How to Keep the Romance Alive: Song of Solomon 1:1 - 2:7

You're listening to the Bible Guys, a podcast where a

couple of friends talk about the Bible in fun, in

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you're a daily listener.

Yeah, after how poorly we've done this week, we're shocked

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Yes, hopefully we'll up the bar today.

We're going to do We're gonna try this time.

Yes, let's try, actually try, We're gonna try.

Hey, we're gonna start off with a segment that Desiree

is calling story time.

So this is how it reads.

She said, today we are moving out of the Book

of Proverbs, and by the way, we're probably gonna jump

back in.

Right Yeah, yeah, sure, yeah, yeah, so from twenty five

to thirty one, those proverbs were coalated during the rainy

King Hezekiah. Yeah, so that's a little later, but yeah, OK,

so we're gonna pause now and finish up with a

lot of Solomon's other writings. I'm yawning, okay, yeah, sorry

about that. Yeah, I said like five sentences an already

you bore me. I'm boring you did.

That's a movie cool, by the way, yes, you bull me.

It's from Blade Part one. Okay, today we were moving

out of Proverbs and jumping into Song of Solomon. Since

we were talking about the wedding day, let's share funny

or embarrassing stories.

From your early marriage days.

Okay, So the first thing that came to my mind

is actually something that happened on my actual wedding day.

We took photos beforehand, so we did the first look,

you know where they you know, sometimes you don't see

the bride before the wedding, but if you're doing photos

and you know reception right afterwards and all that, you

have to do a first look. So we did bride

and groom first look in this room, and so my

wife and I saw each other, you know, cried, had

our really fun moments. But we were sort of in

this room for like half an hour, and she was

sitting down, I was standing up, and I was like,

you know, standing right next to her. Well, at the time,

I know this sounds really silly, but at the time,

I was taking taekwondo.

We were in college.

Oh no, And I don't think any story begins, any

good story, yes begins. We were in our hucks, in

our wedding dress, and at the time I was taking taekwondo. Yes,

that transition phrase is there's nothing good about that one.

You're really boring me.

Yeah, so I just it's the sound of my voice

is giving me a complex to sleep.

So uh So, anyway, uh, I used to do this

silly thing. It was so bad. And I used to

do this.

Thing where I would like throw a punch and I

would like try to impressively stop within like a half

an inch before your nose. And I would sometimes do

that with a kick, super impressive. Yeah, it's so it's

so bad. It's so bad. I thought maybe I was

cool or whatever. But I would go and all of

a sudden, you know, karate kid it or whatever, and

I'd and my my fist would come right up to

your nose. Or I would do it with my kicking too.

I'd be like, you know, put this little kick right.

And it was so so, you know, it was so dumb.

But anyway, so and I did.

But you want your young bride to know that you

are the man kind of dangerous, ye kind of dangerous.

You're strong.

You do know who you're married, right, So so anyway,

so so I did this thing where she was sitting

down and I was standing up, and I oftentimes did

this where I would just go I was a kick

and I put my foot like right next to her face. Well,

I don't know why, by the way, I did this always,

but I never by the way, I never messed up.

I've never hit anybody ever, as as long as i've

you know, all those hundreds of times that I did.

Anyway, the point is, it's our wedding day.

I've got like dress shoes on, and as soon as

I go to so I'm seeing her sitting there, I

decided to do this kick thing on her wedding day.

At the same time she leans forward to go stand up.

Here's the good news of the story. I did not

kick her in the face. I didn't teach her, I

did not touch her.

Good thank goodness, Liz.

Yeah, However, she went to go lean forward to get up,

and she looked at me and said, Chris, I almost

got kicked in the face because.

On her wedding day, On her wedding day, because because

you know in that thirty minute window that that first look,

everybody needs a good karate demonstration, right right right. Can

you imagine No, no, no, I can't.

Yeah, I mean I would have literally caused her to

bleed or go to the hospital.

Kick her in the head. She go out there with

the black eye. Yes, that's hard to explain.

Yeah, that's right.

Yeah, So anyway, that's my silly wedding day illustration.

Liz.

I'm so thankful that that didn't happen.

I can't believe, she said, I do. Anyways, I know,

just just that the idea that you needed to do

a karate demonstration right before.

By the way, did you know that when it was

time for the bride for my wedding, it was.

A traditional.

When that music started, there was like a five second

delay where she did not walk around the corner, and

for just a split second, everybody's like, what's going on?

But she told me later on it was actually her father,

my father in law, who actually looked at her and said,

are you sure you.

Want to do this? He liked me, he approved of.

Me, but you know, you did see his karate, right,

But he did say, he said, are you sure you

want to do this? He goes, because he goes, I

can cancel this whole thing right now. He's trying to

do his like father, protect the bigger girl thing.

You know, And so she makes sense to me she

was dealing with her dad. But our family was like,

did she run.

That's a great story. Yeah, there you go, that is

a great story.

Thank you, Jeff, What is your story?

Silly thinks. We just didn't know what we didn't know,

you know. So Bonnie and I just so I rented

a house in the woods from a missionary who didn't

live in the US, and I didn't realize it was

a summer cabin. So it had single pane windows and

no insulation in the house. Oh no, and it was

winter and it was yeah, and it was just mud.

So we got married in December and it was just mud.

This wasn't honeymoon.

Well, we didn't have honeymoon. I had like a three

day honeymoon, two nights, two night honeymoon. Then we moved.

We had to move all over this stuff from Michigan

down to Indiana, and so I lost my wedding ring

when we were trying to the load everything out of

the thing. In like two and a half there was

a massive snowstorm in northwest Indiana the day we were moving,

in like three feet of snow, and so then I

get the U haul truck stuck in the hill up

leading up to our place. I dropped my wedding ring

in three feet of snow. It was just one of

these terrible things. And then we went through so much

pro paane keeping that house heated right, because it was

just these crazy things. But hey, we were young and

in love and we're going to just do whatever we

need to do. So we had somebody give us a gift.

Bonnie's dad gave us a gift of a smokeless grill,

and so somebody else came by and they gave us

a couple of Rabbi steaks. And so it was our

first night and I said, hey, let's just grill these

Let's grill these steaks. This is kind of neat, we're

all growing up. So I just set it on the

kitchen table up that bad boy and filled the entire

house of smoke. So we ate our first meal together

as a married couple. That we prepared sitting on the

floor of the kitchen with all the windows open, and

it was like, you know, five degrees outside. It was

so cold and three feet of snow, and then you

couldn't breathe because it was just the whole house was

full of smoke. So I don't know why it meant

why I said smokeless on the box, but it wasn't

smokeless and we discovered that.

Wow.

So then I was going out to close the back

gate of the U haul truck and slipped. And when

I slipped, I put my hands down into the snow

and I stood up with that ring in my hand.

That's not true, that's true. That's true. Yeah. I mean

we had looked for an hour from my ring could

find it. Then when I went to go shut the

gate on the back of the truck, I slipped and

fell and fell right on the ring. Is that amazing? Yeah.

So that's how I knew it was going to work out.

God was so I make really dumb choices and God's

still looking out for me. That's That's how I want

away from.

Okay that that story in itself. Number one, I'm surprised

I never heard that. And number two, that is like,

that's something you could easily pass off as coincidence.

But that's like a little mini mirror.

No.

I've always felt like God's like, I'm going to take

care of you. In spite of you you're such a moron.

I'm to take care of anyways, and that was that's amazing.

Wow. Speaking of making of wedding.

Nights, yeah, yeah, yeah, you go ahead. What was your favorite?

Go ahead?

No, no, you please, I was just going with an

amazing route. Oh, amazing, go ahead, but no wedding nights.

Yeah, wedding night. Well, speaking of wedding nights, uh, maybe

the most scandalous book in the whole Bible, Solomon writing

about his wedding night, Yes, with this beautiful woman. Yes, right,

so let me read the We like the Life Application

Study Bible because the notes are amazing, right, They just

help you understand things. Here's the note about the Book

of Song of Solomon. It says Song of Songs, which

is another name for Song of Solomon, is a wedding

song honoring marriage. So the whole thing is a song,

like a love song. They're writing back and forth to

each other. The most explicit statements on sex in the

Bible are found in this book. It's often been criticized

because of its sensuous language, but the purity and sacredness

of love presented here are greatly needed in our day

in which distorted attitudes about love and marriage are commonplace.

God created sex and intimacy, and they are holy and

good when enjoyed in marriage. A husband and wife honor

God when they love and enjoy each other. So that's

the idea, so almost everything. Don't worry if you have

your kids listening along. It's not overly explicit. It's more innuendo.

Yeah, but yeah, yeah. They don't come right out and

say things.

Yes, So here we go. This is Solomon's song of songs,

more wonderful than any other. And then it starts off.

The young woman is singing to her groom, kiss me

and kiss me again, for your love is sweeter than wine.

How fragrant your cologne, your name is like it's spreading fragrance.

No wonder all the young women love you. Take me

with you. Come, let's run. The king has brought me

into his bedroom. And then the young women of Jerusalem

starts singing with her her bridesmaids, How happy we are

for you, o King. We praise your love even more

than why. And then the bride says, how right they

are to adore you. I am dark but beautiful, oh

women of Jerusalem. Dark as the tents of Keeter, dark

as the curtains of Solomon's tents, don't stare at me

because I am dark. The sun has darkened my skin.

My brothers were angry with me. They forced me to

care for their vineyards, so I couldn't care for myself

my own vineyard. Tell me, my love, where are you

leading your flock today? Where will you rest your sheep

at noon? For why should I wander like a prostitute

among your friends and their flocks. Then the young groom says,

if you don't know a most beautiful women, follow the

trail of my flock and graze your young goats by

the shepherd's tents. You are as exciting, my darling, as

a mayor among pharaoh stallions? Are your cheeks? Your earrings

set them afire? How lovely is your neck enhanced by

a string of jewels. We will make for you ear

rings of gold and beads of silver. And then the

bride says, the king is lying on his couch enchanted

by the fragrance of my perfume. My lover is like

a sachet of myrrh lying between my breasts. He is

like a bouquet of sweet Hannah blossoms from the vineyards

of Ngetti. Then the groom says, how beautiful you are, darling,

How beautiful your eyes are like doves. Then the woman says,

you are so handsome, my love, pleasing beyond words. The

soft grass is our bed. Fragrant cedar branches are the

beams of your house, and pleasant smelling furs are the rafters.

And then the young woman continues, I am the spring

crocus blooming on the Sharon plaine, the lily of the valley.

And then young man says, like a lily among thistles

is my darling among young women. And then she says,

like the finest apple tree in the orchard is my

love among other young men. I sit in his delightful shade,

and taste is delicious fruit. He escorts me to the

banquet hall. It's obvious how much he loves me. Strengthened

me with raising cakes and refresh me with apples, for

I am weak with love. His left arm is under

my head, and his right arm embraces me. Promise me,

he says. She says, a woman of Jerusalem by the

gazelles and wild deer, not to awaken love until the

time is right. And there you go, there you go.

There it is, And I almost want to say like

Forrest Gump.

And that's all I have to say about.

That, right, So what how are we going to commentate

on this?

Well, how they express romance is kind of entertaining to me.

Yeah, well, I mean let's start there.

Yeah, because you know who was it was it John

Eldridge who wrote a book who talked about how every

young man goes through a stage. He goes through a

stage of being a cowboy, have you heard this? A

cow boy where he where he has to you know,

you know, just.

Yeah. And then he goes through a stage where.

He's a he's a lover, where he discovers poetry and

discovers women, and then uh, and then he becomes a

warrior and then uh, you know, you know, he has

what it takes, you know, and he has to prove it.

And eventually he gets to be a king, right, and

the king is when he you know, rules the household.

And then and then eventually every man gets to be

what does he call it a sage? He calls it

a sage where he the wise man. Yeah, the wise

man who actually instructs kings. Right, and so anyway, so

so and again this is just for young men.

It's not for young women.

But as Eldridge writes this, it's the poet. Uh, it's

the poet. That's the stage he was in. And think

about poet a stage. So think about you know, from

the time you started, you know, for instance, like courting

Bonnie all the way through you know you're young, married.

Uh stage.

Uh, that's that's the awakening of this inside of you,

you know.

I remember do you do you ever stumbled across old

love notes that you guys wrote to each other.

Oh, my goodness, we have every single one of them.

Yeah, yeah, aren't they terrible?

Yes? Yes, they were terrible.

Yes, at the time, it was so heartfelt. Back in

the old days, boys and girls, we used to use

paper and pens, and we write notes to each other,

for sure, and nobody does anymore, but.

People say, hey, don't don't delete my text thread right right.

We we would write letters and and we came across

we used to have a whole bag of them, and

came across these things and Bonnie was a much better

writer than I was. Oh they were horrible. It's like,

I'm so embarrassing. You know, these things you just sink.

But that is that moment you're you're this this this

this ability to communicate in a romantic way. Yeah, is

starting to you know, come alive in your life. Well,

I remember, which is really weird.

I remember one.

Time I I had put flowers all over my wife's car.

I would get there late at night, like at midnight,

and her car was in the driveway. It was like

a Chrysler something or the other, like this beige Chrysler.

And I remember and by the way, I stole the

flowers out of somebody's garden.

Which is a horrible thing to do. Did you hear me?

Yes, I stole I stole flowers, but anyway, but I

laid them all down her car. I just covered the

hood and then I wrote a note, a love note,

and put it underneath her windshield. So she came out

and go to work in the morning. But I remember,

like that's a public thing where her father was the

first one to go out and say, Liz, you better

go out and clean off your cards, cover the flowers,

you know. But I remember I used to do stuff

like that all the time, poetry and things like that.

When I was in college. I remember going off to.

College and I was I was I thought at the time,

I was sort of a ladies guy, and I had

a reputation for not being very faithful back in the day.

I was fifty sixteen when I was dating Liz, and

I was I was not very kind or faithful at

the time. We date a lot of girls and jump

back and forth. And so Liz was actually advised by

my pastor, my pastor who she looked up to, and

my pastor's wife especially, and they said, you need a dump, Chris.

So I go to Bible College and I'm eight hunred

miles away.

So she had her chance. She did. She had a chance.

Yes, eight aarned three miles. It is eight airn three

miles from my dorm to her front door. And my

pastor's wife says, yeah, you need a dump Chris. He

is he is going to, you know, be unfaithful to

you at college and all these different things.

So I wrote her.

A love poem and I know it's still oh boy,

it's said, this is a song of Chris, the song

of Chris.

And I, by the way, I had her memorize it

and I told her, I said, I want you to

never forget this.

Oh wow.

She still knows it too. And here's how it went.

You know there was a call from God for a

man to go.

Wait, don't make that contact when you're telling to look

somewhere else, don't. Don't look at me.

Here we go.

Don't look at me.

Here, he goes, Okay, here it is. It's not. It's

more of a statement.

I know. I'm just worried. I'm worried, and I don't

want to have an awkward moment when you're looking deeply

into my eyes. Quoting a romantic poem wrote Till Liz's.

It's more of a declaration about love.

Okay, okay, yeah, it's actually committed. I'm just going to

look away, go ahead.

Yes, it said there was a call from God for

a man to go to school, and no one ever

thought that he'd survived. The distance rule, the rule that

says relationships and time will fade away, and love stretched

out across the mouths grows weaker day by day. 'tis fact.

This common rule applies to shallow people. True, But the

greatest distance will not change the love I have for you.

Wow.

God will bless and strengthen those that pray they're in

his will, And if they be, then they shall see

their love grow stronger still.

How lovely. That's nice. I don't know that it compares.

With Hey, I didn't say I was song of I

didn't say I was Solomon.

Yeah, but I mean Solomon said, if you don't know

al most beautiful women follow the trail of my flock

and graze your young goats by the shepherd's tents.

Well, how can I compare to that?

How can I.

Compare to that? Yeah, okay, we're like the mayor among stallions.

Yes, right, that's right.

Yeah, So it's so funny.

But all that to say, there is a there is

a romance awakening for young men and women, and this

is the stage that they're in expressing their love, expressing

romance and to uh and and this is what this is,

and it's actually a very important part of our lives.

And it's the way that God cradle us.

Yeah. Yeah, it's that mystery and that excitement as as

we read through the rest of us. I don't know

for reading every chapter here, it's only what five chapters long?

Is that right? Yeah? Seven chapters? Eight chapters. Yeah, it's

only eight chapters long. I don't know if we're going

to do the whole thing. I think we will, but

There's what you'll find is they flirt for a while.

Right now, they're kind of flirting, and then they start

getting pretty serious and they are extraordinarily complimentary to each other. Yeah,

we'll talk about that. But you know the thing I'm

struck with on this. I had a bunch of college

guys come to me one time, and my wife and

I delight in each other. Still we've been married for

thirty three years next week. Next week is a thirty

third anniversary.

Wow, good job.

And now yeah, so well, by the time you listen

to this, it will celebrate a third third anniversary.

Yeah, until July.

But we had been married about, I don't know, twenty

years or something, and these young guys came and asked, Hey,

we want what you have. How do we have? How

do we get what you have? You guys, you laugh together,

you're holding hands together all the time. You seem to

really like each other. And for them, in their experience,

their parents who've been married for you know, decades, didn't

have that spark. You know, it was just a partnership

or whatever. And so I said, well, first of all,

you want to find a good Christian girl, but just

barely That was my joke, right, And Bonnie's a little wild.

She's kind of a fun, fun person that way. So

that was my joke. But then I said, actually, here's

what I would say. If you want twenty years in

what you had, you know, twenty months before you said

I do, you have to do what you did. If

you want what you had, you have to do what

you did. And I think a lot of times couples

forget this part. They forget the flirting, they forget that

it feels silly, yeah, it feels whatever. But on a

regular basis, I can look across the room and just

see in Bonnie's eye that funny thing she's thinking, or

that flirty thing that and vice versa, all those private

jokes and private comments, and you know, complimenting each other

and celebrating each other. That's what you're going to find

through the Book of Solomon Song of Solomon is how

often they celebrate each other and compliment each other. And

what they're doing is they're building confidence in the other one,

and they're building up the other one. And when you

work hard to build up your spouse, and then your

spouse hopefully reciprocates that. But whether they do or not,

you do what you used to do in order to

have what you used to have, and you keep that

spark going. And ultimately, as you read through this is

what you're going to discover is it's almost like there's

nobody else in the world except these two, right right,

and there's there's something special about that that you're building,

this this intimacy and this connection that goes beyond. So yeah,

I love it.

Yeah, that's great. And you know, there's a there's a

movie by Tommy Lee Jones. I can't remember the name

of it, but it was it was like a couple

that had been married for forty years. They were in

their sixties, and their marriage was dull, and he was

a typical guy who didn't say much and sat in

front of the TV or something, and she's like, you

know what, I demand.

Romance and she's like, what are you talking about?

And then and then they went through this whole movie

where where she was like, you know, I can't live

this way, and then and and it's this beautiful movie.

I don't even know what it's called.

But at the end of the movie, he had gone

through the whole thing and realized what he had forgotten,

and he had realized that. And so at the end,

you know, here he is this you know, sixty year

old guy, and he's like, I love this woman. I

loved this woman. This guy who like barely talked at

the beginning the movie is now like completely expressive, and

she's that way back, you know, And I'm telling you what,

it was just a beautiful rediscovery of.

This of what we're talking about. Yeah, yeah, which is

really cool.

There's also one more thing in we read into chapter two,

so we read all of chapter one into chapter two,

and in verse one, she's remember the passage she says,

I'm the spring crocus blooming in the Sharon plane. Yeah, really,

I wish it could have been translated slightly different. Really,

what she's saying is I'm just an ordinary flower. Because

the Rosa Sharon and the lily of the Valley were

very common, and so she's like, I'm just an ordinary flower.

There's nothing special about me. Yeah, right, most of the

time women need have kind of a Sometimes I wonder

if I'm enough, right, And his response is perfect because

he comes back and he goes, oh, no, you're extraordinary.

You're literally among thorns, right, you are stunning compared to

all these other horrible women out there, all these other

thorns out there, And so there's something about building the

other one up in the romance thing. A lot of

times people make, yeah, people make mistakes. Making romance be

about their appetites and their desires, Right, what can I

get from you in this hot and heavy moment? As

opposed to how can I build you up and make

you stronger? Because you're going to find it gets hot

and heavy in this book. But it wasn't about what

can Solomon going, what can I get from this vulnerable woman?

But rather how do I build her up in a

way that she understands there's nobody that compares to her

in my eyes, and then vice versa, you see her

doing the same thing. And so in this intimacy, there's

also tremendous amount of vulnerability, and in that vulnerability is

when we begin to learn to trust and believe in

each other. Right, So there's it's just as beautiful. This

whole book is really really amazing. So anyways, we're going

to dig in to it over the next few days.

And by the way, you know, I couldn't let this

go without finding out the name of the movie, Yes

and gets who the wifeless Meryl Street oh okay, and

the counselor Steve Correll.

Wow, so an actual killer cast.

It's called Hope Springs and it's a comedy romance from

twenty twelve.

It's actually really good.

Okay, so all right, well, hey listen, that's our time,

so hopefully we will see you tomorrow on the Bible, guys,