An Unlikely Instrument - Jen Timberlake

Hey, I'm Tim Timberlake, and I want to thank you so much for listening to the Celebration Church podcast.

I hope this message encouraged you, strengthened your faith, and gave you something you can carry into your week.

If you'd like to stay connected, I encourage you to join us live every Sunday at 9 a.m.

or 11 a.m.

on YouTube.

We would love to have you there.

And if you're ever in the Jacksonville, Florida area, come see us in person.

We have a seat safe for you.

Thanks again for being with us.

We're so grateful for you.

And see you next time.

So let me get into the word Acts 9, verse 15 and 16.

Acts 9:15

We find ourselves in this place today, and I'm going to give you a little reminder in a moment, but let me read the scripture and then pray.

It says, But the Lord said to him, Go, for he is a chosen instrument of mine, to carry my name before the Gentiles and kings and the children of Israel.

For I will show him how much he must suffer for the sake of my name.

So, Father God, I just thank you, Lord.

I thank you for the word that you want to speak to your people.

I thank you, Lord, for every person in this room and watching online, that there is a word for them.

Not from me, but from you.

I pray that you would use me in a mighty way.

God, that I would decrease and you would increase, that every word I speak would come from you, that those that are listening would know that you are speaking to them, that you are moving in their lives, you are transforming their hearts.

I thank you, Lord, for who you are in this place, our great High King.

God, you have all authority.

Everything is under your feet.

So no enemy, no devil, no spirit of distraction can come in this place.

We bind everything that's not from you.

And your word says what we bind on earth will be bound in heaven.

What we loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.

So I lose forgiveness.

I lose freedom.

I lose your presence.

I lose healing in this place.

In Jesus' name.

I thank you, Lord, that your word is enough.

May it be a lamp to our feet and a light to our path.

May we walk in light as people of light.

God, darkness will not prevail in this place or in our lives.

But you and you alone.

So I thank you, God, that every demon must flee.

When it sees me and hears my word, I bind it and it must flee seven ways, that your word would go forth, that your power would fall.

I don't stand here in my own strength, but in the strength of my Father.

So I thank you, God, you would steady my feet with the gospel of peace.

I pray you would give us all the mind of Christ, ready our hearts.

May we stand holding on to the sword of the Spirit and the shield of faith.

Move and speak and have your way, Lord.

I give you all glory.

You alone are enough.

In Jesus' name I pray.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

If you're taking notes today, the title of this message is An Unlikely Instrument.

And I was reminded in the first service, I was standing over by the stage, and the Lord just reminded me of how scared I used to be of speaking in front of people.

Like, I mean, scared, scared.

Like couldn't talk.

You know, when you have, I don't know if there's anyone who's ever experienced fear of public speaking, but like you're people can also see that you're scared because your whole neck and face gets red and you're like almost hyperventilating and you can't really talk, and you're like, okay.

I I used to be like that.

I used to be so scared to stand before people.

And honestly, if I was speaking about anything else other than Jesus, I might still feel that way.

But anytime I stand in front of people, I feel a boldness within my spirit because I don't stand here in my own strength.

I am an unlikely instrument.

But I need you to know if God can use me, if he can use Saul, He can use anybody.

He can use you to reach your neighbor, He can use you to reach your enemy.

And this point in Scripture where we find ourselves, it's been amazing walking through this, but I love that we finally come to the life of Paul.

And if you're new to Scripture, then Saul and Paul are the same person, okay?

Saul is a prominent persecutor of Christians.

And we find ourselves in this place.

If you haven't been with us on this journey in Acts, we find ourselves at this place where Saul was on the road to Damascus to persecute Christians, and then he encounters Jesus and he is struck blind.

And then the Lord, so he goes to this home, his friends lead him to this home, he's blind, and God just tells him, Why are you persecuting me?

And he says, Who are you, Lord?

And he says, It is I, Jesus, who you have been persecuting.

And then he says, Go and I'll tell you what to do.

But that's it.

And then he goes to this home, and then the Lord speaks to this disciple named Ananias.

And this is the first time we've seen Ananias.

We don't see him again after this, but he speaks to Ananias and he tells Ananias, go to where Saul is and lay hands on him.

And Ananias is a total stranger to Saul, but Saul is not a stranger to Ananias.

See, Ananias knows of Saul because of the persecution that Saul has led against the church.

So Ananias is kind of like, um, are we sure?

Are we sure we want to go to Saul?

You you remember, Lord, and last week Pastor Tim spoke about this.

We read in verse 13 and 14, Ananias answers the Lord when the Lord tells him to go.

He says, Lord, I have heard from many about this man how much evil he has done to your saints at Jerusalem.

And here he has authority from the chief priest to bind all who call on your name.

And then we read what the Lord says in verse 15 and 16.

The scripture says, But the Lord said to him, Go, for he is a chosen instrument of mine, to carry my name before the Gentiles and kings and the children of Israel, for I will show him how much he must suffer for the sake of my name.

See, Ananias knew Saul by his reputation, but Jesus knew him by his redemption.

And if you're taking notes, point number one is this God can see an instrument where you only see an enemy.

You see, the most unlikely individual can become one of God's greatest instruments.

What if your enemies are chosen instruments of God?

What if God tells you, see, they are a chosen instrument, and every one of you, when I just said that, had somebody that came to mind.

We all have them.

Or you're one of them.

And we've all been one of them.

And if you think you haven't, you're lying to yourself.

But what if God said go?

For they are a chosen instrument.

I don't know about you, but I can sure relate to Ananias.

I've got some people that if God told me, Go, they are a chosen instrument, I would say, are you sure they are?

Because I don't see it.

It's not on them.

Do you know what they did?

Do you know how they talked about me?

Do they know?

Do you know how they abused me?

Do you know?

My question for us today is this Will your vision come from what God says or from what you see?

Do you see people through the lens of what God sees or what you've seen in their past?

Do you even ask God what he sees in them?

It's so easy for us to write people off when they've hurt us so deeply.

But do you hear what God says?

Do you go by what he says, or do you go by what you want to say about them?

Do you poison the thoughts of others by telling them their past?

I think it's important for us to ask ourselves these questions.

Do I ask God what he sees in them?

Fill in the blank.

Them I'm using as a name.

But every one of you has a name you can put there.

Do I ask God what he sees in them?

Do I ask God how he wants to use them?

Do I ask God how I can pray for them?

Do I ask God how do you want to use me to reach them?

Does your faith or your flesh dictate your interactions with people?

Are you grace-giving to those who aren't as far along on the journey as you?

Can unsaved people tell that you're following Jesus?

Do you speak maliciously about people who don't have the same beliefs, backgrounds, upbringings, political views, or perspectives as you?

I know it can be genuinely difficult.

Like I have opinions too.

Strong ones that I keep in my home.

That's why our church looks the way it does.

Because my opinions, Pastor Tim's opinions, don't get you to the feet of Jesus.

Opinions don't invite people into a life with Jesus.

Love does.

That's a spoiler, because we don't get there until next week.

But he does.

But what we see from him, we can all relate to, we can't blame him.

Ananias was talking about what Saul had done.

But Jesus was speaking of what Saul would do.

That means both perspectives are actually correct.

But there's only one perspective that's final.

And it's not ours.

See, where Ananias saw a man chasing down Christians, God saw a man chosen by him.

Where man saw evil, God saw an instrument.

Where man saw a reputation, God saw redemption.

Where man saw an opponent, God saw a chosen vessel.

Where man saw an oppressor, God saw a carrier of the gospel.

Where man saw someone's past, God saw their future.

Be careful making permanent judgments about people God is still transforming.

Somebody can be wrong today and chosen tomorrow.

My life is a living witness of that.

I will tell you at the point God called me, I sin was so close, all I had to do was go.

And there I would have been.

A little line.

There's a line on the stage.

It's helping the point.

You can't see it though.

There it is.

I don't know why I did that.

It's fine.

I was, I was, I was so close to sin when God called me.

I thought, surely you're not talking to me.

This one?

I think you have the wrong twin.

My sister, I'm an identical twin for those that don't know or new to the church.

She's besides Pastor Tim, just my very best friend.

And part of the reason that I find myself here today, because in the midst of my suffering, she started sending me scripture and messages and worship songs that helped transform my life.

But when I knew God called me, I was like, I think you mean the other one.

Like for real.

She's she was such a good kid.

I mean, she was such a good kid.

It was so annoying.

Honestly.

It was so annoying, and it made it so easy to be a bad kid.

Because I just felt I couldn't live up to this, just she was, oh.

I mean, she just, but she was very clingy too, to my mom.

Sorry, Kim.

She was like very clingy.

So I think that's why she was such a good kid.

Because she just like, she was like just right there under my like mom's arms all the time.

And I so I was kind of more independent, which leading yourself is just not the way.

And um, I led myself honestly right on the path to hell.

And I that, yeah, that is true, just like all of us.

And there was this woman who started to speak into my life, these two ladies actually, when I gave my life to the Lord, and this woman told me, she said, and I was, I mean, I'm I'm telling you, I would just start trying to learn about what does it even look like to walk with Jesus.

And this lady, this amazing woman of God, her name was Cynthia.

She told me I was like an arrow being pulled back to be projected forward.

That I was an arrow in the hands of God and what I was walking through and struggling.

And don't get me wrong, my suffering, much of it was because of my own sin.

It was not, I had not suffered for the sake of Christ yet.

But she said, she told me I was an arrow in the hands of God, and I was being pulled back to be projected forward at a speed and a rate that I would not even be able to comprehend.

And I was like, Are you, what are you talking about?

Not me.

I don't come from church.

I never, I don't, I don't, I grew up in church as a little kid, but I had it had been a long time, and I was like, you cannot be talking about me.

And then I'll tell you, a few months later, I I got out of neurotherapy and I met my husband, and all of a sudden we got married the fifth time we saw each other in person, and I was now married to a senior pastor.

I went from literally, I wasn't even serving in the coffee shop, I was not in church.

And now I'm married to the senior pastor of a church, and it would take a couple years for me to become a pastor, but I was like, wow, she was right, and I what am I doing?

God, what are you doing?

It made no sense when she spoke that.

But you need to know this for your own life and for the in the lives of your enemies.

Point number two, God-sized assignments are often spoken before God-sized evidence ever exists.

The Lord said of Saul, for he is a chosen instrument of mine to carry my name before the Gentiles and kings and the children of Israel.

And Saul hadn't even preached a sermon.

He hadn't planted a church, he hadn't written Romans or most of the New Testament, he hadn't stood before kings, he hadn't traveled carrying the gospel across the Roman world.

At this moment, when this was spoken, Saul was blind, dependent, sitting in someone else's house, and had just been persecuting the Christian church.

Yet God called him a chosen instrument of mine.

Never confuse where you are with who God says you are.

A sinful past doesn't negate a sanctified future for you or for your enemy.

But there is a point in between the sin and sanctification that each of us make a decision.

And it's not just a decision to give your life to Jesus and accept him as your Lord and Savior.

That is the beginning of the decision.

That is not the decision.

The decision between sin and sanctification is pursuit.

It is pursuing a life with Christ.

It is seeking his face, it is walking with him.

That is the difference between suffering from sin and suffering for the sake of Christ.

There is a difference.

But you need to know no matter how you walked in here today, no matter where you're at in your life, if the Lord calls you his, you need to believe him.

If he calls you chosen, you need to believe him.

If he calls you blessed, no matter what it looks like, you need to believe him.

You are blessed.

If there is breath in your lungs, you are blessed.

I remember I've said this before, but there was a day in my life where the only thing I could be grateful for is that I could hear the birds outside and I could pick up a spoon to ease cereal.

That is all I had to be grateful for.

But do you know I had the presence of God in that moment?

I had the Lord leading me and guiding me, refining me, transforming me.

Yeah, the blessings weren't big on the outside.

Oh, but on the inside, I was blessed.

I was full.

I was overflowing.

Even if it doesn't look like it or feel like it, believe what God says.

Saul didn't appear to be an instrument of the Lord when he calls him such.

If only we would see ourselves into the eyes of God, how different would we live our lives?

Why don't you just ask him?

Just ask him what he thinks about you.

He loves you so much.

Oh my gosh, the plans and the purposes he has for you.

What he created you for is beyond anything you can comprehend.

If you would ask him, he'll tell you.

If you would start living, like you're pursuing him and only him, you would start seeing what he's actually created you to do.

It doesn't take your plan.

Okay, my five-year goals are this, my tenure goals are this, my year goal is this.

This is what I'm gonna do.

You know what it takes.

Getting in your word and letting it be a lamp to your feet and a light to your path.

And watch what God does in your life.

I'll tell you, I did not have a plan.

When they told me you are like you're seven years old, there was no plan.

The plan was survive.

That was the plan.

Survive today.

I couldn't even I would go to the grocery store.

I didn't even know how I got there.

Did I drive?

Did I walk?

It was down the street from where I was living.

Did I walk around the parking lot and then I would walk home because I couldn't find my car, and then I would realize my car wasn't at my apartment, so then I had to walk back to the store and walk around to find it.

Meanwhile, my frozen things got not frozen anymore.

It was rough.

I want you to see what the scripture says.

We love the chosen part.

We love me to carry his name to the Gentiles and to God's people, and we really love to the kings.

But Jesus attaches suffering to the assignment.

Paul's calling gave him extraordinary influence.

But it also required extraordinary endurance.

Second Corinthians gives us an incredible picture of what Paul had to endure.

In chapter 11, verse 23, I'm just gonna kind of go through it, but you can read it in your own time.

Five times Paul received at the hands of the Jews the 40 lashes, less one.

That was 39.

Three times he was beaten with rods.

One time he was stoned.

Three times he was shipwrecked.

A night and a day he was adrift at sea.

It says he was on frequent journeys, in danger from rivers, danger from robbers, danger from his own people, danger from the Gentiles, so he was in danger from everyone.

He was danger in danger in the city, in the wilderness at sea, danger from false brothers.

He was in toil and hardship through many sleepless nights.

He was in hunger and thirst.

He was often without food, in cold and exposed to the elements.

And then the scripture says, and apart from other things, which implies other persecution and suffering, he hasn't even listed here.

It says that there was the daily pressure of the anxiety he had for all of the churches.

And I believe that because he's calling all of us.

And they're like, I know that I'm just I'm gonna speak to thousands of people, but what if he calls you to speak to two?

And then suffer for the sake of Christ.

Are you only willing to suffer if he's calling you to thousands?

What if he's calling you to the one?

The scars on the instrument don't mean God stopped using it.

Sometimes it's evidence of how much the instrument's been used.

Scripture is rich with the confirmation of the reality that we will in fact suffer.

Jesus tells us so.

He says, in this life you will have trouble.

But take heart, for I have overcome the world.

I want us to take note very quickly that it doesn't say it comes upon you to tempt you.

Because the word is very clear.

God does not tempt.

The enemy tempts, but trials test.

Do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you.

But rejoice in so far as you share Christ's sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed.

It goes on and says, if you are insulted for the name of Christ, you are blessed.

Because the spirit of glory and God rests upon you.

I'm not gonna lie, I had to smile at this.

It made me want to be insulted a little more often.

And then I reminded myself that I don't look online, and I'm pretty sure I am.

I know my husband is.

My gosh, people are mean.

I have watched as his influence has risen, the persecution has become unbearable if you pay attention.

I don't.

I only find out about it when people tell me.

So, for a moment, I'd like to address those that are keyboard warriors and have so much to say about the most amazing human on the planet.

I want to let you know that he is far better off the stage than he is on the stage.

That he is the most anointed, incredible man of God I have ever met in my life.

That his character and integrity is unmatched.

I have never seen somebody hold themselves to such a standard because he walks with Christ.

He spends more time in prayer than he does anything else.

He's an amazing husband, an incredible father.

He follows and seeks after Jesus with everything he's got.

He's obedient to the point of death.

He carries his cross without complaining, and you who do not know him have the audacity to come after a man of God, and I will warn you.

And I have wanted to many times.

The things that people say about my husband.

And sometimes they're the silliest things like about his hair, and I love his hair, so back off.

And and and I get it, he has tattoos, and I am trying to tell him that that is enough, but he is not listening, and so that is okay.

We cannot speak about men and women of God so flippantly and judge them as we do.

We you do not know their life, but let me tell you, since you don't know his life, his life is above reproach.

He is incredible because he is obedient to Christ.

Who would be Paul?

I don't know if you can relate to Paul's journey.

I know for me, when I said yes to God, my greatest test of endurance, of endurance followed.

But again, please don't confuse the suffering that comes from sin and the suffering that comes for the sake of Christ, because they are different.

I had to walk through the suffering of sin to get to the suffering for the sake of Christ.

And I remember when I realized that I was suffering for Christ's sake, and I'll be honest, it was hard to rejoice.

When I got into my accident, it was while I was working, and so I have been in a workers' comp battle for 14 years.

And I remember like I went from literally not being able to tell you what two plus two was to all of a sudden somehow being in ministry.

And the only thing I had to hold on to was the hope of Jesus.

Like it was so, I I have not been able to find the words of how hard it has been to get to this point.

The physical pain and suffering I have experienced is beyond anything I could have ever imagined.

And I remember when Tim and I got married and I started to um I started to speak a little bit, but I more so I would pray and you know, exhort.

And I remember the first time that my lawyer called me, and he was like, Are you um are you leading a band?

First of all, if you'd ever heard me sing, like I make a joyful noise, it's not joyful to anyone but the Lord, and I sound good in my shower, but that's it.

And I was like, What are you talking about?

And he goes, Well, they're denying your I had to give myself shots, injections every single day for 12 and a half years.

And um it it like it helped me live.

And God miraculously healed me.

I haven't told the story, but um I mean, yes, that actually deserves a great praise.

But that's not the point of my story.

While I was giving myself these injections, um, so I was praying at church, the church we were at, and here actually, and they sent, they would send people to videotape me praying, and then they would send it to the doctors so that they could deny the very injections that kept me from being able to live.

And I remember feeling so confused that someone would use the literally the only thing that I had to hold on to the hope of Christ against me and use it to make me suffer more, as if I had not suffered enough, as if I wasn't trying to put back the pieces of my life and I could not do it without Jesus.

He did it, but I could not understand how there could be such cruelty that all I had was to grasp to Jesus and it was being used against me, and it was very hard to rejoice, and for years I struggled, for years I struggled, for years I would step on the stage fearful that somebody would be here to cause me more pain in the private battle that I was facing, and I remember having to ask God every time I would step on the stage and I still do it to protect me.

And then about a year and a half ago, I was like, you know what, Lord?

I just don't care anymore.

I actually don't care what they're going to do to me.

I don't care if it results in more suffering.

I don't care.

Like I finally settled in my spirit, God, you are above all things.

And if they will not provide for me, you will.

I don't need them.

I don't need them.

I don't need them to tell me.

They can say anything they want about me.

I know the truth.

I know how I've struggled, I know the private battles that I've faced, I know the suffering that I've endured, I know the pain that I carry.

They can they can tell me all I want that I am lying.

I don't care.

Meanwhile, they sponsored stadiums across the world.

But they can't pay$2,000 a month.

Tim and I went into debt paying for my medication.

But God provided.

He would send people.

He would send people when they when they denied it, he would send people.

One lady gave me the exact amount I needed for one week's worth of medication until my lawyer could fight in court to get me what I needed.

God will always provide for you.

He will always provide for you.

So I need you to know if I stand here boldly proclaiming the gospel, ready to be persecuted for it, if God can use me, he can use you.

It's worth it if one person would come to Christ because we are obedient to stand in our rightful place.

If one, if just one.

Would you get them saved?

Would you show them who you are?

Would you make it impossible for them to persecute me?

God, if they do, would you wake them up at night and tell them how you're using your daughter for the sake of Christ?

I need you to know the greatness of the instrument doesn't exempt it from the pain of being used.

Rather, the pain of being used often reveals the submission of the instrument.

There's a cost to following Jesus.

Make no mistake about it.

But the cost is well worth it.

That we would pillage hell and populate heaven, that we would endure, that we would suffer for the sake of Christ.

That is the gospel.

Listen to what Peter writes.

He goes on to write in uh 1 Peter chapter 5, verse 10, he says, and after you have suffered a little while, just a little while, which sometimes feels like a long time.

1 Peter 5:10

But a little while, the God of all grace who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.

After you have suffered a little while, I have watched God restore me, confirm in me what He has called me to do.

Strengthen me when I am weak.

Establish me.

I don't have to do it myself.

I have had many of times where people have told me that I should not be leading, I should not be a pastor because I am a woman.

Okay.

You're taking the scripture out of context, but it's fine.

I'm standing here with the mic, so I have stood here in toil and hardship, in pain and suffering.

And if Jesus speaks and saves one, it is worth it.

So in this moment, I want to give us an opportunity because there is a difference between your salvation and your calling to suffer for the sake of Christ.

Your calling to be an instrument to those around you.

You are a chosen generation.

You are a royal priesthood called out of darkness and into his marvelous light, that you yourself would be a light to the world, a city set on a hill.

You are the salt of the earth and the light to the world.

You are called to reflect the light of Christ to those around you, not just the people you like, but to your enemies, to those who have hurt you, to those who have persecuted you.

And I know I'm in a room full of people who know it.

But would you, if you are willing and if you are able, and if you yourself have made up in your mind, I will reflect Christ to my enemies, I will forgive those who have hurt me, I will forgive those who have persecuted me, I will be a chosen instrument used by God.

No matter what I think, no matter how I feel, no matter how I see things, I will decide right now in this moment.

I am going to reflect Christ in the earth.

Would you just stand so I can pray for you?

If I can suffer, you can suffer.

Because God is no respecter of person, He will use you in a mighty way.

Thank God I'm in a room full of believers, a room full of people pursuing Christ that are willing to lay down their lives, lay down their flesh to take up the call of faith, the call of Christ.

So, Father God, I thank you, Lord, for these people.

I thank you for those in the room and watching online, God, that have made a decision that we will suffer for the sake of Christ, that we will leave our sin behind, that we will pursue righteousness for your name's sake, that we will reflect you to the earth.

God, that we will reach out and touch our enemies, that we will be used, that we will pray for those who persecute us.

Those that are yet to know you, Jesus.

You want to use us to reach them.

So we say yes, we agree.

Thank you for a united body pursuing you, seeking you, being willing to be used by you, Lord.

I plead the blood of Jesus over every son and every daughter that you would strengthen them when they feel weak, be their strength, God.

When they are weary, God, speak to them.

God, give them the mind of Christ today, transform them.

Lord, I pray that the enemy would not sift this word, but it would take deep root in their hearts, that they would know they are a chosen instrument of the Most High God, and you are sending them to every single place on the earth, to this city, to this state, to this nation, to the world, to their neighborhoods, to their schools, to their community, to their teams, to their jobs, to their neighbors, to their friends, and to their foes, God, that you are sending them to lay their hands on the sick and they will recover, to speak liberty to the captives and the opening of prisons to those who are bound.

You are calling your people higher.

Would you prepare us for such a high call?

Strengthen us when we suffer for your sake, Lord, and may we rejoice at the persecution that would follow, knowing that we carry the spirit and glory of the living God.

It is in Jesus' mighty name that we pray.

If you're in agreement, would you just say amen with me?

Amen.

Amen.