Bad Advice: Just Love Me | Part 4

Welcome to the Awakening Church podcast.

We pray this message encourages you and provides the hope and light of Jesus Christ.

Thanks for tuning in.

Well, we're in a series called Bad Advice.

It's a series, not it's a relationship series, not like a dating series or a married series.

It's about all relationships because we have this deep relational desire.

It's intrinsic to every single person.

It's part of your design by God.

And this desire is simply this to have a life-giving, intimate, character-shaping relationship that has this rugged commitment to one another.

That's what we want, that's what we long for.

That's what we're pursuing.

We've been asking this question how in the world do you have or experience those kinds of relationships?

And we've been covering really what is bad advice.

Things or ideas that we accept that are actually undermining the very flourishing of our relationships, that are undermining the life-giving, intimate, character-shaping longing that we have.

And we looked at, you know, live your truth.

You deserve happiness.

You know, um, you're missing out.

Uh today we're looking at um this one, just love me.

Would you go ahead and turn to the person next to you and just say, just love me?

That was awkward.

That was weird.

You're like, I I I sat in the wrong place today, Ryan.

And others of you like, I've been wanting to say that forever.

I just this was amazing.

Just love me.

54 days after our wedding, 48 days after our honeymoon from hell, Jenny and I celebrated our very first Valentine's Day together.

Now, we dated long distance, whether it's from Chicago to San Luis Obispo or Chicago to um Sweden.

And so we were never in the same place for Valentine's Day.

So our very first Valentine's Day was the beginning of our marriage together.

And we're living in downtown Chicago, and I wanted it to be perfect.

And so I had this plan.

I picked Jenny up from work.

We came back to our apartments on the seventh floor, right downtown, and we get up there, and I had, you know, candles lit on our IKEA table right there, and I had flowers, and we had chocolate, and I had uh the new Nora Jones album, you know, come away with me.

Yeah, I was a baller.

I yeah, it was good.

And like everything was starting out amazing.

This was so good.

And so I'm gonna take her out on a romantic dinner that night.

And so she gets dressed up.

I get dressed up, and we go down the elevator and we walk uh over to Rush Street.

And if you've been to Chicago, you know Rush Street is this um incredible street with all these wonderful, fancy restaurants and walking downtown, and there's lines outside of all of them.

I can only imagine what Jenny's thinking, looking at which one is it, you know?

And I remember this distinctly as we were passing on on the other side, we see Norm from Cheers.

Anybody remember Norm?

Uh yeah, he's waiting outside to get into one of these restaurants, right?

And I'm like, what's up, Norm?

Uh, and we so we keep going and we stop right on this corner of Rush, and and I'm like, we're here.

And she says, We're here where?

Well, where we're gonna eat, and she looks up, and it's Johnny Rockets.

And and I can tell by her eyes and look, I wasn't, you know, too far into the marriage so far, but a keen awareness of you know, intuitive knowing exactly where she was at, that this was a miss.

You know, I see her eyes drop, and I go, you know what, we can go somewhere else.

The reality is we couldn't, like Taco Bell at this point, honestly, on a uh in Valentine's Day, and she's like, No, it's fine.

It wasn't fine.

We walk into the Johnny Rockets, and there's only one other table.

It's a uh grandparents with grandkids, and then there's us coming into it, and the gal who was our waitress happened to go to my school, and I see her, she says hi, and she's like, literally says this.

Oh, I didn't think anyone would actually take us up on the Valentine's Day special.

Thank you very much.

Just shut up and show us our table.

That's what I wanted to say.

I didn't say that.

And so, you know, we we go to our table and we order um, you know, a burger and chili cheese fries.

One, you need to know a couple things.

One, my wife loves chili cheese fries.

So I'm like, they have wonderful chili cheese fries.

The other thing is my wife really loved at that time 50s style, 50s genre, all things 50s.

We grew up in Santa Cruz, we didn't have a Johnny Rockets.

I'm like, this is amazing.

This place is all about the 50s.

And so here I in my mind I'm thinking this not only fits within our budget, but it fits like her like 50s and all this sort of things, and it'll be really special.

I was right about it fitting in our budget.

Um, that was about it, you know.

So we sit there and we're having a conversation, and it it just started to feel inside, just about as cold as it felt outside in the Chicago winter, and it got quieter and quieter.

And eventually Jenny just says, Can we um can we just go home?

And so then I say this because uh I'm just really mature and connected.

Say, well, at least can we get a milkshake?

Because if I'm gonna have a bad night, I want to have a milkshake and kind of make up for this bad night.

Well, we went home milkshakeless, facing opposite directions as we fell asleep, and that was our very first Valentine's Day together.

Now, now the one good thing about it was I set the bar so low for every future Valentine's Day.

You know, we live in a culture obsessed with love, don't we?

We have a day, Valentine's Day, where we celebrate love, TV, movies, songs.

It's all about love.

And we say things like this just love me.

Don't change me.

Like, wouldn't the world be a better place if we just love one another?

Love's the most powerful force on the planet.

You know, love, we don't say this anymore, but it's kind of what we think, makes the world go round.

And we have this idea and this infatuation with love, and we're constantly falling in and out of it.

I'm falling in in love, I'm falling out of love, and we're looking for love, and we're hoping for it, longing for it.

And built into the modern uh idea of love is this promise, and it's what we're pursuing, what we're looking for, what we're kind of actually running after.

And it goes something like this when I fall in love, then everything will fall into place, right?

When I fall in love, when I find Mr.

Perfect, when I find Miss Right, then everything will fall into place.

Said another way, when I find the right person, then everything will work out right.

And so we have this kind of formula find the right person, fall in love, live happily ever after.

And we're on the search, and it maybe if you've been watching The Bachelor, I saw an episode this last week.

It's a confession moment.

I'm sorry, I just had to get that off my chest, and it's all talking talking about what?

Finding my person.

I'm constantly finding my person.

That's how we talk about it.

It's my person, like as if you're a possessive thing that's mine, my person.

I gotta find the right person, fall in love, and then we'll live happily ever after.

But here's the question what happens when you don't live happily ever after?

When things don't work out right.

Well, we re-reo we reverse or re-engineer the love promise, right?

If everything doesn't work out right, then I must have married the wrong person.

And so then we go looking for our person over and over again.

You know, I think one of the questions we have to wrestle with, if love really is the most powerful force on the planet, why isn't it more resilient?

Why isn't it more sturdy?

I mean, why do we fall in and out of it?

Do you ever think about that?

Like we talk about falling in love, and I was just thinking about this.

Like I can't think of any other thing that we talk about falling in a positive way.

Right?

When we talk about someone who got uh hoodwinked or, you know, they they got deceived.

I mean, they fell for it.

Someone fell off the wagon, and then we fall in love.

If love's so powerful, why isn't it more resilient?

Why do we fall in and out of love so much?

Why is it so fickle?

See, I'd like to suggest the problem actually isn't love, and we were gonna talk about love.

The problem is actually how we define love and how we use the word love.

You know, part fundamental to the human condition for you and for me is a deep, God-given design to not only be love, but to give love.

And so if we don't define love really well, we're gonna end up at destinations we never desired and down past we never dreamed because we've not defined love well.

Here's what's fascinating when we're talking about our definition of love.

Miriam Webster, this is how, you know, the preeminent one who defines all things for us today defines love.

It defines it as a noun, defines it as a force, defines it as a thing.

Love is a feeling of strong or constant affection for a person or attraction that includes sexual desires, the strong affection felt by people who have a romantic relationship, a person you have, uh, the person you love in a romantic way.

It's this force.

And maybe you've experienced it.

Like you saw him or her across the quad or across the office or at the gym, and all of a sudden you couldn't get them off your mind, and it's just like your heart went pitter patter.

Only animals' feet go pitter patter, and something about Santa Claus and the rooftop, uh, and then our hearts go pitter patter.

You're like, what?

Like, I don't understand that part.

But your heart all of a sudden begins to beat faster, and you have this like, oh my gosh, I'm in love, and it happened to me, and I can't do anything about it.

It just takes you over.

It's this force, it's this thing.

It comes and it goes.

And then the way we use the word love, think about this.

We use the word love for everything.

At least I do.

I happen to love the Dallas Cowboys.

I know some of you don't love that.

I love the Dallas Cowboys, but I love the Dallas Cowboys, and yes, I'm used to disappointment.

Um, I also love tacos.

Praise the shepherd, above the Dallas Cowboys.

And I love my kids.

And I use the same word for all of those, and tacos and kids are really close, but kids edged out.

And here's the interesting part is you know, I mean something radically different by those, and yet we use the same word for all of them, and as a result, it loses its force, doesn't it?

It loses its punch, it loses its power, its significance.

You know, um, one of the incredible things about when the New Testament was written is uh the it was written in Koine Greek.

It was the trade language at the time, and so most people would know at least two languages in that day.

They would know their own kind of local dialect, like Jesus and his disciples would speak Aramaic, and they would know Koine Greek, this is the trade language, and so the New Testament's written in Greek, and Greek uh the Greek language has multiple words for love, which is wonderful.

They don't just assign one word, it has multiple words, and there's four primary words for love.

And what I want to do with our time is talk about how do we experience a love that's resilient?

How do you have a love that can withstand the storms of life?

And so, first, let's begin to define love really well.

Well, let's look at those four loves that we find in Greek.

The first love is the Greek word storge, and some of you might be familiar with these four loves because of a Super Bowl ad two years ago.

Storge is familial love, a natural or instinctual affection.

It's the love of a parent for a kid or siblings for one another.

And as we look at these loves, the one thing that I want you to think about is what is the foundational uh love that you have uh that you're building your life upon?

See, many parents, we can build our foundational love on our kids.

And it feels good in that moment, it's wonderful.

And yet, what we've seen over and over is marriages fall apart after the kids leave the house.

Why?

Because the foundation of their love was the kids.

And they looked at one another and they didn't have anything in common.

Storgay love, this familiar love.

The second one is eros.

It's this physical or sexual love, a deep feeling of attraction and sexual desire.

This is often what we mean when we're talking about falling in love and all of this in our culture today.

We mean eros.

It's this idea of passion and desire.

It's really good, it's wonderful.

God created it, He's not down on it at all.

And yet the problem and the challenge is this if this is the foundation of your love, at some point, at some point the feelings or the passion fades and comes in and out, and as soon as the attraction is lost, love is gone.

Isn't it true that you know the passion or the desire or maybe even lust got you into that relation, got you into his or her bed, and then we blame, we blame love to get us out of it.

I well, I just fell out of love.

Storge, eros, then phileo, friendship or companionship love, a close association or affection.

It's wonderful.

In many ways, we're losing our phileo and our culture and our DNA.

It's a longing, it's a desire.

And yet, if it becomes the foundation, it can often build a codependency on one another.

Now, the New Testament writers, and Paul in particular, he actually took a Greek word, and many of you already know this Greek word, and he began to use it exclusively and define it particularly for a type of love in the way that God loved us and how we are to love one another.

And that's the Greek word.

Help me out.

Agape.

Yeah, you know this.

Agape love.

Agape love is this unconditional, sacrificial love.

It's a love marked by giving and not getting.

Now, as we talk about unconditional, when we think of unconditional our day, we're talking about just love me, don't change me.

Right?

Don't change me, just love me, accept me for me.

Now, every good parent has unconditional love for their kids, right?

They love their kids.

It's their unconditional love.

It doesn't mean that they think, well, I'm just gonna accept you for you and not want you to grow and get better, right?

I can have unconditional for my love and not accept the tantrum that's happening in front of me.

Why?

Because out of love, you know that if they are always doing that, they will not uh, you know, grow up and live a good life, right?

See, unconditional love actually loves you, meets you right where you're at, accepts you right where you're at, loves you, but wants the very best for you, and so longs to help you grow and become the person you were designed to be.

It doesn't leave you where you're at.

Now, the greatest definition we have for love comes out of 1 Corinthians chapter 13.

1 Corinthians 13 · chapter mention

We know it as the love passage or the love um chapter in the Bible.

And the problem with the love chapter is that we hear it so often at weddings, it loses our punch and it gets too like, you know, um mushy, I guess.

And many of you have been at probably a hundred weddings since COVID happened and like this last year, people get gathered.

So you've probably heard this so many times.

I want you to listen to it afresh.

This is this is how God views love.

He's saying, this is the foundation.

If we want to be a people of love, if you want to love that withstands the storms of life, this is the type of love that you build a foundation that all those other loves are built upon, that all those other loves flourish in.

Notice how the apostle Paul begins.

He begins with two things about what love is.

He only gives us two, by the way.

This is what love is.

He tells us a lot of things that love is not, or that love doesn't do, but only two of what it is.

Love is patient, and love is kind.

That word patient, it means to bear up under provocation without complaint, to be even tempered, even in trying to circumstances.

This is what love is.

This is what love does.

This long-suffering, and then it's kind.

There's a mercifulness, there's a kindness, there's a gentleness, there's a considerateness.

It's like if you want to know what love is, it has this patience, and then it has this kindness to it.

And if you want to know what love doesn't do, let me tell you.

Oh, it doesn't envy, it doesn't look at what others have and be upset that they have it or wish that you had it.

It's not jealous, it doesn't boast, it doesn't have to heap praise on yourself, make much of yourself.

It's not proud, it's not inflated with one's own importance where I have to be the center.

It doesn't dishonor others.

There's no shame in love's game.

It doesn't disrespect others.

I mean, just think about what would change in the way we post and the way we talk about even those we disagree with if we said we're not gonna dishonor you.

Remember, Jesus said, Love our enemies and pray for those who persecute you.

So even the people that you disagree with fundamentally says, I'm not gonna dishonor you.

Like, imagine what a world we'd be in if we just lived that out.

I'm not gonna dishonor you.

I'm not gonna shame you.

It's not self-seeking, it doesn't insist on their own way, it doesn't make sure it gets what it wants.

It's not self-absorbed, it's not easily angered, it's not easily irritated, it's not easily provoked, it keeps no records of wrong, it doesn't keep score, it doesn't hold over your head things you've done in the past.

There's no resentment or bitterness.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

Love does not delight in injustice, love does not delight in wrongdoing, love speaks up for the voiceless, love speaks up for those that are being wronged, it speaks up for that's what is true and good and godly.

It always protects, always trusts.

Protecting to be safe and consistent, trust, it believes the best, gives the most generous explanation, it always hopes, longs for the very best, and always persevere, it never gives up.

Endures through the heart.

I want you to circle that word always.

When we think about love, and in particular when we're thinking about relationships, much of the way we love is contractual.

A contract that says, if I do this, then you need to do that.

And if you don't hold up your end of the bargain, then I'm out as well.

I talk about this when I do weddings all the time, is that a lot of times we think about it, even a wedding, is like a phone contract, right?

And you have this phone contract and you got into the phone contract.

Why?

Because it sounded really great and they had good deals, but you didn't see all the secret hidden fees.

And then you're looking for ways to get out of the contract.

And then finally, another contract, another phone dealer will say, Hey, I'll pay for you to get out of it to come to us.

And so you do.

And that's kind of what we do in relationships.

When you don't hold up your con into the contract, well, I'm out.

I'm done.

It says love always.

That's not contractual, it's covenantal.

That there's this way upon which that you have been loved by the God of the universe, that then you choose to love the other regardless of how you feel about it, that you have this covenant commitment.

It's not a contractual tit for tat thing.

It's just I'm gonna love you regardless, always, all the time.

Now, when I read this list, it's really convicting.

See, what happens is when we begin to look at this, it becomes a mirror into our soul, doesn't it?

See, because if I'm really honest, if I'm gonna just let's let's be a hundred for a second, because if we don't, um, we're not gonna grow and we're not gonna uh see what God has for us.

So when I read this list, love is patience.

Ouch.

Even tempered, even in trying circumstances, I've been struggling with my patience lately.

And because I've been struggling with my patience, then it bleeds into my kindness.

Anyone else feel me?

Yeah?

It bleeds into my kindness, and so my patience is being frayed, and it bleeds into my kindness, and so there isn't a gentleness about me.

And then it goes on to say it's not easily angered.

Well, if I'm not patient, then what am I?

I'm easily angered.

In fact, Jenny and I were talking about this last night.

More Jenny talking to me, and hello, it's true.

She's like, you just seem to have a short fuse lately.

And then keeps no records of wrong.

And I count myself in the fall, keeping a record of wrong as we're meeting with our therapist.

I already told you this, but I'll tell it again just so somebody who missed it, and I just started write down records so that we could address it.

See, when we look at this, friends, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on.

We can't go, this is nice, an idea.

We have to allow it to begin to examine our hearts.

That's what God's word does when we allow it to examine our heart and be able to reveal in us what is really there.

Only then will you begin to experience the power of his word.

And so we begin to look at this and go, okay, God, where are you working and where do you need to work?

Where are you working?

Because you're doing some good in me, and where do you need to work?

See, what love is for us, friends, is love is not a noun, it's not a force, it's not a thing.

The love to build your life on is a verb, right?

It's is, it does.

This is just how love behaves.

This is just what love does.

And love is not just a verb, it's a choice.

It's a choice to be loving even though you don't feel loving.

See, love is not devoid of feelings, it's just not defined by feelings.

And we're waiting to be loving because we want to until we feel like it, until we want to, and we and it's it's not devoid of feelings, it's that you're gonna have feelings, it's just that feelings doesn't get to sit in the driver's seat.

I'm gonna choose to love you regardless of how I feel in the moment.

And notice this: love is not a doormat or a dictator.

Love doesn't just simply allow itself to get walked over or s or settle for abuse.

No.

Love, listen, listen, listen, love pursues what's right and just and protects the vulnerable, but it's not a dictator manipulating others to get their way, demanding their rights, insisting, no, it's patient, it's kind.

And let's be honest.

Don't we all want a friend like that?

Don't you want to, if you're single and you you want to have a boyfriend or girlfriend, don't you want a boyfriend or girlfriend like that?

Don't you want a spouse like that?

Don't we want to be like that?

See, the modern love promise says when I fall in love, everything will fall into place.

Relational wisdom says this.

Listen, listen, listen.

It's less about falling in love, it's more about growing in love.

It's less about something just happening to you.

And I don't want to discount that.

That's awesome.

God made us that way.

That's wonderful.

But it will not sustain you for a lifetime, and it will not be the foundation upon which you can build a healthy relationship in any sphere.

It's more about growing in love.

And so I just want to spend the remainder of our time talking about how in the world do we grow in love?

How do we increase our love quotient?

As we read that list, how do we begin to go, okay, God, I want, I want you to grow me in my patience and in my kindness.

And oh man, that that that just short fuse, God, I long for you to do a work in me.

How do we grow in that?

If you flip over a few more pages to uh the book of Ephesians, the Apostle Paul is yet again talking on love, and he writes this, Ephesians chapter 5, verse 1 and 2.

Ephesians 5:1

Be imitators of God.

How?

Therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love.

Be an imitator of God the same way little kids imitate their parents.

Uh, I have uh three kids, one of them looks just like me.

His name's Ryder, he's the middle, I mean, his hair looks just like me, his mannerisms are just like me.

I didn't teach him any of those things.

It's just that he's my kid.

I mean, even the same way he puts his feet like this and hands like this to watch the TV, it looks like a mini-me.

Because he's my kid.

God's saying, be an imitator because you're his kid.

Be an imitator of God, how as dearly loved children live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice.

How do we grow in love?

Let me give you three keys from the text.

First, embrace that you are dearly loved.

Embrace that you are dearly loved.

This is your identity.

The Apostle Paul uses a cognate of agape here.

It's agapetos, and here's what agapetos means.

It's the object of one's affection, having a very special relationship, beloved.

Like the starting point for us to become more loving isn't somehow to conjure up more love.

This week I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna get it.

It's to understand how loved we are, it's to understand your identity.

You are beloved.

Like the God of the universe looks down on you with delight, and he loves you, and nothing you can do can make him love you anymore, and nothing you can do can make him love you any less.

He loves you, he is so wild for you, he delights in you.

You are his beloved, it's your identity, and your identity is received, it's not achieved, you can't earn it.

See, that's the most important thing about you, by the way.

Remember, the human condition is to love and to be loved, and we're constantly searching for that to be loved.

And the most important thing about you is that you are profoundly, unconditionally loved by the God of the universe who looks down on you and says, I love you.

See, God loves you.

Think about this, and precisely because God loves you, there's something in you that's worthy of love.

And some of you need to hear that because you don't feel worthy or valuable, and you are so worthy and valuable to the God of the universe.

Starting point, embrace that you're dearly loved.

You know, today the starting point is often this, right?

It's um I gotta love me first before I can love you.

I gotta love me first.

I gotta love me first.

In fact, I've heard it said this way um, I love you, but I love me more, right?

And and I understand part of a healthy care of self, so I'm not talking about this, but there is this kind of love of self, like somehow I gotta conjure up more love.

And the and the illustration that people use is like you know, when you're flying, and some of you haven't flown in a couple years, so let me remind you is the mask, right?

It's like, hey, you gotta take care of you first, and so you pull down on the mask and you take care of you first, and then you help someone else.

See, I gotta love me first.

Here's the problem with that illustration.

Where is the mask plugged into?

Is it plugged into you?

See, what we're thinking of is I gotta love me, is somehow that mask is then plugged into me, and I gotta somehow fill myself up more of me.

And that ain't gonna work.

The reality is, is there is an oxygen tank that is connected that when you pull it down, you are connected to a source that's outside of yourself that is breathing you life, and so that then you can give life, right?

And this is precisely the point that you would reach up, not and somehow conjure up love, but realize realize the source of life loves you, and you receive his oxygen and his grace in your life to then give it to those around you.

Embrace that you're dearly loved, secondly, then commit to living a life of love.

There's two commands in the text.

One, be an imitator, second, live a life of love.

Make a choice.

Remember, love is a choice.

Make a commitment, take a practical step.

My starting point.

I'm dearly loved.

Out of that reality, I'm gonna choose to love you.

Not because you deserve it, not because you earned it, not even because I'm feeling particularly loving towards you, but I have been so well loved, I commit to loving you.

I choose to love you.

So let me ask you this.

Who specifically do you need to choose to agape in your life today?

Who do you need to choose to agape this week?

Maybe it's a coworker.

Maybe it's your boss.

Maybe it's a friend.

Maybe it's a parent.

Maybe it's one of your grown kids.

Maybe it's your spouse.

Maybe it's your ex.

Live a life of love.

Why?

Because you are already so profoundly loved.

You're not looking for someone else to fill you up, you're not looking for someone else to complete you, you're not looking for somehow to get from them.

You already have the fullness of love of the infinite God of the universe.

So you have infinite resource of infinite love poured out towards you, and so then you can love infinitely those around you because his love is in you.

And I go, I'm gonna make a commitment.

And then finally, we rely on Christ's love to empower us.

Because you're like, Ryan, how do I do that?

How do I live this life of love?

That sounds really hard.

You're reading 1 Corinthians 13.

That sounds impossible right now.

The apostle Paul uses another cognate of the Greek word agape, it's agapau.

And and this word, I love how Ephraim Smith defined it.

He says, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering, that just as Christ loved us, agapau, the unconditional love of Jesus in us that's flowing through us to be a force of transformation around us.

The unconditional love of Jesus in us that's flowing through us to be a force of transformation around us.

Here's how this works.

You wake up tomorrow and you remind yourself I am dearly loved.

Right now, and I don't know what I did, I don't know, I know what I did.

I don't know what you did, where you've been.

Nothing changes his love for you.

So I'm gonna commit today to love those along my path.

And you know specifically what that looks like.

And regardless of how you feel, regardless of how you want in that moment, I'm gonna take a step.

And what we do is we wait until we feel like it, and we're wondering, God, would you empower me to love that person?

And he's like, Yeah, I will.

Take the step.

And what we do is, God, will you empower me?

No, no, no.

Take the step, and as you take the step, the Holy Spirit will empower you in that moment.

And so many of us are missing out on the empowerment of God because we're sitting back.

Show me, show me, show me.

And he's going, No, take a step.

I've already told you, I'll be with you, I'll never leave you.

I've put my spirit inside of you.

As you take that step in love, I'll give you the power to love in that moment.

How do we grow in love if it's less about falling in love?

Embrace that you're dearly loved, commit to living a life of love, and then rely on Christ's love to empower you.

Take that step.

And so here's simply what love asked.

Would you ask it this week?

What's the highest and best for the other person?

Maybe said another way, you can take the out of it.

What's God's highest and best for the other person?

For your friend.

It might actually be speaking the truth in love, won't you?

It might just be a listening ear.

And that dating relationship.

What's the highest and best?

What's God's highest and best?

So that you can look at each other and know that you're pushing them towards Jesus, not pulling them away from Jesus.

What's the highest and best in your marriage with your kids?

With your coworkers.

I like how Andy Stanley asks it.

He asks it this way.

He says, What does love require of me?

In this moment.

Like, okay, God, this you have loved me.

What does love require of me?

And here's the incredible and beautiful reality.

Flip back to 1 Corinthians 13.

These aren't words of a God saying, This is the way you ought to love.

These are the ways God in Christ loves you.

He who did not spare his own son, but graciously gave him up for us all.

How will you not, along with him, give us all things?

The Christ loves, compelled him to the cross.

His love for you.

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this.

While we were yet sinners, while we were enemies, while we were far from him, while we wanted nothing to do with him, Christ died for us.

His love is patient, his love is kind, his love always perseveres, his love never keeps a record of wrong.

In fact, as far as the East is from the West, so far as He removed your sins from you, this is the God you worship.

And for some, the reality is you've never said yes to his love.

Remember, your identity is received in Christ, not achieved.

There's nothing you can do to earn it or deserve it.

But you do have to receive it.

You do have to say yes.

Jesus, I want to step into your love.

I want to have a relationship with you.

I want to be your beloved.

And all who say yes in that moment, step out of the kingdom of darkness, into the kingdom of the sun, he loves.

You start, step into the beloved.

And I just want to invite you, maybe if you're here and you've never started a relationship, you had no idea that God loved you so much.

I want to invite you to experience his love and step into a relationship with him.

It's literally simple as a prayer, which is just a conversation with God.

I'm gonna invite us to pray, and if you wouldn't mind, close your eyes and bow your head with me.

And if you would just, if you're here and you're like, I want a relationship with the God who loves me, who's for me, experiencing his love pouring and flowing through me, would you pray after me?

Heavenly Father, I want a relationship with you, and I recognize that my love is broken, and that I've hurt people, and in things that I've said and things that I've done, and even things that I've thought, it's brought pain to me and to others, and it's brought separation between us.

It's called sin.

Today, would you please forgive me?

I want to step into your love.

I believe that you came for me and Jesus, that you died for me and that you rose again, defeating sin and death, that I might have new life.

Would you come into my life and make me new?

And just right now, while we're all still praying and heads are bowed.

If you prayed after that, would you just raise your hand so I could see?

I just would love to be able to, amen, amen, amen, amen.

Jesus, I just thank you for my brothers and sisters who've said yes to you, who've stepped into your love right now.

Would you strengthen them and overwhelm them with your presence?

Your word says the minute we say yes, the Spirit of God comes inside and dwells within us and makes us a new creation.

God, we thank you.

We thank you for the new life that has taken place today.

And God, I pray for us that you would overwhelm us now with your love and with your grace.

In Jesus' name.

Amen.

Would you stand and we'll continue in worship?

We hope you are blessed by this message.

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