Listening to Others

Uh I'm gonna jump into the message.

We're in a a series right now called All Ears.

And kind of what sparked this was I I was gonna just do one message in the series, Well Done, talking about a well done life.

What does that look like?

And how listening is a part of that.

And as I started to work on that message, it kind of morphed into something I thought, you know, I I need to take a few weeks for this.

Uh what does it mean to listen well?

Listen well to God, uh, listen well to yourself, listen well to other people.

So we're in the third message.

The last couple messages were about listening to God.

You know, how do you do that?

Uh listening to yourself.

You know, should I should I listen to my heart or should I not?

And how do I know which feelings or thoughts to listen to and which ones not to?

Uh talked about that last week, and then today we're gonna talk about listening to other people.

Let's just take a moment, quiet our hearts, and pray and prepare to hear God's word.

Lord, we come to you in Jesus' name.

I thank you, God, for the opportunity to be here with my brothers and sisters.

And God, I pray you would just cause your word to come alive.

Help us to see things in there, Lord, that you want us to see.

And then help us to see things in us that you want us to see.

God, I pray that we would have a sense of uh conviction without condemnation, uh, Lord, to see the changes that we need to make and yet to feel hope around that, not dejected, not beaten down, but built up.

In Jesus' name, all God's people said, Amen.

Amen.

I want to start with uh Proverbs 14, 12.

Proverbs 14, 12 says, There's a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death.

There's a way that seems right to a person, but the road that they're taking, the path that they're on, is a path of deception, or as it says here, death.

I wonder how many people read that verse and think about how it applies to them versus how it applies to other people.

Because I do think um when you see somebody who you think has a warped point of view, but they're really confident in their wrongness, but they're sure they're right, but you're sure they're wrong.

You ever see somebody like super confident and you're going, man, these guys, they got it all wrong.

Uh, but they're living in deception and they're going off a cliff, man.

They couldn't be more wrong.

I think it's one of those verses we have a tendency to automatically apply to other people.

I wonder how many people read that verse and go, you know, I wonder if it's me.

Like, I wonder if there's a way that I think is right.

I wonder if I'm locked into my own rightness, and yet I couldn't be more wrong.

Um, you think about Jesus' teaching.

Uh, Jesus was obviously fully God, fully man.

He was a prolific, skilled teacher.

And yet so much of his teaching was not accepted by people because it would fall into their blind spots, or it might fall into areas where they were dogmatic in a belief.

And even though they were wrong and Jesus was speaking truth, the truth wasn't enough because they couldn't see it, they couldn't receive it.

And I think this is why one of Jesus' tactics and teaching is he would give diagnostic advice.

Like nobody would say that they people wouldn't say they're greedy people, but Jesus gives a diagnostic in Matthew 6.

He says, Hey, uh, where your treasure is, there your heart is.

So there's a diagnostic.

You could literally go look at where you put your money, and it will tell you a story about where your heart is.

And it's not like it's just totally that simple, but it's at least a good starter.

And if you go there, it's telling you something.

It doesn't matter what you say, where you're putting your resources, your time, energy, and money, it says more than your mouth.

In fact, then he runs a man through this diagnostic a few chapters later in Matthew 19.

There's a rich man, a rich young ruler comes to Jesus, and he comes with sincerity and deep questions, and he says, Um, hey, what do I have to do to inherit eternal life?

And Jesus goes back and forth with him.

And once he really perceived the man was sincere, Jesus says, Um, hey, I got a diagnostic for you.

Um, just think about this.

Here's what you need to do sell all your stuff, everything.

Okay?

Fire sale.

Sell it all, give the money to the poor, and come follow me.

And the Bible says the guy like put his head down and went away sad because he's like, I don't want to do that.

And so what's Jesus doing?

He's running him through a diagnostic.

Jesus wasn't uh trying to get the man to buy his way into the kingdom of God.

He wasn't doing something legalistically, he was doing something diagnostically.

I want you to see how important this stuff is to you because you may not know.

It's hiding in plain sight.

And so I think when we think of diagnostics and we look at the, we look at the teachings of Jesus, but I think just things, there are some things in general that if you look at them together, they start to paint a picture for you.

And today, actually, I want you to think about the relationship between how well you listen and how much you care.

There's a correlation for sure between how much you care about a person or a topic and how well you listen.

In fact, if if you could press a button and just care more, you would definitely listen better.

Like that would just happen.

In fact, the areas you don't listen at all, you you don't care.

And it could be a couple things, like it could be a person you don't care about.

So they they may be desperate and they may be pleading, but you don't, maybe if you don't have any care for that person, then you're not gonna listen well.

Or it could be somebody you love very much, you care about, but you don't care about what they're talking about.

And because of that, it goes in one ear and and out the other.

There's a correlation, and if but if I care about the person and I care about what they're talking about, then I will naturally listen better than if I don't.

I mean, think about this.

Like, if you've ever been trying to communicate something you you were passionate about and somebody wasn't listening, it really ticked you off.

It really bothered you deeply.

And the reason it bothers you deeply wasn't just because they didn't hear you, it was because the message they're sending back to you is I don't care.

That's what they're telling you.

Like, even let's say you work for a big company, and you work for a big company, and in the onboarding, they bring you through and they go, hey, listen, we you matter.

Okay, you matter.

This thing doesn't happen without you.

You're the VIP up in here, you're the you're the MVP, okay?

And then they put the MVP on the lanyard and they tell you how important you are, and then something's going on and it's not good, and then you go tell somebody and no one listens.

And you're going like, I thought I thought I mattered.

Because you walked away going, I don't, they don't care.

Now, um reasonable people know that you can't link you listened to me with you did everything I said.

Some people link that, well, you you didn't listen to me.

You didn't listen to me.

And what they mean is you didn't do what I said.

You gotta know you people that listen to you aren't always gonna do everything you say.

Um, if you're a reasonable person and you work at a big company and you go in and you have a complaint or you have a thought or whatever it is, you don't necessarily expect the company to cater all of their systems, processes, and everything around your preferences.

That's not a reasonable thing, but it is reasonable if you care about me to actually listen, really listen to what I'm saying.

And and if you think of it on the other side, if you ever had somebody who really did listen to you, I mean they were really locked in.

They they they really were connecting the dots.

Like if you've ever been talking, you're like, I don't know if this makes any sense, and then they say it back to you, and you're like, no, they get it.

They've they were tuned in.

This can be somebody you barely know, but you feel cared about.

And this is where sometimes it's kind of uh, I think, confusing because sometimes people that really should care about us based on their proximity or the nature of their relationship as a family member or a longtime friend that doesn't care enough to listen, and yet somebody over here who we barely know listened well, and somehow I feel more cared for here than here.

But there is a correlation between how we listen and how much we care.

And this is one of the reasons why I think it's essential as the body of Christ that we develop a reputation as really great listeners.

So sometimes the body of Christ is known more for our statements, which sometimes you gotta make a statement.

Sometimes that's a good thing to do.

Uh there, that's an appropriate thing to do.

Um, I just don't know, I don't, I don't, at least I don't hear the refrain out there, you know, like the body of Christ man, there's something about those guys, they just listen well.

And and um I want to look at actually from Jesus.

We're gonna go to uh John 11, and I wanna, I'm I'm I didn't know what to call it, but uh here's what I came up with.

Okay, five observations from Jesus listening masterclass.

All right, we're gonna get a masterclass from Jesus.

And what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna actually show you within a story, a story that's really known for something else.

I want to show you how Jesus listens within the story.

Uh, it's the story of Lazarus, and Lazarus is known as being raised from the dead, okay?

But I want you to watch, and we're not gonna focus so much on Jesus raising Lazarus from the dead, as much as we're gonna watch his process of listening.

Um, we're gonna start in uh John 11, verse 1.

John 11:1

It says, A man named Lazarus was sick, and he lived in Bethany with his sisters Mary and Martha, and this is the Mary who later poured in the expensive perfume on the Lord's feet and wiped them with her hair, and her brother Lazarus was sick, so the two sisters sent a message to Jesus telling him, Lord, your dear friend is very sick.

Verse 5.

So although Jesus loved Martha, Mary, and Lazarus, he stayed where he was for the next two days.

Finally, he said to his disciples, let's go back to Judea.

Uh point number one is there is a correlation between caring and listening.

Now, I want you to notice, Jesus doesn't necessarily respond right away to their request.

It wasn't that he didn't listen, it wasn't that he didn't care.

It was uh actually Jesus understood that what was about to happen with Lazarus was going to be a part of a bigger part of his mission, it was a bigger part of his purpose.

In fact, in terms of uh biblical context, this is right before Jesus goes to the cross.

And it was actually Jesus raising Lazarus from the dead that was a catalytic event that caused the powers that be to take Jesus so seriously that ultimately he went to the cross.

And Jesus knew that in terms of the big puzzle of all of this, this was a huge piece.

So it wasn't that he didn't hear them, um, it was actually he knew things they that they didn't know, and and he was this was part of his journey.

Um of the things that's interesting when you study this text is the uh commentaries and the the biblical historians will tell you that it's extremely significant that John mentions, the author John, mentions that Jesus loved, and then he mentions each person by name.

He didn't just say, and Jesus loved them all.

Or he doesn't say, Jesus loved that family.

It says Jesus loved Martha, Mary, and Lazarus.

And the significance of that was he's drawing attention to the fact that Jesus understood them and knew them individually, that he understood their different personality types, that he was in close relationship with them.

And so we see, first of all, the fact that Jesus cared.

And friend, I want to ask you something, and I say this not in no way to talk down to you or to put some sort of um dysfunctional guilt, but if you find yourself not listening well or not even wanting to listen, I do think the first diagnostic question is do I care?

And if there's whole groups of people like you don't give a rip about, or there's somebody for whatever reason, I don't care, at least own it.

I don't care.

And I you can stop there if you want, because you know, this is the United States of America, and you're a citizen and you can do whatever you're a grown-up and you have a free will and you can do what you want.

I just think as the body of Christ, we shouldn't be cool with just not caring.

I understand we can't care about everything and everybody all the time do everything, but I think we should care, man.

And I think if we don't care, we should ask God to help us care.

You know, Jesus cared.

Matthew 9, they brought tons of people to him, all these people, and it said he looked at these massive crowds of people, and he didn't just see a nameless, faceless crowd.

He saw sheep without a shepherd, and it said he was compassionate toward them.

I think we need to care.

And if we don't care, I think we need to deal with that.

We we had a uh a few years ago, I was up here, I'm preaching a message, and I still remember what the message was about.

I was I was juxtaposing a battleship and a cruise ship, right?

And I was like, okay, the body of Christ, we're a battleship, we're not a cruise ship.

And so I start, but I first started talking about cruise ships.

And I was like, hey, anybody ever been on a cruise?

You know, and then hands went up everywhere, and I was like, I did something I don't normally do.

I was like, hey, shout out! Like, what do you experience on a cruise ship?

So people yelling out, food, and you stop at the ports and you know, and all this, you know, shows and da-da-da.

And so what I what I was wanting to do was talk about, hey, uh, you get on a cruise, nobody gets on a cruise, like, you know, I wonder what I have to offer.

You know, no one does that.

You get on, you're like, I already paid my money, dude.

This is all you can eat, is what it is.

Bring me another entree.

All right, it's already paid for, okay.

Um, you you're not there to be uh a producer or your consumer.

When you get on a battleship, it's different.

Everybody's got their role.

Everybody matter, nobody just gets on you like, I'm just here to ride.

Like, no, man, you're on here, you got a job to do.

Like, we're part of and we're going somewhere.

Cruise just makes a big circle and ends up right back to where they started.

But a battleship's going somewhere to do something.

So that was my whole message.

But I'm halfway in and I'm talking about a cruise ship, and people are talking about overeating on cruises and whatever.

And this late, this lady uh who had never been to our church, it was her first week, got really upset about it, and she stood up and started yelling at me in the middle of service, like yelling at me about what in the world, like I'm going through hard times, and you guys are in here talking about cruise ships.

And and she was really offended and really upset, and and she and she's like kind of took over and was yelling.

I was a little caught off guard.

I'm kind of like, hey, because somebody helped my sister out, and and so um some some people came and escorted her out, and uh, and then I just took a moment, I'm like, hey guys, um, please don't do that.

Okay, like if you ever feel like you're God's telling you to stand up and hijack the room in the middle of me talking, that's not God.

All right, so like don't that's not how God works.

You can send an email though, God's totally cool with that, or you can write it down, or you can go talk to a host, but like you don't interrupt, two prophets don't prophesy at the same time.

We do everything in decency and in order.

I coached that up a little bit, and then and then and then and then we prayed for this lady because I didn't know who she was, and I'm like, but you know, let's pray for her, right?

We're here to serve, and clearly, I mean, she's going through some stuff, so let's pray.

And we did, and then I went back in my message.

When I got done, went outside, and I was like, hey, what happened?

You know, where's she at?

Well, bottom line is man, the people that escorted her out, they didn't escort her to the uh corner of the premises and say, good riddance.

They listened to her.

Hey, what's up?

What are you going through?

How can we help?

But they listened to her, they found out she she had layers of issues, lots of pain, lots of trauma.

And to her, frankly, she was put out.

I came in here, I'm going through hell.

And you guys are talking about cruise ships, this is weird.

She she didn't get it, but at the same time, it was okay.

She was hurting.

And so these people sat there and they prayed with her and they listened to her, and they actually helped meet a couple smaller practical needs that they could.

It's not they solve all of her problems because most times it's not you know it's not like we can't just solve it all.

I can't raise Lazarus from the dead, but I can do something.

And so they sat there and they did that, and I thought, man, I love this church and I love these people because the statement they just made, this woman, even though what you did was out of order and you lack decorum and all this, we can I can sense your desperation, I can listen deeply enough.

And and at some point when something like that happens, it is jarring, and there is a part of you that just wants to solve the solve the problem, but it's tested in that moment.

When you walk out the door and the problem's neutralized, here's the question Do you care?

That is a question.

Do you care at all?

Yes or no?

And if you don't listen, if you don't care, you won't listen.

And and so so I think we have to start with that.

And we see from Jesus he cared, and he cared about each one of these individuals.

The second is uh that we learn in this masterclass is that great listeners learn to customize to the individual.

So look at this.

John 11, okay, Jesus shows up four days after Lazarus has been dead.

And look at the different responses.

It says uh in verse 20, when Martha got word that Jesus was coming, he's finally showing up four days late, she went to meet him.

I'm not gonna sit here and wait on you, I'm gonna go meet you out in the parking lot.

Catch me outside.

But Mary stayed in the house.

Different personalities and different people handle some of the same feelings different ways.

Mary stays in the house, Martha comes charging out.

Now look at this.

Martha said to Jesus, Lord, if only you had been here, my brother would not have died.

Um, Mary's still in the house.

Mary finally comes out of the house in verse 32, and look at this.

When Mary arrived and saw Jesus, she fell at his feet and said, Lord, if only you had been here, my brother would not have died.

Notice they both said the same thing, but one of them said it in his face, and the other said it at his feet.

I have to imagine that they probably sounded differently the way it came out.

I mean, I don't have video evidence, but based on what we know about Martha, okay, her personality, if you read other scriptures about Martha, Martha's the one that when they had the big meal in the house and Mary was sitting at Jesus' feet, Martha comes in and is like, who's gonna help me clean up?

Then she starts barking at Jesus.

Hey, why don't you tell Mary to get away from your feet?

Come help me clean this thing up.

She starts telling Jesus what to do.

She's a gutsy woman.

Martha's not to be messed with, all right?

You don't mess with Martha, okay?

She's an alpha, she's not playing this, okay?

I I did this whole thing, y'all aren't gonna stick me with the dishes.

All right.

I I cooked this whole thing, yo.

You want me to do the get up, okay?

And she's telling, we're about to have Jesus come in, okay?

You turn water into wine, let's see what you can do with these dishes.

Um that's Martha's personality, and yet Mary was the one at Jesus' feet.

She was more passive.

And and so, and you see now, if you really look, now we gotta look deep, we gotta listen close to the text.

Listen close to the text.

Martha comes out in Jesus' face, but what's up?

She's hurting, man.

She's confused.

What's up, dude?

I call I I sent you a message two days earlier, and you're gonna show up four days later.

What happened in six days?

She's upset, she's in Jesus' face, and you'll see Jesus actually has a conversation with Martha.

Mary, when she can finally get herself out, she sang the same thing Martha said, but she sang it at Jesus' feet.

Martha's like, if you had been here, my brother wouldn't have died.

Mary's, if you'd been here, my brother wouldn't have died.

And what we see of Jesus' response to Mary is he simply listened to her.

He doesn't go back and forth with her.

In fact, what you're about to see is one of the more famous verses in the whole Bible.

Is John 11, 35 says, Jesus wept.

And Jesus wept, it says in the scripture, in response to the pain of Mary.

The verse is famous because it's the shortest verse in the Bible.

That's why everybody knows it.

Like I memorized my scripture today.

Jesus wept, got one, okay.

But it's such a powerful verse because what it is is it's Jesus' understanding.

And it was Jesus' custom response to Mary.

He knew Mary didn't need the same conversation Martha had.

She wasn't ready for that.

That he would just sit and listen, and then what she really needed was that connection and for Jesus to cry with her.

Um great listeners customized to the individual.

Number three is uh listen past what they said to what they were trying to say.

I I think uh, you know, Jesus obviously had the advantage that he was omniscient, he knew everything, but I don't think you have to be omniscient to cut these women some slack for being upset or for saying something like, if you'd been here, this wouldn't happen.

Now, here's what here's what I found.

People often who are in chaotic situations, emotional situations, even when you're trying to listen well, sometimes will give you a reason to be offended if you'll take it.

They'll give you something because it doesn't always come out quite right.

And yet, Jesus, I appreciate about him that Jesus doesn't get defensive.

Because when I get offended, I get defensive.

And when I get defensive, my whole listening posture changes.

It changes from I'm listening because I want you to, I want you to feel the love and feel the care and I want to help you, to now I feel defensive.

And I've literally I've I've won and lost at this.

I've done good and bad.

I there have been times I was came in with the right intention to help somebody, and then they said something, and me like, well, if you would have, and I'm like, what are you talking to me for?

I didn't do anything.

Why are you mad at me?

Now all of a sudden I'm defensive.

So now all my listening isn't actually to help you, it's to defend myself.

So so that can take your criticism apart.

So that because now you're making me feel bad.

And you can see how Jesus, again, could have gotten defensive, could have felt defensive, but he refused to do that.

And you do that by listening past what's said to what they said, to what they're trying to say.

And I think a lot of people, man, our listening skills get stunted, and actually we get stuck as the listener because we get fixated on what they said.

But you said this.

But you said now what were they trying to say?

What were they trying to say?

Um some of you know a little bit about our family.

We have two sons on the autism spectrum.

Our our older son, Hudson, is 11.

He's a little bit, uh I would say, more severe on the spectrum, his communication skills and so some of these things.

And my my wife and I were out of town for a few days.

Whenever we go out of town, we try to prepare our boys.

You know, okay, guys, we're gonna we'll be back, and we show them the date on the calendar, but they're not fully getting it, and you know, when are they gonna come back and stuff?

And they really, especially Miss Shaylin.

And so so we we get back from this trip, and um, it's like maybe we'd been back about a day, and Shaylin and I are having this important conversation, and Hudson keeps trying to get Shaylin's attention, and um and and as he he keeps trying to butt in, and and and we're hold on a second, you know, you gotta wait your turn, and you know, and we're we're talking, and finally, after about his fourth attempt to butt into our conversation, he goes, You're a loser.

He said it to Shaylin, okay.

You're a loser, which is like, what?

I mean, that's like an abomination, right?

Who calls their mom a loser?

Okay, so in the moment, I was like, no one talks to my wife like that.

Okay, but but um of course you gotta correct, hey buddy, we don't you know we don't do that, we don't talk like that.

I don't want to overreact, but I want to underreact.

So I'm kind of a deer in headlights, okay.

How do I handle this?

And yet Shaylen, you know, had the presence of mind to realize, like, okay, we gotta talk about, we don't say that type of thing, but she realized she could hear more.

Okay, he doesn't think his mom's a loser.

He was trying to come up with whatever he could say that would snap us out of the conversation that would get him the attention.

Well, why does he want her attention?

He's going, you know, I miss you.

Do you care about me?

And so Shaylin had the presence of mind.

They went out, hey, let's go sit out on the porch, and they did, and they had a conversation, and pretty soon it was like, okay, like she could she could hear what he was, not what he was saying.

You're a loser.

What was he trying to say?

I missed you.

I didn't know when you were gonna come back.

I'm thankful you're here.

I want to feel the value and the bond and the connection.

That's what he's trying to say.

And guys, you you gotta hear beneath people.

Will always give you a good thing you could latch on to and go, but you said this and you're this way.

The question comes back to point number one, how much do you care?

Because if you care enough, you'll listen beneath the surface.

There are some people who are coming off angry, they're really actually desperate, they're really actually afraid, they're really actually concerned.

Like there's something else underneath that.

You know, you see a kid trying to get attention, you know that kid's going, Am I valuable?

There are some people that say things or come off arrogant, but if you can hear underneath the cocky statement, you know, this person's painfully insecure.

You you gotta be an astute listener.

And so Jesus was able to listen underneath what they said to what they were actually trying to say.

And then, of course, again, back to verse 35, it says Jesus wept.

You know, I think the fourth thing from Jesus' masterclass is that a little bit of empathy goes a long way.

A little bit of empathy goes a long way.

The willingness to sit there and to listen.

And I think I think uh empathy is the action step before the action step.

It's like the first action step.

And empathy is one of those things, I think, when you say the word, it has this touchy-feely connotation.

But I think the reality is it takes a lot of toughness, a lot of strength to develop empathy.

It takes a willingness to sit in there and to go the distance.

And I think even that in and of itself is a win.

It goes a long way.

Um the fifth thing in the masterclass is uh to help in the way you're empowered to help.

To help in the way that you're empowered to help.

Um what I found is this when I've listened to people well, oftentimes somebody comes in and they start working their way through a thought or a feeling or whatever they're processing, and we get to the end, and sometimes I'm like, oh hey, you want to do this?

Hey, you want to do that?

Hey, what if we do it?

Hey, can I help with it?

And a lot of times I've I can't tell you how many times I've had somebody go, no, actually, I feel a lot better.

I'm good now.

I'm actually good, man.

Thanks for listening.

I'm like, are you sure, man?

Because we can go to no, I mean actually I feel great.

That was all I needed.

So sometimes, like, it's all it's all somebody needs.

Like, it's that's a huge deal.

And yet, other times there is like, okay, what is something I can do?

I want to encourage you, don't develop, do not develop a God complex.

It's your job to go fix everybody's stuff and you're pathologically responsible, and I gotta be, I gotta do this, I gotta do that.

But but also I think uh sometimes on the back end of empathy, when I listen well, it's like, you know what, I can do this.

And don't go, well, that's just a little thing.

No, the little thing goes a long way.

And uh, you know, we look at Jesus, of course, he was empowered to raise Lazarus from the dead, and he did so.

But most of I mean, we don't, I don't have that in my bag.

I don't know if you do, but I I don't.

But but I can do some, hey, I can help you with this problem.

You know what I mean?

I can pray for you.

Man, I can I I can't raise your your brother from the dead, but I can follow up with you a couple weeks after and check on you.

You know, you know, I can do I can bring you a meal uh that week because you're so caught up in grief that to make your own, just let me bring you some food.

Like I can do those type of things, and so I think we look in what is within our power to do what gesture, or maybe I can't solve all your needs, but I can do one.

And so we see Jesus doing that.

I I want to end with this.

Um I I recommended at the beginning of this series the book Whisper by Mark Batterson, where he talks, really it focuses on listening to God.

But within one of the chapters, he mentions uh a study by a guy named Howard Gardner.

He's a uh a Harvard uh professor who has a theory of multiple intelligences.

So it's like, depending on which one you read, eight or nine different types of intelligence that people have.

Uh so he talks about like mathematic intelligence.

Some people, numbers just make sense, some linguistic, some people they just words like they're great storytellers and they latch onto words, they're good at learning languages.

Uh, some people are body smart, like they they just get like dancers or athletes or you know, people that they can just like just make sense, the things they can do with their bodies.

People are music smart, uh, they just music makes sense, they can pick it up quick, they learn fast.

Um, and then there's things like interpersonal smart.

And interpersonal smart is not just someone who has people skills, but they can perceive, they're perceptive of people's feelings, they're perceptive of their motives, uh, they can just read well.

And then there's inter per uh intrapersonal smart, uh, which is actually to be able to even be self-aware and see within themselves.

And and so I think with this, when you think about listening, there are some people naturally gifted by God, brilliant in the area of perceiving other people.

And I think these people are naturally good listeners.

Some of you, you've had people tell you, you're the best listener, thank you.

You're such a good listener, and you're like, and no one even trained you for it.

You just you it just it's just you're just smart, you just pick it up quick.

If you are in that part of the uh intelligence spectrum of interpersonal, I want to I want to encourage you to take it really seriously, to add skills to your gift, and to lead the way in the body of Christ, creating a trend and a culture around the body of Jesus, being great listeners.

Be a masterclass, man, do it well.

Listen beneath the surface, um, you know, bring your empathy to the table, do all of it, like be a leader, be be a model.

And every time God uses you to listen to somebody, don't just go, all I did was listen.

You gotta walk away knowing no, what you did was care, and you proved the care.

They walked away, I feel cared for.

So let God use you in that way.

And then and then also to create uh an example for other people.

And let me say this to the others.

Maybe there are some of you you're like, you know, I'm pretty good with numbers, but man, I'm sometimes oblivious to people.

Maybe you're the kind of person you you're going, you know, it's not that you're dumb, it's just like in this area, it's like you're going, oh, I mean, I didn't know everybody was feeling that.

You know, you just seem to not know.

Instead of getting upset with yourself or feeling bad about yourself, or going, yeah, I'm no good at this, so I don't care.

If you're the type of person that just goes, Yeah, I don't care, don't wear it as a badge of honor because some people do.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't care.

I don't care what anybody thinks.

Really?

I mean, I don't think that's healthy, you know?

I mean, I realize you can spend your whole life doing what everybody thinks.

I mean, that's not healthy either, but to not care what anyone thinks, dang, I don't think that's healthy.

Like, I think there's probably some health in there, like some balance in there.

And at some point to go, you know what?

If I kind of don't care, maybe that's where I start.

Because I'll become a better listener as I develop compassion.

And maybe I start and I go, and that's your prayer.

Lord, help me.

I I don't, this doesn't come naturally to me.

This doesn't come naturally to me.

I tend to tend to see things my way.

I tend to be able to compartmentalize and not care.

Lord, I want to care more.

I want what breaks your heart to break mine.

I want the heart of Jesus.

And so if that's you, maybe that's your action step in prayer is Lord, help me to have compassion.

I want to be like Matthew 9.

I care about people.

I care.

I want to be like John 11, that I care.

And you start there and start growing in this.

You you may never be a superstar in the zone, but you can get better than you are now, and you'll be surprised the way that God can use you, even outside of your talent, even outside of your gift, to use you when he anoints you with his Holy Spirit.

So here's what I'm gonna invite you to do.

I'm gonna invite you to stand up on your feet.

I'm gonna call our prayer team forward.

And uh, I want to give an opportunity, especially to anyone who's come in today, and you go, Greg, when you're talking about not being listened to and how it makes you feel alone and sometimes not cared about.

Today I want to give you an opportunity that you don't have to leave this place today without having someone who will listen and someone who will pray.

Can't necessarily solve all the problems, but we have people here.

If you're online, by the way, we have a prayer team for our online, so go right to uh whatever platform you're on.

Uh the messaging mechanism that we have right there, let us know your prayer requests.

We'll listen and pray even now.

But as we take a moment, I want us to just take a minute or so to reflect and allow the Lord to take his word and to give you specific application.

Let's do that together.