Discover the Proof

Well it's good to be here.

I'm going to continue the series in John 13, and I've been reading John 13 now for about six months because I've known I was going to speak this message.

And let's be honest.

I'm ready to move on, okay?

I'm ready to get this off my chest this morning and move on so I can read John 14.

But turn your Bible right now to John 13.

There's some tremendous things that the Lord speaks about in John 13.

And if you remember, when we started this series, Pastor Robert kind of gave you an understanding of what we're doing.

We're going chapter by chapter.

If you're a first-time guest this morning, we are in a series on the book of John, where every week is another chapter.

And as Pastor Robert said in the beginning, it's impossible to look at every chapter and to really preach every message in those chapters.

For example, in John 13, this is where Jesus washes the disciples' feet.

That's a tremendous message there.

Also, John calls himself the one Jesus loved here in John 13 for the first time.

And we hear that, and remember, Pastor Robert said for years people have made fun of it because John wrote that about himself.

But then we got a great revelation about that.

I'm going to share some more this morning about that one thing.

Also, Judas makes his final decision in John 13 to betray Jesus.

And it's a moving time when he leaves the room where the disciples are meeting for the Passover feast.

He goes out and betrays Jesus, collects his 30 pieces of silver.

Also, Jesus says a real emotional goodbye to his friends.

Now I want you to pay close attention, not that you have not been playing close attention, but in John 13, 14, 15, and 16, Jesus begins to talk very intimately to these men that he's been walking with now for three years.

And he says a very emotional goodbye.

For example, how many of you, if you knew that in 18 hours your life was going to end, you knew the minute that it was going to end in 18 hours, you would probably be around your family, your friends, people that you really love, and you would carefully choose your words.

Well, this is what Jesus, we see almost a transition now in the way Jesus begins to talk to his disciples.

He begins to talk to them like friends.

He begins to talk to them like brothers.

And it's really powerful the way Jesus begins to interact with them and answer their questions.

And we begin to see this in John 13.

And also in John 13, Jesus confronts Peter and says, You're going to deny me three times.

And of course, Peter said, No, I won't.

And of course, eight hours later he did.

And so that's all in John 13.

That's almost impossible to speak all of those messages.

So we're going to be here about an hour and a half this morning.

I just want to tell you that up front.

Actually, we're going to go very quickly, but I'm going to pull out some things today that I believe the Lord has been revealing to me about John 13.

And if you look there in John 13, verse 13, we're going to read here about Jesus.

John 13:13

Now he's about to wash their feet.

He's about to get the disciples around him.

He's about to start washing their feet.

And listen to what he says.

You call me teacher and Lord, and you are right, because it is true.

And since I, the Lord and teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash each other's feet.

I have given you an example to follow.

Do as I have done to you.

Now, if you're reading along in your Bible, I want you to make special note of what Jesus just said.

Jesus just said, Do the things that I've done to you.

In other words, follow my example.

Now let's look at verse 34 and 35.

It says, we're about to hear now, by the way, this next two scriptures is what most people call the 11th commandment.

Jesus gives us an 11th commandment, and here it is.

So now I am giving you a new commandment.

Now, remember, all these men were raised under the Mosaic law, under the Levitical law, where they understood the law.

They understood the Ten Commandments.

They've been taught all their life about the Ten Commandments.

So for Jesus to say, I'm about to give you a new commandment, suddenly their ears, they said, something big's about to happen.

And it did.

I give you a new commandment.

Love each other.

Just as I have loved you, you should love each other.

And your love for one another will prove to the world that you're my disciples.

Now I want you to understand something this morning.

Loving each other and the command to love each other was not a new commandment to the disciples.

In fact, in Leviticus, there is an Old Testament law that says to love your neighbor, to love each other.

So that's not new to the disciples.

Can I tell you what happened that morning that caused the earthquake in their hearts to begin?

And by the way, the tremors of that earthquake are being felt today in the church.

Here's what he said.

He didn't say it, he said more than there's two parts of this revelation.

The first part was to love each other.

Then the second part was the way I've loved you.

In fact, this is what he was saying to his disciples.

From this day forward, I'm giving you a new commandment.

Love each other the way I have loved you.

And I'm about to give you some examples.

In fact, the next day he would give us the ultimate example of his love.

He would lay down his life for them.

And he would lay down his life for you and I.

It was the ultimate example of love.

There is no greater story about love than when Jesus gave his life for us.

And he said, listen, from this day forward, love each other the way I have loved you.

You see, we have this idea of what loving one another means, but Jesus said, look, forget about all of that.

I'm going to give you the example.

I'm going to show you how to do it.

Do it the way I've been doing it.

And forget all your ideas of love.

In fact, many of us in this room have a false idea of what love is.

We don't understand that love is more than just physical touch.

It's more than just having good feelings when you're around one another.

Love is serving one another, caring for one another.

I'm going to tell you there's 35 things in the Bible, just in the New Testament alone, that specifically tell us how to love one another.

So John, in John 13, something tremored in his heart.

He caught it.

His eyes were open.

In fact, in John 13, he calls himself the disciple whom Jesus loved.

And then he begins to tell about how to love other people.

He begins, it's to spew out of him.

And for the rest of his life, John spews this message out of his heart.

The new commandment was, love each other the way Jesus loved us.

Now in John 15, Jesus purposely repeats himself.

Look at John 15, verse 12.

John 15:12

It says, I command you to love each other in the same way that I love you.

Again, he repeats, not just love each other, but follow my example.

Now look at John 15, verse 17.

John 15:17

He repeats himself again.

I command you to love each other.

This is not an option.

It's not a request.

It's not something you do when all the things are going well in your day, when traffic's been great, when you arrived at work on time, when the coffee was good.

This is not just a suggestion.

The Lord Jesus is telling us something very strongly here.

This is a command.

Love each other.

I'm not making this up.

Jesus said, do it.

And then he goes on.

Paul caught this.

Paul caught this revelation in Ephesians 5, verse 2.

Ephesians 5:2

Live a life filled with love for others, following the example of Christ.

You see both parts here.

Throughout Scripture, we see both parts.

The apostles, the disciples, they all caught this new revelation.

We're not just supposed to love people, but love them like Jesus, who loved you and gave himself as a sacrifice to take away our sins.

Now we know that John, later on, he wrote the book of 1, 2nd, and 3 John and the book of Revelation.

So he writes five books of the New Testament.

About 20% of the New Testament is written by John.

When he was a very old man, in fact, in the latter, some people say in the last two to three years of his life, at the end of the first century, John wrote 1, 2nd, and 3 John.

And so he's an old man.

He has caught this revelation.

He has lived it out.

He's expressed it all of his life.

And you remember the story that Pastor Robert told, that historians believe that at the end of his life he would come and sit in the temple, and John was the last living apostle.

He was the last man to die that had walked with Jesus.

And he was the only one to die a natural death.

So John would come and sit in the temple, and they would beg him to teach.

They would beg him to tell stories about Jesus, but he would simply just shake his head, and finally, if they begged him enough, he would come forward to the front of the temple, and here's what he would say.

My dear children.

Can you see your granddad saying, talking to you like this?

You know, you could be in your forties or fifties, and some older person calls you a child and it means something.

And this is what he would do.

He would come forward, he'd walk real slowly to the front of the temple, he'd sit down, he'd turn and look at the crowd and say, My dear children, love one another.

And then he would get back up real slowly and walk slowly out the back of the temple.

Well, finally they said, John, why is it that that's the only thing you say?

Why is it that that is all the revelation you can give us about the Lord?

And John would say, because that's what he wanted you to catch.

That's what our Lord and Savior taught.

That was the essence of who he was.

That was his command before he left.

Love one another.

And so listen to what he says in 1 John chapter 4.

1 John 4 · chapter mention

This is John writing the book.

It says, verse 8, but anyone who does not know God, who does not love, does not know God.

For God is love.

And God showed how much he loved us by sending his only son into the world so that we might have eternal life through him.

And this is real love.

It's not that we love God, but that he loved us and sent his son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.

Dear friends, since God loved us that much, we surely ought to love each other.

No one has ever seen God, but if we love each other, God lives in us, and his love has been brought to full expression through us.

Now listen, today I'm trying to help you discover the proof if you're a disciple or not.

And there's only one proof, there's only one shred of evidence that can convict you of being a disciple of the Lord Jesus, and that is your love for other people.

This is not more complicated than this.

It's not that you wear a name badge, it's not that you lead a life group or host a life group or teach Sunday school, it's not that you visit the sick in the hospital.

Those are all good things.

That's more evidence that you're a member of a church, though, than a disciple of Jesus Christ.

The only proof that Scripture offers us, if you're wanting to prove to someone that you're a disciple, a follower of Jesus Christ, the only proof that Scripture gives us is that is our love for other people.

If you love other people, that's the proof the world's looking for to determine whether or not you're really a believer and a disciple, a follower of Jesus Christ.

This is how simple it is.

If you're a disciple of Jesus Christ, you're gonna look like Jesus Christ.

Some of us are more of disciples of some pastor or denomination than we are of Jesus.

Is that right?

Because if we are disciples of Jesus, we're gonna act like Jesus.

We're gonna look like Jesus, we're gonna talk like Jesus, we're gonna love people the way Jesus loved people.

And there's no other proof.

And so the one undeniable piece of evidence that will authenticate our position as believers and disciples in Jesus Christ is our unqualified love for other people.

If you don't remember one thing about this message, please remember that if you want to discover the proof in your life, it's your love for other people that will convict you of being a disciple.

Right now in America, church attendance, by the way, is dwindling and falling off at a faster rate than any other time in American history.

At the end of this year, at the end of 2003, we will close 8,000 churches and they'll never open again.

8,000 churches will close their doors in the year 2003, literally going out of business never to open their doors again.

Thirty years ago, there were 27 churches for every 10,000 people in America.

Today there's 11 churches for every 10,000 people in America.

Now I know we live in a Bible Belt.

Dallas Fort Worth is blessed.

We're the buckle of the Bible Belt here.

We're in the center of it.

And it seems like to us that there's a church on every corner, and that's true for this area.

But all you have to do is travel to the East Coast or travel to the Northwest, travel to Southern California, travel to other places, and there is a drought of churches.

All you have to be, in fact, to grow a big church right now is to open your doors and have some semblance of help, and you can attract people.

I know people call us all the time.

When Pastor Robert is on TV, we get phone calls and emails from all over the country asking us, where can I find a healthy church in my area?

They're begging, pleading.

Where are the churches?

Where are churches that preach like that?

Where are the churches that preach Jesus uncompromised, that allow the Spirit to move among them?

Where are the churches that have a passion for the lost?

They're not there.

They're going away every day.

And you know why?

Because there's no proof that we're disciples.

Why would I, as an unbeliever, want to go to a church where no one's loving each other?

And listen, we no longer live in the modern age.

For the last 40 years, since World War II, in fact, the last 50 to 60 years has been considered the modern age of America, where we became a modern country.

But at the turn of the century, sociologists now say that we're in a different age, and it's called a postmodern age.

Can I tell you what postmodern believers want?

Or most postmodern people, by the way, if you're under the age of 30, you're considered to be a part of the postmodern generation.

And you know what they want?

The number one need, as identified by sociologists for the postmodern generation, is to have a place where they can experience authentic community.

Where people are real, where people are not religious, where people are not, where they're just real people, really loving each other, and where there's community.

For example, I don't know if you ever watch uh TV.

I don't recommend you watch any of it, but there's a show that's really popular, and it's called Friends.

It's been on the air now for about ten years.

It's considered to be the most popular show on television.

And it's about six people that live life together.

And you know why that captures the attention of the postmodern generation?

You know why that uh that just simply grabs them and that's what they want?

They just want to be around a group of small groups of people that love each other, that honestly care about each other, and yes, it's full of sin.

That show's full of sin, and all those things are terrible, but at least they're together, at least they're committed to one another, and at least they're expressing what they consider real love to one another.

When we have real love, the church is the one that's experienced real love.

The churches I grew up in didn't look like church.

It looked like a Jerry Springer show when I grew up.

I used to go to church just to see the fight.

I'm being serious.

You know that we had, I can't tell you all the pastors.

I have no idea who my pastors were growing up because we had a new one every 18 months.

In fact, I heard so many adults tell me growing up, listen, don't get too close to the pastor because he's not going to be there very long anyway.

And I would watch as the congregation would vote to remove a pastor, and I would see pastors and their wives leave, literally, get up in a congregation like this, and walk out the back door being rejected by the congregation, the pastor's wife crying her eyes out, the children crying because they were having to leave their friends, that would be on a Sunday, by Tuesday morning, their house was packed and they were out of town.

Now, I'm telling you, that didn't happen one time, if it happened four or five times that I can remember.

And let me tell you something.

Growing up in a church like that, I realized there was no love in that church.

The only reason I'm a follower of Jesus Christ today is because there was a love in my home for Jesus.

My mom and dad demonstrated the love of the Lord to me.

I saw it in my mom's eyes, I saw it in my dad's eyes, I saw it in the way they treated one another.

I saw a real expression of the love of Jesus in my home, but I didn't see it at church.

And I want to tell you something.

If you grew up in a church like that or your children had just come from a church like that, I want to apologize.

I am so sorry that you've had to experience that.

And I want to make you a guarantee today, it won't be like that here.

This is going to be a place where your children grow up and experience the love of other people and where they have a chance to love other people, where they can find authentic community, where they grow up and the stories they tell won't be the stories that I just told.

They'll tell stories of being in a life group, of being with other people that loved them and cared for them and prayed for them.

Those are the stories that your children need to tell.

And we need to get rid of our history.

We just need to start over because what we've been doing is not working.

The church is not working the way it's working right now.

It's a broken thing.

We need to fix it.

Can I tell you how we fix it?

We start loving one another today.

And you make up your mind in the room today, we're going to love one another unconditionally, with all of our heart and all of our mind.

I'm going to love other people.

And here's the number one reason.

And our love for other people is the key to influencing unbelievers.

Look at John 13, 35.

It says, Your love for one another will prove to the world that you're my disciples.

Here's what's happening.

A lot of times I go walking through my neighborhood.

I know you can't tell, but I walk a lot, so that I can eat whatever I want.

It's kind of a trade-off.

And so when I walk, when people's windows and doors are open, I know I always look in.

I go down the sidewalk, I look in.

Now I won't get arrested for that, but I will get arrested if I do this.

Is that right?

That's what the world's doing right now to your life.

They're doing this.

You call yourself a Christian?

Okay.

Are you for real?

Are you really a believer?

Are you authentic?

Are you the follower of Jesus Christ?

You say you are.

But here's what they're doing.

I'm going to watch you for a while.

I'm going to look inside.

I'm going to see, do you love people?

Do you treat your boss well?

Do you gossip when everyone, no one else is around?

I'm watching you.

How do you treat your coworkers?

How do you talk to your wife on the phone?

I'm going to find out if you're authentic.

And if you are, I want to hear what you have to say.

If you're not, I don't want you.

I don't want to be religious.

People don't want to be religious anymore.

Thank the Lord.

But they do want authenticity.

They want to be around authentic disciples of Jesus Christ who look, act, and talk like Jesus.

And listen to 1 Corinthians 13, verses 1, 2, and 3.

1 Corinthians 13:1

And remember, we read the scripture all the time.

We think it's talking about spiritual gifts.

It's not.

It's talking about love.

Listen to this.

If I could speak in any language in heaven or on earth but didn't love others, I would only be making meaningless noise like a loud gong or a clanging cymbal.

If I had the gift of prophecy and if I knew all the mysteries of the future and knew everything about everything, but did not love others, what good would I be?

And if I had the gift of faith so that I could speak to a mountain and make it move, without love, I would be no good to anybody.

And if I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrifice my body, I could boast about it, I could tell others about it, I could go on TVN and talk about it, I wouldn't be any good to any of anyone.

I would be of no value whatsoever.

Can I tell you something this morning that your spiritual gifts do not make you spiritual?

They don't.

Can I tell you what makes you spiritual?

The fruit that you're producing today.

And the first fruit mentioned in Galatians 5 is what?

Love.

You're only spiritual if you're producing spiritual fruit.

You're only a hamburger if you have a bun on either side of you.

And you're only spiritual if you're producing the fruits of the Spirit.

Is that right?

Just because I have gifts, just because I can prophesy and I get to minister prophetically a lot.

But if when I stop loving people, I'm going to stop ministering.

And by the way, if you're in the in the room this morning and you've been praying for an outpouring of the Holy Spirit upon your life, if you've been praying for more spiritual gifts, can I tell you that if you don't have unqualified love for other people, if you're not passionately in love with God's people and with unbelievers, stop praying for spiritual gifts.

Pray that you love people.

And when you begin loving people, God will pour out an abundance of his spiritual gifts upon your life.

So much that you will not be able to contain it.

You will not be able to receive the abundance of God's power upon your life when you passionately, supernaturally, unequivocally fall in love with other people.

The spirit of the gifts, the gifts, all the gifts, as many as you want, as much as you want, will fall upon your life when you love other people.

When you begin to serve other people, help other people, when you begin to think of others instead of yourself, God will release his gifts upon you.

In fact, I believe God in his mercy does not give us spiritual gifts until we do love people.

Because when we have gifts without love, we're simply dangerous.

Is that right?

Listen, I'm preaching a lot better than you're amening.

And if you'll amen, I'll move a little quicker, okay?

Let's keep a good faith here.

America is the most loved-starved country on the earth right now.

In fact, there was a an anthropologist who was studying the Hopi Indians.

And when you go into, if you've ever been to Northeast Arizona where the Hopi Indians used to live, it's dry, barren.

I mean, it is dry.

They live up on mesas that are just completely bone-dry.

Yet when you study their culture, and they've been a culture for about a thousand years, when you study their culture, all their poetry, all their art on their cave walls, everything is about rain.

It's about water and about rain.

And finally this anthropologist stopped and he talked to this chief, this leader of the tribe, and said, How come all you talk about is rain?

You get two inches of rain a year, and all y'all talk about, all you sing about is rain.

And the wise chief said, Because it's what we desire the most.

Is that why you Americans sing about love all the time?

Everything we sing about, everything we write about, every show that you watch on television is about people looking for love.

Because we're starved for it.

Unbelievers are starving for what you have.

God has poured out the richness of his grace and abundance of his love upon our lives.

Why can't we take a cup of it and hand it to somebody who's an unbeliever and show them, by the way, that it's for them as well?

Here's another reason.

You know, for example, I've heard messages like this all my life.

How do you love one another?

It's like eating an elephant.

Where do you start with the case?

I mean, how do you do this?

In fact, in fact, if I took a poll today, and how many of you like to love people more, you'd all raise your hand.

You all want to love more.

But we don't know how.

We don't know the practical steps of loving someone.

And if you'll look inside your bulletin today, I gave you 35 one-anothers in Scripture.

Now, Pastor Robert brags about all the scripture he puts in his message.

He didn't put 35.

And you tell him that Byron said that, okay?

But if you'll look at this list, all of these happen after John 13.

Because I want you to know something.

The disciples caught something.

An earthquake happened that day in that room when Jesus gave the 11th commandment.

All of these scriptures, they either start in John 13 and happen after John 13 in your Bible because something spread and began to happen.

People caught this revelation.

These one another are the practical ways that we love people.

And I'm not going to cover all 35 of them this morning, but I want to give you two of them.

One of them is prefer one another.

Prefer one another.

Romans 12, verse 10 says, In honor, give preference to one another.

Romans 12:10

You know, for thousands of years, people believed that the earth was the center of the universe and that the sun and all of the galaxies.

And all the planets and stars rotated around the earth.

For hundreds of years.

Scientists believed that.

Can you imagine the first scientists who discovered that the earth was not the center of the universe?

But actually the earth was a part of a much bigger galaxy that simply circled the sun.

Now I have some revelation for you this morning.

Not only is the earth not the center of the universe, neither are you.

And neither am I.

And when you catch this revelation, it'll save your marriage.

I believe there are some of you in the room right now that what I'm about to tell you is going to save your marriage.

You know, in all my years of marriage counseling, I've never had two people come into my office and say, listen, every morning I wake up and all I want to do is serve her.

And all she wants to do is serve me.

We get up and think and act and look for ways to serve one another.

And this is never going to work.

We've had enough of this.

I can't take it another minute.

I can't take her serving me anymore.

Make her stop.

I've never heard that.

In fact, every couple that I've ever counseled that went through a divorce, there's at least one selfish person involved, and most of the time, too.

Selfish people cannot stay married.

Because they don't prefer one another.

They think that they're the center of the universe and everyone needs to be sucked into their orbit eventually.

I'm here today to tell you that this is you read the Bible, you'll know that it's more about other people than about you.

It's not about you.

The more you become a disciple of Jesus Christ, the more you think like him and talk like him and act like him, the more you will realize I've got to prefer other people.

Jesus said, listen, don't call me teacher and Lord, I call you friends.

I'm here as your friend.

Don't worship me, worship the Father in heaven.

And this is, let me tell you how to do this, alright?

Here's some real practical ways.

If you want to prefer other people, including your spouse, let me tell you some real practical things.

Number one, take the initiative to discover what other people like and dislike.

Do you even know what your spouse likes and not what she dislikes or what he disliked?

Let me tell you something in our house.

Here's some real things that Pam and I do.

And we've been married 14 years, 14 semi-glorious years.

We've worked as hard at it as the rest of you.

It hasn't been heaven every day, but it's been great.

And you know what?

Being married, I will never do anything more significant in ministry than be married to my wife.

It is the most significant thing that I will ever do on this earth is to be married to Pam and to be a father to my two children.

And by the way, it's the most significant thing you'll ever do for the Lord.

And here's how we prefer one another.

My wife, we have a little system set up at our house.

She loves to sleep late on Saturday morning.

And I'm an early person.

So on Saturday morning, this has happened, I mean, for years.

I can't tell you how many years this has happened.

On Saturday morning, especially since we've had kids, she sleeps late.

I get up, I take care of the kids, I cook breakfast, I take care of the kids.

She sleeps as late as she wants.

I don't care how long she sleeps.

And then Saturday, about 1, 1.30, I get to take a nap.

I'm telling you, this is a great life.

We're the most boring human beings you've ever met on Saturday.

I'm pretty rocking on Saturday night, but Saturday I'm boring.

By design.

And this is the way we prefer one another.

We prefer, we know what she likes and what she dislikes.

And I make sure that she gets what she likes.

She makes sure that I get what I like.

And we just we get into this contest.

It's wonderful.

It's unbelievable.

Preferring one another brings anointing and favor to our marriage.

Here's another thing.

Encourage people to talk about themselves.

When you're around other people, listen, say less about yourself, and you need to have a list of six or seven questions that you ask every person.

For example, here's the question: Are you married?

Do you have children?

Where do you work?

What do you like to do for fun?

Where do you live?

See any movies lately?

You ask them about them.

Get them talking about them.

This is the way that you prefer one another.

This is the way that you gather friends.

Listen, can I tell you why I'm doing all this?

I want a huge funeral.

I'm serious.

I want it to be expensive and gaudy.

I want the police to come and shut it down because the parking lot is too full.

I want it to go on and on and on.

I'm not lying.

This is the deal.

I don't want people just to show up because they think they're in the will and there's an attorney sitting there and they can't wait for it to get over and him to divvy up whatever I have.

Don't you want to give something away?

Don't you want to impact someone?

Don't you want to bless someone?

Don't you want to create people around you that love you and care for you and you care for them?

Isn't that what we really want?

This is how you do it.

Here's another thing when you're in a group of people, include everyone in the conversation.

The other day I was at a party and I was talking to some people that were, some guys that I know.

I've known them for years.

I like them and we're friends, and we were talking, we were just sharing stuff, talking, having a good time.

And out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a man, a young man our age, sitting over by himself.

And I left our group and said, excuse me, I walk over, and here's what I did.

I asked him those five questions.

Hey, what's your name?

Hey, where do you work?

Hey, are you married?

Are those your kids?

What are your kids that how old are they?

I just asked them all those questions.

I said, hey, come over here.

I want to introduce you to somebody.

And I put my hand on his back and I led him over to the group, and here's what I did.

I said, hey, I want you all to meet so-and-so.

And he's got this many kids.

He works here.

He does this.

He, he, he, he, he.

And I introduced him to all the group.

Now, guess what?

He left that meeting that day knowing that he had been preferred and included.

And guess what?

He'll come back.

Because it was about him.

It was about gathering people, gathering visitors, gathering people who were standing off to the side, gathering them in.

This is what Jesus would have done.

He would have gone over and gathered somebody and then brought them over and introduced them, preferring one another.

Wouldn't it be great to be at a church where we preferred one another, where it wasn't about our needs, or it wasn't about us, it was about everyone else around us.

And if everyone had that mindset, guess what?

You would never get, you would always be blessed.

Because people would prefer you too.

You'd get to tell all your stuff.

You'd get to talk about you because people would be asking you.

Right?

But you start it.

Here's another thing.

Encourage one another.

1 Thessalonians 5, verse 11.

1 Thessalonians 5:11

So encourage each other and build each other up just as you are already doing.

You know, let me tell you how you encourage people.

This is very simple.

Here's the first thing.

Encourage people when they've become weary and well-doing.

You know, sometimes people get tired of doing the right thing.

And you need to come along beside them.

Sometimes your children are doing so well in school.

They are standing up to peer pressure.

They're doing well in school.

And sometimes as a parent, you need, in fact, on a daily basis, I believe, you need to walk along beside them and say, you know, you're doing so good.

I'm so proud of the way you're doing it.

I'm so you're you're great at what you're doing.

You need to tell your spouse, thank you, that every day I don't have to worry about these things.

You're doing these things so well.

Listen, ladies, let me tell you what your husband is starving to hear from you.

Let me tell you.

Pam's great at this.

Brady, thank you so much for providing.

I never worry about being provided for.

Thank you so much for working hard.

You're such a hard worker.

I'm so grateful that I never have to worry about things in our house because you're going to provide.

You're going to work.

Thank you, Brady, for being successful at work and providing for our home.

Listen, ladies, your husband's starving to hear that from you.

And if you've not told him that, you need to tell him today and mean it.

Because this is the way you encourage.

They're doing the right thing.

In fact, our spouses are doing more right things than wrong things.

Would you not agree?

Some of you are not shaking your head, but I understand.

They are.

Here's another way.

Encourage people when they seem to be unfocused, confused, or unmotivated.

You know that it's hard to get out of a rut by yourself.

Sometimes people need you to come along beside them and tell them, you know what, you can get a better job.

You can get out of debt.

You can communicate with your teenager.

You can do it.

You can come along beside them.

Sometimes people are going through change, and it's hard.

Encourage people when they're going through changes.

When they're changing jobs, when they're buying a new house, when they're doing something different.

Go along beside them and encourage them to go for it.

Here's the last thing encourage people to dream.

The other day I was meeting with a man and he revealed to me, and I've known this man for years, and I didn't know this about him.

He said, you know what?

I want to write a book.

I want to write a book.

And he began to tell me the manuscript that he already had planned out and the material.

And he had gone through extensive research and he was ready to write his book, but he lacked the confidence to start.

And now when I see him, I said, Hey, you started that book yet?

You're writing that book yet?

Man, you need to write that book.

I can't wait.

And by the way, I want a copy of that book.

Encourage people to dream.

Husbands and wives, do you know what your spouse is dreaming about?

I'm dreaming of taking a nap next Saturday at 1 o'clock.

Serious.

I'm not complicated.

I know you knew that, but I'm not complicated.

And neither are you.

You have simple dreams.

And if you don't know your spouse's dreams, you can't help them fulfill it.

You can't help them get there.

You can't touch.

By the way, their dreams are the most precious thing to them.

They're just the treasure of their heart.

And when you discover what your wife's or husband's dreams are, and when you start helping them get there, man, they start serving you back.

It's unbelievable.

But if you don't know what they're dreaming about, you can't do this.

Find out what people are dreaming about.

I've heard people tell me recently, I want to write a book, I want to travel to Europe, I want to start my own business, I want to finish my college degree, I want enough money to retire.

These are all things that my friends have told me recently.

And when I hear them, my ears perk up because it's a chance for me now to encourage them.

And I make note of it.

See, I made note of it.

It's written down right here.

Those are things that my closest friends have told me personally and privately lately.

And now when I see them, I'm going to encourage them about it.

And guess what?

I know I'm dreaming too.

I've got big dreams.

And they know them and they talk to me about them.

Listen, this is fun.

This is easy.

Loving each other is not like eating an elephant, just doing these simple things.

Preferring one another and encouraging one another.

But here's the final point this morning is we can only love others when we know that we are loved.

You know, John said, I am the disciple whom Jesus loved.

In John 13, he said that.

And also he writes down, Your love for one another will prove to the world that you're my disciples.

See, the reason John was able to write volumes about love, it's because John the disciple, John the Apostle, knew he was loved.

Now I want you to take you to a story in John 13.

Let's go back there real quickly to verse 6.

Now remember, Jesus has all the disciples, he has them all, it says very specifically, he had them all sit down, and he was going around washing each of their feet.

And here's something I want you to notice if you read John 13, he washed the feet of Judas as well.

Judas, who, by the way, took his sandals and put them on a pair of clean feet that Jesus had just washed and walked out the door and went and collected his 30 pieces of silver.

That's a lesson about how you treat your enemies and how you treat people that despitefully use you and talk evil of you.

You still wash their feet.

And Jesus washed the feet of Jesus, knowing full well the intentions of Judas's heart.

And so here's what happened next.

And listen, he comes to Peter, and Peter's always trying to perform in front of Jesus.

You look in front of Scripture, he's trying to perform in front of Jesus, always trying to do things and perform, trying to earn the love of God.

And look at the exchange between Jesus and Peter.

When he came to Simon Peter, Peter said to him, Lord, why are you going to wash my feet?

And Jesus replied, You don't understand now why I'm doing it, but someday you will.

No, Peter protested, you will never wash my feet.

Now, that's strong.

Peter wasn't known to be real gracious anyway, but Peter said, Lord, you're not washing my feet.

Now he had just washed all the other disciples' feet, and he comes to Peter.

Peter said, You're not washing my feet.

Can I tell you that some of you in the room today had said that to the Lord?

But here's what you said.

Lord, you can't love me the way you love other people.

There's no way.

I can't let you love me the way you seem to love little children or missionaries or people who are sick.

You can't love me that way.

Lord, have you been paying attention to what I'm saying and what I'm thinking lately?

Do you understand what I've been saying?

Do you know who I am, Lord?

Now you believe that he's the Messiah.

And see, Peter knew he was the Messiah.

Peter had been one of the first ones to say, Lord, you're the Messiah.

You're the Christ, the Son of the living God.

And Jesus said, You're on this rock, I'll build my church.

I mean, he had no trouble confessing that he was the Messiah.

Unlike many of us, we don't have any trouble knowing that Jesus is our Savior.

The problem we have is receiving his love.

Can I tell you how you know if you're a good receiver or not?

I remember the day that this happened to me.

When people used to give me compliments, like they'd say, that's a nice looking shirt.

I would go into this long explanation about how I'd gotten the shirt, where I'd gotten it, the price I paid for it, and just to throw any, I would just I would just shield myself from compliments.

And finally this lady confronted me one day and said, Brady, why can't you just say thank you?

And it dawned on me, my eyes opened.

I can't receive compliments.

I can't receive the love of the Lord.

Let me tell you how you know if you have a heart that's willing to receive.

When people try to bless you, here's all you need to say.

Thank you.

By the way, if you take me to lunch and offer to pay, I'm gonna let you.

I'm serious.

I'll say thank you.

Thank you very much.

I'm not gonna wrestle with you over it.

I by the way, I went to the lunch wanting to pay myself, but if you're offering, great.

Thank you.

May the Lord bless you.

That's awesome.

I'll go to lunch with you more often.

Honestly, can you receive a blessing?

When people try to bless you, when people try to do things for you, when people try to come and help you and serve you, when people ask you, can I do anything for you?

You never let them.

Sometimes you need to say, Yes, I'll let you help me.

Here's something you can do for me.

And thank you.

Thank you, Lord.

See, all you need to say today to the Lord is this.

Thank you.

Thank you, Lord.

We just spent thirty minutes saying thank you to the Lord in worship, right?

Were you saying thank you because you've been good all week?

Or are you saying thank you because he's been good all week?

He's been good all week.

And I say thank you for that.

At the tomb of the unknown soldier in Washington, D.C.

at the Arlington National Cemetery, there's a guard on duty 24 hours a day at this tomb of the unknown soldier.

And every hour, on the hour, a new guard comes and takes the place of the old guard.

And when they come together, the old guard who's been there for the past hour guarding the tomb, the two guards salute, and the man who's been there for the past hour says, orders remain unchanged.

They've been saying that 24 hours a day for as long as there's been a tomb of the unknown soldier.

That's all they say.

They salute one another, and they say, orders remain unchanged.

And the new guard takes his place for the full hour.

Two thousand years ago, our commander in chief, the Lord Jesus, came and said, A new commandment I give you.

Love one another.

And this morning