Thomas: Leaving Doubt Behind

As we sit, let's bow our heads and pray together.

Our gracious Father, we thank you for your word.

And Lord, having discerned that word, we pray that in the grace of the Holy Spirit, we might be obedient to your calling in Christ Jesus, our Lord. Amen.

So, there is so much, I think, to thank God for in the life of the churches in Swindon, and in particular, Christ Church.

I spend a lot of my time, given the number of vacancies that they've been in the deanery, preaching across different churches.

And some of those churches are not even Church of England churches.

And I see green shoots of growth everywhere I go.

So, the thing is that if you total up across the 10 plus congregations in this town,

how many people are actually in church this Sunday morning, you would be pushed to find more than 850 people.

And that in a population of around about 23,000 people.

As Jesus said, the harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few.

And I've got to talk to you today on the issue of doubt, leaving doubt behind.

And I want to start with a verse from Scripture.

And it goes like this.

Very truly, I tell you, whoever believes in me will do the works I've been doing.

And they will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father.

I hope you noticed that.

They, that is, us who are disciples of Jesus, will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father.

Now, in very conservative churches, they interpret these greater things as simply the conversion of people throughout history.

They say that is the beginning and end of the greater works that Jesus was talking to.

If you go into churches that we label as charismatic, they're more inclined to take it more literally.

And truly believe that God wants to bring signs and wonders to accompany the preaching of his word,

in order that his word is given energy by those signs and wonders.

And then, there are a heck of a lot of churches, neither conservative nor charismatic,

who quietly ignore this verse.

You will do even greater things.

Sometimes I think, remember I've had a ministry preaching across the Church of England.

Sometimes I think the Church of England hasn't got the memo.

I want to talk to you about doubt this morning.

And throughout history, philosophers, theologians, writers of literature,

have had a rather ambivalent idea of doubt.

Is it totally a bad thing?

And I'm just going to put up there three quotes for you now.

The first is by the prophet Khalil Gibran, who said this,

Doubt is a pain too lonely to know that faith is his twin brother.

Kind of neutral position, I would think.

Paul Tillich, the American systematic theologian, wrote this,

Doubt isn't the opposite of faith.

It is an element of faith.

He saw doubt as something very positive.

And Frederick Buchner, the moral rearmament leader, wrote this,

Doubts are the ants in the pants of faith.

They keep it awake and moving.

So you can see from those three quotes,

people are not saying that all doubt is wrong.

And therefore, when I saw the title of today's talk,

Leaving Doubt Behind,

it just made me a little wary.

Though in general, I hope we would agree that leaving our doubts behind is a good thing.

Jesus, at one point, confronted a child who had been convulsed with an evil spirit.

And this is a really reckless boy's life.

He had frequent seizures and was throwing himself around on the ground.

And Jesus' disciples tried to heal it, heal the boy.

And they couldn't.

And in response to that,

Jesus sounds like he's taking a rather harsh line over doubt.

And he says this,

You unbelieving generation, Jesus replied,

How long shall I stay with you?

How long shall I put up with you?

Bring the boy to me.

They brought the boy to Jesus,

and he was healed.

See, Jesus mostly says that doubt,

that a lack of faith is part of our problems.

And then Jesus says some very optimistic words for us,

in Mark 9 and verse 23.

If you can, said Jesus,

everything is possible for one who believes.

And then the words of this man,

who is nameless, we don't know who he is.

But I suspect he reflects

where a lot of you are

in relation to faith and doubt.

The man said,

I believe.

Help my unbelief.

We're not quite sure exactly what he meant,

but somehow those words seem to enshrine, I think,

where many of us are in our walk of faith.

And then, of course, we come to dear Thomas,

doubting Thomas, as we call him.

Thomas said to Jesus,

unless I see the nail marks in his hands

and put my finger where the nails were

and put my hand into his side,

I will not believe.

And you remember, as John read it to us,

that Jesus allows him that indulgence,

and his immediate response is,

my Lord and my God.

And interestingly,

Jesus doesn't give

Thomas a rollicking for this.

He makes a very general comment,

and he said,

blessed are those who have seen and believed,

but also,

blessed are those who have not seen and believed.

In other words,

faith in the Jesus

that nobody in this house this morning has seen

is an even greater blessing

than those disciples of old

who walked around Judea and Galilee with him

and experienced his physical presence.

My own feeling is that

I'm not sure that we will ever

totally extinguish doubt of some sort

in our lives this side of heaven.

And in a way,

that's why we need faith.

We're saved by grace through faith,

by accepting God at his word

and living as though we accept him

at his word.

So,

here are some reasons

that I observe for people's doubt.

The first is

the fear

of feeling let down.

I sometimes think

that many of us

don't like to ask God for too much

because we're not sure

what we'd feel

if God didn't deliver

on what we want.

There are people

and there'll be some people

in the house this morning

and I pray God will heal you today

who sit there

and if they can

search their hearts,

they know

that they're angry with God.

Why did he take away

my husband,

my wife,

my child?

How could he let that happen?

My guess is

there are people in this church

for whom those questions

shine very brightly

in their hearts.

They feel,

to quote a technical

theological phrase,

God has dealt them

a tough set of marbles.

Then there is

the fear

of letting others down.

I've never forgotten that

I used to be younger

and even brasher

and

I used to

be in a tiny church

and there was myself

and two ladies

who constituted,

well,

mostly,

most of the congregation actually

but we were the little

team

that went out

and prayed with people

on this estate

in Slough.

I know.

And so we go out

and the first time

I went out

I remember praying

with this lady

and I prayed this prayer.

I mean,

it was right out

of left field.

It was extraordinarily

faithful

and the three of us

said amen

at the end of it

but I suspect

that that was code

for good luck

with that.

And after it

old Edie said to me

she said

do you think

you should pray

so directly to God?

I'm like,

what do you mean?

She said,

well,

the lady you were praying for

might feel very let down.

See,

sometimes

our fear of feeling

let down ourselves

is also a fear

of letting others down.

I suspect

that's why

there's a lot of

ambivalence

in churches

toward the ministry

of healing.

I mean,

it does seem

rather selective

doesn't it?

I mean,

you know,

I say we go to doctors

I mean,

you know,

it's quite a fight

to see a doctor

these days

but we go and see doctors

and we don't,

you know,

they do a diagnosis

if they got it wrong

we don't think

right,

I'm never going

near a doctor

ever again.

Most of us

don't think that.

So,

the fear of letting others down

is a reason

why some of us

doubt

whether or not

we can see

those greater things

done

that Jesus speaks about.

Third thing is

too many prayers

out of the left field

I think can create

a fear in us

that other people

might think

we're fanatics.

I've never forgotten

Ken

who was a member

of the congregation

in Slough

who was a

bus driver.

And I have never,

I mean,

you know,

it's difficult

to kind of measure

from the outside in

exactly how much

faith he had

but by the level

of his prayers

I mean,

this guy was faithful

and then some more.

Faithful to the power

of end.

And I remember

one of his regular

prayers was

Lord,

please,

would you convert

everybody in Slough?

And we'd be like,

wow.

And then he'd say,

today.

And a lot of people,

interestingly,

sidestepped Ken.

It's just a bit,

you know,

is this guy

a kind of,

in terms of faith,

the sort of equivalent

of a Taliban Christian?

You know,

is he completely

over the top?

And I think a lot of us

are frightened

of fearing that.

Fourth thing is

fearing that I'm

just not good enough.

Why would God

bother with me?

Surprisingly,

John Wesley,

those you Methodists

who'll be

feeling aroused now,

John Wesley

suffered from

quite a lot of doubt

in his life,

certainly before

his true conversion.

And he doubted

whether he was

good enough.

he was plagued

by the idea

of joining this club

called the Holy Club

in Oxford.

Rather off-putting name,

I might suggest.

But he joined it.

And they were rigorous

in their self-examination

of themselves

and of each other.

And the net result

of that was,

I think they didn't have

any assurance

of their salvation.

Wesley worried about that

until God

touched his heart.

I wonder

if today

there are some of you

in the house

who aren't sure

whether you're saved.

And I pray

that if that's so,

God would touch

your heart.

And then

there is

the general fear

which exists

in the kind of

post-enlightenment

hugely true

of the Church of England,

but true

of lots of churches.

There is this fear

of talking about

anything supernatural.

You know,

we believe God

can work in the world

but there are limits.

And the limit is

God can only work

within the natural realm.

So of course

God works

in the natural realm.

Aren't you like this?

If you've got appendicitis,

wouldn't you go

and see a doctor?

Or would you just

get your friends around

to pray for you?

Or even better,

would you get your friends

around to pray for you

and go and see a doctor?

Am I wrong?

Would you be mad

not to see a doctor

if you've got

acute appendicitis?

Of course you'd go

to a doctor.

Because God uses

natural means

as well as

supernatural means.

You remember

there's that story

that sounds disgusting

to us in the 21st century

where Jesus

with a blind man

and Jesus

spits,

mix up the paste

in some mud

and then applies it

to these guys' eyes.

This guy's eyes.

And you think to yourself,

wow,

you know,

I'm not sure

what I feel about that.

But at the time

it was thought that

a mixture of alluvial mud

and spit

would heal

for somebody.

My gran,

right,

who brought me up,

wonderful woman,

she used to always say,

I was,

you know,

every living moment

I was playing sport

and we used to play

in school on the tarmac

and every day

I'd go down

and cut my knees.

And that's why

in our school

you couldn't wear

long trousers

until you were

in the fifth floor.

Imagine that.

You've got these great,

you know,

six foot two boys

walking around

in grey shorts

in December.

It's not my point.

My point is,

my gran's remedy

for my cut knees

was let the dog

lick it.

You know,

even then I'm like,

are you sure

about this, gran?

Anyway,

I mean,

it really worked on me

and the only thing is

I dug,

developed a terrible

bloodlust

and killed people

in town.

Just kidding.

Look,

we are,

in many of our churches,

in this kind of

post-enlightenment

cynical era

in which we live.

We've written off

the supernatural

as a possibility

for the way

in which God

might work.

For the reasons

for doubt,

God doesn't always

do what I want

him to.

I'd imagine

that's a big one.

And let me remind you

that Jesus,

when he was in

the Garden of Gethsemane,

I mean,

how powerful

a prayer is this?

He knew what was

going to happen to him.

He'd already been

beaten.

He'd already

been up before

the council.

It was clear that

they wanted him dead.

What was Jesus'

prayer?

Not my will,

but thy will.

Not my will,

but thy will.

See,

I do think that

if you're a new Christian,

this is really tough stuff

and I get that,

but actually,

the longer you become

a Christian,

the more you

are mildly

become familiar

with the words

of our Father

in heaven,

the more you get it

that really

prayers need

to be not selfish.

James says that

in his epistle.

He says,

when you pray,

when you do pray,

you pray from selfish

motives.

You ever done that?

Don't shout out.

God.

So,

I want God to do

what I want him to

and if not,

I'll take a bad

attitude towards God.

Second,

this is Thomas,

isn't it?

The need for

empirical evidence.

Empiricism

means that

I will only

accept things

that I can

observe

through my

senses.

So,

I believe it

if I can see it.

I'll believe it

if I can smell it.

I'll believe it

if I hear it.

And Thomas,

I think like many

of us,

when he'd not

seen the risen Christ,

he'd just been told

that Jesus is alive.

And I think

many of us

would feel

a little cynical

about that.

And so,

he says

to Jesus,

is it really you?

You know,

I believe that

if I can put my,

you remember,

they put nails

through Jesus' hands

so he presumably

still had big scars

there and

they pushed

the thing

through his side,

spear through his side.

And it's like,

unless,

unless I can,

physically observe,

take note of

that this really is Jesus,

I'm not going to believe.

I wonder if any of you

are like that,

where you promote

a kind of

faux intellectualism

into a kind of

idol.

And you just doubt.

And unless somebody

can prove to you

the things of God,

you're not going to

buy in.

Third thing is,

the Bible

is an unreliable

document.

Well,

I can tell you this.

I think there's

more in this book

that rings bells

with me

than anything

I've ever read.

And I've read

a lot of books.

I think it tells me

who I am.

It tells me

what I'm like.

It tells me

who God is.

It tells me

who God is like.

It tells me,

having told me

what I'm like

and told me

what God's like,

it tells me

how I can deal

with my sin

in order that I

can enter the

presence of the

Lord,

ascend the hill

of the Lord.

You're saying,

well,

it's a bit

anti-women,

isn't it?

Well,

I mean,

I think there is

a measure of that

and yet,

on the other hand,

it was Paul

who's blamed

to be the kind

of founder

of the patriarchy

as far as

some feminists

are concerned.

It was Paul

who said,

in Christ,

there is neither

male nor female.

That was a radical

statement

at that time

for Paul

to have said that.

When I was a

kid,

I was made to go

to a beach

mission one day

and we sang

this song,

the best book

to read is the

Bible.

I sang it,

I mean,

I'd never read

the Bible,

as a matter of

fact,

but I sang it.

It was a good

tune.

And I think

if you doubt

the truth of

God's word,

you are going

to find progress

in the Christian

life very

difficult.

Confusion.

This is a really

subtle one.

In Mark

Mark 11 · chapter mention

chapter 11,

Jesus is

with his

disciples and

they're walking

past a fig tree

which Jesus

had cursed

the previous

day.

And Peter

notes,

oh,

Master,

the fig tree

you cursed

has perished.

Funny,

isn't it?

We're always

surprised when

God does what

he says he'll

do.

And Jesus

goes off on

one.

He says,

have faith in

God.

And in the

Greek,

the emphasis

in that

sentence is

on the word

God.

I think a lot

of preachers

put an

emphasis on

the word

faith.

But you

see,

we're not

called to

have faith

in faith.

It's not an

issue of how

big is my

faith.

You know,

am I big

enough to

dare to say

amen to this

prayer?

It's not

like that.

faith is

not a

kind of

abstract

matter like

gas or

something.

In fact,

Jesus said,

didn't he,

if you have

faith the

size of

what?

A mustard

seed.

How big is

a mustard

seed?

I have never

grown mustard,

but I'm told

it's a very

small seed.

So presumably,

Jesus said,

you don't need

a lot of

it, but

presumably, you

need enough

that if you're

praying for

something, you

don't let doubt

be the kind of

driving factor of

what you're

praying for.

And I think a

lot of people get

confused into

putting their

faith in faith

rather than in

God.

It's have faith

in God.

That's a

confusion.

And the

final thing

is the

kind of

currency of

our time,

cynicism.

Anything

that's been

handed down

to me,

anything that

comes from

the past,

any talk of

our country

being a great

country,

anything like

that, and

we're not

going to

believe it.

In fact,

it's almost

as if you

feel that if

anything is

what we might

call traditional,

it's going to

be junked.

it's going to

be junked.

Friends,

how are we

going to leave

doubt behind

us?

Well, let me

say, I don't

think all doubt

is bad.

It makes us

inquiring, it

makes us want

to think more.

I get all

that.

But I think

the balance of

our discipleship

needs to put the

weight on

confidence in

God.

So, four

things that

we need to

do.

And the

first thing I

want to say

about this,

really important,

is that very

often when

Jesus castigates

people for

their lack of

faith, he

doesn't do it

on a one-to-one

basis.

He says,

as that

first slide

showed,

a faithless

generation.

Come back

to that.

So, I

think the

first thing we

need to do,

and you can

start today,

is to say

with that

unnamed man

of old,

Lord, I

believe, but

please help

my unbelief.

Help me.

And some

of us find it

difficult to

say that

terrible four

letter word,

help.

But maybe we

should just

review that.

Second,

it's just so

important.

Together we

need to tell

stories of

God's

faithfulness.

I read a

book some

years ago

written by a

radically

liberal

American

theologian.

Her name

was Elaine

Padgels.

And one of

the good

questions she

asked in

that book

was, what

did the

early

Christians

do before

they had

the Bible

in its

complete form

to preach

for?

And she

said they

told stories.

They told

stories of

the faithfulness

of God

and at the

same time

they told

stories of

martyrdom.

That's what

kept the

faith alive,

says Elaine

Padgels,

before we

had the

final canon

of the

Old

Testament

and in

particular

the New

Testament.

Do we

tell enough

stories to

each other?

have we

got a

right

context

in order

that we

give ourselves

space to

tell stories

to each

other about

the

faithfulness

of God?

Third,

I put it

like this,

make

faithful

memories.

There's a lot

of talk these

days about

making memories

which as far

as I can

see involves

Instagram.

what I

mean is

why don't

you try

and put

yourself

in a

position

whereby

if you're

going to

follow through

on what

you've

decided

you're

going to

need to

apply some

faith.

It might

be that

you've got a

terrible

lurking fear

that God

might be

calling you

to something

you don't

fancy.

why don't

you put

yourself in

a position

where you

really test

that with

God.

You might

be in a

position where

you're

careful with

money.

Again,

old

Protestant

virtue.

And maybe

the church

has a need.

Well, you

heard about

one this

morning and

God

fleetingly

touched

your heart

and said,

I ought to

help with

this.

Put

yourself in

a position.

I'm

amazed by

the sheer

middle

classness of

so many

churches

these days.

People will

tell you when

there's an

appeal out

for maybe

another staff

member in

a church

or something

critical to

its development.

People say,

I'd like to

help, I

can't afford

it.

here's my

advice.

Don't go

on two

cruises.

Put

yourself in

a position.

Make

faithful

memories.

And then

finally,

faithless

generation,

said Jesus.

it really

is going

to help

the work

of God

in our

church and

in this

town if

we commit

together.

Jesus

didn't rip

into Thomas

and give

him a,

you know,

verbal good

hiding for

his empirical

desire to

get proof.

believe.

What he

did was,

he made

a comment

to a

community,

blessed

if you

believe and

you've seen

me, but

more blessed

are you

if you've

not seen

me and

believe.

I can't

believe deep

down inside

that there

aren't

some of

us, at

least,

maybe all

of us,

who would

love to

see those

greater works

of God.

Not just

as something

that happens

so rarely

that a

person can

write a

book about

it, but

it would

become so

much part

of our

everyday

experience

as

disciples

that it

could not

could not

if that

were right,

sorry, if

that were

our life

together.

It could

only impact

our community

positively.

850

people in

church,

23,000

people in

town.

I'm

on to

it.

And I'm

looking for

people to

help me.

Faithful,

praying,

people who

are relegating

doubt to

the substitute's

bench and

believing

God's

word and

then living

as though we

take him at

his word.

Let's pray

together.

Amen.

just leave

a few

moments

silence

that the

Holy Spirit

might bring

us

conviction

of what we need to do.

So Father, I pray for your people

gathered in your house this morning.

And Lord, I pray that your Holy Spirit

would touch their hearts.

Lord, I'm thinking of those who feel

that they've been badly let down by you.

I'm thinking about those who are frightened

to deploy more faith in you

because they're frightened that if they did that,

you might let them down

or they might let others down.

Father, I pray then for those who are cynical

for those who, with Thomas,

are looking for the kind of proof

that actually they'll never get.

And Lord, we pray that

whatever our strengths

and whatever our weaknesses are

as a congregation,

we may not be found wanting

in relation to trusting you.

So come, Holy Spirit.

Touch the hearts of your faithful people

and help us as far as we're able

this side of heaven to leave doubt behind.

And we pray these things in Jesus' name.

And the people said,

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.