The Cost of Discipleship: Family, Fear, and Faith

The Holy Gospel according to Matthew, the 10th chapter.

Glory to you, O Lord.

Jesus said to the Twelve,

A disciple is not above the teacher, nor a slave above the master.

It is enough for the disciple to be like the teacher, and the slave like the master.

If they have called the master of the house Beelzebub, how much more will they malign those of his household?

So have no fear of them, for nothing is covered up that will not be uncovered,

and nothing secret that will not become known.

What I say to you in the dark, tell in the light.

And what you hear whispered, proclaim from the housetops.

Do not fear those who kill the body, but cannot kill the soul.

Rather fear the one who can destroy both soul and body in hell.

Are not two sparrows sold for a penny?

Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father.

And even the hairs of your head are all counted.

So do not be afraid. You are of more value than many sparrows.

Everyone, therefore, who acknowledges me before others, I also will acknowledge before my Father in heaven.

But whoever denies me before others, I also will deny before my Father in heaven.

Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth.

I have not come to bring peace, but a sword.

For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother,

and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law, and one's foes will be members of one's own household.

Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me.

And whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.

And whoever does not take up the cross and follow me is not worthy of me.

Those who find their life will lose it.

And those who lose their life for my sake will find it.

This is the gospel of the Lord.

Praise to you, Lord.

You may be seated.

I want to start with a little audience participation.

Nothing big, don't worry.

But just a simple yes or no question.

What we just heard.

Tenth chapter of Matthew's gospel.

Was that a good Father's Day reading or what?

Yes or no?

No, no, it's not.

And why?

I don't know, maybe that whole section about bringing a sword of division,

and I'm quoting Jesus here,

set a man against his father.

Or the doozy of a line,

whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me.

And whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy.

Happy Father's Day, everybody.

Yes, this reading, right?

It talks about division and opposition, denial, even death itself.

If we are to take Jesus at his word, as we should,

then these are the costs of discipleship.

Discipleship, right?

That is what Jesus is up to in this tenth chapter of Matthew's gospel.

It's a continuation of last week's text,

when Jesus commissions the twelve to go and proclaim the kingdom of God,

spread healing and health and wholeness throughout the land.

And this week the story continues,

and we hear what it may cost the disciples to do just this.

And what a cost it seems to be,

a cost that could lead to estrangement from family,

a cost that leads to even death itself.

I wanted to start with that question up at the top,

whether this is a good Father's Day text or not,

because I think the fact that we said no

points to a fundamental part of how we read not only Scripture,

read the difficult parts of Scripture,

but also how we just go about life.

Because I agree with you, you know?

I sat with this text, I taught a Bible study on it on Thursday,

I prepared to share it with you this morning,

and I couldn't help but think, what bad news.

What a bad news text for Father's Day.

I focused right away on the seemingly negative context of Jesus' words.

And in a way I can't help this.

This is a human phenomenon, focusing on the negative.

If there is a situation, or in this case a text with a mix,

that has a mix of positives, a mix of negatives,

we will, by nature, always focus on the negative.

This is just a proven human trait.

Psychologists, social scientists have found in studies

that, in general, we have an easier time remembering negative incidents

than positive ones.

In an article written by a Florida State social psychologist,

she says, incidents such as losing money,

being abandoned by friends, and receiving criticism,

those three things, have a greater impact on an individual

than their opposites.

Winning money, making friends, or receiving praise.

Put this another way, we are more upset about losing 100

than we are about gaining 100.

But don't feel bad.

There is a distinct evolutionary reason for this.

The article writes, those who are more attuned to bad things

would have been more likely to survive, survive threats,

and consequently would have increased the probability

of passing those negative genes along.

Survival requires urgent attention to possible bad outcomes,

but less urgent attention with regard to good ones.

So our brains, our brains have adapted

to prefer this type of negative information.

For early humans, if fire hurts, and saber-toothed tigers are dangerous,

we need to learn that pretty quickly.

Pretty quickly.

What I'm not saying is that we should just ignore what Jesus is saying,

or we just need to focus harder on the positives.

That's not what I'm saying.

I think it's important for Jesus to paint a realistic account

of the true cost of discipleship.

After all, it would be foolish to look at our faith and to look at life

and the world in general through rose-colored glasses.

Just ignore the hard truths that life can hold.

There's an interview I read years ago now in The Atlantic

by author Rachel Held Evans.

The article was entitled,

Is Christianity Dark Enough for Young People?

Here's what that means.

This is an interview about her book, Searching for Sundays,

which was coming out at the time,

which is about trying to find authenticity in the church.

Something that we sometimes lack,

and which young people, especially young people these days, they crave.

Evans says that so much of what Christianity produces,

especially what we do on Sundays,

chooses to look through life with rose-colored glasses.

Everything is often upbeat and super smiley.

We want to ignore the hard discussions

and pretend like sometimes sin doesn't divide us from God

and from each other.

Sure, it's good to be positive.

That's a good trait.

But what about when those rose-colored glasses we wear to church

filter out the realities of our life?

Can our faith be strong enough

to address the things of this world that wound us,

the things that scare us?

And as Jesus talks about those things that can divide us.

And so we don't shy away.

We don't shy away from texts like today's

that address the realities,

not only of what the disciples will encounter in the Gospels,

or what the disciples will encounter as they try to build the early church,

but also the realities of our own lives

that can at times, if we're just being honest,

if we just take off our rose-colored glasses,

our lives that can be full of hard truths,

full of hurt, full of sickness,

opposition, division, denial, even death itself.

And there's also another reason.

If we don't read hard texts like this one,

then we would also miss the good news

that is hiding amidst the weeds,

like a friendly saber-toothed tiger waiting to pounce,

but instead of eating you, this time give you hugs and a nuzzle.

The good news of the Gospel

and the good news of the life of discipleship is still here,

even if it isn't the first place our ears and our eyes and our minds go,

because we're just human.

The good news is indeed sprinkled throughout this text,

and it shows up prominently in three places

in the same identical way.

Chapter 10, verse 26.

Four simple words.

So have no fear.

And then in case we missed it the first time,

it shows up just two verses later in verse 28.

Do not fear.

And in case we were sleeping or our minds wandered somewhere else,

Jesus repeats it for a third time,

three verses later, verse 31.

So do not be afraid.

Yes, these three exhortations not to fear

are surrounded by lots of things to fear.

But that's okay, for two reasons.

And the first is because naming aloud the suffering to be endured

and its causes is often the first step in freeing us

from the grips of fear.

And the second reason is because of what Jesus says

between the first time he says, have no fear,

and the last time he says, be not afraid.

And what he says is this.

He says, are not two sparrows sold for a penny?

Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father.

And even the hairs of your head are all counted.

So do not be afraid.

You are of more value than many sparrows.

Now I do think that those are words for Father's Day.

That we have a God, a Heavenly Father who is so great

and so full of grace and compassion

that not even a single sparrow on earth falls to the ground

apart from God's love.

The disciples who would have been listening to Jesus

would have recognized that the sparrows Jesus is talking about

are the very same ones that they would have found in the marketplace.

A meat source eaten by the poorest people

was the cheapest meat in the market that anyone could buy,

these little sparrows.

And Jesus is saying, that's right.

Even that sparrow does not fall to earth

without it breaking the heart of God.

So if that is the case,

then don't you think that this God will care for you

no matter what might befall you in life,

be it hardship, be it heartache,

be it division?

Isn't it worth following that kind of loving God

even if it means you may lose some things along the way?

Isn't it worth being a disciple of that kind of loving God

even if it means losing the life you thought you wanted?

Because in following Christ,

you will get the life that is worth living.

And if that's not enough, Jesus continues.

Did you not know that God counts

for every single hair on your head?

Every single hair.

Each one of those hundred thousand little strands,

a tiny touch point of God's love.

If that is the case, then don't you think

that this God will care for you

no matter what misfortunes you count in your life?

Isn't it worth following that kind of loving God

even if it means you may lose some things along the way?

Isn't it worth following that kind of loving God

even if it means losing your life

or at least the life that you look at

through rose-colored glasses?

And if your answer to those questions

is yes,

yes, it is worth it,

then this really is good news.

For Father's Day

and for disciples of Jesus,

it's good news for any day.

Thanks be to God. Amen.