Crossing the Finish Line With Strength

There is none that is righteous.

I was born with sin in iniquity that my mother conceived me.

I needed Jesus who would take away all my sin.

Prior to that, I was without covenant.

I was an alien.

I had the Bible says I had the wrath of God abiding on me.

And then Jesus and His mercy came and took all that away.

You can receive all this for free by faith.

That's what's being offered to you.

Welcome to the CityLight Church podcast. Thanks

for joining us today as we look into God's Word and

discover the hope and truth that He has for us. If

you want to connect with CityLight Church, feel free

to visit us at citylightnyc.com that's citylightnyc.com.

Pastor Boyan

Jansik and his team believe that the power of the Holy Spirit is already

working in our hearts and minds. As you

listen to today's teaching, remember that

you are deeply loved by God. That you

are surrounded by His grace and that

He has a real hope and a future for you. Hallelujah. God

is

good. He's so

faithful. And Lord,

may you keep coming. He came.

He just,

shh. But yeah,

it doesn't mean he has to stop. I pray

we have Acts chapter 10. Peter got

Acts 10 · chapter mention

interrupted in his sermon. I would

like to be interrupted in my sermon. Hallelujah. We're

Lord,

you know, you have us in the palm of your hand, whatever you

want to do in here. You're the

God of miracles. The God

who reaches in transforms our lives. And I

have this nice message on paper, but somebody

needs to hear this. Get out

of God's way. You have

some problems and you're coming to God to fix

your problems, but you're

coming to Him with a rule book like a menu. God, this

is what I need you to do. And this

is how I would feel comfortable that you

would do it. This is

how I want, it doesn't work that way. You give

Him your problem and then step back. It's uncomfortable.

It feels

like walking on water. That was

uncomfortable. But that's

when His best work is done. Let go.

God's not

somebody you hired. He's not

like an outside consultant. Now you're

in a pinch. Now I

hired God. Even paid

my tithe, paid him. Now I

want him to tackle this issue that I have. We all

have, and it easily comes back, even when

it's down, these layers over our heart. Let God

peel you like an onion layer upon layer upon layer and let

that brick wall fall down. That's when

He has access to the real youth. When you're

intimate with Him, you open up. That's when

He can do what He really wants to do. That's when

miracles start popping like popcorn. But you've

got a yield. Hallelujah. Well,

we

had a wonderful volunteer party yesterday. So grateful

for all of the volunteers at CityLight. And we have

that annual party. We try to

honor you all the time. We're grateful for

you all the time. But that's our

way of just saying an extra special thank you and honoring all

of the people that serve at CityLight. We have a huge

percentage of members and attenders that actually serve. And

we're grateful for

that. That doesn't mean that

we should stop. If you're not serving,

find a place to serve. You can serve. Someone

can serve as

little as once a month, right? But get involved. Yeah.

Don't just come

to

church, be the church. Look at Him. He's

not even five

minutes in. He's rebuked me 17

times already. I heard that was

the Grace Church. I checked out the

Google reviews. Everyone said how nice

it was. Now He's already offended

me. 13 ways. He hasn't

even started

preaching really. But let's look at

that video from the Volunteer Party yesterday. Welcome back Carter. I

love royalty-free internet

music. There's just a certain

anointing on it and makes God's anointing

leave. But no, we had

a great time. Thank you to all

of our volunteers. Everyone you see there

is a volunteer. Our awesome ministry of

helps. I always read Romans

Romans 16 · chapter mention

chapter 16 at the Volunteer Party where the Apostle Paul

lists over 20 names an entire chapter in

the Bible. And these people's names,

you never heard of them before? You'll never heard of

them again. But they're immortalized in

the Word of God. Guys with names like

Rufus. How that later turned

into a dog's name, I don't know. But there were humans

named Rufus. Paul said I want

to honor Phoebe. Rufus. And other Greek

names

I mispronounced yesterday. But what's the point

of an entire chapter, Roman 16, it shows you that

Paul knew every one of them and God knows every

one of them. And they were really

volunteers, helps ministry. Those called alongside to

lay up bricks in this building that is God, not

a physical church building, but the building of

the body of Christ, that God is building

up. Hallelujah. Are you ready

to

receive this morning? That's great. For the

first two

rows. That's great. Also, summer

life groups

are started. Yeah. They last for

only

six weeks, and are only 75

minutes in length. Normal life groups in

the fall and spring are 12 weeks long,

and everybody has a

different book. In the summer we

all read one book. In this book in

particular, I wanted you to read, and it'll make even

more sense when I'm done preaching today. But it's a way

to avoid the summer slump. Summer swamp is a

better term. What is it about

the summer that things, just, I've been doing

this enough decades now to know that things just get

swampy. And people can kind

of lose the fire. And you don't want

that to happen. You want to stay

plugged in. Six weeks, 75 minutes,

it's a way to stoke the flame. Meet all some people.

Be disciples. Oh, I'm

already a

disciple. Great. Help disciple others.

Amen. Are you ready

for

the word of God this morning? Yes. Okay. Many of

you

know

my story that I immigrated here when I was five

years old in the early 80s. And I came from

a country formerly known as Yugoslavia. It's now six other

countries. And every summer I

would go back there to visit family and

spend the summers there. And that first summer

in 1982, I was six years old. I went back. And

since I was

six, I didn't know how to swim yet. My grandfather wanted to

teach me how to swim. And it's in Montenegro,

a little beach called Igolo. And it's like a

little bay area. And the background was

the former dictator, Tito's giant villa, a

giant lawn. And that's where my

grandfather, I can remember this

like it happened yesterday where he taught me

how to swim. And one of the

first things I did when I learned how to swim was start to use a

floaty. I couldn't use one

before, because if I flipped

over, I drowned. But now I learned

how to swim. And I would always

see the adults on, floaty is a term

for everything. floaty could be like

things you put around your arms. But I'm talking about

the ones you kick back and relax and lie on, right? And I'd see adults

doing that just laying out their hands behind their

head, floating. And I wanted to

be a big boy. So I'm six years

old. I borrowed my older

cousins floaty, bringing in three feet

into the water. I can see my

grandfather right there. And I get on

the floaty. I put my hands

behind my back. And I am big

bow. I am a hater.

I remember I'm looking

at the clouds. I closed my eyes.

And I didn't fall

asleep. I just closed my

eyes for about three or four minutes. And I then went

to open my eyes. I went, huh? And

I was looking

at a completely different place. And when where's my

grandfather? I started to panic

right away. I'd only gone about

50 or 100 meters to the right. Not even that far.

But I started crying,

screaming. Ah! Dino! We just

grandpa!

Where

are you? And

he comes running.

He's all over here.

And I realized, huh?

The current. Even though

it's a

bay, very few waves and ripples, it just happened. I

drifted away. I

want to tell

you right now that the greatest enemy that I see when people, you know,

when they backslide fully and forsake the faith, when they walk away

from the Lord, you're really seeing the

final result. You're seeing the final

phase, what happened and how they got there is much more subtle

and it's slow drift. And nobody is immune

to it. I just want to

read to you several statements. The danger is not

usually rebellion overnight. You might hear, so

all of somebody just looks like they lost their mind. They just rebelled against

God. They used to be

on fire. They used to come

to church. They were a leader.

And now they're completely,

did you see their

social media and what they're posting? They've gone nuts. That

didn't happen overnight.

You're just seeing the

fruit underneath that for months, maybe years, they were

slowly, slowly drifting. So the danger is

not rebellion overnight. The danger is drift.

It's not an explosion.

It's slow erosion. It's

not a sudden

fall, but a slow cooling

of the heart. And so Christianity and

our fire, our passion for the

Lord, it's something that has

to be maintained. This is something I'm

beginning to teach my kids. You know, when they're

young, everything's exciting. I mean, when they're

young, you want to pray out, pray out. Jesus, close your eyes.

What do you see?

I see Jesus. You

know, everything's exciting.

And then slowly, especially,

where's my son? Where's

the victor? Where

is he? He

went, what? He

went downstairs. Michelle,

run downstairs. Bring

him up here.

Yeah, he just went.

Look, it's like he

could pay him off. He's got lawyers. He

just went. Actually,

he's volunteering. He

should be behind

the camera, but I just noticed,

as I'm talking about my family, that Vlad, we look

nothing alike. You cannot be my

son. Emily, can you help

me out with the young victor? With the wherever? No,

but wherever he

went. Oh, he went to

the restroom. Michelle's going to have

a hard time. Okay. This could turn

into

a real life example of how not the

parent right about now. I met this investor,

successful investor. And he said to

me, you know, all companies, no matter

how hot they are, they trend to zero,

eventually. And he's telling me

about where billionaires park and keep their

money. Which haven't you ever

wondered, where do they keep their money? I have always wondered

that. I mean, it's not

at the local city bank. It's not. Where do

you keep

5.6 billion? Do you have a

concentrated position? I mean, are you

all in Tesla? Are you all in

Bitcoin? Turns out the majority

of them, they keep their money

in the S&P. They've diversified over hundreds

of companies because all companies, eventually,

no matter how hot

they are, trend to zero. Like, when I was

a kid, you know, it was a really

hot company, IBM. IBM was in. One

was the last

time you even saw an IBM. Over time, all companies

eventually collapse or get taken over

or get bought out or become irrelevant. Do you remember when

you were in 10th grade, you learned about this

thing called entropy, that things that are

in order tend to chaos and disorder? I'm experiencing that in

my house in the Poconos. During COVID, we bought

a house in the Poconos. I hardly go there

because I'm pretty busy on the weekends. So we've gotten up

now. We're going there like

three, four times a year. I mean, the kids

and Emily go in the summer. But most of the

year, it's sitting empty. Is there your Airbnb

in being it? No. What's the point

of

taking off our shoes every time we go into the

house? And not stepping on

the couch is what, have you ever... You've

been a renter.

You know what you

did to that house? I don't want... I

know what I

do to a hotel. Anyway. It's a joke.

You

know where I

went back to James Gaffigan. You know James Gaffigan?

He talked about coming

out of the shower naked in the hotel room and sitting naked on

the couch. And then he said,

as I sat naked

on that hotel couch, the thought occurred to

me. I may not be

the first person doing this. Everybody behaves differently in

a room. That's not their own,

you know. In the Poconos, the

forest is fighting

for my house. It's coming in. Like

the worst thing

for a house is not to live

in the house and maintain the house. Things tend to disorder.

Things tend to drift.

Things tend to entropy.

And I want to

finish strong. I'm looking at my

life. I'm a little concerned

about the present. I'm looking at 40

years from now. How will I finish

the race? Will I cross the

finish line? Will I do it

with strength? Or, you know what

used to terrify me? When I first got

saved, I was 16, served

the Lord, then went off to

college, joined the on fire

radical group of college kids, and we go to

the local church. And you can't help

but notice all the older people love us. They love us. They

love us. And

they say, oh,

you're fiery. And you're so zealous.

And we're all there,

we're in love with Jesus. And then during the

sermon, I'll look around. And

it's like all

the older people who had test them I've been saved 20

years. So I got saved

in the early 70s. The great revival that

swept through Long Island. And you look at

them. And they're like zoned

out during worship, yawning during the preaching

of the Word. And I had that

as an 18-year-old. I thought, why? Why

do some of

these adults that have been saved the longest? You think they know

God, the deepest. And they look totally

like they're bored of God. How do you get

bored of God? The things of God

are bottomless. He's not simple. He's

not simple. Oh,

I figured you

out on board now. It's a never-ending journey.

And then you realize

as you get older, you're like, oh, okay,

it does take a fanning and a stoking of

the flame. Because things tend towards

entropy. Things tend towards drift.

And I don't want

that for me. I don't want that

for you. No, no, no. We've

got to finish

strong. Look at the Apostle

Paul. Second Timothy, chapters four,

six through eight. He says, I have

fought for I'm already being poured out as a drink offering.

I mean, he knew

in his spirit it was time for him to go. And look, by the

way, I can just preach your message and I'm already being

poured out as a drink offering. Because you know what

he was saying? I'm dying empty. It

was Miles Monroe

who said, the wealthiest places in

the world are not the oil fields of Saudi Arabia. They're

not the diamond

mines of South Africa. The wealthiest place in

the world is out Wall Street. The wealthiest place in

the world is cemeteries. Because of all these

people who've died, pregnant, full, full of vision. They're

in the tomb.

They're in the coffin.

But they never wrote

that book. They were supposed to

write. They never started that

business. They never planted that

church. God put that treasure

in them. And they never gave

birth to it. They're dead six feet

under buried. That's wealth underground. Paul

didn't have that

testimony. He said everything that

was in my heart to do. I did. All that

God put

in me. He got out of

me. I'm being poured out

a total drink offering. I'm done. I want

to die

empty. I don't want to

die full. Empty. All that you

put

in me. Lord, get it out

of me. Hallelujah. He knew in

his

spirit. It's time for me

to go. I believe that's good.

That's healthy. When you're

walking close

to the Lord, you think death is

a surprise? Everybody went down in

Tampa. Pastor, all the Holy

Ghosts all the time. And it's not faith

and doubt and unbelief. I'm just feeling my

spirit. The Lord is shh.

I'm transitioning over. Next

verse, verse seven.

I fought the good

fight. I have finished the

race. I have kept the

faith. No drift, no slow

decline. But I'm crossing the

finish line with gusto. Can you shout amen?

Finally, there is laid

up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the

righteous judge will give to me on that day. And not to me

only but also to all who have loved his appearing. Acts 20, verse 24.

Acts 20:24

However, I consider my

life worth nothing to me. My only aim is

to finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me. The task of testifying

to the good news of God's grace. Just say this out

loud as a confession of faith. I'm going to finish

the race with strength. First Corinthians 9, 24.

And then I want

to go into a questionnaire that we should ask ourselves at least once a week. Spiritual checkups are healthy.

And we should all

conduct spiritual checkups on ourselves. Because we have line

spots and drift happens. Ideally, you have people

around you that keep you from drifting. But we live in

a culture and a time where in America really, you know, when you

visit other places and you're in touch with other cultures, you realize there's other

cultures that people are in your business all the time. And that's normal. They

still have the

mentality of a village that's normal. They realize the benefit

of that. Not so great for

privacy. Not so great for

that. America has. It runs

through everything.

Nation was birthed in

independence and rebellion. It's a fact. And

so what runs

through us is a fiercely independent spirit. So even in close

relationships, there's taboo subjects to talk about. Like how often do

you have a friend that goes, you know, I feel like you've missed church a lot lately. Or you're coming to

church all the time, but it's not the same. Are you all right?

Who are you to

question me? But the Bible says

faithful are the wounds of a friend. A real friend will

ask some difficult questions. But we live in

a culture where that doesn't often happen. It's like, why are

you digging in my salad? I leave you alone.

Leave me alone. It's

none of your

business. That's between me. I

once asked that.

That's between when I

was doing evangelism, you know, in college door to door. I said, you know,

if you were to die today, do you know for certain that you go to heaven? And the person went

back, that's between me and my God. Oh, okay. I'm here

to help.

That's private. Jesus didn't

keep things

private. He died naked on

a mountain, elevated on a cross. There's no closet Christianity,

amen. Anything holy can be

shattered from the rooftops. So, do you know

that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize, run in such a

way as to get the prize with determination, with focus. I'm asking

you today,

how do you, how do you want to be serving the Lord when you're 60, when you're 70, when

you're 80, when you're 90? I've made plans. I'm

not going to

retire. You don't see it

in the Bible. I'm going to refire.

It doesn't mean I'll

be here preaching. I may be at

that time. Pastor Emeritus sitting here.

Just praying into the

thing and discipling and mentoring the next wave of leadership. But where am I

going to go? Go and retire in

Miami. Go to Boca. So

I can backslide

and then Satan take me out in my 80s as I slowly drift away. Go live in Margaritaville.

What? Oh. Run with

determination,

run,

run and see yourself serving the Lord. Hallelujah. Next verse. Verse

25.

Do you

not know

that in a race all the runners run, but okay, everyone who

competes in the games. It's amazing how much

power the media team has. I mean, it's like

I'm like, Lord, you control the service, but really? The media team. And

so if you

start to feel the heavy hand of God on you back there, that's why. Everyone who competes in

the games goes into strict training. They do it to

get a crown that will not last, but we do it

to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore, I do not

run like someone running aimlessly. He's saying, I am

efficient. I am focused. I

work smarter, not

harder. I do not fight

like a boxer beating the air. I'm not shadow punching

here. He's saying, I'm not

playing any games. I'm making everything I

do count and it's with purpose. No, I strike a

blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not

be disqualified for the prize. So I want to

give you a spiritual health checklist, something that we should

ask ourselves at least once a week. And let me just

say this, I recognize that drift happens. I recognize that you

have to have things set up in your life to combat drift. I'm not talking about

backsliding. In fact, just with

somebody I'm mentoring, I said, be careful you're not

drifting. The first thing they

said was, I'm not backsliding. I said, I didn't

say backsliding. Be careful you're not

drifting. I'm not having sex,

I'm like, bro. Okay, I'm glad. But

I didn't mention

any of those things. I'm just talking about

drifting. We have to keep

a fire in our relationship. I mean, we don't

want to just drift slowly. Drifting is subtle. It's

subtle until it

isn't. Then all of a

sudden you're doing things you never thought you'd be doing. You go to read

the Bible and you're like, oh, satanic confusion comes in

because you haven't kept your mind sharp with the word of God. So we need spiritual

health checkups. So here's several questions

number one. And this is an

important one. I could have put

it anywhere but I put it number one because it's the most offensive one. Has my giving and

my generosity toward God's kingdom increased or decreased? Why is it offensive

because it has to do with money? Why is that offensive?

Because money is people's

God. And the moment you

mentioned money, people start winging out. Especially when a pastor

mentions money. It's their self interest

there and why he's preaching that. No, Jesus said that.

He's the one who

continuously connected how you handle money and generosity to your heart condition. He said, quote, where

your treasure is, there your heart is also. So if you want

to know how on fire you are, stick a thermometer in your giving and see how it reads. When people are in

love with God, they are aware of how much they've been given and they hold the

things of this earth loosely. And so your giving

is a reflection of how much God has captured your heart. One of the first

things to go before you backslide, not one of the first, always the first thing

to go is people stop giving. And I'll just say

this, I haven't counted an offering in over 20 years. I have no clue.

But the reality is

when CityLight was eight people, I was counting the offering. That was awkward and weird.

I couldn't wait to stop

counting the offering. But that's the one thing

I was told is, but then I quickly noticed. All of a sudden someone

stops giving or they're like completely lower their giving. You're like, huh, then they

stop giving and then you never see them. Oh, Jesus is Lord of

all. Really, you're wallet too. There

is a connection. When

God in Acts chapter

Acts 10 · chapter mention

10 was looking for somebody to spread the gospel to the Gentiles. He sent an angel to

Cornelius. And that angel said, I've

come here. You got God's attention because

of your prayers and your giving. Wow. You connect giving to

the

anointing to prayers? Yeah, because it shows what's

in people's hearts. People who I'm close to,

they all have something in common. They're generous. And if you're

new here,

you don't know my story. I gave 2.131 million dollars

to the church personally last year. I paid back the church

everything. It's ever paid me since

2002. I can't go into any

more details. Ask another member. They've heard

it already, enough

times. But in case somebody, you

have a guest, oh, God. It's the first time here

and he's talking about money as his first point. All right, I'm fine. God

has blessed me. My

cup, run it over.

How did J. Z. say

it? Run it over with honey.

All right. My cup, run

it. I

can't rhyme it. He

does that word bending

where he rhymes anything with anything. And I did that so

he would continue to have my heart. Every time you give, you're

showing God, you can trust me with more. Money hasn't become my God.

Hallelujah. So stick with the

moment

in your giving. And it doesn't just have

to do with a tie than the offering. It's how you treat people.

When I'm looking for close

friends, they have to be generous. I want to go out

with people where I have to pay for that check. Pretend to go to the

bathroom and pay for that check. Because if I don't, they'll

do that. You know, you're the same

way. Not maybe this way, but

how long does your cheap skate friendship last? How long is it? How

long do you go

on with somebody who's always calculating in their mind? And I'm going to make

sure I come out on top and they got last time. Somebody with a scrawny skinny

heart like that, something is wrong. Something is broken. They need

Jesus. They need

healing. But we

can't go deep

because you're a heart that is close to give, is a heart that is

close to receive. Amen. So number one in

a

spiritual checklist is stick a thermometer in your giving and go. And honestly, check your, evaluate

your generosity. Number two, important question, which

is why I see so many of you with your phones taking notes. Have I become slower to

forgive and quicker to take offense? How am I forgiving? These

two questions are actually

so important. How is my giving and

how quickly do I forgive people? Because when you're walking with

the Lord, you are acutely aware of all of the crud, the nonsense, the sin he

has forgiven you. And you're so grateful that

you go through life with soft, gracious, merciful eyes, and you extend that forgiveness

quickly to others. When you're quick to take

offense, you're not living in light of how much God has forgiven you. Your heart has shriveled up.

You've become the Grinch whose

heart was two sizes too small. Can you imagine you have

been forgiven of all of your sins past, present, and future? That's a lot. And then

somebody offends you

and you, you get an attitude with them. And you get hurt. And

you get all cold

and bitter. You just fell into a

demonic trap. The Bible talks about the

root of bitterness. It defiles many. When you're

close with the

Lord, you're living in light of this revelation. Everything about my life, prior

to Jesus, everything about my very existence was in a front to heaven. You're aware of that, right?

I'll just talk about me

then. But the Bible says it's

about all of humanity. There is none that seeks

after God. There is none that is

righteous. I was born with sin

in iniquity that my mother conceived me. I needed a savior. I

needed Jesus who would

take away all my sin. Prior to that, I was

without covenant. I was an alien. I

had the, the Bible

says I had the wrath of God abiding on me. And then Jesus and His

mercy came and took all that away. If you haven't made Jesus

your Lord in savior, you can receive all this for free by faith. That's what's being offered to

you. And he did that for

me. Now, someone's going to come

and offend me. And I'm going to hold

a grudge against them. What? Jesus spoke to this

specifically.

He told the parable. He

talked about a man

who had a debt. You can do the calculations.

Last time I did these

calculations 20, 25 years ago was something between 20 and 30 million dollars. This is like Matthew 18,

Matthew 9th, Matthew 18-ish. And he was forgiven this

20 to 30 million dollar debt by the king. He owed it to the

king. And the king said, you

know, back then, when you needed to pay off a debt, they didn't garnish your wages. They put you in prison.

Slave camps and things like

that. So he was on his

way and he fell on his knees as a please forgive me and the king graciously forgave him. And as he was leaving

being forgiven on his way back home, he ran into a lower servant who owed him the equivalent of about 20 bucks. And that servant fell on

his knees and said, please forgive me. And he said, no. The

Bible actually says he

grabbed him by the throat and said, he was Tony soprano. Grab them by the throat

and said, pay me what you owe me with my big. And when the king heard

of that, he said, grab that wicked servant. And this is the quote,

hand him over to the torturers. So Jesus gave this parable

to demonstrate that servant is an example of a Christian who was pardoned of a 30 million dollar debt he could never ever pay. But then he wouldn't pardon

someone else. What happens to that Christian?

They live life in a

tortured state. They're handed over to the

torturers. If you're hanging onto Britannus,

you're hanging onto a grudge. That is showing that you're

not walking in full revelation about God has forgiven you. You've come out of intimacy

with the Lord. You got a Grinch-like heart.

You said, what's step one?

Step one is recognizing how

much what garbage truck full of junk God has forgiven you. We always tend to minimize

our own sins. Sometimes we act like we're

doing God a favor by serving him. Be glad for the oxygen

in your nostrils. Be glad for another day.

You think about your sin.

Now multiply that by a

thousand. That's actually your sin count.

Don't do it too long.

You'll get depressed. Focus on

the blood, forgiveness,

the new birth. But you've been forgiven so

much. Hallelujah. There's some people they

look

for offense. They're like an offense assignment.

You know these people. Maybe

you are these people.

I'm so glad you're here

to hear this. But there's people. They cannot

wait to be

offended. They look for offense. They're

online. You can say

online. I

really like bananas. What

do you mean you

hate oranges? They're ready to rumble. They're

looking to be. And

you know what it

is? They don't even get offended.

They take offense. Somebody said,

oh, I don't

like that person. They offended me. They just

went about their

business. They don't even know what

they did wrong. You took offense. Any opportunity

to get offended.

And by the way, culture

in the last 10 to 15 years has really accelerated this. Because

we reward victimhood. We

prize anyone who's been

hurt. We lift them up. So

now everybody like victimhood

has become a currency in today's culture. So everybody's

running to be

a victim. Why are you nodding that

way? I mean, that's offensive. You've

hurt my feelings. It

seems like you're into

the service. But I don't like the

energy. I'm not comfortable with you

that way. That's the new thing. I'm

not comfortable. My daughter

started saying that.

I don't know where she

learned it. Well, I know where she

learned it in school. But I'm not good. Because

what do you say

to someone? Fella told me. He smokes

cigars. He smelled

like cigar smoke.

He went to the bank.

And the teller said, I'm

not comfortable with you right now. And he's like, what do

you want me to do? I've been smoking? Yeah, I

smoke cigars. But

I'm not comfortable with

you right now. I just want my money.

It's a way to paint

someone into a court. I'm sorry. My very existence

is making

you uncomfortable. How do I change this?

I just want to deposit

this check. Hallelujah. Forgive. You know all

of

therapy.

I'm going to save you

tens of thousands of dollars. All of therapy can be

summarized in one word. All inner healing. All where

they eventually trying

to get you to. You ready? Forgive. Forgive. You

don't know.

But

it's

hard. I know.

Sometimes forgiveness isn't

most of

the time. If it's real bitterness, you're

not going to just go, okay, fine. I forgive them. It's going

to be a

daily process. Sometimes a hundred times a

day. But every time you think

of them and your body tenses up. And you imagine choking them?

Now shift that. And so

a hundred times

a day, you're going to have to go, I release them. I cancel their debt. Say

that out of it.

I cancel it because you're

holding a debt against them. You want retribution. You want

vengeance. You want...

You're even upset

that God,

God who can be the great smiter, hasn't smitten them yet. You're

like, God, why not?

And that's where Jesus served

another man. He's like, I make my

son to shine on the just and on the unjust. I make my reign to

fall on the just and the unjust. And you're back in the

Old Testament and go, but you said vengeance is mine. Say, it's the Lord. You

know what there's, let

me just put a pause on that sermon. There's a scripture in Romans

that says, if somebody offends you, hurts

you, give them a cup of

cold water. For in so doing, you

will heap colds of fire upon their head. How many of you know

that verse? All right. That's great. 20

of you

are reading

your Bible. I'm so encouraged to pass

to this church. Next sermon is going to

be on biblical literacy. Next time they don't miss

it. So some Christians get very

excited. They think it's a formula

and how to get God to punish someone else. Because they read that as,

oh, if someone hurts me,

I give them a cup of cold water. And then God is obligated

to heap colds of hot fire on their heads. Yeah. Really what that's saying

is,

colds, ashes, was a sign

of repentance. It means that when you

are kind to someone who has been unkind to you, your kindness will draw them

to putting ashes on their head to actually repenting. The same way how God's

kindness towards us causes us to repent. Because while we were still

sinners, he was kind to us and he loved us and he forgave us. Amen. Remember, that person who

hurt

you, I'm not belittling whatever they

did. But you're giving them a

gift. Do they deserve it? No.

But you got a

gift.

Did you deserve it? No.

So give that same

gift.

And don't get too bogged

down in the fine print. Whenever I start hitting, bitterness,

resentment, because there's full blown unforgiveness,

then there's the twin cousins

that are more sneaky, bitterness and resentment. Full blown unforgiveness, you can

see 10 miles away. But you know when somebody

mentions that person's name and you just, and it's like somebody threw

a few grains of sand in your heart? Yeah. God's after that. He

doesn't

want those grains

of sand in your heart. When you tense up, so

whenever I preach on that, the people with issues then

want to talk to me and they get into the nitty gritty. They want to know the

rules. They go, all right. So,

can I forgive? But

not forget. No. You

got to forgive

and

forget because God's forgiven. All right. All right. How

about this?

I'll forgive,

but I won't

trust. All right. Why won't you

trust? Because

they hurt me and

I don't want to be heard again. And then what about it

in the abusive situation? What about it in the...

Jesus didn't get into all

that. He just said, forgive. You're

in an abusive situation.

Forgive them. Get away from

them. Get

a restraining order as

you forgive them. That's fine. Don't focus on

all the

little rules. Just forgive. How will I

know? You

will know because it'll

feel like an elephant got lifted off of your neck. That's how you know you

forgiven. Hallelujah. Stop nursing that bitterness.

There's

a demon that comes

and makes you in a sick way. Feel more righteous as you

rehash that person's offenses. And the only one getting

hurt is the person who's been handed over to the torturers. You. Three. Oh, there'll be

no

drift.

No summer swamp. Lord set

us ablaze that

we might burn for you. Like when they saw John

the Baptist, it says he was a bright and shining, burning lamp, cause our flame to not

flicker. Hallelujah. We're not going to

be

flashes in the pan, fly by nights. No stories of I remember.

I remember when he was

on fire. I remember when she was

serving the Lord. Three. Where's my son so

I

can apologize to him? Okay. Am I still burdened

for

lost people? Am I still burdened? This

is a question number

three to ask for our spiritual temperature. Am I still burdened for

lost people? Do I care about people's

eternity? Do I care about the

realities of heaven and hell? This will always show where

you are, where your fire is every single time. Because when you're drifting from

God, you don't really care anymore. You don't think about that.

People, I don't know how

it works, they never, they never care. When I got saved, I

realized very quickly, wow, I'm going to heaven. And all these other people

around me that I love that are in my life that I play sports with, it was going into junior

year of high school, all my hangout friends, none of them have Jesus. None of them have received

the blood sacrifice. None of them have been

born again. They're all hell bound. How

cruel would it be

if I didn't tell them? It's like everybody's poisoned on

an island and you have the antidote and you're like, well, you know, the antidote

is a private thing. People get offended when you

discuss the antidote. And they're like, you know,

I don't talk politics, I don't talk antidote. It reminds me of that

Seinfeld episode. You under 30, there was

in the 90s this show called Seinfeld. It was really big before

there wasn't Netflix, before Max. It was a show set

right here in New York City. And Elaine got this boyfriend.

They never called him a

born again Christian, but he was a born again Christian. I kept talking about God,

God, it was into Jesus. And Elaine is an atheist

on the show. And she turns to a

boyfriend and says, hey, you're always talking about God. Does it bother you that

I don't believe in God? And the boyfriend says, no,

I'm not the one that's going to hell. But most Christians, that was

not a good attitude, by the way. That's not how Christians should

be. Yet that is how many

Christians are. We are here, CityLight church

exists to broadcast the gospel so people can come to Jesus so they can be transferred from

darkness and into his marvelous light. Many people here hear about the

blood of Jesus, the saving grace of God, the power of the cross, the

finished work of the cross, they hear it here for the first time. Those dots are connected and they

realize this is what I need to believe, what I must do to be

saved. This is what we live for.

Oh my goodness. This is what

we live for.

I love you, I'm sorry. This

is why we exist. This

is what you drive and

propel Christians. I believe the volunteers, the ones

who decided to serve, they get that. They're like, oh, I'm helping build

a place that's multiplying the gospel. Stick a thermometer in your personal

witness. Do you actually care? Do you

ever pray for your

coworkers, your neighbors, your friends? Oh, they're Christian, why? Because they

say they are? You

know they have no fruit

of Christianity. Technically, I was a Christian. People

ask, what are you? Well,

I'm not Muslim, I'm not

Jewish. I'm Greek Orthodox. So yeah, I'm

a Christian. Never

read one verse of the

Bible in my life, been to church five times in my life before I was 16, but called myself a Christian. Thank

God somebody didn't go, oh,

you're a Christian, you're good. No, they gave me the gospel.

That's like when people want to

date an unbeliever and you go, hey, are they saved? They go to church. Whenever someone

tells me they go

to church, come on now. When, Christmas and Easter, four times

in the last five years, come on. Are they saved? Amen. Hallelujah. All

right. So, how's

my

giving?

How quickly

am I forgiving? Am

I still burdened for lost

people? Thank you, Jesus. Am I closer

to God, number

four, am I closer to God than I was a year ago? Just ask yourself that. Because there

will be, in your

relationship with the Lord, there will be ups and downs. There's lulls. I experienced that. I

went through

this thing in

2019. I got touched by the fire

of a God in a fresh way. It was incredible. I was like

praying eight to

ten hours a day. I know some of you think

that's what I do now, but it's not. To other things. I was praying

eight to ten

hours a day for months and months and months. I would go alone into St.

Andrews and start at eight in the morning. And I would often have to

go into seven to eight into the night, 12 hours a day. And it was easy. I couldn't

wait to wake up.

You know that? That puppy love

feeling in high

school when you first fell in love? That's how I felt about Jesus.

I'd wake up like Jesus. And

then there were seasons where

I wake up and I wake up all, I got a headache. And it's like, I checked my

phone. I remember this season. I checked

my phone for like

ten days straight. I was living in Brooklyn at

the time. Ten days straight. It was February

and the temperature

was always below ten degrees for ten days. It was like five degrees. How

do I go? Six degrees.

And I had a

dog I

had to walk to. And I slowly waddle over to

the shower. And when the water hit me,

I think, I didn't even say good morning. I didn't even think to you.

I'm not even talking about prayer.

I'm just talking about the thought

to God. There are lows. But even there

are times. I

can't wait to read the

word. There are times where it's, oh

man, I got to read the word. I'll give you just a secret.

Be transparent with the Lord. Because

he knows how you're feeling

about it. He knows what you're going through.

He continually give yourself to him.

That thing that Paul said, I'm

now, I'm being poured out as a drink offering. That speaks to him, dying empty,

giving his life for the gospel. But it also shows how he

viewed himself. He's ready to be poured out.

Be like a vessel that's always

being fully poured out. Nothing held back to the Lord,

even when you're going through the lows. Is this helping anybody today? Amen.

We're going to receive communion

here

in just a little bit. Here's another question. Are we at

number five? What

currently excites me the most?

And guys, like in a little

bit, in like five minutes. Thank you, team. They are awesome.

They're like the

secret service of

CityLight. They like heard the code word. He

says the C word. He said

communion. Praise God. This is

why we rent

the whole

penthouse rooftop for our volunteers, because of that caliber of helps. Now

listen, what do you daydream about?

What really gets your juices flowing? What

pushes your buttons? What excites you?

That's what's captured your

heart. So monitor

that. I used to go

for decades. I

mean, since I got saved, I

had a routine where when I would fall asleep, I would think to Jesus, I would

pray. It would be like I was snuggling

with the Lord every night. How many do you know what I'm

talking about? You're going to bed. You're like, oh,

Lord. Basically, you just

open up your heart

like a sponge and you're receiving his love. You're unburdening

as you drift off to

sleep. It's a beautiful way to fall asleep.

It's what I've done for decades. And

then a couple of years ago,

when I started making that crazy Bitcoin money, and the option started exploding, and I

would see, guys, and I

shared this to get this anointing on you. I shared this for the sake of

prosperity, and if it upsets you, I don't

know what to tell you. That's your problem, not mine. This actually

happened to my life, so

I'm sharing from it. Like I share with you embarrassing stuff.

Everybody loves it. I share a success.

I always got

to talk about that.

I'm watching my portfolio go up on

the daily up or down. Five, six, seven years of what my

annual salary is. That does something to your psyche. So

now I'm going to sleep. On

a bad day, I'm going, oh,

Lord, will there be anything left? And a good day, I'm starting to

dream about my portfolio. Like I'm actually thinking of that. I'm

going, wow. Oh, I'm like, five

X this thing

by the end of the month. Wow. Like, it happened one night, two

night,

three night, four night. Fifth night, I turned to my Michael

Babies. I'm getting sick. Something's wrong. This is

not good. That's

by the

way, what many things

that I did that you don't even know, but part of the reason I gave

that money, which was, there wasn't a tithe. That was many multiples of a tithe.

Because when you give, you're showing that

thing doesn't have a power over you. You're showing it doesn't have a hold

on you. When you give, you're showing, all right,

that is not my God. And now, Lord, you can trust me

with more, but it's not. Lord, you set the level of my

prosperity. That's by the way, in Proverbs, that

the Lord sets the level of your prosperity. But just note, He wants you to

prosper. But anyway, back to this. I knew

something was wrong because something

else, in this case, prophets captured my heart. And that's what

I was thinking about.

That's what I was danger. You say,

oh, I don't have that

problem. But maybe you're falling asleep thinking about

your problems. You're rehashing your problems. Listen, there's people

who are addicted to

anxiety. They're addicted to ruminating thoughts. Their thoughts,

they just go all over

the place, go all around the room, and then just come back to you.

Nothing is solved. But you're addicted in

that cycle. Break

that addiction in Jesus' name. What

excites you? What pushes your buttons?

What gets your

juices flowing? It's got

to be Jesus. And we're

going to receive communion really

soon. I'm not a prophet, but I'd say

probably in about a minute or two. Probably. My final point. If my spiritual

life

continues on its

current trajectory, where will I be in five years?

If my spiritual life continues in the

current trajectory, where will I be in five years?

You've all heard that saying. It's a

form of insanity to do

the same thing over and over again. And expect a different result. So if

this is the road, I'm

going down over five years. Where will I really be? Well, if

you want to change, engage

the Lord to help you change. By the way, I hope you... They're

going to start passing out communion.

Just hang on to the communion elements.

And we'll receive them all together. None

of this is supposed to be...

This isn't me going raw, raw. You

got to do more. You got

to psych yourself up. You

got to serve God with more

vigor. This is me saying drift happens. Only

the Lord can help. Run to

Jesus for help in keeping

your fire going. You can't do it on your own.

I can't do it on my own.

If this... If I had full control

of this

ship... I... I shudder to think, right? You

don't got to agree with me

so readily, Pastor Moe. You can like... Thank you, Jesus. Lord,

we thank you

for your saving

power and we thank you for your keeping

power. We thank you, Father, that you're the

one who keeps the flame burning. We thank you that you look after

us. You give us an empowerment from heaven

to say yes to God things and say no to evil things. To

make the right decisions, to cause

that flame to never go out, that we, like Paul, would be able

to say we've ran the race, we've finished the course, we're ready to

be poured out like an offering, a drink offering, unto

the Lord. That we die empty, empty of everything

that you've put in our hearts to do. I pray in Jesus' name for you,

for special grace to engage heaven this week, to engage the Lord, to be intimate

with him, to enjoy him. Hey, news flash, in Jesus' name, enjoy

your salvation. How about that? This is not supposed

to be burdensome.

Religion is awful, suck the life right

out of you. But salvation is meant to be enjoyed.

You have eternal life, you have the

living, all mighty God, over you, within you, around you. It

was for freedom that Christ has

set you free. Enjoy what He purchased with His own

blood. And we're about to receive communion, which

is partaking of Jesus. And as you partake of Jesus, believe

that you receive. Let me tell you how communion is

supposed to go down. It's not mysterious. You need things, examine

yourself. You need

stuff in your life. When

you partake a communion, use it

as a point of contact, and say, Lord, I trust you to

fix this in my life, because you're partaking of Jesus. Jesus has

already died, so that you

can have wholeness in every area of your life. He

didn't just die to see your

sins forgiven. He died to bring wholeness, blessing, peace

in every area. So if that is missing in some

area of your life, think of it right now. And say, Lord, as I partake of

Christ, I trust that you will fill that up. That you will meet that need. Can

you do that? So you take,

look, some people just

eat some moths and drink some grape juice. Others take

communion. Did you catch that?

What's the difference?

Faith? I don't want

to eat moths. I

don't like moths. It's dry. All

right. I don't like

welches. I

like ketim.

I don't want to

eat moths' injury

grape juice. I want to receive communion and activate

the supernatural power of God.

Go ahead and partake of the body

and blood of Jesus right now. Right now! I made the power of

God flood

your life! Supernatural miracles happening in your life! A

change while you're in here with

your eyes on Jesus receiving communion. He's out there in your place to

work. Right where the problems are. And he's

fixing and healing and blessing

in the name of Jesus. Hallelujah. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you, Lord.

Hallelujah.

And please remember

that when you're

walking

with the Lord, guilt, shame, condemnation is not a part.

It's not a portion for you. It's

not a part of your life.

Please note that. You can actually hear

a message that

challenges you, that exposes you, and not feel condemned

and shamed. That's the healthy responses. Wow, I still

know that God loves

me. I might be drifting. You might be

here fully backslidden. You

might be here unsaved. A friend

brought you in. You've never

given your life to Jesus.

You do what you want. You live

for yourself. You can be

convicted by the Holy

Spirit. You need a Savior. You need forgiveness.

But you don't have

to be ashamed,

condemned. Mm-hmm. Those who, the person who isn't

saved

when you come to Jesus, that'll lift before that you do have

that. But the Christian, no shame, no condemnation,

no guilt. I get zapped by the Lord all

the time. I don't then go crawling a corner

boohoo. I'm such a wretch. I still know

that you love me.

In your eyes, I'm still perfect. You

don't see one speck of sin

in me. You called me holy. You've put me

in the family of

God. But you're exposing somewhere I need work

in, an area that you want to touch.

And I yield to that, Lord. Amen.

Amen.