Sermon

Ecstatically Married - Wife-ing

Salt Church

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  1. Genesis chapter 2. Genesis 2 verse 16 and the Lord.

    Genesis 2 chapter mention Genesis 2:16

  2. God commanded. The man saying you may surely

  3. eat of every tree of the garden but of the tree of the knowledge

  4. of Good and Evil. You shall not eat for in the day

  5. that you eat of it. You shall surely die.

  6. Then the Lord God said, it's not good.

  7. That the man should be alone and I will make him a helper fit for

  8. him. Now, out of the ground, the Lord

  9. God, formed every beast of the field and every bird of the

  10. heavens and brought them to the man, to see what he would call

  11. them, and whatever the man called every living creature.

  12. Sure, that was its name. The man gave names to all the

  13. livestock to all the birds of the heavens and to every beast

  14. of the field. But for Adam, there was not

  15. found a helper fit for him. So the Lord God caused a deep

  16. sleep to fall upon the man and while he slept took one of his

  17. ribs and closed up its place with flesh and the rib that the

  18. Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought

  19. her to the man, then he said this at.

  20. Last is bone of my bones and Flesh of My Flesh.

  21. Rush. She shall be called woman

  22. because she was taken out of, man.

  23. Therefore. A man shall leave his father and

  24. mother and hold fast to his wife and they shall become one flesh.

  25. And the man and his wife were both naked and they were not

  26. ashamed. God, we thank you for your true

  27. word. This is not a myth.

  28. This is not just a general idea. These were literal people

  29. according to your scriptures, according to the Lord Jesus

  30. Christ. This is the history of mankind

  31. as you designed it, and as you intended it, so, build faith in

  32. our hearts today, not just for what happened, but for what

  33. should be happening now. Show us and reveal to us.

  34. How your word lights up? Our life In This Moment?

  35. How in the year 2023? You have relevant truth.

  36. That will bless us, that will grow us.

  37. That will help us to enjoy your ideals so that we can be who

  38. you've called us to be. And so that you would receive

  39. glory and that your kingdom would be represented.

  40. Well, just like we prayed for your kingdom to come and your

  41. will to be done here on Earth as it is in heaven, God make it.

  42. So in our marriages, make it. So in our households, make us

  43. men and women who are strong in faith.

  44. Who are strong in conviction and who are wise in their

  45. application of your word. So bless us and strengthen us

  46. all through it in Jesus name, we thank you.

  47. Amen. Marriage is the Bedrock.

  48. It is the it is the foundation stone for civilizations.

  49. The first thing that the Lord starts with, he begins with it

  50. right away in Genesis, what do we do?

  51. How do we start building civilization?

  52. We see he didn't start with the civil magistrate of the

  53. government's as we reference, then we see that he didn't start

  54. with the church or establishing his his law.

  55. Now he did have law with Adam but that's this isn't the

  56. starting point. Necessarily as far as an

  57. authority structure, it's the family.

  58. It's the household. This is the building block for

  59. all civilization. Even if you're an Fever.

  60. Even if you didn't like or what you wanted to pretend the Bible

  61. wasn't true marriage is a good and right thing.

  62. So we encourage marriage for everybody.

  63. We want to see non-believers Mary, why?

  64. Because it's still the right thing for the right reason.

  65. If you love someone, you want, what's best for them.

  66. So whether or not they're loving and following the Lord, we would

  67. still say we want people to marry because it's good for them

  68. and it's still the Lord's, will it's still a way for them to

  69. practice the devotion and image and pick and and and bring a

  70. physical expression to the spiritual truths.

  71. Lord has everything that's happening in the world.

  72. Should always be bringing God's glory in that way.

  73. We see he does this right away, just like we saw with man, man,

  74. his perfect expression finds itself right away and being a

  75. husband. The same is true for a wife,

  76. will get there in a few minutes. But let's notice something else,

  77. about Eve whenever Eve is created, she is never without a

  78. covering, right away? A woman goes from her father,

  79. and she is given to her husband. Her father, brings her to her

  80. husband. We still do this in our wedding.

  81. Ceremonies and it's supposed to represent and symbolize what's

  82. actually taking place. It's not supposed to be just an

  83. entry empty tradition, often times.

  84. There have been many reasons, a lot of issues.

  85. A lot of semiotic ignorance on our parts.

  86. So they've been many many reasons where a father may have

  87. just walked his daughter down, the aisle exclusively as a

  88. tradition, because that's what you do in a wedding ceremony.

  89. But ideally, it's picturing saying I really have been

  90. blessing and covering her. That could look different ways,

  91. but it still means she knows, and he knows this man is mine.

  92. Offering a woman as a man as her covering as a gift, as a

  93. blessing, as a protection. And then he sang who gives this

  94. woman to be married to this man. And it's a very new and modern

  95. thing where he says her mother and I but the ancient thing

  96. would be I do I do her head, her covering her father.

  97. I am giving her I'm saying I'm her protector, her provider, her

  98. leader. Now this man is and it breaks a

  99. Father's Heart and at the same time like Gordon and Linda, it's

  100. the right thing at the right time.

  101. It's and it's yes, it's good and it can be difficult but its the

  102. Lords will so that everyone is blessed and receiving his best.

  103. So it's not just to be an empty tradition, but it's the point to

  104. something good and beautiful. As we said, a husband and wife

  105. are their own family. We see a husband and wife should

  106. cling to one another, they should leave their father, and

  107. mother husband, and wife, or their own family, right away

  108. their own family. It's not when they have kids,

  109. they become family, a husband and wife become a family.

  110. And in that moment, but we love our parents do.

  111. Absolutely. We do.

  112. We should honor your father and mother.

  113. Absolutely, you should. And that will never change and

  114. yet their headship in there covering that role does change.

  115. That role does look different. This is where all the young all

  116. the young couples like yeah, send it.

  117. And all the other couples are like, be careful and you don't

  118. go too far with that because that's the Temptation, like we

  119. want our, we want our children clothes and the children saying,

  120. hey, we should have some Independence here.

  121. We navigate that with wisdom as we honor our father and mother

  122. but we rejoice in the fact that a husband and wife come

  123. together, right away as their own family.

  124. Women were made, we see right away to be wives, just like a

  125. man was made to be a husband. A woman was made to be a wife.

  126. A woman's natural design, is to be a wife, the design of woman

  127. Helper, life-giver beautifier and glorify.

  128. ER, it Finds Its perfect expression as a wife and mother

  129. right away. This is the duh, this is the

  130. obvious. This is a man is to protect and

  131. provide and Lead, who his wife and children?

  132. That's you get to give your masculinity as your gift.

  133. A woman is to be the helper. The life Giver in the beautifier

  134. will. Who am I supposed to support in

  135. this, your husband, your household, your children.

  136. This is the good thing to rejoice in.

  137. So this is the starting point, but now we're going to go to

  138. Ephesians chapter 5, Ephesians chapter 5.

    Ephesians 5 chapter mention Ephesians 5 chapter mention

  139. I'm going to read a couple of sections here so you'll be able

  140. to hop around with me. We're skipping over husbands,

  141. they had their turn last week, ladies is going to feel very

  142. one-sided today. That's because it is just like

  143. last week was today will be as well.

  144. There will be correction and there will be encouragement.

  145. What we all need at all times. Ephesians 5:22 through 24 wives

    Ephesians 5:22–24

  146. submit to your own. Husband's, as to the Lord, for

  147. the husband is the head of his wife.

  148. Even as Christ is the head of the church, his body and is

  149. himself. It's savior.

  150. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should

  151. submit in everything to their husbands.

  152. And then you can look also at verse 33.

  153. However, Let each one of you love his wife as himself.

  154. And let the wife see that she respects her husband.

  155. So we were given household household codes here by pole.

  156. Peter does the same thing. We got multiple places in the

  157. New Testament where I told you before in Genesis we get all

  158. good Doctrine but it's in seed form, it's not the tree fully

  159. sprouted. Like it's the orange seed but

  160. you don't have an orange to eat yet.

  161. So so you have to be careful. You don't want to just take

  162. something in Genesis and run with it.

  163. You go, hang on. That will be proven out

  164. throughout the rest of the scriptures, you might.

  165. I think it means that okay then that needs to be proven out

  166. through the rest of the scriptures.

  167. We let everything be established in the mouth of two or three

  168. Witnesses so we want we want the whole Bible to tell us the

  169. truth. I don't want to take off running

  170. with one verse. I'm going to say what is the

  171. whole of scripture, really? Teach not?

  172. Do you have a verse for that? But what does the word of God

  173. teach? What does the word of God

  174. reveal? But in the New Testament, we get

  175. explicitly plane on. What what is often called

  176. household codes? What does it look like for

  177. husband wife children servants? And here are these household.

  178. Codes have been explicitly laid out servants are told to obey.

  179. Now, why in the world would servants have to be reminded to

  180. obey? Well, maybe because they're

  181. tempted to disobey, right? This is obvious stuff.

  182. Children are told to honor their father and mother why in the

  183. world would you have to tell children honor their father and

  184. mother? Gee golly, I wonder well, it's

  185. because obviously, they're tempted to dishonor and to

  186. disobey their father and mother, husbands are told to love their

  187. wives and be gentle with them. Why in the world would a husband

  188. have to be told to love his wife and be gentle.

  189. Her, I can't imagine. It's obvious.

  190. It's because we have a temptation to not do those

  191. things. And then wives are told to

  192. submit and respect their husbands submit to and respect

  193. their husbands. And the word respect is actually

  194. the word, reverence would be more accurate.

  195. We, there's a lot of words that are used there, that the modern

  196. translations, who said, we're not going to touch that with a

  197. 10-foot pole. But it's hip.

  198. It's almost always, it's almost always that word respect.

  199. And that passage almost always Throughout the New Testament.

  200. Go look it up for yourself, refers to Fear With Fear and

  201. Trembling as to God and the modern writers will.

  202. Actually, let's go. So every other occasion It Was

  203. Fear and in this occasion, it's this.

  204. Well I can understand why we would make that change but we

  205. can't do it because we're afraid of people, we should do it

  206. because we want to be more accurate.

  207. That's the thing that's the motive, that's the reason.

  208. So we want to understand that a husband is not God and yet the

  209. Holy Spirit still saw fit to use the same kind of word.

  210. So a wife is not to fear her husband in the the same way

  211. necessarily that we would fear God because the husband is not

  212. God and yet there is certainly a reverence that the Lord wanted

  213. to communicate their. So husbands are not God, we're

  214. not confusing our information here or mixing up with the

  215. passage says, but we understand their wife is to reverence her

  216. husband. Now why in the world would a

  217. wife has to be told these things.

  218. I can't imagine, of course, it's because this is her temptation

  219. as well. So each of these different

  220. commands are given to different people, but they're all given to

  221. bless everybody. Involved.

  222. The household codes as they're called are a blessing to

  223. everyone. It's win, win win, win win.

  224. We understand that. With our children all the time,

  225. we tell our children all the time, like if you just knew, if

  226. you just understood, like all I'm after, here is your best.

  227. Everything I do, everything I say, it's always for your good.

  228. I have no motive apart. From your thriving life.

  229. A loving husband says that to his wife.

  230. I have no motive apart from you thriving, you being blessed, you

  231. enjoying God's very best and you walking in the in the highest

  232. pleasures of the Lord. So this is good news and wives

  233. have an addition to that, they have an incredible motive that's

  234. laid out here where husband's get to show everyone how Jesus

  235. loves the church wives, get to show everyone how the church

  236. submits to Christ. Ephesians 5:24 again.

    Ephesians 5:24

  237. Now, as the church submits to Christ.

  238. So how do you think the church submits to Christ?

  239. That's the way that wives are supposed to submit to their

  240. husbands. In everything as he puts it.

  241. So wives have this motive where they get to preach the gospel

  242. through their behavior, this instruction is for you, but it's

  243. not only for you. There's more happening here at

  244. stake than just your own marriage.

  245. Well, we function like this, or we like to function like that or

  246. my husband's personality or my personality.

  247. When I'm talking personalities, we're talking God's best God's

  248. ideals. We're talking about what is

  249. actually best for everybody. Not not what my what not, what

  250. I'm personally tempted to not what I would personally.

  251. Prefer but will God really wants?

  252. What God really believes is best in nose is perfect for for human

  253. flourishing and for his glory. So there's more Happening Here

  254. than just what we think. Or what we prefer our marriage

  255. is supposed to be all about Jesus.

  256. So if our marriage is all about Jesus, people should be able to

  257. look in your life. They should be able to look at a

  258. Christian wife and go. That is the picture of how the

  259. church submits to Christ. There's a beauty, there's a

  260. trust, there's a surrender. So why is, if you ever wonder

  261. about your submission to your husband?

  262. You should ask yourself. How does the church submit to

  263. Christ? Then in the same way, submit and

  264. everything? Your husband just like a husband

  265. could do. How am I loving my wife?

  266. Well, how does Christ loved the church, brother?

  267. What's that look like okay. Well, that's how to love your

  268. wife. That's the picture, that's the

  269. starting point. So what does a good wife look

  270. like or what is a bad wife? Look?

  271. Like the scripture tells us a lot about both and I'm going to

  272. read this to you. I'm not gonna have you.

  273. Follow me and flip around everywhere.

  274. You can certainly make note of these and if you can keep up,

  275. you're welcome to. But in Proverbs 12, verse 4,

    Proverbs 12:4

  276. scripture says, an excellent wife is the crown of her

  277. husband. Exactly what Gordon was talking

  278. about. Earlier a crown on his head.

  279. An excellent wife is the crown of her husband but she who

  280. brings shame is like rottenness in his bones.

  281. We got two extremes, the crown of her husband glorious, gold

  282. rare Metals, precious metals, beautiful gemstones, glorifying

  283. and magnifying, making much of, or just the opposite Decay and

  284. sucking out his very source of life.

  285. As a crown brings gladness and Beauty in the same way, a wife

  286. magnifies her husband's Authority, First Corinthians,

  287. 11, 7 says, tells us. That woman is the glory of man.

  288. So what else can we understand from this?

  289. And these scriptures are often cited by commentaries and even

  290. in cross-references they always say hey if you're here, you this

  291. this connects directly to this passage, this connects to this

  292. passage. So this idea of crowning is the

  293. idea of glorifying woman is the glory of man.

  294. What does that? Well, your Radiance blesses and

  295. glorifies your husband, like a magnificent Crown.

  296. Adorns. The king who wears it.

  297. An excellent wife, enhances her husband.

  298. Every man knows that's the case. Wives are to be a glorious

  299. manifestation of the very best of their husbands and they are

  300. to bring their husbands, their own very best.

  301. So the idea of the crown on the king, is he still a king without

  302. the crown? Well sure, but he's glorified by

  303. it. He is magnified by it.

  304. A wife is a force multiplier. She makes a man more than he is

  305. on his own. So what can a wife do?

  306. What should she apply herself to?

  307. How do I be his crown? We should find ways to support

  308. and get creative to accomplish your husband's Mission.

  309. He is the king to borrow from that example.

  310. In Proverbs, if, if I'm his crown, what would it look like?

  311. Well, it's the opposite of the modern language.

  312. Well, I know the Bible says, the husband is the head but I'm the

  313. neck. Oh, ultimately saying I'm gonna

  314. control him and get my way and do what I want as opposed to

  315. being the crown adorns. Learning and enjoying the

  316. authority and the blessing of the kings kingdom participating

  317. in it, but not being the king, not being the neck, not being

  318. the one who is manipulating and controlling the king.

  319. So what should you do? You want to help your husband

  320. accomplish his mission? You want to get creative and

  321. find ways to help him expand and do the things that God has

  322. called them to do? Well, my husband doesn't have a

  323. mission. Might be the quick rebuttal.

  324. Well then here's what you do as a wife.

  325. You submit to him by telling him that you want to support him in

  326. his vision for the family. And for the household, ask him

  327. how you can do that. That will put the appropriate

  328. pressure on him and it will show him that you are not leading.

  329. God is going to set some of you, women free, just with that idea

  330. and itself to go well how do I get him to?

  331. How do I get him to? How do I get him to, you don't

  332. get him to, you don't be free. It's not your burden, he has a

  333. head and you're not it. I want to be a beautiful crown

  334. and now you're learning how you submit and defer to him.

  335. Hey I want to support your vision for this household.

  336. What does that instantly do inside of a man?

  337. Oh vision for household like so she hasn't just disrespected him

  338. in any way. She's honored him.

  339. She has put herself Him. Which by the way you see all

  340. through the scriptures when someone comes to a King other

  341. men coming to the king going oh King live forever, okay?

  342. Like even with I disagree with him, you see a difference, you

  343. see a respect, you see an honor, David saying, we're going to

  344. take a census, we're going to do a survey and joab's going they

  345. all the Servants of the Kingdom be yours forever.

  346. May they multiplied a thousand times.

  347. So even man-to-man, we see submission, I'm too good for

  348. that. Then you're too good to be like

  349. Jesus who Fitted to the will of the father who laid down his own

  350. life to glorify someone else. Everybody gets to be like Jesus.

  351. Husbands, get to be like Jesus in the fact that they love, man.

  352. I'm getting ahead. I'm preaching a few weeks,

  353. sermons away. You look what you all are doing,

  354. but this is good news. We all get to be like Christ in

  355. this way, but we're, but as a wife, you don't want to be the

  356. wife who is controlling you want to be the wife, who is yielding

  357. and showing him. I'm deferring to you.

  358. I'm trusting in you. You don't need to be the man of

  359. the house anymore. Ladies, you get to be the wife.

  360. So what am I supposed to do? What you're supposed to create,

  361. a leadership void. And that example, anyway, create

  362. a leadership void for him to fill.

  363. What if he doesn't? Well, that's the Temptation.

  364. That is the fear. That's the fear that often

  365. times, can lead you to then your next step of trying to control

  366. trying to force something to happen.

  367. But what if he doesn't? Well you're a woman of God who

  368. acts at the future and we're going to see this together here

  369. in a few minutes. You walk by faith and not by

  370. sight. You trust God and you dwell

  371. securely. You're like Sarah who honored

  372. her husband Abraham and you don't fear anything that is

  373. frightening. These are the commands to wives

  374. is the command. Why?

  375. Because the Lord knows that Temptation submission is

  376. difficult, headship is difficult.

  377. Everybody's got challenges and in their own flesh.

  378. There's some tations that come along with it and let the little

  379. and yet the Lord says you can do this.

  380. You can do this. Be like Sarah, who didn't fear

  381. anything that was frightening. Well, there's plus Sarah had a

  382. lot of crazy stuff happen. Her husband.

  383. Made a lot of stupid mistakes, really bad stuff.

  384. Like it's hard to hard to Fathom how Abraham made some of the

  385. decisions that he did. But the scripture that same

  386. passage and Peter says she deferred to him submitting to

  387. him even calling him Lord. What else are we told to do?

  388. What else do we see a wife? Does a wife is to not bring him

  389. shame. None of you want to be

  390. rottenness in your husband's bones.

  391. Why not? Because you're a life-giver It's

  392. the opposite of what your God designed nature is.

  393. And yet, it's with the flesh would still be tempted to why

  394. most likely most of the time. It's because of fear, oftentimes

  395. that fear can become a stronghold and it becomes an

  396. operating system for a woman. It's the operating system that

  397. she doesn't even know she has. It's like the person who's used

  398. Windows their whole life on their computer, they don't even

  399. know. Windows is an operating system.

  400. They can't fathom anything else. It's just, it's computers,

  401. right? Well actually, you're operating

  402. in a system, right? Right now.

  403. No, no. This is just the way things are

  404. maybe, but maybe not many wives have put on an operating system,

  405. and they don't even recognize that.

  406. This operating system is controlled, they don't recognize

  407. his operating system is, is built from a plate.

  408. A stronghold of fear where they're trying to, what can I

  409. do? How can I manipulate?

  410. How can I, how can I use, how can I use my influence in the

  411. bedroom to get them? To do?

  412. What I want? How can I nag him enough to get

  413. him to go my direction? How can I get him to?

  414. Because they don't understand the freedom and the surrender

  415. and the Holy Spirit work that will happen in her husband as

  416. she defers to him. They haven't been told the truth

  417. about the power of actually being a woman because it's

  418. different from the power of being a man.

  419. Women are told to be powerful. And yet, they're told to be

  420. powerful by acting like a man, and it makes them miserable.

  421. It's a heavy burden, and it makes me miserable.

  422. It's rottenness in a man's bones.

  423. But the good news is, women are powerful.

  424. When they behave like women, when they act like a feminine

  425. surrendered wife, it's a beautiful thing.

  426. So what you want to do is create that leadership void but you

  427. don't want to bring him. Shame you seek to bring him

  428. honor even if I don't think he's honorable especially if you

  429. don't think he's honorable honorable because first this is

  430. the will of God. But second honoring a husband

  431. gives him the very best chance of living up to that Crown.

  432. That's it. As best chance, I tell men, this

  433. all the time, in the counseling work that I do.

  434. How do I get her to? How do I get her to?

  435. How do I get it brother? You can't get her to, you can't,

  436. you lead with strength and love you leader, with compassion,

  437. with responsibility and an authority that shows her that

  438. you're doing, what you believe is best for everybody.

  439. That's what you're doing brother.

  440. What if what, if what if, hey all we can do is walk in our

  441. obedience. But brother, this is her best

  442. chance at submission. This is her As chance at

  443. maturity. This is our best chance at

  444. growth. What if she nothing is a

  445. guarantee. You don't get to control her.

  446. She gets to cast her own vote and the same thing needs to be

  447. said to wives, you don't get to control him.

  448. It is not an absolute guarantee and yet it is it is his best

  449. chance at Living. What if I'm this beautiful

  450. wonderful crown and he never, oh no, what if you walk in

  451. obedience to the Lord? Oh no.

  452. What if I do all this loving God and maturing as a woman of God

  453. and that in itself is its own reward.

  454. Sister that in itself is the blessing of God on your life and

  455. he is still accountable to his head and he is accountable to

  456. his head. And that is a fearful thing.

  457. We'll talk about that when we talk about headship, when we

  458. talk about submission and next couple weeks.

  459. So, especially if you don't think he's honorable, especially

  460. if you don't think he's respectable, I've heard many

  461. wives over the years. I know I'm supposed to respect

  462. my husband, but what if he's not respectable?

  463. But I've never once in my entire life, had a husband asked me, I

  464. know I'm supposed to love my wife.

  465. What if she's not lovable, I just haven't heard it.

  466. Maybe there's some dude who said it, there probably is, but we've

  467. got the passage plainly written. Love your wife, respect your

  468. husband and husband's like, yeah, I need to, and I was like,

  469. but hang on now. I feel like there needs to be

  470. some disclaimer here. Like, well, the Lord didn't.

  471. So, let's continue. What does it look like to honor

  472. him? Do you brag on him, or do you

  473. mock him? Do you celebrate him or do you

  474. condemn him? Do you defer to him?

  475. Or do you oppose him? Are you crowning him, or are you

  476. being wrought in his bones? Scripture says in Proverbs 21

    Proverbs 21:9

  477. verse 9, it is better to live in a corner of the Housetop than a

  478. house shared with a quarrelsome wife.

  479. Okay, you would think we would get the point, right?

  480. Well, he says it again, in 21 verse 19.

  481. It's better live in a desert land than with a quarrelsome and

  482. fretful woman. Okay, we got it.

  483. No, no, there's more 27:15. Mean, a continual dripping on a

  484. rainy day and of coral, some wife are alike.

  485. Well, I'm not quarrelsome. I just know the right way to do

  486. things and he doesn't, I'm not quarrelsome.

  487. I'm just trying to help. I'm not foolish.

  488. He just won't. Listen, I'm not difficult.

  489. He just doesn't see what needs to happen.

  490. I'm not always right. He just doesn't think every

  491. man's blood pressure is rising right now.

  492. As I'm here as I'm saying these things, he feels the bone, rot

  493. is look good. Get it out.

  494. So as a wife, as a woman, you have particular Temptations.

  495. You have particular Temptations for sins, like fear, like

  496. control like manipulation, like rebellion and like not being

  497. content. These are particular towards you

  498. men have sins that are particular towards them and

  499. we're all capable of all of them.

  500. And yet there are some that we're going to have a proclivity

  501. towards but these are sins to be shunned because there's

  502. something beautiful to be pursued.

  503. Just like we talked before in Ephesians, we It off the old

  504. man. That's a real Temptation and yet

  505. we've got to put off that old man and what do we do?

  506. We've got to put on the new. So what does it look like to

  507. honor? What does it look like to bless?

  508. Well, honor is not a neutral thing, a crown is not a neutral

  509. thing. A crown is a radiant thing.

  510. It's powerful and it's active. The church isn't neutral.

  511. When it comes to the Lord Jesus, he rebukes the church and

  512. Revelation saying we should be hot or we should be cold,

  513. otherwise we're disgusting to him.

  514. Sounds like rottenness in his bones.

  515. Oh, I should not be neutral when it comes to her husband.

  516. She should actively seek his good and the good of his

  517. household. No Godly wife.

  518. Like we said, wants to be riding his bones.

  519. Why? Because you are a life-giver,

  520. it's What You're Made For That is your true identity.

  521. You go huh? There's a freedom there, there's

  522. a blessing there. There is an utter relief to the

  523. surrender of a wife. So, what does this look like?

  524. It looks like encouraging him. No husband has ever complained

  525. of being over encouraged. I don't think any wife has ever

  526. either. No, man is ever said, my wife.

  527. Builds me up too much, but would a man.

  528. Want men want to be impressive. We want to impress.

  529. You be impressed, find a way to be impressed.

  530. Well, I wish he would. I know.

  531. I know you wish, and I know you've got standards and I know

  532. you've got expectations, but be impressed with what he's given.

  533. He wants to give you more, he loves you, he probably feels

  534. condemnation and guilt and weight that he hasn't been able

  535. to do more yet, and he thinks he should be farther.

  536. Along. He feels all these things.

  537. All the men are thinking. Yeah.

  538. Of course. She's thinking yeah but I just

  539. wish I would just be happy when be happy now.

  540. Be content be pleased, be impressed, be blessed.

  541. We love to give to you. We want to give to you.

  542. We want to give you the whole wide world.

  543. So be thankful, be an encourager.

  544. Find Opportunities find ways to learn how to be impressed with

  545. him admire him. This is one way that you bring

  546. him life, a discouraged. Husband many, a discouraged

  547. husband has been resurrected by the words of a kind and faithful

  548. wife. You're looking at one of them,

  549. not gonna cry. Gordon, cried, I'm not going to

  550. cry even though I'm tempted to cry.

  551. So, I can't tell any stories right now.

  552. Many of discouraged husband can be resurrected by the words of a

  553. kind and faithful wife if that's not power.

  554. I don't know what is that's more powerful than a corner office.

  555. Let's turn to Proverbs chapter 31.

    Proverbs 31 chapter mention

  556. The beautiful picture of the High Calling, one of the

  557. greatest things, it's one of my greatest Joys.

  558. One of the things that lights me up the most when I'm doing the

  559. coaching is when I'm just trying to get across to guys, the

  560. bigness in the high calling and the Majesty of being the captain

  561. of their ship with the family Captain as we call it, and it

  562. all that goes into the leadership and the pleasure that

  563. they're going to experience because that's the thing they

  564. don't yet know. They've only been told that it's

  565. a burden. And they're only thinking about

  566. it as a checklist, like, I got a clock in at work.

  567. I got a clock in with my wife. I got a clock in with the kids.

  568. Everybody wants a piece of me. And so it's this perspective

  569. where this guy is like living life as an employee of

  570. everything and everybody and said of the captain or the king

  571. of it all and enjoying the pleasure of rulership and

  572. recognizing that he gets to cultivate and create good fruit

  573. and all of it, and it's a switch and when he gets it, everything

  574. becomes exciting. I love talking a wives, in the

  575. same way to say, you've been lied to, and there's so much

  576. Beauty pleasure, and reward. ORD available to you, as you're

  577. able to embrace this here. So here in Proverbs, we've had

  578. letters from a father to his son, and we've continued to get

  579. words of the king here in Proverbs 31.

  580. The words of King Lemuel and Oracle that his mother taught

  581. him. So this was actually taught to a

  582. King by his mother and now of course he's continuing to pass

  583. this on to his son were in Proverbs, 31 verses 10 through

    Proverbs 31:10–30

  584. 30, one is what will read the woman who fears Here's the Lord,

  585. is the heading but verse 10 reads, and excellent wife, who

  586. can find she is far more precious than Jewels.

  587. So, I'm what am I just a crown? I'm just decorations.

  588. No, it's just a comparison. You're worth far more than

  589. rubies. You're worth far more than

  590. Jewels. You're worth far more than

  591. precious metals. You're worth far more than just

  592. your physical Beauty, although you are physically.

  593. Beautiful And that's a good thing and it's not to be

  594. apologize for or hidden away. What else do we know about her?

  595. The heart of her husband trusts in her and he will have no lack

  596. of gain. Wow, richness Life, Health.

  597. In this man's life, she does him good and not harm all the days

  598. of her life. She seeks wool and flax and

  599. works with willing hands. She is like the ships of the

  600. merchant. She brings her food from afar

  601. she Rises while it is yet. Night and provides food for her

  602. household and portions for her maidens.

  603. For her servants. She considers a field and she

  604. buys it very oppressed woman here, right?

  605. She is considering property and buying it.

  606. Yeah, not that. Not the narrative that we would

  607. hear in the modern day. Why?

  608. Because the heart of her husband, trusts her.

  609. Why? Because she's such a faithful

  610. and trustworthy Crown. She's so obviously supportive

  611. and doing good for his household.

  612. With the fruit of her hands, she plants a Vineyard.

  613. She dresses herself with strength and makes her arms

  614. strong. She perceives that her

  615. merchandise is profitable. Her lamp does not go out at

  616. night. She puts her hands to the

  617. distaff in her hands to hold the spindle.

  618. She opens her hand up to the poor and reaches out her hands

  619. to the needy. She is not afraid of snow for

  620. her household for all her household are closed in Scarlet.

  621. Her whole household is wearing designer clothing.

  622. Not to make a fashion statement but because of her diligent work

  623. and wealth that she has contributed to her household.

  624. She makes bed coverings for herself.

  625. Her clothing is fine, linen and purple.

  626. Her husband is known in the gates and when he sits among the

  627. Elders of the land, she makes linen garments and sells them.

  628. She delivers sashes to the merchant.

  629. Strength and dignity or her clothing and she laughs at the

  630. time to come. This is like Sarah, not fearing

  631. anything that is frightening. What about?

  632. I laugh? At the days to come says The

  633. Godly woman, says The Godly wife.

  634. Why? Because I have a heavenly

  635. father, I trust him. And, as I walk in obedience to

  636. him, he cares for me. She opens her mouth with wisdom

  637. and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.

  638. She Looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat

  639. the bread of idleness. Her children, rise up, and call

  640. her blessed. Her husband also, and he Praises

  641. her many women have done excellently.

  642. He says, but you surpass them all charm.

  643. Is deceitful, and beauty is fleeting or beauty is vain.

  644. But a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

  645. Give her the fruit of her hands and let her works.

  646. Praise her in the gates. Hallelujah.

  647. As exactly what Gordon was doing with Linda earlier.

  648. Let the work let the work that she's done the fruit speaks for

  649. itself Of. Look at her husband.

  650. Look at her husband in the same way I can say to a I can say,

  651. let me look at your wife and that'll tell me how yours a

  652. husband and say look at the husband!

  653. That'll tell me some. Does he live on the rooftop that

  654. communicates something that does he like wandering in the desert

  655. for long stretches of time? That might communicate

  656. something? But this Godly wife, what a rich

  657. rich blessing. She brings turn to Titus Chapter

    Titus 2 chapter mention

  658. 2 over to the New Testament again.

  659. Titus 2 verse 3. We got another set of household

    Titus 2:3

  660. codes here in the New Testament, more instruction, more

  661. breakdown. Just a lot of the repeating

  662. stuff. Husbands are always told the

  663. love wives are always told to submit and respect.

  664. And the connection is always made so that the Lord gets glory

  665. and so that the word of God doesn't suffer blasphemy, or

  666. rebuke Titus Chapter 2. So you're going to find First

    Titus 2 chapter mention

  667. Timothy, second, Timothy and Titus.

  668. Titus 2 verse 3. Older women likewise are to be

    Titus 2:3

  669. reverent and behavior, not slanderers or slaves, too much

  670. wine. They are to teach what is good

  671. and so train, the young women. So what are you supposed to do

  672. as an older man? You're supposed to train the

  673. younger men. What are you supposed to do as

  674. an older woman? You're supposed to train the

  675. younger women and what exactly are you supposed to train them

  676. in? If you're a woman older, women

  677. are to train the younger women to love their husbands and

  678. children to be self-controlled and pure working at home.

  679. Home, kind and submissive to their own husbands, why?

  680. So that the word of God may not be revealed.

  681. This is profound. So we see when we combine

  682. proverbs 31, the very specific, the very practical.

  683. When we combine Titus to the very specific, the very

  684. practical. We get this detailed instruction

  685. to Christian wives. What are they supposed to be?

  686. What we see this woman is a reverent woman as opposed to

  687. what as opposed to a loud woman as opposed to a foolish woman,

  688. she's not into the Momi wine culture of Instagram.

  689. She's a sober woman and she wear his dignity and strength as her

  690. clothing. She's not a busybody, she's not

  691. a gossip, she loves her husband, and she loves her children.

  692. She self-controlled. And therefore she's trusted by

  693. her husband. She submissive to her husband

  694. and she's kind to him. She's diligent and she's not

  695. lazy. She's a producer and she's not a

  696. consumer. What else?

  697. Is she she is not afraid. Praise God.

  698. What a creature. What a crown.

  699. What a woman. This is the kind of woman that

  700. the speaker of the writer of Proverbs there was saying, son,

  701. this is what you're looking for. You read Proverbs all throughout

  702. lady wisdom and the foolish woman are compared and

  703. contrasted over and over again. Run away from this.

  704. This is what you're looking for, run away from this.

  705. This is what you're looking for. But of course, he says an

  706. excellent wife, who can find Let it not be said, and the Church

  707. of Jesus, that we who can find a great husband, who loves this

  708. way, who can find a great wife, who loves this way, will he need

  709. to be in a church. That's where you're going to

  710. find a husband. That's where you're going to

  711. find a wife. Because the standards of the

  712. church represent, Jesus, and the church, we're always

  713. representing who he is and what he's done.

  714. And what his will is, the obvious theme Here, is that a

  715. good wife builds up, she blesses, she supports her

  716. husband and her household does the cliff notes.

  717. That's the short version. Proverbs 14 one says a wise

  718. woman, builds her home but a foolish woman.

  719. Tears, it down with her own hands.

  720. I'm not tearing it down. I'm just Is our temptation, but

  721. the good news ladies is women have power and their design.

  722. In their role as Helper and a Godly wife, like I said, is a

  723. force multiplier. So Force, multiplier is used a

  724. lot of times whenever you're thinking about combat, or

  725. conflict man-on-man fist on fist.

  726. All right. We, it's just you versus me.

  727. We'll see what happens. You put on a baseball bat.

  728. All right. That's a force multiplier.

  729. You just change the rules of the game.

  730. More can be accomplished now than could have been before.

  731. Okay, you pull out a firearm. Alright, that is another, that's

  732. a, the epitome of a force multiplier.

  733. So, that now, Allah, More can be accomplished than could be

  734. accomplished before. This is what a wife is.

  735. A Godly wife, is a force multiplier for the life of her

  736. husband, to say, I can bless. I can expand, I can do more.

  737. I'm going to help this man, but I'm not going to do it by being

  738. his mother. I'm going to do it by being his

  739. wife. She makes a man more than he

  740. was, she makes a home more than it was she makes life more than

  741. it was. And with her beautiful obedience

  742. she shows the world and the church, how to follow and

  743. glorify our great God and Savior Jesus because she is always

  744. showing everybody. This is what it looks like.

  745. This is what it looks like, husband gets to say, here's how

  746. Jesus loves the church and wife says, here's how the church

  747. response to the Lord Jesus Christ.

  748. We're all preaching these marriages is good in his riches,

  749. they can and should be They're going to come to an end and they

  750. were always pointing to the perfect marriage of Christ and

  751. his bride. Hallelujah, it's good to be a

  752. wife, ladies. If you're a wife, it's good to

  753. be a wife. Enjoy your role walk in it,

  754. fully repent when necessary and continue to glorify God as you

  755. obey his word towards your husband, Heavenly Father.

  756. We thank you so much for your ways that are perfect.

  757. Your ways that are true. We thank you for the right side

  758. up Kingdom in this upside down World.

  759. Continue to establish your will and your way.

  760. God, make the marriages in this church continued to thrive as

  761. husband's Love Like Jesus as wives.

  762. Submit like the church. And as everybody wins, this is a

  763. win-win scenarios. Where we get to preach the

  764. gospel with our actions. In addition, to our words, I

  765. plead the blood of Jesus over these households.

  766. Over these marriages And over the loved ones that were

  767. thinking about the ones that we want to bless the ones that were

  768. responsible for educating and training, the ones who we want

  769. influence in their lives, for the marriages that we have in

  770. mind right now, who we know are missing out on your very best

  771. God. We lift them up to you right

  772. now. And we ask that you would bring

  773. a Revival in our households. Start with us, get the log out

  774. of our own eye. Help us to walk in obedience to

  775. you. Help us to glorify your name and

  776. please you and all that we do. We love you.

  777. Lord. We thank you for helping us in

  778. Jesus name and now the Lord bless you and keep you the Lord,

  779. make his face shine down upon you and be gracious to you.

  780. The Lord lift up his countenance upon you and give you great.

  781. Peace in Jesus name. Amen.

  782. Help us to glorify your name and please you and all that we do.

  783. We love you. Lord.

  784. We thank you for helping us in Jesus name and now the Lord

  785. bless you and keep you the Lord, make his face shine down upon

  786. you and be gracious to you. The Lord lift up his countenance

  787. upon you and give you great. Peace in Jesus name.

  788. Amen.