Desire Paths - Food w/Scott McConnell

Good morning. That's like a delayed response.

There we go. Good morning. There we go. We got

a little song back. I love it. This morning,

the two minutes for one question was, if you

could only eat at one restaurant the rest of

your life, where would you eat? So I'd love to

hear some answers. Pizza Ranch. I like it because

you get a good variety. Yeah, I heard, what was

that? Oh, Machine Shed. Yes, they've got a pretty

big menu as well. So that goes along with that

idea. One joke answer I thought of was Cheesecake

Factory because they always have that 20 -page

menu. So they've got the long menu. How about

one more? Lagos? Oh. And what's your maiden name,

please? Lago Marcino. I love it, which is just

an amazing name by itself. I love that name.

I'm adjusting right now, and I'll share that

because I... Recently had an eye procedure so

that I had contacts implanted into my eyes. My

retinas were too thin for LASIK. Thin retinas

is something I live with. I never knew I had

it the first 38 years of my life, but now that

I do know, I'm going to ride that out. So one

thing about it is that when there's a bright

light, there's a ring. like around the contact

that I see. And so as I'm sitting up here today,

there's a big ring in my eye for every single

light pointing at me. So there's like six rings

surrounding me right now, which I'll adapt to,

but it is something to adapt to for sure. This

morning, we've been talking about, thank you,

that does help a lot. This morning, In this series,

we've been talking about desire paths. And I

love this visual. And I've been thinking about

it a lot, even when I'm not at church. And what

it shows, if you follow the three times four

is 12. The paths, the first one shows a straight

path going through like a park. And then the

next one shows that. People create a path themselves

to get to the path from the corner a little bit

shorter. A lot of times you'll see a little side

path that comes through. And then you can see

that someone put in a bench to try to avoid people

from taking that side path. But then people just

took a path around the bench. And then a few

of them are blocked there in the middle. But

we can see down there in the bottom row. Then

they put in a hedge. And people walked through

the hedge. And so then they put in another sidewalk

to try to say, okay, we'll just go with it. We'll

put another sidewalk in. And then what do people

start doing in the last one? They start making

a little path from one side of the corner to

the other side of the corner so that they could

cut through there. So we do that with our own

desires. There are different paths that are set

in place, but we tend to work around the paths.

that are set in place to make our own paths.

And we're reminded through this series that the

paths that sometimes we make for ourselves aren't

the best paths to take. Is that fair, Pastor

Greg, by summarizing that well enough? All right.

Did you create that graphic? Kind of? Okay. Okay,

yeah, Pastor Greg does a lot of our graphics,

and I think he does an awesome job. They really

tie together our series and things. All right,

everybody take a drink break. I have quite a

bit of dry mouth, too. So I take lots of drink

breaks. Thin retinas, dry mouth, these are the

things I live with. My answer for the two minutes

to one question. And as we're looking at that

this morning, food, food is the desire path that

we're talking about. And this is somewhat of

a confession that for me, they just put in a

Panda Express on 53rd Street. And so in Davenport,

which is very close, it's three miles from my

house. I just coincidentally know that. And so

as I was preparing to preach about desire paths

and food, they opened up a Panda Express. It's

been open about 14 days. I haven't been there

in the double digits yet, but I'm getting close.

By the time it reaches 20 days, I probably will

have been. So I really enjoy it. So that's to

say I come to you humbly today. to talk about

desire paths and food. But nonetheless, it's

an important topic. And as we look at it, there's

a couple of things I want to point out is that

our relationship with food is not defined by

our body type. There are some of us who, I know

this is true for me, when I was in my early 20s,

I ate everything and anything that I wanted and

was a very skinny guy. I could get away with

anything. So just because I was a very skinny

guy doesn't mean that I had a healthy relationship

with food or that I followed good desire paths.

It just meant that my metabolism was really high.

As I've gotten older and as my body's changed,

my relationship with food has changed a lot.

with the exception of Panda Express. And that

I don't eat the same way I used to. I'm not able

to eat the same way I used to. But my body doesn't

still look the same way that it did in its 20s.

And I also feel like I'm grateful sometimes for

being a quadriplegic, for how that helps me to

approach messages differently. There are ways

that no matter what my relationship with food

is, there are parts of my body I can't control.

They're going to look ways differently than what

I want them to because I'm paralyzed from here

down atrophy sets in. So my ability to do sit

-ups is quite limited. My ability to do pull

-ups is quite limited. So it's important for

me to take care of my health and to exercise.

But I certainly recognize that preaching about

food and different things like that, it can often

be adapted right away to what do we look like?

What does the mirror remind us of? And that's

not the important connection for today. With

that being said, the title that we're looking

at is you don't have to be full to be happy.

We don't have to be full of food in order to

be happy. And the first place that I'm going

to look at for that is the Apostle Paul, who

wrote quite a bit of the New Testament. This

is the same Paul that you may have heard of that

saw a bright light and came to know Jesus in

that way. And on his way, the reason that he

was traveling is because he had a warrant to

arrest Christians. And so we start in Philippians

today. Chapter four, verses 12 through 13. I

believe I'm looking at the NIV. I didn't look

too closely. There are Bibles on your table,

probably. There are also blue Bibles in the wood

case in the front that you see when you walk

in. If you'd like to take one home with you.

A lot of us also have Bibles in our apps on our

phones. So you can look at those as well. And

again, we're looking at Philippians 4, 12 through

13. I'm going to read that for you now. And this

is after Paul, who used to arrest Christians,

is now getting used to being arrested for being

a Christian. And he wrote a letter and he said

this to his friends that he visited. He said,

I know what it is to be in need and I know what

it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret

of being content in any and every situation,

whether well fed or hungry, whether living in

plenty or in want. I can do all this through

him who gives me strength. So he's just not he's

not just talking about food here, but he is bringing

up food. is an example of we all know what it's

like to be hungry in different ways, but we've

probably all felt it before, and we've probably

all felt what it is to be full, too. I know what

it is like when I haven't had Panda Express and

what it feels like after, and they're two very

different feelings. But Paul experienced food

in different ways. Paul was a Jew. And there

were feasts throughout the year. So he loved,

he would have had favorite foods at each one

of these feasts where they celebrated by eating

well. He also, as a Jew, would have fasted regularly.

So he also knew what it was to choose not to

eat and to feel hunger. He also knew what it

was to feel hunger when it wasn't a choice. He

had been shipwrecked. He had been a prisoner.

He probably was a prisoner when he was writing

this. And he had also experienced it. And I had

fun thinking about this. There are some cultures

where when you visit, you are welcomed in people's

homes and you are expected to eat at each home

that you visit. And they're going to give you

the very best food that they have. And in some

cultures, this is extremely important. And so

if you were Paul and you were in a community

where you planted a church and poured into people

and you were coming back after you hadn't visited

for a long time, what would people want for you

to come and visit their home? And when you came

and visited their home, what would they want

you to do? Eat. And I'm sure that when Paul realized

I'm going back to Philippi again, he might start

to think about some of the food, about some of

the delicious food that different people made.

Some may have made something like brownies. Some

may have made something like his favorite spaghetti.

Different types of foods that we can imagine

in our minds that he would have enjoyed. He also

went places where he wasn't welcome. He also

went to preach at places he was run out of town.

No one would have been inviting him to come in

and eat. In fact, they may have even been hesitant

to sell him food in the market because he was

known in those places as an agitator, someone

who caused problems in the community. So he knew

what it was to be welcomed. He knew what it was

to not be welcomed. He knew what it was to be

hungry. He knew what it was to be full. Some

of my experiences that I've had, I had an interesting

experience after my injury where because of my

spinal cord injury, I was NPO, which for those

of you in the medical field, know that it means

you're not allowed to take anything by mouth.

You're not allowed to take medications. You're

not allowed to drink. You're not allowed to eat.

Now, if you would have told me before that, that

I would go for months without eating or drinking

anything, I would not have believed you. How

is that even possible? And how could you be happy

if you weren't able to do that? Especially if

you saw people eating and drinking around you.

I had to practice swallows thousands of times

with a speech therapist in my room before they

would even consider giving me a thickened liquid

to drink. And there's no way to have a thickened

liquid with the thickening agent that they use

in hospitals and have it be really good. It's

not especially pleasant stuff. And to even have

a chance to drink a thickened liquid, I had to

swallow barium on an x -ray machine for them

to see how it went down. And barium probably

doesn't sound pleasant. And it's another thing.

There's no chance you're going to drink barium

and it tastes good. So you have to swallow a

thick, chalky, not good tasting thing at all

on an x -ray to be able to even begin to... drink

again, let alone eat. And especially starting

out, my mouth was very dry. I ran fevers a lot

of the time. The only way I could even get someone

to wet my mouth was for them to dip a cube, an

almost spongy cube, in some water and wipe it

around in my mouth. And even then, I had to spit

out the liquid afterward to prove that I wasn't

swallowing it. And because of the orders that

I had, people knew that they could get in trouble

if I choked or aspirated. So if someone put too

much water on that sponge or let me suck too

much of it, it could be their job on the line.

And so it's an interesting relationship, right,

where I'm thirsty, I'm so thirsty, I want something

to drink, but I know and understand that this

person's in the tough situation of where you're

pretty much begging them for something, and they

have to really restrict how much of that you

can have. And your mouth absorbs it so quickly

that there's really not much to spit afterwards.

You kind of have to pretend. So that you're showing

that you're not swallowing it. But there were

those moments. And it's funny things that feel

like you're doing something you're not supposed

to. Where that little tiny bit of liquid in my

mouth. I just couldn't help it. I had to swallow

a little bit. But you could see that look on

the person's face of disappointment. Of knowing

you weren't supposed to do that. So I had to

learn that I could be hungry and still be happy.

I could watch other people eat, but still be

happy and wait and go through that patience.

And there's no doubt that my relationship with

God and the Holy Spirit helped me through that

time. Now, I'll also say it was not a credit

to me that I went through this. Obviously, as

soon as someone told me I could eat or drink,

I did. And everyone else on the floor in that

situation also had to go through that. And you

saw smiles and you saw laughter, which was part

of the beauty. So I don't want a takeaway to

be, wow, you know, it's that it was a tough thing

that different people have had to go through.

And some people, you know, I had to wait longer

than and there are other people that had to wait

a lot longer who might not be able to eat or

drink in the same way for the rest of their lives.

And so that was something that I was aware of

as well. Now, I'd lost 50 pounds throughout that

experience. I was very underweight. And so. Everyone

begged me to eat anything and everything that

I could, and it'd take months. But guess what?

Eventually, I worked my way back, and after losing

50 pounds, I gained 60. However, there were some

differences now from when I was at that weight

before, obviously. I'm not able to exercise the

same. My body doesn't operate the same. So I

had to be careful and I had to learn again, even

when I could eat, that I could be hungry and

still be happy. I didn't have to eat to where

I was full every meal and every time. Just like

Paul had learned and just like we can learn in

our relationship with food. In our relationship

with food and our desire paths with food, when

a lot of times food is accessible to us so often,

we don't have to let that be something that determines

our happiness. Now, I need to pause here to address

a couple things. One is that when we're talking

about food, our relationship with our doctor

or a nutritionist, if we have one or need to

have one, is very important. I'm going to mention

an idea of something that we can do once a week

that will help adapt our desire path with food

and help us to establish a way of participating

each week that could be helpful to us in developing

this discipline and this desire path. But again,

we need to pause and think thoughtfully for a

moment that this will apply to us in different

ways. Although I'm going to talk about food specifically

because I think it's important, we each have

a unique relationship with food. There was a

time... when I was very underweight, that if

I would have told my doctor or my nutritionist

that I'm going to treat food differently and

I'm going to learn that sometimes it's okay to

be hungry and still be happy, they would have

been extremely concerned. And some of us may

have had issues with our body image before or

an eating disorder to where doing something like

this could be dangerous. Or hazardous for you.

It could cause you to fall back into something.

That's been a challenge for you before. So we

each need to be mindful of that. And I'm also

mindful. For friends watching online. Or who

may watch it later. To a wider audience. That

it's really important. To think about that. And

to be mindful of it. And to talk to a pastor.

A doctor. If you're not sure about that. With

that said. For those of us who have the ability

to do that safely, something I would recommend

is to fast from one meal once a week. And that

can help adjust our relationship with food, our

desire path with food. A couple of things about

this are that I recommend a dinner. A dinner

because if we fast from lunch. what are we likely

to do at dinner? Eat a bigger dinner. Or if we

fast from breakfast, we'll eat a bigger lunch.

Or it might affect our energy through the day.

And so I found that fasting from one dinner one

day a week can be something that can be helpful

for me in learning that it's okay to be hungry

and still be happy. And that we don't need to

live in a way where Being full all the time is

something that is required for us as sometimes

in our minds it can be. We also have options

if that doesn't work well for us or if it's something

we need to work to, to where we can choose to

eat certain foods for one evening a week. We

might choose to abstain from certain things or

eat less than we normally do. To help us adjust

our desire paths toward food. We feel OK right

now. OK, I want to make sure we feel OK because

it's a sensitive topic. But sometimes I think

the idea of fasting can be overwhelming. And

sometimes I think we skew away from food because

we can be scared about asking people to fast

from that a little bit. So I really want to.

Try to find this balance. I've thought about

this a lot to make this accessible for folks,

but also to be wise in how we share about it.

Another thing that choosing to allow ourselves

to be hungry can do is to help us to connect

with folks who experience hunger on a regular

basis, and that's outside of their control. When

we had foster kids come and live with us, part

of the training that we had is that a lot of

times when kids are removed from their home due

to neglect or other issues, they would come with

the fear of food scarcity. So that sometimes

kids would get up and take food during the night,

not as a behavior of rebelliousness or something

of that. but out of the fear that if I don't

eat now or if I don't get food now, I don't know

if I'll have it later. So even right here in

our community, people experience hunger that

they're not able to control the circumstances

of. And I think that that can help connect us

to that, remembering that and experiencing that

with others. I found that, especially when we're

choosing to take that path, there's a beauty

and a humility to going to bed hungry. Now, again,

we're talking about one meal a week, one night

a week, not choosing to make that a habit or

a pattern, not allowing pride to set into place,

but being reminded that there are those around

us. who choose to go to bed, who do not choose

to go to bed hungry, but experience that. It

also helps us connect with folks like Paul, who

both by choice and not by choice, chose to or

didn't choose to go through that with intention

to be purposeful about it. It also helps us to

rely on God's strength. And remember that we

can rely on him rather than other things in order

to have that happiness and that peace. I know

that for me and for others, there are times where,

like with other things that we've discussed,

when we celebrate, we want to eat. It's natural.

It's part of our pattern. But it can come to

where food becomes that thing that we fill in

in each part of our life, whatever's happening.

I know, especially for me and for drive -thrus,

especially earlier on, partially because it was

easier for me to access drive -thrus. It's a

little trickier now, which is probably good for

me. But if I was tired, I wanted to eat because

I thought, well, being full, will help me sleep.

But also, if I was feeling sad, going through

a drive -thru was a way to help me feel a little

bit happier. If I was excited about something,

going through the drive -thru and eating something

would help me celebrate that. If I was feeling

lonely, then having something to eat could help

me deal with that. Or if I was hanging out with

a friend. Oftentimes, the first suggestion is,

and again, it's not a negative thing to get something

to eat, to let our desire paths always lead us

toward that. And this idea allows us a chance

where we can find other ways to allow us to have

a chance to connect with one another, to connect

with God, even to connect with ourselves and

not just have us be centered around that thing

each time. We've talked about social media and

how that can be a go to for us. And so we need

to find different paths. We've talked about complaining

and how that can be something that would become

really deeply connected to a go to thing for

us. We've talked about entertainment, all these

different things. So I don't want us to think

of one particular path to be the thing to connect

with shame or guilt. Or fear, but to allow that

to be part of the paths of the other things that

we're talking about that we want to foster health

with and positive spiritual health. OK, I'm ready

to pray. You guys OK to pray? All right, let's

go ahead and pray. Father, I thank you for today.

I thank you for the. Things that you put in our

life that bring us joy, that bring us peace.

I thank you that you provide us with food that

we need. We also pray that our desire paths would

be connected to you more than they are anything

else. And I pray that you would remind us that

we don't have to be full. To be happy. That sometimes

you call us. To go without. To be more deeply

connected with you. In Jesus name. Amen.