Loveology – Single and Ready to Mingle

This podcast is presented to you by Pastor Jason Burns and Access Church in Lakeland, Florida.

For more information, visit Access.tv.

It's gonna be a great day.

We're gonna jump into God's Word, and I want to talk to you uh today about uh singleness and dating.

I I titled today's message simply single and ready to mingle.

And there's more single people uh than ever in the church world.

Um in my context and setting, we we uh pastor in Tampa, and Tampa's just packed full of single people.

And um I see it because I see it in the church service.

I saw it in this service earlier, where people in worship and you're kind of worshiping, but you're also waiting for that person to raise their hand to see if there's a ring on the finger.

Come on, somebody, you know what I'm talking about?

And you're just looking, you're like, if there's no ring, it's fair game.

To God be the glory.

And and and it's kind of gotten weird even in the culture today because people are staying single for longer than ever.

The average age of getting married for the first time has risen from 25, which was 10 years ago, to now it's over 30.

It's about 32 years old.

So people are staying single longer, and and they really are finding this kind of identity crisis.

And the church, especially Axis Church, has done an unbelievable job at equipping strong marriages, strong relationships.

I love your pastors and how they teach on this.

Um, I've had Pastor Jason come in and teach my church on marriage and relationships.

He's so good at that.

And then I've found in the church globally that many times, and that might not be the case here at Access, but many times we really focus on relationships and marriage, but we miss out on what singleness is all about.

And I want to talk about that today.

And maybe you're not single, and you would lean in today's message because there's a friend, there's a child, there's a grandchild that needs this message.

But I do know there's a lot of people that are in seasons of life.

Maybe you're in your 20s and 30s and you want to get married one day.

You want to figure out kind of how to make that happen.

Many people might be like, my mom, my mom was at 32 years of marriage, went, and the marriage ended tragically.

And as it ended, she found herself now in her late 50s, single again, and trying to figure out how to find purpose in that singleness.

And so I want to show a verse to you in the book of Proverbs that has kind of been a guide when it comes to this topic for my life and for your life, and I'll kind of give you the idea of why I feel like I have something to present to you today about it.

The Bible says there is a way that appears to be right.

It's kind of what everybody's doing, it's the cultural norm, but in the end, after it's all said and done, it leads to what?

Come on, you gotta help me in all of our locations.

It leads to what?

It leads to death.

And that's what we've seen when it comes to culture today.

There's a way, there's a way of what you should be doing, even in your single years and dating, even in marriage, that appears to be right, but if you follow culture's perspective of it, the ending is always what?

It always is in death.

So let me give you a little bit of my story to just kind of open this up.

This is my wife and uh kids.

That's the Burke family right there.

Got five kids, not really because I love kids, but love my wife.

Come on, to God be the glory.

Um, I my oldest is with me today, traveling with me.

I love it so much.

But um, our picture, this looks this is like the Instagram perfect version of life.

And we got uh 15 years of marriage and five crazy awesome kids, and I love the dog most of all out of all of them.

And that dog will post for any photo ever.

It's crazy.

But the reality is, is to get to this picture in life, we went through a lot of trials and a lot of heartbreak.

Let me just tell you kind of the inside uh background is my wife and I met here in Lakeland at Southeastern, and uh we dated my senior year, her junior year, and about six months in to dating, I became a full-time missionary overseas and in the country of Sri Lanka.

So six months we dated uh in person, and then six months it was long distance.

I came home in December to celebrate, which is both of our birthdays and then our Christmas and then our one-year anniversary, always in one month.

But I was so dissatisfied, so focused on so many random things, and honestly, I was really selfish.

And I came home, and as she's expecting me to propose, I break up with her because I'm a jerk.

I'm a total jerk.

And and and she said, like, why did you wait till right now?

I was like, Well, I wanted to break up now.

This is true story.

I said, I wanted to break up now because then I didn't want to have to buy birthday and Christmas presents, and then one year anniversary presents, and you're guys, I'm good at stewardship.

So I wanted to make sure I save some money.

It's a total jerk.

That led us into five years of both of us being completely single, really trying to figure out identity and who God has called us to be until he led us back together five years later.

So I wanna I want to talk to you about how to make the most of your of your single years.

And honestly, we've not been developed well to do this because honestly, our discipleship has mostly come from Disney.

And Disney has not done a good job at training you about how to biblically deal with singleness and dating.

You gotta think of some of the dating stories in Disney, like Ariel.

Ariel and the Little Mermaid, she's 16 years old.

Did anybody just like say, okay, it's not the right age?

She runs away from her dad, she finds this guy, and she's not gonna work on communication with the guy.

She's just gonna kind of give him, like, you know, the look so that she'll he'll kiss her.

Like this is the most inappropriate relationship ever.

You got Belle from Beauty and the Beast.

Have you thought about this story?

This guy kidnaps her dad, imprisons her father, and then takes her and imprisons her, and yet she falls in love with him.

Do we have to mention, by the way, that he's an animal?

She missed all the signs, all the red flags, and yet she went for it.

Uh, you got Aladdin.

You look at Aladdin and Jasmine, you're like, oh, look at the beautiful love story.

Aladdin is a con artist, ladies and gentlemen.

He, the whole relationship is founded on lies and dishonesty.

He's a criminal and he manipulates his way into her life.

Then you think about some of the old stories of Prince Charming.

You look at Prince Charming.

Have you looked at the story?

He Prince Charming is the most self-absorbed.

He never paid attention to her.

You gotta think on their date, he never asked one personal question, including her name.

This story is flawed.

He he really was not interested in her.

And by the way, just thinking about the story, and I know it's 2025 and shouldn't say this, but if the dude is that interested in shoes, you probably shouldn't date him.

Come on, somebody.

And that's a fact right there.

So, how do we do singleness and dating God's way?

Give me give you three biblical truths today about singleness and dating, but they're in your notes.

I know you're note takers.

I think this will help you.

Number one, singleness isn't a sickness.

If you're single today, I want you to stop looking at singleness as a sickness.

What we've done in our society is made people that are single, and we we we say things like, like, when are you when are you gonna find that person?

When are you gonna get into that season?

When like, what's wrong with you?

We've almost made them second-class citizens.

And I want you to stop looking at this because this is not biblical.

It is not biblical that, first of all, everybody should get married, and it's not biblical that you are incomplete without that person in your life.

So you can own your single season and recognize that God has a significant purpose in your single season.

We see it throughout the Bible as Paul is talking about relationships.

So if you have your Bibles, why don't you turn there?

1 Corinthians chapter 7.

1 Corinthians 7 · chapter mention

We're gonna pick up in verse 7, and he's talking about marriage and relationships and singleness.

And as he's talking about marriage in the first part of this, he says this statement.

He says, I wish all of you were as I am.

Now, what was he?

Paul was a single male, never got married.

He says, But each of you has your own gift from God, and and marriage is a gift from God, relationships are a gift from God.

We need those things in our lives, but one has this gift, talking about the gift of singleness, and he says, and another has that, talking about the gift of marriage.

Marriage and singleness are a gift from the Lord.

One is not better than the other, one is not more significant than the other.

You've got to learn how to own your time of singleness to make the most out of the gift that you've been given.

In the same way you're called to own the marriage that God's given you and make the most of it for the glory of God, as Pastor Jason talked about a couple weeks ago.

It's the same in every area of your life.

So let's go on to talk about what he said about singleness.

He says, I would love for you to be free from concern.

This is what the benefits of singleness are.

An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord's affairs.

He's like, Listen, when you're unmarried, you have one concern in your life: it's the Lord's affairs, and how he can please the Lord.

Then he goes on to say in the next verse, he says, But a married man is concerned about the affairs of the world.

How he can please his wife, and all the men know that's a full-time job right there.

And his interests are divided.

His interests are divided.

What is he saying in there?

He goes, When you're married, and you know this, when you get married, you know it you desire to please the Lord, but you got a lot of responsibilities in your life.

And he's like, There's a dividedness in your in your way of living.

He goes, but an unmarried woman, let's go to the next verse, or virgin, is concerned about the Lord's affairs.

Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit.

But then a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world and how she can please her husband.

Now, why is he saying this?

He says it and he wraps it up in like this last part of the verse.

He says, I'm saying this for your own good.

He's trying to encourage the singles out there, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.

What is the gift of singleness?

Because when you're in it, sometimes you feel frustrated going, I'm missing out.

And I want you to understand this is the big overarching message I want you to get today, is that singleness provides an opportunity for undivided devotion to the Lord.

And if you're looking to figure out what do I do in this single season, understand the primary responsibility is you have an upper hand on all of us married people that you can have full devotion to the Lord in a greater way because you have nothing else distracting you.

This is so contrary to the world's perspective, because the world's perspective is when I get married, then I'll settle down and I'll get connected with church and I'll start serving and I'll make a big deal about my life.

Paul says it's opposite.

It's opposite.

When you're single, you should go all in with God, all in on serving, all in on your purpose, and as you go all in, you're gonna make a massive difference.

And by the way, if you get married along the way, great.

If not, you can still make a difference with your life.

And I know this is contrary to so much of what it's taught in our world today, but I want you to take ownership as single people to say, you know what?

I am not a second-class citizen.

I have undivided devotion to the Lord to make a difference for God's glory, and I'm not gonna wait till I get married to make it happen.

Can I hear a better amen today, church?

Let me let me prove it to you throughout church history.

Um, Amy Carmichael, Amy Carmichael was an American missionary to India.

She began an orphanage, founded a mission, ministered primarily to young girls who are suffering.

She changed the world.

And by the way, she never got married.

She was all single her entire life.

Corey Tin Boon lived 91 years and never married.

91 years.

She was a Dutch Christian who helped Jewish people during World War II, even hid them in the walls of her home.

Eventually, her family was imprisoned in a concentration camp and everyone died except for Corey, who went on to minister to Jewish people and became an author and a speaker, by the way, all while as a single woman.

C.S.

Lewis, he was a British theologian, professor, author of Mere Christianity.

He was a bachelor most of his life.

The only time he got married was later in life, where he had to get in some marriage just to get a UK visa.

So it really wasn't real.

So let's count him as single, okay?

He wrote more than 30 books that have been translated in over 30 languages, sold millions of copies all around the world as a single male.

Let me give you a couple more.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer.

You might have heard of Dietrich Bonhoeffer for his book, Class, The Cost of Discipleship.

He was a German pastor and theologian who was imprisoned at a concentration camp for being involved in an assassination plot against Hitler.

This is a dude's dude.

This is the guy in charge right here.

He was 39 years old when he was tried and hanged for his faith and his zeal for the Lord.

He never married, but he changed the world.

John Stott, John Stott was an Anglican cleric who was single for all of his 90 years.

He wrote extensively on various topics in ministry, including singleness.

He went on to be named Time Magazine's 100 most influential people in the world in 2005.

He was one of the greatest leaders in the evangelical church and brought about a new focus on the authority of Scripture, and he changed the world as a single man.

Lottie Moon, one more.

If you grew up Southern Baptist, you've heard of Charlotte Lottie Moon, who was considered a forerunner in SBC missions.

As a single woman, she spent 40 years of in China on the mission field.

She's credited for laying the foundation for international mission support that SBC churches use to today.

She was fluent in several languages, attended a female seminary, preached the gospel around the world, and she was single.

Why am I telling you all of that?

Do not wait for a relationship status change to walk into the call of God on your life.

When you are single, pursue the Lord, put pursue devotion to the Lord, and watch how He'll use your life.

So I say this to say, lean in here at Access Church.

If you're in this single season, serve like in a significant way.

Make the most of what God wants to do through your life.

So back to my story.

My wife and I, um, before we got married, before we got back together, five years of singleness.

And in that five years of singleness, um, Katie decides that she's no longer gonna pursue some random relationship.

She's gonna pursue the Lord.

She's gonna have undivided devotion to the Lord.

And during that time, she feels God calls her to the mission field.

So she packs up, she's 21 years old, 22 years old, packs up her life.

She has nothing restricting her, and she moves to Ethiopia to work in Mother Teresa homes, where she's backpacking through Ethiopia to do Mother Teresa homes.

And I'm hearing of this story and I'm going, this lady's crazy.

Crazy.

And it's such a remarkable time as someone learned and go, this is not a sickness, this is my time of real significance with my life.

It's the same with your life.

Do not waste your single season waiting for what's next when God has significance for you right now.

Singleness is not a sickness.

Number two, truth about dating and single singleness.

Before you find the one, here's what I want you to focus on.

I want you to focus on becoming the one.

We have this lie that I can't wait to find the person that'll complete me.

We all know the line.

It's you.

Complete me.

And I am missing.

You're the you're the missing part of my life.

That is a recipe for a disaster.

When you have broken, messed up people that come together, guess what?

You're just gonna have a much more group of broken messed upness.

So your job in singleness is not to focus on pursuing the one, but on becoming the one that God has called you to be.

So don't waste this season.

I want to show it to you in Adam and Eve.

Let's go back to the very beginning.

Genesis chapter 2.

Genesis 2 · chapter mention

The Lord God took the man, that's Adam, and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it.

Say, work it.

I like the way you work it.

Come on, somebody.

And take care of it.

I love this.

When you look at the the picture of Adam, before God gave Adam Eve, he gave Adam a job.

Can we talk about this for a second?

If he ain't got a job, he ain't ready.

Like Adam had purpose.

Adam had a job.

I'll just say it this way.

Before you search for your person, make sure you know your purpose.

Because if you don't know your purpose, then what will happen is you'll make that person your purpose.

And then as that person changes, you'll start following that person instead of the purpose that God has for your life.

So Adam has this moment where he's with God and he's given a job by God.

And I love this because before marriage, this is before Eve, before marriage, Adam had three things.

Adam had, first of all, a communion with God.

This is beautiful.

So don't look for that girl and you're going, well, she's saved, kind of, but I can help her to God be the glory.

No, no, no, no.

You want to find someone that's already got that communion with God.

Don't believe the lie.

When I get married, then I'm gonna get serious about God.

No, I'm gonna work on communion with God now.

I'm gonna work on hearing God's voice now.

I'm gonna work on fellowship with God now.

Adam walked with God, had fellowship with God early on before God ever gave him Eve.

The other thing Adam had is Adam had a calling in life.

He wasn't sitting there going, I just can't figure out what I was supposed to do.

He's like, hey, you're gonna name the animals.

That's awesome, God.

That's an elephant hippopotamus right there.

How fun was that?

As he's walking in this calling, he's not sitting there going, Well, God, I can't do this calling until I find someone.

No, he said, I'm gonna own it right now.

And then Adam had discipline and character.

Discipline and character.

By the way, he didn't eat the fruit until she showed up.

Come on, that's someone else's another message.

He had discipline and character.

What is that showing?

He was fully developed into who God wanted him to be, and then after he was fully developed as who God wanted him to be, look at the next verse.

Then it says, and then God says, it's not good for man to be alone.

Notice it does not say it is not good for man to be single.

Because we have confused singleness and aloneness, they're two different things.

Singleness is significant because I honestly think you need a season of being single so you can figure out who you are in God.

You need to figure out who your identity is in Him.

You can find true satisfaction in Him.

Singleness is not bad.

Aloneness is bad.

Aloneness is when you sit there and you're doing life without any community in your life.

And he's like, it's not good for man to be alone.

Adam was fully complete in God, but now I want community around him.

And as he did that, he says, so I'm gonna make a helper suitable for him.

I love this word right here.

Helper.

Like, I'm not gonna have someone that comes along and fixes him.

I'm gonna have someone that comes along to continue what he's already doing and who he already is.

She wasn't the full picture, she was the er in his life.

The her.

The her.

That er matters a lot because I've learned this about relationships.

And I wrote it down this way, and I want you to get it.

Ready?

It's because marriage does not change you, it just magnifies who you already are.

So whatever character flaws and benefits you have before marriage, when God brings him or her along, they become the er that magnifies it in your life.

So let's have a little fun with this.

So, for instance, if you're strong before she comes along, then guess what?

You're gonna be made strong.

Oh.

Rhythmie today, church.

But let's try this.

Even North Lake, let's try this together.

If you are wise before, then guess what?

When he gets in your life, you're going to become wise.

Very good.

If you're healthy before, then you're just going to be healthy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And the problem with this is it works both ways.

Because if you're sad before, when they walk in your life, you think they're going to fix you, but you're only going to be made sad.

Very good.

If you were lazy before, you're just going to get lazy.

Yeah, yeah.

Be careful who you date.

If they're broke before, they're just going to make you broke.

Yeah.

It's just not.

If they're horny before.

No, no, no, we can't say that one.

When I get married, I'm never going to struggle with that again.

That's not how it works.

Hear me out.

All of our locations, I want you to lean in.

Incomplete people have nothing to give in the relationship.

So your job before you get married is to say, God, would you fully develop me into who you've called me to be?

And if I happen to find somebody great, but if I don't find anybody, I'm fully complete because I'm complete in who God's called me to be.

That is how you find the one.

You become the person that you're looking for is looking for.

So you become the one.

Here's your third one.

And then we'll have a little bit of fun with this one before we close it out.

Three biblical truths about singleness and dating.

Singleness isn't a sickness, first of all.

You're not a second-class citizen.

There's significance with it.

And we've seen it all throughout scripture and church history.

That God uses single people, which by the way, including Jesus, changes the world.

Before you find the one, you become the one.

And I love this.

I love having moments like this where you recognize I'm not going to wait for that person to be complete.

I'm going to be complete in Christ.

Number three, the way you deep, the way you date either prepares you for marriage or it practices for divorce.

So let's talk about dating because the dating culture in our world today is absolutely crazy.

It is absolutely crazy.

And so you have this moment where the world teaches us, like, man, what do you do?

Well, you go on an app and then you keep swiping until somebody matches with you.

And then you go and you hang out with that person, and then you you give them as much as they want during that time.

And and this is the dating culture, and it's it's it's a lot of feelings, it's a lot of emotions, it's a lot of craziness in it.

Which, by the way, can I give you a little Bible trivia here?

There's only one place in the Bible where it says this man fell in love with this woman.

Only one place in the Bible.

Out of all the marriages, only one place, this man fell in love with this woman.

Can you guess the story?

Only one.

Samson and Delilah.

Samson and Delilah.

When your motions are involved in this thing, you do not make the wisest choices.

So when you're going into dating, what you have to do is you have to understand if I'm dating, there's got to be a purpose to it.

So what's the purpose to it?

Well, the Bible tells us, let's go back to 1 Corinthians.

It says, if you can't control yourself, you should get married.

So some of you, your first conversations are should be like, I can't control myself.

Can you control yourself?

No, let's get married.

Come on to God be the glory for that.

It needs to be a little bit more to that.

For it's better for them to marry than to burn with passion.

What is he saying in there?

He's like, it's better, like if you're if you understand that that you've got this burning passion, that you know that this relationship is going somewhere, it's better just to get married.

So, how do we do marriage well?

Let me give you a couple of keys on this.

I think they'll help you.

Proverbs 27, 12 says, the prudent see danger and they take refuge.

So what they're gonna do is they're gonna look ahead and they're gonna sit there and go, what danger is in this?

And I'm gonna take refuge, but the simple just go, but I feel so awesome.

They give me butterflies, but they're not saved.

But but they have a history of this and this and this, and but they have all these problems, and isn't it crazy?

We walk in and it's like the Holy Spirit is waving this to you.

Red flag.

Red flag.

But the problem with red flags in relationship is while you're in them, you never see them.

You don't see them, or you ignore them.

And you got people like Solomon, who are the wisest people who ever lived.

Solomon, people traveled from all over the world to hear Solomon's wisdom.

He builds the great temple, he overcomes all these wars, and you know the one thing that took Solomon out?

The relationships.

Some girls came along and he had they had a bunch of red flags, and he ignored them.

And it's the same with your life.

Here's what I want you to lean into this idea because I don't want you to date someone based on potential.

This is our faith problem here because we look at everybody as like, well, God can change them, then wait for the Lord to change them.

Because if you change them, they're changing for you instead of for the Lord.

And truly, you're not dating them based on potential, you're dating them based on their patterns.

And this is where Bell and Diddy in the Beach should have recognized.

Like, hey, he's like, oh, he's so nice.

Look how we can dance in the library together.

He imprisoned you, he almost killed your father.

Red flag.

This guy's toxic.

But but here's what we do with red flags, and I I think it's crazy because what we end up doing with red flags in these relationships is we go, I know they've got a problem, so let's go into a lifelong covenant of marriage to fix it.

I know, I know it's a mess, and I know he I know he can't over get over this addiction, or no, she can't overcome this thing.

So I know what to do.

Let's go into a bond of marriage that'll involve children in the future.

I'm sure that'll fix it.

Let me encourage some of you when you're dating, look at the patterns.

And if the patterns are wrong and they're a mess, then give the Holy Spirit some time to fix it in that person before you get into the relationship.

Because dating, and I'll just give you little simple things on dating, ready?

Because dating should serve as preparation for the intended goal of one thing, which is marriage.

So don't go out there and just go, I'm just having fun in the season.

The goal of dating is not fun.

The goal of dating is is this a person God's called me to marry?

I'm always walking in.

You're going, Aaron, that's a lot of pressure.

Great, then be friends with everybody.

But don't give your heart out to ever all these people.

So you're living in such a way that is creating so much trauma that your kids are gonna have to deal with one day.

So when you're dating, here's the thing I I challenge our young people in all the time, and I think that'll help you.

When I'm dating someone, here's what I'm looking for.

I'm looking, first of all, for a future spouse.

So I'm looking, is this a person I can build a life with together?

I'm looking at boundaries and I'm making sure there's boundaries put into place.

Like, well, when why are we doing this?

Because I'm gonna live in such a way that honors the Lord in my relationship.

I always tell our couples that are dating, I'm going, I want you to remember for the rest of your life, you're gonna tell this story to somebody.

Have a story of godliness and faithfulness to the Lord to tell.

You're gonna train your children on dating based off your story.

Don't lie to them.

Have a story of faithfulness to the Lord.

So Katie and I, our boundaries, I'll get back to our story.

It was five years later that uh that I feel like the Lord tells me that we're supposed to get married.

We weren't even talking, like not even the same friend group, the whole deal.

And uh, and so I told her, I said, I want you to pray about it.

And and anyway, I'll get to the end of that in just a second.

But but on the second date, we sat down and made boundaries.

And our boundaries were crazy.

They were, they were, we're gonna have a curfew, we're not gonna be alone in each other's rooms, we're gonna do something.

We're gonna live a life that honors the Lord, it was faithful to the Lord.

You go, well, that sounds extreme.

Well, we feel like the call of God on our life is extreme.

And so we're gonna live in such a way that honors God, have boundaries in your relationships.

You're like, well, everybody's doing this.

There's a way that appears to be right, and the end ends in death.

No wonder the divorce rate is over 50%, even for the church, because we're following a model that doesn't work.

Third thing we're gonna look for is spiritual growth together.

You want to know who God's called you to marry?

Here's what I've realized is you're looking for someone that you're equally yoked.

Equally yoked doesn't mean you're just a part of the same faith.

Well, they sometimes go to church together.

Here's what I realize equally yoke is equally yoke is two animals that are strapped together with this thing called a yoke.

And it didn't that the type of animals and all that kind of stuff and the color of the animals, none of that mattered.

What mattered is the speed of the animals.

So you want to find someone to marry, here's what you do: you run as hard and as fast after Jesus as possible.

And when you run as hard and as fast after Jesus as possible, you look to your left and you look to your right, and you figure out who else is running at this speed, that's the person to marry.

Because we're called to go after God together, and we're gonna make our relationship about what matters most, which is eternity.

We're gonna start growing together.

And don't believe this lie.

Well, we'll read our Bible, we'll pray together when we get married.

No, start even now.

Start even now.

Build the relationship, not on physical, build it on spiritual, and watch how God will build your life.

All right, so let me finish up and I close this out.

I think it'll be it'll help y'all.

So Katie and I um get, I I drive down, I'm in a season of prayer and fasting.

This is after five years after we broke up.

Five years in this singleness, five years Katie's gone to Ethiopia.

I've gone to start nonprofit, I did my MBA.

We both became complete in who God has called us to be.

I was so immature and I had so many issues.

And God did a deep work in me, and God was doing a deep work in her, and I had no clue that God was working in her as he was working in me.

And all we did is we found such satisfaction in who the Lord had called us to be.

And when I found total contentment in the Lord, I remember it's prayer and fasting.

The Lord brought Katie up to my mind.

He's like, You should go and ask that girl out.

So I drove down to Lakeland.

She was living at I We went, we went, we were with a bunch of friends going to see a movie.

We're we're gonna get a movie.

So we're Katie and I were like, Hey, we'll go.

Uh I said, I'm gonna go up to the Blockbuster.

Y'all know anything about no blockbuster.

There was a thing called Blockbuster.

And I remember Kate, I said, Hey, will you ride with me?

Let's go get a movie for all of our friends.

We're gonna watch a movie.

So we're in the car, and I we hadn't talked in years.

And I said, Hey Katie, I said, I just I want you to know I've been praying, I've been a seasoned prayer and fasting.

I feel like God's told me you're supposed to be my wife.

Now, I do not recommend this.

And if a dude does this, most of the time they're crazy, okay?

So I she's like, Well, that's awesome to hear.

I have not heard that at all.

I'll pray and I'll fast.

She went 31 days, she did a prayer and fasting.

And during the prayer and fasting, she wasn't really praying if it's okay to marry me.

She was asking the Lord to remove the total satisfaction that she had in her heart of just being single and fulfilled in Him.

I literally I remember calling her multiple times.

She's like, Aaron, I'm okay.

I just don't even know if I want to pursue marriage because I just know who God's called me to be.

And it was such a switch.

And I realized she'd reached the goal that all of us should reach, which is we are not looking for him or her to find satisfaction.

We have found it in God and God alone.

And as I am fully satisfied in him, if he brings me a spouse, that's great.

But I've got my purpose and I've got my purpose, my my my whole purpose is all in him.

So stop looking for that person and start finding fulfillment in him.

When you find it in him, maybe just maybe, maybe, maybe it's total fulfillment in him that he'll look down and go, Oh, you got it.

Now, maybe I can bring you that spouse, or maybe I'll bring you those children, or maybe I'll bring you that ministry, or maybe I'll bring you that business.

But when those things are your goal, and those have become the God of your life, he wants to be number one.

One verse and then I'm done.

Paul says this statement in here to help our married people, our singles, those who've been divorced, those who are struggling.

He says, nevertheless, you're married, you're single, whatever it is, each of you should live as a believer in whatever situation the Lord has assigned to them.

I don't know your current relationship status.

All I know is be a Christian in the midst of it.

If you're gonna live as a married person, be a person that is like Christ, laying down your life for your spouse.

If you're dating, date as a believer who says, No, I'm gonna have boundaries and pursue purity and honor God.

If you're single, you're not gonna wait for the future to walk in significance.

You're gonna own it because you're gonna live as a believer right now, despite the assignment that God has on your life.

No matter what the assignment is, we're gonna be as Christians.

Can I hear a good amen today, church?

Let me clip pray for you.

I hope the Holy Spirit has spoken to you today.

I hope it's encouraged you.

I want to take a moment and pray for those who are in this place today and you you're struggling.

Maybe you're struggling in marriage, maybe you're struggling in your dating life, maybe you're struggling even in just in the singleness.

I want to pray supernatural strength and wisdom over you.

With every eye closed, you go, Aaron, I'm I'm in a season right now.

My current assignment, my is maybe it's marriage, single, dating.

It's just a struggle right now, all across all of our locations and access.

If that's you, just throw a hand up to heaven all over.

Come on, there's hundreds of hands.

Just wave it up, come and put it all up.

Lord, you see the hands that are raised all over this room.

You see them there in North Lakeland, those online.

Come on, with that hand that's raised, just put it right over your heart.

Say, God, guard my heart during this time.

Help me to find that satisfaction in you.

Let me find completion in who you've called me to be.

Let me not waste this season, whether it's in marriage, dating, single.

Let me live as a believer during this time.

Lay my life down to do what you've called me to do.

Let me honor you.

And let me find true fulfillment and satisfaction in you.

Every eye closed, every head bowed.

If you're here today and you don't have that relationship with God, you'll never have complete be complete until you know that that completion does not come from some guy or some girl, but it comes from Jesus.

2000 years ago, when we were lost in our sin, Jesus came.

He lived a perfect life, died a horrific death for our sins, and he rose again three days later, conquering death, hell, and the grave.

And now he gives us the option to put our faith in him, be totally forgiven, given a fresh start.

Maybe you've never received the gospel, maybe you've never been changed by the gospel.

Today's your day today.

Across all of our locations here at Access, God's speaking to your heart.

Maybe a friend invited you because they were getting baptized, but it's your day to give your life to Jesus.

On the count of three, if that's you, I'm just gonna have you throw a hand up and say, Aaron, pray for me.

Today's my day.

I'm giving Jesus my life.

I want to find full completion in him.

One, two, three.

Come on, if that's you, throw that hand up.

Thank you, buddy.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you.

Thank you in the back there.

Thank you at North Lakeland.

Let's all pray this prayer out loud together.

Come on, can we all join me in prayer?

Just say it like this.

Say, dear Jesus.

Come on, let's all say it, dear Jesus.

Today, I give you my life.

Thank you for dying for me.

I choose to live for you for the rest of my life.

Be my Lord and be my savior.

I'm gonna follow you.

In Jesus' name we pray.

Amen.

Amen.

Can we celebrate those who just made the best decision ever?

Love you guys.