FREEDOM SUMMER SERIES: Freedom From Comparison, Tiffany Souers

Thank you, babe. All right. I do wear

many hats. I have been here for the

beginning. So, it's okay, Matt. You

didn't know my title. I don't even care

about the title. But, um, I am the

community pastor. I have been here since

we started 10 years ago. And I feel like

I have the same sermon every time. Um,

all my sermons will be the same. It'll

be either how can we just come into the

presence of God and let him minister to

you or how can we come as a body and be

the best fullest body that we can be. So

community pastor kind of means a lot to

me because I really really care about

the community and I it just actually I

don't feel as nervous just looking out

because I'm like oh yay it's you here we

are. So, I got a text yesterday from

Christian and Sue who were in Norway

watching the Norwegian again. Did you

guys watch this game?

>> They Okay. How World Cup people here?

We've got World Cup people.

Yes. Okay.

I also have become a World Cup person. I

feel uh this is really weird for me

because I am really not a sports person

and

In high school, I played lacrosse and I

would either get in trouble for like

talking to my friends that were on the

other team or I would be get my feelings

hurt because people would try to jab me

with their sticks when the refs weren't

working. And I was like, that's not the

rules. And so I'm actually not a sports

person, but I have two boys that love

soccer and I've watched them play soccer

all these years. And I watched these

like, you know, little kids, they're so

cute, like looking got to hit it in the

goal and then but all of them really the

focus is just how can I how can I get

this ball in that goal and I don't

actually care about my team. I just want

that goal and if I could just get a goal

I will feel so good about myself and

when I'm watching the World Cup I think

what makes me just so amazed is how they

work together because they truly are a

team. I feel like they really are in it

to to win, but they know they can't win

individually. They have to win together.

And so it's been so fun for me. And what

you know, I have my preferences, but um

for today, I will not say Argentina

though I do like I just saying I'm a

little Latina inside and

Mexico I kind of like too.

I do kind of like the Spain was so into

Spain. Anyway, but that not not not

we're going. Um, no distraction, but

basically what I love is how all the

teams, no matter where you're from, they

are working together and they are going

after a sim similar goal. And then I

love the fans and I think that's

probably why the like Latinos like I

just feel like their fan support is so

amazing and they're just like screaming

and crying and dancing because they're

if their team wins it's their victory

and I just feel like that is the point

that is like number one point of my

whole sermon. If our team wins, we

experience the victory together. And I

just love seeing that in the body. And I

love seeing that in our church. And I

have been here since the beginning. And

I've seen this body come together in so

many ways. And it's not about an

individual. It is always about what God

is building for the kingdom, which is

way outside of these walls. It's all

over the entire world and he's building

something and we all get to be a part of

the victory. And we also see in these

World Cups that there's a tears when

you, you know, don't make it and they

put so much energy and heart and these

fans are spending thousands and

thousands of dollars to get there and

when their team doesn't make it, they're

sad. And I just feel that is also a

picture of our kingdom. When our team is

we're sad and so we just come together

and encourage each other in our on our

winds and our sad moments and I really

feel that is so as I

I've just been praying over Lord what do

you want me to share with our body I

feel like I wanted to bring up something

that I see so beautifully already

happening here and then I also just

wanted us to just be aware of some

little teeny seeds that kind of get in

there and then kind of fester a little

bit and then start growing if we don't

catch them. And so one of my favorite

things is to read the letters in the bo

in the Bible to the church because I'm

in a church and so I really care about

what is Paul telling the church? What

are what's John telling the church? What

who what's Jesus telling the church?

Where are we learning about the church

through the scripture, through the word?

And I've been reading I am in a Bible

challenge, Suzanne, because whenever you

need to do a challenge, you ask Suzanne

because she is like master of challenges

and she will be on it and then you feel

like, oh yeah, I gotta get this. I gotta

do this. And so, um, we're just reading

through the scriptures. Anyway, but I've

been I got kind of stuck in James and I

just was like, "Dang, James, like you

just kind of take it I mean it's John,

but um you take it from

Jesus's half brother wrote James. Um but

you take it from he has this way of

taking things that we all hear like our

words are powerful.

Love the poor. Love the orphans and

widows in our city. love. Um, don't show

favoritism. He like takes things that

were like, "Yeah, we're Christians. We

know this." But then he like takes it

from the head and then he goes deeper

and then it starts to hit the heart and

then you're like, "Oh my gosh." So

whenever I feel like I'm super

Christian, I just read James and I'm

like, "Oh, not super Christian." Um, I

actually Jesus, I'm so sorry. Um, but

I am going to talk about I'm gonna go

through James. I'm just going to read a

couple verses, but I feel like uh James

talks a lot. I just think he takes

theories from like what's going on in

his culture and what is so prominent in

his culture and in the church. And then

he just takes it and he's like, "This is

really what matters." And I think his

culture is really similar to our culture

in a lot of different ways about like we

really value success and we really value

education and we value looking good and

eloquent speech and we value

uh performance like just being the best

at what we can be and those are not bad

things. But when they start to trickle

in to a church, then we have to become

really really aware of what is the Bible

saying and then what is Jesus saying or

what is the scriptures saying? What is

the Bible saying? What is Jesus saying?

And what is our culture saying? Because

it it can kind of feel intertwined

at times if we're not too careful. And

so when I was reading, I felt like he

just said it so beautifully like True

religion is this. He's like, listen up.

True religion is this. Taking care of

widows and orphans in their distress

and not getting polluted by the world.

And those two things,

he's caring for the vulnerable and the

powerless in our culture. And that I

don't see up front. Everyone saying

like, "Yay, good job. You're caring for

least of these in our community and I

you're being a solution for the least of

these in your community. It's not

publicized as much because it's hard and

it painful and it takes a lot of the

Holy Spirit to love in a way that can

love and change the widows and the

orphans and all that's going on the

vulnerable and the powerless in our

community. It takes Jesus's kind of love

to help that situation.

But what the part that I didn't I want

to talk about today is not deluded by

the world. And when he in James, it kind

of goes this through this sequence,

right? He's talking first about how

powerful our words are. If we worship on

a Sunday, but then we curse people or we

just say negative things about people

behind their back or we show favoritism,

then who are you? Like, how do you do

that? How do you worship and then curse

behind people's backs? And then he talks

about how powerful the tongue is and how

the tongue is like a fire and it can

just take out a whole community and that

just is real in a fire community that we

have experienced that. And then he goes

into but what is actually true wisdom?

What does it look like to actually be a

community together? And I'm gonna read.

He says there's two kinds of wisdom.

James 3:13,

James 3:13

"Who is wise and understanding among

you? Let him show it by his good life,

by deeds done in humility that comes

from wisdom." But if you harbor any envy

and selfish ambition in your hearts, do

not boast about it or deny the truth.

Such wisdom. There's not

my eyeballs.

Bless the eyeballs.

Oh my gosh. This is the first time.

Don't get my glasses. I could do this.

Okay. Um

I'm sure it's on the screen behind me,

but no. Uhuh. I am in denial of my

eyeballs.

I I totally got this. Okay. S I'll just

back up.

This is like okay

great it's on screen. Such wisdom does

not come from heaven and earthly or

unspiritual as the devil. For when you

have every envy and selfish ambition

there you will find disorder

and every evil practice. Okay, I'm just

going to talk about the disorder. I've,

you know, we have a really powerful

intercessory team that meets on

Wednesday mornings at 7 am if anyone's

interested right here. Uh, but you know,

over the course of the last couple

months, we've really gone after order.

Like I just I keep feeling it. I keep

hearing it. Divine order, divine order,

divine order. And I'm realizing part of

what is against divine order is when

there's chaos and division, when there's

little seeds of comparison, of

competition, of jealousy. And I can say

this to you because I've been here 10

years and I have had to work through

this all the time. It's a lifestyle for

me sadly. Um, but I'm getting so much

stronger and so much I mean I'm even

doing this sermon. I was like, whoa,

thank God. you do do things in us, you

know, um because I I don't feel like I

struggle as much as I did, but I still

struggle. So, it's it's just something

worth paying attention to. It's

something worth talking about as a

community because I think that's one of

our biggest strengths is our community.

And I want to just highlight what God

calls community. He says, "But the

wisdom that comes from heaven is first

of all pure

and then it's peaceloving

and it's confident

and submissive and full of mercy and

good fruit

and sincere

doesn't have favoritism.

They're peacemakers

who sow peace

and raise a harvest of righteousness

and that is this church. I have seen

this and I'm in charge of the community

groups and coaching the community group

leaders and being a part of the

community group leaders and I do really

want our community group leader hosts to

expand and to grow with our church. But

what I want even more is that our

leaders are healthy and that our groups

are healthy. And I can confidently say

we have beautiful leaders.

Beautiful leaders. Always very good. But

these are people not perfect. These are

people

living their own very busy lives,

financially stretched in different ways,

just like all of us. And yet they care

more about

the church, the growing, the body,

themselves, more than themselves, and

what satisfies them and what's best for

them. And I'll just even say Suzanne,

she she's getting highlighted a lot

today. Um, but she, for example, was in

a community group and she loved her

community group. It was a great

community group. I mean, they were

running together for multiple years,

thriving,

but she just felt in her heart like,

"No, I want everyone to be a part. I

want more people to be a part." And I

can see in this command group, it is so

full. And that we cannot have more

people coming in here as much as we

would want to say yes to all the people.

We're just literally already max. I

think you had like 25 or something in

that group. And so, she just decided to

open her in her home just with a whole

new community group of new people. And

then I've just been able to see little

like lots of glimpses from each

community group. and I'm just

highlighting hers, but I could talk

about every group of ways that you've

shown up for people and move helped them

move or given them a meal or you've

invited your co-workers into your um

community so they could feel what it's

like to be with people that are

believing in ways that are slightly

different, actually a lot different than

our culture. And so I can proudly say we

have community here in this body that is

truly authentically

living here. I am not perfect. I'm not

made to be perfect. You are made to be

perfect. Jesus, take my weaknesses. Take

my imperfections.

Take my heart and my selfishness at

times and Lord, use it. And then God is

and he's doing in every group and it's

not friend groups. Some groups are

friends because of life stage, because

of community. After years, you become

friends. But some groups, it's truly

they're coming together because they

have one goal, one mission, and that is

we would like to talk about Jesus and

our lives with you. And we'd like to

share our lives with somebody else. And

we're going to do this together. And you

might have different stages and life

stages and ages and everything. But that

is the body. That is the community of

God coming together.

And when I have seen again it almost

when I started here it was basically

just a community group in a living room.

Christian Sue couple others Liz Hill was

there and Ellie and others but um we

were just a small community group. And

then I watched us grow. And then I

watched myself and I watched myself

starting to compare and I watched myself

starting to be jealous and I lost I saw

myself being selfish and having some

selfish mo motives like well what about

me? Did you see me? Did you did you

think about me? And I noticed some of

the me coming in instead of the us. What

are we building? What is God doing?

Where where's our mutual victory? Where

are we passing the ball to one another

so that we can go further together?

Where is my weakness being strengthened

in somebody else? And as I started to

see all of my own stuff, I had to be

really honest with God. I had to be

really real.

And that's messy

because those are the moments where

you're like, "These are my best friends

and I'm running with them and I love the

church and I believe in the church and

I'm comparing with them or I'm jealous

of them or I'm doing I'm selfishly

wanting this my way." And I started to

see that in me. And I had to stop and I

had to go to the Lord and I had have him

redefine me. I had to have him tell me,

"What do I really want?" And when James

talks about that here, he's like, "What

is all this quarreling among you? What's

the arguing?

Do you not know what you want? Are you

not asking what you want?" And I

realized, oh yeah, I know. I I do want

some of these things. And I had to be

grieve about it because you don't get

what you want all the time. You get what

you get and you make the best out of it.

Um, and I have a beautiful life and I

love my life and I praise God for my

life. But there's still a process where

you have to be honest

with disappointment. If things are not

going as you please, but then that

person that you love so so much is it's

going great for them. And because there

will be a time when it's not going great

for them and you need to walk with them

and you now know what it means to

receive compassion and comfort from God

so that you can walk with them when it's

not going as planned and then you can be

like, "We're going to do this and we're

going to do this together." And

so I feel like the first killer of

community, which not in this community,

but in you know out there everywhere, um

is when we are not honest with what we

want. And I think we got to just do that

and grieve that. And I love Ann Lamont.

She Oh, no. Okay. Is one person, but

that's not who I have here. Um

and Vas.

Where is it? Notes.

It's behind me though. I'm sure.

Oh, it's not behind me. Okay. Um Okay.

Yeah, I know. Okay. Her name, but I just

want to get her quote.

Um this is 18 pages.

I'm not gonna talk your ear out. Don't

worry. I've already went through like 10

of these. So, we're good. It's just how

I work out things with the Lord. I like

to just hear and then write and then

hear and then read and then put it all

together. Okay. So, here we are. I love

Van Vos Ann Voscamp. I love what she

says. She says, "Lament is a cry of

belief in a good God. A God who has his

ear to our hearts. A God who

transfigures the ugly into beauty.

Complaint on the other hand is the

bitter howl of unbelief

and any benevolent God in this moment. A

distrust in the love

beat of the father's heart.

If we are not honest and we are not real

with the Lord,

we are no longer grieving. We are just

complaining. And when you're complaining

and complaining, that is part of the

fire that starts to spread in your

family, with your kids, with your

co-workers,

in our church. But when we're honest

with what we don't like and how we

didn't like it being done or we would

have done it a different way because it

will be in a different way, we will be

offended. We will think we know better.

But when we take this to the Lord, let

him tell me, "What do you want me to

know? What do you want me to know? What

does your scripture say?" Then we we

cried it out, talk it out, yell it out,

whatever. And then we become lamenting.

And then the lamenting comes comfort.

And then the comfort comforts others.

And it benefits everyone. not just

yourself.

The second tool that I feel the little

thing I want to go after to try to

combat this jealousy, this little bit of

competition, this little bit of

comparison happening inside of us. It's

happening throughout all generations.

That's why it's said multiple times in

the letters to the church. So don't feel

bad. It's just part of us. So we just

have to be real. And then the so the

second thing that I found really helpful

is we just have to get back to the word

because the word is not like the world.

It's not like our city at all. And the

more I read it, the more I realize, oh,

this is what you say about me. So in the

first one, we're comparing because we

don't get what we want. But in the

second one, we're comparing because of

our personhood. We don't like our

personhood. Our personhood is not

fitting in the box. It's like that

person got a promotion at work and I

didn't I need they're need to change or

I need to change because I didn't get

the promotion or I'm at school with my

friends and they're popular and I'm not

so I need to change so that I can have

what they have. But it's more of a

person you're dealing with the

personhood. And I think as a leader I

have really

gone through my journey of what kind of

leader am I? And I have had the

beautiful privilege of working side by

side with Christian and Sue and other

leaders here. Be Phil Megan I mean Karen

many many leaders do when she was here

there were so many beautiful leaders and

I had to find what kind of leader I am.

I am a shoulderto-shoulder. Let's do

this together. I'm gonna tell you what I

know. You tell me what you know and then

let's kind of make the best out of it. I

will not be the one demanding the room

in the way of like listen up you follow

this and you do this. No one listens to

me anyway. I have this high pitched

voice and it's like the kids like I

tried that many times. I no longer kids

church never for me because I like the

youth but the kids it's like they don't

listen they're like yeah yeah yeah I

mean I rile them up have fun but then

when it comes to me telling them what to

do they're like yeah we don't listen I

can't hear you and Sue comes in she's

like and then they're LIKE AND THEN

EVERYONE JUST FOLLOWS AND I'M LIKE

THAT'S so frustrating.

Um, but anyway, there's always going to

be some leader that is better than you

or or you think is better than you or

different than you, but really if we

have this idea of like your victory is

my victory or we're all in the same

team. We're all going the same

direction, then it really changes. It's

not about me and my leadership or lack

of. It's about how God, do you want to

use me here at this time? And it starts

to change. And I feel like it changes

when you can start to hear the truest

identity of what God is saying about who

you are. And he says that in the word

and he he's really good at that. Like

Ephesians, please. I mean, just write

love letters to yourself. I know that's

kind of girly. I'm sorry about the man

brain. I don't know if that help you.

Maybe it would. Um, but it's truth. And

I think Ephesians, Colossians,

Galatians, they're full of truth about

you. What about Jesus? When you're

comparing when I quit my job to be a

mom, oh my gosh, I didn't know I had

worth in my little salary. It wasn't a

big salary, but I had some worth. And I

was making money. I was getting paid.

And I got to use my little fun money

sometimes to do little things like buy

pillows for my cushions. And Clark did

not like that. So, I liked having my

little money, fun money.

But then when I Oh, yeah. When So yeah,

I have many things I like to spend money

on. But um when we were down to one

income and I was just I was investing in

my kids, I I had some serious worth and

value issues because I was like, I'm not

very valuable. I'm not making anything.

And if that is how I judge my value,

then I'm missing that Jesus died. Like

literally gave up his life for my value

and I'm mad because I'm not making very

little amount of money. It was just

Jesus needed to do something deeper in

me and he wanted to call me deeper and

root me a little bit more in what he is

saying. So, I want to speak a few of his

truths over us. I will um I want to

spend the bulk of my end of my sermon on

us as a body, but I don't want to waste

this opportunity. We've been talking

about identity. We will talk about

identity till we're blue in the face

because it is so foundational in how we

are with him and how we are with each

other. No matter what family you grew up

in, no matter what if you're breathing,

you have had a challenge against your

identity. So going back to who does God

say you are is crucial in the formation

work that we're doing with Jesus.

So if you don't mind just closing your

eyes right now, I'm just going to have a

teeny moment with the Holy Spirit. Just

gonna let him speak some love and life

over your truest parts of you.

If this is new to you, just close your

eyes and just hope it goes well. So,

Holy Spirit, I just want to thank you.

Thank you for these ones right here in

this room today for a reason, for a

purpose. And Lord, I just want you to

speak to their truest parts of them

right now. I'm going to speak your

words, truth from your scriptures. And I

just pray that you would touch what they

say, Lord. touch their hearts, Lord.

Thank you that you've made this one in

God's image after your likeness. Thank

you that they are fearfully and

wonderfully made. Thank you that you are

God's workmanship.

You are created in Jesus for good works.

You are a partner of the gospel. You are

worthy of his calling.

You are a laborer of love. You are

steadfast. You are hopeful in the Lord.

You are increasing in the knowledge of

God. You are strengthened with all

power. You are equipped with every good

work. You are self-controlled.

You are peaceful.

You are a light in the Lord. You are a

child of light. You are trained by grace

to renounce ungodliness.

You are an heir according to the hope of

eternal life.

You are

his beloved.

Okay, you can open your eyes.

Just take that in. That is our gospel.

That is way more encouraging than words

from our bosses or our children

sometimes or um you know our friends are

hurting roommates. You know people are

hurting and then they take that little

fire tongue and they just go

cause problems. But we're not a

community like that. We are a community

that is going after a corporate

identity. We are a community that is

going to start and have been thinking

about an us culture and not a me

culture. And I'll just tell you when I

started here

um it was basically a needsbased

situation. So it was like there's a need

I'm there. I I love many many things. So

uh people I love people. And then I felt

like oh I saw some youth Hannah was

here. Um, I don't know where she is.

Anyway, Hannah was a youth at the time

and I'm like, the youth? Who's loving on

the youth? And so I'm like, I will. So

then I was like, the youth pastor. And

actually, I really wasn't. I was just

gathering a few times in my backyard and

loving on the youth. But I say this

because if I were to just say this is my

title

and make that my identity, then I'm

missing a whole lot. And when I I

actually love youth and I used to do a

lot of youth in my all my years since I

was a youth. And if I would have just

stopped and just like I'm taking the

youth, you cannot have the youth. then I

would be missing the growth and

expansion and gifts and joy that all

these people that have come in to pour

into the youth. I I could say this about

every community groups. I could say this

about prayer. I could say this about

missions. I could say this about

preaching. I could say this about

trainings.

All the things. If you're small, you're

doing all the things. You grow. Somebody

else needs to do the things. But you're

holding on like I got to do this stuff.

You're missing an opportunity for Bo and

Abe to to run with our youth, for Megan

to run with our youth. And

I think also

what Clark and I both love youth, but if

our identity is by defined by the

church, like we are the youth people of

the church, we are missing it.

We have youth in our own home.

We have like we have all these public

school kids that are desperate to know

they are important and they are loved

and they are seen. And if I'm like, "Oh,

how am I loving the youth here and I

need to be the youth pastor because I

know all the answers. Holy cow, I am

missing what God is saying right here in

my own home."

And it is hard and painful when you have

a passion and it doesn't fit always.

It is okay to be disappointed. It is

okay to go with the Lord. It is okay to

go back to the word. And it is good to

trust that God has called you. He's

purposed you. He's chosen you. He's

given you that desire. And he will work

it out.

And I can't tell you how many times when

I start to see what he's doing outside

of myself, I cry.

I could cry

because today we have two people here

that are on staff part-time.

But this church is beautiful. It's going

just as planned. The worship is amazing.

The kids are amazing. Everything is just

amazing. It is not about us. It is about

you. Is your purpose

for the team that he has died to bring

to the world. It is so much bigger than

this. This is beautiful.

But oh my gosh, when I hear stories

of Kelly like speaking identity to high

school girls

of how your bodies are made, I might

praise God.

She is using her gifts, her knowledge,

her teaching, and she's creating an

environment in public settings for

people to know a little bit more about

the kingdom. But I could say this about

I mean Lamar, he's invited Ben. Ben's

involved in everything. He's like the

best thing that came to us. Lamar is

just being Lamar. He's in real estate.

He's just talking to people. He's

friendly. He's not like, "Oh my gosh, I

have to have this title." No, he's like,

"I love people."

And then people come here because

they're like, "I like Lamar, so I'm

gonna come here." But I could go down

the roads

and say that over every single one of

you. And I am passionate about this

because we up here or staff will let you

down. I cry about that actually.

I just see people that are working hard

or people that are suffering

or people that are waiting just the

singles

that have wanted to be married and

they're waiting and I cry about that

because it's not as the plan

but it's not up to me.

I can do my part. I can walk with people

and I will.

But

ultimately, you have what you have right

in you. You have the love right here

inside of you. You have comfort inside

of you. You have the word to remind you

truth to remind you that it's not the

values of the world. It is a value of

who am I pleasing now? Is it that guy?

Is it this title or is it Jesus?

And even coming on stage,

I just like

I want to just please you.

That's all.

And I just feel like we will be a really

powerful team

if we catch these little parts of

jealousy, competition, and comparison.

and we just be honest with them and take

them right where God wants to minister

and to love you and to be with you and

to walk with you and to breathe life

into you and to bring hope into you and

to tell you I mean again I'm going to

speak to the singles. I remember this

lie of saying

I these married people are more wanted

than me because I'm single and that is a

lie. That is such a lie. You are so

wanted.

Jesus tells you that.

But I could speak this way to many

people that are hurting and waiting for

this or for that or for children or for

that are out of our control. I don't

understand either.

But as a forming believer, we need to

come back to Jesus and let him take what

we are honestly feeling and show us a

new way. Show us who he is in scripture.

Show us these different leaders. He has

so many different kinds of leaders in

scripture, I'm going to tell you. are so

many different kinds of personalities in

scripture.

It's like, why do we think we have to

look a certain way? Literally, okay,

we've got

Andrew. He's quiet and faithful. We have

Peter. He's a bold leader. I think we

know a couple of those. We have Paul.

He's a deep thinker. Likes to be alone,

but he's with people all the time. We

have Joseph and Daniel. dreamers and

visionaries.

We have artists and craftsmen, business

people like Lydia, female entrepreneurs.

We have doctors, Luke. We have people

using their hands

to build and create and get food. And

that's Peter and James and John. We have

people in government, Matthew and Zak

Zachcharia. Yes. We have uh political

people zealots on all different sides

like Simon.

We have former

persecutors, people that would just tear

up the world, but the Lord

like Paul, but now is like transforming

through generations and generations. We

have former prostitutes like Rahab lived

a life before. We have people with

broken

part past like Mary. We have incredible

high leaders and kings like David. We

have shepherds.

We have prophets. We have mothers Hannah

and Mary. We have young people Timothy

and Josiah. We have older people, Anna

and Simeon. We have people who doubted

Thomas.

We have people who

have given live by great faith in this

church. Such great faith like Abraham.

We have people that are extroverts,

Peter.

And we have people like John who are a

little more contemplative, more

reflective.

It doesn't matter.

What matters is that we're on the same

team. What matters is that your victory

is my victory. What matters is that

people out there can experience what we

have here.

What matters is that when we're

disappointed and people don't show up

for us, they don't bring us the meal,

they don't visit us at the hospital,

they don't give us a cup of cold water.

What do you do then?

You have to go through it. You don't

have to be disappointed. And you ask

God, "What does he think? What do you

know? What does he know?

Holy Spirit, what do you want me to do

about that?"

And then there might be a bit of

forgiveness.

There might be a bit of honest

conversations,

but it's worth it.

You're worth it.

You are so valuable.

you are so important and I was gonna I

just want to share this um

just read the I was reading again and

kind of what community would be like if

we just focused on the values of the

world

instead of community

instead of community focused on the

values of the kingdom.

And so I just want to help you if you

just think of like a little community

group you have. It could be a group of

friends. It could be your family. It

could be a community group you've had

here in the past. And I want you to

imagine in this community if the leaders

or the people inside the group were

like, I'm first build. I'm gonna here to

network. I'm gonna I've got a platform

and you're here to listen. I'm going to

promote myself just going to about

myself the entire group so that you are

here to listen

if if your group was all about comparing

I have a bigger house oh I have this I

have that job oh I don't need anyone I'm

fine I'm here for you actually I'm

actually fine

um what if people were like it's all

about my group my calling my gifts sorry

this group just isn't working for my

gifts and callings So, I'm gonna go

somewhere else. Um, what if it's about

what are you gonna give to me? I'm I'm

busy and I am only here if you have

something to give me. But if you don't,

I I'm like so important. I have other

things to do. Uh, what if it was all

about power and influence, but in a

wrong way? What if it's like, I have the

power of God. I'm gonna pray for you.

You don't have the power of God. What do

you mean? What's wrong with you? How

awful. That'd be terrible. Okay. Um,

what if it was built around yourself,

your life, and your identity,

but in our church, this is actually what

our community groups are built around.

We're not perfect, and we won't let you

down, but we value honest communication

and working through things together.

So, um, but What I truly see in our

communities is the greatest among you

must be your servant. They serve with

humility.

Honor. They outdo one another and

showing honor.

Interdependence.

I need someone too.

The eye cannot say to the hand, I don't

need you. Because the eye and the hand

are very different and they need each

other.

They value others above themselves.

Although they still think they are

valuable, they don't. They're not

doormats just here to serve away till

they die miserably. No, they are

valuable people with a lot going on, but

they choose you and they show up because

you are important. They're tired, but

you are important.

their commitment, their sacrifice,

there's belonging, there's faithfulness.

I see that in my group. The faith to

cheer one another on and the things

unseen

to pray for one another when we it's

just not looking like you want it to

look.

Honor Jesus evaluated children,

the poor, the sick.

That I want to grow in that. I want our

kids to have a place. They have a place

here in our groups. I want them to have

a place. I want them to feel important.

I want to love one another in our

groups. I want to share resources and

responsibility.

And I want us to be okay with

differences

even when it feels uncomfortable.

And I think as I was trying to think of

the best analogy for this um my kids,

you know, when you have Clark and I have

a family and we're like we are the sour

and we've told them that for a long

time. This is what the sour do. The sour

love people. The sour welcome people.

The sour believe in Jesus. Sour um serve

when we're tired. You know, the sours

are this. That sounds great when they're

little, but when they get older. And

then Jaden was um and Tobin. Oh, here

they come. Oh, thank you. I'm talking

about you. Glad you're here. I wonder

where you went. You really should be

here the whole time, but um

I have the mic. I can do this.

Uh okay. So, I'm telling the story,

guys, of when they were in Christian

school, their whole little mini lives

of, you know, three to uh Jaden was

going into sixth grade. And we changed

from this nice, encouraging, loving

school, TDCA, which will be here, to the

public school, which Jaden went from

like three kids in his class of his very

best friends to 33 kids of a public

school in sixth grade. And we're like,

good luck. Um, but that's actually not

what we did. We we should have. But what

we did instead, what I did, Clark's way

better, but I'm like, "Okay, Jaden, you

need to make friends." Okay, sixth

grade, you got to make friends. Just go

in smiling. Like, smile at everyone. How

are you? I like your shirt. Um, smile at

everyone.

Oh my gosh, that would have been

terrible because Jaden, that's not his

personality, honestly. Like, Jaden has

always been a very happy kid. Like as a

baby, he was a very happy kid, but he

was not a smiley kid. Tobin was a very

smiley kid, but Jaden was just Jaden. He

was happy, but it wasn't like he's

smiling at everybody, you see. So when

he went to sixth grade, he was a sour,

but he was him.

And then I was like, "Whoa, that's

awesome. It works." Like you being you

works

because he wasn't smiling to everyone

commenting on their outfits. He was just

him and he met so many friends. And then

the teachers and the friends were like,

"Jaden's a good kid." I like, "Man,

Jaden is trustworthy.

Jaden, I can I want to hang out with

Jaden. Like I feel peace around Jaden.

That's him. He was a sour,

but he looked very different than me as

a sour. Clark is a sour. Tobin also went

into public school. And I want to give a

shout out to him. He told everyone about

Jesus.

And I was so uncomfortable at times

because I I was like, "Oh my gosh, WHAT

DID THEY SAY when you said that? you

guys.

Tiffany, the people pleaser that I'm

like dying to dying to the people

pleaser. Um, but she came out and then

Tom was like, "Yeah, telling about

Jesus." And like, "Whoa, that's amazing.

That is who God made you to be."

But if I was so fixated that they had to

look like me,

my personality, Clark's personality, I

would have missed it.

And I just challenge us, church, to see

what God sees in the people next to you.

To see how we the people in their

spheres to encourage them. If they come

in here grumpy and complaining about

coffee not being ready.

Okay, that's kind of a bummer, but

they're probably pain.

So, if we're so busy just trying to do

the stuff, we miss the hearts. That's

the point.

So, I'm going to close

back to the World Cup example.

Um, I actually there's a commercial in

the World Cup which

you guys if you been watching the

commercial you might have seen it. It's

a it's a commercial about Jesus

and it says

says

wait for it. This is one of those power

pauses. Okay.

It says, "What if you lose for someone

else?" And it shows pictures of like a

dad and a son fighting

and it's like, "What if you lose that

fight to love that person and your

family?" It shows two people shaving

their heads. One I'm guessing has cancer

and then the friend is like, "I'm gonna

shave my head with you because we're

going to do this together.

It's

one soccer player from one team helping

another soccer player from another team

that's injured.

It's people caring for the elderly, the

ones that are lonely in their houses

without anybody.

It's people that are willing to lose

their life

for someone else.

And that's what we are. We have our

victory.

We're living the victory.

And then we are cheering each other on

in the stands.

You got this. I think that's what heaven

is. All the clouds of witnesses are

cheering you on. You got this.

And then we're playing and we're tired

and we want to give up, but we don't

give up because that goal is right

there.

That's us.

And it's so much better when we do it

together.

So, I'm going to close us and I'm going

to just lead us in a time of prayer. And

I'm just going to ask Holy Spirit to

just highlight maybe a teeny seed of

jealousy, a teeny seed of comparison, a

teeny seed of competition.

And I'm just going to let him just, you

know, whatever pops in your head first

thing. And then I'm just going to let

him maybe talk to you a little bit about

that

and then I'm going to

close us and then I'm going to invite

the worship team up if you want to come

up actually

uh and then I'm going to have you just

respond in worship and as you respond

you have two things. You can just praise

him for who he is

or you can have him speak to you. And I

think some of these worship songs, it's

just so crazy the goodness of God and

the writers, but how it really can go

two ways. How we're really there to

worship God. It's always about him, but

then somehow God cares so much about us.

He died for us that he then is like,

"Actually, I want to make it about you

in this moment." And it's beautiful

communion.

And I want to give you freedom to do

that in the way that works. And I one

thing in my church life here is it is

uncomfortable for me. It is when I am

getting touched by the Holy Spirit and

it looks a certain way. It's

uncomfortable.

Uh but I care more

about pleasing him

than I do about pleasing you.

And I know amazing believers here

that are quiet

and they worship with all of them and

they are not shaking or whatever I'm

doing but they are worshiping with all

of their hearts and they are free to be

them and I am free to be me

and you are free to be you

if you're pleasing

So, if you don't mind, just close your

eyes.

We love you, God. We love you.

We love pleasing you.

We love that you see what we don't see.

We love that you call us something that

we

don't see in ourselves sometimes.

We love that we are handto hand with

you. That you are manual with us. God

with us. We love that we have the Holy

Spirit that gives us wisdom. Holy Spirit

that shows us what to do in different

situations.

We love that.

And we ask, Holy Spirit, that you would

come in the way that each one in here

hears you.

We want you to speak to us. We want you

to give us wisdom. We understand that

looks like a lot of different ways.

Maybe it will work here. Maybe it'll

work when you leave

in this week. But we welcome you, Holy

Spirit,

to show us what

Little seed

in us is causing

competition,

comparison, jealousy, selfish ambition

to rain

or speak havoc over you like you're not

enough.

You're never going to make it. You're

not like this.

or pride. I got this. I don't need help.

Whatever that is, no shame, no guilt.

All Christians of all times have dealt

with this.

So, just take that first thing that came

to your mind and then you say, "Jesus,

what do you want me to know?

Maybe he's speaking

life to you. Maybe he's telling you

where it came from. Maybe he's saying

why you have that thought. Maybe you're

not hearing anything. And that's okay.

But let him just minister to you, talk

to you.

We are his sons and daughters. We can

hear his voice by just these thoughts

that pop in our heads.

So, we're going to take that. Lord,

thank you for telling me what you want

me to know. Keep telling me what you

want me to know.

I want to ask specifically if

there's people in this room that just

want something

and they don't have it. I just ask God

that you would bring comfort to them.

I just pray you would bring comfort,

patience, endurance,

strength, self-control,

renewed faith.

Just receive it.

Just receive what he wants to give you

right now. He just wants to give you a

gift for your faithfulness and waiting

and not getting what you didn't want

that you wanted.

Let him love you. Love these ones, Lord.

Love them.

See them. Know them.

And for those that are comparing your

personhood,

it's an identity thing. So I just want

to invite you to just keep asking, tell

me what you see in me.

What do you see in me?

What do you say that I am? Who do you

say that I am?

Show me a picture of my value.

Show me a picture of my worth.

the last group of people.

If you feel uh just like you don't know

where you belong in this family and

that's either here in this church or in

the in the world around you.

I just want God

here that is no judgment

on that. But Lord, what's what do you

want me to know about that?

Holy Spirit, what do you want me to do

in this season?

Seasons change.

What's your assignment in this season?

Thank you, God. As we go into this song,

Holy Spirit, I just pray you would speak

to these ones

as they go into their weak. Speak to

these ones,

Lord. I just thank you

that you are easy to please.

I thank you that we were made in your

image. We were made to be different and

we were made to work in unity.

And Lord, we worship you now in the way

that we were made to worship.