Faith, Doubt, and Diligence at New Years Eve 2023

Good morning, everyone.

As we come to the end of the Christmas season with the New Year right around the corner,

I felt it would be appropriate to talk this morning about faith, doubt, and diligence

in the coming year.

We hear so often of heroes of the Christian faith who possessed incredible and unshakable

faith.

Missionaries and apostles who leave everything behind and walk solely by faith.

Martyrs who pay the ultimate price and give up their lives with a faith that doesn't waver

in the face of vulgar, humiliating pain, suffering, and death.

Faith is a beautiful and glorious virtue, but its counterpart, doubt, can fill us with the

same scope and depth of emotion in the opposite direction.

Whereas a powerful, trusting faith can give the world purpose, meaning, and fill you with

a spirit of rejoicing in all things, a powerful doubt shakes the rickety floor beneath your

feet, threatening to throw you from a secure place into an infinite, dark, and foreboding

death.

It can be terrifying.

And yet, doubt, in so many Christian circles, is seen simply as something you experience before

you're saved.

It's something that happens perhaps while you're in the process of coming to Christ, but once

you're saved, it doesn't come up anymore.

After all, once saved, always saved.

There's a perception that a good Christian simply doesn't struggle with things like doubt.

But that can be a very harmful perception, indeed.

It can make you feel like you're the only one who struggles with doubt.

That there's something wrong with you, and it's something to be ashamed of.

Or worse, something to be frightened of.

So perhaps you try your best to ignore it, or bury it, or hide it.

But such methods never do anything to actually solve doubt.

That doubt is a flaming barbed arrow shot from the evil one.

It sticks in you, and it digs deep, and it hurts to wrestle with it, and you can't seem

to pull it out.

Covering it up, ignoring it, hiding it.

It makes sense at the time, but it's such an irrational and animalistic response.

How often do terrible wounds get better from being ignored?

For me, personally, I've witnessed and experienced things in my life that absolutely defy any rational

explanation.

I've been given mountains of evidence, and sometimes feel God so close in my life.

Yet, I think I've struggled more with doubt than any Christian that I've ever met.

I don't know if that's actually true, but it certainly feels that way sometimes.

Sometimes it almost even seems seasonal.

Doubt in the power of God.

Doubt in the sacrifice of our Savior.

Doubt in the inerrancy of Scripture.

Doubt if we've ever been saved at all.

Doubt in the law.

It's not something that I want to admit, but I think it's important for us to do so.

Because there's times I've felt there must be something wrong with me.

Because other Christians seem to believe just so effortlessly.

But I think a lot more of us struggle with doubt than we're willing to admit.

Of course, some people truly do have an ironclad faith in which they rest assured in Christ and never struggle with doubt in their walk.

And that is a wonderful, amazing gift.

Christ even draws special attention to those who believe with that strength and purity and trust and humility of a child that they will inherit the kingdom of heaven.

But that isn't something that everyone possesses.

And so often doubt is associated with detractors of God.

However, people who are opposed to God aren't the only ones who doubt Him.

Because when we go to the Bible and we look through Scripture, it is filled with individuals who are called by God directly.

Only to be filled with doubt and fear.

Peter, apostle of Jesus Christ, the rock of the early church, was walking on water with Jesus Christ.

Physically, standing right in front of him.

And we read that Peter's fear led him to doubt.

And he started to sin.

In Judges 6, we read the account of Gideon.

The angel of the Lord appears to Gideon.

And the angel of the Lord is often used to refer to the pre-incarnate Christ in the Old Testament.

Gideon only has six lines in Judges 6.

And it's nothing but doubt.

Gideon first says,

When told he's going to be an instrument of salvation, Gideon says,

Please, Lord, how can I save Israel?

Behold, my clan is the weakest in Manasseh, and I am the least in my father's house.

Followed by,

If I have now found favor in your eyes, then show me a sign that it is you who speak with me.

Please do not depart from here until I come to you and bring out my present and set it before you.

And when he sees physical proof, Gideon says,

Alas, O Lord God, for now I have seen the angel of the Lord face to face.

And then upon receiving instruction from God, we read Gideon took ten of his servants and did as the Lord told him.

But because he was too afraid of his family and the men of his town, he did it by night.

Then, still within the same chapter, Gideon says to God,

If you will save Israel by my hand, as you have said,

Behold, I am laying a fleece of wool on the threshing floor.

If there is dew on the fleece alone, and it is dry on all the ground,

then I shall know that you will save Israel by my hand, as you have said.

And when that was done, Gideon said to God,

Let not your anger burn against me.

Let me speak just once more.

Please let me test just once more with the fleece.

Please let it be dry on the fleece only, and on all the ground.

Let there be dew.

God called Gideon a man of valor and said he found favor in him.

Yet every single response of Gideon's is riddled with doubt.

Often, when we struggle with doubt, we wish that we could receive signs the way Gideon or Peter did.

We want clear signs and obvious proof that doesn't require any faith.

We tell ourselves that if we could just receive some small, minor little sign,

not even necessarily a miracle, a small sign like maybe a bird coming through a window and landing on a sill at just the right moment,

that's all it would take.

But we're lying to ourselves.

This might sound like an excuse, but even if we could put God to such tests,

I don't think any amount of testing would ever satisfy us.

Gideon met an angel and struggled with doubt the same day.

Peter was looking directly at Christ and actively experiencing a miracle, and he doubted.

Thomas, who was a disciple of Christ, who likely performed miracles given to the disciples to do, like casting out demons,

but when the other disciples came to Thomas and told him Jesus rose from the dead, he doubted.

Unless I physically touch not just him in his wounds, I don't believe you.

Moses, the great patriarch, said, I can't go to Pharaoh.

I can't do that.

And of course, Jonah, when called upon by God, sprinted in the opposite direction.

So, okay, if heroes of the Old Testament and disciples of Jesus doubted,

maybe the problem then is that we're human.

Angels have God readily available and right in front of their face, constantly.

But all that does is shifts the goalposts.

Look at Satan.

How much more proof could an entity possibly need?

Yet he not only rebelled against God, but even in his defeat, he still leads a constant struggle.

Not only against God, but against God's creation.

And it isn't just Satan.

We read multiple times in Scripture that Satan wasn't cast out alone.

There were other angels that went with him.

Of course, once they were cast out, we don't really refer to them as angels anymore.

We refer to them as demons.

And we don't think of demons as once being angels in heaven or servants of God.

One of my favorite depictions of Satan is a painting of a beautiful angel sitting down.

And he's holding his own hand and is just brimming with anger.

And it's a wonderful contrast to God touching Adam's finger in Michelangelo's famous Sistine Chapel painting.

So, what then is the point?

If doubt isn't based on physiology as humans, and it isn't based on the amount of evidence we've received,

what then causes us to doubt?

It's emotion.

It's desire.

Satan has more evidence than any human could ever have.

But Satan wants to be in charge.

So, the evidence doesn't matter.

When the waves and the wind roared around Peter, Jesus was right in front of him.

But he was afraid.

So, the evidence didn't matter.

Gideon, chosen for being a man of valor to save Israel,

had just confirmed and tested that the God of Israel was on his side.

But when Gideon was afraid of the admonition of his own family,

the evidence didn't matter.

I have a bit of a lengthy quote here from C.S. Lewis's Mere Christianity

that I think explains this perfectly.

For example,

my reason is perfectly convinced by good evidence

that anesthetics do not smother me

and that properly trained surgeons do not start operating until I am unconscious.

But that does not alter the fact that when they have me down on the table

and clap their horrible mask over my face,

a mere childish panic begins inside me.

I start thinking I am going to choke

and I am afraid they will start cutting me up

before I am properly under.

In other words,

I lose my faith in anesthetics.

It is not reason that is taking away my faith.

On the contrary,

my faith is based on reason.

It is my imagination

and emotions.

The battle is between

faith and reason on one side

and emotion and imagination

on the other.

Lewis then goes on to say,

I am not asking anyone

to accept Christianity

if his best reasoning tells him

that the weight of the evidence

is against it.

That is not the point

at which faith comes in.

But supposing a man's reason

once decides that the weight of the evidence

is for it,

I can tell that man

what is going to happen to him

within the next few weeks.

There will come a moment

when there is bad news

or he is in trouble

or is living life

among a lot of people

who do not believe it

and all at once

his emotions will rise up

and carry out a sort of blitz

on his belief.

Or else there will come a moment

when he wants a woman

or wants to tell a lie

or feels very pleased

with himself

or sees a chance

of making a little money

in some way

that is not perfectly fair.

Some moment, in fact.

Hmm.

At which it would be

very convenient

if Christianity were not true.

And once again,

he wishes and desires

will carry out a blitz.

I am not talking

of moments

at which any new

real reasons

against Christianity turn up.

Those have to be faced

and that is a different matter.

I am talking about moments

where a mere mood

rises up against it.

Now faith,

in the sense

in which I am using

the word here,

is the art

of holding on to things

that your reason

has once accepted

in spite

of your changing moods.

For moods will change.

Whatever view

your reason takes,

I know that by experience.

Now that I am a Christian,

I do have moods

in which the whole thing

looks very improbable.

But when I was an atheist,

I had moods

in which Christianity

looked terribly probable.

This rebellion

of your moods

against your real self

is going to come anyway.

That is why faith

is such a necessary virtue.

Unless you teach your moods,

where they get off,

you can never be

either a sound Christian

or even a sound atheist,

but just a creature

dithering to and fro,

with its beliefs

really dependent

on the weather

and the state

of its digestion.

Consequentially,

one must train

the habit of faith.

The first step

is to recognize

the fact that

your moods change.

The next

is to make sure

that if you have

once accepted Christianity,

then some

of its main doctrines

shall deliberately

be held

before your mind

for some time

every day.

This is why

daily prayers

and religious reading

and churchgoing

are necessary parts

of the Christian life.

We have to be

continually reminded

of what we believe.

Neither this belief

nor any other

will automatically

remain alive

in our mind.

It must be fed.

And as a matter

of fact,

if you examined

a hundred people

who had lost

their faith

in Christianity,

I wonder

how many of them

would turn out

to have been reasoned

out of it

by honest argument.

Do not most people

simply drift away?

So that ultimately

brings us

to the point

of today's message.

What do we do

when we fall

into doubt?

Thankfully,

the answer

is quite simple.

But simple

and easy

aren't always

the same thing.

If you find yourself

racked

with doubt,

then you need

to pray.

You need

to read Scripture.

You need to wrestle

with that doubt

and cross-examine it.

Is that doubt

truly genuine?

or is it just

that there's

something in your life

that you want

that Christianity

is stopping you

from having?

Is there an emotion

that threatens

to consume you

like despair

or depression

and in that moment

seems so comforting

and alluring

to sink into?

Now,

Scripture

and prayer

are probably

the last thing

anyone's going

to want

when they're

dead.

But,

that's simply

when they need

it the most.

If you physically

feel weak

and tired

and unwell

all of the time,

you know

that what you

need to do

is to start

eating healthy

and start getting

regular

physical exercise.

exercise.

But,

I am sure

we've all

experienced that,

haven't we?

When you drag

yourself back

into a physically

healthy routine

from a long absence?

Getting on the

treadmill for the

first time in months

is just agony.

Our emotions

start blitzing us

with,

why are you doing

this?

This is foolishness.

We're not running

away from anyone.

You just need

to lie down

and have some

snacks.

Why then

should it be

any different

when we crack

open a Bible

in the midst

of doubt?

Your emotions

will start

flailing

just the same

way with all

the usual

attacks

screaming at you.

It's harder

since faith

seems to be

in the realm

of the mind

so it feels

that those

emotions have

more weight

than they should.

If anything,

the gym is

ten times easier

since you can

just turn on

music,

try and turn

off your brain

and do the

exercises

and try not

to think.

Scripture,

however,

actively

encourages

thinking

and dwelling

on difficult

concepts.

It's mental

instead of

physical,

which is

exactly where

the attacks

seem to be

coming from.

To make

matters worse,

hiding doubt

seems much

easier than

hiding physical

weakness.

weakness.

You can

disguise

doubt for

years,

but a

growing waistline

less so.

But the

horrible truth

is that

that's a

lie.

When you're

struggling with

doubt,

people notice.

When your

relationship with

God feels

thin and you

despair of

what once

gave you

such strength

and hope,

people notice.

it's not as

hidden as

you might

think.

I've had

atheist

friends in

my youth

have a

borderline

intervention

with me

when I

was in

my teenage

years and

struggling

with doubt.

We were

driving someplace

and they

both turned

around and

said,

Matt,

we notice

you don't

pray as

much as

you used

to.

We also

notice that

your cousin

more is

is everything

all right?

Are you doing

okay?

I thought

I had

hidden it

perfectly fine,

but even

people outside

the Christian

sphere can

pick up on

it, how

much more

so than

our brothers

and sisters

in Christ.

It can be

frightening to

wrestle with

doubt or to

talk about it

with someone

you trust because

it can feel

that speaking

it out loud

manifests it

and makes

that doubt

somehow real.

It's much

easier to

bury your head

in the sand

and pretend

you're not

afflicted by it.

But we all

know how

hiding a flaw

works out.

Whether it's

a flaw in

the foundation

of a building

that you

tried painting

over or

a burning

arrow that's

deep and

dug within

your flesh

from the

evil one,

covering it

up never,

ever solves

the problem.

Sometimes it

helps to have

someone to

talk about it

with, but

ultimately it's

your own

unique relationship

between God

and you.

Christianity

doesn't have

a distant

and unknowable

God, a

shrouded entity

spoken to

only by a

sacred priesthood.

No.

Jesus is

our personal

Savior.

And we have

to call on

him, speak

to him, pray

to him.

him.

We have to

rely on him

and trust

him, even

if we can't

see him or

touch his

side.

And if you

want proof,

that proof

does exist.

We're told

not to put

God to the

test like the

Israelites did

at Massa or

how Satan

tempted Christ

in the desert.

Sorry.

But what if

I told you

that God

invites us

to test

him?

When the

Israelites, the

Pharisees, or

Satan himself

are testing

God, they're

complaining,

they're mistrusting,

they're probing

for weaknesses,

and we're told

that's wrong.

But there's a

kind of test

that we're

encouraged to

partake in.

And it's a

test to taste

and see

that God

is good.

less of a

test, perhaps,

and more

of an

invitation.

In Psalm

34, we

read in

verses 8-10,

O taste

and see

that the

Lord is

good.

Blessed is

the man

who takes

refuge in

him.

O fear

the Lord,

you saints,

for those

who fear

him have

no lack.

The young

lion suffers

hunger and

want, but

those who

seek the

Lord lack

no good

thing.

And then

Isaiah 55,

we read in

verses 1-3,

Come,

everyone who

thirsts,

come to the

waters,

and he who

has no money,

come, buy

and eat,

come, buy

wine and

milk, without

money and

without price.

Why do you

spend your

money on that

which is not

bread, and

your labor for

that which does

not satisfy?

Listen

diligently to me,

and eat what

is good, and

delight yourself

in rich food.

Incline your

ear and

come to me,

hear that

your soul

may live,

and I will

make with you

an everlasting

covenant, my

steadfast and

sure love

for David.

God

won't

submit

himself to

our

whims.

God

will

be

subject to

being

confined and

placed under

a microscope

and have

experiments

conducted on

him if

such a thing

were even

possible for

an entity so

beyond our

understanding as

mortal creatures.

God

although we

see times in

scripture, like

with Peter,

Thomas, and

Gideon, where

God directly

answers doubters

with physical

evidence, that

isn't the way he

answers for us, or

at least it is

very, very

rarely.

And why?

Why has God

chosen that to

be the way that

this universe

works?

Why is that the

way he set our

relationship with

him to be?

I don't

know.

I suspect

that it has

something to

do with the

fact that we've

been given

rational minds

and we're

expected to

use them.

But I know

that Jesus

is the

truth, the

way, and

the life.

And it is

only through

him that we

come to the

Father.

And I know

that faith

changes every

single aspect

of your life.

internally, you

know there's a

plan.

You might not

always know what

the plan is, but

the chaos that

exists around you

is not empty

and random.

It often feels

that way,

particularly when

it comes to

seemingly senseless

tragedy and

disease.

But know that

God is in

control of all

things.

things.

And we

believe that not

only is God in

control of all

things, but that

he works all

things for the

good of those

who believe.

And that's a

difficult passage

to understand.

But when we put

it into practice,

it changes your

entire perspective.

you have to

let go of your

pride and trust

in something

greater than

yourself.

Humans have a

tendency to

only see what

we're looking

for.

If you need a

hammer, then

your eyes

scanning the

room, you're

scanning for any

object that can

be used as a

hammer.

If you have a

political group

that you despise,

then people will

look online every

single day,

searching to be

outraged, to

find new sources

for their

self-righteous

indignation.

Satan and

detractors of

Christ look

eagerly at

Christians for

weaknesses, flaws,

and hypocrisy.

We see what we

want to see.

Test them that

God is good.

I'm not saying

blind yourself in

ignorance.

I'm saying you

stop blinding

yourself.

To blessing.

Look instead

towards Christ

and you will

see him.

Look towards

Jesus and

trust him when

he says,

Come to me,

all you who

are weary and

burdened, and I

will give you

rest.

Take my yoke upon

you and learn

from me, for I

am gentle and

humble in heart,

and you will find

rest for your

souls, for my

yoke is easy and

my burden light.

God, the weight

of life can be

crushing.

But as the

famous hymn says,

if we turn our

eyes upon Jesus,

the things of

earth will grow

strangely dim.

Look full in that

wonderful face in

the light of glory

and grace.

Taste and see

that the Lord is

good.

When we walk in

faith, it makes

us more optimistic.

We aren't

looking at the

blazing furnace

around us, but

instead at the

gold that is

going to be

produced by the

refiner's fire.

We need to know

that we aren't

perfect and there

is dross in all

of us that needs

to be consumed.

James 1 reads,

Count it all joy,

my brothers, when

you meet trials of

various kinds, for

you know that the

testing of your

faith produces

steadfastness, and

let steadfastness

have its full

effect, that you

may be perfect and

complete, lacking in

nothing.

If any of you

lacks wisdom, let

him ask God, who

gives generously to

all without a

reproach, and it

will be given to

him.

But let him ask in

faith, with no

doubting, for the

one who doubts is

like a wave of the

sea that is driven

and tossed by the

wind, for that

person must not

suppose he will

receive anything

from the Lord, for

he is double-minded

of mind, unstable in

all his ways.

Sometimes there are

impurities in your

life that need to be

consumed, and that

consumption will be

painful, and we

aren't static

creatures.

We make mistakes,

often the same

mistakes, over and

over and over

again, just like the

Israelites.

Sometimes it seems

that we're just

building the dross

back up.

But doesn't that

just track with

every other

discipline in our

life?

If you're caught in

a riptide, you're

either making progress

towards the shore, or

you're being dragged

further out.

there's no middle

ground.

If you're maintaining

a garden, how

quickly can one

season of neglect

allow it to be

overgrown by weeds

that choke out

flowers and

vegetables?

If you're training

physically, how

much does even

one month of not

doing cardio make

you feel like you've

lost all the

stamina you built

on?

So when you feel

the weight of

doubt, do not

let Satan tempt

you to despair.

Remind yourself

that your faith

is based on

reason, not

emotion.

Turn instead

to Christ.

Pray and

seek your

Savior

earnestly.

Get back in

that spiritual

garden, or

gym, or

whichever metaphor

you prefer, and

get back at

it.

It's easier to

see the result in

the garden or in

the gym after a

couple of months

of hard work, but

those results exist

for your prayer

life as well.

Studies have

shown that even

just 11 minutes of

prayer a day over

the course of 8

weeks makes such

a noticeable

impact on your

brain that the

shape is actually

changed, and they

can see it during

an MRI scan.

According to

scientific studies,

regular prayer

increases the

size of the

prefrontal cortex

and posterior

cingulate cortex,

which is the

mid-front and

back portions of

the brain.

It turns out that

those areas of the

brain are responsible

for self-reflection

and for controlling

emotion.

And we have a

additional studies

that show, clear

as day, that

prayer and

meditation are

highly effective

in lowering our

reactivity to

traumatic and

negative events.

Because prayer

focuses our

thoughts outside

of ourselves.

And just as when

a physical disaster

strikes, and you'll

be glad you're

physically in good

shape, or that

your garden is

yielding a good

crop, so too

does your prayer

life serve as a

bastion against

the darkness of

this world.

Because during

stress and

trauma, our

limbic system

becomes hyperactivated,

which forces us

to freeze and

throws us into a

high-octane

fight-or-flight

mode.

It shuts down

our executive

functioning and

prevents us from

thinking clearly,

which is why we

make poor decisions,

or act in

self-destructive

ways, when we're

afraid or

stressed out.

The part of the

brain that's able

to override that,

however, and

regain control and

rein in that

chaos, is the

part that grows in

response to

regular prayer.

But you need to

train it.

Just like a

firefighter needs to

daily hit the

weight bench so

that he has the

strength to lift a

burning beam off

of someone when

the need arises,

you need to hit

your knees in

prayer diligently

and daily.

It makes a

real physical

change.

And when

trauma and

trial come,

and you

withstand it

better than the

unbelievers around

you, that is

when you'll have

the opportunity,

as Peter speaks

in 1 Peter 3

15, always be

prepared to give

an answer to

everyone who

asks you for

the reason for

the hope that

you have.

But do this

with gentleness

and respect.

Let's come

together now in

prayer.

God, help us

to be confident

in you in the

coming week.

Help us to

taste and see

that you are

good throughout

this new year,

Lord.

though the

world around

us rages

like a storm

with shouts

of war and

famine and

plague.

Help us to

be diligent

in coming to

you daily,

that we might

be filled with

peace, knowing

that we are not

of this world,

that we are

your children,

and that your

love surrounds

us and guides

us.

Help us to

freely give to

others the love

and forgiveness

and compassion

that you have

freely given

us, and

build in us

the kind of

faith that will

throw the devil's

mountains into

the sea.

In Jesus' name

we pray.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.