Episode #4 - John Boesing IV

What's up everybody, thank you for tuning into this episode of

the podcast. We've got a good one in store

for episode 4 with a lot of good wisdom and advice along with a

very interesting salvation story.

So we're excited about this one. I do want to note again that we

are conducting weekly Google Meet calls on Mondays to kind of

review these episodes, but also to give people an opportunity to

give their personal stories and testimonies.

It's an opportunity for you to get your voice heard and speak

of the things that God's doing in your life.

So we really look forward to these.

They've been really awesome. We heard about the miraculous

things that happened just this last time and uplifting words of

encouragement. So please join us next time,

7:00 PM on Mondays. If you don't have the

information to reach out to us, we would love to have you join

and, and, and give some input to us.

So with that, we will send it back over to the podcast.

And thank you for tuning in again.

God bless. John Bossing the 4th, he's got

quite a great #4 story, yeah. And we'll try to navigate it and

see if we can get there. But this will be also.

I was talking to him last night. This will be our first guest

that went through a pretty big chunk of his life without having

knowing really much anything about religion or, or, or

Pentecostal or any of that. So we'll just start from the

scratch. Dad, we'll told me last night

there was a particular story when you were young that kind of

planted the seed for that. There might be something out

there other than just nothingness.

Yeah, when I was four years old, my mom went to a coma for two

weeks. And at the time, my sister was

five, I was 4, my brother was 2. You know, you're just kid, You

don't know anything about it. What happened?

We was just told that she was sick.

And later on life, 7th grade, I decided to ask her.

I said, you know, mom, when you went into a coma, could you hear

people talking around you? Would you see?

Would you experience what was it like?

And she said, when I laid there, I, I saw an image of a man with

light just shooting out from him, so radiant and calm and

tranquil. And as I approached, it was such

a piece and a calm. And I said, well, who was it?

And she goes, I think it was Jesus.

You know, when we were growing up, being called gentile would

have been nice. We were called heathens.

And so neither side of my family, mom or my dad was

involved in any type of religious activity.

You know, they said if you wanted to go to church, fine,

go. But they didn't practice.

They didn't live it. I didn't have no example in

front of me on either side, even going grandparents and so forth.

And so, you know, I asked her, I said, you know, so how are you

comprehending what was going on or not?

And she goes, I don't know. All of a sudden the thought just

came. I got to go back and raise my 3

kids. And so that's when she woke up

from that. And so from there I was just

like, OK, well who is this Jesus?

Because I would, I would like to know about this peace and calm

that she's talking about and this grandeur of majestic, you

know, and I'm like, you know, so that was the seed that was

planted. And so I would go to various

churches. I won't name any of them.

But the truth of the matter is when I went to them, they were

very unfulfilling. It was bad.

It's like, you know, here I am 13 years old.

I'm trying to find a spiritual experience.

But the places that I went to didn't offer that.

So I didn't pursue it. I was just like, well, you know,

if this was being called a Christian, I don't feel any

different. I got baptized.

I said I got sprinkled in the name of the Father, Son, the

Holy Ghost. I got wet a little bit, but it

was just, like I said, it was unfulfilling.

I mean, there was nothing there. It felt like for, you know,

talking about a God so great. You know, the reciprocation of

what I've got was like, 0. Yeah.

So we went further on into life, and then that's when we went

into the old Marine Corps. There you go.

And that's where that's where it all came into a reality of it.

And what happened was, is I'm on the East Coast, North Carolina

attached off a helicopter squadron.

We were actually considered a floating squadron where you

would go out to the Mediterranean for six months,

come back the land for a year, go back out six months and going

through that whole time. Well, when I first got out of a

school and went to campless June, that squadron had just

left two weeks ago, so I missed the float and everyone's like,

you don't want to go on one of those anyway.

You know, it's terrible. You got to live out of the shoe

box in your sea bag. The food's nasty, you know, So

I'm like, yeah, I don't want to go.

So when they came back and the next appointment was getting

ready to wrap up, they're like, all right, John, you're coming

with us. And I told my top, you know, I'm

like, hey, hey, top man, I, I don't want to go.

He goes, don't worry about it. I got you.

I'm like, all right, cool, top, you know.

So the first, the Sergeant major of the squadron, you know,

requested me and they said, no. I said, I don't know how you did

that top 'cause he's above you, you know, he goes, I've been in

here for a while. All right, good.

You know. Then all of a sudden, the next

set of orders came down from the commanding officer of the base,

'cause when you, when you go float, you go composite, you

bring the air in the ground, everything comes together.

And I don't know what he said or where he went, you know, but I

got out of it. I'm like, oh, yeah, you know,

I'm not doing this thing. I'm telling you, you know.

And about a week later, you know, he's like, oh, man's

corporal, I need to talk to you. Like, oh, man, they say this

don't sound good. And he's like, I did everything

I could. Just want you to know I did

everything I could for you, but these orders are coming down

from Headquarters Marine Corps. The commandant is saying you're

gone. I said, well, you can't go above

that. It looks like I'm going, you

know, so I'm on the board ship and when you're on there, you

have a 2 shifts. You're either 7:00 in the

morning, seven night or seven night, 7:00 in the morning.

And so when I got off a little bit earlier, I got into what

they call a rack. It's your bed.

It's a rack because it's like a torture rack and that's why they

call it that. And the other guy that got off,

he was on top. I was on on the middle.

So every time that he would get off work, he would step on my

rack and launch himself up to his.

Well, I would be about in the middle of a sleep when this

happened. So after about, I don't know, a

couple weeks, I got fed up and so he, he came off 1 morning and

jumped man, I, I felt like he just like shaking the rack and I

jumped out of that thing. I said, all right, buddy, get

down. He said what?

I said get down off of that rack.

It's happening. Are we talking about?

I said, get down out of that rack, man, you, you are

deliberately waking me up every I told you not to do that and

you keep doing it. Well, that's the only way I can

get it. No, you don't have to find

another way. And now we're doing it and

there's no, I can't do that. And I just, I said, this has got

to stop, you understand, You know, so I got back in there.

And so it's so humiliating. The next night he's out talking

with three guys outside and just right outside the rack there and

he starts talking about the Lord.

And I'm like, what he says sounds right.

You know, it's like, man, he's talking about he's getting a

Bible study set up down at the child hall with the Gunny down

there and about 14 nights. And I'm like, man, I I'm going

to have to swallow my pride and ask.

And I said, hey, his name is Brother Ken Arkin.

I said, hey, hey, Ken. I said, would you mind if I came

down to the child hall with you? He's like, yeah, I would love

it, man. I'm like, are we we still cool

about the other incident that, you know, he's like, yeah, don't

worry about it. You know, so that that started

off and went down there to the child.

And I said start off about 14 of us and within about two weeks it

was just me and him that was it. That was on there.

So he would teach me and we would talk about church and he

had a the Pentecostal that had a big old binder.

I forget what to call it, but it's had all these lessons in

it. I forget it's not a searching

for true thing, but it's a it's just a big old binder and had

it. We just went through that every

night for about 10 hours for the whole ship.

And then eventually through it, you know, you start to

understand. He didn't, he didn't push it,

which was good. But God revealed to me, you need

to repent. You need to get baptized and you

need to get the Holy Ghost, you know, and I all sudden, I guess

fear came upon me because I'm out here in the middle of the

ocean and all the sailors in that say, do you know why this

ship is designed the way that it is?

I'm like, no, he says it's kind of look like an aircraft.

He's on the Guam. I said that's why you guys call

it going under any minute because of what this is what's

happening. I said, that's awesome, man.

I'm, I'm facing eternity. Yeah.

And you're fixing to attack this thing or wanting them to.

I'm like, oh, man. And he just kind of like,

please, Lord, let the sun come up another day.

I just, I, I got to get saved. And so we were heading our next

port was in Sicily and Italy. And I said, hey, man, can you,

can you baptize me? He's like, Are you sure you want

me to do it? I said, I don't know why not?

You got the Holy Ghost, right? He said, yeah.

I said to me, you're authorized to do this.

I said, I have to do this, man. You told me, you know, you know,

in this word, you told me I got to do this and I don't want to

wait. I can't wait.

This is my soul and the balance here.

He's like no problem. So we got out, we pulled in the

port and Sicily got to change your clothes.

I said I don't want to do just right, right here in front of

everybody where they're coming in and off the boat.

I said, let's go down here, you know, couple 100 yards.

And yeah, he baptized me there in the Mediterranean Sea.

So that that was that. And then I so I repent.

It got baptized and I need the Holy Ghost.

I had no idea what have you and I was just up board ship up on

the flight deck, you know, you have watching that make sure

that all the helicopters are chained down and that I'm out

there to bow the boat. I didn't know any better.

And just here I am, Lord, just with my hands up, you know, I

didn't say anything. I'm like, come on, man, how's

this? How's this supposed to happen?

You know, I'm standing like an idiot.

I don't know. I get.

That's why I see the thing about Titanic.

So, yeah, that's what I look like right there, just out

there, you know, and, and so the crews ended.

We went back and I went to the church.

And that morning, I forget what the message was or what have

you, but there wasn't an altar call.

And I'm just like, man, this thing is going on.

I'm getting nervous, you know? And then they had Sunday night

service. And like I said, I have no idea

what the message was. He started start talking, man,

Tears start running down my face.

I'm like, I don't know why. And I'm just like, I got to go.

I got to go to the altar, right, Right in the middle of their

service and everything, You know, I just, I didn't, I didn't

care. I knew the urgency for me is I

got to get saved. I got to fulfill this plan of

salvation. So I went up there, start

praying for me. And then all of a sudden it was

just like warm oil just hit the top of my head and just slowly

went down my hands and that started shaking, you know, and

I'm pretty reserved. So this was pretty dramatic for

me, you know, start, start speaking in tongues.

No one told me, hey, say this or that.

It's just that this is how it happened.

And through that it let me know how this experience is real.

And just like I say to anybody else, if, if you can show me

scripturally a better way or closer way to live the God, I'm

all for it, you know, but for right now, from what I see, the

message that comes from the, the Pentecostal Apostolic movement,

this is this is it, you know, So that's, that's the experience.

What do you think comparing yourself before your

transformation, like before your, before your, before your

repentance, baptism, Holy Ghost, What do you think about how your

state of mind was before that and after?

Do you feel like you had that radical change that some people

talk about, or it was it like a gradual kind of thing for you?

I'd say it's almost kind of radical.

The whole, the whole thing is like growing up and not having

no one talk, talk about the Lord or any kind of an example to be

given you, you're just right along with the masses.

And so then when you do start hearing the truth and that, then

you realize, you know, the grace of God to allow you to be alive

and, and to hear this truth is pretty, you know, it's, it's

awakening. It's kind of like get put and go

jump in that pool of water that's cold, you know, so you

know. And was that in North Carolina?

Because North Carolina is where you were, you would go back.

Or was it in Italy? No, or I got the Holy Ghost was

in New River, North Carolina. OK, that was where the church is

at. That's where actually I I seen

my first miracle in that not one of these TV show things going on

anything like that. They actually had a lady she had

cancer and she was in a wheelchair, couldn't walk.

You know, I've been to several services seeing where, you know,

they Wheeler in she's in the back.

But for this service, you know, all of a sudden you hear, you

know, women high pitched scream, you know, I'm like, hey, what's

going on over here? You know, she was, she was

walking like slowly. It's kind of like you having to

get your muscle strength back into your legs and that for not

walking. And then eventually, yeah, she

was walking around, start dancing around the front and

stuff. I'm just like, yeah, and all,

you know, how's all of it? How?

How old were you at the time? I went to Marine Corps when I

was 18. I got baptized again.

I went on, did it in church, you know, just because I thought,

well, maybe this will make it. She'll pastor, licensed

minister, baptize me, even though in my heart I got

baptized in Mediterranean. Yeah.

So that was November 7th, 1986. So that would put me at 20

years, 20 years old. Wow.

So we're pushing almost 40 years here.

I want to hear more about your your story still, but then also

want some background on you. I feel like I don't actually

know where you're from. Are you from Missouri?

Yeah, actually, I grew up in Saint Louis.

Oka. For I don't remember, John, we

moved down here in 20 or 2005. Was it I think somewhere in

there. So, you know, around, you know,

30 years there. Saint Louis, places getting kind

of rough, have no desire to go back there whatsoever.

And you know, it's funny, the older I got, even even like

sports and stuff like that, it's kind of all kind of fading away

as far as being involved with it.

Yeah, yeah. Like I said, I grew up bad thing

too. Like for me, grew up very poor

too. My mom did the best that she

could with just her. I didn't have my dad wasn't in

the picture, you know. And so there would be times, a

lot of times that dinner was potato chips or was toast or

mayonnaise on bread or, yeah, crackers.

It was, it was rough. It was brutal.

Yeah. And my mom was working.

It was just our as kids. And so, you know, McDonald's at

the time, a Happy Meal was like $2.00 for the thing.

She can only afford to take us like once every three months.

And that was like a, that was a treat.

Now you guys are out there doing it everyday thinking nothing

about it, you know? We're thinking about it when we

hit the scale. You know, but it was a treat

back then. But you know, I don't, I don't,

I look back and stuff like that makes me more appreciative of

the things that I thought I have now.

Just just like with anything now, sure, everybody would like

to have on a newer car, nicer house and all that, but I've

always said in that too is, is, is that going to bring you

closer to God? And so I can do without that,

you know, so I got a 21 year old car that I'm out there driving,

as long as it still runs, I'm still driving it, you know, you

know, like I said, you know, I'd like to have that Lamborghini.

I'm not going to lie, I'd like to drive something like that,

but it still wouldn't bring me any closer to God or my

relationship with them. So.

Yeah. And that mindset, I think, is so

important because it's so easy to get caught up in materialism,

you know? And it's, to me, it's just

distractions. I love that you've got that

mindset even now, you know? Yeah, you know, a lot of times

I've, what I see too is, you know, the Bible says we're an

epistle read of all men. So all the actions and stuff

they do and whether you know it or not, people do actually look

and, and see you can, you can put a seed to either bring

someone closer to God or to drive them away.

Like like this recent incident with Charlie Kirk.

I've never followed the man on his podcast or anything like

that, but I started thinking who who would have thought that

going out, debating religion, politics, economy with, you

know, college students, that it would bring thousands of people

back to church worldwide, millions of people.

You know, I was just, you know, so when you see that, you just

never know how you respond to a situation, how someone sees you

respond to know like, yeah, I don't I don't think I want to be

around him no more. You know, that's not good.

So to. To go back to the very

beginning, you, you when you got the Holy Ghost or when that,

when they started talking to you about Jesus, did it, did it

click for you that this, this sounds exactly like that man

that my mom described as seeing in that coma?

Like, did you make that connection or was it just a seed

that had planted a long time ago and and just turned into

something else? Well, actually, when I did get

the Holy Ghost, I, I felt like I, I got something more than

what my mom had. Like she saw that and felt that,

but there's no way that she could have felt what I felt when

I got filled with the Holy Ghost.

And it was such a declaration in my life.

Like this is it, this is the real deal.

There is really a God out there. There are really consequences to

your actions now on what you can do, the divine being to help you

through all of this. So I, I just look at it that

way, you know, I was, I was better off.

Now a lot of people always say like, I want to go to heaven,

but I don't want to go tonight. If you give me a chance to go,

you know, out of here, I don't want to come, come back.

And that's why it's important to me for right now, like as a

father and to see my family and that as long as you're in

church, I know that you'll be taken care of.

As long as you're living right for the Lord, everything's going

to work out. So I don't have to worry about

coming back here. So it's time to go.

I'm going to go now. I'm not going to, you know, push

that. I'm not going to jump in front

of the bus or, you know, jump off a clue.

Yeah. Yeah.

I'm not going to do nothing like that, you know, But yeah, if I

could. Yeah.

That's, that's my ultimate goal, I guess, for any Christian is,

is I want to make heaven. I want to be there with the

Lord. It's been eternity.

That's all that matters. You know, I need to talk about

the grandeur, the majesty of the, you know, gates of Pearl

and the walls of Jasper. And that's all wonderful.

But the real jewel is Jesus. And that's where I'm, that's

where my heart's desires to go. Do you think your experience

growing up maybe just you're like the way you grew up, but

also being not a like, not in a like a Christian environment,

not being in a Pentecostal environment?

Do you think that has given you like a spirit of gratefulness

just like to how Jesus, how good Jesus really is to us?

Do you think that impacts you? Yeah, absolutely.

Because I think about it all the time.

I was like, why did he start with me?

You know what? What do I have?

I even look at myself. Who who am I that you should

bother with me? I have nothing to offer you, and

yet you've taken time to say you're special to me.

So yeah, that that does help for me.

I'm just thankful for my story or situation.

Just let you know that no matter who you are, you know God does

know you and to seek you out and then know that you do have a

heart that will worship and praise him and by going through

all that and being without him and now with them.

Yeah, I I can't see any other way like that.

And really what happened even too when I got the Holy Ghost

when I was a worship and that none of my family wrote me

letters. I'm about 3 months one of the

most disappointing or just loneliness feeling is a mail

call comes and everybody else is getting packages of cookies and

candy and letters and I'm sitting there month after month,

nothing, no girlfriend, no family, no nothing.

I was at such a low in my life of loneliness.

Of course you don't try to show it.

You know, still just go there, go to the gym.

You know, I like that rough exterior.

Hey, I got this kind of thing, but deep down, man, you're like,

man, I'm dying inside here. And then for from the step in

and. You know, here, let me let me

help you out. I just I'm I'm forever grateful

for that forever indebted. If you, if you don't mind me

bringing it up. You you mentioned that your dad

really wasn't in the picture, which he wasn't, but the few

times that he might have been, from what I understand, it

wasn't necessarily a really great father figure like

situation when he was there. It's you know what I mean?

Like it. You relied really on your mother

to to be every aspect of a parent to you.

Yeah, it's he won't hear this. So I'm, I'm, I'm fine.

He I still have to honor my father because of who he is in

that. But the choices that he made as

far as keeping a relationship together, we're not biblical.

So that's why it fell apart. And he was more concerned about

himself than his family. So for him to do that, you know,

as a father, you know, that's that's where the virus is worse

than the infidel type thing where he just he wasn't there,

didn't care about it. And you know, even to this day,

you know, he's just it's sad because I didn't want it to be

like that. And so I tried to like for

anything you see them kind of events and that take place and

you just want to say, I don't want to be like that.

I have a choice. Everybody has a choice.

You know, I could have been out here and be the shooter with

having said, well, it's because my dad now did this and that's

why I love it. No, no, you know better.

You can make the right choice. And so now as a as a as a

father, now I try to do the right thing.

Certainly, I mean each of us grapples with that, right?

Like that decision to kind of, you know, each of us has a

decision to put others before ourselves or put ourselves

before others. I think that's the biggest

struggle we all face. So do you think that, you know,

do you think some of that influence from you is just like,

I want to be that father to my family, you know what I mean?

I want to be that man for, for, for all those who come after me,

you know? Yeah.

Absolutely start to start it. I wouldn't say a legacy or

nothing like that, but yeah, I want, I want to be an example to

be remembered as a good faithful husband, father, you know, and I

try to do that like even like for dinners and stuff like that,

I'll eat last. You know, I have everyone else

to eat. And if there's nothing there,

just like the, the one night, all the all the hamburger meat

and Taco meat was gone. Hey, do you want to know you eat

it? I'm not hungry.

Well, I was hungry so I had to go and get the old frozen

sausage, egg, cheese bits and say, Hey, I want a these

instead. But you know, that's something

I'll, I'll, I'll sacrifice and I'll pay the price.

And that's, that's kind of like what the Lord even did too, you

know? You know what?

You guys can't do it. I know you can.

So I'm going to come down and I'll, I'll pay the price for

you. So I just as an example to go by

that. Yeah, I'll try to live by that,

that's for sure. So you, you, you were in North

Carolina and you were there for a little bit while you were

finishing out with the Marines, and then you went back to

Missouri on the Saint Louis area.

When you got back to Saint Louis, when you got back with

your family, what was the 1st like?

What was your thought process of how you were going to start your

new life now that you were out of the military and back where

you where you grew up? Yeah, I just do.

When I, when I got, when I got out, I was like, man, I don't

care. You have to work at McDonald's,

man. I'm not staying in Marine Corps.

But then I got back there and I couldn't even get a job at

McDonald's. It was terrible trying to find

an employment being at that time in Saint Louis, like when the

city first started, it was big because of the river and you

know, transport. And that's why that city grew.

And then as transportation got better through rail cars and

what have you, well, the river was became obsolete.

You know, like that Route 66 thing.

Ain't no one going that way no more.

So it's so job employment that was rough back then in Saint

Louis and going there and then, you know, I tried to also like

speak to my family because when you see this and you know what

the consequences are, you want your loved ones to, to make

heaven too. I mean, when you go to heaven,

you know, just like for this, you know, I, I think it'd be

great for all of us to be able to be there and worship, praise

God together to know, hey, man, we overcame the world, you know,

so you go back there and, and what's sad is, is they didn't

want to hear it, you know, and it's just like, well, maybe

that's why God started with me instead of them, because they

didn't want to hear it. And through that too, you know,

it's one of the things that I've learned.

And in this walk, one of the most important thing is don't

question when God speaks to you. And what I mean by that is, is

there's times you get thoughts in that and you're and you

start, man, is that me or is that God?

You know, obviously there's something good that's going to

uplift or encourage somebody to do something.

Then I say, yeah, you need to do it.

Obviously, if it's going to be something heinous, you know,

then it would be like, you know, you got to try the spirits.

Is this really God? Because he's not going to go

against his own principles. And then and I'll just like

recently I was coming home and Lord just like go the other way.

I'm like, go the other way, you know, why am I going to I, I

said, OK, you know, so I'm driving the other way.

I found out and he's like going to Dollar General.

I said I'm going to Dollar General for I don't go to Dollar

General for nothing, man. I know there's a one on every

corner here in Alabama, but I don't go to Dollar General, man.

And I'm like, what am I going to buy?

So I, I go up in there and I'm like, I'm just kind of walking

around like they're probably came out like this guy's getting

ready to shoplift, you know, you know, And so I was like, well,

Dahlia's kind of on a pineapple orange juice drink.

OK, so let me go over there. And then there was a young girl,

probably about 12, you know, in the juice section too, you know,

So I, I want to hurry up and get there because I didn't want to

be around a young girl, you know, just here's this guy

coming in here, walking around and now he's over here by this

young girl, you know, I'll be, I'll be questioning that too.

So we both went the other way and she ended up being at the

the front of the line and I was right behind her and she has

some medicine and a juice and that and I scanned the card and

her beat, you know, it's just like, and the guy said go ahead

and try it again. I was like, oh man, this isn't

good. So I said, hey, I said, I I know

why I'm here. I said, let me, let me take care

for you, young lady. I said God wants me to buy that

for you. She looked at me.

I said, I got this, you have a great day and the cashier's

like, Are you sure you're going to do this?

I said, yeah, this is this is what, This is why I'm here.

So I did it. So what I don't know is, is that

what happened? Was it for that cashier to see?

Were they thinking about something about God?

I need to answer. If you do this, then I'll

believe. Was it for the little girl?

Maybe later on. This is a seeded planet to hey,

you know what? Mommy didn't have the money and

some guy bought this or even her mom, you know, maybe she's out

in the car. You know, I don't know if I got

enough on that card. You know, my daughter's in there

and I really need that medicine. I have no idea, but I felt good

about being able to pay for that, being obedient to listen

to God because like I said, I don't go that way home to work

and I don't go to Dollar General and forgot to happen.

And I could have argued and went the other way and I could have

missed out on the blessing. And that happened and has

happened in my life too. And was a youth leader in in

Missouri and the Festus Church. And after the praise singing was

happening, the drummers, a young young gentleman came off and and

God press like pray for him struggling at school.

I say what? Pray for him struggling at

school. You know, he walked by.

I'm like nothing a week later that back then they have

testimony service, you know, talking about so he stands up.

So I was talking about how he's been being bullied in school,

his grades were dropping, you know, and I'm like, God wanted

me to intercede and step in and, and make up the hedge, stand in

the gap. And I disobeyed.

And that boy right there suffered because of it.

So that's why I just say whenever you feel impressed to

do something, pray for somebody or what have you, you need to

obey and not question it. That's pretty big because of the

last episode we did with Brother Lacombe.

He talked about the Gideon's fleece experience that he did

for himself. If you remember, he didn't know

if he was called a preacher or not.

And so when he went to service and he prayed, he was like God.

You know, if, if this is what you want from me, then have this

man come over to me and tell me and the course the the preacher

did. But if that preacher had not

listened, he would have never went to him.

Macomb would have never, may not have ever started preaching.

And that's such a domino effect. Yeah, and it could be such a

small thing too, even happened with you.

Cam was in the fellowship hall, you up there and you came down.

I didn't know that you were studying to be a minister, what

have you? But the Lord told me go up to

there and tell him it's it is his time to pick up the mantle.

I don't know if you remember. That I do.

I do, you know and thank you. And I was just like, you know,

but when you hear that, you're like, this can be like, man,

this guy. All right.

And I, I think that's the, the biggest part.

And I and I go back to you being on the battle of that boat, like

you said. And you are OK looking like a

fool, you know, and asking God to come into your life.

But I think that ability to put your pride aside, that's what

let God work in your life the way he has.

Yeah, the whole thing about this too is that God wants to use

you. And that's what everyone says,

use me Lord, Use me, Lord. But with them, when he tells you

to go do something and you question it, it's like you're

disobeying your parent. Like in the military, anyone at

a higher rank tells you to do something.

There was no questions asked. You did it right then and there.

You know, that's what I I believe.

God does how he wants. And the more that you can listen

to God, the more you're going to be used.

Yeah. You know, if I keep coming to

you, Cam, you know, if I'm God, I'm coming.

Hey, man, I want you to do this. And you keep saying what, I got

to drive over there or why do I got to pick up that, You know,

he's going to be like, OK, he's got to grow up.

I'm sure a little bit more because he's not listening.

Yeah, recommendation which you have to somebody who might

struggle to distinguish when God's talking to them, like

maybe they're sitting there struggling saying, is this just

my thoughts or should, is this a little, what kind of advice

would you give to somebody to kind of recognize?

Yeah. Well, this is always say if it,

if it's something that's good, if something's going to uplift

and encourage somebody, if you do it, then I say you do it.

You know, if it's something that you know, it's like this can

humiliate them, not me humiliate them in any kind of way or

fashion. I want to stray away from that.

And like I said, when you, when you feel it, like I say,

especially like that when you're looking and you just can't, you

know, you're not trying to, but you're scanning, you see

finally, not saying, you know, like boom, man, I pick up, pick

him up for whatever reason. Then God says you need to pray

for him for strength. Get up, go over there and you

just say, hey, I'm, you know, I'm just trying to hear the will

of the Lord in my life. And he just feels like he's

telling me to pray for your side.

If you don't mind. And you do that, then you find

out because like I said, even in the military, you wouldn't have

thought I was lonely and I'm depressed and all that.

But it was. And a lot of people put this

facade that everything is good, everything is great, everything.

But really they're not. They're hurting and struggling,

having the same kind of problems you are, and they need you.

And you don't know that, but God knows that.

That's why he's trying to tell you go over there.

And so that's why I say you want to heed that.

You know this one thing too, that you know why you have

prophecy. The reason why He had prophecy

in that is God is showing you hundreds of years from now, I'm

telling you what's going to happen.

So if I can do that, I can tell you what's going on with your

life. I want you to trust me, and

that's why we do that. Yeah, it's, it's pretty

powerful. I've always loved hearing your

testimony because the biggest thing for me is from the very

beginning of it, when you're trying to avoid getting on the

boat, essentially trying to avoid what was ads like I need

you on this boat, son. And you're like, no, there goes

to the next level. I need you on this boat, son.

No, next I would to to, I mean, Gee, I think about it.

How, how common do you think it was to have headquarters

specifically say no, This, this, this guy is going to be on that

boat. Yeah, it wouldn't have happened

because basically with the Sergeant major of the the

squadron, once he said he's coming, that should have been it

right there. It should have gone and then go

to the base commands, you know? Yeah, That that, that I've never

heard of that happening. And I, I thought about that too,

you know, if that would have went through, I, that could have

been my one chance to hear, hear the gospel to get in, you know,

I mean, like I said, you only get so many chances in life and

you got to take advantage of it. You know, I've heard and I, I

would have been of no excuse either because you would have

heard about, you know, Jesus and everything from my mom, other

people, all with that point. You heard about it, but you

didn't react on it. I would be, I would be guilty,

you know, And so I'm thankful that God took those extra

measures to say you're going, you're going, you know, so it'll

be like, yeah, I'm, I'm thankful.

I'm thankful for that. It shows how far God is going,

because I can't imagine that's a unique experience just for you.

But how many times does He reach out for each of us, right?

So come back to Saint Louis, try to talk to your family.

They they're not having any of it.

But that doesn't, you know, discourage you or anything like

that. You still kept going to church,

finding a church 1st and you just kind of followed after

that. You know, you just, you never

deviated away from it. And you, you had sold out, so to

speak, completely to this faith and this process.

And while you were in Saint Louis, I wanted to, to push

ahead a little bit. You were, you were never really

just at that time just at church.

You actually were involved quite handily in some of the, in some

of the youth programs that happened up in there throughout

a couple different churches. You mentioned it earlier, if you

go into that a little bit more for me.

Yeah, actually, I, I, I never seek for a position whatsoever.

I don't, I don't desire that to be, hey, look at me trying to

make a name for myself. It was never about that.

Whenever I moved and went to the the that church, it was always

that that pastor that came to me and said, hey, you know, we need

someone over the youth. Would would you do it?

And for whatever reason, I could relate, I guess because I'm a

kid, I don't grow up and I like to do the things that they do.

You know, I like going to amusement parks and, you know,

having fun and paintballing and all that.

I mean, football that I'm still, I'm still doing that.

And I could talk to him and relate to him.

And I just found in that that with a lot of kids in that just

being there for them and talking to them and showing that you

care, it was just unpackable, brought the youth together.

Every youth group we used to always after church, we'd

usually always go out like the Pizza Hut or Mexican place.

And, you know, we sit there and talk, you know, and be sitting

around the table. I was talking that and it just

grew a bond in that for that. And so, you know, for a lot of

youth in that that I, I see when you don't, you know, involve

them at all, then there's a disconnect there.

That happens to me when you're put in a osition like that.

No, no matter what ass or youth ass or whatever, it is your job

to find the lost coin in the house.

That's why I think there's a book called the Upside down

church. You know where it talks about

where it's the pastor needs to go find.

I need to know what your talent is.

I need to know what your talent is and that and how we're going

to use it and how we're going to put it involved in church.

We'd always have Friday night youth service.

That was always that Friday night.

We went wasn't very long. It was only an hour and that,

but I had I had everybody with a song, what we call sermon.

That's or what have you have two or three guys kind of like you

guys just did there at a little bit, you know, and you give you

five 5-10 minutes. And and then that also gets them

to start developing their walk and trust in it and believe in

God and the youth groups and that were just some they were

strong and I never thought that I really made an impact or

whatever. But I'm not a social media

thing, but my wife is. And she's like, yeah, you know,

you remember so and so they miss you and said, you know, the I

was like, wow, I didn't know they even cared.

Yeah. Thank you, You know, because,

because sometimes you know, the parents and that you're like,

hey, my kid, you need to do this and that.

I'm like, you know, you should be.

I don't say it, but I was like, you should have been handling it

at your house, man. I'm not here to do that, you

know, but I'm like, Oh, yes, ma'am, I'll try to get on, you

know. But yeah, it's and it and it's,

it's a good thing to get in there and get that experience

like that. Like I said, when you're doing

it to build the Kingdom and not yours, great things will happen.

That, that's the, the part that struck me the, the beginning of

what you said right there about how you didn't ever seek a

position, you know, and I, I'll be honest, when I was growing

up, I did, you know, like I was in church and that was just my

mindset. Like, oh, I'm going to be a big

preacher or something, you know, because that's kind of the area.

And I think that when I left church, God really had to break

me down to where I could have that mindset of it's about him,

you know, and everything that pulls it to him.

Did did you have that mindset immediately?

Because I'm interested in you didn't have a religious

background growing up at all until you found Christ.

Right, right. Yeah, I guess the positions of

that because that involved public speaking, which is

something I didn't even want to do in school.

You know, he had a have that report you got to give in front

of the class, you know, and you, you're shaking the papers going,

you know, he tried to let me just get through this, you know.

So I never saw the position like that.

Always wanted to do something, you know, great for God.

The thing that always what really impressed me was one time

I was I was there, we had a a guest speaker.

His name was Brother Scroggins. Didn't know.

I'm just a good old country boy type of guy that came in there

and he's preaching and he just stops and he turns and he looks

and he points at me and he says, you know, I'm not here to

embarrass you, son. But God just told me that you're

struggling with your job. You're not getting any sleep and

the devil is coming at you. That's why the attack is here

and I'm going to pray for you. I never told my wife or nothing,

man. I was like at work.

I was working for the cable company.

I was like, man, I'm getting yelled at for nothing, man, it's

not I didn't do that. I wasn't around there was

involved, but they blamed me for it and you know, I'm worrying

about it. So I'm not sleeping at night.

Everything what he just said. No one knew that but God and

God, you know, went through him as a vessel and used him.

And and so I said to myself at that point, you know what, more

than any other message that you can give to somebody, if

somehow, if you can be in tune with God, just to give a word of

encouragement. This is why I say don't question

when God tells you to do something because he's the one

that knows what's going on. And by doing that, it makes it

personal for that other person. Real is like, you know what,

there's no way you knew that, buddy.

There's, I'm telling you, there's no way you couldn't pull

it up on, you couldn't have Googled that information that

you just told me, you know, and that lets you know, you know,

like, yeah, God cares about me because he sent you and told me

that. And I've, that's the kind of

ministry that I, I desire to be a part of, to do that.

I think to me that's more impactful for myself.

So life can be pretty, pretty stressful.

Like all of us can agree on that statement.

Or like job. Struggle is real.

Struggle is real constantly, you know what I mean?

A lot of people tend to develop doubts and fears and allow that

to basically a road away their spiritual life.

What advice would you give to that person?

You know, the, to me, the whole thing is, is, is, you know, when

you go through those valleys and that it, it is hard.

The thing is, you guys just got to keep praying.

Like I, I'm a, I'm a firm believer in praise.

No matter what, I'm, I'm going to praise you.

My mindset has always been for what I've learned, for the, the

price that Christ paid on that cross, I owe I to keep going.

I owe him for that sacrifice. And I don't know if any of you

saw that movie, the passion that was so brutal.

And to know that that's what he went through to save me.

I, I, I told my wife, if I ever have a poster, I want that.

And I wanted to say how and tell me about your day again, just as

a, a reminder that you have nothing to complain about.

But like I say, that's for me. And but I know other people

struggle, but you got to be able to persevere.

And, you know, it's just like even like going to the gym and

that, you know, at first it gets, it's hard.

It's never easy. That's to say in the gym, it's

never easier. You only get stronger, you know?

So you just keep pushing and keep working at it.

And I've learned through the mindset, even through all kinds

of trials, just like a storm, you know?

Yeah, it's going to come, but it's going to go.

So that's like, even though, you know, my wife and that's always

like, oh, no, it's going to come.

We're going to have a turn. And I say, hey, look, man, I've

seen that before. You know, I'm not worried about

it. Now, if there's a Direct Line

and it's coming toward me now, of course I'm going to have

enough common sense to say we need to get out of here, you

know, or we're moving, going to another state.

You know, it's kind of like being like in Louisiana, you

know, they're like 5 days out. You got Katrina coming your way,

how we're going to stay four days out.

It's still your way, day way one you just coming your way.

Hey, man, you need to get out of there, man.

Don't. Don't sit there and think you're

going to survive this. It's like that, that, that story

where they, they always make fun of the, the person in the boat

who they keep passing by and he's like, hey, come get in my

boat. He says, no, God's going to save

me. He said I sent you 4 boats. 4

boats, a helicopter. Yeah, yeah.

You never took any of them. Sent you 4 boats.

It's not what you were looking for, but it was a way out.

Yeah, yeah. And that's it.

So that's what you know, this would just try to do.

Persevere. Struggle.

So we, we moved as a family up here, 2004 area whatnot.

We kind of, we kind of touched on it a little bit with a

previous episode. But just from your point of

view, what was the process and, and how it came about finding

Lifegate and just just getting involved with this church?

Because we looked at you, you went to a few different churches

and just didn't really feel it until you got to Lifegate.

Yeah, that's, that's absolutely right.

Well, we got down here. Of course, you didn't know

anything or anybody the area. But everything that's most

important is is you got to have a church to to be able to go to

the function to worship without that on this way.

The lesson that comes with the the little woman, you know, and

the very end of that is, is you know, you can go a long time

without hearing from the man of God, but you and your family are

going to suffer for it. So God showed me that through

through that Scripture. And so that's why it's like I

got to find a church. So we went to to the Huntsville

wand. You go in there, you worship or

what have you and you're like, yeah, I don't really feel like

this is the place. Went there to Tony to Decatur

Hartzell and I just told my wife said, man, I went to every

church in this area and I can't find nothing.

You know, Oh the heck, that can't be right.

I'm like, I'm just, I know you're not supposed to go by

feelings and that, but it just it, it doesn't feel right.

And she goes, well, me and mom and now we've we found a

preacher going to give a Bible find that, you know, you know,

she's, I forget what she said or what have you, but I finally

went there to the Tony church and brother Roger said, Hey,

look, I don't think this church is for you, but there's a young

minister down there off of Madison Blvd. close to where you

live. He's starting a new church.

I'm like, and I don't go to a new church man, you know, you

know, 'cause that's, that's just going to be him and his family.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, you go. It come from a, you know, 5-6

hundred people, you know, a church, you know, you got, I

don't know, only 10 or 15 in there.

That's but I said, you know what?

And this is what I just say too. As long as the people that are

there are spiritually in tune you, you can have a powerful

service even with that. And so, so we went there and I

went there and I said, you know, you know, it's, it's like it.

I like him and everything like that.

And after a few weeks, I, I just told us, like man, I said, I

don't know if I'm not getting it or he don't have another message

other than faith, but I'm tired of hearing about faith, man.

I, I can't, I said I, I can't, I'm not going to be able to grow

under this. You know, I got to have

something more than having faith, you know?

So I don't know if it's for him or for me.

I'm not listening or he's not listening, but one of us got to

get it together, you know. And so, yeah.

So watching your dad first start, you know, it compared to

where he's like season now. I mean, it's like night and day.

And so, yeah, it's been A and it's been an adventure.

There's been a bump in the road there, but, you know, overcame

that. But yeah.

And thank, thank God for other churches and those things

because not everybody's meant to go to the same church, right?

Like we all have different personalities.

Thank God other pastors and those things would reach out and

tell you like, hey. Yeah, They want to find their,

like, anything, you know, if you're an orange, you know, you,

you're not going to do very well up in Montana growing up there,

you know? Yeah, you're your planet in

different areas, you know, and just like anything like flowers

or what have you, you know, and we're both planted here, but I'm

not here to compete with you. We're both here to blossom and

grow. And so that's what we did.

So like right now, I'm really looking forward to when like

life gate becomes a church where miracles happen.

I, I'm just a firm believer that when you go to church and you

got everyone in there worshiping and one of mine, you know, you

should be having the miraculous take place.

You know, if you had that mindset, you know, just like the

expectation from some of the congregation isn't there, you

know, like when you go to NAYC or anything, like everyone is

there and everyone worship. So that's why everyone's like,

it's so great. A great, you can have that

experience in your church. If you have that expectation

that God is going to do something, I'm going to receive

something and it'll happen. Certainly, certainly.

It's a it's cool that you were able to come to Life Gate when

it was 5 and then you were three, you know, because that

was before Dalia ever showed up. Sister.

Horrible sister. Horrible.

That's right. The the the landmark, the anchor

holding us down. But I I'll tell you like I'm I'm

one you talk about expectation. You go to NAYC.

It's so big and everything. Expectation, of course, is a

little bit higher because you've got this great grand door

appearance and then you come back home and you may not have

that level of it. And a lot of us, myself

included, are moved by the exterior.

I don't think I could go to a church with eight people, at

least right now. I'm not spiritually mature

enough for that. Honestly, I'd be too distracted

by the mirrors on the other side.

Yeah, I mean, it was something. But just like anything in life

too, man, you have to go through in order to be more well-rounded

and that you got to experience certain things.

It's growing stages and that that that heled me because, like

I said, I've I've never been in like a home missions church

Oregon, what have you. And I just when I when I think

about the side of the church now, it's just like, where do

all these people come from? Yeah.

How did he get you? Know God's sin and.

Exactly. Before it's gone in that amount

of time, because when you see it from where you started with Life

Gate to now, it really puts it in perspective.

This wasn't just people transferring or something and

all. I think they're at the

forefront. I think the thing that always

gets me is you think back to the sheer amount of people who have,

you know, for various reasons come through the church.

You know what I mean? And the fact that like, you

know, you go through and, and you can think back and you can

see faces of so many different people.

You're talking about hundreds of people who have been in and out,

you know what I mean? For various reasons, but God

always is there. Like how how the number

continues to grow despite things that may hinder or things, you

know, it's like it's amazing to see God come back and put more

people in, you know what I mean? Whenever things change.

It is. And the other thing for me too,

like with live gate hearing the testimonies of basically the

three of you, you know, and what you guys went through through

birth and that to see the miracles that took place in your

life for the healings and that it's just like God is God is

with, you know, Brother Penn. I truly feel that he is the man

of God for Madison that he was called he is, you know, and he's

been blessed for it. And that's where I even sent him

that e-mail about the the widow woman, what God had told me.

I don't know if he ever showed you or anything that.

I don't know if he did. But but God, you know, God had

showed me, you know, I guess I can tell you that.

But anyway, the whole thing is is, you know, it always says

that you're saved by the foolishness of preaching.

You know, so I'm reading the story and that again and I'm

seeing the widow woman and it's like, you know, we're going to

I'm going to make this cake and then we're going to die.

I'm thinking, if I miss a meal, would I die the next day?

No, I said this, this woman had it been and and what I would

call like APOW Holocaust type setting.

That's how bad off she was to to say that we're going to eat and

then then we're going to die. You know, I was like, man, And

so for this guy to come, Elijah come walking up saying, Hey, you

know, give me that food. You know, he's sitting looking

like a fat cat. You know, you're like, that is

foolishness. You know, I thought to myself,

you know, if you came, I I better be prayed up because if I

didn't have any food and he came over here saying, Hey, God said,

give me you give me that. I'll be like my family comes

before you. So this is a decision that as as

a people you have to make on whether do you believe that this

is the man of God or not and your decision is life or death.

And so then, you know, I thought about Elijah, you know, I said

here he is. How was he being fed?

You know, said that the Ravens brought him the food.

Well, you know what kind of food that was?

Yeah, that's off of carcasses. I, I, I, I was going by the road

and I saw this deer and then I know it's bad, but it was

deteriorating, you know, and I'm thinking this is, this is what

yeah, Elijah was getting. You know, I couldn't do that

even right now, even starving. If you said here you go, John,

that's, that's, that's fresh Opossum, baby, right off.

You know, I would be like, I'm not going to eat that.

So God had told me he put your father in his position because

there's there's things that I'm not willing to do that he will

do. And that's why your father is in

that position to be the shepherd over this, you know, and you

know, you can always question, you know, hey, man, is this the

the right one? You know, is he living right?

And then that's where God showed me with Samuel when him and Eli

was laying down, you know, and then Samuel rises up and says,

Hey, you know, you called me and Eli said, no, go lay down, you

know, then it happens again. He said, no, you called me, you

know, when I said no, I didn't, you know.

So the third time, you know, then Eli finally got it, you

know, I said it. But the whole point of that is,

is in order to hear the voice of God, you still need to go and

listen to the man of God, you know, and that's, that's even

regardless of whether you think he's living right for God or

not, He's anointed. He's put in that position.

You need to obey, you know, because like I said, he heard,

you know, it was the voice of God that he heard, but it was

actually in the voice of Eli. So I did like that.

And then I had, I had other things at the time, but that was

basically it to let me know, you know, that your dad is the

anointed man of Madison here, you know, was sent by God and,

you know, and if I don't go and that's the whole thing, you

know, like, you know, I'm going to take Cam up on that deal.

You know, he's paying people and they're leaving.

I'm wondering how much, how much of A check is he writing to get

rid of people, man? You know how many zeros are on

that check, man, you know, But yeah, you know, you, you know,

because you come up with struggles and things that are

happening. You see things you get kind of

mad and that. But God just, you know, told me

like at the end there, you know, you know, without a man of God

in your life, you and your family are going to suffer, you

know, and I know I don't know for now, but that little woman,

I don't know. She, you know, was the

inspiration for Little Debbie Little Snack eggs.

Are you? You're kidding, right?

I'm just, I'm just messing. That one was you had a bowl

because you said, hey, just bake me a little cake.

Yeah, there it is. He's a little dubby.

Stair I have no cream but a little more.

Oh goodness. So have you, have you seen any,

has there been, other than anything we've talked about, any

other big moments in your life that really just confirmed God

to you? You know what I mean?

Anything stand out where you were?

Just like, man, God just came through for me here.

You know what I mean? Well, the only thing I can say

is just for for time, you know, like I said, trying to find a

job, you know, it's not, I never didn't not want to work.

It just couldn't find, couldn't get the break to go through the

door. Man, we first came down here.

It was 10 years. It's like like famine, I'm not

going to lie, man, trying to get on.

Then finally got on out of Toyota and then that changed

everything. And so by going through that

those lean years makes me thankful and appreciative of

what's happening now. Not to be wasteful or what have

you, but to, to know there was a time when this happened through

me just still, I like I said, I still worship and praise even

through those bad times. God brought me out to where now

I can have nicer things but still live for him.

And that's the main thing, you know, for some people, maybe if

you got $2,000,000 and you were able to retire, what have you,

would you still go to church? Would you still praise God?

Because if you're not, you know what, that's not a good thing

for you to have. And so that's not at all.

That's how you got to got to look at it.

You know, like I said, you know, if you offered me a mansion with

Ferraris and Lamborghinis and a pool and a little, you know,

lazy river in the back, Hey, that sounds great.

But if by having that I no longer go to church, no longer

pray or what have you, then that's going to separate me from

God and the end of it is going to be horrible for me.

I mean, you see that in the Old Testament, right?

The children of Israel, they didn't really lose God when they

were struggling. They lost God whenever the when

they were peace, when it was blessings, you know.

Yeah, so you just got to try. Like I said, say in life, I try

to learn from other people's mistakes so you don't have to

suffer yourself through them. You know, You know, just like

you said, you know, when you're growing up, I think your daddy

instead of two, you know, once your dad beats you once, you

know, you don't want to do that again.

And if you keep doing it, you keep getting beat, you know,

that's a slow learner. You know, You know, I try to.

I want to learn quickly, not that to avoid all that, I'm

going. To I'm going to take his back

again to when you when you first got baptized in that whole

situation. I'd like to put a little bit

more of an emphasis on your mindset for when you realized

what was required for salvation and you you made that a

priority. And that's something that I

don't think it's preached about a lot, but I don't think people

really take it to heart. I don't think people have that

same mindset anymore. Just just that that mindset of

this is required for salvation. If I don't get it, every day is

a a fear. It was a fear and I'm not, I'm

not going to lie. I mean, like I said, you know,

when they tell you if we can go any kind of war, they're going

to attack this ship first. You know, I'm thinking I don't

need that. If I do that, I'm going to be

lost for eternity, you know, and that's the bottom line.

I saw it. He didn't he didn't harp that on

me. I saw that.

And I said, hey, is this what this means?

And he said, you know, yes, that's what that means.

You know, it's just kind of going to go to school.

You know, you got to get at least a 65, you get a 64, you

fail. I don't want to be there at that

age like that, you know, and and that's where I was at that point

because I didn't fulfill those obligations.

So it, it was fear, you know, you know, some people, they say,

well, you shouldn't have the fear of the Lord put you into

salvation, but it did, you know, I don't want to be in the lake

fire. You know, 80° is hot and

miserable to me. You know, anything more than

that, it's just actually excruciating.

You know, I don't, I don't need that.

You know, it's not comfortable. Yeah, so it went north.

So that's in there like that. But I will say also, it just

dawned on me about my family and that just with fasting, I hate

to fast, I'm not going to lie about it, but I went through a

period where I was fasting and when I did, it opened up the

door to where I gave my sister, my mom and my dad a Bible study.

My dad actually got the Holy Ghost and my sister and my mom

because my wife was with me when I was giving it.

They're like, wow, there's like a glow around you when you're

when you're talking to us. So I don't know what they saw,

you know, but they didn't act upon it.

See, that's was the disappointing thing.

They didn't act upon what my dad did, but then walked away.

So it's not just getting it and then that's the end of it.

It's not a once saved, always saved thing.

You got to keep at it. And we're living in a time right

now to where when I read the Bible, you know, it's like, man,

it is, it is it pre Trib, post Trib, mid Trib, you know, 'cause

you like, I'm not for sure. I'm not taking a chance with

that. OK.

Right now I'm seeing things that I would have never imagined in

my life that I'm seeing with the, the immorality that's going

on in this country alone. And to me, I'm just like, if it

keeps going, God, you're going to have to repent what you did

to Sodom and Gomorrah for what's happened right here in the good

old USA. This is Terry.

And so I was telling my wife the other day, you know, the Bible

says this wasn't the days of Noah.

You had to eating drink and being married.

They're all having a good time. But were there other clues or

what else was going on in the days of Noah to find out how

close are we? You know, I feel like we're in

the last of the last days. I do feel like that and I do

feel like I'm my generation or us right here.

We're going to hear that trumpet sound.

I just can't see this world keep going on the way that it is and

it not happen, you know, with the signs.

And, you know, I'm a, I'm a discovery YouTube junkie kind of

guy, document documentary stuff. And I started seeing how the,

the Jewish people are starting to go up on the Temple Mount.

Now they're, they're starting right out.

So yeah, they're, they're the Red Hat for the sermon.

All this stuff all happening. You know, who's to say that God

don't come before that temple's built?

Yeah, I'm not going to gamble that, you know, you know, like

you said, like on that one YouTube.

Yeah. September 23rd, the rapture's

coming. Yeah.

Actually, I knew that was a lie because the Bible says no man

knows the day or the hour and which the Son of Man cometh.

So I knew that was a lie. But you know.

Get your thinking. You know, it was, you know, I

mean, his intent and everything and being on a Jewish holiday

and stuff like that. I mean, it sounded good, you

know, But then the whole thing is, you know, what happens if

it's not there but it's still. The next day.

Yeah, you just don't know. I I can't, I can't gamble the

fear of not making heaven to to endure and suffer all that you

have up to this point in life. There's good times and bad

times, you know, I can't lose out eternity with God for to go

through all of what I've gone through, sacrifice and

everything not to make it. Yeah, yeah.

And thank God He got His Spirit in us to keep us right, to keep,

to hold us to, to, to make us give us that strength to

persevere and keep going through.

All yeah, you're, you're going to you know, I when I read the

one scripture where it says, you know, Satan's given the power

and authority to wear out the Saints, I'm like, how we how how

we going to survive. But what I'm seeing now what

he's doing to wear the Saints out.

It's all in your mind is the anxiety and stuff.

It's the business of life and the stress.

And that I read a stat that's pretty staggering as far as like

young girls, girls between the age of 12 and 16, one out of

three of them either have thought about or have committed

suicide. And I'm thinking, what is a

young girl between that age so stressed out about that you're,

you're thinking about ending your life or even doing it.

And then like, even people in the church, the Saints, you

know, the pressure of this, that keeping that mind, you know, and

that's sometimes where you're so tired.

Yeah. You know.

And and 1st Thessalonians chapter 4 tells us make it your

ambition to lead a quiet life. And I look at a guy like you and

I think you're a shining example of that like you haven't haven't

pushed to be in the limelight or anything and you just steadily

working serving the Lord. You know, nowadays, though, I do

think the morality that you brought up, I think Batman said

that the darker the night, the lighter the light, right?

And I, I do think you'll see a pool, not to pull from Pastor

Bruce Wayne over there too much, but I think you'll see a pool

from that. And I think now is our time

because you said, you know, like you don't want to be missed in

that. And so for me, it's like, OK, if

we're securing our salvation, that's fine.

But what about our neighbors? You know, if we're thinking,

hey, at any moment now, who knows?

And then we're at a spot where, hey, there's a lot of souls in

our city that we could go out. And I think that Dollar General

story where you said too, I worry about the moments I've

passed up like that where it's just a casual thought where I'm

like, oh, you should turn right or left or oh, you should go in

there. What, not, or talk to somebody

because a lot of times we're not good at that taking that

opportunity. And that says a lot about your

character obeying to take a weird route and then go to

Dollar General for for no reason, essentially.

And who knows if that planted that seed in either one of those

people. The cashier, the the girl, her

mom, her family. You never know.

Yeah, like I say, you don't. You don't want to do that.

I was just even like with the penny, you know, when she was

going through that, she threw the chemo and she lost her hair

and everything and just got and, you know, I told me, you know,

you go out there and you tell her, you know, you're, you're,

you're not a survivor. You're a conqueror survivor.

A survivor is just someone you made it only because that

situation dissolved and went away.

A conqueror is someone, while that's going on, you're still

striving and staying on top of it.

And I said, and for your hair, I said, just like it was with

Samson, you're going to have a, a new covenant with God.

It's going to be stronger, you know, and you don't have to

worry about that hat or what have you.

And, you know, she's like, and it meant so much and I didn't

want to wear this hat anymore. But, you know, I didn't know all

that stuff. Yeah.

You know, she started, she told me other things.

I won't disclose whatever. But it's just like, at first,

one press on me is like, oh, man, if if you do this and and

you're nowhere in the ballpark. Yeah, you're, you're going to,

you're, you're going to be humiliated.

That's the whole thing. I think that's what kind of like

the devil wants to play in. You don't do that.

You know, you're going to look stupid.

You know what's God going to think about you now when you out

there doing something dumb like that?

And so you, you reserve yourself and you hold back, but you've

missed a blessing to be 1. When that happens, then I

rejoice inside because I heard from God and I did the right

thing. So all right, man, I heard, Let

me know I heard from God. God's using me, you know, And

that's how I always look at it. That's how I want to be.

If you don't mind, I'm sorry, I had a question the the ups and

downs of life. See, I'm, I'm 30, I've got two

kids and I know that life's not just going to be smooth sailing

the rest of the way. Did you ever hit a point if you

don't, if you don't mind talking about it, where you kind of like

strayed some and it was difficult living for God And

then what was it that brought you back if you if you ever hit

that time? There there were times in that,

like, like I said, for the job I had, you know, when it when it

says, you know, you got more months than you do have money.

You know, it's like you got paid this Friday, but I need the

check from two weeks from now to still pay for these, you know,

bills right here. You know, how you going to do it

and and during this struggle, you know, living for God, you're

like, I honestly, when I look back at how did I have the money

to make that and I don't, I don't know, but somehow God made

it happen. You know, and I think back like,

hold on man, this doesn't make no sense.

I only brought in 800. My house payment was 700 I

think. How did I make it?

I don't remember going to give me any money, you know, no one

wants to offer money, you know, But yeah, it, it gets like that,

you know, it's like God, you know, and that's why you just

gotta keep praying, you know, Lord, you know, I always look

like too, you know, I, I acknowledge the fact that I am

vulnerable and we, I can't, I can't do it on my own.

I don't have it. I don't have the ability to, to

do it. I'm dependent on you, Lord, and

that's been my, my mindset for the whole whole ride here.

I know that I can't go out and be someone famous or whatever.

I know that, you know, everything I ever put my hand on

I've, I've actually failed at school using an Honor Society

and what have you. Wasn't great going to the Marine

Corps. You know, they all thought I was

good, but I didn't consider myself great going to the gym

and never excelled to be Mr. Olympia.

Nothing like that. Everything, everything,

everything that I try to put my my heart into it.

I failed, you know, so that's why I'm just like I, I'm giving

up range of control and I just try to listen.

What do you want me to do? God everyday, you know, put into

me, show me. So I mean, I just, I'd look for

everything, man. I have a bumper stickers I

listen to just like, you know, like giddy and I I go listen to

the enemy and what are they saying?

You know, whatever to pick up, you know, for God to talk to me

that this is the direction I need to go.

But it is, it is rough like that when you go through times like

that. But once you go through it one

time and God pulls you through and now it's no big deal.

I've been through this before. This is what happens, you know,

just to say about the storm, say, OK, rain's going to come,

the wind's going to beat down. You know, I might have to put

some siding up if the fence came down or what have you.

But all right, I already did it once and do it against no big

deal. Now I don't.

I don't panic over that now. One thing he told me was that

during those rough times that you had that what was looking

back at it, One thing you realize was that you were very

you got closer through the hardship to the Lord because you

realized you had to rely on him like you knew you had to rely on

him. And you realize that that meant

that you were getting closer to him then if you didn't have to

rely on him. Yeah, that's like I said that

that that all just comes through experience like that.

That's why I'm just kind of glad that it didn't become famous or

anything like that. Because sometimes you always

wonder, man, what happened? If I would have made this

decision earlier in life, I could avoid it this way.

And then you don't know what path you would have travelled

down to that way that could have took you further away.

And so everything that's come my way has been for a reason, for a

purpose, to build character, to draw me closer.

So I don't, I don't ever at the time, I, I, I get mad, certainly

frustrated and why is this happening or whatever.

But I've learned even, I guess it's from the job.

I'm not going to curse God. I'm not going to blame God ever

for anything that happens. You know, I'm, I'm not, I'm

smart enough not to do the fear of the Lord is the beginning of

wisdom. I'm smart enough not to do that.

And so with that, the only person that can help me is the

Lord. So why would I want to do

anything where his hand is against me?

It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of a living God.

And I go by that model and try to live by that model.

That's where that's where we're at.

So you're you're for your bloodline, your first

generation, so to speak, Pentecostal will say that.

What, what kind of feeling does that give you to look out at

church and see not only me on the platform, but you see like

your grandson clapping and being in that environment.

To know that it started with you, that.

Boy's a trip to. He's a dancer.

The other day, yeah, he got out in the aisles and was clapping

and raising his hands. I think it was Paul that said

that I have no greater joy than to see my children walking in

truth and that that that is it. That's why for my life I I want

for you to see in my life like God has blessed him to put him

in that it God has done that and for you to trust into the God

that I serve just like his God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob,

each generation to be able to see that God blessed him God

work through him to survive and and you know, and for you to

rely on that God like I did. That's why I wanted.

So, yeah, it does be in the first generation to see

generations after me to follow in those footsteps.

It's, you know, it's encouraging, inspiring, because

like I said, I'm not always going to be here.

You know, unfortunately, the Bible says your average life is

70 years. I got about 11 years to go on

average. You know, it could come sooner.

I don't know. But to know that you're safe and

you've got a relationship with God to count on him, you need to

understand it's, it's not me that allowed.

It is God that allowed this to happen, to put this so that you

can experience that as well. And so that's the joy that I get

out of it. Yeah.

Because there's, there's, there's 5 John Bosings.

I'm the fifth. You're the 4th, So 3 John

Boastings came and went before God, really, as far as we know,

before God really kind of went out of his way to said, boy, get

on that boat. I'm about to show you something.

Yeah, I mean, you just know. I mean you, you never know.

Like like Bible says to only God knows the heart of man.

Even even yourself, you don't know how even you know.

I always say to man, Lord, I don't know who, what where I

would be if it wasn't for you, because if I didn't have this

hope of heaven and to be able to make it, I could be acting just

like the rest of them out there, you know, but there's no

consequences. Yeah.

Give me your wallet, buddy. No, you know, I'm yeah, you

don't have 5 bucks here, man. And what I spent more, more on

the bullets in it, you know, you know, you could find very easily

being that morally depraved as the rest of this world.

And that's why I got to try to in my mind when I encounter

people. And that is to understand, you

know, what they're not serving the master that I, I served.

That's why they behave the way that they do.

And, and sometimes I don't see them like, man, why you acting

like that? You know, but they're, you know,

you're serving one or the other, either either the God or Satan.

And, and what people don't understand is, is when Satan

took the Lord up there to the mountain, showed him everything,

said, I can give you all this, OK, He still has that authority

and power to do that. And you have people you see,

like like even Bob Dylan, I said and all that I said that guy

Can't Sing man. And he admitted on a a

documentary he sold his soul. He called him the to the chief.

I was, you know, to Satan and he would go like under a trance

when he wrote wrote the music. It wasn't him, but it was the

demonic spirit that, you know, possessed him.

And so Satan has that when you look like.

Yeah. And.

And you find out too, why all these people too?

You know, a high suicide rate is among them.

Like Hollywood now you're thinking, these people got

everything. How could life be stressful for

you? You got money to pay and buy for

everything. No, they're unhappy.

They don't have the Lord. So there's an unhappiness there.

You know, the Bible kind of tells us that we're all like,

you know, we kind of come from God and we're meant to return to

God, basically. And so each of us is missing

something inside, you know what I mean?

Yeah. The Void.

And so, you know, you see that and you see these people who try

to fill it with all these things, but it really doesn't

get satisfaction, does it, you know?

Yeah, it's just, it's sad. So I got to try to keep that,

you know, in mind when I out there interacting with them

that, you know, they don't have what I have.

And so then, you know, whenever you can share that with

somebody, you know, it's just another seed planet.

They said we, we got limited time here and it's over.

You know, I don't want to see anybody go to the lake of Fire,

you know, so I said, we're spiritual firefighters.

We got to try to pull, try to pull them up, try to pull them

out of there before that happens.

One thing that I, I've always appreciated of how you raised me

and, and have been as far as a father figure for me as the

difference between, I'm not trying to bash on your dad, but

I think that kind of shows the difference in the importance of

a father, just a, a father figure, but one that's also

faithful as far as in their religious belief for their

family. You, you grew up with someone

who wasn't involved and didn't prioritize those things.

And the difference that it made is that you had to find all that

stuff on your own. You didn't have the help, but

for us, because of the example you set, I could theoretically

say I, I grew up in this religion, whether or not I

always personally was fully invested into it.

That's that's on me. But I was able to grow up and

knowing what the truth was and having someone to go to to to

ask those questions when I didn't know when you had the

experience or the wisdom that I didn't have.

What could you do? You think that there's a what?

What value do you put on that as far as from your perspective of

being able to know that you made a difference and how you were

going to raise your family versus the people who came

before you and the importance of a father who cared enough to

make sure that his family was where they needed to be.

Yeah. When you look at like statistics

and that too you can, you can see that single mother homes

where there is no father net involved.

The children, you know, I hate to say it, but become part of

the alphabet community and they they have a hatred for men.

And I guess when you get all your direction from the woman

instead of the man, that's not how God set it up.

So it's already dysfunctional. And so when the father's not

there, that's the God, God's blessing isn't going to flow.

It's supposed to go from him to the man to the woman to the

kids. And when that element is out of

there, it becomes dysfunctional. And so then that's when these

young men begin to even sometimes hate their mom and be

misogynist and become criminal active, you know, because they

don't have a father figure there to, you know, say no, this is

these are the consequences of this stuff.

You don't have that guidance there.

Then you fall into that sort of environment, which is what you

see in in this world. You know, even for like for a

man, OK, we're supposed to love our wife like Christ loved the

church. We and what he do, he died for

the church. So having a father there,

especially one that would would be godly or want to want to obey

the Lord and fulfill his will, it's going to make a tremendous

difference in your society, where you're at and where you

go. And what's terrible when you

look at over all the civilizations, you know, you,

you wonder, how did Babylon fall?

How did Roman fall? You know, the Persians, Greeks,

how did all this happen? It all ended up coming down to

immorality. That's what destroyed their

civilization. And I see that even now.

Your, your father even told me, you know, things that are going

on. He said.

Do you know that? This whole alphabet community

stuff, he said. That's only 3% of our population

and you're so disgusted with it now at 3%.

Yeah, morality's falling a lot of ways.

And I think also masculinity, like you said, and masculinity

isn't it isn't some, you know, tough, Oh, I'm going to beat all

my kids or what not, you know, and I think that's for you.

What's impressive with you stepping in, not even having

that example and say, you know what, I'm changing our future as

a family, you know, because now you have him being a father to

his son. And I'll say with the kids too.

That's what changed my perspective because before I'm

like, I'll just figure it out, you know, to me, we'll we'll

figure it out. But then when you have that

responsibility and then you, you accept it as a man and go in and

say, you know what, I have a deeper responsibility to God and

to my family now to change me some.

And I, I think that's where the masculinity you've showed

through your whole story that you were able to be broken and

then God flowing through you through your family.

I'm striving to do that everyday.

I think children are a blessing in a, in a way, and the fact

that when they're growing up, you know, you make mistakes and

what have you, and then that gives you more of an

understanding on how your heavenly Father deals with you.

You could have one child who's like, you know, Dad, give me

this, give me that, this ain't good enough.

This ain't, you know, this, that and the other.

Then you have another child that, you know, all of a sudden

they're packing your favorite snack to your lunch, telling

you, I love you. This, that other, which one are

you going to? You know which one?

You know, you're not supposed to pick favorites, but obviously

the one who appreciates everything that you do is going

to make you work harder to make them happy.

I've learned that, you know, as a father.

And so that's why everybody too. I'm thankful roof over my head,

clothes on my back, food on the table.

I'm thankful for this is just some of the small things that

I'm aware that you got. You know, I'm not even aware of

all that you do, but I am so thankful for what a little I do

know that, yeah, you're worthy of praise and I'm going to give

it. And that's where I live.

Amen. All right.

I don't know if you guys got anything more right an hour and

a half. Just one thing I tend to ask

everybody at the end is just kind of like, what's a lesson

that God's kind of taught you through your life and something

you could pass on to others, you know?

I was happy. I just happened to say the

biggest lesson in my life is that even through the hard times

and what have you, always stay faithful and and trust in God.

Don't waver on that. No matter what the fate looks

like. Don't your values, your

character, do not let them diminish under the circumstance.

Don't let that happen. You know God will see you

through it. We don't know how or when it's

going to place. That's what makes it awesome.

You know, that's what makes a miracle a miracle.

A situation is totally impossible that you can't take

care of. You know you can't take care of

it. And then when it happens, then

you can rejoice. Overlook what God has done for

me. So that would be my greatest

lesson out of life, You know, always trusting God no matter

what the situation is.