Message - Figuring Out Freedom

We are going to start today a study on what might be one of the most complex and complicated sections of scripture that we have.

If you're new, what we do on Sundays is we spend a significant portion of time just opening up scripture, opening up the teachings of Jesus and the teachings of his followers, the people that he tasked with really teaching the world and leading the world into his movement, the greatest movement that this world has ever seen.

And we open up scriptures and we say, okay, what does this say?

What does this mean?

And for the last year, we've spent a lot of time in this one specific letter in the New Testament.

It's the letter of Romans, and it's pretty deep stuff.

And so what we've done is we've I've kind of looked at it like scuba diving, like we've gone down deep and then we've come up for air every once in a while, and then we'll go back down.

Well, today we're gonna we're gonna go back down, and this is this is a complicated one, but it's super cool.

It's it's so, it's so, so cool.

Because this section of scripture helps us do something that's actually very hard to do, and it's something that very few people ever ever figure out.

This section of scripture helps us begin to understand ourselves a little bit.

How hard is it when you're around someone you don't understand?

I've been married for 15 years, and my wife is a mystery to me very often.

You know, I've got these four kids at home, and I've I've known them since they were born, and yet I'm confused by them on a regular basis.

You know, they I just don't I don't understand you.

Why do you respond that way?

Why do you think that way?

It's difficult when you live with someone you don't understand, but what if the person you live with and don't understand is you?

Like you're the only person you can't get away from.

Let me read a section that we're gonna end up going through.

Uh this is Romans chapter 7, verse 15.

Romans 7:15

This is right smack down in the middle of this section we're gonna be studying.

The author Paul writes, I don't really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don't do it.

Instead, I do what I hate.

Anybody relate to that at all?

Like, why do I do the things I do?

How about this one, a few lines later, verse 19.

I want to do what's good, but I don't.

I don't want to do what's wrong, but I do it anyway.

Like the number of days that I wake up going, today's gonna be one of the good ones.

You know, today I'm gonna be productive, I'm gonna get stuff done, and I'm gonna be loving and patient, and and I'm just gonna, I'm gonna be an awesome husband and an awesome dad and a great person at work.

I'm gonna do all those, I'm gonna do it right, and then by like, I don't know, breakfast, uh I have fallen far short of my expectations and hopes.

And sometimes I don't get, I don't get it.

Things will trigger me and and and get me fixated on the wrong thoughts, the wrong things, and I don't understand myself.

And honestly, I know I asked, I want to ask again, does anyone have the courage to admit that, like, yeah, that's me.

I don't get myself a lot, and sometimes I wish I could take a vacation from myself, but I can't.

It's vital that we understand ourselves.

In fact, a good friend of mine, uh, Fred Goodwin, was talking a few weeks ago to a group of guys here at the church, and he quoted this very ancient quote uh from an author that literally thousands of years ago wrote a book called The Art of War.

And what the quote was is that if you really want to be victorious in battles, you have to do two things.

You have to know your enemy and know yourself.

If you know your enemy but you don't know yourself, you're only gonna win half the time.

It's vital that we know ourselves.

It's vital that we understand ourselves.

And if you're a Jesus follower, um stay encouraged, don't let this get you down.

But but I want you to know if you're a Jesus follower, what's what's happening inside of you is more complicated than you might understand.

And in some ways, those of us who follow Jesus, we kind of have more going on than people who don't.

Because it's not just us in here, right?

It's Him too.

It's crowded.

Like I'm in here, but so is God's spirit.

And sometimes we don't agree and we don't see things the same way, and we don't have the same priorities, and we don't have the same values, and there's like this tug of war that happens, and and it can be actually disheartening sometimes being a Jesus follower and dealing with this sort of internal struggle, but we're gonna deal with that over the next few weeks.

And if you're here, if you don't miss a service, I'm I'm don't miss a message.

Even if you can't be here in person, if you have to watch online, if you have to listen to the podcast, this is so vital.

It's the key to understanding ourselves.

But going about it's gonna be a little bit different.

I'm just gonna be honest, I've never had as much trouble figuring out how to approach a section of scripture as I've had with this, because uh, well, there's just there's a lot here.

Let me let me show you this.

I brought this pad to kind of help me with this.

This is a list of some of the concepts that are covered in this section of scripture.

It's the basic stuff, right?

Sin and death and sin's relationship with death, uh, slavery to sin, new life, dying with Christ, being raised by Christ.

Uh that means like raised to life by Christ, not like he's your dad and he raised you as a child.

Raised by Christ, flesh and spirit, easy stuff, humanslash sin nature, the law of Moses, that's everybody's favorite.

Um, sin's use of religion, uh living by the Spirit, dying to the law, natural hostility to God, no condemnation for those who follow Jesus, adoption into God's family, and having divided desires.

You know, just a few things.

Like, I mean, I literally I sat this week going, how am I gonna approach this?

There's so much stuff, and it's not linear.

You know, it'll be one thing if you read this section, and I encourage all of you read the whole thing.

Today we're gonna kind of pull verses from different places in this section.

Today's kind of a framework for us to get this started because I really believe this is vitally important, but we've gotta have the right frame of mind if we're gonna understand it, if it's gonna really hit home and apply.

It's not just that there's all these concepts, it's it's that they're not linear.

It's not like Paul the author is going one by one and defining them, the whole thing is mixed together.

I actually drew a diagram of what this section looks like.

Um and uh this is how my brain has been all week long.

This has been my brain as I've been reading this, because Paul will talk about one of these things, then he'll talk about it again, and then he'll have this little tangent side thought here, and then he'll come right back to it and he'll talk about it, and then he'll be like pretty much the second half of chapter seven is like right here, and then you come back around, and there's just there's no way to approach it.

And so I like metaphors, I like to think of things that help me understand it.

Like, God, help me, like you, Holy Spirit, you co-authored this, right?

Like you were you were speaking to Paul, and he and so it just you I feel like you should have used an outline or something.

Like, help me out, help me understand what what I'm dealing with here.

And God gave me a really silly analogy, but I I I love it.

It's uh soup, right?

Raise your hand if you know what soup is, if you've ever eaten soup.

Is anyone here confused by soup?

Okay, if you are, I have a diagram to explain soup.

Um this is something uh I gotta give credit to Madison Tompkins.

We actually had a uh a debate in the office one day about what actually constitutes as soup, like what counts, because we were gonna have this Super Bowl party thing when COVID was all going on, uh, and I guess it still is.

I don't even know, who knows?

Um, but uh but like we're gonna have this Super Bowl party, and so we're like, well, what counts as soup?

And this was something that Madison really helped develop.

Um, this this line represents how much liquid there is.

This is like liquidiness, if that's a word, liquidity, I don't know.

And this line is the size of the ingredients, okay?

So uh this dotted line here is the threshold to be counted as soup.

As you can tell, it's not a high bar.

Pretty much anything can be soup, okay?

So, like right here, this would be like pot roast, large ingredients, a little bit of liquid, but not much.

It's not soup.

But then there's like a stew right here, and then this is like a vegetable soup, and then you're getting into like bisque territory right here.

Um and by the time you're up here, you're like tomato soup, like it's just liquid.

Um, but that's soup.

And Romans 6 through 8 is soup.

It is spiritual soup, and it's kind of like right here.

It's it's pretty it's pretty thick, it's pretty chunky, but every single bite you get a little bit of this.

I'm gonna move on from the soup thing.

Um, if there could be a word that I would use to describe this, if the soup had a name, all right?

I am done with the soup metaphor.

Uh, it would be freedom.

This section, at the end of the day, is all about, it's all about freedom.

I mean, let me read a key verse.

Romans 8, verse 2 says, Because you belong to him.

Romans 8:2

And I don't know if you think in those terms very often, but when you've given your life to Jesus, you belong to him.

Like he's paid for you.

He gave his life for you.

And you're his, and that's a beautiful thing because you you want to belong to the King of Kings.

And he loves you enough to actually take ownership to say, like, yeah, they're mine.

They're mine.

So you belong to him.

It says, because of that, the power of the life-giving spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death.

Because of what Jesus did on the cross, you have 100% been freed from the power of sin and death.

Now, if you're not familiar with the concept of sin, sometimes in our culture that it's like such an ugly word.

Sin's a really basic thing.

It's just anything that isn't the best.

That would be the best way to describe it.

It's actually an archery term.

Anything that's not the bullseye, it just misses the mark, that's sin.

And sin is selfishness, and it's it's just us doing what we want to do, and it's it's all around us, and it leads to death, it leads to brokenness.

We're gonna talk about that a little bit this morning.

And for all of human history, we have all been subject to the powers of sin and death.

There's a concept in our faith, the concept of original sin, meaning that we have sin in us from birth, and some people get offended by that, and I don't understand it.

I just I they have to have not had children.

You know, that's the only way I can understand it because like I've never had to teach one of my kids how to lie.

I've never had to teach one of my kids, like, I I watched my my uh five-year-old sucker punch my 11-year-old the other day, and like take him down.

And and Judah, my he got mad and he ran up and he did like this leaping uppercut right across my oldest son's face, and I was like, oh my goodness.

And there's part of me that was kind of proud.

I don't know why.

I'm like, that's my but then there's part of me like, oh no, you know, this is terrible.

What's going on?

I didn't, I've never done that, I've never sat Judah down and be like, hey, when he gets on your nerves, just watch this.

Like, this has never happened.

They figure that stuff out on their own because there's something inside of us from birth that's just it's it's off.

There's like a selfishness that's there.

There's this willingness to do terrible things to get our way.

That's why it's a blessing from God that children are tiny.

You know, and other creatures on earth, they grow to maturity really fast.

Can you imagine if a three-year-old was adult sized?

It'd be that you you would like to move out.

You would be, this is the most terrifying creature on the planet.

You know?

The only reason I get to win these fights is because I can physically pick my children up and put them places, and that's that's all we've got.

Because of that whole, that whole sin thing.

It's a real thing.

It's a real thing.

And and it's and it's something that that we can't escape on our own, and it leads to death.

But Jesus has freed us from the power of sin and death.

So what that means is we actually could live a life free from the influence of sin, free from selfishness, free from just being dominated by our desires.

We could live a life free of fear, free of the fear of death itself, free of fear of the unknown, anxiety.

We could be free of all those things, but but oftentimes we're not.

So why don't we experience that?

If he's freed us from the power of sin and death, then why aren't we all living free?

Why is it that that like none of us could say, I haven't experienced any of that ever since I gave my life to Jesus?

And those of you that haven't given your life to Jesus yet, I'm not trying to like be a bad salesperson, you should do it.

But it's not like you're gonna wake up the next day and just see colors that have never existed before.

Or have like a six-pack if you don't already, you know.

I mean, I obviously do, but uh, I'm not gonna show you because that would be prideful.

I'm just just trust me, it's it's somewhere under there.

Um but like that's not how it is, it's not this just instantaneous everything is great, it's a process.

And so why is that the case?

And why does this have anything to do with freedom?

Okay.

I'm gonna go to the next one.

Uh, freedom is actually really frustrating.

Because freedom has to be figured out.

You know, as a nation, we are a we're a free country.

We're a free country, one of the few free countries that has ever existed in the history of the world, and in many ways, that makes living in America amazing, unlike any other place, and it also makes living in America a very odd experience because people do funny things with freedom.

When you're free, you have to figure things out.

Like if we just had a monarchy or some authoritarian government that we had to obey, and there's definitely people that that would like that.

And there's places on the earth that are very much like that, and it's not good, but it's easy.

Because you don't have to figure anything out, you just have to do what you're told to do.

It's as simple as that.

Whether that thing that you're told to do is good or not good doesn't matter.

You were told to do it, you have to do it.

But when people are free, they have the responsibility at like an individual level to figure out what they're going to do with their freedom.

And that's a frustrating experience because if you're not free, you always have someone to blame for your problems.

There's always someone external that you can look at and say, Well, they're the problem.

But if you're if you are free, at some point you have to look at yourself and go, well, maybe some of the responsibility for the way that life is, maybe most of it, lies with me.

Because I have this freedom and I'm making these decisions, and this is how it's turning out, but there's something about us that just wants to deflect.

I'll give you an example.

When I was a youth pastor for about 10 years, um, I would always spend time with my students and especially the the older students, the juniors and seniors, and uh, and there would be a constant frustration of parents being too controlling, you know, parents just being way too controlling.

And they'd be like, oh, my parents are always telling me what to do, my parents always tell me where I can't go, where I have to go, you know, all those kinds of things.

My parents, I just wish they gave me more freedom.

And then what was so interesting is when they would graduate high school and they'd move on, maybe they're in college, maybe some of you are in this stage of life right now, you can really relate to this.

Um, they would, they would, we still have a relationship, and so they would tell me how frustrated they were, but it was for the exact opposite things.

They're like, oh, my professors, they don't they just won't tell me what to do.

You know, they won't, like they won't give clear instruction on exactly what they want, and so I have no idea.

I'm trying to guess what they want to do, or I have this job and they haven't properly trained me, they haven't told me what to do enough.

And I'm like, well, you have exactly what you you said you wanted.

You have freedom to figure it out.

They're giving you the freedom to figure it out.

I don't want that.

Like there's just part of us that wants freedom, but then also just wants someone to tell us how to do things so we don't have to put the effort in.

But the reality is freedom is a beautiful thing, but it's frustrating.

It has to be figured out.

We have to learn how to live in freedom.

And that's what this section of scripture helps us do.

Because, like I said, freedom's kind of messy.

And if you follow Jesus, you have to understand.

If you want to be successful in this, if you want to experience the freedom that he's given you, if you want to experience all the good things that God has for you.

By the way, does anybody want to experience all of the good things that God has for you?

Like all of them, not some of them, not half of them, like a good, no, you want to experience everything, right?

The grace and the love and the mercy, and but also the power and the peace and all of that.

You want it all, okay.

Well, the only way to even come close to experiencing what has been won for you by Jesus Christ is to understand this internal struggle, this internal mess as you figure freedom out, what's going on and how it works.

And like I said, over the next few weeks, we're gonna go really specific, but today I just want to give us a framework to understand what this whole section is about.

Okay, so let me show you this.

This is something that I actually think about pretty often.

It's something that God just keeps bringing my brain back to and uh and kind of keeps teaching me this, and this is something that I use a lot in my life.

It's very helpful to understand the mess that is me, because I'm I'm messy.

I don't understand myself often.

Um two columns.

We're gonna start here.

Uh, every single person in this room, everybody watching from home as well, you were all born.

Does anyone disagree with that statement?

Do I have to spend any time proving to you that you were born?

No?

Okay, good.

All right.

When you were born, you you are you have what the Bible often calls flesh.

That's a word we see in the New Testament a lot.

Um, but some translations will call it your nature.

When you're born, you get a nature.

There are things that you do naturally.

And you might use language like, this is just who I am, this is the way I'm wired, right?

This is that's your nature.

And your nature, it's your thoughts, it's your desires, it's your imagination, it's like the places your mind runs, it's it's it's all those things.

It's it's your body and all that too, but it's it's like it's you.

That's your your nature.

Now, here's the fundamental question.

Is our nature fundamentally good or flawed?

Now, a lot of you said flawed, some of you are probably like good, but you maybe don't know if you can say that.

And the answer is kind of complicated, right?

Because some of the things that like again, I'll use my kids as an example.

Sometimes they do the the sweetest things.

And it's like, wow, that was amazing.

And then other times they they do things, and I'm like, they're just a terrible person.

Um, like I have to figure this out.

And the clock's ticking, and I'm I'm I don't think my kids are terrible.

I love my kids, but I'm I'm kind of sarcastic in my humor.

My point is, it's complicated.

Now, our world is very confused on this subject.

Our culture will tell us, no, no, no, you are naturally good.

That's why our culture's value is to be yourself.

That's the greatest thing that our culture will tell you to be, is just you.

You just be you.

If you can be the most natural you that you can be, that is where life gets really good.

Scripture has a little bit of a different perspective.

So let me let me show you a few verses that come from this section that we're going to be studying.

Let's look at Romans chapter 7, verse 18.

Romans 7:18

He says, I know that nothing good lives in me, that is in my sinful nature.

Some translations will say flesh.

I want to do what's right, but I can't.

Romans chapter 7, verse 25.

Romans 7:25

In my mind, I really want to obey God's law.

In my mind, I want to do the good thing.

I want to do what God wants.

But because of my sinful nature, I am a slave to sin.

Now, our culture might see that and go, that's offensive.

But stick with me.

Let's look at Romans 8.5.

Again, this is all part of that same section we're going to be studying.

Those who are dominated by the sinful nature think about sinful things.

Dominated by this nature.

So it doesn't speak about the flesh in good terms.

And again, our culture will say at one hand, that is offensive.

How can you say that?

How can you say that naturally we're broken?

How can you say that we're dominated or even enslaved by our nature?

That is not that's not okay.

But at the same time, our culture is very confused.

At the same time, you've definitely heard this, you may have even said this before.

It's okay if you have.

It's what we're programmed to to say and think.

Um, I'm only human.

Right?

I mean, how many of us have heard that, like as an excuse?

Hey, I'm only human.

Is that a high view of humanity or a low view?

You know?

And that's like saying, don't set the bar too high.

I'm I'm only I'm only human.

You know, you can't expect too much.

Well, how does that track?

Our culture says that we are naturally good, but then all the hey, I'm only human.

I can't use those two things, they don't line up, right?

Or how about this?

I can't I can't help the way I feel.

I can't change the way that I feel.

I just, I feel so, I just I feel so strongly.

I I have to do this, I have to, I have to be with this person, I have to follow my heart because I can't change the way I feel.

Well, is that a statement of being empowered?

Or is that a statement of slavery?

Is that any different than saying, oh, I'm totally a slave to my nature?

I literally have no power.

I am dominated by my desires.

No one would say that, but we would say I'm only human and I feel really strong.

I can't change the way I feel.

So what I'm trying to say is that our culture, deep down inside, understands that this is the case.

There is something about us as people, naturally, that that gets off track and it pulls us down, and we feel kind of powerless against us.

And and what we what we see in scripture is that that leads to death.

That leads to death.

We can look at Romans chapter 6, for example, verse 23.

Romans 6 · chapter mention

For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord.

Now, again, we might say I think that's a little harsh, but but it's not.

I mean, really think about it.

When when I go completely and totally rogue, I'm doing my thing my way, it leads to death.

It leads to the death of my self-respect sometimes.

I've lost a lot of respect for myself, doing exactly what I wanted to do.

It leads to the death of maybe respect that other people might have for me.

It leads to the death of trust, it can lead to the death of a relationship, it can lead to the death of a career.

It's just it's just it's what it does.

And here's what I want us to understand this is so vital, guys.

This is the way pretty much everybody lives.

The easiest way to sum this up is I just Do whatever I want to do.

I do what I feel like doing.

And we live in a culture, and I'm not trying to knock our culture too much today.

I'm just trying to help us understand that Jesus is different than our culture.

The message of Jesus, the core values of Jesus are different than our culture.

And he will tell you something different.

He'll give you an entirely different perspective on life and who you are and who you could be than the world gives you.

The world will tell you that really you can't help yourself, don't even try, you're powerless, you just follow your heart and hope that that leads to a good place.

It uses better language than that.

It puts it to the tune of Disney songs and stuff, but it's not good advice.

Because a person who just lives life going, I just do whatever I feel like doing, I do what I want to do.

It leads to death.

That's a self-centered way to live.

But this is this is our nature.

This is how we're born.

Jesus comes along and he changes things.

Romans chapter 8, verse 3 says, So God did what the law could not do.

Romans 8:3

He sent his own son in a body like the bodies that we sinners have, and in that body, God declared an end to sin's control over us by giving his son as a sacrifice for our sins.

So Jesus shows up and he does this whole thing, but he does it in a way no one else has ever done it before.

And he was born, he didn't sin, and he experienced death on our behalf, and so something happened, something changed.

And now we get to this second column.

And again, all of these concepts, they're like all through Romans chapter 6 through 8.

Romans 6 · chapter mention

This is a framework, and this is huge for us understanding the mess that's going on inside.

When you give your life to Jesus, you're born.

Just you're born again.

What's that little again right there?

Makes a big difference.

John chapter 3, verse 3, Jesus says, I tell you the truth, unless you're born again, you cannot see the kingdom of God.

John 3:3

It's a very famous conversation between Jesus and a man named Nicodemus in John chapter 3.

John 3 · chapter mention

He says, You gotta be born again.

Now, when I said earlier everyone in here agrees that you were born, no one challenged that.

How about this whole born-again thing?

Does everyone understand that?

Would you agree that when you give your life to Jesus, you're born again?

Something new begins inside of you.

Yeah, you believe that.

And I think what's hard is that we believe that intellectually, but sometimes it doesn't feel as real as this first birth.

And just understand that anytime we usually say, This is who I am, this is just the way I'm wired, we're almost always talking about this column.

We see ourselves in the flesh much easier than we see ourselves in the spirit, but it shouldn't be that way.

And we're going to talk about that.

Because when you're born again, you get a new nature.

A nature that actually lines up with God's nature, a nature that actually desires the things that God would desire for you.

And very often that nature is called spirit.

John chapter 3, verse 6, Jesus says humans can only produce human life, but the Holy Spirit gives birth to spiritual life.

John 3:6

When you give your life to Jesus, it's like something turns on, and it's the Spirit of God active inside of you, bringing you to life.

Romans chapter 8, verse 2 says, Because you belong to Him, the power of the life-giving Spirit, we read this earlier, has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death.

Romans 8:2

It's the Spirit inside of you that is doing that work.

Romans 8.16 says that his spirit joins with our spirit to affirm that we are God's children.

His spirit joins with your spirit.

Romans 8.6 says, letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death, but letting the spirit control your mind leads to life and peace.

And that's where we get to the bottom right here.

Living by the Spirit creates life.

Now, it's all nice and mapped out here.

I'm a logical person, so I can think this way and enjoy this.

Like, okay, I got column one, I have column two.

And please understand that every decision we make as people, whether you're in your 70s or you're in your teens, every decision you make, you're appealing to one of these.

You're appealing to one of these births.

And you might even use that language, I was born this way.

Well, which birth are you talking about?

And again, I found that usually when we use that language, this is just how I was born, we're always talking about here, but what about this birth?

It counts.

How amazing would it be if someone ever came to you and said, Man, why are you so full of joy?

And you're like, I was just born this way.

Like, why do you have so much life?

Like, why why is your why why is your life so focused on the right things?

And why are your priorities in order?

And why do you just seem to have this lightness and this joy to life?

And you have peace when everybody else is freaking out and you're like, oh, I was born this way.

Because I'm not talking about this birth anymore.

I think in these terms.

We have to understand this, guys.

This is powerful because it's true.

When you were born again, that was a real thing that happened.

The Holy Spirit is actually inside of you, it's not a metaphor, and even if it doesn't feel this way, you have the very power of God at your disposal at all times.

Which means that if you're struggling with something, if you're constantly struggling with the same issue, you have to understand what's going on inside of you.

Let's say, for example, you have an addiction, and you might even say, I am addicted to this.

Well, hold on, be careful.

Because your flesh might be addicted to that, but the Holy Spirit inside of you is not.

If you say, Hey, I've got an anger problem, I have kind of a temper, like I'm like, I'm just saying this about myself.

I'm Irish, and uh Irish people are known for a few things, being short and having bad tempers.

Short and short fuses.

That's what we're known for.

Um, and so like I become a different person sometimes, especially when there's like a ball in my hand.

If you hand me a ball of any kind, a ping pong ball, a basket, it doesn't matter.

I just like become a little bit less of a good person.

That's just how it's I get competitive, right?

And I could say to you, well, that's the way I am.

That's just that's just me.

Well, no, it's not.

That's this me.

But the Holy Spirit does not have an anger problem.

And the Holy Spirit is not temperamental.

And if you handed the Holy Spirit a basketball, he wouldn't be a jerk.

Okay?

That's not that's not me, that's that's my flesh.

But we've got to change the way we think.

We've got to stop thinking that this is the real us and this is some kind of real, quasi-real, maybe one day it will be real.

No, no, this is the real you.

Because one day this is gonna die, but this is not.

And one day you're not gonna be bound by any of this stuff anymore, and you will spend all of eternity living like this, and it's gonna be beautiful and wonderful and amazing, but you don't have to wait till heaven to start living out of your spirit.

But see, it's it's about do we understand what's going on inside of us?

Like Paul wrote, I don't understand what's going on inside of me because while this is nice and neat and tidy, this is how it actually feels.

Right?

This is a diagram of me yesterday.

But I'll give you an example, and we'll we'll get close to wrapping up.

Um I was supposed to have a very different week than I had.

Megan was gonna take all of the kids and go visit a friend.

It was spring break, and I wasn't really able to take work off this week.

I was on vacation a few months ago, and that was there's a lot going on right now, and it's good, a lot of good things happening.

And so I was like, I can't really get away this week.

But she's like, no, no, we're just gonna go and we're gonna go spend time with those friends, and we'll you'll be by yourself.

And my brain was like, What?

Like, what is better?

A week with my family or a week without my family?

You know?

Like if we're only talking about a week, you know, not the rest of my life, just a week.

And I was, I mean, I'm there's part of me inside that was like, you know, externally, like, oh, really?

I don't I miss you guys so much.

And then there's this other part of me that's like, this is gonna be the greatest week of my life.

This mess going on inside of me.

So on Wednesday morning, they they left.

And on Wednesday night, Megan called me and she said, Hey, Eli, who's our youngest, he threw up.

And so I think we're just gonna come home.

And I was like, like, no.

Part of it was like, no.

It's like you can't, I've only had, I haven't even had a day, you know?

Like, there's games that were gonna be on TV at like 10 p.m.

and I was gonna watch them with the volume on, without Megan being like, go to bed.

And I'm like, stop telling me to go to bed.

Uh, you're you're not my mom, I don't have a bedtime anymore, okay?

This has been going on since I was 21 years old.

Just let me watch the game.

Like, it hadn't even happened yet.

But then there's this other part of me, the spirit part of me, that was like, no, I don't want my family to miss out on the because they were having a blast.

And there's this internal tug of war going on, flesh and spirit.

And so I made the spirit decision.

I was like, you know what, I'm gonna do?

I'm gonna go drive up to where you're at.

It was about an hour and a half away, and I'm gonna get Eli, I'm gonna bring him back with me.

And I'll take Eli and it'll just be me and him.

And that's cool because I don't get much one-on-one time with him.

You know, he's my youngest and he's always tagging along with somebody else, and so I'll be with Eli.

And uh and then you guys can have your vacation.

And Megan was like, that would be amazing.

And so I did that, and you know, mostly like good about it.

Yeah, this is gonna be great, and it's different than what I wanted, but man, spending one-on-one time with my son is so much better than having me time, right?

Yeah.

Spending two days taking care of a of a three-year-old uh who just doesn't feel good and demands his own way and will literally projectile vomit if you give him milk.

For some reason, maybe he's lactose intolerant.

We're figuring it out.

It's great.

It's how I wanted to spend those days.

But the truth of the matter is I really, really enjoyed it, and I also didn't at the same time.

Why?

Because I don't understand myself.

The spirit inside of me wants to do what is good, wants to live to serve people, wants to love my family, wants to love everyone that's here, everyone that's part of this community.

But there's another part of me it's that flesh thing.

And there's a battle happening inside of me.

It's a battle for control.

And day by day I'm trying to live, learning to let the spirit have its way.

It's not about me, it's not my effort.

That's flesh.

It's learning to live, it's letting the spirit live through me.

And the point I'm trying to make is that this is a big mess, and this is all of us.

Some of you are really good at hiding your mess.

Some of you are not.

But this is all of us.

And here's where this is really beautiful, and this is where we're gonna explore for the next several weeks is that you, because of Jesus, you have the freedom to figure it out.

God loves you so much that He has given you, He's freed you from sin, He's freed you from the power of death, and now you actually have the freedom to figure this whole thing out in relationship with Him.

Like that's a beautiful thing.

Because you might have a job one day, or maybe it's the job you have now, and you don't have the freedom to figure it out.

It's either perform or or leave.

It's either do your job well or there's no there's no space for you here.

Oftentimes we find ourselves in dynamics and relationships with people where we don't have the freedom to figure it out.

That's not the dynamic.

But with God, the Father, He loves you, He died for you, Jesus came, died for you, God gave His Son up for you, you have the freedom to figure it out.

So if you're a little messy, if you don't understand yourself, if you're kind of at war with yourself like I am on a regular basis, good news.

God loves you, and He's freed you, and not only has He freed you, He has the patience and love to give you the freedom to figure it out.

So it's okay if you don't understand yourself.

It's okay if right now you don't you don't quite grasp why you you are the way you are.

It's okay if even when you give your life to Jesus, you go, why then am I still dealing with this?

We want to move past that.

We want to grow.

But know that as you're dealing with all that frustration, God's given you the freedom to figure it out.

So figure it out with Him.

And that's key with Him.

Philippians chapter 2 verse 13 says, God is working in you.

Philippians 2:13

God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.

Who's the one giving you the power?

Is it you?

It's not your flesh.

No, it's God.

Ephesians 3.20 and worship team, you can make your way out.

Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.

You have no idea what you're capable of.

And and that that mess, we'll go back to this.

I think this is a good visual for us to close on.

This is me.

I'm being honest.

It used to be a lot worse.

You should have seen the old mess.

But but you know, sometimes when I get a real glimpse of what's going on in my heart, I go, I don't even know where to start.

I don't even know where to start.

But God is not intimidated by this.

Other people might be, you might work really hard to keep the people around you from seeing this, you know.

But but God sees it all and he's fine with it.

He's like, there's nothing that intimidates him.

God is never gonna look at you and be like, wow.

Whew, okay.

Well, I don't really know where to start, but you whoo, oh, all right, give me a second.

Give me a second.

Like it's never gonna happen with God.

Like He sees He sees you for the way you are, He sees all of it the good, the bad, the messy, he sees it all, and He is like, Yeah, let's go.

Let's get to work.

I've got so much planned for you.

Will you trust me?

And that really is the key.

Will you trust me?

Will will you believe that what I say is true, that that my power at work within you can take this and make it into something like you can't imagine?

Do you do you really believe that my spirit at work within you can do what Ephesians 3.20 says can accomplish infinitely more than you could ever ask or imagine?

You've probably asked for or imagined some pretty good things.

How crazy is it to think that what you've asked for or imagined is not even close to what God has pictured for you?

The peace, the joy, the life, the passion for life.

Like God wants you to be passionate about your life.

And that's something that can only really happen through the power of God at work within you, but he can do it.

You don't have to do it, it's not on you, it's on him.

You get the freedom to figure it out.

Well, he does the real hard work.

But do you trust him?

Do you surrender to him?

Are you willing to open every door in your in your heart, so to speak, every aspect of your life, and just say, Jesus, Holy Spirit, do your thing.

Remodel the whole thing.

Here, here's what I've given you.

Have fun.

Like honestly.

I mean, it's like I anybody here good with cars, like you can fix your own car.

Very few hands, fewer hands every year.

We're all quitting at being mechanics.

We're like, no, no, no point.

Isn't it awesome though when something breaks down and you just take it to someone else and you're like, I don't know.

All right, call me when it's done.

You know, it's a beautiful thing.

And it's not the exact analogy with with God because it's not like you just check out.

It's more like he brings you a bye and he's like, hey, I'm gonna do it, but I want you here with me while I do it.

I'm gonna talk to you, and we're gonna have quality time together.

And while I'm fixing you up, we're gonna build our relationship.

And every once in a while I'm be like, hey, see this?

Yeah, this is this is why this is not working.

Let's do this, and this is how it should be.

It's a relationship, it's beautiful, but it requires trust because at some point you gotta hand him the keys and say it's yours.

And I realized that I just mixed in a soup metaphor and a car mechanic metaphor and a house in your heart metaphor, and it's fine because you're all smart.

But this is me.

I'm a mess, see?

Even my metaphors are messy.

But God can take the mess.

And if you're here for the next several weeks, we're gonna bit by bit kind of explore what freedom and really being free of sin and death and really living this way so that we're not as much like this as maybe we we have been before.

What that actually looks like, I want to encourage you to come.

But it all starts with trust.

And actually, we have somebody right now that's about to take a huge step of trust.

Yeah, her name's Emma, and she's about to get baptized.

And definitely cheer for her.

They're gonna make their way out in just a second.

You know, it's really funny, um, before I pray and hand it over to them, Emma and I had a really cool conversation yesterday, and it was cool for a couple of reasons.

And Emma, I think I can see you out there somewhere.

There, yeah, there's Emma.

Um, it was cool for a few reasons.

Number one, Emma's uh from Australia, and I am deeply covetous of Australian accents.

Like, I if I was, guys, if I was Australian, you would love it so much more being here.

Just be honest.

It's such a good accent.

Because if I say to you right now that God the Father wants to light a fire in your heart, like you would be like, Woo! If I said it with real passion, you know, God the Father wants to light a fire in your heart, you would like, yeah.

But if I was Australian and I said, God the Father wants to light a fire in your heart, you would be like, yeah! Woo! It's just the accent.

It's not fair.

It's not fair.

If you're a pastor with an Australian accent, you just have a giant, it's like being seven foot in basketball, it's just not fair.

So we had a great conversation because she's Australian.

But uh, but man, what she actually described was so beautiful, and it's exactly what we're talking about.

She she basically said, God has started something in me, and I don't even understand it.

And some of the people around me, they don't even understand it.

I don't understand it, but it's real, and he's changing me, and something is happening, and I can't get enough of it.

It's awesome.

And so, look, this is a part of our family, and we get so excited when people give their lives to Jesus.

So, um, with that said, I'm so excited that we get to share this with Emma.

She's gonna be baptized by uh by someone who's actually mentored her and been here for named Amber.

And so you guys can make your way out.

I'm gonna pray.

Lord, thank you so much for this church.

God, I'm so excited about today.

It's so it's so great to have this many people together, worshiping you together, learning and growing together.

And God, I can feel your spirit, I can feel the joy, I can feel the peace, and I can feel, God, the excitement of figuring it out.

We need help.

I need help figuring the whole the whole mess thing out.

I need your spirit to take the reins from my flesh every single day.

But I can't do that on my own.

So I pray over the next few weeks as we begin to explore this incredibly complicated section of scripture, that you would give us a hunger to understand the mystery, to understand the work of your spirit in our lives and what it's gonna produce.

Help us trust you.

Help us enjoy the freedom that we have to figure it out while you do the work inside of us.

We love you.

We pray all this in your name, Jesus.

Amen.