The Silence | Trinity Sermons

The reading is from the book of Acts, chapter

Acts 9:19–30

9, verses 19 to 30. Saul spent several days with

the disciples in Damascus. At once he began to

preach in the synagogues that Jesus is the Son

of God. All those who heard him were astonished

and asked, Isn't he the man who raised havoc

in Jerusalem among those who call on this name?

And hasn't he come here to take them as prisoners

to the chief priests? Yet Saul grew more and

more powerful and baffled the Jews living in

Damascus by proving that Jesus is the Messiah.

After many days had gone by, there was a conspiracy

among the Jews to kill him, but Saul learned

of their plan. Day and night they kept close

watch on the city gates in order to kill him,

but his followers took him by night. and lowered

him in a basket through an opening in the wall.

When he came to Jerusalem, he tried to join the

disciples, but they were all afraid of him, not

believing that he really was a disciple. But

Barnabas took him and brought him to the apostles.

He told them how Saul on his journey had seen

the Lord, and that the Lord had spoken to him,

and how Damascus he had preached fearlessly in

the name of Jesus. So Saul stayed with them and

moved freely in Jerusalem, speaking boldly in

the name of the Lord. He talked and debated with

the Hellenistic Jews, but they tried to kill

him. When the believers learned of this, they

took him down to Caesarea and sent him off to

Tarsus. The word of the Lord. You probably don't

need reminding to know that earlier this year,

the whole world was captivated as we watched

and listened to all the news about the Artemis

2 space mission. This was a fantastic feat. Four

astronauts went further than any human beings

had ever gone before, like over 400 ,000 kilometers

away from the Earth. of reached its turning point

as they looped around the far side of the moon

and then began to head back home. Now that loop

around the moon was actually a pretty dramatic

moment because in that moment, all communication

with the earth was lost. So for a period of time,

the spacecraft just kind of goes silent. disappears

into darkness. And just before they disappeared

into darkness, the pilot, whose name was Victor

Glover, said, you know, we'll see you on the

other side, he said. And then they were gone.

And for 41 minutes, there was nothing. There

was no live voice. There was no real -time contact.

Just onboard instruments. They were completely

isolated from mission control. Until eventually...

They came back into radio contact. They passed

through the lunar horizon, and the signal was

kind of reconnected. And they were fine. They

were fine. They were on their way back. Now,

that is a moment which was pretty tense, because

if you were kind of watching from Earth, you

kind of knew they were still moving, but you

couldn't see them. You knew the mission was continuing,

but you couldn't hear from them. So we're in

the middle of this teaching series we're calling

180, where we're kind of like mission control.

We've been tracking this one fellow whose name

was Saul of Tarsus, and how Jesus totally turned

his life around. In fact, in week one, we saw,

we tracked him as this blinding light from Jesus,

kind of totally reoriented his perspective. Oh

my goodness, Jesus was alive. community in Damascus

kind of rallied around Saul to kind of help him

continue with this transformative moment in his

life. But today, Saul goes radio silent. It's

like, Saul, are you there? Come in, Saul. No,

after all that drama of Damascus, he seems to

swing around the far side of the moon, and for

actually a surprising stretch of time, we don't

really know. what's happening in Saul's life.

Now you may say, well, Rob, what are you even

talking about? I've been reading Acts chapter

Acts 9 · chapter mention

9 with everyone else and I think I'm tracking

with him just fine. And, you know, Rob, for example,

you know, two weeks ago we were tracking with

him and boom, Jesus appeared to him on the road

to Damascus. Saul, why do you persecute me? And

then we kept tracking him into Damascus where

Ananias and the other Christians gathered around

him and he meets all them who were still tracking

with him. And then today we saw him begin preaching

in Damascus. He faced opposition and he had to

be, you know, lowered through a hole in the wall

to escape town. We're still tracking with him.

And then even today, we tracked him as he went

into Jerusalem to meet the apostles. So what's

the problem? We see him. We're watching him the

whole way along. But, and here's a very big but,

when Paul tells his own story later on, remember,

Paul's not writing this. This is the book of

Acts. This is being written by the gospel writer

Luke, right? But when Paul tells his own story,

for example, in Galatians 1, he tells us something

a little different. He says, actually, no, I

did not go up to Jerusalem to see the apostles,

but I went to Arabia. And later I returned to

Damascus and then get this, after three years,

I went up to Jerusalem. Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Whoa, we just lost you. We just lost you, Saul,

right? For three years? There was three. That

was one verse in the book of Acts. But that was

three years where you went completely dark. We

don't know what happened during those three years,

except he says he went to Arabia and then returned

to Damascus. I don't know. But actually, we're

not done yet. Because after those three years,

okay, fine, it was three years that he goes down

to Jerusalem. He gets into hot water again. People

want to kill him again. And so what the disciples

say, they feel that it's just for the best. If

he, you know what, let's get you back to your

hometown of Tarsus. Go back up there until things

cool down, then we'll come and get you. And so

that's what they do. The next time we hear from

Saul, is when Barnabas goes up to Tarsus to look

for him and get him, just like they said that

they would. But that is only two chapters later

from Acts 9 to Acts 11. But most scholars believe

and estimate that Saul was actually in Tarsus

for about 10 years. 10 years. 10 years. So if

you remember the flight path of Artemis 2, let's

look at Saul's flight path, right? He starts

in Jerusalem and he goes up to Damascus where,

boom, he encounters Jesus and meets Ananias and

the other Christians. But then he goes dark and

there is this strange loop. where he goes down

to Arabia and then back to Damascus for like

three years. We don't know anything about that.

But then, oh, there he is again. He appears.

And now he finally is going back to Jerusalem

to meet the apostles. That's what we read today.

But then they send him off to Tarsus, right?

And then apparently he was... in behind the moon

of Tarsus for 10 years before he reappears again.

So Saul actually swings behind the moon twice.

He swings behind it once with the whole Arabia

thing. And then again in Tarsus. And my friends,

that adds up to like 10 or 15 years of his life.

That is not a footnote. That is a whole season

of someone's life. And, you know, we imagine

sometimes that, you know, spiritual transformation

is like far quicker than that. It's more immediate.

And yes, for Saul, there was this very dramatic

turning point. But there was also this long period

of hiddenness, a long period where God is still

at work, I guess. But we can't see what that

looks like or what's going on. But maybe we actually

know how that feels. Maybe you know how that

feels. There are seasons in our own life when

we feel like we've gone silent or our plans have

gone silent or God has gone silent and our future

seems unclear to us. There's nothing dramatic

appears to be happening in our lives. And for

those years, we too might wonder, well, gosh,

is anything happening at all? Am I still on the

right course? Is God doing anything in this dead

zone of my life? And the answer is absolutely

yes. As one commentator puts it, they're called

Paul's silent years because we've got no first

-hand record of them. But they certainly were

not years of inactivity. Something was still

happening. Something was happening. But what?

Well, today... I just want us to look into what

maybe, and I'd say maybe happened during Saul's

silent years, because of course we don't really

know for sure. But as we look into the scriptures,

we start to see clues and hints about what actually

Saul might have been doing. During those hidden

years. And I've given you some teaching notes,

as usual, to kind of follow along and see what

we can learn. So what was Saul doing during those

hidden years? Well, first thing that we seem

to learn is that he went on a little trip. He

wanted to get away. He went on a pilgrimage.

You know, his life had just been turned upside

down. Everything he thought he knew about God

turned out to be kind of wrong. And so he needs

to get away. And so Saul, Paul writes, so I went

away into Arabia, Arabia. Now that's interesting.

Why Arabia? And even the word Arabia in those

days could refer to this great big area. So it

doesn't really narrow it down very much, but

actually we do have a clue. We have a clue about

where he might have gone. Arabia with Mount Sinai.

He talks about Mount Sinai being in Arabia, Mount

Sinai, meaning this. Is it possible that Saul,

during those three years, he took a little pilgrimage

to the great mountain of God, Mount Sinai? Now,

Mount Sinai, of course, was where God appeared

to Moses. Right? This is a little example of

where Mount Sinai might be on the map. No one

knows 100 % sure where it is, but that's kind

of where it is. But Moses went to Mount Sinai

and heard God's voice. God also spoke to Elijah

on Mount Sinai. And so maybe Saul, when he really

needed to hear from God, he said, I know exactly

where to go. I need to go to the mountain of

God. I need to go to Mount Sinai. You guys probably

remember the story of Elijah going to Mount Sinai,

right? It was that story where he experienced

the wind, but God was not in the wind. And then

he experienced an earthquake, but God was not

in the earthquake. And then he saw a great fire,

but God was not in the fire. But then that very

famous gentle whisper came through the silence.

And that's... When Elijah heard what he needed

to hear and he knew what he had to do next. And

maybe Saul, after all that he had experienced,

he needed to hear that voice of God. He needed

to know what to do next. And so he went back

to the mountain of God. He went back to Sinai,

back to the place where God had spoken before.

Sometimes God takes us away before he sends us

out. Saul's first instinct was not, hey, I need

to get busy working for the Lord. No, his first

instinct was, I need to get away and I need to

hear from God. Sometimes the most spiritual thing

we can do is not get busy in our activity for

God, but to withdraw just to be with God, to

step away from the noise. Now, you don't have

to buy a plane ticket to Mount Sinai to do that.

For you, a pilgrimage might be visiting a retreat

center or going up to the cottage or just going

to spend some time by the lake. Or it might even

just be a chair in a certain room in your house

that you go and sit in before everybody else

wakes up. Where you turn off the phone. There's

no more notifications. There's no background

noise. Just a quiet place for you to ask God,

what are you doing? in my life. That may be,

again, we're just guessing, that may be what

Saul was doing in Arabia. We can't prove it,

but sometimes a lot happens on the far side of

the moon in the quiet where nobody else can see

what God is doing. Okay, so that's one thing

that Saul was doing during those silent years.

Let's say he went on a pilgrimage. But here's

another thing. He was gaining a brand new perspective.

Because you see, Saul had a problem. He had a

problem. Imagine you were building like a 1 ,000

piece puzzle you know and you know where everything

goes you know where every piece goes you know

and for saul he knew that this is where israel

goes and this is where the torah goes and this

is where god goes and this is where truth goes

and this is where hope goes and this is where

sin goes and this is where forgiveness goes and

this is where everything he had it all figured

out but on the damascus road when he met jesus

it was as if jesus had come and thrown all the

pieces up into the air all over the place Because

everything that Saul thought he knew about this

crucified false Messiah was obviously wrong because

he was alive and speaking to him, risen from

the dead. And now Saul's got to figure out how

to put all the pieces back together. Or as he

would later say, he has this great line where

he says, I need to take captive. We all need

to take captive every one of our thoughts and

make them obedient to Christ. Christ, right?

He had to start building the puzzle all over

again with Jesus at the center. And I am certain

that during those silent years, Saul spent a

lot of time praying, a lot of time reading the

scriptures and studying his Bible and going back

through the story that he thought he knew and

try to put it all back together again. He's got

to be like, okay, well, if Jesus goes here, then

I guess Israel goes here. And I guess the Bible

goes here. And I guess, you know, hope. and purpose

and meaning and forgiveness. He has to rebuild

it all around Jesus. Years later, Paul would

write that the things that he once thought he

knew and that all the things that he had accomplished,

his ancestry and his religious achievements and

all that stuff, he considered it all like lost

now. He said, whatever were gains to me, I now

consider loss. for the sake of Christ. In other

words, all those pieces I thought were so important,

they don't fit anymore. Not since Jesus came

into my life. It reminds me of Rosario Butterfield.

She has a memoir. Her memoir is called Secret

Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert. But in that,

she talks about her own conversion. She says,

Jesus triumphed, and I was a broken mess. Conversion

was a train wreck. I did not want to lose everything

that I love, but the voice of God sang a sanguine

love song in the rubble of my world. Everything

had fallen apart and needed to be put back together,

the rubble of her world. Or take C .S. Lewis,

who was, according to himself, the most dejected

and reluctant convert in all of England. Why

was that? It's because... After meeting Jesus,

his whole way of thinking was shattered and he

had to put it all back together again. That takes

time, right? Our direction can change in a moment,

but our thinking changes over time. And maybe

you can relate to this a little bit. You thought

you had it all figured out. You thought you had

all the... Questions answered and knew how God

worked and Jesus worked and life worked and all

that stuff. But then Jesus actually came along.

Something happened in your life and it ruined

everything. And now you know, like Saul did,

how long it can take to put it back together.

So definitely during those silent years, he was

putting it all back together. There's a third

thing that he was surely doing besides, you know,

pilgrimage and gaining a new perspective. And

this one is far less glamorous, but he went to

work. And I mean, literally, he went to work.

And I know that when we picture Paul, we tend

to picture him sitting in his study, writing

the book of Romans or preaching sermons and all

that. But he had a day job. Acts 18 tells us

that Paul was a tent maker. And depending on

how you translate that could also mean he was

a leather worker. But the point is he had a job

and it was a manual, blue collar, hands -on kind

of job. So when Saul went home to Tarsus for

that missing decade, this is probably what a

lot of his life looked like. Not standing behind

a pulpit, but, you know, standing at a workbench,

cutting materials, stitching seams, dealing with

customers. It's not something that we often picture

Paul doing, but for many hidden years. The future

apostle to the Gentiles was just going to work.

And he was not embarrassed by this. Again, he

later wrote, you yourselves know that these hands,

these hands of mine supplied my own needs and

the needs of my companions. He knew what it was

like to come home tired. He knew what it was

like to have deadlines and to work with difficult

customers. He knew what it was like to have to

do the same thing day in, day out, over and over

again. But while Saul was working at his job,

God was working on Saul. I mean, we often imagine

that the really... important spiritual parts

of our life happen you know on sunday morning

or they happen when we go on retreats or mission

trips um and those things matter but actually

most of your life is lived at work at a desk

or in a classroom or at a construction site or

in a hospital or wherever you work at home with

children that work isn't something you get through

Before you can do something more spiritual. No,

God is actually forming us there too. And maybe

your workplace is actually teaching you patience.

Maybe those difficult customers are actually

teaching you grace and forgiveness. Maybe all

of that God is using to make you more and more

like Jesus. So sitting at a workbench for five

or ten years. I mean, Saul didn't know that one

day he'd be. enshrined in stained glass or his

letters were going to be read all around the

world. He just worked and God worked too. So

the hidden years were years of pilgrimage, years

of perspective, years of just working at his

profession. And one more thing, certainly they

were years of pain because whatever happened

during those silent years, they could not have

been. Easy years. Almost immediately, we read,

as Saul begins preaching in Damascus, what happens?

The Jews were trying to kill him. He had just

arrived in Damascus, and he had letters of authority

from the chief priest back in Jerusalem. He had

status. He had reputation from the high priest.

And now he's leaving Damascus. How in the middle

of the night in a basket? Like, that hurts. And

then when he finally gets to Jerusalem, He tries

to go and meet with the other apostles, but they

don't trust him. And then on the other hand,

the Jews there, they want to kill him. So he's

stuck between these two worlds. The people who

he persecuted are now afraid of him. And his

old friends see him as a traitor. And then I

sometimes wonder, even when he got back to Tarsus

for that decade, what was life like there? You

know, he had family and friends there, but how

would they react? How would you react? You know,

when your friend Saul comes back and says, hey,

you know, remember Jesus, that guy I went to

Damascus to stamp out? Well, I met him and it

turns out he's alive. And I was wrong. And I

mean, there must have been no shortage of arguments

and disagreements and broken relationships. for

him to deal with. N .T. Wright actually wonders

if maybe Saul was actually married once, but

his new allegiance to Jesus ended that relationship

too. We don't know, right? We don't know all

this, but I think it is safe to say Saul lost

things. He lost his status, his security. He

lost his belonging. He lost a whole bunch of

relationships. Reminds me of a story. of a guy

named Nabil Qureshi. Qureshi was a brilliant

medical student and a deeply committed Muslim.

And when he became convinced that Jesus was the

Lord, his first reaction was actually not celebration.

He says, the day this happened, I fell to my

knees and I cried. I said, God, I will give up

everything for you, but please don't make me

lose my family. But then he goes on to say, actually

following Jesus meant losing everything I had

ever known. But when I looked at the cross, I

saw a savior who had given up everything for

me. Lost everything he had ever known. He even

lost his family. Sometimes a 180 is exhilarating.

Other times it hurts. And Saul understood that.

Sometimes pain. It's part of the process. Pain's

not good. You know, broken relationships are

not good. They hurt. But God can work even there.

And some of you, again, you know exactly what

I'm talking about because when you decided to

follow Jesus, it actually made life harder for

you. But like Saul, some of our deepest formation

happens in the dark, in those silent seasons.

So like Victor Glover said, mission control will

see you on the other side. And they did. Artemis

II disappeared for 40 minutes, and that didn't

mean they had stopped moving. And that didn't

mean that the mission had stalled. No, that silence

was actually part of the journey. And again,

if you're here today and you're wondering, gosh,

why is God so quiet? In my life, it feels like

it's been years since I felt that God was really

driving me. Maybe the better question is not

why is God so quiet, but what is God doing to

me in the quiet? Just don't assume that nothing

is happening because some of the most important

work God does in our lives happens in silent

times, slow times, even painful times when no

one can see it. Saul's hidden years. Were years

of pilgrimage, perspective, profession, and pain.

He seemed silent. But when he emerged from the

far side of the moon, it was clear God had been

doing something in his life. And we're going

to see next week that, yeah, Saul of Tarsus went

into the silence. But Paul, the apostle, came

out the other side. Thanks be to God. Amen.