Reset: Break Free | Part 2

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Well, today we're in Reset, our series part two.

And here's what I know.

After the year we have just gone through, and for many, after perhaps just how this year has begun, we all need to hit the reset button in our life in some way.

For some, it's spiritually, isn't it?

Maybe you're drifting or feeling distant from God.

For others, it's relationally, and you're feeling uh maybe they're broken, or relationships are needing to be mended in some way, maybe in your marriage or with your kids or with a friendship.

Maybe it's directionally, and you've been wrestling on which way to go and and where am I at and what am I about?

Or perhaps it's personally, where after this year you feel overwhelmed and anxious and discouraged, and uh maybe the coping has turned into unhealthy habits that have followed you into 2021.

And the question for us is how in the world do you hit the reset button in your life?

That's what we're wrestling with in this series.

And in Colossians chapter three, the Apostle Paul tells us very specifically and practically how we hit the reset button in our life.

In fact, this series has the potential, if you will apply it, to be life-changing and transformative for your 2021.

Last week we said this.

We said this that reset is possible because in Christ you have a new starting point.

That it's actually possible.

It's not improbable.

This is something that can happen.

Uh, you don't start broken, you don't start doing better, you don't start somehow, you know, uh never gonna change.

You start in Christ.

What the apostle Paul said, raised.

You have a new identity and position in Christ.

You start in victory with him.

And then reset requires a rhythm of consistently setting your mind on things above.

You have spent a lifetime training your brain and taking in thoughts that are untrue, and you have to take responsibility for your thought life.

You have to change the playlist of your thought life and then bring it in alignment with God's word if we're gonna experience a reset in our life.

Now, after last week, for some, you might be wrestling with me and going, you're like, that's great, Ryan.

I love that I have a new starting point and things above.

Great, I've been trying to do that, or 21 days of prayer.

But what in the world do I do with all of my old habits and practices and patterns?

I know we stepped into 2021, but 2020 followed me into this year.

And the question is what do you do with all your old patterns of living, with all your old practices, with all your old behaviors, with all the things you long to see God change and transform in your life?

The apostle Paul is going to give us really specific and poignant instructions about what to do and how to address the old patterns of our life.

In a Colossians chapter 3, verse 5, we pick it up and he says this put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature.

Colossians 3:5

Wow, that's big time, right?

That's heavy.

That's a strong start.

Put to death.

Then he goes on sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires, greed, which is idolatry, because of these, the wrath of God is coming.

He goes on, he says, You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived.

This used to be just the normal way of your life, but now you must also rid yourself of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, filthy language from your lips.

Sounds like the apostle Paul is reading what's happening in our society today.

He says, Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed.

It's a process in the knowledge, in the image of its creator.

Here, there is neither no Gentile or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, sentient, slave or free, but Christ is all and is in all.

And so, and so, what do you do with all your old patterns of living?

Here's what the apostle Paul is saying in that section of scripture.

He's saying to hit the reset button in your life, if you really want to do it, what you have to do is do whatever is necessary to cut out destructive habits.

You have to do whatever is necessary.

That's what remember, he says, put to death.

He's like, do whatever is necessary for destructive habits, destructive behaviors, things that are pulling you down and destroying you and taking you out.

You know, the picture here, I think, uh, that best illustrates this is the picture of cancer.

Uh, when the apostle Paul is saying put to death, it's this, it's this cutting out and taking away something that is fundamentally uh broken and will kill you if you don't take it out.

You know, cancer is a growth that tends to proliferate in an uncontrollable way in your body.

Here's what we know cancer is not healthy, it is in opposition to your health.

Cancer, though it grows in your body, it's not a part of your body, it's an aberration, it's not a part of who you are.

And cancer left unchecked, undiagnosed, untreated is lethal.

And all of us, and some of you have walked through this.

If diagnosed with cancer, you will do whatever it takes to get it out of your body.

You will cut it out.

In fact, you'll do chemo, which is you will put poison in your body to kill it so that it will not kill you.

This is the picture that the apostle Paul is saying: do whatever is necessary to cut out destructive behaviors.

Now, when the apostle Paul begins to talk to us about life transformation, he follows a theological formula known as the indicative imperative.

Because this is so important, because if we don't understand this, we'll fall into legalism, somehow trying to do good to earn our way to God.

That is not the gospel.

And yet we are called, God loves you too much to leave you where you are at, to leave you in what you're doing.

He longs to transform you and take out the things that are destructive in you.

But we must understand the process of God.

It's the indicative and the imperative.

He follows this formula.

And so if you know this, uh in Romans chapter or in the book of Romans, Romans chapter 1 through 11, it's the indicative.

Romans 1 · chapter mention

It's what Christ has done for us.

It's what's true of you because you are now in Christ.

And then chapters 12 through 16, it's the imperative, how we are to live as a result of what Christ has done, what is true of you.

Ephesians, same thing.

Ephesians 1 through 3, it's the indicative.

It's all that is true of you, your identity in Christ.

And then chapters 4, 5, and 6, the imperative.

Out of your identity, out of this reality, you then start living this life.

And this is what Paul is doing in Colossians.

In fact, look at this right here.

He said, Started our last week.

Since then, you've been raised.

Your position, the indicative with Christ.

Set your hearts on things above, set your minds on things above, not on what?

Earthly things, your old life.

For why?

You died, it's dead.

Your life is now hidden with Christ.

You are now covered in Christ with God.

And so, out of that reality, that positional truth, put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature.

See, what the Apostle Paul's telling us, doing whatever's necessary, he's saying it's just learning to live out the life that's already true of you in Christ.

It's living out what is already true.

It's not trying to do something that, like, hey, I just gotta work towards this.

It's this is who you are.

And so as a result, this is how you are to live.

And so I love how NT Wright says it.

He says this if Christians have already died and risen again with Christ, whatever belongs to your earthly nature must be put to death.

And the question we're wrestling with, and the question that is so hard, and many of you have been stuck on is this how do I break the power of destructive habits in my life?

How do I break those?

How do I move forward instead of just stay stuck in this cycle?

In this text, the Apostle Paul gives us four specific steps to break the power of destructive habits in our life.

Four steps for us as we take these with him in cooperation with the Spirit of God, we experience life change and transformation and break the power of these habits and what's holding us in bondage.

Notice what he says first.

He says, step one is do a proper diagnosis.

You gotta do a proper diagnosis.

If you don't get a proper diagnosis, you'll never know exactly what's wrong, and you'll be addressing the wrong things.

You'll never get, well, you know, years ago, it's not that many years ago, but a couple years ago, uh, my son Miles and I and the rest of the kids, we're all riding bikes and we're going down this steep ravine and just having so much fun.

And he said, Dad, can I can I just go one more time?

And I mean, it just was like, Yeah, absolutely.

Now, as he was going down, there were other boys that were coming from a different direction, and it was in a tree line, so you couldn't quite see.

And so he's speeding down this hill, eight years of old age, and then all of a sudden I see another bigger boy coming in the opposite direction, speeding down, and I didn't know what to do.

And I wasn't sure, do I yell?

Maybe they'll miss each other.

Like if I yell, I'll scare them.

Well, he just clipped the back of that boy's bike, and I mean, as a dad, I just watched this and it feels like it was in slow motion.

He literally flipped twice in the air and he just slammed to the ground, and then it was silent, and that was scary.

I mean, I sprinted down to him, and then he finally came to thank God he was wearing a helmet, and I mean, he was in pain.

He was in such pain that I, I mean, just he's the toughest kid I ever known.

He was in so much pain.

And we I knew, like, I'm pretty sure he broke his collarbone and he where he's, and so we get him into the car.

I'm taking him to the hospital, to the ER, and you know, every bump is just so painful for him.

And and we get in line and we're standing in there, and he's holding it, and he's finally calmed down just a little bit, and maybe just the shock and the numbness is is taken in.

And and there's a guy in front of us, and he turns around, and Miles is crying, he's like, What's wrong with him?

Like, I think he broke his collarbone.

And and all of a sudden he acts like this expert.

He's like, Oh, well, can you do this?

Can you raise your arm?

And honestly, I this is not a good dad moment.

I should have said, Turn around, man, just leave my kid alone.

We're here.

And but I was like trying to be nice.

And so Miles is like, Yeah, I can do that.

He's like, Oh, he's fine.

He didn't break his collarbone.

Uh, he'll be fine.

Now, we could have just taken his word for it and walked out and just said, Well, you know, the guy in front of us, he seemed pretty knowledgeable, and uh he he coached, you know, kids, and I, you know, he probably knows.

He had him do a couple things, and so he didn't break his collarbone.

We didn't do that, and thankfully we didn't.

After we got the x-ray, this is what we saw.

And I don't know if you can see that on the screen as well, but this is his collarbone, and one bone's right here, and the other bone's up here, and there's a big old gap he snapped his collarbone into.

See, what we didn't need was some guy's diagnosis in line at the ER.

What we needed was a proper diagnosis from a doctor that can see the x-ray of what's really going on and say, no, this is broken.

This is broken, this is not good.

In fact, you need to hold it into place for a few weeks, six weeks to be exact and let it heal intact.

And here's the problem today, friends.

Listen, don't miss this.

Here's the problem.

We are settling for pop diagnosis from guys in lines in front of us instead of from the great physician, the author of life, who said, This is how I've designed life to be.

And so many people are walking around broken and fragmented and hurt and pain, and they don't understand why.

Because they haven't accepted the diagnosis of the good physician, not to hurt you, not to keep you from fun, but to heal you.

You see, notice what the apostle Paul said.

He said, put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature.

And then he begins to diagnose the brokenness of our earthly nature.

And did you notice that the apostle Paul he confronts or addresses all the things our culture condones or excuses?

Sexual immorality.

Sexual immorality is uh any type of activity sexually outside the bounds of marriage between one man and one woman for life.

Like Ryan, that's pretty constrictive.

I know it's God's design for our human sexuality.

It says impurity.

This is any activity of that that is morally impure or related to sexual sin.

Then it goes on to lust.

It's the desire to gratify uh your sexual activity in something that is not according to God's design or uh in a wrong way, in these passions, these uncontrolled desires to fulfill that uh in an illegitimate way, self-indulgent craving, and greed.

Greed, this is our culture, the consumer culture.

One writer said greed is the arrogant and ruthless assumption that all other persons and things exist for one's own benefit, and this defines our world.

This defines much of my world as well as your world, that we think things exist for us.

And he says, these things are creating death and brokenness and destruction.

And you're going, Ryan, you know what?

That's pretty old school.

We're progressive, we've moved on.

Here's what's interesting what we call progressive today is just actually regressive, it's as old as time.

Notice what theologian William Barclay said.

Uh, he said, chastity was the one completely new virtue which Christianity brought into the world.

Huh.

Interesting.

In the ancient world, sexual relationships before marriage and outside marriage were the normal and accepted practice.

Sexual, the sexual appetite was regarded as a thing to what?

Be gratified, not to be controlled.

Doesn't that sound like our culture?

Doesn't that sound like exactly what you've been told?

You can do whatever you want to do with whoever you want to do as long as it doesn't hurt anybody.

Well, I'm telling you, what God's word says is hurting someone and it's hurting you, and it's creating such pain and chaos and destruction.

And you're taking pop diagnosis from a guy in front of you, or the culture, or social media, or from politically correct whatever, instead of from the author of life.

It goes on.

But now you must also rid yourself of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, filthy language from your left, anger, a settled attitude of hostility, rage, a verbal outburst of anger, malice, a vicious disposition that results in the hurt of another, slander, an insult to cut another down, to speak ill of filthy language, obscene, poor taste, or dirty talk.

See, Christian speech must be kind and pure, honest to everyone and everywhere.

And you just take this one thing and you look at social media, and I don't care what other people are doing, what Christians are to do says none of this should be on the list.

None of this should be a reality for us.

And if and what he says is put it to death, kill it.

It's cancerous in our soul.

Step one, you have to do a proper diagnosis.

Who are you listening to?

Who is are you listening to to say this is true, this is right, this is good.

Chances are it's not God, the great uh physician, the author of life.

Then you have to embrace a new perspective.

See, you have a decision every time you get a diagnosis.

Did you know this?

Every time you get a diagnosis, you have a decision to am I going to take it for real?

Am I going to believe that?

You know, you go to a doctor and you say, hey, guess what?

If you continue this way of living, you're gonna get diabetes or you're you're gonna be in a serious unhealth and you can decide, hey, you know what?

I don't really care for that.

I'm gonna continue my way of living.

That's fine.

Now you know the direction and the path you're on.

See, if we're going to experience a reset, what we have to do is we have to have a proper diagnosis and then embrace a new perspective.

Here's the perspective sin is a cancer to be killed.

It's a cancer to be killed, not a mistake to be excused.

It's a cancer.

You're like it's small, it's not that big of a deal, it's internal.

Notice what he goes on to say, verse six because of these, the wrath of God is coming.

You used to walk in these ways in the way you once lived.

The in pursuit of that action, that habit, is death, is destruction.

We don't talk about the wrath of God very much anymore.

But the wrath of God is so misunderstood.

Let me give you a good definition.

The wrath of God is not, it's not the capricious anger of God.

It's not just God erupting in anger like some have had a coach or a parent do.

However, it is the moral order of the universe that uh one will ultimately reap what they have sown.

God designed this universe, and there is a moral order and way in which it works.

And either in this life or in the life to come, you will reap what you sow.

This is why the gospel is so powerful, is because Christ takes what we have reaped on the cross, that we might have life with Him.

What is the wrath of God?

It is God's righteousness and just response to that which undermines and corrupts what is good and lovely and morally excellent.

See, that's the outcome.

It's reaping what you sow.

In fact, Dr.

Tony Evans uh in a post responding to the events of January 6th of the siege of the Capitol, he posted this Today's political violence was a tragic illustration of what happens to a nation when it abandons God's person, principles, and policies.

America is undergoing the passive wrath of God, meaning you are being allowed to experience the consequences of your decisions.

That's the passive wrath of God, which takes place when his standards are compromised.

The result is chaos, conflict, and lawlessness.

Only a radical return to God by his people will change this.

The answer to saving America is not the White House, it is the church house.

Amen, Dr.

Evans.

See, here's the picture I want you to get: a good diagnosis, and then you have to embrace a new perspective.

See, it may feel good in the moment, but it'll ultimately cause great harm in the future.

You know, when I was um first married, we had a uh we had our first child, and as Jenny began to um, you know, grow with child, I grew with her.

I grew empathy weight.

In fact, uh, I grew as much as uh 40 pounds overweight, and it's like, wow, it's a crazy amount of weight on this body.

In fact, I got up to 195.

You don't need to know this, but um uh for whatever.

And I was like, you know what?

I'm just gonna get to 200 because I may never get there again.

It just became a competition.

I made it all the way to 205.

And I gotta tell you, there was a lot of work to get back into health.

Now, in youth ministry, we had so much candy and sweets, and one of my uh things that I love is donuts.

Uh, growing up, I love donuts, apple fritters.

Oh, they're awesome.

They're my favorite.

And I realized that I may like donuts, but I do not like what donuts do to me.

And so I started saying this.

In fact, I do this now automatically.

Somebody offered me donuts.

No, I don't really like donuts.

But that's not true.

Donuts are delicious, they're awesome.

Come on now.

Sugary fried dough with a little apple in it.

But I've learned to not like donuts because I do not like what donuts do to me.

I do not like what their effect is.

See, I think for sometimes when we think about sin, we're like, I should hate this, I should not like this.

Well, let's be honest.

The things that the apostle Paul just described, they either feel good in the moment, when you rip someone anew, that feels good.

When you lash out on social media, you're like, oh, that felt so good.

I spoke my truth.

When you gratify your sexual cravings, that feels so good in the moments.

But it ultimately creates long-term harm.

See, what we have to learn to hate is not just sin.

We got to learn to hate the effects of sin.

Hate the effects like, man, yeah, I don't like donuts, which means I don't like what they do to me.

I don't like anger because I don't like what anger does to me.

I don't like lust because I don't like what lust does to me.

I don't like the effects of it in my life.

It's a new perspective how you understand sin as a cancer.

I don't like what it's doing to me.

A proper diagnosis, embrace a new perspective.

Then he goes on and says, you got to clean house.

You got a clean house.

This is a crucial step, friends.

You gotta clean house, not just tidy up.

You know, when you have people you have company over, what do you do?

You tidy up.

When you tidy up, what do you do?

You take all the stuff that's been around and you either throw it into a closet, or in our case, we'll I'm sorry, Jenny, um, we'll throw it into our room and close the door.

And it's hidden.

It's not clean, it's hidden.

See, if you want to experience life change, if you want to cut out the necessary destructive habits, you have to clean house, you have to do a deep cleaning, not just a tidying up.

This is why he says, but now rid yourself of all such things.

Get rid of it.

I like how N.

T.

Wright says it.

He says this to put something to death, you must cut off its lines of supply.

See, so many want to experience this change, but they don't clean house.

They do a little bit here, but because you like it a little bit, you keep just a little bit hidden in the closet.

You don't get it fully out of the house.

You see, if if you're an alcoholic, you take all the alcohol out of the house.

You don't buy anymore.

And then you don't work at a bar.

If you struggle with lust, you make sure that there's no access to anything that will allow you to go on and see things you should not see in your house on your phone.

And then you decide, I will not watch rated R movies.

Like, well, that eliminates a lot of movies.

I get it.

There's often a lot of other things on there that is not good for that, that spark things.

You got to clean house.

Maybe you're flirting with an affair right now.

Is that work?

You know, it could have been a person that you met at the gym before things shut down.

You got a clean house, you gotta break it off.

And for some, let me be really clear because your marriage is in jeopardy, your future is in jeopardy.

You need to either change your department at your work, you need to maybe even change jobs.

See, this is how serious it is.

Put it to death, get rid of it, or it will put you to death.

For some, you just need to delete social media.

If you got nothing good to say, don't say it at all.

You can't follow that, you just can't help, and you get consumed and you just keep lashing out.

To put something to death, you must cut off its lines of supply.

So let's go back to that donut illustration.

To get healthy, to get healthy for me, I have a massive sweet tooth over Christmas.

Oh my goodness, I just love sweets.

I can't keep any sweets in the house.

If it is, I'll find it, I'll eat it, it'll be gone, it won't be good.

You have to get it out.

Let me ask you.

What is in your life you need to get out of the house?

And for some, it's literally.

Maybe you need to break up with him or her, break off that conversation.

What do you need to stop?

To say, I am putting to death.

That is a decisive act.

I'm done with this.

You see, the steps for you to experience freedom to break free from destructive habits.

It's a proper diagnosis, it's a new perspective.

You got to clean house.

And then finally, step four, come clean in community.

You gotta come clean.

You gotta get everything out in the open.

You gotta be honest, you gotta be real.

Nothing good grows in the dark.

When you keep a secret, when you keep it hidden in the back closet, when you just tidy up, but it's there and nobody sees it, it keeps you captive and it will kill you.

This is why the apostle Paul says, Do not lie to each other.

Don't lie.

Uh, the other day, I the other day is a little bit ago, happened to have a conversation with an older gentleman and his wife, and he was sharing, they were sharing their story.

His is a story where he was wildly successful as an investor, well known.

And his deepest, darkest secret was exposed publicly.

He got caught in a prostitution sting by the police.

And all of a sudden, in a matter of minutes, what he had kept secret for years and years, decades of his marriage, now was going to be plastered on the late on the nightly news.

And so he had to tell everyone.

And in that moment, he had a come to Jesus reality, acknowledged him, and he heard this word from God.

It was his word to him.

He said, From this day forward, never lie.

Never lie.

Man, lies keep you stuck and hidden and broken.

It is the work of the enemy.

In fact, it's Satan's native tongue.

He says, Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off the old self.

It's the picture of baptism of walking into the waters, coming out with this practice and put on the new self, coming out of the waters of baptism, that you are now this brand new reality.

Don't do this any longer, which is being renewed.

It's a process.

That's the word of hope I want to give.

And we're going to talk about putting on the new self next week and the renewing action that we talked about last week.

This is a process, and it takes some time in the knowledge of the image of its creator.

Here, there's neither Jew or Gentile, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, sentient, slave, free, but Christ is all and is in all.

What do you need to come clean with?

What are the things that if you you're afraid if somebody found out you would be like, oh my gosh.

I mean, can you hand over your phone unlocked to somebody and just say, go for it?

I mean, this probably holds the most personal, intimate, private content that we have.

You know, in today's language, we say keep it 100, like always.

And that doesn't mean just speak your truth.

That means be completely transparent.

The word intimacy is into me see.

Like we allow people to see into us.

And he says it's in community, it's in relationship.

You notice that.

It's, he says, here, a new kind of community, the family of God.

And it's not broken down into our social classes, in our into our political areas.

Gentiles, literally Greeks.

Greeks were the aristocrats, there's the educated.

They were so proud of their education and and knowledge.

Jews, they were they were the religious elite.

They they thought everybody was wrong.

Circumcised, uncircumcised, it had to do with your religious following, dogmatic of the law.

Barbarian, these were the lowest of low people.

And by the way, Cyntian were the worst of the barbarians.

Amazing that it says here in the family of Christ, here, none of that matters.

Republican, Democrat, it doesn't matter.

What matters is Jesus.

But Christ is all and is in all.

What we have in common is now we all have been raised with Christ, are in a new family and walking and journeying together.

And you're going, you are a Christ follower first.

That's the most important thing about you.

That's the most important thing about me.

And we come clean in community.

God uses the community of uh in the family of God to come around us to bring healing and wholeness and help and strength for us to walk this life.

You know, it was a little while ago, a friend of mine, his deepest, darkest secret came out.

It was something he'd been hiding and lying for over a year.

He'd lied to my face multiple times, in fact.

And it finally all came out, had major, major consequences with his family, with his work, some things uncertain.

And there was a handful of us that came around him and his wife, and we prayed for them.

And then I just was driving with him.

We're going back to his house, and he just was like, I just need time with you.

And I remember sitting, I just kind of leaned back and I said, So how's it feel?

He's like, What do you mean?

I said, How's it feel to have your deepest, darkest secret, the worst thing you've ever done in your entire life, come to light and realize no one ran away, but they came around you.

See, I think the thing that keeps us from coming clean in communities, we're afraid of what people think, we're afraid of how people respond, we're afraid they'll reject us.

And if we actually came clean, people wouldn't want to be around us.

News flash: we all are broken, we all need the grace of Jesus, and we're all journeying together.

Come clean.

And in the family of Christ, where there's none of this, it's just Jesus.

You find healing and wholeness as you do.

Reset means doing whatever is necessary.

You gotta cut it out as cancerous for those destructive habits.

For you, would you take the next step?

A proper diagnosis, a new perspective, a cleaning house.

For some, you need to do some clean house, and for some, you need to have probably most, you need to have some honest conversations.

And the first honest conversation will be hard and yet it'll be freeing.

Here's what my friend told me later.

We're sitting around a fire talking about that moment later.

You know what he said?

What is more exhausting than coming clean is hiding.

What's more exhausting than coming clean is hiding.

Would you come out of hiding?

God wants to bring healing and bring freedom.

Heavenly Father, I ask that in this moment you would give those that are listening the courage to do what you are calling them to do.

You've been working on their hearts, and there's been some things that you've brought up, and it feels uh scary, and it feels like, oh, I'm gonna be exposed.

And it feels like, okay, God, if I do this, what's gonna happen?

And is all the fun gonna happen, be taken away?

What do I do?

May they have the confidence and know you're the great physician who loves and wants the very best, wants to not bring death but life.

Would they lean into you and take the next right step?

In Jesus' name.

Amen.