Sermon
Can you force following? - Esther 1:10-22 - Sunday Sermon
Publisher transcript
Transcript
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My name is Mati Scaring
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and if I haven't met you, I hang out for
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a while after the service. Would love to
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meet you. Um, if you are interested in
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Thank you very much, Bill. If you're
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interested in uh getting connected more
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with Boon's Ferryy, that's what we use
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our welcome cards for. Give us whatever
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information you're comfortable with and
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we'll get in contact with you. Uh, you
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can also get subscribed to our e-
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bulletin that way. And we also use them
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as prayer request cards and pray every
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single Wednesday. So, if you got
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something to pray for, go ahead and put
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that down. And then you can drop those
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off at the connection card table. And I
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need to silence my phone here.
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Evidently,
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you put a calendar update just now.
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That's funny. I remember someone was
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doing announcements at a large church
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and I was good friends with him and so I
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just continued to call him over and over
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and over again while he was doing the
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updates. He called me out like Matise,
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stop it.
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All right, that's not my name, by the
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way. But anyway, um I went by Matise for
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years in high school and college, but uh
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my parents uh pronounce it Matis. So,
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and uh yeah, there you go. Um, all
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right. We I guess one announcement just
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remember there's going to be a men's
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meeting um on March 14th. Uh that is a
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Saturday and it's going to be in the
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morning. An evilton will be going out
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for that this week for more information.
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Um and uh so you'll know more about
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that. But just mark that on your
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calendars if you're interested in
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coming. I'd love to see a great turnout
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among the men. In a way, it's kind of a
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restart of our uh men's ministry and and
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we're not going to discontinue after
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that. We're going to be meeting on a
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more regular basis and I'm excited about
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that.
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So, let me pray and we'll get right into
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Esther. We are um in Esther just started
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last week and um we'll be in Esther
Esther 1 chapter mention
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chapter 1 10 through 22 today and uh let
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me pray and we'll get into it. Heavenly
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Father, thank you
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for the story of Esther.
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Thank you for the story of Mori as well
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and everything you're wanting to teach
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us through this book. There's just a lot
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of lessons here that are extremely
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relevant for our day and age. I pray
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that I would get out of the way that
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your Holy Spirit would speak through me
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and that what he says uh we would hear
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and uh if it requires conviction, I pray
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that you would convict, challenge, then
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challenge. If people need to be
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encouraged or consoled or whatever they
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need spiritually, Lord, your word is the
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answer to it. And I pray um that you
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would would answer our prayers regarding
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those things when it's for
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transformation especially. Lord, we want
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to be remade in the image and likeness
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of your son Jesus Christ. And we pray
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these things in Jesus name. Amen. I
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forgot to mention last week. I just want
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to do a couple of thank yous. And if
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your name's not mentioned, that doesn't
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mean I'm not thankful, but there's um
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more than one person that's really been
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helping me uh study Esther. I want to
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mention Vern and Ben uh Vern Crowley and
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Ben Jansen. Those are the two other
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elders other than me at our church, and
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we've been studying Esther, and they've
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had lots of really interesting comments
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and helpful ideas in terms of what the
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scriptures are actually saying. I also
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want to mention Greg Folk and Rebecca
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Egg. Uh Greg is a co-leader in the Bible
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study or we call them disciplehip
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communities um that used to meet in our
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house. We're currently meeting at the
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church um on Wednesday nights at 6.
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That's that's our Bible study ministry.
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If you're considering joining those,
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we're just studying Esther in advance.
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So had you been there just this last
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week, you would have studied uh and
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discussed together the exact verses that
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we're going through now. I think that's
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a great way to study the Bible where
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you're in it first and the sermon's not
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the first thing you hear. God's word is
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the very first thing you hear and then
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um you also get to hear a sermon uh and
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exhortation and conviction from that as
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well. I think it's a really good pattern
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to be in. Um but uh Rebecca Egg is our
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uh women's director and so um we've been
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working as a team to develop those
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questions for the Bible study and also
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to study through Esther and uh they've
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been they've been really helpful. I just
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there. So, in other words, there are
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things that I will be teaching here that
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are not necessarily my discoveries.
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They're discoveries of a group of Bible
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students here at the church. Um, I'm
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also mentioning those names because I'm
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going to be saying some controversial
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things today because I have to cuz the
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word brings it up and so they can share
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the blame for that. Um, which is nice.
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So, um, just to introduce a concept that
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may be helpful for you to remember the
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sermon, but also understand what's
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really being said. Um, I'm assuming that
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the vast majority of us that drive a car
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these days are using some kind of smart
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device for GPS navigation. You know, I
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have a iPhone and so sometimes I'll say,
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"Sir, navigate me home." or something
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like that. And so, uh, she acts like a
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an assistant and then I don't even have
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to type it into, um, Google Maps or
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Apple Maps in this case. Uh, you might
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be using Google Maps and you, so you
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type in an address and it takes you
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there. Um, and I've been asking people,
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how often do does the GPS mess up if you
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cut out all human error? So, you didn't
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mess up putting the address in or
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something like that. And most people say
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it still it still messes up sometimes
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and in different various ways. So, it
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might might navigate you to the wrong
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side of a property where the entrance
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actually is isn't. I've seen that happen
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before. Uh my experience, however, is
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that more often than not, even when my
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intuition is that this is taking me the
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wrong way, if I just follow the GPS
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pathway lined out, um I get there and I
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usually get there faster.
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But GPS is not 100% reliable, right? Um
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and and that's that's a reality. Uh,
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however, if you take a wrong turn, it
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will ren you the fastest way in general
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to the exact same destination. And
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that's an interesting concept, too. What
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we're really talking about here is God's
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providence or God's sovereignty. Uh,
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that works in a similar way. Where the
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metaphor breaks down is that God will
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never misdirect you. And so, if you're
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feeling misdirected, it's always user
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error, right? And that takes some
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humility. Um, but just a short story
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about user error on on uh navigation
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issues. I was going to a birthday
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out at a place called uh social goods
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and I was driving off on I5. GPS said
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that would be the fastest way. And then
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uh it was going to be like 3540 minutes.
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And I popped on like a Joe Rogan podcast
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that was about uh a guy that um I think
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he's an American that lives um I think
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it's Brazil and he he his goal is to buy
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as much land in the Amazon as he can to
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preserve it. which reminded me a little
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bit about how when we um like create
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national parks in the Redwood Forest or
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Yellowstone National Parks and that kind
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of conservation I think is actually a
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good thing and it was just really
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fascinating the kinds of things
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especially it actually made me want to
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go on a vacation Amazon someday. He
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painted the picture of being there at
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night around a fire with friends and I
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think his words were like just the con
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the cacophony of jungle sounds. you ever
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been at a zoo and they have like an
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Amazon exhibit and they pipe in the
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sounds or maybe the sounds are actually
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from monkeys and it's like I can imagine
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what that was like and he said it was
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magical and I thought that would be kind
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of magical in that sense. Uh and and so
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I was just totally wrapped attention on
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what this guy was saying about his
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conservation efforts in the Amazon and
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blew right past my exit and on I5 you
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don't necessarily get an exit for a
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while. So, uh, 20 minutes ago it was
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before I missed the exit. There were,
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uh, about 5 minutes to go. I missed the
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exit and all of a sudden it's 20 minutes
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to go. So, there's no faster pathway, a
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faster pathway back to where I need to
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go because I've blown past my exit. And
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I'm just saying that to illustrate that
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when you're not paying attention to
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God's commands, you can sometimes miss
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the exit ramp. And uh sometimes it takes
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a while to get back uh to the place that
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that you could have been. He does also
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restore the years the locusts of Eden,
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which is really an idea about how God uh
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can work all things together for your
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good in a way that's faster than you can
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even imagine. Um but at the same time,
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it's really an illustration of how there
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are consequences to disobedience, even
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if it was just the kind of disobedience
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that comes from not paying attention.
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Right? In this case, the consequence was
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not that big a deal. I was just late to
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the birthday dinner. Um, which was a
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bummer. But, uh, so that wasn't the
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GPS's mistake, though, you know. So, I
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would guess that user error is probably
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more common than the GPS making a
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mistake. And I know it's that way in
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relationship to God because God does not
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mistake make mistake uh make a single
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mistake in navigating us to the to the
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right destination. And before we even
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get into Esther, I want to make a point
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that will really help in relationship to
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understanding what God's saying through
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this passage. And that is that God's
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destination is always the foot of the
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cross. So, doesn't matter where you try
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to navigate yourself, God will navigate
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you as a Christian to the foot of the
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cross over and over and over again.
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You might think, "Oh, I'm going to
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Tarses." Well, no, he's taking you back
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to Nineveh,
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you know. So,
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God is sovereign and will providentially
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direct you to the foot of the cross.
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However, when it's against your will,
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when when he's doing so and you're not
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listening, whether it's just that you're
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not paying attention or you know exactly
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what he's telling you to do and you
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don't do it, there will be pain
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involved. And sometimes there will be
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consequences that he doesn't just take
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away as well. And those can be avoided
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by just being willing to submit in
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advance and actually pay attention. And
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and when he says take a left, take a
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left. When he says get off on this umpra
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off-ramp, even if it just really doesn't
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seem right, you do it. Um there is also
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pain in following God's will. We ought
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to be honest with that.
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Pain and following God's will is all
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over the book of Esther.
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So you're not getting out of pain uh by
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not following God's will. In fact,
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you're you're going to be certain to
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experience more pain than if you were.
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Uh but there there is suffering involved
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in actually surrendering to God's will
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as well. Uh we're going to be talking
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about that too. But if you think about
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God's sovereignty in terms of GPS
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navigation, but a perfect one that never
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errors and he's outlined the maps in the
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scripture and the directions there. But
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if you think of the destination as
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always the cross, uh that's really going
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to help in understanding the concepts
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here in Esther. And I want to give you
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my main point here from the very
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beginning. We'll have it up on the
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screen. Trusting God completely empowers
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us to lead without force and follow
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without contempt.
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And you might say, is that really what
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this is saying? Well, actually, what is
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reported to us in 10 through 22 is
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really basically the opposite. uh where
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leaders are leading by force, coercive
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force, and they're doing so because they
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believe that uh without that force,
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there's going to be wrath and contempt
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against them. Right? So, what we're
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looking at and how I constructed this
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main point is what would God have us do
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compared to what King Aasso, his
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princes, Vashi, and anybody else is
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doing in this case? And then also what
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is the right way to be in relationship
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to authority?
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King Xerxes Aasaweras was not in right
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relationship to authority. He was the
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supreme authority on earth at least in
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that region. But there is really no
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other superpower at that time. But he's
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not in right relationship to God is he?
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Remember we talked all about vain glory
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seeking the glory of created things and
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disconnection from God which always
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ultimately is just about our own glory.
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When you worship an idol, uh what you're
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really worshiping is yourself and not
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God. And since all glory actually truly
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belongs to God, when you disconnect
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worship related things from God and
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attach them to created things, it's in
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opposition to his glory. So, Aasawa was
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in opposition to God's glory. There's no
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question about it. So, you're going to
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see all kinds of negative things about
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what he's doing. He's not a great
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example to follow. is not even a good
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example to follow in terms of
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leadership. Um, we're going to apply
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that very same thought to Vashi. Was
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Vashi in right relationship to God's
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authority? And I'll make some
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conclusions there. There'll be more
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sense like this is my sense, this is my
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intuition about that one because there's
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just very little information about it.
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And so drawing two strong conclusions
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without proper biblical support is not a
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good idea. But um you'll have to make up
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your own mind about what you think
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intuitively biblically about about Vashi
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in this thing. What we what we do know
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for certain is that Morortei and Esther
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were in right relationship to God's
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authority and right relationship to
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governing authorities.
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Just to sort of uh wet your appetite for
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interesting conversation about this,
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Morai disobys the king in not bowing
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down and paying homage to Hmon. So, how
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can I say Morai was in right
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relationship to God's authority and to
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human authority?
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The reality is you cannot be in wrong
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relationship to human authority and
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claim that you're in right relationship
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to God's authority.
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You can disobey human authority and
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still be in right relationship to God's
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authority and like that's double speak.
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How does that work? I will show you how
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that works scripturally.
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But again, if we put our main point up,
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all of us are going to have authority in
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some area and influence in some area.
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You think, I'm not a leader. Well, if
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you're a mother, you definitely are.
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Leader of your children, right? Every
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single Christian is commanded to model
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the faith to others, to influence others
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towards God, to admonish one another.
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Remember the Steve sermon? you know that
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even our worship has an admonishing
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effect on one another as we sing psalms,
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hymns, and spiritual songs. And so you
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can't get around the idea that to some
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degree you're a leader in some context
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of your life. And that ought to not be
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by force. And the very same thing, no
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one can get out of following. There's no
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such thing as a human being that is
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under no authority, whether they want to
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be or not. There there are authorities
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that you are under. And so the question
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is, are we in right relationship to
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God's authority? Are we in right
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relationship to God's authority in the
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way that we lead? King Aasseras was not
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actually let's say question mark. Morai
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Esther definitely yes. Um why does that
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matter so much? Well, you will not
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glorify God if you're in wrong
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relationship to his authority. But and
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here's where we start delving into the
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the controversial things. you will also
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not glorify God if you're in wrong
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relationship to the human authorities
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he's established. There is some nuance
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and some complexity there and we'll get
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into it. Um but that that's a fact. And
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so if we're going to be not like
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Aasawera seeking his own vain glory, if
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we're going to be submissive like Morai
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and Esther were, if we're going to
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humble ourselves and therefore be
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exalted like they were, then we need to
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consider, are we at a heart level in
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right relationship to authority both as
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leaders? Are we leading in a way that's
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under God's glory in the right way?
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Well, then it won't be by force.
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Are we following in a way that's under
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God's authority? Well, then it'll be
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without contempt towards the leaders.
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Okay, so let's get into the passage and
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I'll show you how how this is really
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what God is after biblically and what
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they were doing wrong is a contrary
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example for us that helps us to
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understand just how much damage happens
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when you're not as a king relating to
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God's authority correctly or whether
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you're not doing that or doing that as
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as a queen. We'll we'll decide together
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on that. You'll make your own decision.
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Esther when she became queen was
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definitely related to God's authority
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and even the king's authority in a way
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that was right and so she glorified God
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and she could be used by God to save his
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people.
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So verse 10 starting out on the seventh
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day when the heart of the king was merry
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with wine he commanded Mehuman Bistha
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Harbona bigtha Abagtha Zethar and Carcus
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the seven unix who served in the
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presence of the of King Asaware to bring
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Queen Vashi before the king with her
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royal crown in order to show the peoples
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and the princes her beauty for she was
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lovely to look at
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just right off the bat I think it's
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really important to not go beyond what
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the scriptures are saying. It's also
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important to not stop short of what they
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are saying. Okay? So in this case, it
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doesn't say the king was drunk.
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We might think, well, this like he just
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established 180 days of partying and
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then there was no compulsion and he's
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vain glorious and he uh has emotional
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issu regulation issues like anger. We'll
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see that here in a moment. And so are we
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really going to claim that he wasn't
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drunk? Well, maybe he was. Maybe you
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feel that's a likelihood. But it just
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says that he was married with wine. He
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was affected by alcohol. Whether that
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got to the point where God saw that as
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drunkenness or not, I don't know. I
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don't know. We know that he was affected
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by alcohol. Was he affected by alcohol
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in a sinful way on this day? I'm not
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sure.
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So, however, you might think, well, he's
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not even uh a Jew. He's not even part of
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God's people. Um, he's not a God-fearing
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Gentile either, clearly. Uh, you might
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think, and this is kind of like, I don't
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know, another word other than
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anacronistic. It's like against the
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history of how it works, but he's not a
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Christian, you know, and so how can we
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expect him to do what's right? Well, I
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want to establish something. There's no
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excuse for doing what's wrong. uh
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regardless of whether you have faith or
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not. And I want to show you that. And so
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let's go to Romans 2. And this will be
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true. Romans 2:14-16. This will be true
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for everyone in this story. All the
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Unix, all the princes, the king, Vashi,
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and anybody in the Persian kingdom. For
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when Gentiles do not have the law by
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nature do what the law requires, we're
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talking about God's law. They are a law
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to themselves even though they do not
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have the law. Next verse.
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They show that the work of the law is
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written on their hearts while their
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conscience also bears witness and their
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conflicting thoughts excuse or accuse or
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even excuse them. God has written a form
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of the law on every human heart. It's
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not the same thing as when he writes the
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law on the hearts of those where he's
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given them a brand new heart, replaced
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the heart of stone, the heart of flesh,
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and now the law is written on tablets of
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human hearts. Um, that's related to the
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Holy Spirit coming and indwelling us.
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And that's not true for those who have
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not placed repented and placed their
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faith in Jesus. But there's a form of
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the law, a conscience that has been
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given. Um, and so the Gentiles, which
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includes Persians and me, those are
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Gentiles. Anyone other than the Jew
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ethnic Jewish people in this case would
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be Gentiles that they they know what
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they're doing wrong. They have no excuse
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for it.
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So you might think the very first thing
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that is mentioned here that's wrong is
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the way that it treats Vashi, but
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there's a thing before that. And I I see
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kids and so I'm going to speak about
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this in code if you want to explain it
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to your kids later. But you know what
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kings did to Unix.
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I'll admit
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there may be a way in which this is
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going beyond scripture because I I don't
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believe that we can say that every
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single unic was made a unic. There may
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have been ones that weren't. But if you
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do your historical research, which again
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it's not authoritative, it's not it's
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outside the Bible. So there can be error
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in historical counting, but just about
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every unic in the Persian Empire was was
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made so on purpose. Even before they
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came into that service, they were taken
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into slavery. Uh they were made Unix and
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then that made them way more valuable to
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be sold. Unix were highly sought after.
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Why were they made Unix? Well, because
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they'd be more trusted with the herum,
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you know. So adults, you know exactly
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what I'm talking about. kids. I'm
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intentionally limiting how much I'm
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saying because I want to respect your
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parents and when they want to introduce
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you to those kinds of things. But the
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point is um
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that's obviously sinful to do that to
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men.
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So already there's a sin mentioned here
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just by virtue of these kinds of unics.
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It's it's basically impossible that none
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of these Unix were made Unix because
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that's just not the way the Persians did
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things.
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So, however, it may also, so in our
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offense, rightful offense that
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a megalomaniac womanizer temper tantrum
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god king would do that to people. Maybe
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one of those is your sons and your son.
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Now, I'm not saying get over the fence.
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That ought to be offensive to us that
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men treat other men that way. However,
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we ought not to think that like that
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they had it all bad. Some of these Unix
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were the most trusted adviserss in the
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kingdom, had the highest positions of
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authority. Well, maybe not the highest,
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but very high positions of authority.
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And so, I'm not saying that's like
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somehow balances out the evil that was
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done to them, but you have to realize
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they were highly respected men in the
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kingdom.
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Um, another thing about them, I'm going
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to continue speaking in code here. If
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you think about the reason why men that
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were made Unix are trustworthy around
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all the king's wives, right? Think about
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that concept. Um, there's a reason for
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that because they can't do a certain
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thing. And so
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obviously the king
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had this skepticism about any kind of
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man being trusted around his wife,
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right?
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And so there's this hypocrisy to begin
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with.
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That's a sin as well before the
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objectification of Vashi. I don't know
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if you thought about this, but who is
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going to report to her that he wants to
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go parade her around in front of all
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these men because of her beauty?
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Objectif fire in front of other people.
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The Unix was the purpose of the Unix
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that all of these wives were before the
-
king only. All their beauty,
-
everything that belongs to marriage,
-
even when it's polygamous marriage,
-
belongs just to the king. And yet he's
-
sending the very men that were made Unix
-
so that they would not do what you you
-
know to go and tell Vashi, hey, I want
-
to come and have all these other men
-
lust after you. It's hypocrisy.
-
So there's just a bunch of sin here. We
-
can all agree uh Hasseris is in in deep
-
wrong here. He's affected by alcohol.
-
He's doing something foolish. It's
-
sinful towards his his queen wife.
-
So there's a bunch of sin. There's no
-
question about that. It's a bunch of sin
-
of sin. Verse 11 again, to bring Queen
-
Vashi before the king with her royal
-
crown in order to show the peoples and
-
the princess her beauty for she was
-
lovely to look at. If you think about
-
how much we talked about vain glory
-
before, he's using his wife here just as
-
another extension of his vain glory.
-
It's fertile ground for application.
-
And I'll move on quickly from it. But
-
husbands can do that.
-
You've got an agenda,
-
a fleshly one, selfish ambition, looking
-
to advance yourself. You're telling
-
yourself, "I'm doing it for my family."
-
But you're not even there for your
-
family. Just always at work. And then
-
your wife starts complaining about the
-
fact that you're always at work and
-
you're not prioritizing her or the
-
family and you're never helping. And
-
what she's kind of doing in your mind is
-
undermining your plan for greatness. You
-
might not say it to yourself that way,
-
but she's seemingly not helping you
-
advance your career here because, well,
-
she's always complaining. And so, you
-
get you get angry.
-
You get angry. When when your family is
-
just being used as an extension of your
-
vain glory, you will harm them. harm
-
them with that
-
because that's not where we're supposed
-
to lead our family. We're supposed to be
-
first and foremost led to the cross and
-
then lead our family to the cross.
-
There's no selfish ambition there, is
-
there? And that's where we glorify the
-
Lord. When our flesh is surrendered to
-
the killing, when it's crucified, that's
-
when we can discern God's will for us.
-
That's when we're in right relationship.
-
There's no right relationship to the
-
authority of God if you're away from the
-
foot of the cross. If you're not
-
surrendered to him.
-
So yeah, there's plenty Xerxes type
-
leaders out there today, not just
-
husbands. Think of the political arena.
-
This question has an obvious answer, but
-
do you see some political leaners
-
just seem the only it seems like the
-
main thing that they're there's the
-
reason for why what they decide is that
-
they're seeking their own selfish
-
ambition, vain glory, making themselves
-
look great. And then the very people
-
they're elected to serve in this case
-
are the ones that get harmed.
-
Happens all the time.
-
So we we have to think about not just oh
-
this evil monarch back then uh vain
-
glorious desires desires to use others
-
as an extension of your own vain glory.
-
The the objectification for of women for
-
that very purpose. It's all over our
-
society. And we're not to be conformed
-
to the world, but we're in a world where
-
that is what we're marinating in unless
-
we're paying attention to God's word.
-
So we have to think about that. So
-
at a minimum, so you you'll get scholars
-
that say basically he had commanded her
-
to just come only in her crown, right?
-
Naked in front of everyone. Uh that's
-
not what the scriptures say. Uh it all
-
it says is to bring Queen Vashi before
-
the king with the royal crown in order
-
to show the peoples and the princes her
-
beauty for she was lovely to look at. Is
-
is it possible that that what was meant
-
was that she'd come naked? It's possible
-
but it's not what it says. Okay. So I'm
-
not going off of that in
-
considering and discerning things about
-
okay how should Aasaweris as a husband
-
have related to Vashi and how should a
-
Vashi related to him? I'm just looking
-
at those words. If if she was naked,
-
that's a dramatically different
-
discernment tree. I think we can all
-
agree on that. Can we also all agree
-
that at a minimum
-
the king was sinfully objectifying his
-
wife?
-
Right. At a minimum, you may feel more
-
strongly than that.
-
You don't need a a show show of hands,
-
but just I'm going to be talking to men
-
and to women and to husbands and to
-
wives. Uh just to the women here, uh is
-
Vashi a sympathetic character to you?
-
Are you offended for her? I I don't like
-
asking trick questions. I'm never trying
-
to trick you unless I'm trying to be
-
funny, but not at your expense. But in
-
this case, it's not a trick question.
-
I'm offended for her. A husband ought
-
not to do this. It's an evil thing to
-
do. Parade your wife around other men.
-
I've never seen a red carpet event like
-
the Oscars without men doing that. By
-
the way, it's all over our culture. The
-
stars, the heroes, the politicians,
-
everybody noteworthy seems to be doing
-
it. Almost everybody seems like rare
-
that that's not happening.
-
So, so are you offended for I'm offended
-
for this is wrong. It's wrong. Okay. So,
-
we have to admit what he's doing is
-
wrong. There's no question about it.
-
Objectifying women is not okay.
-
objectifying your wife is sinful. You
-
should be protecting her from that very
-
thing. So that's that's absolute.
-
That's clear to me.
-
However, what started happening when I
-
was studying this with the elders and
-
with Greg and Rebecca is I started
-
comparing Esther Dashi.
-
What God is providentially doing here in
-
terms of just his guiding control over
-
all things is he's removing Vashi and
-
installing Esther for his own purposes.
-
That's there's no question about that.
-
That's that's uh part of the narrative
-
setup of the story. Here's what happened
-
here. How Esther came to be queen. But
-
you see how it says for she was lovely
-
to look at.
-
Um it says the very same thing in
-
chapter 7 verse chap chapter 2 verse 7.
-
I I don't didn't give it the team so not
-
even look at it but it says uh he Morai
-
was bringing up Harasa that is Esther
-
the daughter of the of his uncle for she
-
had neither father nor mother the young
-
woman had a beautiful figure and was
-
lovely to look at
-
you'll find zero evidence that aasoeres
-
had any kind of transformation in his
-
character between the time he just vashi
-
and then makes uh uh Esther queen In
-
fact, you'll have all the evidence that
-
he was just continuing in his arrogant,
-
womanizing, vain, glorious ways.
-
It's an odds thing reading between the
-
lines. It's not totally authoritative,
-
and I wouldn't ever put it that way. But
-
what are the odds he didn't objectify,
-
at least in his heart, Esther,
-
also lovely to look at, the king hasn't
-
changed. The queen ends up changing.
-
Literally changing persons.
-
So, so there's that. So, then I asked
-
myself, what would have Esther done in
-
this situation?
-
And that that just brings up a a a deep
-
often controversial, I don't think it
-
ought to be
-
discussion about what is the limit
-
to a husband's authority in relationship
-
to his wife. What is the limit of a
-
wife's submission or following?
-
You know, if a husband is leading
-
coercively
-
knew that Hassaweras was was coercive,
-
you know, is it's all coercive power.
-
Coercive power. You see that right with
-
the Unix from the very beginning.
-
Coercive power, not actual trust. So
-
what should have she done? So let's
-
consider some scriptures. And I want to
-
say from the beginning, I will draw
-
conclusions, but it's meaningless for me
-
to draw conclusions um in terms of your
-
own conviction. They may be a guide for
-
you, but you have to you have to come to
-
your own conviction. And I'm trying to
-
balance this between talking about how a
-
husband should lead and how a wife
-
should follow and not just focus too
-
much on one or the other. Um this will
-
also not you think, well, I'm not
-
married, so how does this apply to me?
-
Well, at at a minimum, anything about
-
marriage will apply in terms of
-
preparation for you, but we're also
-
going to be talking about uh
-
relationship to authority in general. In
-
fact, that's that's where I want to
-
start. So, if you're if you're um a unic
-
and you've been terribly mistreated by
-
the king, how should you relate to the
-
king? Um if you're American citizen and
-
you feel like our politicians are
-
telling you to do wrong stuff, how
-
should you relate to them? What does God
-
want? What are the limits
-
of what it looks like to be in right
-
relationship to authority? So, right off
-
the bat, let's go to 1 Peter chapter 2
1 Peter 2 chapter mention
-
13-20.
-
You can turn there if you want to, or
-
you can just read it off the screen with
-
me, but 1 Peter chapter 2 verse 13- 20.
-
All right. says this, "Be subject for
-
the Lord's sake to every human
-
institution, whether it be to the
-
emperor as supreme or to governors sent
-
by him to punish those who do evil and
-
to praise those who do good."
-
If I remember correctly from a study
-
from first first Peter, the emperor at
-
this time was Nero. Don't quote me on
-
that, but he was a very evil man. Uh
-
almost no um uh Roman emperors at the
-
time weren't. So,
-
we can take that off off the table right
-
away that God would say, "Well, submit
-
to them unless they're evil." No, the
-
emperor was most certainly not a
-
god-fearing man at this time and did a
-
bunch of evil things historically. So,
-
be subject to the Lord's sake for every
-
human institution, whether it be to the
-
emperor as supreme or to the governors
-
as sent by him to punish those who do
-
evil and to praise those who do good.
-
For this is the will of God that by
-
doing good you should put to silence the
-
ignorance of foolish people. Can we put
-
our main point back up again?
-
Am I not right to say that that being
-
able to obey this starts with trusting
-
God completely?
-
Not every state and not every not every
-
governor is a godless governor.
-
We happen to live in a state where
-
that's to be the case.
-
very clearly.
-
And so, you really have to trust God
-
completely if you're going to accept in
-
your heart,
-
his will's good for me,
-
even if I have to submit to a godless
-
leader.
-
Uh, the way that Rebecca put this, I
-
want to give her credit for that. It's
-
like, what's your trust factor?
-
She did put on a scale from 1 to five,
-
but like if it's not a five, are you
-
really going to continue to submit when
-
things get really hard? No human being
-
wants to submit. That's not how we
-
that's not our base model, right? The
-
flesh like no hard no submitting.
-
So it says though, for this is the will
-
of God that by doing good you should put
-
to silence the ignorance of foolish
-
people.
-
So that's one benefit of actually
-
submitting. Did you know that God will
-
use that to put to silence the ignorance
-
of foolish people?
-
Says, "Live as people who are free, not
-
using your freedom as a cover up for
-
evil, but living as servants of God." So
-
again, the headarters of all right
-
relationship
-
um to authority is first,
-
and I wouldn't even say foremost, just
-
first submitting to God. That's where it
-
all comes from. Do what he says. He says
-
submit to the governing authorities. So
-
you can't be in right relationship if he
-
sees that in your heart you're not
-
actually submitted to the the uh
-
authorities. And by the way, maybe not
-
just as Americans, but we tend to like
-
anti-heroes who are rebels. I'm not
-
going to submit to that. And it's like,
-
yeah, get him, you know, but that's not
-
the character God's looking for.
-
Honor everyone, love the brotherhood.
-
Fear God. Honor the emperor. Now,
-
speaking of people like Unix or a wife
-
that's married to a husband that's not
-
following God's will, maybe he's also um
-
the kind of guy that objectifies her and
-
has the wrong relationship to alcohol
-
and all these different kinds of things.
-
Look what it says. Verse 18, servants,
-
be subject to your masters with all
-
respect, not only to the good and
-
gentle, but also to the unjust.
-
For this is a gracious thing. When
-
mindful of God, one endures sorrows
-
while suffering unjustly.
-
I doubt there's a person in this room
-
that doesn't understand what God's
-
saying.
-
It exactly how it sounds. That's what it
-
means.
-
For it is a gracious thing when mindful
-
of God, one endures sorrows while
-
suffering unjustly. Apply that concept
-
to Vashi with me. If she was not forced
-
to disrobe in order for this to happen,
-
could she have obeyed her king even
-
though he was wrong and allowed herself
-
to be paraded in front of these men?
-
Let's start with the very first limit.
-
If what any human being is commanding
-
you, asking you, or leading to you to do
-
is sin, you can't do it. Period.
-
because that would make you then in
-
wrong relationship to the ultimate
-
authority, the first authority, which is
-
God.
-
So if you want to be in right
-
relationship to authority, you no matter
-
what the consequences, you have to say
-
no to sinning as a result of following
-
someone's command.
-
Let me show you an example of that.
-
Let's go. We're skipping forward here.
-
No, it's actually the next verse. Acts
-
Acts 5:27.
-
The apostles modeled this to us. And
-
when they had brought them, this is the
-
the Sanhedrin, the council of Pharisees
-
and Sadducees with the high priest, they
-
set them before the council and the and
-
the high priest questioned them. Does
-
the high priest have authority? Oh yes,
-
he does. That is an even though these
-
high priests were like Pharisees in both
-
the ancient and modern sense of that
-
word. Uh God established that
-
institution. So they do have authority
-
and the high priest questioned them.
-
Next verse saying, we strictly charged
-
you not to teach in this name. Yet there
-
ha here you have fulfilled or excuse me
-
yet here you have filled Jerusalem with
-
your teaching and you intend to bring
-
this man's blood upon us. So they
-
commanded them to stop doing evangelism,
-
stop speaking in Jesus' name. Verse next
-
verse, what does Peter say? But Peter
-
and the apostles, all of them answered,
-
we must obey God rather than men. Next
-
verse. And the God of our fathers raised
-
Jesus whom you killed by hanging him on
-
the tree. Just hold like
-
they just got done reiterating the
-
command not to do it. Peter says we got
-
to obey God. And does it again.
-
So he's definitely disobeying human
-
authority
-
because God's commands always trump
-
human authority. That's another
-
established point. We're talking about
-
limits here. Do we have another verse
-
there? God exalted him at his right hand
-
as leader and savior to give repentance
-
to Israel and forgiveness of sins. I
-
think we have a couple more at least one
-
more verse. And we are witnesses to
-
these things and so is the Holy Spirit
-
whom God has given to those who obey
-
him. And maybe one more. And they heard
-
when they heard this they were enraged
-
and wanted to kill them.
-
It's like no different than what's
-
happening uh in in Esther. Uh sometimes
-
obeying God puts you in terrible harm's
-
way even up to a threat to your life.
-
So sometimes you have to obey God and
-
sometimes you have to disobey God. Um
-
excuse me. So disobey human uh authority
-
to obey God. Uh
-
but then what is happening here in verse
-
19 back to 1 Peter 2:10.
-
For this is a gracious thing when
-
mindful of God when endures sorrows
-
while suffering unjustly. For what
-
credit is it if when you sin and are
-
beaten for it you endure.
-
But if when you do good and suffer for
-
it you endure. This is a gracious thing
-
in the sight of God.
-
We're going to go 21 through 25 because
-
that's the whole answer. You want to you
-
want to see scripture prove that the
-
cross the foot of the cross is always
-
the right destination in relationship to
-
whether you're in authority or under the
-
authority of someone else. You'll see
-
Christ as the trailblazer of that and he
-
is who we are to imitate. But
-
when you still do good in the context of
-
submitting to a leader who's being
-
unjust and you suffer for it and you
-
endure under that, that's a gracious
-
thing in the sight of God. Let's go to
-
now. So that's that's authority to
-
everyone. So you really have to consider
-
can I obey here because as God
-
finds that to be of high esteem. It's a
-
gracious thing. He sees that you can
-
only do that with his power and it
-
glorifies him when you do that. But you
-
have to stop short of of sinning because
-
sin never glorifies him. That's wrong
-
relationship to authority. So yeah, you
-
really do have to obey God no matter
-
what. And you really do have to obey
-
human beings, but not no matter what.
-
But in my experience, just looking out
-
at our world and as a pastor, people are
-
so quick to be like, "Well, he's telling
-
me to sin." When actually, no, not
-
necessarily. You just really don't want
-
to do it. Can we all agree that if we
-
were Vashi, we would not want to be
-
paraded in front of a bunch of men.
-
What do you think Esther would have
-
done? What do you think Esther would
-
have done? Do you think she would have
-
submitted in this situation
-
if if all it was was being paraded
-
around with clothes,
-
objectified in that way? Could you Could
-
you still submit? It's unjust. It's
-
wrong.
-
You're not going to want to do it. It's
-
going to harm you to some degree, right?
-
Didn't we just get done seeing that?
-
That sometimes following the way that
-
God wants you to follow will cause
-
suffering. For this is a gracious thing.
-
When mindful of God, one endures sorrows
-
while suffering unjustly.
-
You have to have a lot of trust in God
-
to be willing to do that. that following
-
someone who's telling you to do
-
something that will not seem to be good
-
on this from an earthly perspective and
-
and is going to cause you pain
-
and yet you're still going to like
-
positionally submit to them.
-
You don't in that case, by the way, have
-
to agree that they're right. That's it's
-
unjust. The Bible says it's unjust what
-
they're doing in this situation. What
-
Xerxes did was unjust. It's wrong.
-
Can you still follow?
-
I'll give I'll give you my answer. I
-
believe that Esther would have submitted
-
to this ugly command. I think she would
-
have. You may not be convinced of that
-
yet, but man, when we start going
-
through Esther's character in the next
-
couple chapters,
-
she's painfully submissive. I don't mean
-
painfully as in wrong, but I put myself
-
in her shoes and I'm like just against
-
your will taken into a herum as a
-
teenager. Was that a teenage woman's
-
dream
-
to be one of many wives of to a god king
-
who has a reputation a bad one?
-
Still her behavior towards him is so
-
respectful
-
and submitted.
-
So I I it seems to me she would seems
-
seems I don't know. There's not enough
-
information, but I'm thinking about
-
these things. I'm I'm not a wife. I'm a
-
husband. And yet I'm under all kinds of
-
authority. I'm under the authority of
-
the elders. I'm under the authority of
-
um first responders like policemen. I'm
-
I'm uh I'm under the authority of the
-
governor. I'm under the authority of the
-
mayor. I'm under the authority of the
-
courts.
-
I'm under the authority of the principal
-
of the school we have our kids at. I
-
can't just be like, "No, you can't
-
lead."
-
And I mean, when do you ever agree with
-
any everything a leader says? So, I'm
-
thinking like, "Am I as submissive as
-
Esther?" And I'm like, "I want I want to
-
be, but man, it will be painful
-
sometimes."
-
So, let's go to husbands and wives here.
-
Verse chapter 3:1 of First Peter. Again,
-
we're just talking about how to relate
-
to authority correctly here. Likewise,
-
wives be subject to your own husbands,
-
so that even if some do not obey the
-
word, they may be one without a word by
-
the conduct of their wives when they see
-
your respectful and pure conduct. Is
-
that really saying what it sounds like
-
it's saying? Let me read it again.
-
Likewise, wives, be subject to your own
-
husbands, so that even if some do not
-
obey the word, they may be one without a
-
word by the conduct of their wives.
-
Again,
-
the limit is simple in a way. If your
-
husband tells you to sin, don't. Because
-
remember, your ultimate allegiance is to
-
God. But God said here, be subject to
-
your husbands. In other places, wives,
-
submit to your husbands. So,
-
to some degree, this husband's not
-
obeying God's word. And he's obviously
-
making decisions based on not obeying
-
God's word because there's no such thing
-
as a married couple that doesn't have to
-
make any decisions,
-
right?
-
And yet there's something so far beyond
-
is it right or wrong for me? What's that
-
gracious thing that God's looking? He's
-
looking for,
-
in this case, wives that he can use to
-
bring their husbands to repentance. And
-
isn't that what you want anyway?
-
If you're just under the authority as as
-
a man, if I'm under the authority of
-
another man and I I can't break the
-
positional authority because that
-
disobys God and I want to live my whole
-
life to glorify him. So, I need to
-
submit, but they're telling me to do
-
something that really isn't biblical.
-
But but is it sin for me to accept it
-
and remain in submission? That's the
-
question. And if it's not, you have to
-
submit anyway. And then God can use that
-
respectful conduct, whether you're a
-
wife in a marriage or uh a man or a a
-
kid being parented wrongly, whatever it
-
is,
-
God's after not just is it right or
-
wrong for you, is it going to feel bad,
-
he's after using your witness to bring
-
the person in authority to repentance.
-
It's a greater calling when you think
-
about marriage in the first place
-
according to Paul in Ephesians 5. It is
-
an image of Christ's relationship to the
-
church. So when a husband and wife are
-
in right relationship to each other,
-
they glorify God's plan for salvation in
-
relation Jesus in relationship to the
-
church. That passage does say submit to
-
one another in reverence for Christ. And
-
so there are times, Christine's sitting
-
right here, where she's right and I'm
-
wrong.
-
Guess whether I always do what she says,
-
even when she's right.
-
No. Sometimes it takes me a while
-
because I'm not being humble.
-
So what does she then have to do? Think
-
about it as husbands. Think about it how
-
horrible it is for your wife to have to
-
continue following you when you're not
-
obeying God's word. terrible position to
-
put your wife in.
-
In spirit, not that much different than
-
what Hassaweris was doing. Putting Vashi
-
in a terrible position, not protecting
-
her and her purity. Also, he's leading
-
other men into sin on top of it.
-
Objectifying women is sinful. Period. So
-
man,
-
if the off-ramp for Vashi was like I
-
intuit it was to actually do it anyway.
-
That's the offramp every one of us wants
-
to blow by. Is it not?
-
And God's like, "Take it. Trust me. Take
-
it."
-
I want to show you something. We'll come
-
back to the first Peter chapter 3
1 Peter 3 chapter mention
-
passage regarding marriage. I want to go
-
back to the passage and back to Esther
-
and I want to show you something because
-
in God's sovereigns, God was removing
-
Vashi and installing Esther for his
-
purposes. However, God did not need
-
Esther.
-
Didn't work like that. He decided to use
-
her, but he did not need her. Uh,
-
chapter 4 shows that in Morcai's words,
-
chapter 4:14. I think I've got that one.
-
We're in like the middle of the conflict
-
of the whole book, like kind of
-
climactic here. And here's what Mordei
-
says to to her. For if you keep silent
-
at this time,
-
relief and deliverance will rise for the
-
Jews from another place. But you and
-
your father's house will perish. And who
-
knows whether you have not come to the
-
kingdom for such a time as this? There's
-
a there's an off-ramp. Or maybe you
-
ought to think about it. Don't take the
-
off-ramp. Don't take the easy way. Keep
-
driving straight ahead. you got to speak
-
up. Initially, she'd been commanded by
-
Morai, not just guided, commanded not to
-
make her ethnicity known. Don't tell
-
them you're a Jew. Now, he's saying,
-
"Yagada."
-
What does she say? Let's just skip down
-
to verse the end of verse 16. If I
-
perish, I perish. She puts her life on
-
the line. But had she not, deliverance
-
would have arisen from somewhere else.
-
So God didn't need Esther. I love
-
Esther. She's a heroine of faith. She's
-
she's awesome. But she wasn't actually
-
like absolutely necessary.
-
So if you if you look at that like could
-
have God used Vashi to advise the king
-
that he's being fooled by Hmon so as not
-
to destroy us. he if she had been
-
willing to submit say, "Well, she's not
-
even like a person that submits to God
-
in the first place." Yeah. Still no
-
excuse. Remember Romans 2.
-
So the way that I read the story is that
-
God God could have used any queen that
-
was willing to submit to him and put her
-
life on the line to go tell the king
-
what's happening is terribly wrong.
-
do something.
-
It's a what if. I just don't want to go
-
beyond scripture. But what if the reason
-
God wasn't using Vashi is because she
-
wasn't willing to actually submit to the
-
king. It's a what if. What if? Maybe we
-
get to heaven and God says, "No, Vashi
-
wasn't in the wrong here." Maybe that's
-
how you feel. But it's a worthy
-
discussion to consider, isn't it?
-
Because it's going to come up in your
-
life over and over and over again.
-
So when a queen doesn't submit, when a
-
wife doesn't submit,
-
when a subordinate of any kind, when a
-
son or daughter
-
or an employee
-
doesn't submit, what do you do? Well,
-
you make a law against that, don't you?
-
That's what they do. This is how the
-
world works. Listen to this. We'll
-
continue reading, and I'll probably read
-
most the rest of the story here because
-
it's all just kind of one big chunk.
-
Verse 12. But Vashi refused to come at
-
the king's command delivered by the
-
Unix.
-
At this the king became enraged and his
-
anger burned within him.
-
Let me take just a couple minutes.
-
I I believe that one of the greatest
-
temptations or like context for
-
temptation is when your will is being
-
thwarted. You ever get angry when your
-
will is being thwarted? My mom used to
-
hate when my dad did this. My dad
-
conquered a lot of the anger that was
-
kind of falling through the generations.
-
Uh Garings have had anger problems all
-
the way through. And the only way to
-
overcome that as a son of an angry
-
father is to repent and to let God be in
-
control of your emotions. Um uh but
-
every once in a while it slipped out and
-
like he would trip on one of our shoes
-
and he'd kick it across the entire room.
-
In addinate object rage is what I call
-
that. And I inherited that. Uh, I don't
-
know if you did or whether you just
-
experienced this, but it's like you're
-
getting upset at an inanimate object for
-
thwarting your will. Did it do it on
-
purpose?
-
No. How much more angry are you going to
-
be when someone thwarts your will on
-
purpose?
-
Kids are so good at that
-
by nature.
-
>> I'm good at that. Thwarting people's
-
will. I find myself in little fantasies
-
about how I might thwart somebody's will
-
that's in the wrong. Not the right
-
attitude, is it?
-
Not what God wants from people in
-
positions of followership. I don't know
-
followership, leadership and
-
followership. I don't know if that's
-
even a word, but I think you know what I
-
mean by it. Like he he's not looking for
-
us to find ways to thwart the will of
-
the people in authority.
-
There are extreme cases, not the sermon
-
for it, where that may may be the only
-
faithful thing to do. So, but anyway,
-
let's continue here. So, Vashi or Aseras
-
is enraged. So,
-
you're going to have to be under the
-
control of the spirit when anybody
-
that's under your charge that you're
-
supposed to be leading is intentionally
-
thwarting your will cuz it will make you
-
upset.
-
And then that's where the peace and the
-
self-control of the spirit, the
-
gentleness and the kindness. Can we put
-
the main point up again? When you
-
completely trust God and someone's not
-
following, it will empower you to lead
-
without force. Anger will make you want
-
to be forceful though, won't it? with
-
your children, with your wife, as a
-
mother to your children, as a father to
-
your children, to employees, to anybody
-
you have any authority in relationship
-
to.
-
When your will is being thwarted, you
-
want to enforce. It's just human nature.
-
And you might do that in different ways.
-
You know, you can do it manipulatively.
-
You can do like a full frontal assault
-
kind of thing, like must throw
-
everything at this person to overcome
-
their will. But it's not God's way. It's
-
by the spirit, not by force.
-
And so, you got to you got to trust him
-
in those situations as a leader because
-
sometimes there's terrible consequences
-
for people not being willing to do what
-
you're telling them. Sometimes they have
-
to get fired at at work, you know, and
-
maybe you really care about them and you
-
don't want them to get fired and so
-
you're trying to manipulate it so that
-
they'll do what you that's not the way.
-
Verse 13. And then the king said to the
-
wise men who knew the times, for this
-
was the king's procedure towards all who
-
were versed in the law and judgment.
-
Okay, so they're called wise men. Um
-
they're called versed in the law. And
-
next verse 14, the men next to him were
-
Carina, Shethar, Admatha, Tarses, Meis,
-
Marcina, and Meican, the seven princes
-
of Persia and Media, who uh saw the
-
king's face and sat first in the
-
kingdom. like a whole bunch of powerful
-
men under the rulership of Hasaweras
-
according to the law. What is to be done
-
to Queen Vashi? Because she did not ha
-
has not performed the command of King
-
Hassaweras delivered by the Unix
-
like what are we what are we going to
-
do?
-
How are we going to coercively force
-
this situation to be right? Verse 16.
-
Then mechan said in the presence of the
-
king and the officials not only against
-
the king has queen Vashi done wrong but
-
also against all the officials and all
-
the peoples who are in all the provinces
-
of King Aasaweres for the queen's
-
behavior will be made known
-
to all women causing them to look at
-
their husbands with contempt since they
-
will say King Aoseres commanded Queen
-
Vashi to be brought before him and she
-
did not come this very day the noble
-
women of Persia and media who have heard
-
of the queen's behavior will say the
-
same to all the king's officials and
-
there will be contempt and wrath in
-
plenty.
-
What is what is Meicanin is kind of the
-
spokesperson for the wise men for the
-
for the princes here saying
-
all our wives are going to disobey us
-
too.
-
Was that a phantom fear? Was that a real
-
fear? Did Vashi have that kind of
-
influence with all the noble women? I
-
mean there is just a little bit of
-
evidence that she had some Queen Vashi
-
verse 9 also gave a feast for the women
-
in the palace that belonged to King
-
Aasaweres.
-
I think that the noble women kind of
-
liked her. That's my guess. I don't
-
know. But whether it's a phantom fear or
-
whether it's a real fear, it's a fear.
-
And what are these princes actually
-
afraid of? They're afraid of being
-
treated with contempt and wrath and
-
plenty.
-
Put the main point up again. Did you
-
know that men in leadership are afraid
-
of the contempt and wrath of women,
-
especially their wives? Do you know that
-
husbands are afraid of that?
-
We don't like it. Scary. Not fun.
-
What is it? Hell hath no fury. Those
-
those truisms come from somewhere, you
-
know, so they're afraid.
-
A housewares is angry.
-
You mix fear with angry and out comes
-
force.
-
There's almost no other way. You're
-
going to try to control the thing that
-
makes you angry and afraid, aren't you?
-
It's not the way of the spirit. It
-
doesn't require trusting God completely,
-
does it? Let's continue.
-
So, there'll be this contempt and wrath.
-
They'll follow Vashi's way. That can't
-
be. There ought to be a law against that
-
wife's behavior. You know, there ought
-
to be a law. That's Greg's line. Uh,
-
have you ever had that attitude in
-
relationship to your wife or husband?
-
Like, basically, you're saying, "I wish
-
that was illegal, how you just treated
-
me."
-
You know, when the law seems to be in
-
your favor, even it's wrong. A lot of
-
people go along with it. Not a good
-
thing.
-
Verse 19. If it pleased the king, let
-
the royal order go out from him, and let
-
it be written among the laws of the
-
Persians and the Mes, so that it may not
-
be repealed that Vashi is never again to
-
come before King Aasaweras.
-
I'm not sure if this equals divorce, but
-
in spirit, it's pretty close.
-
Maybe she remained a wife. She gets the
-
title queen's taken from her. She's
-
known as Vashi after this and she never
-
sees him again. So it's at least in
-
spirit breaking God's law and every
-
husband knows better. That's your wife.
-
It's to to death do us part. You made
-
vows
-
a tree thwarts your will one time and
-
you know
-
I was going to say off with her head but
-
not not quite out of my sight. Never
-
come into my sight again. Not God's
-
will. not God's will at all. In one
-
sense, it is because God is
-
providentially working it out so that uh
-
so that Esther ends up rising to the to
-
the throne. But his revealed moral will.
-
It's not the right way to treat your
-
wife. Not ever.
-
If it pleased the king, though, and let
-
the king give her royal position to
-
another that is who is better than she.
-
Here's another thing.
-
Both husbands and wives
-
in the flesh when they're not sewing to
-
the spirit will exclusively focus on
-
each other's sin.
-
You need to change. No, you need to
-
change. No, you need to change. No, you
-
need to change. The destination is the
-
foot of the cross. When you get there,
-
and if you're the leader, the husbands
-
are in the marriage. There's a real
-
headship there. It doesn't matter what
-
people say. That's what the Bible says.
-
It should not be controversial. It's
-
pretty straightforward. The leader that
-
gets first to the cross stops saying,
-
"What about the wife you gave me? Oh my
-
gosh, you died for all of my sin. And
-
now you can lead from grace." And you go
-
and instead of saying, "Wife, you need
-
to apologize first."
-
And vice versa. Not until you apologize.
-
You know who's right with the authority
-
of God first? The person who gets to the
-
foot of the cross first. And that's not
-
always going to be the husband, but if
-
you're a leader, it should be regularly.
-
Where are you leading your family?
-
Where's the destination to the cross? If
-
you're not there, you're not leading
-
them there.
-
So, yeah, it's painful.
-
This is also true. Like, not all sins in
-
a fight are totally equal. Like if you
-
say, "Well, um,
-
you don't care about me and uh, you
-
don't you don't even pursue me." This is
-
a husband talking to a wife. And then
-
the wife says back, "Escalated
-
things meant to hurt the husband cuz
-
she's hurt by that." Those escalated
-
things are worse. Maybe not in the sight
-
of God because I think God holds the the
-
leader to a higher standard, but like
-
then the husband will be like, "Well,
-
look how much wrong she did compared to
-
the wrong that I did. She needs to
-
apologize first. wrong. Again,
-
if God's convicting you that you've done
-
something wrong, go to the cross first.
-
Otherwise, you'll have no power granted
-
through his Holy Spirit to lead your
-
wife at all. Have you ever tried to lead
-
someone spiritually while you're not at
-
the foot of the cross? How did that work
-
out for you? Hasn't worked out well for
-
me. There's no power.
-
So, again, these men are trying to make
-
laws. is not the main thing that we
-
learned from Galatians that you can't
-
cause spiritual change as a result of
-
the law. Did not God say righteousness
-
doesn't come through the law. Did he not
-
like let's actually go there. This is
-
Galatians 2 3 2 through3.
-
Not just about initial justification and
-
salvation like you're never made
-
righteous through the law. It was never
-
its intent. It's not even God's law's
-
purpose from him to make you righteous.
-
It's to point out your unrighteousness.
-
Do we have Galatians 3:2? Maybe I didn't
-
give you guys that one. I'll go to it
-
myself if you want to turn there in your
-
Bibles. Um Galatians 3:2 says this.
-
Oh goodness. There it is. Galatians
Galatians 2 chapter mention
-
chapter 2-3. Chapter 3 2-3. Let me ask
-
you only this. Did you receive the
-
spirit by works of the law or by hearing
-
with faith? Verse three, are you so
-
foolish having begun by the spirit,
-
you're now being perfected by the flesh,
-
works of the law? No. So can you by law
-
decree in an effective way that women's
-
would not women's that wives would not
-
have contempt and wrath for their
-
husbands?
-
Zero effect
-
to their spirit.
-
That's not where honor
-
and respect come from
-
they come from the heart and the law
-
will always only point out what's wrong
-
with the heart and the behavior but it
-
cannot does not will not and doesn't
-
even have the intent from God to
-
transform human hearts that's by faith
-
through grace that Paul hammered that
-
with a sledgehammer through Galatians so
-
they cannot achieve the solution to what
-
they're angry and afraid about through
-
the law and mo they still try. It's the
-
way of the world.
-
Verse 20. So when the decree made by the
-
king is proclaimed throughout all his
-
kingdom for it is vast. All women will
-
give honor to their husbands high and
-
low alike. No they won't.
-
No they won't. They might be acting like
-
it because they are afraid of the
-
consequences,
-
but they're not giving the honor a
-
husband actually desires or God actually
-
uh sees as obedience.
-
You can't do it by force.
-
You can't do it by force. Let's just as
-
a reiteration, put the main point one
-
back up. We're we're close to done here.
-
We're going to go back to some of the
-
New Testament passages that talk about
-
what we should actually be obeying.
-
Trusting God completely empowers us to
-
lead without force and follow without
-
contempt. Every husband wants a wife to
-
follow without contempt and every wife
-
wants to be led without force. And you
-
say not every wife.
-
Yes. This what the Bible shows. Women
-
want their husbands to be protective,
-
nurturing, cherishing, loving, and they
-
want them to lead. And so what do you do
-
if they're not being that way? You know,
-
I think one of the fears too is not
-
just, oh, my husband's leading in a
-
control of course of way. One of the
-
fears is like, I don't think my
-
husband's leading at all. I want him to
-
lead. I don't know if some of the wives
-
here feel like that, but let's go back
-
to chapter 3.
-
Likewise, wives, you subject your own
-
husbands of first Peter, sorry. subject
-
you husband so that even if some do not
-
obey the word they may be one without a
-
word by the conduct of their wives when
-
they see your respectful and pure
-
conduct. Would you trust God enough as a
-
wife, as an employee, as a child? Honor
-
your father and mother. It says, would
-
you trust God enough to remain
-
respectful even when your husband, your
-
parents, your boss
-
is not in line in his leadership with
-
God's word? Would you trust him enough
-
to offer him that suffering because it's
-
a gracious thing in his sight?
-
Do not let your adorning be external,
-
the braiding of hair and the putting on
-
of gold jewelry and the clothing you
-
wear, but let your adorning be hidden
-
per the hidden person of the heart with
-
the imperishable beauty of a gentle and
-
quiet spirit which in God's sight is
-
very precious. For this is how the holy
-
women who hoped in God used to adorn
-
themselves by submitting to their own
-
husbands. As Sarah obeyed Abraham,
-
calling him Lord, and you are her
-
children. Did Sarah.
-
Did Abraham always lead in a godly way?
-
No. He made her lie. By the way, that's
-
a sin. She should not have obeyed. She
-
did. But what this is highlighting is
-
her godly character of how she really
-
did follow Abraham. Not a perfect
-
husband.
-
As Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him
-
Lord. And you are her children if you do
-
good. And do not fear anything that is
-
frightening. Do not fear anything is
-
frightening. It's frightening to submit
-
to a husband you know is a sinner. And
-
if you don't know your husband's a
-
sinner, you've got your anthropology
-
wrong. He is.
-
My wife Christine sitting right here. Uh
-
when we were dating, she said, I don't
-
even know what brought the conversation,
-
but she said, "I'm looking for a husband
-
who's worthy for me to submit to." And
-
it just convicted me so deeply. I'm
-
like, "I don't I don't think I am." and
-
I think there's some serious ways I need
-
to grow. And but then I realized, yeah,
-
I really do need to grow in those ways.
-
But I came back to her and I said,
-
I'm never going to be worthy of your
-
submission.
-
The only reason you should ever submit
-
to me is because God said so, not
-
because I'm perfect. The origin has to
-
be complete trust in God. I will fail
-
you. I will do wrong. I will not grow
-
fast enough. There's all these things.
-
It ought not to be an excuse.
-
God's given us everything we need for
-
life and godliness.
-
But is your reason for obeying someone
-
because they're a good person? No such
-
thing, first of all, and secondly, that
-
ought not to be the reason. The reason
-
ought to be God.
-
Likewise, husbands, live with your wives
-
in an understanding way, showing honor
-
to the woman as the weaker vessel, since
-
they are heirs with you of the grace of
-
life, king and queen, so they so that
-
your prayers may not be hindered. God
-
opposes husbands who do not live in an
-
understanding way with their wife. And
-
every husband knows what it's like to be
-
under the authority of a jerk,
-
who doesn't listen to you, and then you
-
still have to or you lose your job
-
basically, and it's just a slog every
-
day. So then, are you treating your wife
-
that way? It's not understanding, and it
-
will hinder your prayers. You're praying
-
for a promotion. Good. I pray for your
-
promotions. I get excited when when
-
people get promoted in their careers and
-
and yet part of it is being in right
-
relationship to authority, your own
-
authority as a leader in this case, but
-
ultimately God's authority. And he says,
-
"Live with your wife as an understanding
-
way." Do you understand that it's
-
frightening to your wife when you don't
-
obey God's word and she so has to
-
submit. Do do you understand that makes
-
her afraid?
-
If you don't understand that, it's
-
topheavy leadership. And man, I don't
-
think I'm sitting here like above the
-
crowd. I'm right there in the pews with
-
you
-
in my heart.
-
So it is really as hard as it sounds. In
-
fact, it is actually impossible. You
-
have to trust God completely.
-
You have to trust him completely.
-
Hebrews also says this in regard one
-
thing we haven't discussed and just for
-
very short before I conclude here with
-
why the cross is the only way you can do
-
this. Hebrews uh chapter 13:17
-
says that it's it's unbelievably
-
important to submit to leaders in the
-
church too. Verse 17, obey your leaders
-
and submit to them for they are keeping
-
watch over your souls as those who have
-
to give an account. Let them do this
-
with joy and not with groaning for that
-
would be of no advantage to you. Any
-
leader in the church has to ultimately
-
give an account to God.
-
Right?
-
So, you know, looking back at first
-
Peter about how like you endure unjust
-
leadership, suffering unjustly, and it's
-
a gracious thing in God's sight. You
-
know, it reminds me of that idea, no
-
good deed goes unpunished. And I'd said
-
that, I don't know who said it to the
-
family, and Ezra is kind of an
-
absolutist like me. He's like, is that
-
really true? And Isaiah is sitting right
-
here who's just absent mindly focusing
-
on something else, but has the brain
-
power to listen halfway on something.
-
and he goes, "Yeah, that's true, but you
-
still have to do good anyway." And then
-
just walks by with a sigh, you know. So
-
12 years of vast experience and the
-
conclusion is yes, when I do good, I get
-
punished and I have to do good more and
-
then I will get punished more and such
-
is life.
-
And there's some truth to that even
-
biblically. We also know it's not
-
ultimately true because God will reward
-
uh even as after the grave all good
-
works. So every good deed will be
-
rewarded. That's the real truth.
-
So I I want you to consider that idea
-
that it's going to cause pain to follow
-
the right way. It's going to cause pain
-
to lead the right way. You can't control
-
your wife. And and you know if I if I
-
had to say something here just towards
-
the end in terms of something that may
-
be convicting for husbands. I don't
-
think in the church today male
-
aggression is the primary problem. I
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believe male passive passivity is. I see
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that way more often. Uh men will hide
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behind the idea of like well I'm not
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supposed to lead with force but they'll
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never even say the thing they need to
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say their wife because it rocks the
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boat. I heard a comedian say and I don't
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remember the punch line so this won't be
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funny but it's the core of what he was
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saying. He goes, "My dad also always
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used to tell me, son, you got to pick
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your battles." And then I watched him
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never pick a battle. And now he's
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wearing a sweater vest he hates. I guess
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that was the funny part after all. Uh
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there's truth in that that you ought to
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pick your battles. Not everything is
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worth having a conflict over. But if
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what you really mean is, "I'm just going
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to mellow out and never lead," that's
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not godly either. You you got to say
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what you need to say and then you got to
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leave it in God's hands.
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That comment, by the way, was true for
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both partners in any authority
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relationship. Got to say what you need
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to say.
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So let's go to the destination which is
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the foot of the cross and let's consider
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how Jesus perfectly exemplified
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the concept of being right in right
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relationship
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to the cross. And then before I forget
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what we're going to do is we're going to
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come to communion considering that
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ourselves. Do we need to repent of the
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way that we've been relating to
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authority? Do we need to repent of the
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way that we've been leading? Do we need
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to repent of the way that we've been
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following? Remember, it's not the
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outward, it's the inward. You got a bad
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attitude and contempt towards leadership
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or you're being coercive towards someone
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in your charge. That's all that's all
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sin that needs to be forgiven and you
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can take that to the the table and we're
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going to do that corporately today. So,
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that means I'll be coming up after the
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next couple songs. So, grab your
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elements, come back. Uh, but during that
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time of worship, really be considering
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what the Holy Spirit's saying to you.
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specifically about First Peter chapter 2
1 Peter 2 chapter mention
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starting in verse 21. That whole idea of
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enduring suffering unjustly while still
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remaining submitted. For to this you
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have been called because Christ also
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suffered for you, leaving you an example
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so that you might follow in his steps.
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He committed no sin, neither was deceit
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found in his mouth. When he was reviled,
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he did not revile in return. When he
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suffered, he did not threaten, but
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continued entrusting himself to the one
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who judges justly. He himself bore our
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sins in his body on the tree, that we
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might die to sin and live to
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righteousness. By his wounds, you have
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been healed. For you were straying like
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sheep, but have now returned to the
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shepherd and overseer of your souls. No
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person who's ever lived has had a
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greater claim to say that's unfair. I
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should not have to submit to I'm
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perfect. I've never done anything wrong
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and now I have to bear the sin
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of everyone who believe. I have to face
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your wrath.
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It was unbelievably painful for Jesus to
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submit to that in the garden.
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sweat like blood,
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overwhelmed the point of death. But he
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did and it was because of the joy set
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before him. And so he is our model. You
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will never have to face a submission as
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terrifying,
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dreadful, and excruciating as bearing
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the wrath of God. But had he not done
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it, none of us would be saved. He was
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willing to be used in that way.
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He laid down his own life.
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So trusting God completely empowers us
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to lead without force and follow without
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contempt. Heavenly Father, thank you for
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this message. I pray that you would
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transform us accordingly.
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You know the work that you want to do in
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our hearts. I pray that that would work
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would have its fulfillment even in a way
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today in Jesus name. Amen.