20260607 Biblical Manhood Recap Sunday Sermon Tim Dickmann

I thought this morning that I would do kind of

a recap of where we've been. And the reason for

that is because it is essential that you all

understand where we've been, what we've talked

about. So we began in the beginning with a look

at The family. We looked at Genesis. And so I

want to read this morning as we go through this

time. I've mentioned all these verses before.

I went through my notes. And I don't think there's

any new verses that we're going to look at this

morning. So you've heard all of these things

before. But I want them to be, again, put in

your minds that these are not just some ideas

that I have. that I think we're good, that, man,

if we could just implement these ideas that I

have, boy, we'd be doing well. But that's not

it, right? The idea is these are instructions

from the Lord. These are the principles that

he's given us, and they're in the Word. They're

not my ideas. So we began in the very beginning

there. We looked in Genesis. I'm going to read

them, so you don't have to turn. If you just

want to listen, that'd be great. So in Genesis

Genesis 2:18

chapter 2, verse 18, it says, Then the Lord God

said, It is not good for the man to be alone.

I will make him a helper suitable for him. Out

of the ground the Lord God formed every beast

of the field and every bird of the sky and brought

them to the man to see what he would call them.

And whatever the man called the living creature,

that was its name. The man gave names to all

the cattle, to the birds of the sky, and to every

beast of the field, but for Adam there was not

found a helper suitable for him. So the Lord

God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man,

and he slept. Then he took one of his ribs and

closed up the flesh at that place. The Lord God

fashioned into a woman the rib which he had taken

from the man and brought her to the man. The

man said, This is now bone of my bone and flesh

of my flesh. She shall be called woman, because

she was taken out of man. And for this reason

a man shall leave his father and mother and be

joined to his wife, and they shall become one

flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked

and were not ashamed. So we see there just the

establishment there of this family in the very

beginning. Paul then. We'll read it again. Paul

brings it up. He affirms these same things. You

know this is nothing. Nothing has changed. From

the very beginning there. To Paul's day. Paul

saying. This is still true. So in Ephesians 5.

He's giving instruction. He says. Wives be subject

to your husbands. As to the Lord. For the husband

is the head of the wife. As Christ is the head

of the church, he himself being the Savior of

the body. But as the church is subject to Christ,

so also the wives ought to be to their husbands

and everything. Husbands, love your wives just

as Christ loved the church and gave himself up

for her, so that he might sanctify her, having

cleansed her by the washing of water with the

word, that he might present to himself the church

in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or

any such thing, but that she would be holy and

blameless. So husbands ought also to love their

own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his

own wife loves himself. For no one ever hated

his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it,

just as Christ also does the church, because

we are members of his body. For this reason a

man shall leave his father and mother, and shall

be joined to his wife, and the two shall become

one flesh. This mystery is great, but I am speaking

with reference to Christ and the church. Nevertheless,

each individual among you also is to love his

own wife, even as himself, and the wife must

see to it that she respects her husband. So Paul

there refers back to Genesis when he's giving

instruction here for husbands and wives, saying

this is how it was back then, this is how it

is today. It hasn't changed. I want us to understand,

and I've said this, i've said this before we're

not talking here about lesser people husbands

and wives there's not there's not you know the

husband is the authority he's the head he was

created first and then you've got this subservient

woman who was just brought along no the lord

god created woman for what purpose because man

needed something he needed a helper and we've

we've said this before So when we deal with leadership,

when we deal with authority in the home, when

we say that there's an authoritative structure

in the home, that the man is the head of the

home, that he is the leader, it's not that the

wife is lesser, right? She's not less than. She

was designed and created for a specific purpose,

just as the man was. And when we fulfill the

roles that God has put us in, we're content,

we're blessed, we're happy, and we glorify God

in those things. So make sure we understand that.

So when we go through here and review these things,

when we think about these things, we're not talking

lesser, woman lesser than man. No, that's not

it at all. We're talking equality, both. Created

in the image of God, right? That's what Genesis

tells us. So, I want to stress, however, the

importance here of this authority structure.

I think I have. And so maybe you think I'm just

beating a dead horse. And that's fine. Hear me

once more then. It is imperative that we understand

this as men. We are to be the authority in our

homes. We are leaders. We are the heads of our

homes, just as Christ is the head of the church.

We are the head. I didn't say it. God said it.

We need to accept that. We need to put that into

practice. Why is it so important? Do you guys

understand how messed up, the world is today

because of this one fact. If this was the only

issue we had in the world, the world would be

a lot like it is today. You men, you young men,

you young married men, and you young men who

are not married yet, and you older men, this

applies to each and every one of us. When we

fail to lead our homes, when we fail to be the

authority in our homes, it brings nothing but

catastrophe. You may think, you know, everything's

fine. We're getting along. You know, yeah, maybe

I'm not leading in the way that I should, but

things are good. We have a good relationship.

Maybe so right now. Maybe so. But what's the

effect going to be upon your children? What's

the effect going to be upon your marriage as

you progress? I don't say these things because

I'm just thinking it could be bad. I know countless

marriages where the man refused to leave and

their lives were in shambles. They're still married

and they're going on, but they're not happy.

Their children are confused. Their children,

the boys then that are raised up into men, they're

not really men. They're following their wives

now because they've not had an example of a godly

man leading his home. Mom always made the decisions.

And now you have the same thing going on in their

homes. You men are to set an example. Of this

in your homes. Leading. Being an authority. It's

imperative. It is imperative. One way. That I'm

always reminded. Again. A number of folks that

I know. This isn't always the case. And so. I

hope we all understand. There's exceptions to

everything. We all understand that. as far as

personalities and things. But generally speaking,

wives are more emotional than their husbands.

That's just the way it is. Again, it may not

always be that way with every single relationship,

but in general, that is how it is. How many times

do we see, have I seen in a relationship, the

wife leading, and how is she leading? Based on

her emotions. Everything is a huge ordeal because

her emotions are not in check. It's constant

turmoil. And the husband just stands idly by

like, there's nothing I can do about it. What

am I supposed to do? This is just how it is.

They're children. There's no stability there.

It's a dreadful situation. I want to stress that

it may be fine now. You may think our relationship

is good as things are. It will not always be

that way. So you have that, right? We don't want

that. But more importantly than that, what else

can we say? You're in sin. Right? That's the

real issue. You have... Said God's way is okay

and good for some. But I know better in my own

life. And this is how it's going to be. You have

set yourself up as the authority. Rather than

God and his word. And you're in sin. That's the

major issue. Not only are you sinning against

God. You're sinning against your wife. You're

sinning against your children. You're sinning.

Against all around you. As you set this terrible

example of what leadership is supposed to be.

And so I'm trying to stress to you men. The importance

of this. This is not my thought or my opinion.

This is God's clear instruction for you. To be

leaders in your home. This is love. Do you want

to love your wife? Then you better lead her.

That's all there is to it. If you love, you will

lead. You will lead in love. We're not talking

here about authority or love. One or the other.

No. It is love to lead in your home. That is

the most loving thing you can do for your wife.

The other thing that I want to stress once more

is the impact of the family upon the church.

I mentioned this when we talked about family.

As the family goes, so goes the church, so goes

society. I think I said something along those

lines. You set an example in your home of leadership

and submission. That plays out in the church.

That plays out in the church. If there's no submission

in the home, why do we think there's going to

be any type of submission in the church? Why

would we think that? It's illogical and it's

unreasonable. And so that's how it plays out

in the church. Problems in the church often are

a result of problems in the home. A man is not

led properly. And again, I've seen this time

and again. The man is not led properly. He's

been led by the wife. Next thing you know, there's

all sorts of problems in the church. It is imperative

for the health of the family and for the health

of the church that men lead in their homes. Leading

in love. Leading according to the word of God.

Again, who is our example? Christ. Did Christ

do anything mean to the bride? No, he saved the

bride. He laid his life down for the bride. That's

how we lead. Doing what is necessary, not necessarily

what is fun, what is easy. Was it easy for Christ

upon this earth? No, it was not. But He did what

needed to be done in submission to His Father.

Lead in your homes. It is imperative. We talked

about biblical manhood. We talked about the results

of the curse and the roles that men and women

play, or that men and women have, that they are

different. We talked about how Adam was cursed

in his role. He was cursed in his work. Eve was

cursed in her role of submission and childbearing.

And so all that went on with that, again, if

we could read that. In Genesis 3, 16 through

19. To the woman he said, I will greatly multiply

your pain and childbirth and pain. You will bring

forth children, yet your desire will be for your

husband and he will rule over you. Then to Adam

he said, because you have listened to the voice

of your wife and have eaten from the tree about

which I commanded you, saying, You shall not

eat from it. Cursed is the ground because of

you. In toil you will eat of it all the day of

your life. Both thorns and thistles it shall

grow for you and you will eat plants of the field.

By the sweat of your face you will eat bread

till you return to the ground because from it

you are taken. For you are dust and to dust you

shall return. We didn't even mention the whole

issue right there, right? Of listening to the

voice of his wife rather than the voice of God.

Catastrophe came afterwards. He didn't lead.

And it's the same today. So, it's imperative.

It's imperative. Men, be men. All those things

that we talked about as far as what it is to

be a godly man. Taking dominion, responsibility.

All of those things are essential. The whole

idea of leading your family, what was the first

thing we said you've got to do if you're going

to lead your family? If you're going to be a

leader and authority in your home, what are you

going to do? You've got to lead yourself. You

have got to take care of yourself. You've got

to be responsible. You've got to be in the word.

You've got to be doing certain things. You need

to be a man of God. I'll read this passage. 2

Timothy 3 .16 I'm sure it's familiar. 2 Timothy

3 .16 All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable

for teaching, reproof, correction, and training

in righteousness, so the man of God may be adequate,

equipped for every good work. You've got to be

in the Word. You've got to know the Word. It

will equip you. It will correct you, instruct

you, and lead you in the way that you should

go. You've got to be that if you're going to

be a man of God and a leader in your home. You've

got to be faithful. You've got to be wise. You've

got to be submitted to God, devoted to His Word.

All of those things are necessary and essential

as men. If we're to lead our homes. Husbands.

We already read. Ephesians 5. 22 and 25. Again.

Very clear instruction there. As the head. Another

couple verses here. 1 Timothy 3. Again, I'm just

going to read these. These are instructions to

elders and to deacons. 3, 4, 1 Timothy 3, 4.

He must be one who manages his own household

well, keeping his children under control with

all dignity. But if he does not know how to manage

his own house, how will he take care of the church?

And then in verse 12, it's very similar. Deacons

must be husbands of one wife. good managers of

their children and their households. I bring

those up to say, these aren't special things

that only the elders and deacons are doing. The

elders and deacons are doing these things, but

everybody in the church should be doing them.

If you're not, then you're not qualified. But

this isn't just one thing here that the elders

and deacons are doing, oh, they're managing their

house well. No. Every man in the church ought

to be doing it. So, again, it's imperative. It

is important. We talked about leading as a prophet,

priest, and king. We're going to give those booklets

out from Joel Beeky on leading your home, leading

in the home. We want you to read them. I think

I should have brought them today. I meant to

bring them. We will bring those and give them

out. It's imperative that you read that. Again,

glean some help and instruction from that book.

It's very good. Husbands, leading your wives.

Leading in the home. It's important. It's imperative.

It is necessary. We did talk a little bit just

about making decisions. So that's one way that

we lead is we make these decisions, right? If

you're going to lead in your home, you are going

to begin the conversation on what needs to be

done, how we're going to do it. And again, it's

a conversation. It's not just, hey, this is what

we're doing. It's, hey, honey, here's what I

think we need to be doing. What do you think?

Are you on board with this? Have you got a bit

of wisdom in implementing this? What have you

got to say here? and you are both in agreement,

you help, and then what? You as the husband,

moving forward, implementing those things. Or

maybe she says, no, I don't want to do that.

Then what do you do? Well, this is what we're

doing. I am leading. This is important. This

is what should be done. I think this is biblical.

This is how we're going. We're moving forward.

Leading. And wives, what is your responsibility

then? To submit to that. As unto the Lord. Right?

Is it easy? No. Maybe not. But that's what's

necessary. So men, lead. Lead in decision making.

Lead in your homes. Alright. We talked about

fathers. Ephesians. Ephesians 6 .4 we mentioned.

Just very briefly, I think. Just two weeks worth.

Ephesians 6 .4 Fathers, do not provoke your children

to anger, but bring them up in the discipline

and instruction of the Lord. Okay, so we talked

about this bring them up is to nurture them.

I think if you've got the King James, I think

it might say that. So bringing them up is this

idea of nurturing. It's the same thing. Bringing

them up to maturity in the discipline and instruction,

the discipline, the whole training, the whole

rearing of your children, everything from instruction

to correction, reproof, spanking, all that's

included there. And so we talked about all that.

But I want to emphasize once more here the importance

of instruction. Alright? You fathers are to instruct

your children. You are to teach them. And so

I just ran through the Proverbs this morning.

Was that this morning or yesterday? Either way.

At some point. I just want to read a few verses

here. Proverbs 1 .8 Hear my son your father's

instruction and do not forsake your mother's

teaching. Are you giving instruction? Is your

son able to hear what you're saying? Or are you

silent? Are you silent in the home? Proverbs

1 .8 Proverbs 1 .10 My son If sinners entice

you, do not consent. He's instructing there,

right? Don't go after these guys. Don't follow

in their ways. Proverbs 2 .1 My son, if you will

receive my words and treasure my commandments

within you, make your ear attentive to wisdom,

incline your heart to understanding, and so on.

He goes on there. But what's he saying? If you

will receive my words and my commandments. He's

instructing him. He's teaching him. Here's what

you should do. Here's what you should not do.

3 .1. My son, do not forget my teaching, but

let your heart keep my commandment. Teaching.

It's everywhere. It's constant. He's teaching

here. It's imperative. It's constant. It's daily.

It's in every situation that we mentioned that.

There's always opportunity for instruction. Proverbs

4 .1 Hear, O sons, the instruction of a father

and give attention that you may gain understanding.

For I give you sound teaching. Do not abandon

my instruction. More instruction. You got the

picture. One more I will read here. Proverbs

5, 1. My son, give attention to my wisdom. Incline

your ear to my understanding. Here's the question

for you. You men, you young men in particular,

do you have wisdom? I'm seriously asking. You

don't have to answer out loud here. But I'm seriously

asking the question. Are you wise? Do you have

wisdom? Do you have wisdom to impart to your

children? If you don't. You better get in the

word. You better find some. Because you can't

instruct. You can't command. You can't lead and

guide if you don't have some. You've got to have

wisdom, and you only find it in the Word. Get

it. There's all sorts of encouragements to wisdom

all throughout Proverbs. It's wonderful. It's

to be had. James, if any man lack wisdom, what's

he supposed to do? Ask. Ask. Ask, seek, knock,

and it will be given unto you. That's the promise

to believers. Okay? Seek it. Find it. Get it.

So, instructing our children. Taking responsibility

for every aspect of our children's development,

we said. Physical, emotional, spiritual, social.

All of those things are our responsibilities

as fathers. And then we talked about relationship

with our children. I don't think I said this.

I found it in my notes the other day. But relationship

with our children. We talked about God as our

Father and our relationship with God. And that,

again, is our example in our relationship with

our children. What's the first relationship when

you come together as a family? Apart from your

relationship with God, it's your wife, right?

If you are developing a relationship with your

wife, it naturally comes that you're going to

have a relationship with your children. Because

all of those things you're doing with your wife,

the time that you spend together, the talking,

what happens? The games that you play? All of

a sudden you've got this little rugrat running

around there. What's he doing? He's sitting there

listening to the conversations. He's sitting

there while you're playing games. He's there

when you're spending time together. And next

thing you know, he's just part of it, right?

He's just right there with you. You start playing

these games that he can play. You're doing things

that he enjoys as well. But he's also involved

in all of it. And so it begins with your wife.

You're developing, nurturing this relationship

with your wife and then your kids come along

and it just continues. So you men, just because

you're married doesn't mean now all of a sudden

you can neglect your wife. You have to still

maintain that relationship. It should grow. It

should flourish. Each day should be better. You

should want to spend more time with your wife.

When I saw a t -shirt, my favorite day is the

day spent with you. Today is my favorite day.

Something like that we saw at the shop the other

day. But that's true. Each day should be your

new favorite day that you're spending with your

wife. Because it should just be that much more

that you know her and enjoy her. Again, it was

a corny shirt. It was funny. Okay, developing

relationship. And then we talked about discipline.

And so I want to read these, the spanking of

our children. I'm going to read through these

again because these are important. Again, this

is not my idea that we're going to be spanking

our children. This is God's Word giving clear

instruction to parents. Proverbs 13, 24. He who

withholds his rod hates his son, but he who loves

him disciplines him diligently. Again, we talked

about that. Love and hate. If you hate him, you're

just going to let him go his own way. You're

not going to spank him. You're not going to discipline

him. Proverbs 19, 18. Discipline your son while

there is hope, and do not desire his death. Proverbs

22 .6 Train up a child in the way he should go.

Even when he is old, he will not depart from

it. 22 .15 Foolishness is bound up in the heart

of a child. The rod of discipline will remove

it far from him. Proverbs 23 .13 -14 Do not hold

back discipline from the child. Although you

strike him with the rod, he will not die. You

shall strike him with the rod and rescue his

soul from Sheol. And then Proverbs 29, 15 and

17. The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child

who gets his own way brings shame to his mother.

Correct your son and he will give you comfort.

He will also delight your soul. Clear instructions

from the Word of God. Will you heed them? Will

you put them into practice? This is the time,

you young parents, this is the time, you young

men, to begin all of these things. We all know,

guys, it just gets harder. I remember as a young

man, I was just speaking of developing habits,

developing patterns in our lives. Those patterns,

when we develop them, they're hard to break.

We all know that. It's hard to break habits.

And so if you're developing and setting bad habits

now, it just gets harder as you get older. The

longer you do it, the harder it is. And I always

remember in high school, playing sports, right?

Really busy. Well, when I'm done with high school,

I'll have a little more time for the Lord. I'll

be able to be more consistent, right? Because...

I won't be playing basketball. I won't be playing

this. I won't be doing that. I won't be having

to go to the gym every day. Right? No, of course

not. So I get into college and I'm like, well,

this is a real drag. I'm working and I'm going

to school now. And I'm trying to go to the gym.

And I want to still have some time with my friends.

And I want to see my girlfriend. But once I'm

done with this. Once this phase of my life is

over and I'm married or I just got my job, then

I'm going to have time. I'll have time then.

All this other stuff is gone, right? Easy. What

happens? I get married. I've got a job. I've

got two jobs. I've got some kids. Where's the

time? I still don't have it. That's how it works.

That's how we think. Next week, next month, after

this busy, once this big thing gets over with.

No, you're never going to have time. You have

got to develop the time in your life. Develop

the habits, the patterns. Now, being in the Word,

leading your wife, disciplining your children.

All of these things are now. Begin now, you unmarried

folk. Now is the time to develop good habits

and good patterns in your life. It's not going

to get easier later. I promise. So far, in all

that we've dealt with, who's been responsible?

Men. You men, I have hopefully stressed, this

is all on you. Everything that we've talked about

today and everything we've talked about in the

last two months is all on you. If you've not

felt the weight of that, I don't think you've

hurt me. I have felt the weight of it. As I teach

these things, as I study and I think about what

I'm going to say, I see my failures everywhere.

I see that I've not loved my wife as I should.

I've been impatient with her. I've not led her

well. All of these things. I've failed in all

of these things. I see my failures in all of

them. Why do I say that? It's difficult. And

we're not looking for perfection from everybody,

but we've got to see. The weight of it all and

the need to change. It is a huge weight upon

you men. Everything is on your shoulders. The

training, instruction, discipline of your children

is your responsibility, not your wife's. Yes,

she should be helping. She is going to have a

role in it. It rests on you. If you've not felt

that weight, you've not heard me. If you have

felt that weight and that burden, good. Go to

the Lord for the strength and the help that you

need. And he will give it. He is there for us.

He's commanded us to do these things. Do we not

think he'll give us the strength, the wisdom,

the direction to accomplish all that he's called

us to? Of course he will. Be encouraged in that.

If you failed, repent and move forward. Move

forward in obedience. Look into the Lord for

His help and for His guidance. Be encouraged

that in Christ you can do these things. Okay?

Again, we know we're going to fail. But that's

no excuse. we're still going to press on faithfully

doing all that the Lord has commanded. So be

encouraged in that and press on it. Next week,

Lord willing, we will look at wives and their

responsibilities and what the Lord has called

them to. Amen.