring is to recognize worth and to demonstrate it.

As Miss Peyton said, it's not just thinking someone is honorable.

It's not just the thought that counts, folks, right?

Everybody loves to say, well, it's the thought that counts.

No, it's not.

If you thought about buying me a$50 gift card, but you didn't do it, and you told me I thought about getting you a gift card, I'm gonna be angry.

It is not the thought that counts.

It is the demonstration of that thought that counts, right?

We can all think something that we're gonna do and not do it.

How is that good?

I mean, I'm sure there's lots of conversations to be had about that, but you recognize their worth and you demonstrate it.

So when I was a junior in high school, I had just started really beginning to follow Jesus, understanding what it means to follow him.

And my youth pastor took me to lunch.

He sat me down and he was like, So how's life, all this stuff?

And he goes, Hey, I asked you to come to eat with me because I would like for you to lead a sixth grade Bible study.

I was like, like, lead sixth graders Bible study?

I don't even know much about the Bible.

I'm not that great at it.

He's like, Can you read?

I was like, Yes.

He's like, then you can lead these sixth graders in a Bible study.

Just read the book.

Little did I know that sixth graders love to be duct taped to doors.

They asked the greatest questions, right?

It began this journey, but it started with my youth pastor acknowledging, recognizing, and then activating me into a spot that he said, I think you can do this.

And here I am, 31 years later, doing something I'm like, I shouldn't be here.

How many of us have had that person in our life who has recognized that worth and demonstrated it?

How many of you have story after story of someone seeing something in you and going, hey, I recognize this in you.

And I want to activate that, and I want to see you step into that.

I want to see you become all that God wants you to be.

And I'm gonna give you opportunities to lead in that.

I'm gonna give you opportunities to do those things.

And I just wanted to send you a text and say, hey, I'm recognizing what God is up to in your life, and I can't wait to see what He does what He does.

But we withhold that.

Why?

Because nobody's done it for us, right?

Some of you in this room, you don't have that story.

Maybe no one ever pulled you aside and said, I see this in you.

And I just want you to know that just because you haven't had it happen, it doesn't mean you are insignificant.

You are significant, and the church has to get better at this.

The church has failed at doing this for so long because we're glory hungry.

We're afraid to give honor away because we're like, oh, I just want it so much for myself.

We're afraid to give it away because we think there's not enough honor to go around.

We have the God of the universe backing us up.

Like the cross lets us know exactly how valuable we are to our Creator, and He demonstrated it.

We have that visual to mark our lives.

So, my question for those of you sitting in this room the reason we have to talk about honor is because I don't want to see another community get formed where people have to wonder if they matter or not.

How many churches have had people sitting in their seats for years, walking around with people that they've known, just wondering if they matter?

Because no one has ever raced to say, I see this in you.

This matters.

This is an important part of the conversation.

This is not just some insignificant biblical little word that we're meant to just kind of like go over.

That's a nicety.

It changes lives, it changes courses of history, it changes who you believe you are and allows you to come into alignment with who God says you are.

None of the scripture is insignificant, and sort of be first in honoring each other.

So who are you waiting for first before you honor?

And what if you went first?

What if you went first to honor?

Now I don't I want to make sure, and some things go unspoken, and people are like, but what about I just want to say.

Say honoring somebody doesn't mean that you ignore abuse or abandon boundaries or pretend trust when it's not really there.

I need you to hear me say that it's it's possible to show someone dignity without um you know staying in uh harmful relationships and all the different stuff.

I I want to acknowledge that.

I don't want to say this is a fake kind of, oh, I trust this person.

I don't trust this person, right?

That's okay.

And if there are deeper conversations that need to be had about safety and being in relationships that are very toxic to your well-being, then yes, you have to have all those conversations.

But for us in this in this room, in those ordinary relationships that just kind of don't get shown honor, why are we holding back?

In ordinary relationships, there are so many ways to go first.

Send the stinking text, write the note, make the phone call, right?

Give them credit, invite them to lead, thank them for what they do, celebrate them.

There are so many ways to show honor, to demonstrate that the people around you matter.

I remember I'd never forget it.

There was a student, I just really felt like, and I mean I got up ready to do the sermon that I was gonna do for the students.

I was when I was in student ministry, and I really felt like the Lord was like, honor so and so.

And honestly, I just said out loud, I was just like, hey, I just want to, I just want you to stand up.

And I had him stand up and I was like, I just want to tell you, man, I can see the Lord shifting things in your life.

I can see that the Lord is growing you.

I can see your hunger for the scripture, I can see your willingness to serve people and help people.

I just want to say thank you for doing that.

The craziest part about it was after that student ministry, like our worship was done, everything was over, he comes up to me afterwards and he goes, I have been praying that someone would recognize what God is doing in my life because I just don't know if He is.

He's like, I don't even know if God's doing anything in my life.

I'm not even sure.

And so I have been asking the Lord this week that God would let me know that I'm growing.

And to have that done, like I it was crazy because I was like, I'm not sure why I'm doing this, but hey, here we go.

Honor.

It answered his prayers.

That's how serious honor is, and the church being obedient to do it.

And as the band comes, can we close our time together?

How much energy have you spent trying to be first in honor?

And what would it look like for you to surrender that today and say, Lord, I want to I want to obey the scripture and I want to be in a foot race to honoring others.

Who can you race to honor?

And honestly, if you're afraid to practice this out in the world, that's what the church is for.

We get to practice these things together.

Like you may walk up to somebody after church and go, hey, I just wanted to say thanks for being awesome.

They're like, Well, the pastor told you to do that, that's why you're doing it.

Well, yes, I need to practice, right?

Or you can go, no, that actually the scripture tells me to do it, so I'm obeying scripture.

That's a that's a bigger, you know, there you go, right there.

But like, who would you race to?

I had this thought in my brain where it was like I could see everybody looking around in the room, and then two people would lock eyes because they were both wanting to honor the same person, and then people were jumping over seats to try and get to the person before it's like a foot race, a literal foot race to honor people, to celebrate them, to encourage them, to invite them to be who God's made them to be.

What if Highland was a place where people weren't fighting to be noticed because they knew that this community was actively looking for ways to honor people?

And it doesn't have to be giant celebrations, the embarrassing t-shirts and necklace garb and things that that I was so surprised by, but I didn't ask for that, folks.

Just if you're new, that's not how I roll.

I get embarrassed easily, and they knew that about that.

So, but it was an amazing opportunity for our people to go, thank you.

And I'll never forget it.

The shirts make it impossible to.

But in the very same way, that's what we're invited to do for each other.

It is not about just honoring somebody because they're in this position.

But guys, the scripture makes it clear.

Made in the image of God, family of God, unique gifts that must contribute to the church.

You're worthy of being celebrated and it being demonstrated.

What if the church got really good at this?

And I want to lift that burden.

You don't honor people to get God to love you.

You're not obeying because you're like, well, if I do these things, God will take care of me.

No, he's already taking care of us.

He loved us first.

That's what the scripture teaches.

He filled us with his spirit first.

That's what the scripture teaches.

God saw value in us and moved towards us before we did anything.

You have every reason to win the foot race of honoring others.

What could happen in your relationships if you stopped waiting for people to go first and you showed honor first?

I don't know.

Maybe this week you pray and say, Lord, bring to mind one person that you want me to show honor to, to demonstrate to them that they have worth, that they have value.

This communion table is an incredible place to practice honor.

I really don't think we understand just how shocking the communion table was in the early church.

The people who shared the table for communion would never have sat together anywhere else.

Male, female, Jewish, Greek, barbarian, civilized, free, slave, everyone sat at the same table around the body of Christ, the blood of Christ.

You talk about being shown dignity, value, worth, honor.

There is no greater table than the communion table for that.

And it's part of the reason as a church that we don't just take the bread and dip it in the cup, and you know, we just kind of walk away from the table.

Part of the reason we turn and offer it to the person behind us is because it is an invitation to know you mattered this much to our Savior.

You you are a you are a person that God sent his son into the world to live a sinless life for, to die on the cross, to raise from the dead, to reign in heaven and to return.

You are a part of that.

So, whatever the world is saying to you, this table is an opportunity to go, you know what, I'm done trying to be first.

It's exhausting.

But to know that God thought of me, He moved towards me first.

That's what this meal is about.

And it's a shocking reality when you start to understand just how much dignity and value this table communicated in the history of the church.

And it's why we do it every week.

Take that body of Christ given for you, dip it in the cup, the blood of Christ poured out for the forgiveness of your sin, my sin.

And when you take it in, you are proclaiming the death of Christ until he returns.

This meal is for those of you who would say, God, thank you for going first.

We just wanted to say thank you for listening to the Highland Christian Church podcast today.

And if you ever want to connect with us, send a prayer request, ask questions, or for any other reason, you can visit our website, www.highlychristian.com, or you can send us an email at info at highlychristian.com.

Bless you guys.