The Covenant Nature of Biblical Marriage, Part 2 | Pastor Andrew Coleman | 11/16/2025

This morning again we are coming to

first Peter and it's kind of

interesting. Three weeks ago we looked

at a sermon because of where first Peter

goes that started something started a

min a mini season a minieries is what I

mean by that. Three weeks ago we looked

at this sermon submission in marriage a

doozy. Remember we've talked about

submission to government submission at

work and then we look at submission in

marriage. Well, that's a hot tamalei. In

fact, what's interesting about this is,

and I've shared with this with with you

this a little bit, several weeks ago,

six or eight weeks ago, the pastors were

talking and praying as we often do, and

we were just talking about all the fact

that our world is truly lost when it

comes to marriage. We've we've just seen

a lot happen and that has found its way

into many churches. It's found its way

into our church. We struggle in our

family life. We struggle in our

marriages very often. And um we were

just deeply burdened for this and we

started looking at the need for us to do

an emphasis on this. And then while we

were sitting there, Pastor Ben said,

"Now wait a minute. In just a couple of

weeks, we're going to be at 1 Peter

1 Peter 3 · chapter mention

chapter 3. And as we were talking and

praying about it, we just said we need

to take a little bit of time. It goes

right with what our our study in First

Peter, but we want to look a little bit

more in depth. Now, why this miniseries

in First Peter? Why? This isn't on your

notes. This is for free. So, look at

number one. The first one is this. At

this present moment, our families, our

marriages

need help. And that's right here at

Sheran Hills. That's the people in this

room. That is us. Um, you know, wherever

you are in your marriage, I'll guarantee

you it can improve. Um, you might say,

"Well, we're at the top of the world.

We're doing better than we've ever

done." Well, praise the Lord. I'll

guarantee it can improve. But you know

what? There's a lot of people who would

say, "We're not at the top of the world.

We're not where um uh we would like to

be and we have growth. We have we have

real need to work on these issues. Maybe

you're young people. You're you're a

young person and you're looking toward

this. I we are very concerned about

everything the world is teaching you

about marriage. And so we want to we

want to recognize that. And what we've

seen is number two is this. For 65

years, marriage has been under a frontal

assault, that means a front-on attack

since the 1960s.

So when we saw the the love generation a

revolution, the free love movement, when

we saw all of the moorings of our

society begin to shake at even the

familial level,

um we saw there was there was new ideas

that are being popularized and from that

time on that has been a real issue. um

to the point where we don't even want to

go into all the various legislation that

if my grandparents were still alive,

they would be absolutely shocked that

our society is grappling with these

issues. How about number three?

For over 100 years, the re since the

1920s,

for over 100 years, the real meaning of

marriage has been forgotten or lost to

our society. Amen.

around the 1920s and by the way there

were some things that were going on in

the 1920s philosophically

um and theologically going back to the

1870s where as you see Dar Charles

Darwin's ideas come to prominence as you

see the scientific age turn into the

industrial age and all of that in higher

education we saw a great liberalization

of Christian theology ology. There was

more and more higher academics that

rejected the Bible as the word of God.

Many of you know that one of my favorite

and most important mentors from history

is a man named Charles Heden Spurgeon.

He was a pastor in London, England. He

began preaching when he was 16 years old

and he was known as a powerful preacher

for the word of God. And as he lived his

life and became the most popular pastor

in the world, was preaching to thousands

and that five to 6,000 people at various

points in his ministry.

He saw that the pulpit of England were

leaving the Bible. He saw that many

pulpits in England were going the way of

modernism. They were going the way of

the scientific age. They were going the

way of philosophy over theology.

And the philosophy instead of being

informed by proper theology, theology

was being informed by secular

philosophy. So whether it was Carl Young

or Sigman Freud or Charles Darwin or

many of the other movements at that

time, we saw that many many pulpits

became ashamed

of the Bible.

Well, this was what Charles Haden

Spurgeon would call the great downgrade.

It was called the great downgrade as he

preached against it, as he wrote against

it, as he wrote books. He started a

pastor's school for it. And so there was

a great push back and it was Charles

Haden hadn't dar excuse me Charles not

haden Darwin Charles Haden Spurgeon who

pushed and pushed until there was

actually a breakthrough

of pastors being trained in proper

theology. Once again,

he went down to the French Riviera

in and dealt with depression.

Um, eventually he died in his 50s.

Um, a young man to die in his 50s and he

was sadly missed but his legacy lives

on. So for over a hundred years number

three there for over a hundred me years

the real meaning of marriage as as those

false ideas began to take over the real

meaning of marriage had been lost. So

that is why we are taking some time and

as a church we always want to take some

time to remember the issue of marriage.

We want to remember the beauty of

marriage. And that's why we as we do

that, as we look and we remember God's

design in this, not just a wedding

ceremony, but as we look at the meaning

of it all, we want to hold on to the

gospel and remember what is the covenant

nature of marriage. So, what I've done

this morning is this because this is so

important. Um, and I know that many of

you uh were here last week, some of you

were not. What I'm going to do is I'm

going to quickly fly through the very

important message from last week. And

the reason I want to do that is because

it always helps for you to see and hear

it again a little bit, but also for

those who haven't been here, because the

message today hinges on the message from

last week. So I want you to see that. I

want you to remember what we looked at

last week. Now as we do this, the

pastors and I were meeting on Tuesday.

You know, Tuesdays we have staff

meeting, the pastors meet before that.

And one of the things that we do is we

pray and as we talk and we pray for you

is we evaluate whoever preached the last

Sunday that we evaluate the sermon. So

we all talk about it and we we pray

about it. Um, well, one of the things

that Pastor William mentioned this last

Sunday or excuse me, this last Tuesday

was he said Sunday's message flipped

something upside down for him.

He said, "It's true that I grew up

mainly and almost exclusively

thinking about marriage as completely

about a man and a woman.

two people coming along. I mean, when

you think about, well, what else would

you think of?

Marriage is between a man and a woman

and it's about this earthly life. God

gave us marriage. But

when we've been when we looked at this

last Sunday, he said it became evident

to me that the far bigger marriage,

the far bigger point that God is making

to us is not between just merely a man

and a woman, but it's between heaven and

earth. It's between God and his people.

It's between Christ as the bridegroom

and God's people, the church.

That is the bigger marriage. You say,

"Well, how could how could we think that

way? How how could we see that?" Well,

we can only see that by faith. You know,

faith is the assurance of things hoped

for, the conviction of things what

>> unseen.

And so when we think about marriage

between a man and a woman, that's seen.

It's it's not fully about faith.

But when we study the Bible, as we did

and as we're going to remember this last

from this last Sunday, when we study the

Bible, we see that it's all about a

wedding.

It's all about a marriage.

That's the whole message of salvation.

It's about a marriage. It's a marriage

between God and his people.

>> Amen.

>> That's what the scripture reveals

beginning in the first chapter of the

Bible and going all the way to the last

chapter of the Bible. This is the

overarching message

of the Bible is about a marriage. And

it's much bigger than a marriage between

two humans. It's a marriage between an

eternal God and all of his redeemed

people. This is amazing. And so we start

to see that this this marriage has a

covenant. That's what it is. It's it's a

covenant. Notice here with me and let's

go very quickly. Get ready. Warm up your

pen. We want to see this. Roman numeral

number one is the foundational truths

about marriage from Genesis 1 and 2. We

looked at that again. Letter A. Marriage

is prefall. It's pre sin. Therefore,

what did we say? It's part of the what?

The very good creation. Very good. Some

of you got that. Some of you remembered

that it was good. Marriage was prior to

sin. It was prior to the curse. There

are three covenantal actions from

Genesis 2:24. Notice that passage in

Genesis 2:24

front of you. Look what it says there.

Therefore, a man shall leave. And go

ahead and go to the next slide there,

guys. Let them see it. Okay. Therefore,

a man shall leave his father and mother

and hold fast to his wife, and they

shall become what? One flesh. So, we

said, leave, cleave, and one flesh. This

is at the very beginning. This is God's

plan. Letter C, Adam's first words upon

seeing Eve were covenantal poetry. He

looks at her and he says, "Wow, this at

last is bone of my bones and flesh of my

flesh. She shall be called woman because

she was taken out of man." This is the

first human speech recorded. This is the

first words that humans are recorded to

have said and it had to do with

covenant. It had to do with covenant

marriage. This is amazing. It's a

confession of covenant union. Roman

numeral number two marriage as a

covenant not a mere what do you remember

what we said? It's a covenant not a mere

contract. contract protects two people

from one another that while allowing

them to do something a covenant binds

two people to one another and we see

that through proverbs and Malachi and in

fact many many other passages there's

four covenant signs um in Old Testament

marriage it was the bride price the

written document the cup of wine and the

declaration and witness the public

declaration and witnesses you know you I

I wanted to emphasize that last point

more last week. You you don't marriage

is a public thing. It's it's before

others. In fact, the Old Testament

required that. You couldn't be married

to somebody in private and nobody know

that you were married. I told you about

my grandmother um getting off running

off and getting married and then coming

home. They didn't tell anybody for a

while until later. Um I I highly do not

recommend that kids don't do that.

Please don't do that. Um you need to

enter into that with great due course

and preparation. But um it is a public

thing. And just like this,

your rel to this your relationship to

God is certainly personal,

but it's not private.

your relationship with God. Jesus, his

relationship to you was very personal.

But listen to this. It was not private.

Jesus died publicly for you. He died for

the whole world to see. And so we are

called to live publicly for him. So we

are called to be not ashamed of him, not

in private, not in obscurity and

anonymity. We are called to represent

and to see that relationship as a public

relationship. Look at the next part

here. Roman numeral number three. You've

already turned to page two. The covenant

pattern. And what do we see throughout

the Bible? What we see is God's

marriages to Israel. You say marriages,

you mean multiple. Oh, how many times

did they break his covenant? How many

times did he circle back with them? How

many times did he listen to this did he

reestablish

another covenant with them? He didn't go

listen remember this. He didn't say,

"Okay, I'm done with the Jews. I'm

moving on to the Phoenetians. I'm going

on to the Greeks. I'm going on to the

Romans." That's not what he did. He

stayed with the people that he had

originally promised a covenant to. This

is amazing. And so we see this um uh

letter A, Yahweh, that's God right above

Yahweh. God, that's his personal name.

Yahweh repeatedly describes himself as

Israel's husband. We see that there's

many other passages besides these that

are here. But you see that look at

Isaiah 54:5.

Isaiah 54:5

For your maker is your husband. That's

maybe my favorite one. the one who made

you says I I am your husband. I am with

you. Um many others that are there.

Letter B adultery

is breaking is covenant breaking and

that comes from idolatry. When I

preached that a couple of weeks ago,

somebody came up to me and said, "I had

never thought about that. I never

thought about adultery as being

idolatry. It's anything that we put in

front of God. And when you put another

person who is not your mate um before

yourself, what you're doing is you are

you are abandoning God's plan and you

are embracing your own plan. You are

going after idolatry. You're worshiping

something else. Letter C, divorce

certificate. This is the covenant

termination. And this you remember with

me, Jesus said, because of the hardness

of your heart, Moses allowed you to

divorce your wives. But from the

beginning it was what? It was not so. So

this is this was not the plan. Look at

letter D. New covenant, new marriage.

And I love Jeremiah 31. Can you put a

big circle around Jeremiah 31? I'll just

say to you, um, in the last week, I have

read Jeremiah 31 at least one time every

day. Um, God has been doing a work in my

own heart in Jeremiah 31. Um, and I I

want to encourage you. It is where we

see the glorious redemption. One of the

places where we see the glorious

redemption of God. That is the promise

of a perfect marriage with his people.

That is that is his plan. He's going to

give he has promised us a perfect

marriage with us. This is his salvation

that comes to us. And Ezekiel also

mimics that as well. Look at verse 26.

Ezekiel 36 verse 26. And I will give you

Ezekiel 36:26

a new heart. A new spirit I will put

within you. And I will remove the heart

of stone from your flesh from your flesh

and give you a heart of flesh. And I

will put my spirit within you and cause

you to walk in my statutes and be

careful to obey my rules. So this is God

completely giving us a new heart so that

we can obey. Uh we said the new covenant

is unbreakable and it is eternal

remarage of God to his redeemed people.

This is amazing. All of their infidelity

was forgiven. He replaces their heart

and he becomes perfectly one with them.

Well, flip the page. Roman numeral

number four. We saw that Christ

is the one who is the ultimate

bridegroom. He is the ultimate

bridegroom. He is the one that is going

to marry his people. And we see A, B, C,

D, E. All of these evidences of this

John's testimony, Jesus's first miracle

was at a wedding in Canaa, the parable

of the wedding feast. Paul's statement,

Paul's statement was very important.

Look at that on your outline. Letter D,

his explicit statement. Therefore, a man

shall leave his father and his mother

and hold fast to his wife, and the two

shall become one flesh. That's Paul

quoting from Genesis. And then he says

this, this mystery is profound. And I'm

saying that it refers to Christ and the

church. And so here it is. This is the

big marriage being mentioned of Christ

and the church. And though notice letter

E, Christ's covenant sealing blood. If a

marriage is a covenant, here it is. It's

sealed in this covenant. The cup that is

poured out for you is the new covenant

in my blood. And then Hebrews 13:20. Now

Hebrews 13:20

may the God of peace equip you with

everything good through what? Read it

out loud. The blood of the eternal

covenant. This is the bigger marriage.

This is the eternal marriage.

Our marriage here in this earthly life

to husband and wife is not an eternal

marriage. The Mormons are wrong about

that. Um here we see and in numerous

other places in the scripture that the

real eternal marriage is the marriage of

God to his people. Look at Roman numeral

number five. If Christ is the ultimate

bridegroom, then we see in this the

church, God's people as the covenant

bride. That's what we see here. And so

this is the beautiful picture of our

present reality. He we are a betrothed

version. We are engaged to be married in

Christ. And what we read in the Bible in

the book of Revelation at the end as we

look toward the end of this present

earthly life, the picture is the future

consummation of God and his people

finally being together without time or

space or sin in between. That's the big

picture. Look at Revelation 19:6.

Revelation 19:6

Um he says, "Hallelujah for the Lord our

God the Almighty reigns. Let us rejoice

and exalt and give him the glory."

Underline it. "For the marriage of the

Lamb has come and his bride has made

herself ready. Blessed are those who are

invited to underline it the what?

>> Marriage supper of the Lamb." This is

the big marriage. This is the big

wedding and this is the great plan that

is eternal. Revelation 21. So right

there at the very end of the Bible, we

see it. And I saw the holy city, New

Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven

from God, prepared as a bride, adorned

for her what?

>> Husband. Come, I will show you the

bride, the wife of the lamb.

Now, this is

the thing that flips everything on its

head. This is what Pastor William was

talking about was, wow, in scripture,

the grander concept, the greater picture

is not my earthly relationship to Sam,

but it is my heavenly relationship with

Christ. and not just mine, but all of

the redeemed, all of those who are in

Christ. This is God's whole point in

making us male and female in giving us

husband and wife. Notice this statement

at the bottom there.

Um, at the consummation of the ages, and

I put above that this time for you, the

marriage supper of the lamb that we just

read about. At the consummation of the

ages, the church perfectly purified,

radiant in resurrection glory, forever

one with the lamb, descends as the new

Jerusalem to dwell with God in the

eternal, unbreakable marriage where

every tear is wiped away and God's

words, "Behold, the dwelling place of

God is with man in effect becomes the

everlasting ing what I do. This is God

saying I am with you forever. I do

finally and forever never to be

separated from you. So part two is right

here and I want you to see this. This is

really valuable for us this morning. Um

so this is just just imagine 168 167

hours ago. We keep going. Okay. So, last

Sunday to right now at this same time,

we keep going. Look at this with me.

Covenantal implications. Covenantal

implications for Christian marriage. It

says, what does this mean? Where does it

go? Every earthly marriage between a

husband and a wife is a temporary

illustration. Can you underline that? a

temporary illustration

of God's underline permanent

relationship between himself and his

people. Your earthly marriage, your

parents' earthly marriage,

your the people that are everybody that

you know that this is a temporary

illustration

of something far grander that is

permanent.

So what does this practically mean for

our marriages? If that's what marriage

means, how do we live that out? How do

we do it? Now, what I'm saying to you is

this.

When I say that over the last 100 to 150

years, the real meaning of marriage has

been lost. This is what I'm talking

about. The vast majority of you have

never truly thought about

your marriage with God being a much

grander marriage or the church's

marriage with Christ being the much

grander marriage. We just think in terms

of earthly marriage. And the reason we

do that is because this doctrine, this

truth, this reality of the whole Bible

has been neglected in Bible teaching.

We haven't been taught this reality. In

fact, I mean, I I would hear that

sometimes as a kid growing up, mainly at

a wedding, Christ in the church, but to

be honest with you, it wasn't until

years later that I started to really

realize what it all is pointing to. Now,

I my prayer is if you're in middle

school today, maybe even a little bit

younger than that, my prayer is is that

you're starting now as a fourth grader,

a fifth grader, a sixth grader, seventh

grader, starting to just come into your

whole life understanding that God wants

a permanent relationship with you.

God has designed it so that that the

church, God's people, can truly know him

for eternity. And that's what he's

designed this whole life to point to.

And so my prayer is is that we would

recognize this and then live like it.

Live like it. You say, "Well, how does

this have to do with our communication

problem?" Or, "How does this have to do

with we have different views? We have

different views. That that's the reason

we're struggling." or or maybe our co,

you know, my love or her love has grown

cold toward me or we have some bad

habits in our marriage. Let me tell you,

one of the most important things that

you can do in wanting to have a healthy

biblical marriage is to understand what

it means.

And if you will come to understand what

it means, you are far more likely to be

able to work through your earthly

marriage issues.

You're far more likely as you start to

see it kind of like you're seeking to

walk with Christ and you need to learn

about that where you're also, listen to

this, you're also seeking to learn to

walk with your spouse. And learning to

walk with your spouse can help you learn

to walk with Christ. And learning to

walk with Christ can help you walk with

your spouse because God has a purpose

for it. And I want us to see what that

is. Look at letter A.

So the implications for Christian

marriage. Here it is. What does it mean?

It means that the ultimate goal of our

marriage is to display

Christ's covenantkeeping

love. That is the ultimate goal is so

that your earthly marriage can display

Christ's covenant-keeping love. You see,

notice the first one here. God gave us

marriage to display his covenanteping

love to ourselves. To ourselves. He He

gave it for so that you can see it and

you can learn of it. How about this? God

gave us marriage to display his covenant

keeping love to other believers. So

other believers see your life, they see

your marriage, they see your

relationship, and hopefully the picture

is is that your life will reflect the

love of Christ. And so other believers

can be encouraged by that. You know,

this this idea that Christians live as

lone ranger Christians, that's that's

patently ungodly.

Just like your relationship

is not your relationship with God is not

private but it's personal. Listen to

this. It's also not individual.

Your relationship with Christ is not

meant to be merely indivi individual. It

is meant to be corporate. And that's

what we see God dealing with Israel.

That's what we see God dealing with the

church. It certainly has the personal

individual element to it, but we don't

see everything in scripture all about

you being it's just you and God. What we

really see is the scripture constantly

talks about God and his people.

And so that's I'm so proud of you for

being here this morning to come and to

learn of Christ together that when you

get a name tag and you enter in and you

say good morning to someone, what you're

doing is that's Hebrews tells us that's

even part of worship. That our

fellowship with one another, our

relationship with one another is part of

our worship of God. There's people who

have come to our church, they come

first, second, third time, and they kind

of look at everybody and they go, "These

people can't. They they got to be

they're fake. They don't really care

about each other. There's one guy in our

church. He's an investigator for a

police department. And he just said,

"The first several times I came to

church, I was like, "Okay, this these

people are over the top. I mean, they

they act like they actually care about

how my week went."

And you know, he goes home and he tells

his wife that and she goes, "Well, I

think it's cuz they do."

Now, we're not perfect about that.

There's no doubt about it. But, you

know, we don't shuffle in and shuffle

out and just wave.

That person said that he went to a

church for 40 years and he only knew a

handful of people.

That is not Christlike. That is not God

has designed us to be together in this

life to walk together in this life

honoring the Lord. The third one is

this. God gave us marriage to display

his covenanteping love what to the

world. This is part of the witness that

God has his people on the earth for.

Israel existed so that and the you could

say the motto was of the Old Testament.

Israel was there God's chosen people.

God was dealing with Israel and the

whole idea was come and see. Come and

see God dealing with his people. And

that's why they were supposed to be

faithful to him. So if they were

faithful to him, they would look

different than the other nations of the

earth. The other nations would come and

see God dealing with them, God, their

obedience to God, God blessing them, and

the other nations of the earth could

look and see this God and his people and

seek to join in. But Israel, of course,

kept messing that up. They kept not

being faithful to him. But God's

relentless love kept coming back after

them over and over. his covenant with

them prevailed over their rejection of

him. In the New Testament, we don't see

come and see. In the New Testament, we

see that the message to God's people is

go and tell. Go and tell. You've come

and you've seen Jesus now. Go and tell

the world. Because this gospel, this

covenant relationship is for everyone.

Well, one of the ways that we can do

that is that we live out God's plan for

covenantkeeping

love. That means it's a love that keeps

a covenant that was made. It's a love

that in the hard times and when you

don't feel like you're in love anymore,

you keep the covenant.

It's a love that goes. Do you think God

had warm fuzzy feelings throughout all

of the Old Testament toward his people?

Now, some of you haven't studied the

Bible yet enough to know this. I could

read you passages of scripture that

would just make your hair curl right now

about God's anger toward his people

because of their unfaithfulness to him.

His anger burned against them. But you

know, it's interesting that even though

that was there, God continued in his

love for them. God remained faithful to

the covenant that he had made when they

had not over and over again. And so God

was saying this covenant shall stand.

Letter B. What does covenant? What does

the covenantal implications mean? Letter

B. It means our marriages are intended

to be indissoluble. Indissoluble. What

does that indissoluble mean? Put out

there to the side. Cannot be dissolved.

Cannot be dissolved. It's not meant to

be dissolved. It's not meant to be done

away with. It's meant to stand.

That's God's intention for us that the

marriage would stand. And he and we see

even in the New Testament, Romans 7:es

1-3, the Apostle Paul is writing to the

Romans. And look what he says. Or do you

not know, brothers, for I am speaking to

those who know the law, that the law is

binding on a person only as he lives?

For a married woman is bound by law to

her husband while he lives. But if her

husband dies, she is released from the

law of the marriage. In verse three,

accordingly she will be called an

adulteress. if she lives with another

man while her husband is alive. But if

her husband dies, she is free from that

law. And if she marries another man, she

is not an adulteress. Here's the picture

here. There's a few cases that Jesus

gives and the Apostle Paul gives where

marriage is, excuse me, um being divided

or dissolving a marriage. A divorce is

is not the original plan. That's exactly

what we read from Jesus. But there are a

few cases where that is permitted

because of sin.

But other than that, other than those

few cases of that, we see a great

emphasis on God holding together, on

people holding together in their

marriage when they don't feel like it.

When they feel like it's not what they

thought, when they are disappointed,

when they feel even hurt. The picture is

this. You hold on to this because this

is the example of what God does with

you. He holds on to you. And when you

don't hold on to it, when you break this

earthly marriage before you, what you're

saying and what you're doing is you're

breaking God's wonderful illustration of

his love for you. You're ruining that

example for your life and for others.

And so, this is a very important aspect

of this. Look with me here in Matthew

Matthew 19 · chapter mention

chapter 19. Jesus is speaking and he

said, "Therefore, a man shall leave his

father and his mother and hold fast to

his wife and the two shall become one

flesh." Again, that's coming from

Genesis verse 6. So they are no longer

two, but one flesh.

What therefore God has joined together,

let not man separate." They said to him,

"Why then did Moses command one to give

a certificate of divorce and send her

away?" Verse 8, he said to them,

"Because of your hardness of heart,

Moses allowed you to divorce to to

divorce your wives, but from the

beginning it was not so." Yes, that was

in last Sunday's sermon and it bears

repeating for today. that this is the

grand picture. And because we have

listened to the world's answers on this

and not to God's notice letter C, it

means a husband is to sacrifice himself

for the welfare of his wife.

What's the next word?

>> Continually.

You see, Christ never stopped

sacrificing himself for the welfare of

his people. He does it ultimately and he

does it continually. And that's what we

see in the scripture that God, listen to

this, God wants to us to learn about his

love for us by husbands learning to lay

down their lives for their wife.

This is amazing. She see Jesus did it

all the way to his death to save and to

cleanse the church from sin. Now Andrew

cannot give up his life physically to

save Marcy. First of all, I don't need

to. Jesus has already saved her. But

number two, I I'm not the one who is

able to cleanse her. Instead, what I am

able to do by God's design is that it

should be my goal to show her

the way of Christ. It should be my goal

to show her the love of Christ, by the

way, by the way I speak to her, by the

way serve her and care for her so that

she can see Jesus in me.

That is God's design. You wonder why so

many women struggle very often with

their husband and his example. Very

often it's because he is not laying down

his life

for his wife.

He's stronger than she is.

He's physically stronger.

He's bigger. society and everything else

pivots toward him [clears throat]

in many many different ways. And so this

when a husband is not acting as Christ

toward his wife, this does nothing but

create a burr

in her heart. And as we see, go back and

read Genesis. Go back to Genesis chapter

Genesis 3 · chapter mention

3 and see what God said would happen.

What God said would happen is, okay,

because you all have chosen the way of

sin, there's there's going to be several

consequences here. One of them is you're

going to have to work by the sweat of

your brow to survive.

And there's going to be strife

in your life. And listen to this. Your

desire, women, your desire is going to

be to rule over your husband, but you

won't.

That's that's part of the picture that

is here. So, we see this conflict. It's

baked into the fall. It's baked into our

human condition that we so desperately

need redemption from. And that's what

God does. He gives us the redemption

through Jesus Christ. He gives us the

plan of how to be saved from our sin,

how to be given a new heart and a new

mind. And listen, we read it a few

minutes ago from Ezekiel. and the will

to obey. Now, you may not feel like

that's always there. Sometimes you feel

like, well, I just fail at that and I'm

I'm not going to Listen, the fact of the

matter is is that that's the reason

Jesus died on the cross was so that you

could be saved from your sin. And that

doesn't mean just hellfire. It means you

can be saved from doing the things that

are against the heart of God and against

the heart of your wife and against the

heart of your husband.

He saved you to give you the power to

obey.

And this is another area of theology

that has very often been neglected.

That Christians see themselves as

victims. Well, I just can't help it.

It's just what I do. I have an anger

problem or I have a a hatred problem or

I I can't forgive or I or I, you know,

whatever it is. I I can't seem to pull

it together. No. Listen,

all of the answers are yes and amen

through Jesus Christ.

>> He is the one who gives us the strength

to obey.

Notice here with me, letter C there. It

means a husband is to sacrifice himself

for the welfare of his wife. Look at

Ephesians chapter 5 and verse 25.

Ephesians 5 · chapter mention

Husbands,

love your wives as Christ loved the

church and gave himself up for her, that

he may sanctify her, having cleansed her

by the washing of the water with the

word. Verse 27, so that he might present

the church to himself in splendor

without spot or wrinkle or any such

thing, that she might be holy and blame,

holy and without blemish. Now, if you

would put a big circle around those

passages below that because that's

probably what you ought to do this week

for homework. And notice that I made

bold the first one. What is the first

one that is there?

>> First Peter what

>> three, right? That's that's our passage

that is next for us. And so, but it's

also in numerous other places. These

aren't the only ones, but this is this

is where the picture is. Is that

husbands are to love their wives as

Christ loved the church. Flip your page

over and let's go to letter D. So the

implication is that husbands are to do

that. The implication letter D, it means

this. A covenant marriage is this. A

covenant relationship with Christ is

this. It means a wife is to submit

herself to her husband's leadership so

long as she is not abused or forced to

dishonor the Lord. So you you don't

submit when your husband is calling you

to do the wrong thing, the something

that is um grossly evil and wrong in the

sight of God or or that or if he is

abusing you. And that's part of what

we'll have to work through. We'll have

to talk about what is abuse, what is not

abuse, what what what do you do in those

situations. We're not saying that

there's a blind submission.

If he's going to beat you, let him beat

you. Absolutely not.

But notice here with me that the

scripture clearly over and over again

shows that the roles and the order

within the home is part of this. And

it's patterned, listen, it's patterned

after the church with Christ.

It's patterned after the church with

Christ. Look at Ephesians 5 22. Wives,

submit to your own husbands as to the

Lord, saying, So as you submit to the

Lord, you also submit to the authority

of your husband. Verse 23, for the

husband is head of the wife, even as

Christ is the head of the church, his

body, and is himself its savior. Now,

this isn't saying your husband is your

savior. It's simply showing the order of

this. It's simply showing that the whole

church, including your husband, is to

submit to Christ. Right? And so, as we

see this, we work out what God's

glorious plan is. Look at verse 24. Now,

as the church submits to Christ, so also

wives should submit in everything to

their husbands. You say, why does it

have to say in everything? What does

that mean? Okay, that's going to be for

the next few weeks. We're we're going to

look at that. We're not done with this.

We're going to circle back on that, but

we're we're going to see what how does

this work? How can this really be

healthy? How can it how can Sheridan

Hills have a bunch of marriages in the

years to come that are really healthy,

really honoring Christ where the

husbands are doing what they're supposed

to be doing and where the wives are

doing what they're supposed to be doing.

We're going to look at that and we're

going to we're taking swings at that.

We're going to strive. We're not just

going to go with the culture. We're

going to seek to let God's word and his

spirit change us so that our lives are

truly representative of his design and

his plan. Now again, put a big circle

around those passages underneath

Ephesians chapter 5. What is the first

Ephesians 5 · chapter mention

one you notice there?

>> 1 Peter 3. So we'll be circling back on

that. But we also see it in Colossians

3, Titus 2, 1 Corinthians 11. So,

husbands, love your wives as Christ

loved the church. Wives, submit to your

husbands as the church submits to

Christ. You know, there's a little bit

of a problem with this in this day and

time on this regard for our

understanding. By the way,

part of the reason that doesn't work in

our thinking, it works perfectly in

reality, but in our false thinking,

sometimes we go, "Well, wait a minute.

What does that even mean? Submit as the

as the church submits to Christ." You

know what part of the problem is? A lot

of churches don't submit to Christ.

A lot of churches

are doing their own thing. They do their

own thing in Jesus' name.

They love to put the logo of Jesus on

the advertisement and they love to put

the logo of Jesus and they love to

mention Jesus, but they ultimately are

in pursuit either in their dead

fundamentalism

or in their wild charismania or

prosperity gospel. There's a lot of

different ways you can do it. There's a

lot of different ways that you can still

ignore Christ

in the name of Jesus.

Sounds strange, but we live in a world

where that is often the case. And may

that not be true of our hearts. May

Christ truly be the Lord of this church.

May Christ be the head of this church.

May his word dictate our hearts, not our

own desires. and not our culture around

us. Amen.

>> That was a weak amen.

>> Letter E.

It means that just as baptism and the

Lord's supper pastor, why in the world

are you bringing up baptism? Well,

you're going to see. It means that just

as baptism and the Lord's supper are

continual reminders of the church being

what? Married to Christ. So covenant

marriage between a husband and a wife

requires constant

remembrance

and renewal.

>> Amen.

>> We have to remember this. Now when we

look at our spiritual lives, there's

many many many many times that God is

saying remember remember. Why? Because

in our fallenness, we forget things. And

the older we get, we forget more. I'm

like that. I have to ask the guys all

the time. Hey guys, remind me about

that. What's going on? I mean, you know,

have I already told you this? You know,

and you know, Pastor William, yes, you

already told me that. Okay, good. All

right.

We forget, right?

God knows that about us. You can be 25

years old and forget some of the most

important things. And that's why God

remember reminds us first thing that we

see here is baptism.

God gives the people of God the church

of God baptism. It recognizes

someone personally coming into covenant

with Christ.

Today when Gena and when Kaden were

baptized, this is the official statement

of them publicly saying we are now with

Christ. We are not on our own. We we

have believed upon Christ and he has

saved us from our sins. We are now in

eternal life with Christ as he has

designed. So it is the recognition of

that. Look at Romans 6 3-4. Do you not

know that all of us who have been

baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized

into his death? We were buried therefore

with him by baptism into death in order

that just as Christ was raised from the

dead by the glory of the father,

underline it, we too may walk in newness

of life. He makes all things new. That's

exactly what Caden chose uh a verse to

share with you. 1 Corinthians 5:17. If

any man be in Christ, he is a new

creation. Behold, old things have passed

away. All things have become new. That

is the picture. That's the picture of

baptism. So, baptism recognizes that.

Now, get this. This is so cool. This is

similar to a wedding for a married

couple.

Do you get what I'm saying?

>> Like baptism represents the beginning of

your relationship with Christ. Listen,

a wedding that maybe happens right here

at this altar where Marcy and I got

married and where many of you got

married. A wedding represents your

beginning of your covenant relationship

with your spouse.

And so baptism is a picture of that

grander relationship that we have. And

now we see the wedding. Now what else is

here? The Lord's supper.

[sighs] It's interesting that the Lord's

supper fills it in. Fill it in reminds

us of our covenant relationship with

Jesus.

This is why we are told to observe the

Lord's supper. We are told to remember

what Christ has done. And so very often,

at least once a month, we set this table

before us. And the table that the Lord

has called believers to remember, to

obey um him in observing the Lord's

supper is to remind you of what he did

for you in order to bring you into

covenant relationship with him. So

baptism is at the beginning of your

relationship with Christ. The Lord's

supper continues with you through the

rest of your life as you gather together

with the body of Christ. And we remember

what Jesus did to bring us into

relationship with him.

And so that's why we don't partake of

the Lord's supper regarding sin in our

heart. Holding on to sin in our heart.

We confess that. We we use it as a time

to to do an inspection in our heart. You

should never come to the table of the

Lord regarding sin. Having unconfessed

sin in your heart,

that brings great danger upon your life

to insult Christ in that way. You say,

"Well, then I guess I can't observe the

Lord's supper." Well, that's one option.

A better option is what?

repent of your sin,

>> which is far better for you anyway.

But if you won't repent of your sin and

you continue with that, then you need to

go look at First John that says, "Anyone

who continues to practice sin is of the

devil

because the devil is sin from the

beginning."

And so, we have to really evaluate, are

we really a Christian? If we're really a

Christian, we're called to walk in the

way of Christ. And one of the ways that

he gives us to continue to walk in the

way of Christ is the Lord's table. The

Lord's table reminds us of the sacrifice

that was made so we can be in awe of

that and remember it and come, listen,

and come to love Christ more than we

love porn. Come to love Christ more than

we love lying. Come to love Christ more

than we love selfishness.

Come to love Christ more than we love

anything else. Because when we love him

more, then we are going to come to hate

the sin that our flesh gravitates to.

And so the Lord's supper reminds us of

this. Look at 1 Corinthians 11 23 and

24. For I received from the Lord what I

also delivered to you, that the Lord

Jesus on the night when he was betrayed,

so this is the Passover night, he's

observing Passover with the with his

disciples.

and and he he just totally blows them

away with this in verse 24. And when he

had given thanks, he brokeen and said,

"This is my body which is for you." So

he's picturing what's about to happen.

And then what does he say? Read it out

loud. Do this in remembrance of me. And

then after he had broken the bread,

verse 25, in the same way also he took

the cup after supper, saying, "This cup

is the," Underline it, new covenant in

my blood. And what does he say? Read it

out loud with me. Do this as often as

you drink it in remembrance of me.

This is the plan that God has to help

you listen to help you stay married to

him, to help you stay faithful to him.

The Lord's table can help you. You know

what I mean? If you're not going to be

here on any Sunday, listen, you need to

be deathly ill in order to miss the

Lord's table.

You ought to be here and you ought to

have your heart ready. You ought to

prepare your heart to remember the

Lord's table. And if you're struggling

with that, you ought to call somebody

that week ahead of it and say, "You know

what? I'm struggling with something. I'm

struggling with something in my heart

that's against the Lord, and I need you

to pray with me. Maybe you need to maybe

you need to reach out to someone. But

listen, do not neglect being right with

God and remembering his table."

Well, now in a similar way, in a similar

way, look at this on your outline.

This is similar to a renewal, a

remembrance of your marriage covenant.

This is the same thing for a husband and

a wife that they need to remember the

marriage covenant. Part of you, some of

you are really struggling in your

relationship with each other because you

keep forgetting. You let the busyiness

of life run you from thing to thing to

thing, from trouble to trouble to

trouble, and you miss his goodness in

this. It could be a daily walk. It could

be a regular date night. Sound good? A

planned TOC that means a talk. That's a

time of open communication. A vowel

renewal.

A husband and a wife are sinners. They

also need to be repenters.

And they need to be forgivers.

As Christians are expected to grow and

mature in their relationship with

Christ, so they must grow and mature in

their love and marriage to one another.

This is God's plan

um that you would grow in your marriage.

Letter F, notice this. One flesh union.

One flesh union by design is exclusively

covenantal. And that means it's not

casual or open.

God made us sexually. And this is for a

reason. And there's beauty in that. It's

it's very significant in that. Not only

for procreation, but for relationship.

Look at this. Exodus 20:14. Would you

Exodus 20:14

read it out loud? Exodus 20:14. Read it

Exodus 20:14

out loud.

>> What is that? That's one of the ten

commandments.

Thou shalt not, you shall not commit

adultery. What about Hebrews 13:4? Let

Hebrews 13:4

the marriage be held, let marriage be

held in honor among all. Let the

marriage bed be undefiled, for God will

judge the sexually immoral and the

adulterous. Flip over. Look at 1

Corinthians 6.

Flee from sexual immorality. Every other

son of every other sin a man commit can

commit is outside his body. But he who

sins sexually sins against his own body.

Do you not know that your body is a

temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you,

whom you have received from God? You are

not your own. You were bought with a

price.

Therefore, glorify God with your body.

Fill it in. God's covenant with Israel

did not tolerate worshiping other gods.

He would not allow.

And and when they did, he called them an

adulterous generation.

How about this? A marriage covenant does

not tolerate other lovers sexually or

emotionally.

That is that is completely outside the

bounds. Just like God doesn't want

Israel worshiping other gods, God has

designed it for us to expect that our

spouse and that we ourselves would be

saved only for them, not not sexually or

emotionally, either one. Letter G. A

covenantal marriage displays the gospel

of committed love. A covenantal marriage

displays the gospel of committed love,

forgiveness,

and mission to the world.

So so desperate that so desperately

needs to see it. So the idea is the

world is desperate for real love and

they need to see it in the lives of

God's people. Um this is the the picture

of what he has g given us. So covenantal

marriage displays

this gospel of it displays forgiveness

because we're sinners. We sin against

each other. And look at this. The

mission to the world. We proclaim

Christ. Look at Mark 10 and verse 45.

Look what it says. For even the son of

man came not to be served but to what?

>> To serve and to give his life as a

ransom for many. Okay. So, very quickly,

how does this help us? How do these

implications help us? What can we do

with what we've heard? And we're going

to we're going to look at more things

specifically

um as it relates to First Peter in the

coming weeks. But notice this with me.

How what do we do with all of this, the

last two sermons

to the long-ch Christian? So, there's

people in this room that have not

surrendered to Christ. You haven't yet

become a Christian. You've been thinking

about it. you've been learning. Maybe

you're like Kaden or Gena. You kind of

thought you were, but then you realized

you're not. Notice this.

Number one, to the non-Christians, see

that God's word is intricate. It's

cohesive, and it's sensical. It makes

sense. It deals very honestly with the

greatest issues in life. If you ask him

to,

God will speak to you through his word.

That's the first thing that I want you

to see. that if you will ask God to

speak to you, he will begin to speak to

you through his word. And then number

two, see that Christ calls you into a

underline it covenant relationship with

him. He calls you to that. And how do

you come to that? Through seeing his

total self-sacrifice

for you on the cross. He died so you can

live forever.

Come to him in repentance and faith. Ask

him to cleanse you and save you. Maybe

you've never seen it in black and white

what you need to do personally. This is

where it all begins. And that's the

greatest thing that you can do if you

want to have a marriage um either now or

someday that is right is to come to

Christ. To the Christian, here's some

big things. Number one, see that the

really big marriage is not between man

and a man and a woman, but between God

and his people. That's the really big

one. That's where all this is headed

headed. God gave us earthly marriage

because we are heading to a wedding.

That's what we're doing. We are heading

to a wedding.

And you can read Revelation chapter 19

Revelation 19 · chapter mention

and see that as we've touched on

already. So, you need to recognize

that's what all this means. Number two,

see that God calls us to be underline it

covenant in a call calls us to a

covenanteping love relationship with

him. That changes our identity. We are

no longer merely ourselves, but we are

now in him.

And that's very significant

because it's only in being in him that

we can properly be

one with our spouse.

When we are in him and we're growing in

that relationship, then we can be in

proper relationship with our spouse.

Look at number three.

Embrace

God's design

for marriage and reject the world's

distortion

of marriage.

Embrace God's design for marriage and

reject the world's distortion for

marriage. I pray that you will do just

that. Would you stand with me for

prayer?

That last one, embrace God's design.

>> And reject the world's distortion.

>> We're going to look at that over the

next few weeks.

>> We're going to look at how do we

practically do that. How do we live that

out?

And how do we allow Christ to be all

that he's called us to be?

Father in heaven, I thank you for your

goodness. Thank you for your grace.

I do pray that you would rule and reign

over our hearts. I pray that we would

live out your truth.

And Father, I pray that we would be

exactly what Christ has called us to be.

I pray that we would see the great

marriage of heaven

and that that marriage would inspire our

earthly marriages in Christ.

In Jesus name we pray. Amen.