Genesis 33 (Enough is Enough) - Pastor Bruce Mejia

We are in Genesis chapter 33.

Genesis 33 · chapter mention

If you remember from last week in Genesis 32,

you have Jacob, of course, wrestling with the angel,

which is a pre-incarnate Christ.

And God is working on Jacob at this point

because of the fact that he's going back to confront

or to meet his brother, Esau.

And obviously he's afraid of what's gonna happen

when he meets his brother.

His brother had threatened him 20 years before

that he was gonna kill him.

And Jacob obviously understands that

to a certain degree on a practical level,

he kind of deserves this, right?

He was a very cunning person.

He was very deceptive.

And earlier in Genesis 32,

the servants of Jacob had reported

that they had seen Esau

and that Esau was coming with 400 men.

So the idea here that Jacob has in his mind

is that Esau is coming to make war with him.

He's gonna come fight him.

He's gonna fulfill that which he said he's gonna do

20 years prior to this.

And you know, God is working on Esau.

We have him being left alone in chapter 32.

And of course he wrestles with the Lord

and he does not let him go until he gets blessed by God, right?

And this is essentially where we have Jacob

being renamed Israel.

And both of these names are significant to him

because it kind of pictures his old man

and the new man, right?

Jacob is characterized by being a liar,

being deceptive, a heel catcher.

That's basically like the old man.

But when he wrestles with the Lord,

he ends up being renamed Israel

as a prince he has power with God and with men.

This is essentially the picture of that new man.

So now he has essentially from a spiritual perspective,

these two natures.

And from here on out, we'll kind of see him go back

and forth between these two natures.

So even though he has this new name,

he has this quote unquote new nature,

he still has a tendency to revert back

to the old Jacob as well.

You know what, that's an important principle

because we as Christians, if we're saved,

we have a new nature, amen.

We have that new name written in glory.

It's embedded within the registry of the book of life.

We have the Holy Spirit of God,

but we have that new man.

But it's not at the exclusion of the old.

We still have Jacob dwelling within us, so to speak.

Meaning that we are still susceptible

to the weaknesses of our old man.

And if we feed Jacob and we've given

to the desires of that old man,

we're gonna fulfill the desires of the luster of,

we're gonna be weak Christians.

And so just because God gave us a new nature,

doesn't mean that we don't have the propensity

to give in to the old as we see clearly with Jacob.

When he's wrestling with him,

he ends up touching the hollow of his thigh,

causing him to have somewhat of a limp

for the rest of his life, okay?

So he injures him and it's an indication

that he's met with God,

that he's been broken, so to speak.

And it's that which has caused him to become humbled.

And it's for that reason that he's no longer prideful, right?

He doesn't have that same arrogancey,

pride, deceptive nature about himself

when he's gonna go meet his brother Esau.

Now look at chapter 33 and verse one.

It says,

Now, this is pretty messed up and, you know, obviously,

we gotta address this because, you know,

Jacob, though he cares for his family,

there's obviously certain people

that he favors a little more than others.

So what's going on here?

Well, he knows he's about to confront Esau.

He knows there's potential for war.

He knows that Esau 20 years prior to this wants him to die.

So what does he do?

Well, on a practical level, we saw in chapter 32

that he prayed unto the Lord.

He has faith in God that God's gonna deliver him,

but then he still has somewhat some doubt in him, right?

And so what he ends up doing is he puts the people

that he doesn't care as much for at the front, okay?

You know, he has all these wives and all these kids

and we know that he favors Rachel over everyone else, okay?

He loves Rachel more than Leah.

And of course, he loves them more than the handmaids.

So what does he do?

He puts the handmaids first, okay?

He puts the handmaids first, then he puts Leah

and then you have him and Rachel and their children.

So this is kind of showing us that Jacob

still has not changed in that manner.

He's not, you know, the hollow of his thigh being

shrunken hasn't really changed his perspective

on his wives, okay?

He's not like, well, you know, now I'm Israel.

I'm just gonna treat everyone equally.

No, he still has favoritism.

And it's kind of messed up because if he really thinks

that Esau's gonna come kill him, in his mind,

he's like, well, let them take the handmaids first.

And once he gets through the handmaids,

let them take Leah after that.

And then after he takes Leah, let them take,

you know, Rachel and me thereafter,

but at least they spare Leah, you know,

at least he gets to the handmaids

and Leah before they actually get to Rachel.

And so this is obviously demonstrating here

that though Jacob is a new man, so to speak,

he still has that cowardice nature about himself

where he's showing favoritism.

Now, again, this kind of flies in the face of

the fact that people think that polygamy is okay today,

right?

Oh man, oh, it's wonderful.

This is God's order.

This is how God wants it.

Oh yeah, let's go ahead and ask Leah about that.

You know, let's go ahead and ask the handmaids

about that, how they felt about being second class citizens,

being, you know, Jacob willing to sacrifice them first

before they got to Rachel.

Obviously that does not work and that's not God's will,

but Jacob is somewhat, he's fearful

and so he's not willing to lose that,

which is most precious to him.

And obviously the principle that we can learn there

is that that which we highly esteem

is what we keep close to us, right?

Rachel is highly esteemed in the eyes of Jacob,

therefore he keeps Rachel close to him,

whereas Leah and the handmaids,

he's kind of got them on the outskirts.

And you know what, the biblical principle there

is that we need to make sure that, you know,

when we're going into spiritual battle, so to speak,

against an adversary, we need to keep that

which is most important close to us.

What do I mean by that?

Well, you know, when you're going through

a spiritual battle, when you're confronted

with an adversary, some sort of spiritual warfare,

you need to make sure that you keep the Bible

nice and close to you, right?

In close proximity.

Your church attendance needs to stay

in close proximity to you.

Your prayer life needs to stay in close proximity to you.

And you know what?

The other stuff can go on the back burner.

You know, I'm sorry that we're using Leah

and the handmaids as an illustration

of that which is lightly esteemed,

but that's basically the principle there, right?

Obviously what you care about less

goes on the outskirts

because you're willing to sacrifice those things,

but that which you care about the most

needs to remain nice and close to you.

Look at verse number four.

It says, an Esau ran.

Now, considering how fearful Jacob is,

I'm sure that scared him, right?

He ran to meet him and embraced him

and fell on his neck and kissed him

and they wept.

So keep in mind, Jacob has this idea

that Esau wants to kill him.

Esau comes with four under men,

but instead of spearing him,

killing him, stabbing him, going to war with him,

he actually runs up to him and embraces him,

he kisses him, he's happy to see him.

Now, what does this tell us?

What does this teach us?

What can we learn from this particular encounter?

Well, it shows us that sometimes

we have a tendency to overreact, okay?

Sometimes people don't wanna reconcile relationships.

Sometimes they don't wanna confront a situation

because they really think it's gonna turn out really bad,

right?

And I think all of us to a certain degree

have experienced something like this

where we're like, well, you know,

I don't wanna talk to this person

or I don't want to try to reconcile with my family member

or I don't wanna talk this situation out

because of all the possible outcomes

that can stem from this, right?

And quite frankly, our imagination

can run absolutely wild with us

where we think to ourselves, well,

if I put myself in a vulnerable situation like this

where I'm talking to this person,

this is how it's gonna end up.

You know, they're gonna get mad.

They're gonna say all kinds of things.

They're gonna get me upset

and it's gonna end up being worse.

But often, you're just kind of overreacting, right?

You're kind of just allowing your fears

to conjure up a situation or an outcome

that's not really realistic.

It's not really gonna happen.

You think like your greatest fears

are gonna come upon you,

but then what happens

when you actually try to reconcile this situation?

What happens?

Esau actually ends up embracing you,

kissing you, ends up being good.

And I'm sure Jacob felt relieved.

He's thinking the worst possible case scenario.

He's trying to soften the blow by sending gifts

and then he gets to that point and he's just like,

man, this is not as bad as what I thought it was gonna be.

And you know what?

When it comes to the subject of reconciliation

because that's really what we're looking at here, right?

The reconciliation between two brothers

who are at odds against one another.

They're adversaries.

One is threatening the other 20 years prior.

The other one is running for his life.

I mean, he's literally in a foreign land for 20 years

because he's afraid that his brother's gonna kill him.

What we have here is what exactly what we should do

and not allow our imaginations to just cause us

to make a bad decision

or to avoid confrontation or reconciliation, right?

We need to make sure that we don't just allow

our imagination to cause us to think,

well, I know exactly how this is gonna turn out.

Therefore I'm just gonna avoid it.

I know what they're gonna say.

This is what's gonna happen.

And that's not even the case.

What if Jacob just decided not to do this?

What if he just said, well,

no, I know my brother you saw.

Bro's a hairy man.

He's extremely angry.

He's upset.

He's bitter.

Last time I saw him, he said he was gonna kill me.

So we're just gonna go a different route.

I'm gonna avoid him altogether.

Well, he wouldn't have reconciled with his brother

and had this wonderful encounter with him, right?

And so we as Christians, we're called,

and I've mentioned this already in Times Pass,

but we're called to reconciliation.

We're called to reconcile with others

if there's ought between us, okay?

And you can't allow what you think the outcome is gonna be

that imagination that you're conjuring up

to hinder you from actually confronting that person

and getting it right, okay?

And let's just say, for example,

that the worst possible case scenario

actually does take place.

You're still called to try to reconcile, though.

You're still called to do so.

And look, Christians have a tendency

to just come up with an entire storyline

of what can possibly happen if I go talk to this person

and they're just, you know, they got the storyboard,

every single word that's gonna be said

and this is what's gonna happen

and therefore I'm not gonna go talk to this person.

You know what that is?

It's often just Satan.

Just trying to whisper in your ear,

trying to hinder you from being at peace

amongst each other and being reconciled

using your imagination.

I mean, it reminds me of David, right?

You know, obviously David is running from Saul.

He saw us threatening to kill him

and on multiple occasions, Saul said like,

hey, I'm not gonna pursue you,

but then he ends up pursuing it.

And then finally at the end,

Saul just comes to his senses and says, you know what?

I'm not gonna pursue you.

You have spared my life

and therefore I'm not gonna try to kill you.

And then David's like, all right, cool.

But then in his mind,

the Bible says that David said in his heart,

I shall one day die by the hand of Saul.

You know what he does?

He ends up going to live in the land of the Philistines

for over a year based upon that imagination.

Wasn't true though.

Saul was done pursuing David.

Obviously he didn't have a good track record

in that regard, but that one little thought,

that one little judgment that he made caused him

to go into a foreign land.

I mean, literally the enemy's camp for an entire year,

just because he said in where his heart,

I shall one day die by the hand of Saul.

You know what?

We need to make sure that, yeah,

obviously we need to plan ahead.

Obviously we need to be prudent.

Obviously we need to think about the worst case scenario,

but don't allow that to hinder you

from actually carrying out the reconciliation, okay?

And you know, we live in a day and age

where a lot of people are just like anxiety driven.

They're just very anxious about everything.

Super nervous, they're anxious.

They just have like these mental breakdowns

where they're just afraid of what's gonna happen.

And often that's due to just imaginations.

Things that are just not really gonna happen.

Just not, it comes as a result

of not casting down imaginations

and every guy I think that exalted himself

against the knowledge of God.

Oh, I just can't do it, because what if this happens?

But you don't know if that's gonna happen.

You have no idea what's gonna take place.

All you know is that you should go

and reconcile with your brother or sister in Christ,

make it right.

No, but they're gonna think this of me.

You don't know that.

No, but they're gonna yell at me.

You don't know that.

No, but this is what's gonna happen.

You don't know that.

But let me say this.

If you're the type of person that is overly anxious

over these confrontations and reconciliations,

let me just give you a tip that'll help you

to just overcome that, okay?

And it's very uncomfortable, okay?

It's not, it doesn't make the situation easier.

It just makes it a lot easier going forward

with reconciliations in the future.

So let's say you have to reconcile with someone

and you're just like, I'm just scared.

Like I'm afraid of what's gonna happen if I do.

Well, this is what you do.

You think of the absolute worst possible case scenario.

Okay?

Let's just say brother Marcos, you know,

he's at war with, let's just pick someone here.

Who's easy to pick on right here?

Who?

Hi, that's too easy though.

That's too easy.

That's too close to the truth.

Let's say Adam, because he just walked in, all right?

So Marcos is at enmity with Adam

and Marcos has this social anxiety about himself

and he does, he has to like reconcile with Adam

but he's just afraid of what Adam's gonna say.

He's afraid of what he's gonna do.

Adam is a high-tempered fellow.

He's not, but we're just imagining here.

You know, he's a high-tempered fellow.

He's extremely angry.

He has a short fuse.

And so Marcos knows his responsibility to reconcile

but he's just like, I just don't want you

because I don't know what's gonna happen.

Well, what do you think is the worst possible case scenario

that can happen for the Marcos?

I just feel as if it's gonna punch me in the mouth.

And it's like, Adam, you know.

You know, he's just like, you think is it?

Yeah, I really think based upon my offense

that he's just gonna punch me in the throat.

Okay?

And this is all in illustration, can never happen, okay?

It's not gonna happen between these guys.

These guys get along great.

So what should Marcos do?

So he's just avoided it altogether?

No, what he has to do is just make peace with that.

The possibility that Adam can just sock him in the throat.

Okay?

And I'm not kidding you, this literally helps.

So Marcos has to say, you know what?

The worst possible thing that can happen

is that he chops me in my throat.

And then what you do is you make peace with that

and say, you know what?

I'm expecting that.

If that's the case, I've already made peace with it.

Put it in God's hands and whatever happens,

I'm in God's hands.

I just know what I'm doing is right.

This is the worst possible case scenario.

And I would say 90% of the time,

Adam ends up not chopping him in the throat.

And you know what that does?

It causes the person who is putting the effort

into reconciling, to have faith

in reconciling future relationships,

because it causes them to have doubt

in their own judgment for the future.

They're just like, whoa, I actually overreacted.

Like, that was just an imagined,

nothing was even close to that.

In fact, Adam was even mad.

In fact, Adam forgot about the offense.

In fact, Adam doesn't even remember

when he said that, you know,

when Marco said that to him or whatever maybe.

And so then you start deconstructing

all of these narratives that your mind

is coming up with against your adversary.

And then you realize like, man,

like I overreacted in my mind.

So folks, if you are forced to reconcile a situation,

a relationship with a friend, family member,

whoever, just think of the worst possible case scenario

and make peace with it.

You're like, yeah, but what if it does happen though?

What if Adam does chop him in the throat?

Well, at least you called it.

At least you called it.

And now you know, like, okay, I kind of,

and it will soften the blow, no pun intended.

Because then you're like, well, I kind of expected that.

That's what I thought was gonna happen.

You know, it wasn't even that bad.

Adam didn't even chop me that hard, you know?

You know, it's okay.

And now we're friends now,

because we talked it out or whatever.

But I'm just gonna tell you right now,

90% of the time, the worst possible case scenario

that you can think of, most of the time does not happen.

And it ends up helping you to, you know,

essentially reconcile future relationships

because if you're not the reconciling type,

you're gonna always have problems

throughout your life with other people.

Because you're always avoiding reconciliation.

You're always avoiding, you know,

reconciling with others and confronting others.

Now, let me also say this is that

there needs to be a balance to this as well, right?

Meaning that we don't need to confront each other

for every single little thing

that we say against each other, you understand?

Like, you know, I don't want Adam confronted me afterwards

and say, hey, I didn't really appreciate you

using me as an illustration.

You know, I kind of didn't like that.

I'm just gonna ignore him.

I'm just gonna walk away, okay?

Because that's not an offensive thing.

You know, obviously I'm referring to like

grievous offenses where it's really

affecting a relationship.

It's really affecting you, you know,

where maybe money's involved or something like that, right?

Some sort of situation that's really affecting

both parties spiritually,

or there's just a really grievous offense

that is just very blatant

that maybe even someone can potentially

get thrown out for of the church.

The point that I'm making here

is that we need to make sure

that we develop the discipline

of learning how to talk things out when necessary.

You know, it begins in the home.

I mean, this is literally Jacob and Esau,

brothers, twin brothers at that.

Twin brothers, amen, we got it, you know?

Twin brothers, you know, he's not even,

he's cool with his brother, you know?

But these are literally twin brothers.

These are family members having to reconcile.

And you know what?

It'll help you to learn how to reconcile situations

in church when you do it at home first.

It'll help you to learn how to reconcile situations

when you know how to reconcile with your spouse.

And let me say this, you know,

when you're married, you will have instances

where there will be conflict between you and your wife.

You're gonna be like Esau and she's gonna be like Jacob.

Or you're gonna be like Jacob

and she's gonna be like Esau.

You know, where there's like conflict.

That's not a crazy thing to say.

That's literally reality, my friends.

And you know what?

I'll be honest with you, to be transparent with you,

I grew up in a home where reconciliation

wasn't really a thing.

You don't really reconcile.

That's not even a word.

Like in our growing up, it just wasn't a thing.

If there was some sort of conflict with, you know,

my siblings or my parents or whatever,

we just wouldn't talk about it.

It would just, we'd fight and then, you know,

you just kind of waited out a couple of days.

You guys know what I'm talking about?

You know, you just waited out a couple of days

and then, you know, if they made you a meal or something,

that was like their peace offering.

Like a week later, it was just like, come eat.

It was just like, all right, I think we're cool now, you know?

Same thing with my brother.

You know, I remember like, for example, my brother,

when we would have fights,

because we would fight all the time,

it was just common for us to fight.

And he was like, he's 13 years older than me.

But like, we would fight a lot.

Sometimes physically fight, sometimes verbally.

And, you know, I remember there'd be instances where like,

we just wouldn't talk for days.

Just, and we lived in the same house.

We'd see each other and just absolutely avoid each other.

Now, if you're like, whoa, that's crazy,

is that, that's a real thing.

Okay, and I'm sure a lot of you know

what I'm talking about.

We would literally avoid each other.

And the only time I knew that we were cool,

because my brother used to love drawing,

is that he would draw me something.

And then he would leave it on the table.

He would even be there.

He'd just leave it on the table

and they would say like four bars or something.

And I get there, I'm like, okay, cool,

Melvin's cool with me again, you know?

Like, we're cool, you know?

And then we'd see each other and everything would be good.

And you're like, oh, that's so nice.

No, not really.

The tension, the conflict,

the uncomfortable feeling of just being at odds

against someone, that's not a good thing.

But you know, that's what happens

when you don't really grow up in a Christian home

around Christian principles.

Whereas, you know, the Bible teaches us

to just reconcile it, okay?

And so, you know, learn how to be

a reconciling type of a Christian at home.

Start with your marriage, you know?

I've had conflicts with my wife.

Yes, we don't have a perfect marriage, you know?

I've had instances where, you know,

we argue and we don't get along for whatever reason.

You know, maybe we're not sleeping enough

and we're just both cranky

and we're both acting a little bratty.

And you know what?

There's conflict, okay?

We're not swinging at each other or anything like that,

you know, because she would just lose.

She's just, that's super easy, you know?

But you know, there's times when we would just like

have a lot of conflict and you know what?

Sometimes it's just you're married

for a certain amount of time

and you know, you have personality conflicts.

There's things that you don't agree upon

and then you're both snappy at each other.

That's literally what's happened in my marriage.

I've had that happen multiple times.

In fact, we had one this week.

Yeah, that's why she's not in church.

She's just mad at me right now.

I'm just kidding.

My daughter's sick right now.

We've literally had time.

That's why she's not over there, you know?

She's being a rebellious woman, I'm just kidding.

We, even this week, we had a conflict, you know?

You know, what'd you do?

We just, you know, we just apologized

to each other, what we do, you know?

I'm like, you know, do you have something

you want to tell me?

You know?

Because you know, here's the thing folks,

is that life is filled with conflict

and it's just not worth having conflict at home

because we have it everywhere else.

You just have it everywhere else.

You want your home to be peaceful.

Well, then you have to participate in reconciliation.

And I have this conviction

that you don't let the sun go down upon your wrath.

Because it sucks.

And look, I'll be the first one to tell you

that I've done that, okay?

I'm telling you this because I want you to understand

that like, you know, your pastor's not perfect.

Yeah, you know, I have an awesome marriage, a great marriage.

And then I know when I share these illustrations with you,

you're like, Ms. Sarah, she really?

I can't even picture that.

Yeah, you know, she's a sinner like everyone else.

And you'll never catch us fighting in public

or anything like that, you know what I mean?

Because I'll just give her the eye.

You know, we're not gonna yell at each other

in public or anything, but we've had conflicts for sure.

But you know, we live by the principle

of we need to reconcile this

and I'm sorry.

Like, even this morning, this morning,

I text my wife over something and I just told her,

hey, I just wanna apologize to you for X, Y, and Z.

I'm really sorry.

And you know, I've shouldn't have said that

and so please forgive me.

And she doesn't leave me on red, okay?

Or put some bubbles and then go back, you know?

You know what I mean?

She's just like, well, let them grovel.

Let them grovel a little bit, you know?

You know what I'm talking about?

Where you text someone and then they're typing

and then it goes away

and then the bubbles come back and it goes away.

Just like, just say it!

My phone died, you know?

And she forgives me right away.

You know what?

I do the same.

Because you know, I married a sinner and so does she.

And so we're always gonna have conflict.

But here's the thing is that, you know,

if we didn't practice reconciliation,

my imagination can run wild.

You know, my imagination can be like, oh man,

my wife is becoming a rebellious feminist!

She's a feminist.

She's a, you know,

and then just come up with all kinds of crazy,

you know, and I'm sure she can come up

with all kinds of crazy imaginations too.

So to avoid all that nonsense, just go talk to Esau.

Think of the worst possible case scenario

that can come about this whole situation and you know what?

And I personally think one of the reasons

why we're so quick to just squash,

you know, whatever conflict we have,

I'm talking about my wife and I,

it's because we have experience in reconciliating,

or reconciling one with another.

She has experience with me forgiving her

and I have experience with her forgiving me.

And so it just makes reconciliation that much more sweeter.

Understand?

But you know, people who don't like to reconcile

or they just leave things on the table

for a long period of time,

they have a hard time reconciling

because of the fact that

they've never really put it into practice.

And you know, we can't blame ourselves per se

or anybody else if that's how we were

because if it wasn't modeled to us,

then it's hard to do those things, right?

So we have to take what the Bible says

and just put it into practice.

Like where does it say?

Well, we're looking at a story right now.

Jacob literally going as cowardice as he is,

as cunning as he is,

he's just like, you know what?

Talking to him, my brother Esau

is a lot better than staying with Laban at least.

And we just have to do this.

And it ended up being great.

He won his brother over, you know,

his brother was excited to meet him.

It was great.

You know, practice in your marriage.

Make sure you practice with your kids.

And kids, you need to make sure

you practice this with your parents.

If you're resentful towards mom and dad

because of some offense

or because you feel like you've done something

and you're like, man,

I don't wanna go tell my mom and dad this

because they might be even more mad.

You'd be surprised.

You'd be surprised if you go talk to Esau

that it's not that way.

And in fact, you know what mom and dad are gonna do?

They're gonna run up to you, embrace you and kiss you

just like Esau did.

And you know what, children?

Let me just tell you this.

Is that Satan is gonna work overtime

throughout these years

while you're under your parents' roof

to try to convince you

that going to mom and dad

and talking to them about these things

is just not the best idea.

Oh man, if you go talk to mom and dad

they're gonna be so mad.

They're gonna spank you.

They're gonna do this.

They're gonna do that.

And then you just, you have all these

and you're like, oh, I'm just gonna not say anything.

I'm gonna just keep this from mom and dad.

I'm just gonna lie to them.

And then you end up making the situation a lot worse.

Whereas if you actually put into practice,

let me just go reconcile with mom and dad.

Let me just go tell them the truth.

Explain to them what happened.

You know what's gonna happen?

They're gonna have mercy on you.

Yeah, they may be a little upset.

But let me tell you this.

If you are humbly going to them

and confessing whatever fault you have,

whatever sin you committed,

whatever offense you did,

the punishment is a lot less.

And in fact, in many cases there's no punishment at all.

Not 100% of the time,

but you know a large percent of the time

there's no punishment because parents appreciate,

listen to me, parents appreciate

when you just come clean.

Understand?

Hey kids, learn how to reconcile with your parents.

Learn how to apologize to mom and dad.

Learn how to just say, I'm sorry, mom.

I'm sorry, dad.

I did this and I was wrong.

And you know what?

Mom and dad will appreciate it.

And you know what they're gonna do?

They're gonna be like Esau.

They're gonna run to you.

They're gonna embrace you.

They're gonna kiss you.

And then all those imaginations just melt away.

You're like, wow, it wasn't as bad

as I thought it was gonna be.

And let me just tell you this.

One of the most satisfying things to feel

when you reconcile with someone

is this imaginary burden that comes off of you.

You guys know what I'm talking about?

Like when you reconcile with someone

and then it's all good,

it's just like, man, I feel like,

I feel like a load has been taken off.

You know what that's called?

You're not guilty anymore.

You've been forgiven, right?

And often that load is loaded with,

along with your offense,

all the imaginations of the conclusions

that can come about if you were to reconcile.

So you're just loading that bag, loading that backpack.

But you know what happens when you go reconcile,

you take the backpack off

and it's not as bad as you thought it was gonna be.

Learn how to reconcile with your spouse.

Learn how to reconcile with your children.

Learn how to reconcile with mom and dad.

Hey, learn how to reconcile with other church members as well.

And I know I talked about this,

I don't know, a couple of weeks ago,

but the chapter's talking about it,

so I'm here to talk about it too.

You know, if there's beef with you

and another church member,

don't be this person who just avoids

the conflict altogether

when you know that there's just

some sort of glaring offense

or you're just feeling guilty about something,

go get it right.

Go get it right.

If you've offended someone,

if you are just grievously,

you know, if you've just grievously offended someone,

go get that right and just go apologize to them.

Just go get it right.

This is a church.

This is what we do.

These are Christians.

This is how we're supposed to operate.

And you're like, yeah, but I just feel like,

I feel like the relationship's just beyond recognition.

No, it's not.

It's not beyond recognition.

You're just allowing your imaginations

to get the best of you is what you're doing.

Okay?

You need to learn the discipline.

And look, as far as I know,

everyone here, I could be wrong.

Everyone here wants to stay at this church

for the rest of their lives.

Okay?

You know, as far as I know.

So that means that you're gonna have to see these people

for the rest of your lives.

Okay?

So you better learn how to reconcile them.

Because if you're just gonna see them every service,

this is your church family,

it's not worth carrying this burden of guilt,

carrying this burden of bitterness,

carrying this burden of resentment.

Just go get it right.

Go get it right.

Go talk to Adam.

Go talk to Marcos.

Just go talk to them.

Adam's gone.

I don't even know where he got offended at the illustration.

I gotta go get that right with him later on.

What's the worst that can happen, you know?

Go talk to Esau.

And I'm just telling you right now,

and look, you say, well, I'm the type

that I like to reconcile things immediately,

but it seems as though the people around me

don't like to do so.

Well, just give them some space for a little bit, you know?

I'll tell you this, you know, if I'm really upset,

I'm not really necessarily ready to reconcile

just at the drop of a hat.

I kinda wanna be pissed off for a little bit.

You know what I mean?

Like, the anger needs to run its course.

Okay?

You know what I'm saying?

Sometimes it's just like,

I just wanna be mad for a little bit.

I just wanna be upset for a while, okay?

And often that's necessary.

Let me explain to you why it's necessary for me,

because if I'm angry about something,

and I'm super mad about something,

because I do get mad about things.

My flesh, I have a temper, I can become wrathful,

that's just my weakness.

If I'm angry about something,

I wanna let it run its course,

so then I come to my senses.

Because then there's a cooling period, right?

There's a cooling period,

and then it's just like, man, I've overreacted.

I need to stop being such a bitter person.

I need to stop being such an angry individual

and just go talk to this person,

go talk to my wife, go talk to whatever,

and just go get it right, you know?

And look, there's been instances

where I felt like I offended someone in our church,

and you know, Monday mornings are just like,

I feel like an 18-wheeler hit me,

and so I'm just like, man,

and then I'm carrying these,

like I remember, I don't know,

it was like a couple months ago or something,

I felt like I offended someone,

and it was just bothering me,

like Sunday night I went home,

and it was just on my mind.

And I'm not thinking of stuff like,

man, this is really bothering me.

And there's part of me that's just like,

maybe I shouldn't say anything

because maybe it's just my imagination,

but then it's just like, if I keep thinking about it,

I need to just clear myself of this.

So then the next morning, I text this person,

I said, hey, I wanna let you know,

I just wanna apologize to you

for X, Y, and Z wasn't my place,

I'm really sorry about this,

and they're like, no, it's really cool, thank you,

I appreciate it.

And that was it.

And you say, well, how was your

Monday morning after that?

It was great.

I was just like, well, I moved on from that.

You see, I'm not above being someone

who offends someone as well,

like it happens to me too.

Sometimes I feel like I offend someone,

now obviously I'm not gonna apologize

for anything I say behind the pulpit.

If I offend you behind here,

you take that up with God, okay?

I don't really care if you're offended

of whatever I say behind the pulpit,

how specific I get, or what kind of sin I call out.

If you take it personally, then you take it good,

I'm glad you did.

I'm talking about things that maybe we talk about

on a one-on-one,

or maybe I feel like I go too far on something,

I take a joke too far or something

because I have a tendency of doing that.

If I say something, and then later I'm thinking,

I'm like, you know what?

I probably shouldn't have said that.

I was wrong of me to do, and I need to go,

but what if I just allow my imaginations to run wild

and just think to myself, nah, I can't do that

because they're gonna lose respect for me if I do that?

What are they gonna think of me as the pastor

telling them that I was wrong about this?

That's a stupid thought.

And people might think like, oh man,

yeah that's the reason I don't go and talk to people

is because I feel like they're gonna lose respect for me.

No, they're probably gonna get more respect for you

because you're willing to humble yourself

and go talk to them, okay?

And so, you know, we need to endeavor

to keep the spirit of unity in the bond of peace.

What does it mean to endeavor?

That means you gotta put in all this effort.

God expects for us to be in unity.

He wants us to be tightly knit together,

to be of one mind, but that doesn't happen on accident.

You have to endeavor to do so, okay?

Meaning you ask for forgiveness,

but you're also willing to forgive

when people ask you to forgive them.

Make sure you do that.

And don't run away from problems in our church.

Don't run away from these conflicts.

Don't run away from it.

Don't just avoid it.

Just deal with it and be done with it.

And then you'll realize when you meet Esau,

man, I guess it wasn't even that bad.

Esau was actually happy to see me.

Goes on to say in verse five,

and he lifted up his eyes

and saw the women and the children

and said, who are those with thee?

And he said, the children which God

hath graciously given thy servant.

So we see a hint of humility in the voice of Jacob

because when he's deceiving his father, Isaac,

he's like, oh, where did you get this so fast?

He's like, the Lord provided it.

It's just like you're lying, right?

But this time he's actually being very humble

and he's giving God credit for the family,

the children, the possessions that he has.

Verse six says, then the handmaidens came near,

they and their children, and they bowed themselves.

And Leah also with her children came near

and bowed themselves.

And after came Joseph near and Rachel

and they bowed themselves.

And he said, what meanest thou by all this drove

which I met?

And he said, these are to find grace

in the sight of my Lord.

So it was essentially a sign of humility.

He's just like, it's kind of like forgive us.

Forgive me, these are my wives.

These are my children.

We're all kind of just like your humble servants.

And obviously Esau is humbled at this.

It says in verse, our first number nine.

And Esau said, I have enough, my brother.

Keep that thou hast unto thyself.

Now I love this statement here that's made by Esau

because not only is Jacob coming with humility

with his wives and his children,

he's bringing gifts, possessions.

Because Jacob is a very wealthy person.

He has a lot of possessions.

He's accumulated a lot of wealth

and he wants to distribute that.

He wants to give that to his brother Esau

as a peace offering, so to speak.

But what does Esau say?

He's like, I have enough.

I have enough.

Now there's a couple of things

that we can learn from this.

Number one is that Esau has been blessed by God too.

Because keep in mind,

he didn't get the Abrahamic blessing

but he still was blessed of the Lord, right?

He was not blessed to be a part of the lineage

but that's okay.

He was still blessed of God.

And you know what he says?

I have enough.

Now another thing that we can learn from this

is that you know what?

You may not be blessed like someone else is blessed

but you're blessed though, right?

You may think to yourself,

well I don't have what this person has.

I don't have the type of marriage this person has.

The children these people have.

I don't have the possessions,

the wealth or whatever.

Yeah, but you are blessed though

and the attitude that you should have is,

I have enough.

Be content, right?

Because Esau's not bitter.

He's not upset.

You would think that he would be but he's not.

Yeah, he saw it carefully with tears

when it initially happened

and he found no place of repentance

but obviously not only has God been working on Jacob,

he's also been working on Esau as well.

To the point where 20 years later Esau comes

and he says, I have enough.

You don't have to give me anything.

I have been blessed of the Lord.

I have sufficient.

What does this tell us?

It tells us that godliness with contentment is great gain.

I have enough.

And what I've learned from my personal life

and the lives of other successful Christians,

other pastors, other church members

is people who feel like they've had enough

are often given more.

They're often blessed with more

because they feel like I got enough.

I have everything to fulfill my needs.

I have everything that I need.

Like God has provided for me in a substantial way.

I have nothing to complain about.

You know what God ends up doing?

He ends up giving you more

because he's not gonna give you more

if you're a greedy, covetous person.

And you know what?

Esau's not a covetous person.

He's not a greedy individual.

He's not a lustful individual in this regard.

He's a person who feels like he has enough.

And you know what?

We all, as God's people, need to learn

to say I have enough.

God's blessed me enough.

I have everything that I need.

And you think to yourself,

well, you know, I feel like I don't have enough.

Well, you know what?

You need to sing that song,

count your blessings, name them one by one, amen.

Count your blessings, see what God has done.

Because you know what?

I've not seen the righteous

forsaken nor seed-begging bread.

I know that when God is blessing an individual,

you say, well, I feel like God's not blessing me.

I don't have the financial means.

Well, you know, then you need to take inventory

of your spiritual life then.

First of all, is there sin in your life?

If there's some glaring sin,

then obviously that's probably the reason why

your needs are not being provided for

because of the fact that sometimes

God just hits you where it hurts

and that is your resources

if you're not right with God.

But let's just say you looked at that

and you say, well, I don't have sin in my life.

I'm not perfect, but I don't have sin in my life.

I'm reading my Bible.

I'm in church.

Well, it might be that God has just taken you

through a season of leanness to teach you contentment,

to teach you what it's like to have enough,

to teach you to live below your means, okay?

The point being here is that we need to learn

and whatever state we're in,

they're with to be content.

Because here's the thing, folks,

we think to ourselves,

what can take a person out of church?

Isn't it alcohol?

Isn't it fornication?

Isn't it just some sexual sins?

Isn't it just railing?

Well, you know, sometimes one of the things

that takes people out the most is just covetousness.

Say, how so?

Well, they start working extra jobs missing church

because they feel like they don't have enough.

They feel like, oh, I just don't have enough.

No, you might just have enough.

You just might be a greedy, covetous person

willing to sacrifice church services

in order to make more money to buy yourself a helipad.

Because you want a yacht.

You want a helipad.

You want this, that, and the other, you know,

and you're willing to sacrifice spiritual things

in order to have those things.

You know, you're not a person who knows what enough is

because once you get the helipad,

you're not going to be happy with that.

Godliness with contentment is great gain.

We brought nothing into this world

and it is certain that we can carry,

we will carry nothing out.

You know, we need to make sure that as God's people,

we protect ourselves from having the love of money,

which is the root of all evil, okay?

So it's like, I've had enough.

Enough is enough.

My brother, keep that thou hast unto thyself.

And Jacob said,

Nay, I pray thee, if now I have found grace in thy sight,

then receive my present at my hand,

for therefore I have seen thy face,

as though I have seen the face of God,

and thou was pleased with me.

And look, you know, don't always think that

when you don't have enough, and maybe it's true,

that somehow that means that God

is just cursing you or something, okay?

And this, we need, you know,

there's like a thin line that we walk

between like being blessed of God equates

to having money and possessions

with having like scarcity at times.

Because sometimes we need to go through seasons of scarcity.

We need to go through,

some people just need to experience what leanness is, right?

Some people need to know what it's like

to not have a whole lot of money.

Because they've never struggled

ever in their entire life.

They don't know what it's like to just struggle

to barely make ends meet.

They don't know what it,

maybe you've just been given a silver spoon,

born with a silver spoon in your mouth.

You don't know what it's like to like work hard

and earn money and pay bills

and be behind sometimes and have to pray things down.

You don't know what that's like.

So you know what?

You might need to experience a little scarcity in your life.

A little bit of leanness to toughen you up a little bit.

Maybe make you pray a lot more.

And you know what?

When people have too much, they don't pray a lot.

They have a tendency not to pray.

They have a tendency not to rely upon the Lord.

They have a tendency to just what?

Expect it because it's there, right?

Whereas, you know, people who have experienced seasons

of leanness of quote unquote poverty, scarcity.

When they get something, first of all, they appreciate it.

But number two, you know what?

You know what they do?

They don't just expect it all the time.

And they realize like,

this can be taken away at any given moment.

And if it is taken away, they're like,

well, I've been here before.

I know what it's like to be broke.

You know, I know what it's like to not have enough money.

I know what it's like to just barely get by.

You're like, no, man, I'm going through a tough time.

I can't buy any Starbucks.

I can't get this.

And you know, it's so hard.

We're just barely making it.

We're just barely, you know, we just, we get steak and stuff.

It's just, but we can't have any size or so.

You probably don't know what it's like to struggle.

You know, you may not even know what it's like to be hungry.

That's a real thing.

You know, you may not know what it's like

to actually be hungry, to not eat three meals.

And so, you know, it's important for us to recognize

what enough is.

And if you're going through a season of scarcity,

don't automatically view it as God punishing you.

Maybe he's just training you,

because you're just really soft as a Christian.

You don't really know what that's like.

And you need to be toughened up a little bit.

Emotionally, physically, spiritually.

And you know what?

Maybe a moment of scarcity is good for you,

so that you learn how to pray things down from God too.

Now I will say this, you know, right now,

I'm experiencing a season of abundance.

And to the point where I feel like I can be a blessing

to others, I can, you know, help my dad,

I can support my family, my mom if she needs help,

my wife, my children, my dad gets to live with me,

I get to just help him to just, you know,

live a normal life, I can give to the building,

I can give to others.

I have like an abundance, and I'm thankful for it.

But I also know this stuff can be taken away

at any given moment.

But it's okay, because I know what it's like to be broke.

I know what it's like not to make a whole lot of money.

My wife and I both know what it's like to just,

you know, split fries as a date.

Okay?

You like split fries.

Yeah.

I remember that's how it was like

when we first got married.

You're like, oh man, that's not,

no, no, no, I'm talking about different poverty.

I'm talking about like, I gotta cancel

my memberships, you know, we're broke right now.

We gotta cancel Netflix.

Oh, we're so broke, we can't afford crime.

We just don't know what we're gonna do.

You probably don't know what leanness is then.

Okay?

Learn what it's like to be able to legitimately say,

I've had enough, I have enough.

Now, obviously, Jacob is imparting this gift

to his brother, not because he needs it,

but because he wants to be a blessing to him.

And it says in verse 11,

even take I pray thee my blessings,

my blessing that is brought to thee

because God had dealt graciously with me

because I have enough.

And he urged him and he took it.

So I like what it says here that he takes it

because, you know, Esau is very gracious,

but he also graciously receives as well.

Okay?

So what do you mean by that?

Well, we have to learn how to receive gifts as well.

You know, if someone wants to be a blessing to you,

someone wants to be a blessing to you,

let them be a blessing.

Because it is more blessed to give than to receive.

And so you're like, well, I don't need it,

but you know, sometimes you just gotta accept the gift

just because someone wants to give to you,

someone wants to be a blessing to you,

be a humble person by just saying,

thank you so much for this, I really appreciate it.

Okay?

So he takes it, not because he needs it,

but because he knows that his brother,

it means a lot to his brother.

Verse 12 says,

and he said, let us take our journey

and let us go and I will be before thee.

And he said unto him, my Lord knoweth

that the children are tender in the flocks

and the herds with young are with me

and if men should overdrive them one day,

all the flock will die.

So basically he tells them like, you know,

let me catch up, I'm gonna be going this way.

Now keep in mind that in chapter 31,

God had told Jacob that he wanted him to come back

or he eventually come back to Bethel, okay?

But he actually does not do that.

Skip down to verse number 16.

It says,

so Esau returned that day on his way unto Seer

and Jacob journeyed to Sukkoth

and built him in house and made booths for his cattle.

Therefore the name of the place is called Sukkoth

and Jacob came to Shalem, a city of Shechem,

which is in the land of Canaan

when he came from Pandanarum

and pitched his tent before the city.

So we have a problem here

because he's supposed to go to Bethel

but then he ends up going to Sukkoth instead.

And we see that he's planning to be here

for quite some time because he's building a house there.

He's making booths for his cattle.

So it's one of those things where it's just like

he's obeying God by leaving Laban

and going in the direction of his home

but he's kind of only halfway obeying

because he's actually going to Sukkoth instead

and remaining there for quite some time.

Now he said, what's the significance of that?

Well, the next chapter,

you'll see why that plays an important role

and why he shouldn't have done that.

Cause what happens,

Dianna goes to see the daughters of the land, okay?

And we're going to visit that next week.

A major issue comes about that

but you know what, this shows us

that God expects for us to fully obey,

not halfway, amen?

And sometimes when we only halfway obey,

you know, half obedience is disobedience.

Delayed obedience is disobedience, right?

That's what we teach our kids.

Delayed obedience is disobedience.

And when they did that,

they ended up suffering the consequences of it, okay?

And so we'll visit that next week.

What is the primary principle

that we can learn from chapter 33?

Well, if you learn anything, learn this.

You know, don't be afraid to go talk to Esau.

Don't be afraid to go reconcile with Esau.

There's a problem that you have

with the brother in Christ,

what's the worst that can happen?

And look, no one's going to punch you here, okay?

You know, no one's going to chop you in the throat.

You know, no one's going to harm you or anything.

You're like, wow, I just don't know what they're going to say.

Think of the worst possible insult

they can dish out at you and make peace with it.

Think of just the worst possible thing

that they can say to you,

the worst possible, you know,

receipt that they can have on you,

make peace with it and just go do it.

But learn how to practice reconciliation.

Do not avoid situations, confront them,

especially if they're keeping you up at night.

Especially if you're just like,

if you can't, just like, man, it's destroying your life,

just go talk, come talk to me.

If you're mad at me, come talk to me,

what's the worst that can happen?

You know, one of them, you might throw me out.

Well, that is true.

That is true if you don't repent of a particular sin, right?

You know, according to the first Corinthians chapter five,

but let's just be honest,

that's probably not going to happen

because if you're coming to talk to me,

you're coming to reconcile.

Let's pray.

Father, we thank you so much for your word.

Help us as your people, Lord, to be peacemakers.

Help us to desire reconciliation.

It's very uncomfortable at times

when you have to reconcile with someone,

but Lord, it's your will.

And it's the way we can endeavor

to keep the spirit of unity in the bottom of peace,

not just in church, but in our families,

in our marriages, with our children, with our parents,

and with loved ones.

I pray that you help us, Lord, to keep that in mind

and to make this a part of our Christian life

just as much as Bible reading is,

as much as prayer is, as much as souling is,

that we would make reconciliation

a spiritual discipline in our lives.

We love you and we thank you.

Pray the sins in Jesus' name, amen.