This is killing the passion in your relationships. Pastor Steven Furtick

Passion dies when debtors become collectors. Let's look at it.

Debtors become collectors.

One of the most bizarre parables Jesus ever told, the

stories he would tell that had a deeper meaning. One

of the most bizarre ones to me is this one.

In Matthew chapter 18, verse 21, Peter comes up to Jesus.

Matthew 18:21

He goes, Lord, you've been teaching about forgiveness, and grace

and mercy is great. How many times shall I forgive

my brother or sister who sins against me?

Now, what we're about to read, I think it can

come on the screen, maybe. Yeah, there it is.

And so, he says, how many times shall I forgive

a brother or sister?

Now, what Jesus is about to do, he's.

About to take the limit and the lid off of

the amount of grace and mercy that we would offer

to another human being. Because Peter's like trying to show off.

He's like, should I do it like up to seven times?

Wouldn't that be impressive? And Jesus is like, nope.

I tell you not seven times, but 77 times. The

better translation is 70 times seven. And he's not saying

on time 491, you can slit their throat. He's saying

seven is the number of completion and perfection. So it's

perfection times perfection, completion times completion, like as many times

as it takes. It doesn't mean you allow people to

continue to abuse you. It doesn't mean you don't put

distance in relationships sometimes. He's not only saying, he's saying

in your heart, you got to forgive them as many

times as it takes for you to stay free.

Watch this. This is where it comes.

It all comes together for me. He said, all right.

And apparently Peter doesn't quite get it. Peter's like, all right, 77.

So on 78, I could choke him out. And so,

so Jesus is like, all right, let me give you

a story. The kingdom of heaven is like a king

who wanted to settle accounts with his servants.

Next verse, please.

As he began the settlement, A man who owed him 10,000

bags of gold, that's a lot.

A man who owed him 10,000 bags of gold was

brought to him.

Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered

that he and his wife and his children and all

that he had be sold to repay the debt. And

at this, the servant fell on his knees before him.

Be patient with me, he begged, and I will pay

back everything. This is a picture of religion, by the way. God,

I'll pay you back. The master does not accept his offer.

He knows this is impossible. Look, you ain't paying me back.

But he, look, he takes pity on him. He takes

pity on him. And that's what God did for you

in Christ. You didn't like pay God back. You didn't

all of a sudden stack up enough good works where

God's like, you know, that's.

Bag number 10,000. You're clear now. You may go.

It's just not what happened. He took pity on him.

Canceled the debt. Didn't give him more time. Just tore

the thing up altogether. He asked him for more time.

He said, now, how about we just cancel this?

And he let him go. What does he do with

his newfound freedom?

Well, when he went out, Jesus said, but when he

went out, you're expecting him to pay it forward, right?

Because once you have a payback mentality, it is very

hard to break out of. And if your relationship with

God you think is about payback, you're going to have

a very difficult time giving grace because you don't know

how to receive it. So he goes out and he's

had his debt forgiven, but he hasn't had his mindset

changed yet. That's where a lot of Christians are. That's

where a lot of marriages are. You've had your sins forgiven,

but you're still operating by a ledger system. And so

he goes out, he finds one of his fellow servants.

Let's say this represents your husband or wife. I know

this is not commonly a marriage text, but I think

it's an excellent one.

Who owed him 100 silver coins. This dude.

Got forgiven for 10,000 bags, and now he finds somebody

who owes him chump change.

Everybody say chump change.

And I don't care how anybody has ever offended you

in your life, it is chump change compared to how

our sins offended a holy God. Chump change. And so,

look what he does. He grabbed him. You expect him

to hug this dude. Hey, man, I just got some

good news. I want to give you some good news, too.

I don't have to pay the master anymore, so you

don't have to pay me. Now, go into it likewise.

But he comes at the guy, and he grabs him,

and he begins to choke him.

And he said, pay back what you owe me. He

demanded from debtor to collector in a moment.

And his fellow servant, now we've seen this scene before,

fell to his knees and begged him, be patient with

me and I will pay it back. In other words,

he just needs some of the same grace that this

guy just got.

But the man won't give it.

And I wondered in my mind studying this text this week.

You know, I've always said that the man had a

bad heart. Maybe it wasn't that his heart was bad.

Just thinking.

Maybe he still intended to pay the master back, so

he sets out to collect because he still can't believe

that his debt was canceled. Maybe he's still so stuck

in this mindset.

This religious mindset, and he's going after this.

Guy, and he refuses.

I don't think he really got it. If he really

got it.

He would have given it. Don't you think if you

really get grace, you'll give grace? Once your sins are forgiven,

he who forgives much loves much, don't you think?

But he refused. He said, no, man.

And he had the man thrown in prison. We do

this to people all the time. We imprison them awaiting payback.

Some of you have imprisoned a spouse emotionally because of

something they did 36 months ago. Some of you have

imprisoned a spouse emotionally because of something somebody else did

to you that you're taking out on somebody who didn't

even do it. But when the other servant saw, here's

the thing about payback. If you insist on living by

the system of payback, you'll always be the one punished.

You'll always be the one who ends up choked. Watch,

when the other servant saw what had happened, they were

outraged and they went and.

Told their master everything that had happened.

And then the master called the servant and he said,

you wicked servant, I canceled all that debt of yours

because you begged me to. Like you got in and

you got set free by grace and now you want

to demand what the.

Law requires of somebody else? Shouldn't you have had mercy

on your fellow servant? Just as I had mercy on you.

Now I hear it.

Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be your name.

Your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as

it is in heaven. And give us this day our

daily bread and forgive us our debts.

As we.

Forgive our debtors.

How dare you choke somebody else when God had mercy

on you?

How dare you ask God for patience and you demand payback?

How dare you bow your knee to God and then

stand over your brother, your sister, your husband, your wife, choking, saying.

Pay me what you owe me.

I don't know about you, But I want to give

a lot of grace because I think I'm going to

need a lot to make it to heaven and make

it through this life. I can't choke you because I

know that I'm the one who should have been choked.

I know that usually whatever I see in you is

a reflection of something that I know is in me.

And so his master in anger handed him over to

the jailers to be tortured. Doesn't say the master tortured him.

He handed him over to be tortured. See, that's what

happens in a marriage. When you're so quick to bring

up all these offenses.

And you're so quick.

And you keep a five-year history of things that she said.

Or things that he did. And you can pull it

up on command. It's amazing. You just got it on

speed dial.

You just.

Like, whoa. You're a collector. You think you're God's bounty hunter.

And when you live that way, God says, I got

to hand you over.

Watch this. Because of Romans 13.8.

Romans 13, it says, listen, it says, let no debt,

Romans 13, 8, let no debt remain outstanding, debt remain outstanding,

except the continuing debt.

To love one another.

For whoever loves, see, you came into your relationship with

God as a debtor. God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

If you're saved, if you're set free, if you're filled

with God, if you have forgiveness, if you have remission

of sins, if you've been cleansed, it wasn't because you

paid God back. It's because you bowed down on your

knees and he took pity on you and he had

mercy on you. Now, don't you get up off your

knees and start grabbing people by their throats. Those who

get up off your knees and start putting your hand

on your hip and waiting for them at the door

every time they mess up. Sometimes you better get your

hand off your hip and uncross your arms and throw

your arms around somebody and say, I forgive you like

he forgave me. I give grace like I was given

grace and grace will change a life.

Half of y'all are convinced. Let me put it.

To you this way. In the Old Testament, when when

something unclean paul uses this analogy he says the the

husband who doesn't believe is sanctified by the wife who

does believe it's not just about you the the wife

who doesn't believe is sanctified by the husband who does

believe it doesn't mean that your relationship with god can

be transferred to another person But your relationship with God

can transform another person when they see the example of

the grace that you claim to have been given operating

toward them.

It'll change them. It'll change them. It'll change them.

Nagging won't change them. Fussing won't change them. Demanding won't

change them. But grace will change them. Grace is power.

Grace will wash. Grace will sanctify. But in the Old Testament.

I'm almost out of time.

You got time? You got time? You got time? Can

I tell you?

In the Old Testament, when the unclean was in contact

with the clean, they had all these laws that when

something unclean, ceremonially unclean, many issues could cause someone to

be ceremonially unclean. When the unclean contacted the clean, in

the Old Testament, the unclean defiled the clean.

But one day, Jesus changed this.

Because one day, Jesus was walking along.

And a woman who had an issue of blood, which

would have made her unclean. She came up on her

knees behind.

Jesus because she knew she couldn't approach him with equal standing.

She touched the hem of his garment. The unclean touched

the clean. But see, in the Old Testament, if the

priest was clean and got touched by the unclean, the unclean.

Would defile the clean.

What makes Jesus a great high priest is.

That when that unclean woman... Touched him who.

Was the essence of purity and perfection.

The unclean didn't.

Defile the clean. The clean purified the unclean.

Now if Christ is in you.

Sometimes.

Sometimes.

You got to allow God to use you to touch

somebody else with the same grace that he reached down

and rescued you with.

I'm a debtor. I don't know about you. I'm a debtor.

I'm not a collector. I'm a debtor. I'm not a collector.

I remember that he paid a debt he didn't owe.

And I owed a debt that I couldn't pay.

And it's because of his blood and his righteousness that

I'm counting on every day when I access. I access

the throne of grace boldly because Jesus, my high priest,

wasn't afraid to touch the unclean. But he touched me

and he changed me and he made me whole. And

I refuse. I refuse to hold your sin against you

when God didn't count my sin against me.

This will change some marriages if we can become debtors together.

We all need the same grace.

We're breathing in the same oxygen that.

Was enabled by God's grace. We're all living on the

same stuff.

Let no debt remain outstanding except the continuing debt to

love one another for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law.

Love will take you way further than than the law

ever could.