MOMENTUM: Who's at Your Table?

Welcome to the Celebration Church Orlando podcast.

We are so glad you've joined us, and we hope you are encouraged by today's message.

Church, how you guys doing?

You guys doing good?

Yes, yes, yes.

I'm so so grateful to that each of you are here with us.

You know how I don't take it for granted whenever uh whenever we come together as a family, as a community to worship God together and and lifting of hands and singing songs, giving all those things our demonstrations of faith.

And as Mike had mentioned, we're we're in this series that really does talk a lot about how do we create momentum.

As you guys know, we're still very early in the year.

And for most of us, we're we're still looking and evaluating what this year can look like.

We're we're trying to create some positive momentum.

And so over the past few weeks, we've been we've been doing some praying and fasting, talking about taking ground, getting everything that God has for us.

And now we wanted to pivot on maybe you've gotten some traction, maybe you've had some success, maybe maybe there's some areas that you want to get movement, but ultimately we realize that once you get that movement, we need to have some direction and how do we maintain that same momentum.

That's really the heart behind what this series is.

And so over the past couple of weeks, we've really been just talking about how do we get momentum.

And the most simplest thing, if you were to reduce everything that we've said up to this point, it really boils down to this if you put your faith to work, you will create momentum in your life.

If you if you can just take what you believe and put it into practice, you will absolutely get momentum in your life.

And last week we talked about insecurity, one of the most powerful messages I've ever heard on insecurity, talking about the best thing that you can ever bring to a relationship is a healthy version of yourself.

If you didn't hear that message, I want to encourage you to go back and listen to it.

I think it really is one of those life-changing messages that's incredibly practical, but also is challenging in regards to how do we engage those areas of our lives where maybe we're not walking in the confidence that we need to.

And this week we want to continue in that discussion.

I really I really do believe it serves as a great bridge in regards to continuing discussion around this idea of momentum in our relationships.

If you have your Bibles, I want to invite you to join me in the Gospel of Matthew chapter 26.

Matthew 26 · chapter mention

The Gospel of Matthew chapter 26.

Matthew 26 · chapter mention

You know, if I were to, if I were to ask you, what are some of those key milestones in your life?

What are some of those things that you can see?

Like, man, there's been a there's been a lot of impact and influence in my life.

A lot of times we can we can reduce that down to a person's impact and influence.

You can look at someone's investment in us.

When I when I think about my own life and the different people that have that have played critical roles in my life and me walking in the fullness of what God's called me to be.

Even moments where I've had setbacks, a lot of times they're attached to people.

I obviously think about my mother who raised me and my brother as a single mother until my stepfather came into the picture.

And I remember that she was just a woman of profound faith, a woman of prayer, and how that had such an impact on me that even to this day I recognize the power of prayer.

I think about my stepfather who stepped into my life when I was about nine years old, who took the responsibility that my biological father didn't, and raised me like his own son, and spoke words of encouragement, and he modeled to me what does it look like to be a responsible man, to take care of your family.

And those are things that I still obviously remember to this day.

I have siblings, my brother, and just recognizing what it looks like to take up for somebody, to really step in and help people who don't necessarily have the ability to help themselves.

We have these powerful relationships that really make a big difference in our life.

I still remember my very first male mentor, a person that wasn't connected to my family, and an older man that that had my first full-time job, and just how he modeled for me what work ethic looked like and how to and how to be a strong man and be a man of your word.

So I think about these relationships that had such significant impact in my life.

And I'm pretty sure that if we were to run down the list in your own life, you can probably think of some people too.

Maybe you can think of a teacher, maybe a pastor, or someone who's come alongside you and is giving you some words of encouragement that helped you to move forward into what you know that God is ultimately calling you to do.

So all of us, if we were to think about it, we know that there are some key relationships that are critical in allowing us to move forward.

But if we can be honest, we often are still very casual about the relationships that we find ourselves getting into.

Even though we know that relationships can be a key ingredient in helping us move forward, we often can be very casual about the people that we allow to come into our lives.

It's interesting because relationships, they impact everything.

And if we're not careful, even though we know the methodology and the impact, we can just we can let people slide.

And here's the one thing that I want us to walk away with is that we have to be intentional with our relationships.

It's not something that we can run the risk of allowing it to be something that's exclusively organic.

And this doesn't, this applies to every area of our relationships, whether it be a marriage, whether it be a friendship, whatever the dynamic may be, we never graduate from needing to be intentional with the people that we allow to be in our lives.

Jesus was incredibly intentional with the way that he lived his life.

He was intentional with his relationships.

When we think about when Jesus came on the scene and he began to recognize and step into the fullness of what his calling was, he identified 12 men.

These 12 men will be the ones that he spent all of his time with, that he invested in.

These men were critical in helping him to advance the kingdom of God, but also carrying on his legacy.

He could have chosen anybody, he could have chosen emperors, he could have chosen, he could have chosen some of the best and the brightest, but he chose to use these men, flaws and all, because he knew that they would be critical in helping him to advance the kingdom.

The text that we're about to read is Jesus as he's about to, he's about to conclude his ministry.

He's he's lived his life perfectly for 30 years.

He's now done about three and a half years of ministry and healing, and and these men have been with him.

They've walked with him through it, they've seen him do some amazing things.

But now he's at what we refer to as the as the Last Supper.

It's a Passover meal.

It's the moment before he's about to go to the cross and die for all of our sins, and he's having this conversation with his disciples.

The Bible says, starting here at verse number 20, it says, When it was evening, he reclined at the table with the twelve.

And as they were eating, he said, Truly I say to you that one of you will betray me.

I want to pause there for a moment because sometimes I think we can look at these messages in the Bible and kind of brush over it, but I want us to paint the scene real quick.

Imagine you're at like the most important meal of the year with your family.

Everybody's in a good mood, the TV shows are on, everybody's having a great time, and Jesus just opens up, and his opening line is somebody around here is about to betray me.

One of y'all ain't really about this life at all.

He just opens up with that, he confronts it right in the moment.

And what the Bible says is that, and they were all very sorrowful, and it began to say to him after one after another, Lord, is it is it I am I gonna be the one that betrays you?

No, let me let me be honest with you for a moment.

If I'm sitting at the table with Jesus and he utters out this statement, I'm immediately looking around because I'm never gonna think that it's me.

I'm not gonna say, like, Lord, is it is it me?

But but maybe these men were so self-aware of their own weaknesses that they didn't think that they would escape the opportunity that potentially, if the enemy pressed hard enough that they could fall short.

I think that maybe sometimes we can think more highly of ourselves than we ought.

That sometimes we can find ourselves and say, Oh, I will never do that.

That would never be me.

These men recognize, like, I know my strengths, I know my weaknesses.

And if God is saying that one of us are going to betray him, I gotta ask the question, is it me?

Because if I have a blind spot, then maybe, Lord, you can reveal it to me.

Jesus then responds, He says, Hey, the one who has dipped his hand in a dish with me will betray me.

Again, Jesus is a savage right now because he has his hand in the bowl, getting his, he's dipping his bread.

Judas has his hand in the bowl.

Nobody else has their hand in the bowl, and they're like, Jesus, is it me?

He's like, No, the one who has their hand in the bowl with me right now, I'm looking at you, Judas.

You're the one who's gonna betray me.

Everybody look at Judas, it's you.

Like, it wasn't it wasn't like something that was subtle at all.

Like, no, the one whose hand is in me with me right now, the one who's sitting two seats next to me.

Like, he's like very, very clear about who this person is that's about to betray him.

And then Jesus goes on to say this: He says, The Son of Man goes as it is written of him.

In other words, Jesus says, It's it's necessary for me to be betrayed in order, so in order for me to go and die at the cross, there had to be a way for that to happen.

But woe to the man by whom the son of man is betrayed.

It would be better for that man if he had not been born.

If Judas couldn't get the message there, he he missed it altogether.

So watch this.

So Judas, the one who would betray him, answered, Is it I, Rabbi?

Knowing that he's already created this plan, he already had committed to it.

Is it I?

And Jesus said, Stop playing, man.

You know it's you.

That's my translation.

I don't know what version of the Bible you're reading, but mine speaks to me in the way that my mind processes information.

Stop playing, bro.

You know it's you.

Quit playing games, man.

This is what Jesus says.

So Jesus is sitting at the table, he has all these different characters, all these different, these different men, all these different strengths and weaknesses, and he's at this very intimate moment where he's about to un unfold his heart and he's revealing to them what's about to take place.

And it's all surrounding this table with relationships.

Church, I believe that sometimes we underestimate just the power and the value of the people that are sitting around us.

I think sometimes we can we can often underestimate the influence and the impact that a friendship or relationship can have on our lives.

But Jesus models for us that we have to be mindful and intentional about this.

Today I want to continue our discussion on momentum in the context of relationships.

And if you're writing this down, I want you to write this message title down.

It's really simple.

Who's at your table?

Who's at your table?

Let's pray.

God, we thank you so much, Lord, for your word.

And we thank you for an opportunity for us to come together and to worship you.

Father, I just pray over the next few moments as we dive into this subject matter of relationships, friendships, significant others, spouses, maybe we're engaged.

We're gonna we're gonna look at some things that's gonna challenge us, that's gonna encourage us, but it's gonna compel us to taking a step.

So, Lord, in this moment, Holy Spirit, I need you to do the work.

Father, I pray for open eyes that we can see you, God.

Show us ourselves, show us you, show us our relationships, God.

Open ears that we can hear your truth.

Even as we navigate through this, God, there are gonna be moments that that it's gonna it's gonna hit us, but but allow us to hear your truth.

And Lord, I pray for open hearts that we can receive everything that you want to do and lead us to.

It's in Jesus' name that we pray.

Amen and amen.

I'm gonna ask a rhetorical question that I already know the answer to, but it's gonna help me to build some momentum as I set up this thought.

Has any of us ever had, I don't know, like a misunderstanding in a relationship?

Of course we have.

It's just a natural part of our humanity because we're all looking at things from a different perspective.

And here's the thing: they can often have different magnitudes of the misunderstanding.

A simple misunderstanding could be something simple as this.

Hey, I'm gonna stop at Chick-fil-A on the way home, and um, I'm gonna do you want the large waffle fries or do you want the medium waffle fries?

Hey, get me the medium.

Oh my bad, I got you the large ones instead.

That's a simple, that's a simple misunderstanding.

It's not something that we have to get upset about.

Okay, we get it.

Just a simple misunderstanding.

I asked you for a Coke Zero, you gave me a Coke.

Okay, we can we can navigate through that.

But there are other times that we have misunderstandings that that may create a little bit more uncomfort, such as um, hey, we're leaving at 7:30, but then that person says, no, I thought we had to be there at 7:30.

You just these simple misunderstandings where it's like, no, I thought I was pretty clear.

In fact, we both got the same exact invite.

I don't have any more access to information than you do.

We're looking at the same thing, Megan.

I mean, anyway, so um let me let me move on.

Um, but there's no simple moments where we're we're we're we just have these misunderstandings.

I thought we were looking at the same content, I thought we all got the same email, I thought we were all reading, and but somehow there's a misunderstanding.

We we get all that.

We understand that misunderstandings can happen.

Sometimes the very framework of our relationship can have some misunderstandings attached to it.

Case in point, maybe maybe it's it's somebody that you care for, maybe it's their birthday.

Matter of fact, yes, today is somebody that I care for, but today is my daughter's birthday.

Can y'all give it up for my my daughter, Daniera Pittman?

23 years old.

She's in her Jordan year.

She's in her Jordan year.

Let's let's go.

Like, so she's she's 23 years old.

So we're gonna we're gonna celebrate her.

But watch this.

Maybe maybe there's a friend of yours that you know, like, hey, this is my good friend's birthday, and you know what I'm gonna do to honor them?

I'm gonna I'm gonna wish them a happy birthday on social media.

That's a major commitment when you say, I'm gonna take the time, the real estate, on my feed.

I'm not even gonna put it in a story.

I'm actually gonna put it on the feed.

I'm committed to letting these people know that this is someone that I care about and that I'm gonna tell them happy birthday, and the whole world can see it three weeks from now.

That's a major commitment.

Most of the people don't know her, so what's gonna happen is it's gonna mess up my ratio of likes because I'm ordinarily used to getting 148 likes, but they don't know her, so I might get 77 likes, but I'm still gonna commit to it.

That's the level of love that I have for it, right?

So you go ahead and do it.

Your birthday comes around.

They don't even at you, they don't even mention you.

Like, man, like I thought we were better than that.

I went public with my love for you on your birthday, and you can't even you didn't even mention me in a story, like you you couldn't do anything like that.

Maybe you had those moments where, as simple as it is, it does, it can hurt your feelings, where you feel like you're investing more and you're willing to engage more and you're not receiving it on the back.

And have you ever felt like there is a little bit of a misappropriation in a relationship where the expectations were unmet?

See, I've had I've had many friends in my life and I've had to navigate through this.

I I remember having a friend of mine a couple years ago.

I just got my car brand new, had it for probably about two weeks.

You know, when and you're in that phase where you're like washing it every day type new week, like I'm I'm washing it all the time.

It's fresh, it's so clean, everything is a vibe.

And he comes out to me, he's like, Hey man, can I take your car to the store real quick?

No, like I mean, like, like and honestly, in his mind, like he he honestly thought that our friendship was at the level that he could get the keys to the car.

I'm like, no, bro, like we're at the level of like I can drop you off on my way.

Like we're not we're not like give you the keys to the car type friends, but but sometimes we can misappropriate our friendships and then we have unmet expectations.

I I recall a couple of years ago, a good friend of mine that I went to high school with, and so we were really, really close knit.

Now, I've moved several times and and and I began an aggressive walk with God, so so obviously with certain friends you kind of drift apart, but yet we have a strong foundation and history to draw from.

Well, he reaches out to me and on social media, my numbers changed, and so he's like, hey man, can we have a conversation tomorrow around three o'clock?

Absolutely.

So in my mind, I'm thinking, anyone that knows me knows the life that I live.

Anyone that knows me knows that that I'm that I'm that I'm a I'm a I'm a pastor, that we're leading a church, that everything is going really, really well.

So I'm thinking to myself that this good friend of mine who who doesn't walk with God, and there's much evidence of that, that maybe he has some some questions about about the faith.

Because the the the the message seemed very, very intense.

If you can try to like navigate through tone, I was like, okay, so he he wants to understand some things about God.

So let me let me prepare myself.

So knowing his background, I begin to do like some preliminary research and knowing like what his previous belief system is.

I'm praying and asking God to give me wisdom and vision.

Like, God, I'm gonna talk to my friend, and I'm truly believing that this could be an opportunity where where we can, it could be a bridge that's gonna help him to embrace you, Lord.

So so Lord, I'm asking for for vision and wisdom.

Like I'm doing all this prayer and like really leaning into this because this could be that moment.

Next day we we get on the phone and we're doing like this small chatting, just kind of how's everything going?

How's your family?

Everything is good.

Then, like, hey man, so tell me what's on your mind.

And there's the moment, that moment where there's that awkward pause, like, man, I look, I know we haven't talked in quite some time, man, and um, but there's something that I really feel like you can help me with.

And I'm like, yes.

Come on, keep saying it, keep saying it.

What do you need?

He said, Man, I really believe that you can really help me with this.

I see, I see your life, man.

I really feel like you can have a significant impact on this.

I'm like, yes, say it, just say it.

He's like, Man, can I can I can I hold$1,500?

Far far be it from me to put a price tag on a friendship.

That would be completely inappropriate.

But if I were, I would tell you that me and him are not fifteen hundred dollar friends.

We're like at the level of, I may let you use my Netflix password type friends.

We're at the level of, hey man, lunch is on me type level.

We're we're certainly not at, hey man, let me hold$1,500 type friends.

Like that's that's an extreme request.

So somehow, his perception of our relationship was vastly different than mine.

And what happens a lot of times in those moments, we can request something and have unmet expectation that can create unnecessary tension because we're expecting more from the relationship than what it actually can provide.

What I think about for some of us is that maybe there's times where we're expecting things from people who just don't got it in them.

Or we're expecting things from people that they're just not looking at it the exact same way.

We see this all throughout the course of our lives, and we see it in the Bible where there's these moments where where we can have expectations, but maybe we're not looking at it the same way.

You see, when I when I think about a relationship, I look at it almost like it's a book.

And there's different pages and there's different chapters, and there are moments when certain people are on different completely chapters altogether, which means they're getting different messages.

And if we're not intentional about making sure that we orient our content, we're gonna miss it altogether.

Maybe there's moments in your life where someone makes a big request of you and you just gotta say, man, listen, we're cool, but we ain't that cool.

Those moments where it's like, okay, so clearly there's an expectation that has not been clearly defined for the two of us.

So what I believe is really important is when we look at the relationships and the people that are in our lives, is that we have to establish very clear definition.

Now, definition is not meant to create limitations with an individual, definition establishes boundaries, which allows us to establish expectations from one another.

Because if not, what can end up happening is without that definition, it leaves a lot of room for negotiation, and now we have to deal with unnecessary tension and frustration.

You see, the one thing that I've learned when I look at all of this stuff is that we can have some friendships that are incredibly close, we can have some friendships that are incredibly loose.

Maybe the context is different, but what we can't have is friendships that are neutral.

Here's what I'm saying: your relationships will either make you better and move you forward, or the relationships will not make you better and move you backwards.

But there's no such thing as having a relationship that's not doing one of the two things.

It's gonna help you to accomplish what God's calling you to do, or it's gonna be a setback ultimately to it.

And we have to identify when relationships have come to a conclusion of their season.

So often we're trying to hold on to something that's just a reflection of the past when God is trying to move us forward.

It doesn't mean that you're not still friends, it doesn't mean that you don't still have relationships, it just may mean that the access may be a little bit more limited.

Here's a couple of things that I want you to write down a couple of principles.

Relationships are built on common ground.

They have to be built on common ground.

There has to be this common ground, this common understanding of things.

The book of Amos in chapter three, verse number three, says it this way Can two walk together unless we be agreed.

I emphasize agreed because the the deed means it's past tense.

That means that there's already an agreement that has been established.

In other words, if I were to hop in a car right now with Nate and we didn't establish where we're going, it's gonna leave a lot of room for frustration when we pull up at my house in Windermere and he's trying to get to College Park, but we didn't agree on where we're going.

A lot of times we're hopping into the vehicle with our friends and with our significant others, and we haven't even defined where we're going.

The text is saying, how can we ever get to a destination that we haven't established?

How can we ever actually expect for us to be on the same page if we haven't agreed on where we're going?

In other words, listen, stop thinking that your relationships are casual and it doesn't matter.

Because what ends up happening at some point, when you begin to try to move forward with your life, you're gonna be connected with someone who's not playing by the same rules as you.

When you're dating someone and you're trying to live a life of godliness and they're not, and when you say, I'm trying to live a life of purity, that's gonna cause some friction and frustration because they're not living by the same standard as you.

And either they're gonna influence you or you're gonna influence them.

How can two move together if we haven't agreed on the rules of engagement?

The Bible says it this way in 2 Corinthians chapter 6.

2 Corinthians 6 · chapter mention

Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers.

For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness, or what fellowship does light have with darkness?

Don't misunderstand what the text is saying.

It's not saying that you can't be friends with people who aren't Christians, it's saying that you have to make sure that you don't allow Christians or people who aren't Christians to have unnecessary access that can pull you into a relationship that is not consistent with the scriptures.

So here's the thing that I want us to write down.

I want us to lean into this because this is where it gets a little uncomfortable.

There are no neutral relationships, which means this the people in your life, either God sent them or the devil did.

Listen, I still got 13 minutes.

And which for me means 20 minutes.

Okay.

Relationships are either from God or they're from the devil.

Man, that feels uncomfortable.

But here's what that means they will either push you closer to God.

Or they will pull you away from God.

Let me help you to make that distinction if we haven't made it clear enough.

If there's anybody in your life that has an issue with the fact that you are pursuing the things of God, that ain't God.

If there's anybody in your life that is frustrated with the fact that you want to orient your life and serve in the church, I promise you that ain't God.

If there's anybody in your life saying, you know what you probably shouldn't give, I promise you that's not God.

The signs are there, and now we're beginning to wrestle with the reality that everyone in your life is not sent by God.

Upon surrendering my life to God, I had to I had to make a very difficult decision.

I had childhood best friends.

We did everything together.

But as I shared with you guys, like they lived a life completely opposite of the life that I knew that God was calling me to go.

And I wanted to do everything in my strength because I felt it was my responsibility to pull them into a relationship with God.

And I and I tried and with with effort.

In other words, I tried to hang out with them.

I tried to do the things that we used to do.

I used to be in the environments that we used to be in.

And God says, Man, you're putting yourself in environments that I'm trying to rescue you from.

You wonder why you're still struggling with certain things, it's because you haven't distanced yourself from these things.

Your responsibility is to model what it looks like to walk with me, but I'm not asking you to bring me into environments that don't have my presence there.

What that means for some of us is that maybe, just maybe, that God wants you to continue to model what does it mean to be a consistent, loving Christian, but maybe you need to begin to create some distance between people that are trying to pull you back into a life that is not the life that you know that God has called you to live.

This is this is the challenge that we have to that we have to wrestle with.

If we're not on the same foundation, we will lose balance.

If we're not on the same foundation, someone's gonna lose balance.

Either one of two things.

Either I'm gonna pull you down, or you're gonna pull me down.

Either I'm gonna pull you up rather or you're gonna pull me down.

That's that's the reality of what happens in relationships.

I learned this lesson when my wife and I were going to buy our first home because I was looking at our our credit and our credit ratios and all these wonderful things.

And when I talk with our finance person and they told me our credit score, I was like, well, no, like the credit score is actually better.

They said, no, no, no.

Like, we always look at the lowest credit score because it's easier for you to navigate down to what's lower than for you to pull somebody up to what's higher.

Even the banking system knows it is so easy to pull somebody down, so much harder to pull somebody up.

If we're not on, if we're not on common ground, someone will lose balance.

Here's another thought I want you to write down relationships should make us better.

Our relationships, whether it be a spouse, whether it be someone that we're dating, whether it be a friend, our relationships should be making us better.

Proverbs 27 says it this way: As iron sharpens iron, so does one friend sharpen another.

In other words, we should be sharpening one another.

We should be making each other better.

We should actually be coming stronger because of our relationship with one another.

I shouldn't be getting dull because I'm hanging out with you.

I shouldn't have to water down my faith because I'm hanging out with you.

But I should actually be getting better by being around you, picking up some things like, wow, I really love the way that you talk about those things.

Man, I really love seeing the way that you interact with your spouse.

Man, I love the way that you are with your children.

I should be inspired when I'm around people.

And here's the thing: I should be inspiring you.

I should live a life that somehow makes you better.

But if what I am on this stage is not a reflection of what I am when you see me in a publics, then that means that I'm not consistent in what my don't get me started on this.

What I'm saying is there's no days off from being a Christian.

There's no days off, there's no environments where it's acceptable for me to be one thing but not another thing.

I have to model the kingdom of God everywhere that I go, and you should accept nothing less from me.

Man, y'all getting me stirred up.

Okay.

The people in your life will make you stronger or they will make you weaker.

What's around you will eventually get on you.

And what's on you will eventually get in you.

Y'all thought I was done, right?

What's around you will eventually get on you.

And then what's on you will eventually get in you.

Let me let me make it plain.

If you're around people who are bitter and angry, it will get on you.

And then before long, it will get in you, and now you're looking at things through the same bitter, critical, cynical lens that the people that you're around.

But it's interesting how when you surround yourself with people who are positive, who are faith-filled, who are encouraging, that somehow what's around you begins to get in you, and then the critical eye that you used to have, you actually can see God moving in it because what's around you gets on you, but what's on you gets in you.

It's a matter of what are you allowing yourself to be around.

Who's around you will influence you.

That's a fact.

The people that you allow yourself to be surrounded by, it will influence you.

So here's the thing I want you to recognize.

I believe that there are ultimately two categories that the people in our lives will fit into.

Not that the people fit into categories in the sense of their identity, but I believe that they kind of fit into these two buckets, and you'll see where I'm going with this.

Here's here's the first type of relationship that I believe that we have circumstantial relationships.

Circumstantial relationships.

That means that we are we have a great friendship depending on the circumstance.

As long as these circumstances are in a certain place, then we're gonna be good to go.

A circumstantial relationship.

That means that there's scenarios where we're for the same things.

We we have agreement on the same things.

Okay, let me let me make it plain for you.

As you guys know, I am an avid Philadelphia Eagles fan.

Let that let that sit in your soul for a minute.

Let that let the Lord speak to you right now.

I am an avid Philadelphia Eagles fan.

Now I'm looking engaging out into the room, and I realize that for some people they're feeling a little bit of resistance.

They're like, man, I'm not an Eagles fan.

One of the services, somebody actually booed me.

Booed me from platform.

I told them not to come back.

Okay.

But but watch this, watch this.

So I'm an avid Eagles fan, but let me help some of y'all that are probably resisting what I'm saying just now.

I've exhaustively studied this.

I really have.

I've given this great consideration, and I have a Bible to support it.

The eagles are God's team.

The eagles are God's team, and I'm going to prove it to you right now.

There are more than 40 references to eagles in the Bible.

I shall mount up wings like an eagle.

It is in scripture.

What I don't see in the Bible is patriots.

I don't see that.

I've never seen dolphins in the Bible.

I have seen giants, but they all get beheaded.

Don't at me either.

Don't at me.

But watch this, watch this.

I'm an I'm an avid, I'm an avid Eagles fan.

So when I used to go to the Eagles games, there would be 70,000 fans all walking into this environment.

Guess what?

We never had one conversation about our voting preferences, about our socioeconomic status, about none of that.

We were for the same things.

We were for the Eagles winning.

So that we had a circumstantial friendship that as long as we are for the same things, we have common ground.

Now, once you find me in a different context, we would probably have a lot of room to have discussions about things we don't agree with, but we are for the same things.

And so when you have circumstantial friendships, these are friendships that are based off of circumstances.

They are seasonal friendships.

Another example would be not only are we for the same things, but maybe we're against the same things.

I could take a poll right now, and I would imagine that no matter what your background is, no matter where you grew up at, no matter what your denominational preference is, no matter what any of that is, that if I were to say to you, hey man, like, are you against cancer?

I believe that 100% of the times everyone in this room will say, Absolutely.

Right?

Yeah?

Like I'm just I want to make sure, just want to make sure.

Okay, it's okay.

So we're all we all agree that we're against cancer.

That means that we've just established a common ground that we all believe that cancer is not of God.

So now not only are we for the same things, such as the Philadelphia Eagles, because if you listened to me earlier, you know that we should all be for the Philadelphia Eagles, but we're also against the same things.

We have things that we're against.

Again, beyond the doors of this, we may have a lot of things that we're not in agreement on.

But we can all agree to this, that we're against this.

That's what circumstantial relationships are.

Unfortunately, what can happen is we can look at seasonal circumstantial relationships and believe that they fit into a more deeper relationship.

Here's what the deeper relationship is.

Those are relationships that are called covenantal relationships or relationships that are a covenant.

Of course, you see this ordinarily within a husband and wife.

This is why when they take their vows, they they have this declaration that says, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, until death do us part.

Here's what a covenant means.

That means that I am for you.

I'm I may be for what you're for, I may be against what you're against, but at the end of the day, I am for you.

That means that even when you're struggling with addiction, I am for you.

That means that when you get the promotion at your job, I am for you.

That means that even if you lose your job, I am for you.

I'm not going to allow the circumstances to determine whether or not I'm going to stay in your life.

I am for you.

Those are what covenantal relationships are.

But what can happen is when we don't properly identify which one is which, we could be expecting someone to respond with a covenant when they're actually just a circumstantial friend.

I'm in your life because things are going well and because we're for the same things, but but I'm not actually for you.

I'm for what you're for because what you're for is beneficial for me.

I'm going to preach this thing if y'all let me.

I'm trying to help us to understand the distinction so that we can have appropriate expectations.

They're for you.

This is what Jesus had to deal with.

This is what we have to deal with.

Jesus was surrounded by people that had different gifts, that had different strengths, that had different weaknesses, and he had to learn to navigate through them all.

So the Bible tells us this the Bible says that Jesus had 500 disciples by the time that he was resurrected from the dead.

Five hundred of them.

So when he was resurrected from the dead, there were 500 men and women that were walking with him from the very beginning that he considered to be his disciples.

He revealed himself to them for 40 days after he was resurrected from the dead.

500 disciples.

So we have that group.

They were at a lot of the large settings and things were good.

But then we see another level of people.

There was the 72 disciples.

These are the ones that Jesus sent out to represent him to bring healing to the community.

We see them.

So those they had a little bit deeper relationship with Jesus than the 500.

They all were part of his circle, but the 72 had a little bit more access.

But then it goes even further.

Then Jesus has his 12 disciples.

Those are the ones that he did virtually everything with.

He ate with them, he traveled with them.

Those are the ones that we see their names listed in the Bible.

Like these were the people that Jesus said, okay, I'm about these guys being in my life.

I'm going to pour my life into them.

I'm going to invest in them.

I'm going to raise them up.

I want them to be at my right and my left.

These are the people that you're doing dinner with and doing life with.

But yet, there was even a more small group.

Jesus had his three.

They call them their his inner circle.

These three were ones that they had just unprecedented access to Jesus.

They were there in Matthew chapter 17 when Jesus gave them a glimpse of who he was.

Matthew 17 · chapter mention

See, a lot of times we have the ability of having all the spoilers because we know how it all turns out.

In real time, the disciples had no idea what to expect with this Jewish Messiah.

Half of them were believing that Jesus was going to come and and take over the Roman government.

They had no idea that he was going to die on a cross, be raised from the dead, and they were going to be responsible for advancing the kingdom.

They had no clue of that.

But when Jesus went on the top of Mount Transfiguration in Matthew 17, he gave them a glimpse of his glory.

The Bible says that he shined so bright that they couldn't even look at him.

That he was giving them example like, man, I'm wrapped in humanity and flaws, but I need y'all to see something more.

He basically showed them who he truly was.

There was only three men that saw that.

Those same three men are the same three men that they saw Jesus perform miracles that no one else saw.

But these same three men were also the same three men that when Jesus said, Can you watch and pray with me for an hour?

as he was sitting in the garden of Gethsemane and the weight of sin was on his shoulders.

The 12 didn't have that access.

The 72 didn't have that access.

The 500 didn't have access.

Those three, they were with Jesus, if I could say it this way.

They were at Jesus when he was at his highest, and they were with Jesus when he was at his lowest.

What Jesus was modeling for us is that everybody can't handle every aspect of your life.

There's gonna be some people they can't handle the success in your life.

There's gonna be some people that can't handle when you're struggling.

They're not gonna be able to handle when you're disappointed, when you're dealing with frustration, when you're wishing that you could go a different direction.

Everybody can't handle everything.

Jesus loved all of them equally, but everyone did not have equal access.

Let me say that again.

Jesus loved everyone equally, but everyone did not have equal access.

Unfortunately for us, we're giving people access in the 500 that only the three are supposed to have, and we're wondering why it's not being reciprocated the way that we needed to be reciprocated.

But even Jesus knew that there's certain things that the 500 just can't handle.

There's certain things that the 72 just can't handle.

There's certain things that the 12 just can't handle.

And even when we look at the three, there was still only one person who was standing at the foot of the cross when Jesus gave his last breath.

And that was John.

And Jesus looked at him and said, Man, I want you to take care of my mother.

What I'm saying to you is that is that God will allow different people to sit at our table, but we have to be mindful of the access that we give them of all the people that Jesus interacted with.

John is the only one that he said, Take care of my mom for me.

What I'm saying to us is this be mindful of the people that are sitting at your table.

When we look at this text, and Jesus is about to go into his final season of life.

We know that there are a bunch of different men that are sitting at the table.

And I truly believe that these men are an expression of character traits, personalities that some of us exhibit, but it certainly does exist in the people that's around us.

Let's look at some of the people that's at the table.

Thomas was sitting at the table.

Thomas is a disciple that when Jesus was resurrected and he appeared before the other disciples, that Thomas said, I don't believe it.

If he, if that's really Jesus, I need to see the holes in his hands and I need to touch the wounds in his side.

Here's what Thomas represents when we're thinking about who's at our table.

He represents the skeptical friend, the critical friend, the one that whenever we're sharing good news, they always just find a way of making it negative.

We need them, we need critical thinkers around us.

But here's the thing: whenever you're having a dream about moving forward in your life, the first call you need to make is not to a person who's skeptical.

That's not the person.

Now, when I tell you what I'm going to do, I need a critical friend to help me think through how I'm going to do it.

But when I'm dreaming about what I'm called to do, I don't need a skeptical person to try to shut down my dreams.

I don't need you for that.

A lot of times we're allowing people to play a role that they're not supposed to play, and we're giving them access, and they can derail the very thing that God has called us to do.

The critical people in your life are not the person you do know that you need to call when you're thinking about working out a relationship that they told you that you shouldn't have been in.

Like, hey man, we're trying to work it out.

Are you sure you're gonna work it out?

Because you know the last time you tried to write, I don't need that right now.

I don't need that right now.

I'm believing that I've heard from God.

Here's another person that is sitting at the table, Nathaniel.

The Bible says that when Jesus called him into relationship with him, he said, Oh, behold Nathaniel, in whom there is no guile.

That means that there's no lies in him.

In other words, he's a man of integrity.

The Bible says that he is very truthful.

In fact, it says that he is brutally honest.

We all know that friend who is just brutally honest.

They're not going to water it down.

There's no grace.

You ask them a question, they're gonna be brutally honest.

They're like your blunt friend.

Not that kind of blunt.

Like I'm talking about, just like they're very, very direct.

I don't want y'all to get sidetracked.

They're like blunt friend, man.

Look, I got a couple of them.

Okay, listen.

That's a person that that when you say, like, hey man, do you like this outfit?

No, it looks terrible on you.

Like they're they're gonna be very honest.

Now we need those friends, but we have to be mindful of when we engage them because we don't want their truth to be so hurtful that we can't see God's grace in the moment.

That's what that represents.

Also, sitting at the table is a man named Simon the Zealot.

Simon the Zealot, he's very, he's very high justice.

The zealots back in those days, these were people that opposed the Roman government.

So he literally would like, he would like die for his beliefs.

He hated the government.

He felt like Rome was coming in and they were a tool of the enemy.

So he fought with everything that he had in him to fight against the Roman government.

He represents people who are very high justice.

They're the ones who are gonna be really dialed into cultural issues.

And I love them.

You need those people around you.

But when you say good morning to them, they're like, hey man, we don't say good morning because when you do a background study on the word good, that's actually connected to slavery, and that's why we don't say good.

I just wanted to say hi.

Like I didn't, I didn't hear.

We need those people in our lives.

We need those people that are gonna give us background, they're gonna help us to be sensitive to what's happening culturally so that way we don't lose sight of it.

We need them, we just gotta be mindful of when we can engage their content.

But the very opposite of him is Matthew.

Matthew is a Jewish man who was a tax collector.

That means that he worked for the very government that Simon hated.

So now what Matthew represents, he represents the friends who compromise.

He's lined up with something that they knew was opposite of what they felt the kingdom of God was supposed to be.

But somehow Jesus was able to navigate these relationships and have them all sitting at the table at the same time.

But maybe for some of us, we know a Matthew in our life, the one who's compromising and doing things that they know is probably not accurate, but they're just trying to survive.

Maybe for some of us that's us.

Man, like why do you keep putting yourself in these compromising positions?

Man, I'm just trying to survive.

Why did you take that job when you know it's gonna be a challenge to your integrity?

I just gotta provide for my family.

That's the Matthew friends, the ones who compromise because they're just they're just trying to survive.

Peter's sitting at the table.

And who among us doesn't love a Peter?

Peter is passionate, Peter is impulsive, he is quick to love, but he's also quick to fight.

We know we know Peter's in our lives, the ones who are the ones who will come into church service with you and will worship God.

But the moment that we get outside these doors, and if somebody takes your parking spot, we'll get out and fight them in the streets.

Those those are the extremes of Peter.

Like, man, I love you, but I hate you at the same time.

Like, Peter is that guy, the one who's all over the place.

But you know, like, man, like if I gotta fight somebody, I'm bringing Peter with me.

Like he's he's that friend.

We all got that friend that, like, man, if I need, if I need you, yo, I I you don't gotta do that.

But I'm so glad that you would do that for me.

Like, that's that's the peters in our lives, and we all we all know that he plays a critical part.

But here's the other side we have James and John.

These are powerful men, they were part of the inner circle.

These are the men that had incredible access to Jesus.

But the Bible says that when they were having dinner one day, that James and John said, Hey Jesus, come here, let me let me talk to you for a minute.

Like, I know that we're part of the inner circle, I know that things are going really well.

Um, hey, like this isn't for the rest of them.

Um, but when you come into your kingdom, can me and my brother sit at your left and your right?

Like they represent the friends who are needy.

No matter how much you give them, they always want more.

I give you all my attention and you still want more.

I complimented you, but you need me to compliment you again.

Like it's it's the it's the needy friends where no matter what you do, they still need more from you.

And the truth of the matter is sometimes that can that can certainly be yes.

In addition to having our needy friends, we have Judas sitting at the table.

Judas is selfish, self-centered.

He represents people who are constantly offended.

The Bible says that when Judas betrayed Jesus, that he actually thought he was doing the right thing because he felt that Jesus was getting off track of what his mission was.

So he literally betrayed him because he thought he was doing the right thing, because he was offended that everything didn't flow through him anymore.

He was offended at Jesus' generosity, he was offended at everything.

These are the friends who are just super, super easy to be offended.

Everything revolves around them.

These are these are the friends that that are so self-centered that when you just want to have a conversation and share what's going on with your life, they find a way to make it about them.

Man, I had a such a tough day at work.

You know what?

I had a tough day at work too.

Like I get that, but I'm trying to share what's going on in my heart.

Man, like I'm not feeling well.

You know what?

I'm not feeling well either.

Like everything turns to being about them because that's what self-centered, selfish friends do.

No matter what you're talking about, they have to find a way to connect it to themselves.

And the moment that you identify that, they have the read, they have the they have the audacity of being offended.

Here's the thing: they each had a seat at the table, they each had a part that they played.

But it's still important for us to identify the people that are in our lives so that way we don't have unmet expectations.

So the question is who are some of those people in your life?

And I'm pretty sure as I'm looking at some of the nods and some of the process, and maybe you're thinking through some of it.

But here's the other side of that question: which one are you?

Are you the needy one?

Are you the critical one?

Are you the one that makes everything about yourself?

Are you the one that's always offended?

Are you the one that just can't have a conversation?

Like, which which one are you?

Because the truth is, we all have moments where we can lean into any of these things.

So here's what I want to leave you with.

Maybe the question is okay, maybe some of this is me.

Maybe this is some people that I know.

How do I become better at it?

How do I become better at the relationships in my life?

I can give you a 14 point message on how to become a better husband, a better, a better wife.

A better student.

I could give you a list of all these things.

But time won't allow me to do it, so I want to simplify it in a way that I make it, I think it translates to all of us.

Galatians chapter 5, verse 22 and 23.

Galatians 5:22

The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

Yes, I could give you a whole bunch of steps on how to become better in your relationships, but you know what I found?

If you are a husband in here and you can just begin to walk in love, to walk in joy, to walk in peace, to walk in patience, to walk in kindness, to walk in goodness, to walk in faithfulness, to walk in gentleness, to walk in self-control, you will literally be the best husband in the world.

If you are a father in here and you can just begin to walk in love, to walk in joy, to walk in peace, to walk in patience, to walk in kindness, to walk in goodness, to walk in faithfulness, to walk in gentleness, to walk in self-control, you will be the best, you'll be the best parent there ever is.

If you could just be the type of friend that walks in love, you will be the best for never.

If you could be a friend that walks in joy and peace, you will be the best forever.

Instead of us trying to find the quickest way to get to it, how about allowing the Holy Spirit to lead through us and beginning to say, I'm just gonna walk in love, I'm gonna walk in peace wherever there's conflict, I'm gonna speak life.

Whenever there's frustration, I'm gonna speak words of hope.

That will make you the best person in your relationships.

If I can begin to model what God's word says and not allow it to be about my strengths and weaknesses, but allow the Holy Spirit to flow through me, that is how you become better in your relationships.

That is how it is.

And the beautiful thing about it is it applies to every relationship in your life, whether you're married, whether you're single, whether you have best friends, whatever, if you can do these things, I promise you you will be the best person in any relationship that God will lead you to.

But here's the question a lot of times we can't do this in our own strength.

If we were to take an assessment right now, and we were to identify where we are at the table, or maybe identify what some of our weaknesses are, the truth is we can't do this without the Holy Spirit.

This is why the Bible said it's the fruit of the Spirit.

The Holy Spirit is the one that allows us to do this because in our own strength we just can't do it.

So with every head bowed and with every eye closed, I simply want to engage us in two simple, powerful, but practical questions.

Maybe you're in here with us right now.

And as you begin to evaluate your relationships, no matter what they are, there's an awareness that I need the Holy Spirit to show up in order for me to be the most effective in any relationship that God has led me to.

Keith, I need to walk in more love, I need to walk in more joy, I need to walk in more peace, I need to be more gentle, I just need to be more kind.

I need to be more positive, I need to be more humble in my relationships.

Some of this is simply saying, I need the Holy Spirit to give me the strength in the areas that I'm weak.

If that's you, and you want to engage the Holy Spirit in how, how you can be more effective in any relationship that you're in.

I want to pray for you right where you are.

If that's you, on account of three, would you boldly lift your hands up?

One, two, three, inviting the Holy Spirit into your relationships.

Amen, amen, amen, amen, amen.

Hands up everywhere because I think we all want the help of the Holy Spirit in any relationship that we're in.

You can go ahead and put those hands down.

I hope that everyone can sense the reality that we all need God.

And so here's what that means: there's no greater relationship that you will ever have than your relationship with Jesus.

Because the truth of the matter is, outside of him we can't do those things.

Outside of him, we can't walk in love.

Outside of him, we can't walk in joy and peace.

Maybe you're in here right now and you have thoughts about all the different relationships in your life, but the fact of the matter is Jesus is not the Lord of your life.

You're not in a relationship with him.

The Bible speaks about how Abraham and Moses began to speak with speak with God as if he was their friend.

In other words, they were in a close relationship.

Maybe that's your next step.

To commit or recommit your life to Christ.

I don't want you to miss out on this opportunity to change your relationship status.

If that's you, and you simply want to commit or recommit your life to Christ, on account of three, I want to pray for you.

So would you boldly lift your hands up?

One, two, three.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

God bless you, amen.

I see those hands in the back.

God bless you, amen, amen.

Come on, church.

You know we celebrate much more than that whenever we see that someone is saying that I am ready to come home.

When someone is saying, I don't got it figured out, but I know that I need God to come into my life.

I'm not talking about they gotta perfect it, but what they do recognize that Jesus is the only way.

We celebrate with you.

I want to ask everyone to stand on their feet as we prepare to go back into worship.

We're gonna pray.

We're gonna worship.

I'm gonna ask that no one leave just yet.

We're gonna be out of here within five minutes, but then we're gonna have someone come out.

They're gonna give you some instructions on what your next steps are, especially for those who are saying yes to Jesus for the first time.

But it's my belief that it's in this moment we're gonna seal in what we see God doing.

Heavenly Father, I thank you, God, that you reveal to us who is at your table.

And I believe it's a type and shadow of people that may be at our table and whose tables we are at.

God, I pray.

I pray that we can be people that walk with the Galatians 5 mentality, God, where we can exhibit the fruit of the Spirit and every single relationship in our lives, God.

We don't have to strive, but if we can simply walk in love, God, it can change the entire atmosphere.

So, Father, I pray for any area where there's deficit, God, that you become in and that we will make us strong.

We invite your Holy Spirit to order our steps, to guide our lives, and to strengthen us.

So, Father, in the name of Jesus, we surrender our lives to you.

We invite your Holy Spirit to come in and to give us strength.

And it is in Jesus' name that we pray.

Amen.

Amen and amen.

Come on, church, let's worship together.

Thank you for tuning in to today's podcast.

For more information about Celebration Orlando or to get in touch with us, please visit celebrationorlando.org.