A Very Mary Christmas

I think it's appropriate to pray one more time and then we're gonna jump into the message.

It's a pretty quick one this morning, though.

So, Jesus, speak to us, use your word, teach us something, God.

I pray that we would all experience this season, this holiday season that I believe you've set apart for us.

I believe that we would I want us to experience it the way you want us to, Lord.

Help us focus on what's most important this time of year.

Help us connect with you today, help us walk out of this room closer to you than when we came in.

And I pray this in your name of Jesus.

Amen.

Okay, really quick question.

If you could have one item on your regular to-do list taken off your plate, one one thing that is a constant in your life.

It's a to-do item that's always on your list.

You have to do it on a regular basis.

If you could have one of those removed, you don't have to do it anymore.

What would it be?

Anyone have anything?

Thanksgiving.

Oh, someone said it.

Laundry.

Laundry.

Anyone else would say say laundry?

Oh, I am with you.

I am with you.

So I've got a lot of things on a to-do list every week, like everyone.

Elon just talked about to-do list a few minutes ago during the welcome and whatnot.

Laundry is one of the things that I do.

My wife and I really do it together.

We have four children, so there's six of us, which is a weird thing.

Sometimes we go to restaurants and they'll look at us and say, How many?

And I'll say six, and it doesn't sound right.

I'm like, surely not.

Surely there's not six of us here.

And I'm like, oh, there are.

So when you have six people living in a house, you never stop doing laundry.

There's no such thing as laundry day in our home.

You never, ever stop doing laundry.

And when four of those are children, like you never stop doing laundry, and it's it's the worst.

It's the worst.

Like, those of you who don't have kids or you don't have kids at home, maybe, you know that whole phenomenon where you lose socks?

Like you start with pairs and somehow the socks get lost?

Okay, when the socks are this big, all right, it doesn't get better.

It's not like, it's not like you find them easier.

It's weird.

Like socks disappear left and right.

Um, I'll do sometimes I'll do a load of laundry, forget that it's in the washing machine, come back the next morning and be like, are you kidding me?

And I have to rewash it again and again and again.

You guys ever do that?

That happens all the time in our house.

The worst though, and I know some of you will relate to this, anyone here ever accidentally wash either like a diaper or a pull-up that one of your kids has?

Anyway, like raise your hand if you've ever done that.

All right, for those of you that don't have your hand raised, it's the worst thing that could ever happen as far as laundry is concerned.

Like two, our two middle kids still wear pull-ups to bed every night because they might have a nighttime accident.

And so in the morning they'll get up and they'll change, and oftentimes they'll just sort of pull their pull-up and their pants down, it'll be in one ball.

And we do a really good job.

We try at least to do a really good job to check for that when we're putting clothes in the laundry, like make sure there's no pull-ups that have gotten mixed in with the clothes.

But sometimes one slips through.

And what happens is that inside of a pull-up, if you've never dissected one, there's like all these tiny little like pellets, and they're there to absorb liquid.

And when they do, they grow and they have this sort of gel-like feel, and it's real gross.

And uh, and when you put one in a washing machine and you submerge it in water, it expands as far as it can possibly expand until it just explodes.

And so you'll open up the washing machine, you'll pull clothes out, and there'll be all these like white specks all over everything, everything, and just try try to get them off the clothes.

You can't.

You cannot do it.

And you realize what's happened, and you have to like reach in and pull out all this goop and throw it on the ground, and you know, words are popping in your head, and you're trying not to let those words come out of your mouth.

Um, you're doing your best.

And it you have to wash those clothes like two or three more times just to get that all out.

It's the worst.

So if I could have one thing on my to-do list removed, it would be laundry.

Um, I'm not asking for any of you to come do my laundry.

I'm just saying if there was a way to get that off my to-do list, I would take it.

I'm sure we all have something like that.

And the reality is, Elon spoke about this a few minutes ago.

This is a time of the year where our to-do lists multiply exponentially.

Just out of curiosity, how many of you, when it comes to the holidays, you're done?

You are 100% done.

Everything is decorated, every gift is purchased, every gift has been wrapped, right?

Everything's done.

Who's got it all done?

You?

Either you're amazing or you're like, I'm just not doing it this year.

I'm not, I'm done because I'm not doing anything, you know?

Whatever.

But like, think about it.

Some some of us, I mean, we we still have, you're like, Justin, please don't talk about this.

You're stressing me out.

We have gifts left to buy.

We got to figure out what we don't even know what to buy for certain people.

So part of our to-do list is just figuring out what to buy in the first place.

We've got to buy the gifts, we've got to wrap the gifts.

Some of us are traveling, like, who's gonna travel this holiday season?

All right?

Those of you who are traveling, you've got to think about how are you gonna travel?

Have you gotten tickets yet?

If you're driving, are you gonna get your cars oil changed?

Make sure you've got, you know, safe travel as you go.

Are you gonna pack?

How much are you gonna pack?

Have you packed yet?

Like all these things.

Have you figured all that out?

There's a lot to do.

Decorating.

Like, who's got everything decorated so far?

Totally done.

Not many of us.

Who's just saying, I'm not gonna decorate this year?

More of us than raised our hands for being totally done decorating.

So there's a lot to do.

In fact, I want to bless you guys this morning with an opportunity just to get your to-do list figured out.

Because it's the holidays, and that's what this time of the year is for.

Going nuts.

That's what it's all about, right?

So let's just do this.

Let's just do this for 20, 30 seconds.

I want, I'm gonna have Alex, if you'll play some Christmas music, and let's just all think about all the things we have to do between now and Christmas.

And like, be specific.

I don't want you to go like buy presents.

Think about all the people you need to buy presents for.

Don't be general, like, use this opportunity to get ahead.

Let's just take 30, 30 seconds a minute, and let's all together think about all the things that have to get done.

Does that sound fun?

Let's do it! Come on, let's do it.

Hit it, Alex.

Let's get in the spirit.

Everywhere you go, take a look at the five and ten.

I'm thinking of my list now.

But the prettiest sight to see is the hollow that would be on your own.

Don't forget about those little things like buying tags for your presents, bows, you know, that's not gonna get done on itself, like on its own.

You gotta do that.

Think about those things.

Anyone cooking?

Anyone cooking for hoi?

Yeah, think about that counts.

Think about all the dishes, all the ingredients.

Everywhere.

Who's feeling good?

Anyone?

Alright, you guys can bring that music down.

Yeah.

Fa la la la la la la la la.

That's what you're all thinking, right?

There's a lot to do.

There is a lot to do.

And if you're feeling stressed out, if you're like, why did I come to church this morning?

You know, I come and now I'm stressed out of my mind.

I'm thinking about all this stuff I've got to get done.

I hope to alleviate that to some degree this morning.

What is going on?

It's all good.

Keeps me on my toes.

Um, I actually want to read a story, a story from Scripture, a story from Jesus' life that is so pertinent to this time of the year.

It's so important, especially as we begin to enter this season of life, this season of the year where our to-do lists explode.

It's a story of Jesus visiting some friends, some friends that were very close with him.

Uh, it's a family actually that Jesus was really tight with.

There was a man named Lazarus.

Lazarus has two sisters, one named Martha, one named Mary, and Jesus visits them really shortly before he goes to Jerusalem, where he's crucified.

It's in Luke chapter 10, starting in verse 38, it says, As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem, they came to a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home.

Luke 10 · chapter mention

Her sister Mary sat at the Lord's feet, listening to what he taught.

But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing.

She came to Jesus and said, Lord, doesn't it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work?

Tell her to come and help me.

But the Lord said to her, My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details.

There is only one thing worth being concerned about.

Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.

So I want to explore this story and how it relates to this time of the year for us and our crazy schedules and our crazy to-do lists.

And I want to preface this by saying, or really asking, is there anyone named Martha in the room this morning?

Any Martha's?

Okay, for none in the room, or at least none brave enough to raise your hand.

Um, but in case there's a Martha listening to the podcast, don't be offended this morning.

This is like we're we're gonna talk about Martha, and just like Jesus does here, Martha's kind of on the wrong end of a lesson being taught, and so her name becomes synonymous in this teaching with what not to do.

But Martha was awesome.

Martha was a close friend of Jesus.

Martha was someone that Jesus would have commended.

Martha is someone that Jesus would have spoken very highly of.

So this isn't about dogging on Martha.

Likewise, are there any Marys in the room?

Anyone named Mary?

All right?

Mary's, do not let today go to your head.

Okay?

Stay humble.

Because we're gonna use your name in a really positive sense that we want to be Mary, right?

We want to have a Merry Christmas.

That's the actually the title of the message.

Have a very Merry Christmas, but Mary being M-A-R-Y, not M-E-R-R-Y.

But Mary's, stay humble.

All right?

It's not about you, right?

It's about this other Mary, but you're just your name lucked out this morning.

We have these two sisters, and this amazing thing happens.

Like, really think about this.

Put yourself in their shoes.

Jesus, he shows up to have dinner with them.

And if you if you understand their culture a little bit, number one, you have to know that Jewish culture was all about hospitality.

There were laws, there were rules and regulations about how you had to be hospitable.

And so just imagine if our culture one day, someone you didn't know, someone you never met before, a perfect stranger, knocks on your door and says, Hello, I am very weary from traveling far.

Can I please stay in your home and eat with you?

You would call the police.

That's what you would probably do.

But that was a really normal thing in Jewish culture at that time.

Hospitality was something that people were expected to do, even to perfect strangers.

So Jesus isn't just a stranger, though.

He's not just a guest, he's Jesus.

He is by far the most talked-about person in the whole area at this time.

He is the biggest celebrity in the nation.

And so it's not just that Martha and Mary have a guest in their home and they have to be hospitable because that's the custom of their day.

It's that they have an esteemed guest.

They have a guest who's highly honored.

This is Jesus.

This is the man that everyone is talking about.

Everyone, anywhere you go, is talking about Jesus and what he can do and what he's taught and all the miracles he's performed.

It's Jesus, and he's in your home.

And beyond that, they believe that Jesus is the Messiah.

They believe beyond the shadow of a doubt that he's from God.

We know this because a little bit later on, their brother Lazarus passes away.

And Jesus comes back, he ultimately resurrects him.

But Martha says to Jesus, well, actually, we'll start with Jesus talking in John 11, verse 25.

John 11:25

He says, I am the resurrection and the life.

Anyone who believes in me will live even after dying.

Everyone who lives in me and believes in me will never die.

Do you believe this, Martha?

Yes, Lord, she told him.

I have always believed you are the Messiah, the Son of God, the one who has come into this world from God.

So you're Martha.

You have a a guest in your home, okay, and in your culture, you're supposed to be hospitable.

You're supposed to cook them some food.

You're supposed to make them comfortable, provide a place for them to be.

Number two, it's not just any guest, it's Jesus, the biggest celebrity of the day, that this guy that everyone's talking about, he's an esteemed guest, he's an honored guest.

Now you have even more pressure.

And beyond that, you believe he's God.

You believe he's the Messiah, the Son of God.

You believe he's divine and he is in your home.

And if the Son of God is in your house, what do you do?

You serve him, right?

You serve him, you do things for him.

I mean, it says that Martha has this big dinner prepared.

You know, number one, Jesus didn't travel alone.

He always had a posse with him, always had at least 12.

So there's other people there.

She's got this big meal that she's got to prepare.

You know that she's trying to bring out the big gun.

She's trying to cook her best meal.

She's trying to do it the best that she possibly can.

She's trying to make this a really special event, a really special moment.

There's a lot of pressure on her because the son of God is in her living room and she's got to cook him a meal.

A meal for not just him, but all of his friends, all the people traveling with him.

She's got all this pressure because he's the son of God.

And if he's in your home, what do you do?

You serve him, you do things for him.

And you have Mary, and she's not doing anything.

She's not doing anything.

Anything at all.

And number one, they're siblings, so that makes it hard.

You know, we've got four kids, like I talked about, and it's funny because they are very keenly aware of what the other person is and isn't doing at all times.

We get status updates all day long.

Sometimes my daughter Lil will just walk up the stairs completely unannounced, no reason.

She'll be like, hey, I just want you to know that Liam is not cleaning the basement like you asked him to do.

Judah has made a huge mess, and we're like, thank you for the update.

Thank you so much.

You know?

That's something that's just part of being a sibling.

So you've got that going on, but but to Martha's credit, she's working her tail off, trying to serve the King of Kings a meal, and Mary's just sitting there, doing nothing, hanging out.

So you can understand Martha's frustration when she walks in and says, Hey Jesus, would you mind?

And I love it, because like Mary's right there.

She could come in and be like, Hey Mary, could you help me out?

She doesn't do that.

She's like, um, Jesus.

Would you mind reminding Mary that I could use some help in the kitchen?

That'd be great.

You know what I mean?

And Jesus says, you know what?

Martha, and again, if you're a Martha, don't be offended because Jesus loves Martha.

He says, Martha, you are so worked up over all these details.

But Mary's actually chosen the one thing that matters most, and I'm not going to deny that from her.

And I don't think Martha was expecting that answer.

And the question becomes, well, what is Mary doing?

What is the thing that Mary has chosen?

And the reality is, it's very simple.

She's just chosen to be with Jesus.

Martha is concerned with doing things for Jesus.

But we don't know that Jesus asked for any of those things at all.

Maybe Jesus wasn't even hungry.

Maybe Jesus just wanted to hang out with some friends.

Maybe he didn't want to have a big meal.

Maybe he didn't want to have a big to-do.

Maybe he just wanted to rest and relax and talk to some people.

Who knows?

But Martha is obsessed with doing something for Jesus.

And Mary is focused on doing something with Jesus.

And one of the things that we learn from Scripture is that God, God always prefers with over for.

He does.

We see this time and time again in Scripture.

For example, in Proverbs 21, verse 3, the Lord is more pleased when we do what is right and just than when we offer him sacrifices.

Proverbs 21:3

And just so you understand the concept, it's saying that God prefers righteousness over sacrifices.

In the Bible, righteousness always has a relational connotation.

In fact, the word righteous means right standing.

So to be righteous means to have a right relationship with someone.

And what he's saying there is that God prefers that we just be in right relationship with him.

He prefers that over us offering sacrifices to him.

He would rather us be with him than do all these things for him.

Jesus, he lived that out in his time on this earth.

We don't just see it in the Mary and Martha story.

We see it, for example, with his disciples.

Right before Jesus gets arrested and goes to the cross, he is distressed.

And he goes and he prays.

And we see in in Matthew chapter 26, it says, Then Jesus went with them to the olive grove called Gethsemane, and he said, Sit here while I go over there to pray.

Matthew 26 · chapter mention

He took Peter and Zebedee's two sons, James and John.

Those are his closest three friends.

And he became anguished and distressed.

And he told them, My soul is crushed with grief to the point of death.

Stay here and keep watch with me.

He doesn't ask them to do anything for him.

Jesus is at his low point.

He's at this point where he's like, I am anguished, I am distressed, I've got this huge thing coming, the cross, and I know what it brings, I know how hard it's going to be, and I just want my three closest friends with me by my side.

That's all he all he desired.

He didn't say, Do all these things for me, he said be with me.

We want kind of an alarming example of this.

Jesus taught in Matthew chapter 7, verses 21 through 23.

Matthew 7:21–23

He says, Not everyone who calls out to me, Lord, Lord, will enter the kingdom of heaven.

Only those who actually do the will of my Father in heaven will enter.

And we read that and we go, Oh, so maybe it is about doing things.

Okay?

But he goes on, he explains.

He says, On judgment day, many will say to me, Lord, Lord, we prophesied in your name and we cast out demons in your name, and we perform many miracles in your name, but I will reply, I never knew you.

Get away from me, you who break God's laws.

And so what Jesus shares there is, look, this isn't religion.

You know, if you're here, maybe you're new to this whole Jesus thing, I want to I want to assure you of something.

It's not religion.

We say this over and over again because it's so easy to forget.

This is not a religion.

Religion is about the things you do for God, all the things you have to do to please God, all the all the things you've got to cross off that list so God might be be pleased with you.

This is not religion, it's relationship.

Jesus uses this teaching.

He says, Hey, at the coming you know, judgment, which there is one, he says, There will be people who say, Lord, I did all these things for you.

I did all these things, I prophesied, I spoke, I preached, we performed miracles in your name.

Look at all the things we did.

And Jesus says, Yeah, but I don't know you.

You did things for me, but but you didn't have a desire to know me.

Jesus always prioritizes relationship over like acts of service.

And they go hand in hand, right?

Like when you when you love someone, do you want to do things for them?

Absolutely, right?

Absolutely.

Some of you guys might be familiar with the idea of love languages.

Like when you love someone, how do you express that love?

You know?

And sometimes we have love languages like the way we like to receive love.

What is it?

It's acts of service is one, words of affirmation, physical touch, gifts, quality time.

Is that the five?

Is there are there more?

No?

Okay, so yeah, thanks, Steve.

Um, I can remember five whole things.

It's awesome.

So, you know, the the love languages I would like to receive are physical touch and words of affirmation.

So basically, I just need Megan to make out with me and tell me I'm really good at it.

That's like what I want, that's what I need.

I need those two things simultaneously.

Kiss me and then say, ooh, you're a good kisser.

That this is who thank you.

Um makes me feel good.

But as far as as the acts of love that I most naturally display, I'm an acts of service guy.

I really enjoy doing things for my family.

I really do.

And it's weird because like with my kids, I'm I'm probably gifts.

I like to buy them things, like to buy them gifts.

That's something I enjoy doing.

With Megan, though, I love doing things for her.

I enjoy doing the dishes.

I enjoy, if she's gone, I enjoy like cleaning the house and surprising her.

Sometimes I'll even mess with her.

You may have done this before with someone you love, or she'll call and like, oh, it's been a stressful day, and the kids have been crazy, and I just want to prepare you in advance.

When you get home, it's nuts.

And she's like, okay.

And then she comes home and the house is all clean, and I'm like, give me some physical affection and words of affirmation, you know?

Come on.

I did good, you know.

But I like to do those things.

When you love someone, of course you want to do things for them.

That is normal.

But you would never want to do things for them at the expense of spending time with them.

You would never want to do things for them instead of doing things with them.

You would do things for them on top of doing things with them, but you would never do things for them and not be with them.

It would be so strange if the relationship I had with my wife was such that, you know, she got home every day and I'd cleaned and I had maybe cooked some food and you know, everything's nice and laundry's done, and all of the diaper pellets have been cleaned and all that kind of stuff is done.

But I'm not there.

She shows up and there's a note that's on the table that says, Hey, I did all these things for you because I love you so much.

I love you, so I did this for you, I did this for you, I cleaned, I cooked, everything's good.

Um, I'm out, I'm hanging out with my friends.

I'll don't wait up for me.

You know?

Like maybe once every once in a while that would be like, oh, okay, well, sure, that that happens.

But then if the next day she she got home and there's another note and it says, Hey, I'm not here tonight.

Um, I love you so much.

I want you to know I took out the trash and I paid the bills and I made sure to take care of this and this and this, and you're all good.

I love you.

Um, don't wait up for me.

Like if that was an everyday thing, we wouldn't have a relationship.

I would walk through the door one day and she would go, Who are you?

I'm the guy that did all the things.

But the truth is, when you love someone, when you really love someone, you do not prioritize doing things for them over spending time with them.

They go hand in hand.

But but it all comes out of relationship.

And so Jesus, he's not knocking people who serve him.

He asks us to serve him.

He asks us to serve each other.

He's not knocking service.

He modeled service, but it's always through the context of relationship.

It's about being with, not just for.

So let's go back to that to-do list in our minds.

If you were gonna categorize all the things that popped into your mind as you were making that to-do list, how many of them fall in the for category?

And how many of them fall in the with category?

I mean, literally, think about the next month leading up to Christmas.

I believe today is November 25th, right?

So we got one month.

What kind of month do you want to have?

Do you want to have a Martha month and Martha's again?

Sorry, you're great, and don't take it personally, or do you want to have a merry month and Mary's don't let it go to your head?

Like, what kind of month do you want to have?

A Martha month or a merry month?

What kind of Christmas do you want to have?

Does anyone here want to have a very Martha Christmas?

Or do you want to have a very Merry Christmas?

Do you want to spend time with the people you love?

Do you want it to be a year where you're with and not for?

And if that's what you desire, if you're like, yes, I do want with, I absolutely want with, well, now is the time to decide to do that.

Now is the time to decide to prioritize that.

And so again, when it comes to the people you love, the people in your life, think about all the things you've got to get done, all the things on your to-do list from now until Christmas.

And I have some questions.

Number one, are all of those necessary?

There's something about this time of the year where we can get ourselves wrapped up in the things that we say are for other people, but really it's kind of for us because we really like to do it.

You know, that's something that if we're really honest, we all have those things.

Like, no, no, no.

I'm doing this for the family.

Truth be told, the family doesn't even care.

They don't care at all.

Like some of you, maybe you cook really hard for your family, and maybe you're not a good cook.

And your family's like, I would just rather you order pizza, to be honest.

You know?

And I can save you.

I'm teasing.

Come on.

Teasing.

I some people are like, that's that's too far.

That's like when you said dogs might not go to heaven a few weeks ago.

That's just way too far.

And again, I don't know.

Don't do it, it's just a thought.

But if you weren't here for that, just disregard that statement.

So but no, seriously, like maybe there's things on that for list, the things you're gonna do for all the people, and maybe maybe some of those things aren't even that important.

But they're gonna take you away from the people you're doing those things for.

They're gonna take your energy and your time away from actually spending time with those same people.

Are there some things on your to-do list that really don't need done?

And if that's the case, why don't you cross a few of those off and make some room this holiday season to spend time with those people?

Maybe there's some things on that list that just needs swapped.

Maybe over the years there's there have been more traditions and more things piled on.

I mean, we're at this point now where when you know when you get married and you have in-laws and there's a whole other family over here, and there's a whole other family over there, and people come in from out of town, and and you can just like go here, there, and everywhere, you know, and it's it's crazy.

And the only time you actually have to talk to the people you're closest with are when you're in the car going from one place to another.

Well, really pray.

I'm serious, pray and say, hey, it are are all those trips necessary?

Or maybe do I need to cancel one or two so I can spend time with the people that I love most and that I need to spend time with.

Maybe there's some opportunities for you to swap some of those things on your four list for some with experiences.

You know, I look back to my time growing up as a kid and Christmas, and I think the things I look back with the most fondness of, the memories I have that are the best, are my family watching movies every Christmas season.

And uh we our movies were Christmas Vacation and Scrooged with Bill Murray.

Those were our family Christmas movies.

I never saw It's a Wonderful Life till I was like 30.

I was married and Megan's like, hey, let's watch Christmas movies.

I'm like, cool.

Christmas Vacation and Scrooged with Bill Murray.

And she's like, What?

She's like, no, it's a wonderful life.

I'm like, I have no idea what that is.

And so she made me watch it.

It was great, it was awesome.

I love that movie.

I like Jimmy Stewart, he's the best.

But but I love the memories I have of sitting on a couch watching those movies with my family.

Are there any experiences like that that you would love to have?

Well, decide now to have those, prioritize with, and if you have to cross a few fours off the list, do it.

Now, let's be honest though, there are some things in that four category that have to get done.

Like laundry has to get done in my home.

As much as I'd love it to not be necessary, it is.

And if I spend a whole week saying, you know what, instead of doing laundry, I'm just gonna love on my kids.

And we're gonna spend time together, and every hour I would be folding laundry and doing laundry, we're just gonna, I'm just gonna hug them.

By the end of the week, they would smell horrible, but we'd all be loved, you know, it'd be okay.

You know, I'd be like, hey, if your friends ask about the smell, just tell them, I don't know, but I love you, you know, whatever.

You gotta do certain things.

So I know that there are things on your to-do list in that four category, they have to get done.

I get that.

Could they be done with the people you love?

Could they be done with those people?

Years ago, I read a book by a coach that I really admire.

Uh, he wrote a book on leadership, and I was reading this book, and he was talking about his family experience.

And he's a coach at a college, and it's a very demanding job.

And he wrote that his job was such that he knew it would either take him away from his family, or he would have to find ways to include his family in it.

And so he had these young daughters, and one of the things that he would have to do as a coach would be watch game tape as soon as the game was over.

So he'd come home from the game and he's got to immediately watch the game tape.

And he created a tradition in his home where he had his daughters watch game tape with them.

That was actually part of their like responsibilities.

Hey, I watch game tape with dad, and he would include them in it and say, Hey, did you see anything?

That good point.

Yeah, absolutely.

I agree with that completely.

And so he found ways to include his family in what he was doing so that it wouldn't take him away from them.

And his family has talked about that and how much that has meant to them and how close they are because of things like that.

Maybe there are some things on your four list that have to get done.

They have to get done.

But maybe the way you normally would go about it would just be to do it away from the people that you love.

Maybe there's a way to include them with it.

You know, maybe it's wrapping gifts this year, and and usually you do that on your own.

Maybe include some of the people who obviously whose gifts aren't present.

Maybe you create a new tradition.

If you've got kids, say, hey, one kid at a time, you're gonna help me wrap a gift for one of the other kids in the family or for someone else in our family.

I'm gonna include you in the wrapping process.

And you know what?

Those gifts are gonna look horrible.

They're gonna look bad.

Kids can't wrap gifts, they're not good at that at all.

You know, men can't really either.

I'm I'm bad, not all men, but like any guys like me, like when you try to wrap a present, you're like, I'm just I'm sorry.

I don't know what happened.

You know, it's not that.

Yes.

Every time I look at a piece of paper in a box, I'm like, this isn't hard.

And then halfway through it, it's like I'm a first grader again.

And I'm Megan hands me the safety scissors, and it's just she's very encouraged.

She's like, no, it's it's fine.

It's I'll just I'll do it, you know?

Are there some things on your four list that you can do with the people you love?

Look at Jesus.

That's how he lived his life.

He had a lot to get done.

You know how much of it he did alone?

Almost none.

There are very few stories of Jesus by himself.

There are very few stories of Jesus off on his own.

I mean, just like this moment here, the Garden of Gethsemane, we just read it.

Jesus needs to go pray.

He's got to go spend some time with God.

He's got something really important to figure out because he's about to go to the cross.

It's a big moment, but what does he do?

He includes, he brings people with him.

Look through those things on your to-do list this holiday season and think what things on this list can be done with people and decide, decide to do it, to do it with the people you love.

Worship team, you guys can come out.

And we've been talking about the people in our lives.

How if we're gonna be like Jesus, we're gonna take the lessons that he taught us, we should do things with them instead of just things for them, that we should value relationship.

And that's so important.

I really want to encourage you guys.

I hope today's practical, I want to encourage you to look at that to-do list in your mind and ask yourself, are these with or for?

And if they're all four, figure that out.

Replace them with some withs or find ways to turn those fours into with moments.

But I would be remiss if we just talked about the fact that this season is about us spending time with other people.

One of the easiest things to do as a believer is go through the Christmas season, do a lot of things for and a lot of things with other people, and come December 26th.

We haven't we haven't given God a second of thought.

We've just been too busy.

And it would be it would be sad if we get all the way through the holiday season and we don't spend time with him.

With him.

And so again, think through that to-do list and know in your mind that you can modify it.

It's your to-do list.

I mean, there's there's days where I don't do anything on my to-do list.

You know, I actually enjoy those days.

Sometimes those are the best days.

Like, what'd you do today?

I didn't do anything.

Sometimes those days are really stressful.

But it's your to-do list, so you can modify it, you can tweak it, you can change it all you want.

Are there any things on that list that include you and God?

Like from now until the 25th, you got a month.

It's a time of year that's all about Jesus, right?

It's Christmas.

He's the Christ part of Christmas.

It's all about him coming to this earth, and yes, our culture is taking it and making it about gifts and Black Friday, which has somehow become Black Thursday and Wednesday, and it's just like, it's just all shopping, you know?

And yeah, there's there's all this stuff in our culture that really doesn't have anything to do with Jesus that we give a lot of attention to.

And I'm not saying Santa Claus is bad and you're evil if you, you know, Santa Claus and all that.

I'm not saying that, I'm not one of those people.

But, you know, Santa's great.

He's not Jesus.

And sometimes even with our kids, it's this time of the year where we're like, well, we gotta do the Santa thing and do the Santa pictures and get Santa, all this stuff.

What about what about him?

What about Jesus?

I'm just saying that it would be it would be a miss.

It would be a miss for me personally.

I think it would be a miss for anyone who considers themselves a Jesus follower to get to Christmas and be like, oh man, I've been so busy.

I haven't had time to spend with Jesus.

He's Jesus, he's what Christmas is all about.

And so again, think through that list in your mind.

Is there anything on that list that has to do with him, with you and him?

And and if there's not, man, put something on there.

And if you've got to bump some other things off, so be it.

If there's some cousin that you never talked to and really don't even like that much that you're not gonna hang out with because you're gonna hang out with Jesus instead, I'm just saying.

So win-win! I'm sorry.

I get cynical sometimes.

I don't know why, I just get cynical.

I actually like all my cousins, so I feel like they're gonna listen to this and be like, which am I the cousin he's done?

No, you're good.

But my point is, this is not a time of the year where Jesus should be at the bottom of the list.

There really is never a time of the year where he should be at the bottom of the list.

But thank God that we live in a culture that gives us this month-long reminder, oh yeah, Jesus.

And so take advantage of that.

Think through that to-do list, and man, put some time with him on it.

Put some time in prayer.

Put some time just reflecting on who he is and worshiping him.

Start a new tradition in your family.

Hey, you know what we're gonna do on Christmas Eve as a family?

What if what if we sat in a room together, put some worship music on, and just sat and worship Jesus together as a family?

You know, I spend time with him.

And here's the beautiful thing, and we'll wrap up with this.

He wants to spend time with you.

He wants to be with you.

He's not some God on top of a mountain asking you to do a lot of things for him, he wants to do things with you.

I mean, Jesus said it, he said it so well.

Matthew chapter 11, verses 28 through 30.

Matthew 11:28–30

Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.

Take my yoke upon you, let me teach you, because I'm humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls, for my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.

He's saying, Come to me and let's do life together.

You guys may not have farmed before, and if you have farmed, maybe you haven't used oxen, but that's the analogy that Jesus is speaking of is oxen.

This is what oxen with yokes look like.

When we think of that like phrase, be yoked together, that's what he says, take my yoke upon you.

We often think that like Jesus is gonna put us on his shoulders and carry us, or maybe Jesus is in front of us and he's pulling us.

That's not how yokes worked.

This is the mental picture that every person Jesus was talking to would have had.

It's two oxen side by two oxen side by side.

And what you would do is you would take the weaker oxen, you would put it right next to a strong oxen.

You would yoke those oxen together, and that weak oxen would be walking alongside with the strong oxen and would actually think it was doing the same amount of work.

It would feel like that.

It's like, oh man, we're really pulling this stuff, aren't we?

And the strong oxen's like, we sure are, you know.

But eventually that small oxen would grow and get stronger and would begin to be capable of doing a little bit more and a little bit more, but it all happened because that oxen was alongside the other.

So when Jesus says, Come to me, you who are weary, he's inviting us into relationship.

He's saying, Hey, you don't have to do this on your own, let me be part.

Come alongside me and I'll carry the weight.

This is Jesus offering relationship to us.

If you're here this morning and you don't have a relationship with Jesus, and what I mean by that is not that you don't believe in Jesus, maybe you believe in Jesus.

Maybe you serve, maybe you do things for Jesus, and I'm not demeaning all that, but do you know him?

Do you want to know him?

Do you enjoy time with him?

Do you look forward to time spent in his presence?

Do you do you long for it?

Do you do you ever have moments where you're like, I just I just need to go be with my God?

I just want to go be with him.

That's what relationships are all about.

Like, do you know Jesus and do you want to know Jesus?

And I just want you to understand that if you're here and you don't know him, you can't say, Yes, I know Jesus.

He's offering that.

He's saying, look, come to me and let's do life together.

Let's live life together.

Bring me in.

Bring me in.

And you know what?

To do that, sometimes you gotta rearrange the whole to-do list, but so be it.

If I have to take my entire to-do list in life, all my goals, all my dreams and aspirations, if I have to crumple those up and throw them away just to be with him, so be it.

Because I want to be like, I want to be like Mary.

I want to choose that which is most important.

I don't want to waste my life and waste my time.

I don't want to waste the next month caught up in all the things I'm supposed to do for other people and for this and for that and for the church and for all this and get to December 25th and be like, oh yeah.

I forgot to sit at the feet of Jesus and be in his presence.

There's nothing that's that's worth more than that.

I want to be like Mary.

I want to have a very merry Christmas.

And so we'll wrap this up and we'll pray.

We have an opportunity ahead of us.

We have a month.

That's awesome.

It's one month to Christmas, and either that freaks you out and you're like, no.

Or you're like, thank goodness I have a month.

A month is a long time.

It really is.

Like a month, it is a long time.

You can get a lot done in a month.

It's not the day before Christmas, it's the month before Christmas.

So you have time right now to evaluate.

You have time to look at all the things that you're planning on doing in the next four weeks and say, do they really matter?

Are they for or are they with?

You have time to reevaluate.

You have time to say, you know what, I'm gonna shift my priorities a little bit.

I'm gonna take some of those four things and bump them down.

I'm gonna I'm gonna create some space for spending time with my family.

I'm gonna create some space for spending time with my God.

And you know what?

Let's pray.

Let's let's do that right now.

Let's worship with one more song and let's use this as an opportunity, not to walk out of these doors and go do something for someone, but there's time for that.

There's time for that today.

But let's take a few minutes and let's just spend time with God, worshiping him.

And by the way, as we do this, sometimes I start sentences and I don't finish them.

It's my brain.

I just said a minute ago, if you don't know Jesus, you can know him.

And what I mean by that is it's it's it's just you answer the call that he's already given.

He has said, Come to me, all you who are weary and carry heavy, heavy burdens.

He might say to us, Come to me, all you who are stressed out, burned out.

Come to me.

And all you have to do to start that relationship is say, Jesus, I'm coming to you.

I believe in you.

I'm gonna look at you, I'm gonna put you at the center of my life, I'm gonna make you the one I follow.

That's what it means to start that relationship, and it's a beautiful thing, and I encourage you to do it.

And if you do, just do it in your heart right now.

Share it with someone, go sign up and get baptized.

Like, do that right away.

Seal it because it's awesome, it'll change your life.

Okay, pray with me.

I love you guys with all my heart.

Jesus, thank you so much for this morning.

Thank you, God, for all the lights.

Thank you for all the decorations, thank you for all the reminders of how exciting and special this time of the year is.

And Lord, I pray in your name that you would you would give us the ability right now to decide what kind of month we're gonna have, what kind of Christmas we're gonna have.

Are we gonna have a Martha Christmas or a Merry Christmas?

Lord, make us like like Mary, make us the people who choose to put you at the very top.

Make us people who choose to value being with you and being with the people we love over just doing a lot of things for everyone, especially over doing things for ourselves.

We want this to be a holiday season that is defined by that word with.

So give us the wisdom, the discernment, the courage to make decisions this month that that lead to that happening.

And bless us, God.

Bless everyone in this room, lift our spirits if we're struggling.

Give us a heart of compassion for those around us who are.

Help us serve each other, Lord.

We love you with all of our heart.

You're you're everything to us.

It's in your name we pray, Jesus.

Amen.

Merry Christmas, guys.

Fala la la la la la la la la.