The Foundational Rule

Good morning, Good News Church. It is good to see you. Today,

we are beginning a brand new series of sermons called How to Handle Relational Drama.

I want to tell you, I'm excited you're excited. I want to tell you a little

bit about the history of this or like kind of the background of this situation

that sort of explains to you how we got to where we are and why we're doing

this series at this time in this way.

Twelve years ago, I did a series on this topic. It had a different title,

but I did a series on this topic. I think it was just like four weeks long.

And that was kind of at the beginning of Good News Church. So 12 years ago.

Then seven years ago, I did another series on this topic.

And that one was a five-week series, if I remember right. And most of them were not the four.

It wasn't just repeated again. It was just a whole nother time where we talked about this issue.

Then five years ago, I wrote a book on this topic.

And at the time that this is available in the lobby, by the way,

for free in the little information thing. Ooh, someone's read it.

That's exciting. I got a reader, y'all.

So when I wrote this book, I was, in fact, this might discourage you from even wanting to go read it.

At the time I wrote it, I liked it. I was like, this is good.

And then as the time has passed, like in the ensuing years, the five years that

have passed in the meantime, I, yeah, ensuing. Did you know I knew that word?

I don't think I even know. I don't know if I used it correctly.

In fact, I just heard someone on TV say it and I tried it.

Anyway, in the five years that have taken place since I came out with this book.

I have read it and I look at it and I go, I'm happy with what I said,

but I really feel like I left stuff out.

There were things that I wish I would have said that I can't go back and like cram it in there now.

So for instance, I wish I had put a chapter early on in this book about being

difficult to offend, okay?

Like how to be a person that is hard to offend. I think that would be good.

One of the things with this book that is fine, but not, I'm just don't love

it as much anymore, is early on in the book. In fact, it starts as early as chapter two.

I talk about how to confront someone who has sinned against you.

Like, how can you rebuke someone that's offended you? And I don't regret what I wrote.

Like, I look back on it, and honestly, it's good. I re-said what Jesus said

about that topic, okay? So I stand behind it, because I just re-said what Jesus said.

But it dawned on me in the meantime that you could teach somebody something

that's true, But if you teach us the wrong person without them knowing other

stuff, then it could be unhelpful.

Like if you talk to a group of people who are easily outraged and you tell them

how to rebuke and how to confront, do you see how it could be a problem?

Even if the stuff you're saying is totally true. And I think we live in a sort

of easily outraged time.

Like it seems to me, or maybe it's an easily outraged country,

but it seems to me like being easily offended is something that a lot of people are good at.

And so to teach people how to rebuke and how to confront without addressing

that first seems like you might be putting a perfectly good tool into the wrong

person's hand, right? And they'll misuse it. Does that make sense?

So I look back and go, man, there's stuff I wish I would have put in here.

So here's the goal. The goal

for this series is to take what we said 12 years ago and take what we taught

seven years ago and take what we wrote down five years ago and add to it stuff

that I've thought about in the meantime and wished I would have put in there

and combine all of that together and give that to you as an 11-week series,

which will be the most comprehensive version that we've ever done on this topic. I like this side.

Sorry, no offense to you guys, but it's going to be the most comprehensive version

that we have ever done on this topic. I'm just kidding. I love you guys lots, okay?

So good, you're not easily offended. All right, you can skip that week.

So anyway, so this should be, I'm not saying it'll be perfectly complete because

I might figure out stuff I forgot later on after that, but I think this will

be the most comprehensive version of it we've ever done. I'm excited about that.

Also, even more importantly than that, this will be an important 11 weeks because

it will be 11 weeks of scripture. Okay.

In other words, we are not changing our preaching strategy here, right?

This is not like an advice series in the sense that I'm going to get up here

and simply talk about what has worked for me relationally, like apart from what the Bible says.

No, this series will revolve around what God's word says about interpersonal conflict.

And so today we're going to begin with what I call the foundational rule. Okay?

The foundational rule. What is the number one rule when it comes to relationships in the Bible?

What's the Bible's number one rule when it comes to relationships?

So that is what we're going to cover today.

But before we get into the foundational rule, I think there's something that

we need to talk about even before we get to that.

And so I'd like to, before we jump into it, I want to address this.

Why do we even need a rule? Like you might be here and go, well, that'd be great.

I wanna know how to handle relational drama. And if the Bible does have like

one primary foundation rule above them all, yeah, I wanna know what that is.

That's great. I intend on telling you.

But first, let's ask ourselves the question, well, why do we need it?

Why do we need instructions on this topic?

Why isn't it the case that when we bring up relationships, we all just say,

oh, relationships? All my relationships are great.

All my relationships are great because all relationships are always great.

Why is that not the case, right? If we're such good people, why is there so

much relational drama to address?

And we are good people, right? I mean, that's what I've heard.

Have you ever heard that?

Have you ever heard people say we're good people? Yeah, the dominant cry of

much of our culture has for decades now been, I'm good, you're good, and she's good, okay?

There's a lot of that. It's in our movies, it's in our TV shows,

it's in the way we talk. It's in the way Christians talk.

I have heard Christians say things like, you know, well, they just did a bad

thing, but they're a good person on the inside. I've heard Christians say things

like, well, you don't wanna shame her because she needs to know she's a good

person or don't judge him, right?

Because he's a good person that just did a bad thing, right?

I mean, I've heard pastors say things like that.

And I assume not just Christians believe it. I bet you people who say they're

Buddhists believe it. I bet you there's atheists and agnostics that believe that.

Like a lot of varied sort of worldviews and religious views in this country.

And yet one thing it seems like we all have in common is, I'm good,

you're good, and she's good, okay?

In fact, it seems like we've almost been like brainwashed by this.

Like the popular songs that like come out, like there's a lot of this message

over and over again, and you sing along with it. I don't know if you've noticed

it, but go ahead and Google it if you want.

If you Google like self-esteem songs, empowerment songs, love yourself songs,

like you will notice there are a ton of them. I'm just gonna show you a few, okay?

Have you ever heard this one? I'm just gonna give you the lyrics, okay?

Because baby, you're a firework. Come on, show them what you're worth.

Who's heard that song? Yeah. Now, what is the point of that song?

The point of that song is if you think you're a bad person, if you're sort of

down on yourself, if you feel like a plastic bag in the wind or whatever the

first verse says, you need to know that's not true.

You're a firework, right? Which is a metaphor, right? You're not literally a firework.

But the point is you are a kind of special kind of person that needs to show

off so that everybody can see what you're worth, how worthy you are, right?

How about this one? This is my fight song.

Take back my life song. Prove I'm all right song, right?

So I'm gonna have to fight for what is mine. I need to take back what's mine

because I need to prove. I need to prove to everybody I'm all right.

And that one is actually fairly humble. All she's trying to do is prove that

she's all right. Some of them go way farther than all right.

Have you heard this one? Pretty, pretty please. Don't you ever,

ever feel like you're less than, less than perfect to me? Have you heard that one?

Yes, you've heard that. Come on. Pretty, pretty, please. Don't you?

You've heard it, right? Now, the woman that's singing that song is singing it

to someone, and they're telling that someone what? They're not telling them

to prove you're all right.

They're not even telling that person that they're good. They're actually saying

you need to believe that you are nothing less than perfect. Whew.

So, I will admit, perhaps these songs were not meant for humanity as a whole, okay?

Maybe Katy Perry doesn't believe everyone's a firework, okay?

Like, if you talk to her, she might say, like, I just wrote that song for firework people.

Not everybody's a firework, okay? And Pink probably, I mean,

almost certainly, she doesn't literally believe that everyone is perfect.

But my point is, the general vibe of our culture leans toward,

I'm good, you're good, and she's good. Okay.

And the reason why is because it's most people are good, right?

I'm good and you're good and she's good because most people are good.

That is the title of a country song by Luke Bryan. Okay. So this is all over

the place. This is everywhere.

And the question is, why is there so much conflict amongst all these good people?

And the Bible answer is, we're not good. Okay.

The point of view from the Bible, really, it's I'm bad, you're bad, and she's bad.

The most famous place where the Bible says this is Romans 3,

23. That's the verse that says, all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.

But really, the place that's most clear in the Bible about this,

I think, would be Romans 3, verses 9 through 18.

Romans 3:9–18

Okay, that's an extended section on the wickedness of humanity.

But for today, I'm going to start in James chapter 4, because James chapter

James 4 · chapter mention

four, verse one, there's actually a verse that connects our natural desires

on the inside of us with our interpersonal conflicts. So I'm gonna go ahead

and start with that one instead of the one in Romans.

So if you have your Bible, go to James chapter four.

I'm gonna read to you first one of the chapter. James chapter four begins this way.

What is the source of wars and fights among you?

Don't they come from the cravings that are at war within you?

Isn't that interesting? James says the fights that you have on the outside of

you come from desires that you have on the inside of you.

How does this work? Let me give you an example.

Before I was an adult pastor, I was a youth pastor for years.

And whenever the summer came, I would take the kids in my youth group to summer camp.

And the summer camp that I liked the most, that I took the kids to most often

was, it was up in Panama City Beach.

And so we would get the kids in the church van, we'd drive up to Panama City

Beach, we'd go to the camp. It was very fun. And.

So when we got to camp, the thing that was cool about this camp is it was right

there on the beach. It was set in a hotel.

And so you could play on the beach all day. And then there were camp meetings

at night. And the camp meetings were like these higher energy,

very exciting things, tons of kids. It was high school camp only.

So all these high schoolers came in. I would guess maybe it was like 1500 high

schoolers all at the same time in this hotel conference center.

In fact, I think it was like, probably like four conference rooms that they

took all the walls out and made it into this big giant thing.

And so the kids would all rush in there and sit on these chairs.

And the chairs are facing this, it's like a concert. There was a big stage.

And there would be musicians that would come out on the stage and they would

play worship music for the kids, but like real like high energy,

you know, youthy vibe kind of music.

And the kids really liked that. And then a speaker would come out and talk about the Bible.

And so what would happen is the kids would, you know, play around in the day

and then they wanted to get good seats for the meeting.

And so they would, when the doors would open, everyone would kind of rush to

get the best seats that they could.

Cause there wasn't like, you didn't, it's not like a concert where you get a

ticket that says row B, seat seven or anything like that. It's just general admission.

And so some of these high school students would stand outside the doors for

like an hour, hour and a half, so that when the doors open, they were the first

people to go in there and get good seats.

And the point of it, the reason why sometimes it was worth waiting for an hour

and rushing on in there is because it's not like you were just trying to rush

in and find a good seat for you. You showed up there as youth groups.

So you're trying to find 12 seats. You're not even trying to find the best seat.

You're just trying to find a space where 12 seats are all together so the whole

youth group can all sit together. at least if it was a 12-person youth group.

That's what it was in my case.

I believe it was me and Heidi as the two adult leaders, and I think we had 10

kids with us. So we had like a 12-person youth group.

So as we opened the doors and ran in, like we're trying to find 12 seats altogether.

So we did, we waited however long we waited, doors opened, we went in,

and the kids found 12 seats altogether, and they sat down in them.

And then this lady showed up.

This lady walks up and she goes up to my kids in my youth group and tells them

to move, to get up and go sit somewhere else because those seats were reserved for her youth group.

Okay, so the kids, I guess, were conditioned to like, you know,

listen to what adults say.

And so they got up and they started looking for other seats.

And I went up to my kids and said, hey, why are you getting up?

This is where we're sitting as a group. They said, no, that lady said,

we got to leave. These are for her youth group.

We got to go sit somewhere else. Well, I did not like that.

And so I walked up to the lady. And I said, what are you doing?

And she said, I'm here to save these seats for my youth group.

And she gestured to like this huge swath of seats. Okay. Like probably like 40 chairs.

Okay. So keep in mind, my 12 kids are like physically there sitting in the 12

seats, sitting in the 12 seats.

This lady, I don't know. She may sound like she's got 40 kids in her youth group.

I don't even know if they exist. I didn't see them.

She's there by herself standing among 40 empty chairs and with her one body

claiming that all 40 of these chairs belong to her group.

And so I said to her, and I don't remember exactly what I said to her.

It might be more aggressive than this.

But I said something along the lines of, I don't understand how your 40 theoretical

children have more of a right to these chairs than my 12 actual children who

are here sitting in them.

Impeccable logic, is it not? She did not think so.

She stuck with, I was told to come down here and hold these 40 chairs and these

40 chairs are from, you know, from my youth group and, you know, and I, this is not right.

And so I was getting very frustrated with her. And at this point,

I believe my wife starts grabbing my elbow and starts pulling me away saying,

hey, let's, it's not worth, don't fight about it. Let's just go sit somewhere else, right?

And I was thinking, no, no, this is exactly the time to fight about it.

Like, this is my fight song, take back my chair song.

And so I was just so ready to confront this lady. She's like,

it's not worth it. Don't do it. And I'm like, no, this is the place to draw the line and the sand.

And so I acquiesced. I went with Heidi and we went to find some other spot.

But before I did, I looked at the lady one last time. I just stood there and I looked at her.

Okay. And then she stood there just looking at me, sinning.

And And there was that moment, nothing was said, and then I walked off,

but we were just staring at each other.

And we probably, to outsiders, we probably looked like we were ready to gouge

each other's eyes out, okay?

And this happened at Jesus' camp.

I don't even know what they do at Satan camp. Must be terrible,

because that's what happened at Jesus' camp.

Now, why did that happen? I want you to think about this. We are talking about

the meeting of two Christians, two people who not only love Jesus,

but are leaders in their respective churches.

And probably those are the people that were in our life would not have called us bad people.

And yet there we are looking like we wanna do bodily harm to one another. Why?

The Bible describes in Galatians chapter five that there is a war within us.

In fact, James says that, right? The wars and fights among you,

don't they come from the cravings that are at war within you?

Galatians chapter five, which you can read on your own, verses 16 all the way

to verse 26, talks about this war that's on the inside of us or the struggle

that we have on the inside of us.

And the way that Paul talks about it in Galatians is the struggle between the spirit and the flesh.

That there is this war within you, this struggle, there is the spirit, that is God within you.

That is the thing within you or the one within you who wants to point you to

doing that which is right, that which is God's will.

And then there's your flesh. Your flesh is that part of you that wants to do

that which is selfish and that which is what you think is best for you and that which is sinful.

And the desires of our flesh can lead us to, that's my chair.

No, that's my chair. Well, we can't both fit in at the same time.

So now what do we do? We fight.

We fight. And that impulse that's inside of me is inside of every single one of us in this room.

That impulse is in every single one of us between now and when Jesus returns

to glorify us and remake us.

And that impulse has the potential to destroy any relationship in your life

if the conditions are right.

For instance, that's my chair. No, that's my chair.

So with all of that said let's look at the foundational rule it's found in matthew

Matthew 22 · chapter mention

chapter 22 starting in verse 35 if you have your bible turned there this is

going to be we'll spend more time in this one this is jesus speaking and jesus

is having actually a conversation with a pharisee,

the pharisee asked him a question and jesus answers the question this is that

account and one of them, an expert in the law asked a question to test him.

Teacher, which command in the law is the greatest?

He said to him, so here's Jesus' answer. Love the Lord your God with all your

heart, with all your soul and with all your mind.

This is the greatest and most important command. And the second is like it,

love your neighbor as yourself.

All the law and the prophets depend on these two commands.

This is the moment where Jesus taught us what the most important rules are.

They asked him what was the most important command. He answered by giving them

bonus information. He told them number one and number two.

The most important rules to follow, the most important are love God with all of your everything.

And number two, love others as you love you.

Our church's mission statement, which is love God, love each other,

and love people who don't know God yet is based on this teaching of Jesus Christ.

And then if you notice what he says after he says it, He says,

all the law and the prophets depend on these two commands, okay?

That is all of the other rules, all of the other teachings, they hang on these two.

In fact, when you think about all of the other commands, it seems that they

are all subcategories under these two headings.

Whether you're talking about why you shouldn't worship idols or why you shouldn't

take the Lord's name in vain or whether you're talking about why you shouldn't

covet or honor your father and mother, like all of those commands fall under

love God and love your neighbor,

right? They're all sub subcategories under those headings.

Now we have done sermons here at this church before on the first commandment,

love the Lord your God with all your heart.

So it is the second command that we are going to focus on this morning.

Okay. Command number one that Jesus gives is the most important command because

it covers our relationship with God.

Command number two is the second most important command because it covers our

relationship with everybody else, which means commandment number two is the

most important command regarding relationships. Are you following me?

It's the second most important command overall, but it is the number one command

for human relationships.

And so that is why I'm calling it the foundational rule. And that is why we

are beginning a series on relationships with it, because this is the number

one way that humans are to relate to each other.

Now, before we move on, now let me go ahead and explain what the law of God does.

Because the Pharisee that came to Jesus, that's what he brought up.

He said, which command in the law is the greatest?

Well, why is there a law? Why does God's law exist?

Why would he say, do this, don't do that? Okay, what is the purpose of the law?

And I would say this, one of the primary purposes of God's law,

I believe this, one of the primary purposes of God's law is to show us that

we are bad so that we turn to God as our savior.

You see, if there were no rules, if there was no morality, then there would

be nothing by which to judge good and bad.

There would be nothing by which to judge right and wrong.

And so the reason for love God and love your neighbor and don't murder and don't

steal and don't lie is to reveal to us our wickedness and point us to a savior.

To use a medical analogy, the law of God is what diagnoses us as diseased so

that we seek out the correct remedy, Jesus Christ. Yeah.

So one reason that God tells us to love him and to love each other is so that

we will fail at it and then seek his forgiveness and power, like be empowered to be able to reconcile,

like to be reconciled with him and to be reconciled with one another.

The law of God is supposed to lead us to the gospel.

But that's not the only use of the law, okay? I think there's another use of

the law and you can see this because this same command, love your neighbor as

yourself, comes up again later in scripture.

And it seems in that particular case, it's not something that's just lead people

who don't know God to God. So I want you to see it.

This is Galatians chapter five. So flip over just a little bit to Galatians if you're in your Bible.

Galatians five, I'm gonna start reading in verse 13. I'm gonna read Galatians 5, 13 to 15.

And there should be a part of it that sounds familiar to you because you're

gonna see Paul quoted from the same place Jesus quoted from, the same thing.

So he says this, for you were called to be free. Now keep in mind,

this is Paul, apostle, like Christian Bible teacher. He's writing to a group of Christians.

So when he says, for you were called to be free brothers, the word brothers

there is like a hint that he's talking to Christians here, okay?

And he had just been talking about them, how they were called to be free from

the Mosaic law, that there were parts of Moses' law that were specifically for ancient Hebrew people.

And they were like civil and ceremonial laws that they were to do as a people.

And he was saying, you're free from those. He had been saying that in the letter.

You were called to be free, brothers, only don't use this freedom as an opportunity for the what?

The flesh, which we already talked about, right? That's that part of you that

has these cravings, right? That wants to do what you think is best for you.

Don't use this freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but serve one another through love.

For the entire law is fulfilled in one statement.

Love your neighbor as yourself. But if you bite and devour one another,

watch out, or you will be consumed by one another.

So we see that Paul's quoting the same thing that Jesus did,

love your neighbor as yourself.

Now you might notice this is a little different in case you caught this,

I might as well point it out. Some of you might've noticed, you might go, wait a minute.

Didn't Jesus say that the whole law was dependent on two statements?

And then here we have Paul saying the entire law is fulfilled in one statement.

What's the deal with that? Is that some kind of contradiction?

So I would say this, first of all, yes, that is the difference between the way

Jesus said it on that occasion and the way Paul said it on this occasion.

And technically, I would say Jesus is the one who is more precisely correct.

However, I don't think Paul is wrong, okay? I think what Paul is doing here

is the same thing I was doing earlier, which he is saying that love your neighbor

is the most important command that encompasses all the other commands when it

comes to the way that we're supposed to treat each other, right?

Yes, there's a command above it, but when it comes to how we are supposed to

relate to each other, it is the most important command that covers all the rest

of them, which is the topic he's talking about at this point,

how they treat one another, right?

So he repeats this command. Jesus said, love your neighbor as yourself.

Maybe about 20 years later, Paul says the same thing. Love your neighbor as yourself.

So this repeating of this command, especially in this context where he's saying

it to Christians, I think it shows us something.

It means this law, this command exists.

Not only to point non-Christians to Jesus as Savior and Lord,

but this law also exists because God wants his people to obey it. Are you following me?

God wants his people to actually do it, to try to obey it as best as they can with God's help.

Therefore, this is the number one relational rule. That's why I'm saying it's the foundational rule.

This is the number one relational rule for Christians and non-Christians.

Now, there's one last thing I want to point out about this rule.

I think it's really good, really insightful, really helpful.

But I think the way that you will see it best is if I've shared two other verses with you.

And then when you can see all the verses side by side, I think you will be able

to see what it is that's sort of special about this.

So I'm going to read to you from Luke chapter six and from Philippians chapter

two, and then Matthew chapter 22, and hopefully you'll see what they all have in common.

Matthew 22 · chapter mention

So let's look at these verses. So let's start with the one in Luke.

Luke 631 says this, just as you want others to do for you, do the same for them.

Now this is Jesus speaking.

Jesus doing a sermon and he says these words, and this probably is the most

famous thing that Jesus ever said.

It became known as the golden rule, although it became famous under a different

phrasing than this because it was written in older English.

So you may have heard it as, do unto others as you would have them do unto you,

okay? Because that's how people talked 400 years ago, okay?

Do unto others as you would have them do it. Jesus didn't say it that way.

He didn't even speak English. Okay.

400 years ago, they translated into English, do unto others as you would have

them do unto you, which means the same thing is just as you want others to do

for you, do the same for them.

Jesus taught this, probably the most famous thing he ever taught.

Now let's go forward about maybe 20 years or so. And Paul is writing to the Philippians.

He's telling them how they are supposed to treat each other.

And I want you to notice what he says in Philippians chapter two, verse three.

Okay. It says, do nothing out of rivalry or conceit, but in humility,

consider others as more important than yourselves.

So we're not supposed to have this rivalry over the chair, right?

Rather we go, okay, fine. You're more important than I am, right?

In humility, consider others as more important than yourselves.

That's how he tells the Philippians to treat each other.

Now let's look at Matthew chapter 22, the foundational rule, okay?

Matthew 22 · chapter mention

What did Jesus say? He said, and the second is like it, love your neighbor as yourself.

Now, when you see all three of them on the screen at the same time,

do you see what they all have in common?

There's something that all three of these verses have in common.

Do you see what they have in common? Do you see it? You.

Luke chapter 6 verse 31 does not say treat others well. It says treat them like

Luke 6:31

you would want to be treated.

Philippians chapter 2 doesn't say consider other people to be important.

Philippians 2 · chapter mention

It says consider other people to be more important than you.

And Matthew chapter 22 doesn't say love your neighbor a lot.

Matthew 22 · chapter mention

It says love your neighbor the way you love you.

It seems to me that these verses are saying that this self-love that we have,

this self-importance that we have that's on the inside of us,

apparently it can be used in a good way, right?

We've already talked about how it could be used in a bad way, right?

The self-importance that we have and these cravings that we have inside of ourselves,

they can lead to fights and quarrels and wars.

They can lead us to bite and devour one another. But apparently our self-love

and our self-importance could also be used as the standard for how you treat other people.

They can actually, like the self-love that you have can actually be,

like it can inform us as to exactly how we ought to handle others.

We say, well, how should I handle them? Oh, you have this built-in information.

It's this love you have for you.

So you're sitting there going, well, how should I handle this situation? I don't know.

Well, you ask yourself, how would I wanna be treated, right?

How would I want to be valued?

Well, what does that look like? Let me give you an example. When Heidi and I

were early on in our marriage, we went to this fancy hotel. I don't even remember

what it was for. Maybe we were on vacation.

It was before we had kids. It was back when we were living in Texas.

And so it was in Dallas and it was, I brought it the fanciest hotel I'd ever

been in at the time, maybe even since then.

Huge lobby and there were like stores in the lobby of this hotel that sold stuff.

So we checked into our room and then we walked back to the elevators to go up

to our room. and as we walked back to the elevators, we passed some of these

stores and one of them, I guess, was a bakery.

I don't remember for sure. I just remember the thing that was on display.

There was a blueberry muffin that was on display.

And so I walked past it. We didn't have time to do anything about it at the

time, but I just walked past this muffin as it was going to the elevators and

I took a note like, I want some of that later.

And then got on the elevator, went up, did whatever we were doing for that vacation.

I don't remember, but then we went to bed that night.

The next morning I woke up. I woke up before Heidi did. So she was asleep in bed.

And I woke up, and you want to know the first thing I thought to myself?

I woke up and I thought, oh, you know what I want right now?

That blueberry muffin. In fact, I don't just want that blueberry muffin.

I don't want to have to get out of bed.

I wish someone would like put on, go down to the lobby clothes,

and go to the elevator and go down there and walk down the hall and buy that

muffin and walk down the hall again and take the elevator up and come to my room.

And I just want them to hand me the blueberry muffin And so I don't even have to roll out of bed.

I would just be sitting where I am right now, not moving at all.

And then just get handed this muffin in bed.

Oh man, that would be so awesome. Okay.

I have enough self-love and self-importance within me that that's the first

thing I thought about when I woke up.

Okay, now, what do I do with that? Okay, well, here's what I did on this occasion.

I got up and I put on my go into the lobby clothes and I went down the elevator

and I walked down the hall and I bought that muffin.

And I went down the hall, and I took the elevator up, and I walked back into the room.

And when my wife woke up, I handed her the muffin, okay?

I know, isn't it sweet? Here's the thing. I do not always do the right thing, okay?

But on this occasion, I did. And the reason I'm telling the story is not to

say, oh, look how great I am. I'm telling the story because the next thing that

happened, I don't think I will ever forget.

As I handed Heidi the muffin, she said to me something like this,

oh, this is exactly what I wanted. How did you know?

You want to know how I knew because it's exactly what I wanted that's how I knew.

That's how this works. So that is point number one, okay? That is the foundational rule.

And even if that rule is not explicitly mentioned in all of the sermons that

come after this one, because we've got 10 more to go.

I don't know if it will be explicitly mentioned, but I feel like the principle

that's within that rule, it will be there throughout the rest of this series.

And so that's why we needed to start with it. If you're here today and you are

not a Christian, I would encourage you to try it.

Love your neighbor as yourself, okay? For a couple of reasons.

Number one, it will not be bad for you, probably. I don't think it will be bad for you.

Number two, and this is maybe even more important, if you're not a Christian, I want you to try it.

And when you fail, and you will fail, I hope that it will point out for you your need for a savior.

Like you're gonna sit there and go, I wanna do this and then realize,

wow, I can't do this consistently. What's wrong with me? Aha,

there is, there is something wrong with you.

And so I hope that as you fail, it will point your need for a savior so that

you will seek out the forgiveness that you need and the empowerment that you need from God.

And for those of you who are here and you are Christians, I encourage you to do it.

Love your neighbor as yourself because this rule does not exist only to point

people to receive Jesus, right?

This is a rule also for Christians to obey.

You can leverage your self-love for the good of your relationships and as a

way to honor God and do his will.

How great is that? All right, we got more to come. Let's pray for now.

Lord, thank you so much,

for all that you revealed to us. Thank you that James would talk about the cravings

we have within us and that Paul would tell the Galatians about struggles they

have within them and the way that they shouldn't bite and devour one another.

And a Pharisee would ask Jesus about the greatest command and Jesus would tell

them even stuff they didn't ask.

Thank you that we can look at things in Philippians and look at things in Matthew

and look at things in Luke and see what they have in common.

I just thank you for all this.

So I pray for those of us in this room who do not know you yet.

I pray that as we try to love our neighbor as ourself, we will see that we need

you, that we need you for forgiveness for every time we have not done that.

And that we need you to be a different kind of person than we are.

So I pray that there'd be people who'd come to know you over these next several weeks.

I also pray for those of us who do know you. I pray that you would like revamp,

refurbish, restore our relationships, like in this church.

I pray you'd make us a church of people who we love our neighbor as ourself.

And I'm sure there are people in this room that they have like relational issues

that are going on right now. Like they already, there's already a problem.

There's already things they're thinking about with relationships in their life.

Like before they walked in today.

And I pray that your word would be applied to their life. I also know because

of just the way time and the world works, over the next 11 weeks,

there will be relational issues that come up.

And I pray that you would help us that we would apply your word to those situations as they come up.

We thank you for the gospel. We thank you that the rule wasn't given so that

we could get you to accept us. We'd never be able to do it that way.

And so I thank you for your grace. Jesus, thank you for dying on the cross for our lack of love.

And I pray that you would help us to be people who obey your commands,

not to be accepted by you, but because we have been accepted by you and we wanna

please you and we wanna love you and we wanna live the way that you want us to live.

And so we ask these things in Jesus' name, amen. Let me end with these good

words from God's word. This is actually from Ephesians chapter five.

Therefore be imitators of God as dearly loved children and walk in love as the

Messiah also loved us and gave himself for us, a sacrificial and fragrant offering

to God. That is good news.