Shadows – The Shadow of Shame

This podcast is presented to you by Pastor Jason and Liz Burns in Access Church in Lakeland and Bartow, Florida.

For more information, visit Access.tv.

It's a good day to be in church.

I'm so glad you made it to 1030.

God, this is a packed room.

Y'all showed up to church this morning.

Come on, somebody.

Well, hey, I'm excited to preach this morning, but if we never met, my name is Baron.

I get the honor and privilege to be the youth pastor here.

Yeah.

Hey, so we're like 60 seconds.

Can I just tell you about how Axis Youth is going just for 60 seconds?

Just so you guys get to know it would be bad for me as a youth pastor not to tell you what's happening with our students.

And so I need you to know this.

Across all three locations, we had so many students get baptized last Sunday.

Come on, that's a good place to give God praise.

But also, here's what I love in the month.

This this past month, between all three of our locations, we've had 90 students say yes to following Jesus.

And so, like, that's that is the greatest thing to ever take place.

Here's what you need to know about this next generation is that Bible uh purchases are actually up 41%, and that this generation is actually coming to church more than any other generation.

And so there's really something special happening within this generation, and so I'm just excited I get to be a part of it.

And so God's doing something special within, just over the world, but even in our church.

And so I think, come on, can we give God praise for that?

Come on.

We love it.

Okay, that's it.

60 seconds is over.

Let's jump into the message.

You guys sound good?

Sound good, everybody?

Okay, here's here's what I need you to know.

I don't preach until about 7:30 p.m.

on Wednesday.

And so it's 10:56 in the morning a.m.

I I don't normally preach in the morning.

So I need you guys to be awake, be alive.

If I say something, say that's good, preacher.

You can call me anything but ugly.

But yeah, that's it.

Yeah, you see, we're we're getting it.

And I preach faster when we talk back, so let's try.

And the church said, Yeah, I love it.

Also, if I say tonight, it's because I preach at night.

So if I say tonight, just bear with me.

Don't make fun of me.

Don't judge me.

Sound good?

Let's go.

Let's do it.

Hey, let's pray before we jump in.

Jesus, we love you.

We thank you for this moment that we all get to gather together.

It's not by accident that we're all here for this purpose, for a reason.

So thank you that you're still speaking and that you're that your word is alive and well in this room.

Father, help us lean it, help us to lean into what you have for us in Jesus' name.

Every cross this room we step.

Amen.

I love it.

We've been in a series called Shadows, and so I love this series.

It's been such a good series.

And so here's how we've defined shadows it's the dark parts of our lives that follow us around.

And so Pastor Liz kicked off the series talking about the shadow of pride.

And so I am probably one of the most prideful people in the world.

And so that message smacked me in the face.

And I was like, man, I need to be humble.

And so I can I can admit that about myself because I'm humble enough to say it.

Come on, somebody.

Last week we talked about the shadow of doubt.

And so Pastor Jason talked just a beautiful message on what we should do with doubt?

How do we deal with doubt?

And so I need to tell you up front what we're gonna talk about because it's it's kind of a subject or a topic that if it could it could step on some people's toes and make people feel some type of way.

So I need to tell you up front so that you guys get ready.

You sound good, everybody?

Yeah, I need you guys to make sure you're with me.

Uh this morning I want to talk about the shadow of shame.

I want to talk about shame this morning.

So I want to open up with a question.

Have you ever like had a moment you're like, man, I wish I can go back in time and erase this?

Yeah, yeah.

So I had one of these moments this past May.

Um, I was in a wedding, and so I need you to know this.

I'm gonna set somebody free this morning.

Um, don't be in weddings for people you don't really care about.

It's not worth it.

It's it's a lot of money, it's a lot of time, it's a lot of energy.

Don't do it.

So this person for me, he asked me to be his best man, and this is my best friend, rider dog.

This is my guy.

And so I told him, yeah, like I'm all in.

And so there's people in my people that ask me, I'm like, man, I love you, but like I just can't do it because oops, anyways, we'll move on.

But this is my guy, like this was one of my best friends, and so still my best friend.

And so in May, he got married in Michigan, and so I did the we flew, we did the whole thing, the whole weekend, it was great.

And so something happens, the ceremony takes place, it was beautiful, it was awesome.

They said I do, they got married, we're out to take photos, and so behind me, all I hear is people laughing, and I just couldn't figure it out.

I'm like, oh man, maybe they're just like conversing with each other and just having conversations.

But then it starts getting like louder and louder, and like you know, like like an embarrassment, like someone's like laughing because they're like embarrassed for the person.

It was like one of those laughs, and so I couldn't figure it out, but then this happens.

Yeah, I'm letting go of my shame this morning, y'all.

Here it is.

I'm letting go.

But this this is this is my pants.

I'm the best man in this wedding before the ceremony, before the speeches.

This happens to me right before all of that.

We're taking photos.

We're taking photos, and okay, take it off.

I don't want to look at it anymore.

Take it off.

And so, like, everyone's laughing in the shared album we have.

There's videos of them like recording me, making fun of it.

Like, they're like, I can't not live this down.

Like, if to this day, I will, like, this will forever humble me.

It's it was really bad.

And so it it's it's a funny story, it's a funny thing, but there's there's something here that I want to address.

There was a feeling that took place, that's a human feeling.

A feeling of, man, there's there's shame attached to this, there's embarrassment.

And man, like we all deal with that from time to time.

There's things that happen that we try to cover up, mistakes we make, that we're like, man, I wish I could just go back and erase this.

There's our feeling of shame, and that's where shame lives.

It lives in the places we'd rather hide, we'd rather cover up, and man, I just wish this never happened.

That's where shame lives.

And whether you're a parent in a room, whether you're 60 in the room, whether you're 12 in the room, we all deal with shame.

We all have issues and battles with shame that we we sometimes don't want to address.

So, where does shame come from?

I think shame comes from two places.

I think the first place comes from our mistakes.

It's from the places where we maybe missed a mark and we didn't get it right and we just we just missed it.

It comes from our mistakes.

The second place I think shame comes from is other people's words or actions.

There's somebody that has said something over you or said something about you or done something to you, and we and we carry shame.

We look back and we're like, man, I wish this never happened.

If I can just hide this, if I can just let no one else see this.

I wish I can go back and see, let no one see my pants being ripped.

Like I wish no one saw that.

But that's what shame does.

It keeps us hidden, it keeps us isolated.

It's a feeling that it's really hard to shake if we're honest.

So I want to give you some hope up front, and then we're gonna dive into shame.

Paul says this in Romans 8.28, says that, and we know that God causes everything.

Somebody say everything.

Someone say everything.

Works everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to the purpose for them.

Can I give you some hope this morning?

If you're taking notes, you can write this down.

That God can step into the places we'd rather forget.

That God can step into the places we'd rather forget.

Notice how I said can because it's up to us to actually let them into those places.

See, what shame does is shame likes to keep you hidden.

Shame likes to keep you, man.

If you tell somebody this, man, they will never look at you the same.

Man, they man, if they knew what you've done, man, it would be over for you.

But God can step into the places you'd rather forget, but we have to invite them into those places.

And so it's it's a challenging, it might be hard, but God can step in.

God can do what God does best if we invite them in.

So here's what I want to do.

I want to land on just a couple chapters in the Bible.

And so I want to land in Genesis.

I want to talk about Adam and Eve, where shame first took place in the Bible.

So this is the first book of the Bible.

If you have a Bible, literally open up your book, go a couple pages.

There's Genesis, boom, right there.

And so here's what I want to do.

I want to talk about shame from the very beginning of time.

So you need to understand this about shame, that shame was never God's design for us.

That shame was actually something that God never wanted you to carry.

See, in the beginning, God creates the heaven and the earth, he creates everything, all the animals, all the things.

He creates Adam from dust, and then he looks at Adam and says, Hey, you need to help mate.

And so here's where we pick up in Genesis chapter 2, verse 21.

Genesis 2:21

It says to the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep.

And while the man slept, the Lord God took out one of the man's ribs and closed the opening.

Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man.

At last, the man exclaimed, This is the bone of my bone and the flesh of my flesh.

She will be called woman, because she was taken from a man.

This explains why a man this is why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.

And here's where I want to land for a second, just for a few moments.

It goes on to say, Now the man and his wife were both naked, but they felt no shame.

From the very beginning, before sin enters the picture, this is what God wanted for us to have no shame.

From the very beginning, the nakedness in here is physical.

They were both naked, they were husband and wife.

But it also represents that they were completely vulnerable and completely known and fully loved by God.

That God knew everything about them, that they were fully exposed, everything was on the table, and they were fully known and loved completely by God.

And they had no shame in it.

Before sin enters the picture, this was God's design for you and I.

That God would fully know us and that God would fully love us and know every single part about our lives, and we wouldn't have to carry shame.

This was God's design for us, but then something takes place and something happens.

See, God tells them, hey, you have all of this, but don't eat from the one tree.

See, if you're like anything like myself, if someone tells me you can do anything but the one thing, I'm like the one that's like, oh yeah, I want to do it.

And so, like, I think we we kind of give like Adam and Eve like this weird, like, oh man, you shouldn't have done this, but we're like, we do this all the time.

And so here's what happens.

They they God tells them not to do this.

Genesis 3 opens up in verse 1, and the serpent comes, the enemy comes and says, Did God really tell you you shouldn't do that?

Like, oh man, he man, he's lying.

That's essentially what he's trying to say.

And so here's what happens.

They do something that they shouldn't, and then they feel shame immediately.

Can I tell you something about shame this morning?

Shame makes us hide.

Shame makes us hide.

Genesis chapter 3, verse 6 says this.

Genesis 3:6

The woman was convinced.

She saw that the tree was beautiful and the fruit looked delicious, and she wanted the wisdom it would give her.

So she took some of it of the fruit and ate it.

Then she gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate it too.

And at that moment, their eyes were opened, and they suddenly felt shame at their nakedness.

So they sewed fig leaves together to cover themselves.

And when the cool evening breezes were blowing, the man and his wife heard the Lord God walking about in the garden.

So they hid from the Lord God among the trees.

I think this is a representation of what we do from time to time.

We make a mistake, and instead of running to the one that can fix it, we run further and further away.

We run further and further from the one that can actually redeem everything.

Because shame has this way of making you feel like you're not worthy, that you're not enough, that you're too far gone, that you are broken.

And from the beginning of time, shame was never designed for you to carry.

And God wants to fully know us and fully understand us.

And so what do we do?

We hide just like them.

They grab leaves, a temporary thing that could fix nothing.

And so we do this, we do this as well.

Shame still has this way of doing that today.

Shame will tell you this.

Shame will tell you you can't let them see that.

Man, you can't, man, you can't, you can't tell anyone about this, what you're dealing with, the issues that you have, the addictions that you're facing.

Man, you can't let them see you like this.

Man, you can't even let God see you like that.

God will never love you if you did that.

God, there's you are too far gone.

You can't let God see you like this.

You can't let people know what you've done.

You can't let people know that.

If they knew this, if they understood this, man, you'd be cut off.

And so what do we do?

We keep it hidden.

They went from walking with God to from to hiding it from God.

They went from fully being known and loved by God to hiding from the one that knows them and loves them.

And they kept it hidden and they ran so far away.

Can I tell you something, church?

That the enemy does his best work with the secret parts of our lives.

That the enemy does the best work when we keep things secret.

Why?

Because if your shame is hidden, that means it's it stays powerful.

If your shame stays hidden, oh man, it has so much power over you.

And the enemy has a foothold into your life, and he can keep on sharing lie after lie after lie and keep you stuck after stuck after stuck, keep you good for two days and mess up and mess up and mess up.

It keeps you in this cycle.

The enemy does his best work when we keep things hidden.

The secret parts of our life, he does his best work with us.

But when you bring your shame into the light, God can do something with it.

God can do something with the things that we keep hidden.

So there's a consequence for Adam and Eve for eating from the tree that they know they weren't supposed to eat from.

And so I love, I love that.

Like God's God's talking to them.

He's like, What are you like, what are you doing?

But this is what uh Genesis chapter uh verse 9 says.

So then the Lord God called to the man, where are you?

And he replied, I heard you were walking in the garden, so I hid.

I was afraid because I was naked.

And so God's kind of telling him, He's like, Man, who first of all, who told you you were naked?

Like he's calling, he's calling things out.

But you see, God, he's like, Where are you?

He's like talking to Adam like God knows everything, like God knows exactly where he's at.

God's giving him an opportunity to come into the light.

He's saying, Hey Adam, what what did you do?

He's giving him an opportunity to come out of hiding.

Can I tell you the first step of healing is honesty?

That if you want to find healing, you have to be honest.

That the first step to healing is honesty.

You have to be honest.

And so Adam, he's talking to God saying, Hey, like, well, he started blaming Eve, which we can get into that.

That's a different topic for a different day.

Men lead, anyways.

Um, oops.

So he says, uh, well, she she did this, and then she goes, Well, I got deceived, and so I did it.

And so, like, but there was there was honesty, kind of.

They were saying, Hey, God, look, yeah, we did do this.

Here's what Psalm chapter 32 says it says, When I refused to confess my sin, my body wasted away.

Psalms 32 · chapter mention

And I groaned all day long, day and night.

Your hand of discipline was heavy on me.

My strength evaporated like water in a summer heat.

Finally, I confessed all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide my guilt.

And I said to myself, I will confess my rebellion to the Lord, and you forgave me.

All my guilt is gone.

If you want to be wanna find healing, you have to be honest.

From the very beginning of time, God wanted to fully know you and fully love you.

And it doesn't change.

God's love doesn't change.

So we see there's a consequence for actions.

God just telling them here's what's gonna happen because of this.

But I love what God does in Genesis chapter 3, verse 21.

Genesis 3:21

It says, and the Lord God made clothing from animal skins for Adam and his wife.

See, this this verse is very, very important.

You probably like we're talking about animal skins.

How is this important?

One, the Lord covered them.

Can I tell you God covers what shame exposes?

That shame, that God will cover your shame.

That God covers you.

Why this verse, can you go back to one for me?

I know it's out of order.

Can you go back to the verse for me?

Here's why this verse is very, very, very, very important.

Because divine forgiveness just took place.

This is the first time in scripture, this is a foreshadow of what Jesus is going to do on the cross.

Sin took place.

They confessed their sins.

God covers them by killing an animal, and blood was shed.

The blood was shed, and this is the divine forgiveness.

This is the first foreshadow of Jesus, what he's gonna do on a cross to die on a cross for you would die.

Here's what Hebrews says in chapter 9.

It says, in fact, according to the law of Moses, nearly everything was purified with blood.

For without the shedding of blood, there is no forgiveness.

Can I tell you something, church?

That the shame we carry, Jesus already paid for.

That the shame we carry, the things that you carry, Jesus already died on a cross for.

Like the the parts of your life where it's it feels broken, like there's no hope, Jesus is already paid for.

And God covers us when we're honest.

And God covers us when we, instead of hiding, we run to Him.

So can I give you some hope this morning?

That God can turn your shame into a testimony.

God can turn your shame into a testimony.

That's good news for somebody in the room this morning.

He doesn't just waste your shame, he actually redeems it.

He doesn't just waste it, God doesn't waste your pain.

God doesn't waste anything.

He actually redeems the story.

And here's how I know it Romans 8.28 says this.

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.

God is in the business of redeeming stories.

That's what he does best.

And that's what God wants to do.

God never wanted you to carry shame.

God never wanted you to deal and have to wrestle with it.

Jesus actually died on a cross for it.

I can show you more in scripture.

You can see all throughout scripture that Moses, he killed a man.

Murderer, and God still used him to lead his people.

Peter denied Jesus three times, and God still used him to build the early church.

Paul persecuted Christians, and he was the one that preached the gospel.

David, murderer, adulteress.

He was the man after God's own heart, and God still used him.

God's in the business of redeeming stories.

God's in the business of turning shame into a story for his glory.

Maybe that the places that you feel like are the most broken, and how could God use this?

Is actually the stepping ground God wants to shine his glory right through.

Yeah.

But we have to allow him to do that.

Like God can step into those places, but we have to be the ones that let him into those things.

And so how do we do it?

I think there's three things that we can do.

The first thing, if you take a notes, write this down.

Stop hiding and start healing.

The areas of your life where you're just hiding that you're running from God.

You're trying to cover yourself up.

We don't sometimes we don't we don't hide like we don't hide easy.

We we hide with filters.

Like we hide through filters, we hide through smiles.

We hide through, I'm good, how are you?

We hide through busyness, we hide through accomplishments, we hide through success.

Like we all we all have things that we hide what's really going on from.

Just like Adam and Eve in the in the garden.

They hid, they covered themselves.

We cover ourselves with filters all the time.

Fake smiles, we smile even though we're going through hell and back if we're honest.

And we're dealing with all these things, and so we just stay busy and busy and busy and busy.

And so it's really easy to go hide and get and just say, I'm just gonna try, I'm gonna put my head down and keep on digging.

But it's time.

Start stop hiding and start healing.

When it heal starts with honesty.

Stop hiding.

Number two is just bring shame into the light.

You gotta bring it into the light.

With the right people, with the right friends, with the right accountability.

You gotta bring it into the light.

You gotta bring the things that you're carrying, the brokenness, the ugliness of your life.

You gotta bring it into the light.

Because the enemy does a secret, he does the best work with the secret parts of our lives.

And you will stay stuck and stuck and stuck and stuck.

Don't bring it to the light.

Let God rewrite the story.

God's in the business of redeeming of redeeming souls, of redeeming stories, of redeeming people.

Why not you?

God really wants to fully know you and fully love you no matter what you've gone through.

God still loves you, and God still wants to have a relationship with you, and He wants to rewrite the story of the broken parts of your life.

I want to close with this with this story, with this illustration.

And I I have this little pot this morning.

I literally threw it up.

Pastor Ryan saw me.

I was in the back and I threw it up in the sky.

It was a pot and I threw it up in the sky and broke it because I needed it to be broken for the illustration.

So my wife will talk about it later.

But it it was a it was a pot that had plants in it.

I told you, sorry, wife, I love you.

Like now it's useless.

Like I can't I can't plant anything with this.

Like it's done.

Just random pieces, like just broken, like useless, whatever.

It's it's done for.

Like it's useless.

There's this there's this thing in the in the Japanese culture of like a type of art that's called Kinsaga.

And so what it is is that they take broken pieces like this, looks just like this, of pottery.

And instead of it being cracked and broken, they fill up those cracks and all the broken pieces and they fill it with gold.

And so here's what it looks like after this beautiful pottery.

This beautiful image.

What once was broken, that had useless no pieces, no hope, no anything.

They turn it and it looks just like this.

A beauty has value, has a use, has a purpose.

But what I love a lot about what they do is that it doesn't diminish the brokenness.

Like you can still see all the cracks, you can still see all of it.

But it's a beautiful pottery.

Can I tell you friends that this morning?

Like that God wants to do that with the shame that we deal with.

That the broken pieces of our life, the places we're like, God, how could you even use this?

God, how can you even redeem this?

That God, the master, takes broken pieces, takes brokenness of our lives, and fills it with his grace, fills it with his love, and rewrites the story.

And like it doesn't mean that you weren't once broken, it doesn't mean that you don't have a past, it doesn't mean that you didn't make mistakes, it doesn't mean that you don't carry shame.

Oh man, you can still see all of the cracks, you can still see where all the brokenness was, but God man, his grace just came into my life and just made it a whole different story.

Like He took, He took what was broken, He took what was useless to some people, but God is in the redeeming business and He took my life and He took the things and part of the chain that I deal with, and He made something beautiful out of it.

He made something beautiful out of the places of my life where I thought it wasn't worth it, that no one would even love me, that no one would even want to have to deal with this.

And not only does he redeem and restore, but he actually can use it as a testimony to people around you.

Oh man, you're dealing with anxiety.

I was like just eight months ago.

Look what God did.

Oh man, I was also dealing with the same thing, and I felt all the shame.

But when man, when I came to God, when I came and brought my things forward and brought it to the light, man, God redeemed it and did something beautiful with it.

That's what the God we serve.

God's in the business of redeeming stories.

And he wants to redeem the broken parts, the places where we feel shame, the places where we feel like, man, I'm too far gone, and he wants to make something beautiful out of it.

That's what he's in the business of doing.

So, what would it look like this morning, church family?

The places where we're dealing with shame, places that we're just dealing with all these hurts.

We just stop hiding and we just rant to follow.

That we brought things to light, and we just let God do what he does best.

I think we would look, we would look a little different, we walk a little lighter, and we can make God's name great by showing, hey, here's what God did for me.

And if I know that God can do it for me, if Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and forever, man, he can do it for you too.

Man, I remember when I was in my worst moments.

I was broken, useless, thought I had no hope.

God met me right where I was at and changed my life forever.

And if I know he can do it for me, in the places where we're where I was hidden, where I was just doing my own thing, where I was isolated and said, Man, I can never bring this to light.

And when I actually ran to the Father, if He can do it for me, I know He can do it for you.

It's time to take off shame and start walking in the freedom that God wants for you.

That God can step into the places we'd rather forget, but we have to let him in.

All across this room, you can bow your heads and close your eyes.

Father, we we just want to stop and pause and say thank you.

Thank you for being in the business of redeeming stories.

That no matter what we're facing, no matter what we're dealing with, that the shame that we carry, whether we're walking through divorce or we're walking through tragedy or we're walking through mistakes or addictions, thank you that you turn stories for your good.

Thank you, that you cause everything to work together.

Would you help us that where shame tries to come creep in, would you help us to run to you?

Would you help us to not hide from you, but we be honest with you.

Be honest with the right accountability around us.

And help us to just let you write the story.

Help us to just let you rewrite the story.

Father, we love you.

All across this room with all your heads still bowed, eyes still closed.

Talking about a message on shame.

And some of you might in the room be like, Man, I don't even know if I have right standing with Jesus.

I don't know if I have a relationship with him.

Can I tell you this morning that you can have that right now in this moment?

So if that's you, no one's looking, all eyes are closed.

I just want you to raise your hand.

If you said, Man, I want to start or restart a relationship with Jesus.

I see that hand.

I see that hand.

Put your hands down.

Here's what I want to do.

All across this room, church family, can we pray together?

No one, no one prays together.

So if you could just repeat after me, say Jesus.

Like you mean it, say Jesus.

Today, I give you my life.

Thank you that you died on the cross and you rose again three days later.

For me, Jesus, today, you are the Lord of my life.

For the rest of my life, I will follow you.

And it's in Jesus' name that I pray.

Amen.

Church family, look up at me.

We just have people for the first time.

I love it.

I love it.