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Beyond the Letter Night || Night 10 || ALFC Fresh Start

Patria Sermons

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  1. For this year, we're going to once a month, on the first Wednesday

  2. of every month, we're gonna do our Beyond the Letter nights, where we

  3. say, hey, you bring the questions, we'll bring the conversation. We'll

  4. take a biblical look, a biblical approach to some of the things that you

  5. may be wrestling with or your friends may be wrestling with. One of the

  6. criticisms of the church today not just abundant living, but the capital C churches.

  7. A lot of young people today say the church doesn't address the problems of

  8. the world today and they seem a bit out of touch. And so for

  9. us, not only is our Beyond the Letter podcast a way where we have

  10. conversations around that, but these particular Wednesday nights, we're dedicated to take more

  11. of a biblical approach. So if this is your first time, we just

  12. do these. We'll have one more in December, and we just do these

  13. at the top of the month. And it's where anyone can submit a question.

  14. You can find it on our web page at any time and you can

  15. submit, and so far we have some submitted today and so we're excited to

  16. dive into them, as there were a lot of great questions, and it's

  17. amazing that as we've been doing this now since the top of the year,

  18. the questions have just gotten not that they've gotten better and better, but you

  19. could tell people are taking deeper, deeper thought into the questions that they're asking

  20. and also putting more of their own personal life into it, which is what

  21. we love, because that's what we want to do. We love to answer

  22. questions about God and apologetic questions, but we also love to answer questions about

  23. man, just the systems of the church and our daily lives and how God

  24. relates to our daily life. And we're getting a lot of questions like that.

  25. So I'm gonna dig right in as always. Here we have with us

  26. Pastor Aaron, who leads our Pomona campus is with us. We have you,

  27. we have our founding pastor and Pastor Diego here joining with us tonight,

  28. and then myself, Pastor Adam, and then we have Sonnas who's part of

  29. our women's ministry and now also part of our counseling team as well, so

  30. you've been joining in that as well. So yes, so I'm excited.

  31. Let's jump to the first question of the day. That's someone in our community.

  32. Has asked, So whenever you guys are ready, we will throw it

  33. up on the screen. All right, we start have you right away?

  34. What is tithing under the New Covenant? And what they're referring to new Covenant

  35. as they're talking about our relationship with Jesus, the New Covenant with Christ and

  36. how Jesus redeems us, and so what is our what is tithing under the

  37. New Covenant? Or why is there no tithing in the New Testament? Or

  38. the word tithing is rather what they may be meaning. So let's jump into

  39. a pastor Diego. I'll let you. You obviously have been pastoring in the

  40. game longer than all of us. So you from the day you started abundant

  41. living, we're talking about tithing. What what's your thoughts on their question?

  42. Uh, Well, we're gonna sit next month or this this this Sunday,

  43. this Sunday, the month of November, do a series on generosity, which

  44. is gonna break down as much of the confusion, the ignorance, the nirativity

  45. and try to bring clarity to all the subjects on financial giving. So we're

  46. going to go much in depth about it that we would not be able to

  47. cover in a few minutes answering this question. But the reality is is that

  48. tithing is found in the New Testament. It's absolutely found in the New Testament.

  49. So you know, having a knowledge of the Bible helps us to answer

  50. mostly all our questions if we just study to show ourself to prove so Matthew

  51. twenty three and verse twenty three and twenty four. Jesus is clear here.

  52. And last time I read Matthew was in the New Testament. Could somebody tell

  53. me it's not in the New Testament Matthews in the two Okay, I just

  54. want to make sure woe to you scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites, for you

  55. tithe mint and anis and comming and have neglected the weightier matters of the law,

  56. justice and faith. So they absolutely tie ten percent. But they didn't

  57. care about their character. They didn't care about justice, mercy and faith.

  58. These here's a key word in Jesus's mouth, these you ought to have done.

  59. He wouldn't have said, you know what, only justice and mercy you

  60. ought to have done. Forget about tithing because it's abolished. He didn't say

  61. that. He said you ought to have done both of them. So that's

  62. one scripture. Then you get into Hebrew seventh and I can't read all of

  63. Hebrew seven. I really want to encourage you to do this, but it

  64. talks about a character in the Old Testament named Melchizedek. Now, last time

  65. I read hebrews is in the New Testament. So why would the Bible be

  66. talking about an Old Testament story about tithing and bring confusion to the New Testament

  67. church if the word tithing or the principle of tithing was not aparable for the

  68. New Testament church. Is he's bringing an Old Testament story of how Abraham tied

  69. a tenth part of what he the spoils of the Valley of the Kings,

  70. in which he came back from drawing to the New Testament saints that tithing and

  71. you could read it all. We don't have time that it's still a principle

  72. that's given today. Now we could talk about grace giving, and we could

  73. talk about generosity and all those kinds of things, but we're not because we're

  74. just gonna stick with the word tithing today. And again, the Old Testament

  75. it is clearly there. But the New Testament it is clearly there too.

  76. Now you would say, well, why doesn't it talk about it more?

  77. Well, there's so many other Old Testament scriptures that the New Testament doesn't talk

  78. about. A lot the Old Testament talks about thou shall not murder. Tell

  79. me in the New Testament where it says thou shall not murder, how many

  80. of you believe that the Old Testament has gone and now in the New Testament

  81. we can murder who whatever we want. None of you raise your hands?

  82. Why why do you still believe not to murder? Because the scriptures still bring

  83. clarity on an act of love and what you do to your brother. Even

  84. though the word may not be there, the principle still applies. And I

  85. could go into Old Testament interpretation that not everything in the Old Testament is abolished,

  86. it's fulfilled in the New Testament, and in the New Testament will bring

  87. clarity to the Old Testament. Like circumcision. The New Testament tells you it's

  88. abolished. We don't circumcise anymore. Ten commandments. He comes back and says,

  89. there's two now commandments. We love the Lord with all our So there's

  90. clarity now from the Old to the New. Are you with me? So

  91. the Bible doesn't bring counterdiction. It brings clarity. So in reality, what

  92. did the old principle of tithing do? It met the needs of the church.

  93. So I always tell people, if you don't believe in tithing, then

  94. tell me how the church stays open, because I've been doing this forty years

  95. and no matter what you say, people are generous, they are not generous,

  96. and the church will never stay open through so called grace giving or simply

  97. the goodness of our hearts. We wouldn't do that. So I don't want

  98. to bring all that out, but it's true. There's true. The tithe

  99. comes to the storehouse where distribution can be made, and so the needs within

  100. that house can be done. If we don't choose to say the tithe does

  101. not exist anymore, then here's what I have to do. Then I have

  102. to be a preacher up here as a pastor and tell you today, then

  103. here's what we got. Guys. We got a two hundred and eighty thousand

  104. dollars mortgage this month and we have it for the next thirty thirty years.

  105. So we're gonna count the tithing. So go back and count the tithing.

  106. Right now we are two hundred and fifty. We are thirty thousand dollars short.

  107. So I need thirty thousand dollars from people today. Who's gonna give five,

  108. who's gonna give one, who's gonna give How would you love to come

  109. to church and me tell you every single week how much short we are,

  110. and you want to give it and still remain happy in the church. Don't

  111. raise your hand. Not one of you would do that. So you have

  112. to understand a little bit of a broader tense why the tithe is so important.

  113. And we'll talk about the blessing of it, the reward of it.

  114. It's all about heart. Tithing is not about money. It's about heart.

  115. It's about your heart. And I'm sorry to say, the thing that controls

  116. most people's hearts is their money. And so people are just getting saved.

  117. It's difficult to do that. It's a learned process. Uh, it's it's

  118. a devotion to God. And but you'll get there. And I think I

  119. said more than that. I mean, you know and most most most you

  120. can find almost every theologian from the days of Jesus till the days now,

  121. and if you study the New Testament, which is particularly Paul's letters when he

  122. talks about because money has talked about a lot in the Pauline letters. He

  123. talks about he talks about, Hey, I'm gonna be coming to you guys

  124. soon and Second Corinthians, and he says, have the finances ready so I

  125. could take them back to Jerusalem so the gospel can continue to spread. I

  126. mean, you will find countless times where Paul is talking to the church and

  127. he's saying, Hey, I'm gonna stop by and I'm gonna be gathering the

  128. finances that go towards the continued spread of the gospel. And then he also

  129. says. There's even a scripture in the New Testament where Paul says, hey,

  130. instead of doing once a quarter fundraising, why don't you guys collect your

  131. giving every week so that when I arrive, no one has to scrounge and

  132. financially be able to cover the church's cost. We still do that today,

  133. two thousand years later. So what I always encourage people to say is you

  134. may want to get in the finite details of okay, is tithing part of

  135. the Old Covenant well systematically in order for the Old Covenant Church, which was

  136. the Jewish Church to run, which they facilitated as the hospital, the town

  137. hall, the place where you get water. It was the synagogue's job that

  138. facilitated the town hall. That Israel is a theocracy, their government is the

  139. church. So in order for that to function, that was part of their

  140. tax process. But in Israel, tithing wasn't just part of their taxes.

  141. They had to pay land tax, they had to pay a crop tax,

  142. they had to pay festival taxes, they had to pay for doves and sacrifices.

  143. And so it's believed that an average Jewish person actually paid twenty five percent

  144. of their income to the church. Well, it was thirty percent including Rome.

  145. So if you now include now Jesus's day, that was thirty to fifty

  146. percent because the tax collectors were, let's take a little butter on top for

  147. themselves, you know, So at any given time during Jesus time, an

  148. average Jewish person actually would have been paying taxes and tithe of fifty percent of

  149. their income. In told and so in the now in the early Church,

  150. as the Church started spreading basically what he said is, they said hey,

  151. instead of mandating, because in the Old Testament times everyone held each other accountable.

  152. Even still to this day in Jewish synagogues. If a person makes a

  153. tithe commitment and they don't fulfill it at the end of the year, they're

  154. not allowed to come to church anymore. That still happens in Gediatism today,

  155. to the synagogue unless they tie, yeah, they can't fellowship. Yeah.

  156. And then if you're struggling financially, you got to go meet with the rabbi.

  157. You got to prove it in order to still be brought. So that's

  158. why then early Church started saying, hey, give what the Lord puts on

  159. your heart. But what Paul is really emphasizing, he said, more than

  160. likely every theologian believes this. In the early Church, every church person in

  161. the early Church was giving more than ten percent, So to them, that

  162. would have been their bare that would have been a bare minimum. If you

  163. went to the early Church and you said, hey, back where I'm at

  164. in twenty twenty three, you know there are some people who go to church

  165. that give zero to one percent to their church or zero to three percent church,

  166. they would honestly, they wouldn't believe it. They said, Man,

  167. there's no way that's happening. How is the gospel spreading that way? It's

  168. like, well, you know, you know, some churches don't. Some

  169. churches aren't able to take care of their things. Some churches go. They

  170. wouldn't, they couldn't believe that. And so what I always tell people when

  171. they want to kind of debate Old Covenant new covenant giving is either you can

  172. lean towards the old Covenant, which is ten percent, or you can lean

  173. towards the New Covenant, which is like, well, if you read the

  174. Book of Access says and everyone sold all of their things and gave it all

  175. to the church so it may grow. So I always tell people do you

  176. want to go with one hundred percent or ten percent? Which one you want?

  177. Because in access says they sold it all so the church could spread.

  178. So that kind of gives a little clarity of where you're at in terms of

  179. giving, and you spend a little We spend a little time on it because

  180. in the series we're gonna go a little bit into tithing, but but not

  181. a whole lot. It's all what we're doing in the novemaver series is talking

  182. about the way God views money as a whole in our own personal lives and

  183. also how that ascribes into our Christian walk as well. And the Bible just

  184. makes it clear. Whether you read Matthew Tewond Corinthians, God says if you

  185. sow sparingly, you will reap sparingly. If you give generously, you will

  186. get generously. That is a principle that God applies. So the more you

  187. give in the kingdom, the more you reap in the kingdom. That does

  188. it always equal financial. God will do other things as well on top of

  189. financial, and so God keeps his promises according to the Word of God when

  190. it comes to both our tithing and our generosity. So great question asking that,

  191. And obviously you can always email us if you want to dig in deeper.

  192. So that's why we call it now tithes, offering and generosity. We've

  193. kind of added that generosity bit as well to help people who are new to

  194. church understand because those creatuterminologies tithing ten offer no percent, there's no percentage that

  195. is obligated there, but it's above the ten percent. And then almsgiving,

  196. which was special needs, poor widows, things of that nature. Those are

  197. the three offerings that the Bible expected the Church to be in a position to

  198. be able to do. Yeah, that's great. Okay, let's jump to

  199. question number dose dose question. I'm always feeling guilty. I'm always feeling guilt

  200. and anxiety when I hear an airplane fly by, because I think it's the

  201. rapture happening here at an earthquake or something like that. Just grab your children

  202. and say it's time. And most of my anxiety is anxiety is coming from

  203. the rapture. I know it's bad to feel anxious about the rapture. How

  204. can I become closer with God where I feel comfort in the anxiety, or

  205. how can I turn my life around so I can find joy in it?

  206. That's a great question. And for those that are new to church, when

  207. they say rapture, they're talking about the day that Jesus returns and he takes

  208. us up to heaven. Jesus says, okay, it's game time. It

  209. is time. I'm gonna bring the believers up to heaven and I'm coming back

  210. for them. So that's the rapture they're talking about, which was made most

  211. famous in kind of the nineties and two thousands with Kirk Cameron's Left Behind and

  212. that they portrayed it through film the most and so Pastor Diego, you want

  213. to take that first, well, first of all Philippians forces be anxious for

  214. nothing everything by prayer and supplications. Let your request be made known unto God,

  215. and the peace of God that passes all understanding, will be yours.

  216. My first question is, and I appreciate where they're coming from, is I

  217. would ask them, if they are in front of me, tell me where

  218. else in your life are you anxious? Because it's hard for me to believe

  219. that just the rapture makes you anxious. It's very probable there are some other

  220. things, and it's a broader picture. So let's deal with more of the

  221. broader solution to this. And it has to do with the Bible's clear that

  222. we are not to be anxious. So when you are doing that, you're

  223. violating something that God doesn't want you to have. So what is your Let's

  224. go to what the Word says. What is your prayer life like? So

  225. the way to combat anxiety is to lift your prayer life. Peace. I

  226. leave on you my piece. I give you. What are you letting the

  227. devil? Or who? Or what? Still your peace that Jesus has given

  228. to you. So now it puts it in a little bit. Say wait

  229. a minute, you just gave me peace I'm not gonna let it be stolen

  230. through anxiety. I'm gonna pray and I'm gonna trust God. So that's what

  231. I would say. But there's probably in some other areas of life they're still

  232. anxious. This is just one thing that they're anxious about. And what I

  233. would add to that is Pesha Diego said, if this person was in front

  234. of me. So I think that's the vision of beyond the letter Nights is

  235. a great start line for us as a community to start asking questions. But

  236. the prayer is that we continue to progress by joining a neighborhood group or maybe

  237. going to counseling or forward for anxiety, because that's when discipleship happens, when

  238. we're asking the questions in front of someone else that can help us, so

  239. that way we can get the context of it. Isaiah twenty six three comes

  240. to mind. You will keep him in perfect peace whose mind has stayed on

  241. you because he trust in you. So there are things that trigger us,

  242. there are things that make us nervous, make us scared. It's okay to

  243. be honest about that, it's not okay to stay in that though. I

  244. think today in today's culture is like it's my anxiety. It's just my anxiety,

  245. my anxiety, my anxiety. So then when pastor just started saying,

  246. like, hey, we're violating something, I've never even thought of it that

  247. way. But it's clear in Philippians for it, where it says be anxious

  248. for nothing. It's okay to feel anxious, it's just not okay to stay

  249. anxious. So one key element of getting out of that anxiety is confessing that

  250. out loud in front of someone, Hey, this happened, this is how

  251. it made me feel. Recommendation for that is quoting scripture out loud because faith

  252. comes by hearing hearing the word of God. Because in that question, when

  253. they're talking about the rapture, they just started saying how do I turn my

  254. life around? So there's other things that are going on, Like if I

  255. were to say, okay, I feel guilt when I'm thinking about the rapture,

  256. it's like, well, I'm thinking about my unsaye family members, or

  257. am I being a witness for Christ because rapture excites me. So it's different

  258. context for different individuals, but it sounds like that person is talk thinking through

  259. their life. But what I would do if that is your scenario. Continue

  260. to go to church, continue to get coffee and so forth after church,

  261. and have connections with people, follow us on social media, join a neighborhood

  262. group, so that way you start coming to the events. If you're a

  263. woman and you submitted that question, come to the Woman's night Shop in the

  264. courtyard, and then you'll find that you're building relationships with people that can help

  265. with every day struggles in questions. Yeah, that's great, that's that's very

  266. good. I'm glad you said, because I'm just an old school guy and

  267. I believe in the power of the word, and any negative thing that you're

  268. struggling with, you got to get every scripture that you can on that and

  269. confess that and pray that until that thing's broken, because that's what Jesus did

  270. when the enemy came after him. He said, it is written, it

  271. is written, It is written, and that's what you need to do.

  272. And that thing, I've never seen somebody not get victory through the diligence of

  273. that, which is really, you know, really really important. And last

  274. of all is the rapture or going to heaven is our reward. I want

  275. to go home. I want to go home. So you shouldn't fear going

  276. home, So get a revelation of where you're going, who's going to be

  277. there, what's going to happen, and that's what we live for. I

  278. want to go home, so I just say, Pastor, and being raised

  279. in church, I did have fear of the rapture because I know I wasn't

  280. one hundred with God, Okay, So so with that that ship that could

  281. be you're especially when that Yeah, that's where my fear came from. But

  282. here was the problem, Like, I grew up in a youth group.

  283. In youth group that and that was it was big in the two thousands.

  284. So it wasn't just our youth group because I grew up in this youth group,

  285. but it was this idea that it was basically always, if you sinned,

  286. you're not a Christian. That was the message I heard all the time

  287. in youth group. And so obviously I sinned all the time, so I

  288. was like, I don't think I'm a Christian. So when the preachers would

  289. perpetually preach that Jesus is coming like a thief in the night, I'd be

  290. like, well, what if he comes if I'm in the middle of a

  291. sin I'm not a Christian then, like, but I really thought these things

  292. too. He was like, that's what I was saying, absolutely, And

  293. I was, you know, I was doing stuff that wasn't in high school.

  294. I wasn't doing stuff that resembled a Christian. He's a pastor kid,

  295. so I can imagine this is where this person is coming from. Right,

  296. So I'd be like, oh my gosh, like if I'm doing this,

  297. actor, I'm doing that and I'm not. Or if if you know,

  298. every night i'd make sure God I repent to my sins in case you come

  299. tonight. Like that's what I thought salvation was. I thought it was just

  300. an altar call. I thought it was just in youth group that said,

  301. hey, if you if you went too far with your girlfriend, or if

  302. you cuss that day or you whatever, if God comes out, you're noll

  303. and void, like he ain't taking you with him, which is a very

  304. scary thing. So if that person is looking at salvation and the rapture in

  305. that light, and I always have people who come to me after service they

  306. say, pastor had him. How do I know that I'm saved? I

  307. say, well, step number one. Nobody who doesn't want to be saved

  308. doesn't ask that question. So the fact that you're asking that question means you

  309. are deeply thinking about being in unity with Christ, you know, and with

  310. God. Now, are you struggling with sin? Maybe so, but that

  311. does not immediately negate you from salvation and from when Jesus returns. Romans chapter

  312. six, Romans chapter seven. Apostle Paul says, if you are in sin,

  313. Christ has died for your sin, And he says, then that does

  314. does that give us an excuse to sin all we want? He says no,

  315. by no means, he says, but the fact is still the fact

  316. that as you confess Christ and make him your lord and savior, that day

  317. that Jesus returns, you are returning with him. You are return You could

  318. you could, you could, Paul would say, you could go as to

  319. say, you could be in the middle of cussing someone out in your flesh.

  320. But if you are redeemed by Jesus, you are in the middle of

  321. that. He's taking you with them. He's not. He's not gonna say,

  322. okay, Adam, let's wait until you finish that and repent before or

  323. he's gonna say, Adam was good yesterday but today he messed up a little

  324. bit, and so I'm leaving him out for all eternity. That's not how

  325. the Lord works. And so more than anything, if you have anxiety about

  326. you have to take hope and faith to know that your name is written on

  327. the Lamb's book of life. And if you have trusted Jesus in salvation,

  328. uh, nothing can separate you from that love. And so so when he

  329. returns, he will return for you. Don't fear that he won't. You

  330. know, I would just say, Pastor, ask him, don't be in

  331. the situation and when you're cussing someone out, Yeah, Jesus come, that's

  332. a wild story. I mean, but that's perfect. That's perfect world,

  333. you know, Pastor Aaron. But but I've been around you when you've said

  334. so, I would hope if he returned that he would take you with him.

  335. I used to hear the Bible school of the analogy, and that it

  336. very like the war going on now. Is the fact that an American citizen

  337. is an American citizen. A citizen of Heaven is a citizen of Heaven.

  338. Okay, so now when war breaks out, they don't interview them and say,

  339. are you a good citizen or a bad citizen of America, because if

  340. you're bad, we've got to leave you in the war area. But if

  341. you're a good citizen, we'll take you home and rescue from the war.

  342. They don't do that. They just want to see your passport. Okay,

  343. get bring in it, bring in a fighter, and we're taking are We're

  344. taking them home to escape the war. And that's what the rapture is.

  345. Amen, I'm rolling with that story. Aaron's like, oh, thank God,

  346. I'm being it clear. All right, let's go, let's go.

  347. Let's go to the next question. Uh, how can I how can how

  348. can what can I do to start small with turning to God? I know

  349. that being saved doesn't happen overnight, and honestly, rushing the process is hard,

  350. So how can I start small but be on the right path? These

  351. are great questions, the great perspective of questions where people are really at Uh,

  352. Sons, I'll give it to you to address it first. Okay.

  353. First of all, I think that that's such a great thought process of wanting

  354. to come into faith and wanting to build a relationship with Jesus and not and

  355. understand that it is a process and that it does take time, and that

  356. you know, so often we we get so excited about something that we want

  357. to dive one hundred percent in and we start doing things that are not necessarily

  358. practical in our life, and what ends up happening is we end up falling

  359. off. I can only the only example I could give to you that I've

  360. done a million times is going on a diet, and you know that first

  361. week is like, this is the best I've ever eaten in my whole life.

  362. But it's just one of those things where it's so it's it's it's too

  363. much and doesn't necessarily it's not sustainable, And so what ends up happening is

  364. if it's not sustainable, we have a hard time continuing on the path that

  365. we were on. So starting small and understanding. I heard I was listening

  366. to a podcast recently and U Pastor Chris Hodges was on it, and he

  367. was was talking about the principle of tithing. But it's really relevant here because

  368. he was talking about principles, and he was talking about what principles are.

  369. They're these habits that you develop and they become important to you. And if

  370. you develop these principles, then over time, the principles will always win over

  371. the pressures because the pressures will come, but you'll end up choosing the principles

  372. over the pressures when time comes. So when we're developing our relationship with the

  373. Lord and we're taking these steps where it is sustainable in our life and we're

  374. growing organically with the Lord, you know, there's always there's non negotiables in

  375. the sense where if you have an encounter with God and you are not living

  376. right, then then then then immediately stopping a sinful lifestyle is definitely something that

  377. we just don't take baby steps in. You want to go all in.

  378. But when it comes to the principles and the habits of a daily relationship with

  379. God, it's important to build those small. So some of the examples that

  380. I would recommend is if you've never read a Bible, first thing is buy

  381. a Bible, and the second thing is start I would start with the Gospels.

  382. If you don't know who Jesus is, learn who Jesus is first,

  383. and then you can start with a devotional. It's a few minutes a day

  384. where it leads you to a scripture, and then it's just building the habits

  385. of spending time with God every single day, and then you can start building

  386. upon that. But if we go and we say, Okay, i want

  387. to have a relationship with God and I'm going to go all in, which

  388. is wonderful and for some people that totally you could be a you could radically

  389. change your life. But you have to look at your life and say,

  390. is that going to be sustainable? Am I the type of person that goes

  391. all in and then falls off a month later? I don't want to do

  392. it this way, so I have to do it differently. Take a deep

  393. breath. God's not going anywhere. He will always be here on the days

  394. that you're a good Christian and on the days that you're a bad Christian.

  395. All those things that we talked about, and take it day by day every

  396. day. Start building small habits. When you realize that you've got those habits

  397. down, like having a devotional, like spending fifteen minutes reading your Bible in

  398. the morning, like having a time at the end of the night where you

  399. just pray, being in the car praying, being in the shower praying.

  400. All these little things that you can add throughout the day will begin to strengthen.

  401. You just like your strength training. In order to get your body right,

  402. you strengthen. You don't go from lifting no weights to you know,

  403. lifting four hundred and fifty pounds. You don't do that. You have to

  404. start building the muscles slowly, and so then you just build those habits one

  405. by one. And you don't have to be a perfectionist with God. You

  406. can be broken with God. You can have bad days with God. You

  407. could be reading your Bible and then all of a sudden realize that you have

  408. no idea what you read because you dozed off and you've drifted off and be

  409. like, sorry, Lord, let me start over. It's okay. He's

  410. patient, he's kind, and he will walk you through this process at the

  411. pace that's going to work for you. It's great. Yeah you. And

  412. I add a little bit too that I love this question because it sounds like

  413. this person has desired, but they're trying to grow on their disciplines, and

  414. that's all about discipleships. So that was me when I came to this church

  415. in twenty ten. I had a desire to just change my life. I

  416. just had terrible disciplines, and I was around people that had values that I

  417. had the same values, but I wanted to change. So I remember when

  418. Pastor Diego in his alter call, he said, come to church for a

  419. year straight and see what God to do in your life. And I just

  420. took that serious. I'm going to go to church everyone Wednesday and Sunday.

  421. And at that time, I wasn't reading my Bible, I wasn't tithing.

  422. Things weren't really but I made one discipline. I'm gonna go to Wednesday night

  423. service, then I'm gonna go to Sunday. And as I kept coming,

  424. Pashor Diego said, hey, you know what a Christian serves? Okay,

  425. where should I serve? So I just started serving. And what I recognized

  426. now about serving, it was never about me high fiving the kids and tell

  427. them, hey, don't text during service. It was about me hanging out

  428. with other married couples there were Christians and also had problems. So I was

  429. starting to hang around people that had the values that I wanted. So it

  430. wasn't like I needed to hang around the pastor and get a word. I

  431. needed to be a part of a community that had the values that was going

  432. in God's way. So that's what this church is about. So that's why

  433. our announcements are very important. Our Instagram's very important for those that were saying,

  434. hey, I love ALFC, but I want to go deeper. That's

  435. why we have the events, That's why we have the classes that we have

  436. because it helps us go on in our discipleship journey. So great question,

  437. and that's why ALFC has these classes to complement discipleship. That's great. Yeah,

  438. nice, thank you guys. All right, let's hit question number four.

  439. Our tattoos a sin or not a sin? Because I was told,

  440. always told by my parents you know me too, that tattoos were a sin.

  441. And still to this day, with all the people that I've asked that

  442. are in faith and have tattoos, I still don't have a clear answer.

  443. Well, what a church to choose ask that question? You know, I

  444. believe they are a sin. No, I'm just kidding up. I have

  445. been living. I've just prayed every time I've gotten tattoos and say, Lord,

  446. don't come back right now, not right now, Wait until this tattoo's

  447. done and I repent, and then you could come back guy. Uh but

  448. uh, you know the short answer is number one, No, tattoos in

  449. general are not a sin. But can tattooing. Can getting a tattoo be

  450. a sin? Absolutely, uh any almost anything that you do if it if

  451. it is not done in respect to your body, in respect to glorifying the

  452. Lord, not that it has to say God's name on it, but but

  453. but but not. The Bible says all things can be, can be lawful,

  454. but are all things beneficial? No? Sure, so there is there

  455. is a hard line that getting a tattoo can pose a threat and can move

  456. into a sinful territory. And in particular, maybe someone that is a little

  457. more traditional who takes the levitical approach of Leviticus to say, hey a little

  458. bit. Leviticus nineteen says that you cannot tattoo or you mark your body,

  459. but when you continue to read, it says in honor of the dead,

  460. which was a very common pagan practice by the Canaanites and by the Egyptians,

  461. where they would tattoo their bodies in a religious way that was pagan. So

  462. that would be similar to us. If I get a tattoo of a zodiac

  463. symbol, if I get a tattoo of Buddha, if I get a tattoo

  464. of a Santa Maria that has some type of miracle behind it that I think,

  465. yes, you you are. You are stepping in to a territory of

  466. sin because you are glorifying something that does not give glory to God. That

  467. that now becomes a reproach of conscience. But Leviticus's versus alone is not enough

  468. for you to ban anyone to be able to get a tattoo, because that's

  469. really the only verse and one in Deuteronomy, which which is the same as

  470. Leviticus. They're both the laws, and those were religious laws, and it

  471. specifically was only talking about those specific tattoos because it represented pagan worship and that

  472. that God does that that's that's a reflect of us breaking one of the ten

  473. commandments, which do not make any idled images or any gods before God.

  474. Yahweh, don't don't pursue any other God. So a tattoo can go into

  475. the place of putting another god before God. I get a little Buddha tattoo

  476. or something like that, Yeah, I'm putting another God before God. But

  477. in the same regard. Uh, you know, here's some Levitical laws that

  478. maybe you and I break all the time. Number one, you're not allowed

  479. to eat meat with blood in any regard. So so if you have any

  480. you know, in and out rare or anything like that, you know,

  481. oh man, you're you're break, You're breaking the law. It also says

  482. that you can't shman, you can't shave your beard at all. You can't

  483. touch it with clippers. So I'm looking at a lot of I don't see

  484. anyone here with more than a one foot beard, you know, in this

  485. room. It also says you can't round out the side of your sideburdens.

  486. So you know, I see a lot of people here who have rounded sideburns.

  487. Here's some other ones. It also so says that you can't make wear

  488. clothing with two types of fabrics. So in your denim, you like a

  489. little elastain in there for a little stretch to get you through the day and

  490. through a meal. Guess what you're in sin, You're in trouble. You

  491. better hope Jesus don't come back when you're putting them jeans on wool only pants

  492. from here on out. You know, says you can't mix fabrics. I

  493. mean, we do that all the time. And so there's a lot of

  494. things that Leviticus banded, but most of that stuff banded because what God was

  495. trying to do was he was trying to restructure Israel's mentality that was coming out

  496. of slavery, that was coming out of pagan worship, and so God was

  497. separating those things. So there may be a season where you when you get

  498. saved, that you come out of something that God may be separating that from

  499. you. So that could be true. Right. You talk about people who

  500. celebrate Halloween in terms of just dressing up and going to Kenny and others who

  501. don't. Some people say, hey, I can separate the two because I

  502. came from from witchcraft and sorcery and so to me, Halloween used to be

  503. a day where we would do seances and sacrifices. Well, the raality is

  504. for you, you got Yeah, you got to separate yourself from Halloween.

  505. That don't put you in a good framework. You know that doesn't. There's

  506. other people that used to have a crazy life of drinking and partying and smoking

  507. and and so yeah, even one sip of alcohol for you is just too

  508. much. You got to separate yourself from that. So if you come from

  509. a culture where this tattoo culture was exhibiting this life of sin and worldly worship.

  510. Like for you, that may be a sin and you have to separate

  511. yourself from that. But for another who wants to you know, who wants

  512. to not because the dead bodies ones was a form of worship and a form

  513. of incarnation of their past relative. But you know, if you're getting a

  514. flower in honor of your mother like that, that's not worship. That's not

  515. what that is. That's honor, that's remembrance. Totally different. It's a

  516. totally different aspect of according to tattooing and the Bible. So what we have

  517. to do is we have to separate. And what's interesting in all my years

  518. of having tattoos and now I've had visible tattoos on stage for probably eight years.

  519. In eight years, I have only ever had two people write a complaint

  520. about the tattoos. Both of those people didn't even come to Abundant Living.

  521. They just saw it online and they wrote a letter being angry. So in

  522. eight years, I've never had anyone actually approach and say how upset they are.

  523. Actually. Six years ago or seven years ago, I died my tips

  524. blonde like Zach Slater, and I had like forty emailed complaints about dyeing my

  525. hair and looking like the world. I had more complaints about having blonde tips

  526. than I did in eight years of having tattoos. That's just kind of silly

  527. how sometimes we are in the church, right, we just obsess over an

  528. idea without understanding what the Bible really says about this thing. And I know

  529. Pastor Aaron's an expert on it because he got his first tattoo in December in

  530. Israel a year ago. Yeah, I'm for thug purpose. You made it

  531. part of hip hop. You made it over forty years without tattooing getting a

  532. tattoo. Yeah, I asked somebody in Alfc pume on, I'm thinking about

  533. getting a tattoo. What do you think, Pastor, you're too old to

  534. get a tattoo? Yeah, I got. I got my first tattoo in

  535. Israel. It was a special trip with my wife and I. She got

  536. a tattoo. I got a tattoo. I took it like a champ.

  537. Pastor Adam got his tattoo. He was like, yeah, yeah, right,

  538. right, No, no, that that's not hurt this I say.

  539. I say, I only get Israel tattoos because they are like four minutes.

  540. Yeah, yeah, And I think what people do though, is there there

  541. Sometimes we mean well, but you become a religious Zaliat without realizing it.

  542. You've become a pharisee on every law and jot that they judge Jesus by.

  543. And people do it in their rifle or ignorant zeal to be legalistic and feel

  544. like they got to cleanse the body of Christ while they're wearing their Nikes and

  545. Mickey Mouse shirt, thinking that they are holy, not knowing what Nike puts

  546. money into, what Mickey Mouse puts into. And so if you're gonna do

  547. that, then do it across the board. Just dress whatever. I don't

  548. know. I want to say dress naked, but that would be offensive.

  549. But you know that's why the key of what you said to me is this

  550. in Romans fifteen, it's your conscience. It's my personal conscience that's connected to

  551. the Holy Spirit, and the Holy Spirit is my counselor he's my teacher,

  552. and he's my agent to present me to Jesus Christ. And so he'll tell

  553. you. Listen to him, and he'll tell you, you know what,

  554. Like you said, you don't need to be drinking that because that represents your

  555. former lifestyle. Or you know, don't get tattoos because you do, don't

  556. hang around these kinds of people or you know what, You've been redeemed now,

  557. so you like for me, many many years, I didn't listen to

  558. any oldies because oldies represented the old lifestyle I live. But once I began

  559. to root and grow and I didn't have these tormenting thoughts of remember, I

  560. started listening to oldies again. It's good. So it's about your personal conscience

  561. and you need to be very sensitive to that connection to the Holy Spirit and

  562. see what he's telling you. You really quick to do that because you're right

  563. to be okay, but you could be sinning too because of the motive.

  564. Why do you want this thing? What's the motive? Yeah, yeah,

  565. And it doesn't always have to be like because I want to make Jesus famous.

  566. That's what people would tell me. Because I'd say, oh, yeah,

  567. all my personal tattoos are all Christian, they all deal with my faith.

  568. They're like, oh, you get them because you want to make Jesus

  569. famous. I go, no, I get them because I like him.

  570. That's why I get them. Because I'm not going to make an excuse for

  571. getting something to say, well, this is why good reason people People do

  572. that all the time. Like, you know, you hear someone which could

  573. be a sin, I'm gonna I'm gonna get that car I can't afford,

  574. because then it'll inspire people to follow your dreams and you'll succeed. And look

  575. at my well, that's a sin because you're frying, you're you're you're living

  576. a fake lifestyle. You have something you can't afford, and you're trying to

  577. portray and get business and lie to get business. Where that's not you that

  578. that's sin. It's like so for for for one person, or owning a

  579. Mercedes could not be sin. For another person, owning a Mercedes could be

  580. a sin because because they're in they have broken their conscience. According to Rose

  581. fifteen, that they're not living in honesty with their conscience and in their motive.

  582. And so therefore now I have in the same way, is it a

  583. sin for me to data guy who has a Lamborghini? No, it's not.

  584. But if you're dating the guy because he has a Lamborghini, maybe how

  585. about you know, how about yeah, sin a data guy maybe for you

  586. you know. And then lastly, Revelation says Jesus has a tattoo. It

  587. says Jesus has a tattoo on his thigh and his forehead, and it says

  588. king of Kings and Lord of lords, and it says it's a permanent tattoo,

  589. and so and so. For the non tattoo people, I want to

  590. be real uncomfortable when you see Jesus with his ink on his thigh. You

  591. could go read it. Read it revelation. It says he has it permanently

  592. written on his thigh and his forehead, King of Kings and Lord of lords,

  593. so that you and I don't ever forget that when we're talking to him.

  594. So it's in the scriptures. He has something. Now as I say,

  595. okay, since Jesus has tattoos, I'm gonna go get it. No,

  596. that's not an excuse, but it just says you wrong. You know,

  597. I'm like tattoos. I'm never gonna get a tattoo. Yeah. You

  598. know my mom wants to get a tattoo. He does too. Yeah,

  599. I don't think about you guys wanted to get tattooed. The d wants you

  600. to get I say, I said, your God wants you to get tattooed.

  601. When you guys have reached the legal age that if you haven't done it

  602. yet, you've gone past a tattoo. Cast till Jesus comes, it won't

  603. be no taxing. Yeah, I'm saying I want to get a butterfly.

  604. He said, it's too late. Thirty years too late. Oh right.

  605. She was a dolphin, dolphin doph. Yeah, who knows, but there

  606. we are, he said it. He's they're nuanced. You know. The

  607. funny thing is is he he did. He said when I was eighteen,

  608. he said you could have one tattoo because I wanted one ever since I was

  609. like six years old. So pastor diego. When I turned eighteen, he

  610. said, you could have one after you graduate. Yeah, because I was

  611. almost gonna not graduate high school. So they say, if you graduate high

  612. school and you can actually do it, because he was adamant, like till

  613. the day I die, you will not have a tattoo. So it's okay.

  614. So he said, if you actually walk on that graduation because I wasn't,

  615. he said, then I'll let you get one tattoo. Said, great,

  616. I accomplish it. I walked. I got one tattoo. Then he

  617. said, as long as you live under my roof, you can only have

  618. that one tattoo. I said, Great, I turned twenty one, I

  619. went and moved with my brother Pastor Nathan Bada being bomp. You look at

  620. my house. As for me and my house, we will. So that's

  621. why I say to the young person that says, but my parents say,

  622. I can't say. Hey, if you listen under their roof, if you

  623. want God to bless you, obey your parents. If you're eating their food

  624. and driving their car and using your phone with there, but listen to your

  625. parents. Do what your parents said. Don't say, oh what Pastor Adam

  626. said. It's okay, but I'm still benefiting from my mom and dad.

  627. No, no, no, no, I mean I respect it. That's

  628. your rule, your house, your rules. I'm gonna obey it. But

  629. the moment i'm out, your boy's gonna look like he's done some time out

  630. in these streets. That's it. That's it. You know what's funny,

  631. because then we'll move on. But it's a funny conversation. Over the years,

  632. we've had people in our church that that invite their friends that kind of

  633. hang out on the streets or either done some prison time, and they'll come

  634. up to me and they'll say, hey, Pastor Adam, if you're here

  635. next weekend, could you not wear a jacket because I want to introduce my

  636. friend who's done prison time to you, because I think they'll be more accepting

  637. of the church if they meet you first. I'm like, okay, well,

  638. I'm the welcome committee for anyone that's done time before, and they just

  639. want me to show my tattoos and make the person feel better. So hey,

  640. if it does make them feel more welcome, then I'll show them off

  641. all day long. Okay. I even I even say what's up, homie,

  642. you know, like if that fits in a little better too, even

  643. though I grew up in Rancho Cucamonga. So let's go to the next one.

  644. All right, Hello, Pastor, I am I'm a single mom,

  645. recently separated from a manipulative, five year, mentally abusive relationship. I'm sorry

  646. you've been experiencing that. I have a four year old autistic son and I'm

  647. finally attending Rancho campus again. However, I've come alone and want to be

  648. more involved in community. What do you recommend I join? And how do

  649. I stray away from my son's dad Whenever he tries to bring me down.

  650. That's great question. Thank you so much for asking that and even getting back

  651. into church. It's so important and it's such a great question to ask.

  652. And so so now I'll let you take your first there. Well, you

  653. know, this is a wonderful place for you to rebuild your life and so

  654. grateful that the church has an amazing children's ministry for your son, and there

  655. is community for you here. We you know, you hear us talk a

  656. lot about these neighborhood groups, but just like Pastor Aaron was talking about the

  657. reason that we believe in community so much is because this is where you walk,

  658. this walk out you meet people in the church, but then you go

  659. and when when things get rough, when you have those moments where you're like,

  660. I'm feeling lonely, Oh my ex is being nice to me? Has

  661. he changed? You know? You have a friend that says, girl,

  662. now like what do we got to do to get you away from him?

  663. You know? And so so you build that community so you have those friends.

  664. It's just so essential. I know that we're always talking about the neighborhood

  665. groups, but it really is such an important aspect of what church is to

  666. have. You know, you're talking about a five year mentally abusive relationship,

  667. and at that time that probably was your main relationship. Generally speaking, if

  668. you're in a relationship with somebody who's mentally abusive, one of the things that

  669. happens is that he likely isolated you from community. That's the first thing that

  670. emotionally and mentally abusive partners will do. So you have been living in an

  671. isolated state for a certain amount of time. Community is the medicine for that

  672. and to be able to be open and honest with people that you can trust.

  673. So I would jump online and look at all of the neighborhood groups.

  674. Here's the great thing about the neighborhood groups. There's no commitment to a neighborhood

  675. group. You can go and you can see if it's the right fit.

  676. If it's not the right fit, you can go and find another one and

  677. until you find the right community, and then you can sit there and then

  678. you can build your core group of friends. But I want to encourage you.

  679. If you've just come out of an emotionally abusive relationship where isolation was at

  680. the forefront, which I would put all my money on that, then community

  681. is where you need to be and the church is where you need to be

  682. and a support system for you and your son is here when you find the

  683. community. So I would just get involved with if you if you're not serving,

  684. find a ministry that you love that you feel God is calling you to.

  685. You can find a community there and just let that happen again. Like

  686. I said, organically, Uh, but we're here for you. But in

  687. those moments where you feel like isolation is creeping back in, where the X

  688. might be coming back in, how you can just completely cut ties. That's

  689. where the community is going to come in and really walk alongside you. I

  690. don't have an answer for that. I don't have an answer for how can

  691. I stay strong in those moments because I'm not with you in those moments.

  692. But you know who will be with you in those moments, the community that

  693. you will choose to be here and they will be able to pray with you,

  694. they will be able to strengthen you spiritually, and then they will be

  695. able to guide you if you don't know where you can find rest and peace

  696. in scripture for you in those moments. It's good. Yeah, that's great.

  697. I want to I want to just add a pastor aaronad We try our

  698. best year at a a living that we try to make it as clear as

  699. possible to know kind of your steps in journey of faith in the church.

  700. And so this goes to anyone else who's maybe re engaging with their faith and

  701. in church is number one what our staff We go over it all the time

  702. as a staff. We say, Hey, one of the first thing we

  703. want to encourage every person to do is if you've never been baptized before,

  704. to be baptized. So, if you've given your life to Christ, you've

  705. never been baptized. Water baptism, which we have coming up in a couple

  706. of weeks, is a great display of what outwardly inwardly happen in your life

  707. that outwardly does. It's a commandment of Christ. Only two things Jesus tells

  708. us to do before he goes to heaven. He says, take communion often,

  709. which remembers his death and resurrection what he's died for us. And he

  710. says, and be water baptized, which signifies to the world I'm a new

  711. creation. And so we always say, if you've never been water baptized,

  712. be water baptized. The second, and you may have done at one point

  713. when you were twelve or nine or whatever, be rewater, baptized where this

  714. means something. You know, if it really meant something, then that's great.

  715. But do it now if you've never done it. The second thing we

  716. always say is we say, go through growth Track. That's a great opportunity

  717. where not only you can learn about the church, but you could discover your

  718. purpose in your faith. And so we go through Growth Track. We always

  719. repeat this with our team. And then we say the next thing is if

  720. you've never been through forward, you go through Forward. Forward is a great

  721. place what we call our deliverance ministry where you begin to heal from some of

  722. these things that you're talking about, to address it and to then worship God

  723. and really break free from those things. And then lastly, there's two other

  724. elements that we encourage to do. Is if you go through, if you

  725. baptize, growth track forward, we say serving, which is one way of

  726. being part of our community. So now be able at the end of growth

  727. track they tell you about that. So now it's being part of the family.

  728. So you can meet new people and have people pray for you by serving

  729. within the community. Because that's what makes our big church smaller. And then

  730. the last thing, which Sana said is neighborhood groups. So those are five

  731. things. Those are our small groups. Those are really for anyone that's a

  732. year to five years within our church's lifespan. There's five things that you can

  733. begin to engage with that I'm telling you will radically impact your emotional well being,

  734. your spiritual wellbeing, your faith in Christ. Then there's your personal things

  735. that you could do. But those things in the church structure, you could

  736. do that right away. We always have one of those going on, and

  737. they don't have to happen in any sequential order other than grow trak and serving.

  738. But everything else you could forwards going on you could do forward. If

  739. a women's not he's coming, go to women's night, neighborhood groups meaning go

  740. to neighborhood groups. But those five things will radically impact your walk on top

  741. of the personal things, which is reading your Bible and spending time with the

  742. Lord. Those are important. But when you're saying, how does the community

  743. be a part of this? Those five things, and we really could not

  744. make that any more clear. And all of that is biblical. It's all

  745. God's design. What we say part of the discipleship process. It's all part

  746. of God's designed to make us the best version of ourselves, being full of

  747. the Holy Spirit. So I encourage you to do those any of those if

  748. you haven't done them yet, and they're always on our website and connect tab,

  749. events tab, you'll always find those things going on when they're up and

  750. coming, pastor, and you have anything else on it. I think you

  751. said no perfectly, thank you, sir. I knew you're gonna say forward,

  752. so I know that's your jam. Yeah. I went to Forward,

  753. not because I work here. I'm a member. Yeah, I'm a member

  754. of a bundant, living family church. I want to grow, I want

  755. to be se free. I went to Forward. It just so happens that

  756. I'm entrusted to teach you. But I have to grow as well. I

  757. have to be discipled as well. That's why we're such advocates of it.

  758. Yeah. Absolutely. I've also seen the fruit of so many people that when

  759. they go through it, they're like, oh my goodness, like you get

  760. what you put into it as simple as that, you know. So that's

  761. great. All right, let's do we got time one more question. Let's

  762. ended off with well, you know, with this one. Let's see what

  763. this one is. As a Christian woman, how do you date in your

  764. forties? Is there any Christian women dating here in their forties and above?

  765. After a divorce and with fear to even initiate conversations or invite a guy to

  766. coffee? Or do I invite? Do I invite at all? Should the

  767. guy initiate? Help? So I hear you so now as you're not a

  768. single, but I think you met Nathan in your forties. No, I

  769. was in my thirties, thank you very much. Yeah, sorry, but

  770. I was single in my thirties. So after a divorce, fear to even

  771. initiate a conversation? Yeah, I can only imagine after a divorce it would

  772. be really intimidating just to be put yourself out there again? How do I

  773. do this? Time has changed the world has changed so much, you know,

  774. in the last even ten years, I would not I personally, I

  775. think it's absolutely okay for a woman to initiate a conversation. I think it's

  776. even okay for a man for a woman to invite a man to coffee.

  777. Now, you know, biblically speaking, when you get into a relationship and

  778. you get into a marriage and the man leading, and you know, that's

  779. a whole nother subject. But I don't see I personally don't see anything wrong

  780. with a woman initiating a date. I don't know, what do you guys

  781. think I did. I'm saying you wouldn't have met Nathan, then I did.

  782. I did, And I'm just kidding. Well yeah, yeah, yeah,

  783. yeah, I mean I know I have I think. No, it's

  784. a tough world out there, and uh, it's not easy to be single,

  785. let alone after a divorce, you know, where you're having to you

  786. know, we don't know when they got married, how long they've been married,

  787. and so, uh, there's a lot of fear factors there of just

  788. weird people out there now and dating sites and all those kinds of things.

  789. So, but at the end of the day, there are men that could

  790. be very, very shy, and you're waiting for him to ask you,

  791. and he'll never ask you. Well, I think a lot of it also

  792. has to do with the fact that in recent times the world has just changed

  793. where men are scared to ask women because women are you know, the rules

  794. have changed in the sense of a society. Yes, yes, exactly,

  795. and so women they're intimidated by the idea of like asking a woman out,

  796. because a woman, you know, automatically will shut down, and so a

  797. lot of times they'll just be I'm not going to even talk to a woman,

  798. because every time I try to talk to a woman, a woman will

  799. be like, you know, who do you think you are? Come and

  800. talking to me? Are me too? That's right? Zech? I hear

  801. you over there? You also want to ask you out to coffee? I

  802. hear, yes, ask them out, and so get them some coffee.

  803. Somebody, that's my friend. I've been in form Uh, women have my

  804. ADHD of women. If just for a moment, women, if I can

  805. encourage you to just sort of and this is so against society's norms of advice,

  806. but can you sit in your femininity from time to time and not have

  807. to be so I can do all the things by myself and and and and

  808. come off a little bit intimidating to men, because I do think that that

  809. adds to the fact that men are having a hard time approaching women because women

  810. have had to because of everything that's gone on in our past. And I

  811. know I'm speaking generally, but a lot of times women feel like they have

  812. to do everything, and we can come off unapproachable. And so because we

  813. can come off unapproachable, men are not approaching us. So so in that

  814. sense, yes, women, I think that we can invite a man to

  815. coffee, but remember when we are doing that, to still come from a

  816. place of femininity, so that we aren't sort of the I can't think of

  817. the word we're not dominating the relationship, because if you start off a relationship

  818. being the dominant one, then you're gonna have to continue being the dominant one.

  819. And generally that's not what we like women, and that's not how God

  820. designed it. So yeah, I think I think as a woman like once

  821. you make your wink and you show your ankle, yeah, like if he

  822. don't respond and take it from there, then like don't cut him off,

  823. so like end it from there and that week and that ankle could just be

  824. like I love coffee. Do you love coffee? If home boy don't get

  825. the hit at that point, then trust me in the marriage, he ain't

  826. gonna get the hints that you're trying to drop either, So make it kind

  827. of known like I like some coffee, or hey, you've been here a

  828. lot, you will like But if he don't catch it at that point,

  829. then just there's another one out there. There's a they're gonna be out there.

  830. Don't don't. Don't bring your your pants up higher than your ankle to

  831. try and get attention. He don't get it, so just I'll move it

  832. on. I'll say, very very briefly, I'm a girl dad. So

  833. my oldest daughter is very old now she's twenty eight, but we would have

  834. walks and she would talk about guys that were interested. And the world has

  835. changed, but I don't believe the Kingdom of God hash so, so hey,

  836. this man needs to be very clear on what his intentions are. So

  837. I would still as you've challenged women, I would still also challenge men,

  838. just because the culture perpetuates that women are like this, and women are not

  839. godly women, not women that are submitted to Christ. It's women that are

  840. influenced by the culture. So if a man has biblical values and it sounds

  841. like this, this woman wants companionship, and that's honorable, but there's relational

  842. risk. So then that's prayer and healing from the last relationship. But a

  843. man has to shoot his shot and push through the rejection because a man's a

  844. leader, a man's an initiator, and that's how I would because I have

  845. two younger daughters, so it's just like, yeah, be intentional, but

  846. I don't. When when Pastor adup saying wink and ankle, I started like,

  847. wait, hold up, man, I got daughters. But that's just

  848. me from a man's perspective, having daughters and praying for their future husbands,

  849. Like you got to shoot your shot because you love God, you have faith,

  850. you have value that like, but that's my passion. So yeah,

  851. we differ on that one a little bit passer, which is which is a

  852. great thing because so many get rejected so they just end up walking away giving

  853. up. Yeah, but I mean, look, you were a different guy

  854. back then. So I honestly believe that there's nobody and this is my person.

  855. You have a right to disagree. Everybody has a right disagree that if

  856. you if you God said he give you the desires of your heart. Okay,

  857. I believe the Bible. If if you want to get married, you'll

  858. get married. But there's a lot of things you're going to have to go

  859. through. It's not gonna be what you want and the way you want.

  860. But if you're serious. You'll get somebody. Go get a job, be

  861. financially stable, be emotionally stable, get your life together. Start dressing nice,

  862. start smelling nice, start getting in shape. Start, uh, you

  863. know, get rid of the hostility, the anger, all the men issues

  864. that you have. You'll you will now become attractive, and now you can

  865. put yourself out there, whether it's the ankle, whether it's the website,

  866. whether it is hey, you want your coffee. Oh you don't want to

  867. know God, that's okay, Next one, next one, next one,

  868. next. I'll find somebody. Believe me, if I wanted somebody, I'd

  869. find somebody. But you know, I'd be praying, believe in God,

  870. and then I'd be doing everything to get myself together so that I am attractive

  871. and a blessing to somebody. And then I'd go for it. I'd use

  872. I think there's a great scripture. I don't know if they can Proverbney eighteen

  873. nine. I'll just walk around port in honey, stretched in honey, just

  874. want taste it. Yeah yeah, lets you close this off faster anyway,

  875. Let's go. Wasn't that fun? It's okay? Huh yeah, good good,

  876. Thanks for bringing Thanks for bringing the questions and we try to bring the

  877. conversation and if if we have offended anybody, then we apologize and you're right

  878. and do whatever you were going to do. Anyway, So an email pastor

  879. Aaron your complaints. Yeah, he takes them. The guy who's got the

  880. Jewish test too, and he's got a Jewish last name, Yeah, Levy,

  881. I did my ancestor dot com. I'm Nigeria, you're Nigeria anyway.

  882. You know, I want to end with this by getting serious for a moment

  883. and talk about something that is very important, and that's our condition of our

  884. heart and our relationship with Jesus Christ. If I was asking you today who

  885. is Jesus to you? I probably think there'll be a vast amount of answers.

  886. Some say, you know what, he was this cool hippie dude who

  887. kind of fed a lot of people, and he did a lot of miracles

  888. and he healed a lot of people. There's a great humanitarian and he did

  889. a lot of good society and that's why I like him. But you know

  890. what, it's more than just simply that in your beliefs. It's about do

  891. you believe in a suffering savior? Do you believe in that aspect of Jesus.

  892. Yes, all that is true, all that I just said is true.

  893. But there's a whole other side of Jesus that you have to accept if

  894. you really want to believe in Jesus. Not just the miracles, not just

  895. the healing, not just the parable worker, not just the g nice guy,

  896. that fed guy, Not just the guy fed people who gave great teachings,

  897. who touch little children. It's the other side of Jesus, the one

  898. that suffered, was marred and beaten, and he looks at you and he

  899. says, is what I did worth you following me? Not just believing,

  900. but following me? And that's really where it lands today. You can believe

  901. in Jesus. He's a parable worker, he's a miracle worker, he's a

  902. healer, But will you follow him as the savior of your life, as

  903. the Lord of your life, as the one that died for your sins,

  904. that bled and was martin beaten on that cross to bring you into relationship with

  905. God so that you could be forgiven of sins, so that you never have

  906. to experience separation from God and judgment of your sin, but have everlasting life.

  907. That's really what it means to believe in Jesus Christ more than a Christmas

  908. story in Eastern story. Will I follow this man and give my life to

  909. him. That's where it's settled. Right there, you say, without a

  910. shout of a doubt, I'm a Christian, but kind of writing the fence

  911. of compromise. I say I'll never do something, and the next thing I

  912. know, I'm doing it, and I'm repenting and I'm full of shame and

  913. guilt and say I'll never do it again, and then temptation comes, and

  914. there I go again. Maybe I need somebody stronger than me to help me

  915. to pray this thing through so that it's the cycle is ended. Or you

  916. say, I love God and everything is great. I'm born of his spirit,

  917. but I'm not filled with His spirit, with the evidence of speaking in

  918. tongues, and I want everything that that early Church had. Not only did

  919. they have a born again experience, they had a spirit filled experience so that

  920. they could go out be witnesses and be empowered by the Holy Spirit. So

  921. for any of these things, to really accept Jesus as your Lord and as

  922. your savior, commit your life to him, rededicate your life or to get

  923. filled. I'm going to count to three, and I'm asking you to raise

  924. your hand like this. Why, Because this Jesus died on a cross,

  925. marred, beaten, the naked, suspended between Earth and Heaven. I have

  926. been saved all my life. And when I was a sinner, I was

  927. unashamed to drink in front of you, cuss in front of you, fight

  928. in front of you, and fornicate in front of you. And now all

  929. of a sudden people get saved and they're ashamed to do it. Jesus publicly

  930. showed his love to you, and you need to do that for him.

  931. You raise your hand now, one two, Your hand won't be the only

  932. hand. Here we go one, two, three, raise your hand wherever

  933. you are all across this auditorium. God love you, God bless you.

  934. I want to lead you in a prayer, simple prayer, just say Jesus.

  935. Jesus, you know who I am, and you know my name,

  936. and you know everything about my life. And I'm at this moment now,

  937. well, I want to make a commitment to you, a lifelong commitment to

  938. you. I'm willing to turn to you. And when I turn to you,

  939. I know I will be able to turn from sin. So I ask

  940. you now to accept me as I am, and I believe with all my

  941. heart that Jesus now is the Lord part of my life. Amen. Amen,