The Reason For Reconciliation (August 13th, 2017) - Jason Lock

Well, friends, we're over the next two weeks, I have the privilege of being here with you, opening up God's Word.

And over the next two weeks, we are going to be considering a small letter in the New Testament written from the Apostle Paul to a friend of his, Philemon.

So I would invite you to open up your Bibles now to Philemon.

There's one chapter, and we're going to be considering today verse one to verse 11.

And what as we study this book, uh, we're going to be narrowing our focus to consider relationships and specifically relationships in the church.

Those who you uh give your handshake this morning, your relationship with them, uh, your relationship with your small group leader, your relationship with your small group member, your relationship with your spouse and your kids.

My wife and I have been able to do a lot of traveling up north to different places uh this summer, and I noticed something often when I passed small fire stations in little rural commit uh communities.

Around small fire stations, they often have this um fire, forest fire hazard signs that judge the um uh caution that we should have about daytime uh burning.

And it's a pretty easy scale to figure out if there's a hazard for forest fires.

Uh green is low, and then it increases from green to yellow to orange and to red.

And this summer, every time I've gone up, I've only seen green.

And that's because you guys know it's been like a cool and kind of a wet summer, a lot of rain, but um not out in BC has it been like that this year.

Um uh this summer, out in BC, it wouldn't have been the uh low green warning.

You guys probably know that out in BC has been high red warnings.

Actually, right now, they've continued a state of emergency in BC because of the raging forest fires that are consuming that province.

I looked online this morning to figure out exactly how much it is.

There were reports of 971 separate fires having already consumed 651,000 hectares of forest.

I didn't know what a hectare was, so I'd have to figure that out.

Um think of a 400-meter track.

The space inside that track, one hectare.

We're studying about relationships in the church because although we may have been burned by someone that we thought should love us or we trusted, although we may have been burned and hurt, hurt happens, but reconciliation is right.

Hurt happens, but reconciliation is right.

And Lord willing, over the next two weeks, the book of Philemon is going to reveal to us both the reasons for reconciliation and the road that we must follow to gain reconciliation.

Today, we're gonna consider the first 11 verses of Philemon and we're gonna see the reasons.

What are the reasons for reconciliation?

So, uh, given this, let's read the first few verses together, verse 1 to 11.

This is God's word.

It speaks to us today, and this is what it says.

Paul, a prisoner for Christ Jesus, and Timothy, our brother, to Philemon, our beloved fellow worker, and Aphia, our sister, and Archipus, our fellow soldier, and the church in your house.

Grace to you, and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

I thank my God always when I remember you in my prayers, because I hear of your love and of the faith that you have towards the Lord Jesus and for all the saints, and I pray that the sharing of your faith may become effective for the full knowledge of every good thing that is in us for the sake of Christ.

For I have derived much joy and comfort from your love, my brother, because the hearts of the saints have been refreshed through you.

Accordingly, though I am bold enough in Christ to command you to do what is required, yet for love's sake I prefer to appeal to you.

I, Paul, an old man, and now a prisoner also for Christ Jesus, I appeal to you for my child, Onesimus, whose father I became in my imprisonment.

Formerly he was useless to you, but now indeed he is useful to you and to me.

Alright, so let me lay out the landscape for you.

Why is Paul writing this letter to Philemon?

Well, he did because he was asking his friend to do a hard thing.

Paul was asking Philemon to reconcile with a man who had hurt him, a man named Onesimus.

Onesimus was a slave that worked in Philemon's house.

But at some point, Onesimus deserted his master, and when we continue to read, we'll learn that in the process he likely stole something from his master as he was leaving.

After Onesimus deserted Philemon, though somehow, maybe not somehow, maybe more by the providence of God, Philemon actually was introduced to the Apostle Paul.

And at the time the Apostle Paul was in house arrest, but he was allowed to meet with people during that time.

Onesimus met Paul.

Paul introduced Onesimus to Jesus, and Onesimus repented of his sins and believed in Jesus Christ.

He became saved.

And as many of you know, when we put our faith in Jesus, many, if not all, of our perspectives about life in the past changes.

I used to think this way, now I think that way.

I used to think this was wrong, now I know this is right.

I used to think this was right, now I know that's wrong.

This used to attract me, now I detest it.

This I used to used to detest me, now I'm attracted.

Everything changes.

And Onesimus' mind changed.

He recognized what he did was wrong, and he needed to go back and make things right.

So Paul sent this man Onesimus with a letter to deliver to the man who he hurt to look in his eyes and tell him, I'm sorry.

And Paul was asking Philemon to forgive him.

See, that's what reconciliation is.

Reconciliation is mending a broken relationship.

Who amongst us has not been hurt by others and even hurt those whom he love most?

Failing to reconcile, um, uh failing to reconcile is the reason that like your favorite band doesn't make your favorite band's music anymore.

But successfully reconciling is the maybe the reason that your favorite band might go on a reunion tour concert in ten years from now.

And some of you can finally hear one direction together again.

Failing to reconcile may be the reason that you no longer speak with that pastor from your old church, or an ext an estranged child, or even your own parents.

Successfully reconciling is the reason that you will be brought back and received without condition to someone that you hurt, or someone that you hurt you, an old pastor, a small group leader, a child, a parent.

Successful reconciliation is gospel oriented.

Successful reconciliation is gospel-oriented, and it is the only way that we can mend our relationships with that friend, that old pastor, that child, that parent, that spouse.

And be sure reconciliation will only be successful if it is gospel-oriented.

Because, brothers and sisters in Christ, we forgive because he forgave us.

As Christians, reconciliation is right because by faith we've been reconciled to God in Christ Jesus.

This is true.

Every human being, myself and yourself, every human being is born into this world with a nature that is corrupt and cursed by sin.

And because of our inherited corrupt and cursed nature, before God, we are born as aliens and strangers and enemies.

And there is nothing that we can do to earn God's favor otherwise.

But, friends, Jesus offers favor with God.

A cursed, corrupt man, cursed, corrupt woman who is an alien and a stranger and an enemy of God is under God's wrath.

But the gracious Son of God, Jesus Christ, suffered God's wrath in our place.

He suffered for our sins so we could be saved from our sins.

If you believed in Jesus, you are no longer an alien, a stranger, or an enemy.

You are a friend.

A child.

A citizen of heaven, transferred from the kingdom of darkness into the kingdom of light.

Once you had no hope, once you were apart from God, now by faith, you're reconciled back to the God who made you.

Have you been reconciled?

Believe in Jesus today, and you will be transferred from that enemy to a friend.

Believe in Jesus today, and you will not be a spiritual orphan.

You will be a beloved child.

The gospel is the reason by which we are reconciled.

Everyone experiences hurt.

Hurt happens.

But reconciliation is right.

So I think each of us today would find themselves in one of these three circumstances.

We are in the either, some of us, hurt has happened situation.

Hurt has happened, but by the grace of God, I reconciled with that person, and it's in the past.

And friends, isn't it good when a relationship is finally mended and the burden is finally lifted?

It is such a sweet grace.

Maybe you're in that category, hurt has happened.

Well, be sure all of us will be in this category, hurt will happen.

Hurt will happen.

And if if you're naive to think otherwise in the church, then you'll probably church hop for the rest of your life.

If you're naive to think that hurt will never happen in the church, you'll never settle down.

And you'll never have the blessing of enjoying true, spirit-filled, gospel-oriented community.

Yet some of you right now, today, woke up with a big burden on your soul shoulder.

Because it's not the hurt has happened or hurt will happen.

You're in the hurt is happening.

And it feels like you've just been seared by someone that you trusted.

Today we're considering the reasons to reconcile.

And it might be hard.

Those of you who are in this hurt is happening now circumstance, um, you may know that you need to get up, but you're not getting up and going to reconcile, even though that chair that you sit on feels like it's embedded with tax on every square inch.

For the sake of the gospel and the name of Jesus, we need to know how to reconcile within the church.

And to help us get there, the heart of Philemon will show us why we should adopt these reasons.

You see, the reasons that Paul had for reconciliation were pretty simple.

I'll give you a couple of them near the end of the sermon, and they're not hard to understand, but you won't adopt them if you don't have the same heart for the church that Philemon had for his church.

Before we look at the simple reasons for reconciliation, we need to consider this crucial question, friends.

What kind of church do you want to be a part of?

If we don't care about Jesus and his church, we won't care about each other and we'll never reconcile.

If we don't invest into Jesus and His church, we won't value each other and we'll never reconcile.

What kind of church do you want to be a part of?

Lord willing, I want to have the same kind of heart that Philemon did.

And I hope you do too.

Let's look at Philemon's uh heart for his church.

First, if you're taking notes, and I hope you are, write this down.

Paul was thankful for Philemon because he was filled with faith and hope.

Look down at verse 5.

Get your eyes back in the book with me.

Verse 4 and verse 5 say, I thank my God always, when I remember you and my prayers, because I hear of your love and of the faith that you have towards the Lord Jesus and for all the saints.

This is the first thing that we notice about Philemon's heart for his church.

He was filled with faith and love.

I see three noteworthy aspects about Philemon's faith and love.

First, he showed an exemplary love.

Um, it was such an exemplary faith and love.

Paul didn't need to see it for himself because everyone else was telling him about Philemon's faith and love.

Listen, you might think your kid is the smartest kid in the classroom.

You might think your kid is the best skater on the ice.

But doesn't it mean something different if it's not coming from you, but if the coach is telling you that?

Or if the teacher's telling you that?

Philemon had an exemplary faith and love.

Notice also the priority of his faith and love.

It says in verse 5, I hear of your love and of the faith that you have towards the Lord Jesus and for all the saints.

His priority was, I love Jesus first, and then naturally I love others.

Notice also the extent of his faith and love.

By directing his love first towards Jesus, he learned to love all the saints.

All without prejudging.

How easy is it for us to love those people in the church who just quickly love us back, right?

But it's hard.

It's hard to love that small group member who has a different personality than you.

Philemon loved all.

Excuse me, it was Philemon's exemplary love for the Lord Jesus that allowed him to show love to all the saints.

Just as the rain will naturally first fall on the top of the mountain and then naturally flow to water the valley, so first our love must be shown to the Lord Jesus, and then you will naturally learn to love all.

No, God's word is pushing into your heart to see maybe the reason that you aren't serving others isn't because you don't love others that much.

It's because you lack love for God.

Lord help us.

I want Philemon's heart.

And he had a faith that a heart that was full of faith and love, but not only this.

There's a second aspect of Philemon's heart.

Paul knew Philemon's love, and he prayed that their church would grow together in fellowship.

That's the second aspect of Philemon's heart for the church.

Paul prayed that they would grow together in fellowship.

It says that in verse six, he says, I pray that the sharing of your faith may become effective for the full knowledge of every good thing that is in us for the sake of Christ.

Okay, now keep your eyes in the book.

Look with me at the beginning of verse six.

It says, and I pray that the sharing of your faith may become effective.

Now, in our English translation, that looks like a verb, sharing, but in the original language that the Apostle Paul wrote in, it wasn't a verb, it was a noun.

That noun is translated properly in the New American Standard Translation.

It says, I pray that the fellowship of your faith make it become effective.

Now, when I first uh preached the sermon, I wanted to understand what people consider when they think about fellowship?

Because I think we kind of like mess up this word and don't know what it means.

Um I asked some friends online, when you hear Christians say the word fellowship, what do you think they mean often by it?

And these are some of the top comments that I got online.

Um people think fellowship is the name of a room in a building, right?

Hey, Pastor Mike, can we book uh the fellowship room off so that we can have a small group tonight?

Here's another one people said, Fellowship is the name of an event for a social gathering.

Hey guys, fellowship's at five on Friday, we're gonna go get wings, okay?

Uh but then actually the top answer that I got online was what do people think of when they think of fellowship?

Was uh a group of hobbits and some men and some elves.

And listen, as funny as that is, straight up, I think this actually best describes what fellowship is.

Fellowship is partnership through participation.

You might say, I'm a part of that class, why don't you show up to the lectures?

You might say, no, I'm a part of this project, why don't you contribute to the work?

You might say, no, I'm on that team, why aren't you showing up for practice?

Paul prayed that they would grow together in fellowship, their partnership through participation.

But watch out.

Watch out, friends, for these four phony forms of fellowship that we all can be tempted by.

First phony form of fellowship.

Partnership through presence alone is a phony form of fellowship.

Right?

So you might go down to the Rogers Center to watch a Blue Jays game.

You might buy a cap and say, like, yeah, I'm cheering for this team.

You might catch a ball.

You ain't never been on the field.

You didn't ever take a swing.

Just because you went to the dome doesn't mean you're on the team.

Just because you show up to church itself doesn't mean it's true fellowship.

Just because you might go to small group, that itself, going, the presence alone, doesn't necessitate true fellowship.

How about this one?

Partnership through parentage alone is phony fellowship.

Grandma and grandpa might have gone out to the mission field and done a lot of work for Jesus.

Mom and Dad might have been really involved at church.

But that means the only thing you share with grandma and grandpa and mom and dad is the last name.

But none of the work they did.

When I was in high school, I used to play rugby.

I actually used to be pretty good.

We used to play schools, like I used to play this school here.

I might have been at another location, I'm not sure, but I remember playing Muloch, and uh I we used to be a really good team playing all the best uh squads from all over Ontario.

I actually used to be the captain.

For a time, my coach actually used to tell me that he was my favorite player.

But I used to play over a decade ago.

Used to play, is no longer playing.

Used to serve is no longer serving.

Used to disciple others is no longer discipling.

And be sure, friends, if you have believed in the Lord Jesus Christ, you've been drafted onto his team.

You don't get that option that Eric Lindross did when he was drafted.

You remember that?

Yeah, I know the Nordiques drafted me, but nope, just trade me.

Nope, not playing for you.

Nope, nope.

You don't get the option to sit on the bench.

If you're drafted on the team, you're wearing the jersey.

Coach wants you in the game.

Fellowship is partnership through participation.

Are you participating?

Then finally, uh partnership through posturing is phony fellowship.

Partnership through posturing is phony fellowship.

So maybe when you come to church, you are very specific to get all the details right.

You got your Bible out and it's an ESV.

You got the right Sunday clothes on.

When you come to church, you lift your hands, but the second you're out the door, that posture immediately changes.

And you don't carry those attitudes at all throughout the rest of the week.

Partnership through posturing alone is phony fellowship.

But God wants more than that for you.

God wants more than that for Harvest New Market.

God wants genuine growth, effective sharing of the faith.

Look back at your Bibles, verse 6.

It says this, and I pray that the sharing of your faith may become effective for the full knowledge of every good thing that is in us for the sake of Christ.

If we want to have effective fellowship at Harvest New Market, what do we need to do?

Well, it says right here effective fellowship is for the full knowledge of every good thing that is in us for the sake of Christ.

Effective fellowship aims for full knowledge of every good thing that is in us.

What are the good things that is in us?

Nothing that we can provide.

We're dead in our sins apart from Christ.

We have nothing good in us.

Every good thing comes from the Father.

So if we want to have the full knowledge of every good thing that is in us for the sake of Christ, partnership through participation means that you're sharing the word of God when you get together at small group.

That means that you're using your energy to serve others.

That means that you're orienting your mind and your thinking around the gospel when you come to church, when you go to small group.

Because when we're outside of church, when we get alone in our flesh, we are deceived by the deceitfulness of sin.

So we need to reorient ourselves around the knowledge of the gospel.

That's effective fellowship.

That's what God wants for you here.

Are you in the game or are you on the bench?

This was Philemon's heart.

Philemon was full of faith and love.

He was growing together in fellowship.

What else did Philemon have in his heart for the church?

Well, write this down.

Philemon was a part of a church that was refreshed through their fellowship.

Look down at verse 7 there.

It says, Paul said, I have derived much joy and comfort from your love, my brother, because the hearts of the saints have been refreshed through you.

Listen, friends, do you expect church to be a spring of living water every week?

Do you expect to come to small group knowing that you will be filled and sustained?

This is the portion that God has for you.

That you come and it's a spring of living water every time.

But if we are not filled with faith and love, if we are not only focused on phony forms of fellowship, then it's not gonna be a spring of living water.

It's gonna be a septic tank of selfishness.

And you won't want to drink from that.

Because you're just gonna poison yourself.

Because Philemon was filled with faith and love, because they had were going for effective fellowship that aimed at the full knowledge of the gospel, it was refreshing.

Lord, let that be the case here, and it will be.

If you will take up your arms, if you will take up your gifts and get in the game and participate.

If you don't have this heart for the church, then when hurt happens, you're gonna run the other way.

You're not gonna reconcile.

But if you have this heart for the church, friends, when hurt happens, you'll know reconciliation is right.

There are three simple reasons that God's word gives us that Paul gave to Philemon for which he must reconcile.

And these are simple.

If you have the heart for the church.

So let's consider them now.

What are the reasons for reconciliation?

Well, get our eyes back in the word, verse 8, it says this accordingly, though I am bold enough in Christ to command you to do what is required, yet for love's sake I prefer to appeal to you.

I, Paul, an old man now, and a prisoner also for Christ Jesus.

I appeal to you for my child Onesimus, whose father I became in my imprisonment.

Formerly he was useless to you, but now indeed he is useful to you and to me.

Three reasons for reconciliation are embedded in this passage.

Paul chose to appeal to Philemon.

He said that he could have commanded him to do uh to reconcile, but he chose to appeal for this first reason.

Reconcile because it's always right.

He could have commanded him to do it because he knew it is what is required.

Understand the context though.

Paul is talking about relationships in the church, okay?

That doesn't mean disqualify or disregard that we need to do everything we can to live peaceably with those outside of the church, but specifically in view here is are those in the church.

And it's always right to reconcile, it's always right to forgive because God in Christ has forgiven us.

Though in our stubbornness we try to fabricate an option B, there is no option B.

There is only forgiveness and reconciliation.

It is what is required.

That's the first reason.

Reconcile because it's always right.

Write this one down.

Reconcile for the sake of love.

Reconcile for the sake of love.

See, reconciliation is what is required, and Paul knew he could have commanded Philemon, you must reconcile, but Paul chose not to offer a command, but to offer an appeal.

Why?

Because love can't be mined out by compulsion, it must be offered freely through a willing heart.

And be sure, without the highest Christian virtue of love, how could we actually reconcile?

Paul wanted this highest Christian virtue to prevail.

And he knew it would not prevail if he needed to dig it out with a command.

He knew it would prevail if given from a willing heart.

But we know Philemon had a love for the Lord Jesus and for all of the saints.

If you have your priorities right, you'll be ready to receive the one who hurt you back without condition.

You'll be ready to go and ask for forgiveness without fear.

If we don't have love and refuse to reconcile, we surrender to lovelessness.

I don't want to be a part of a church that is a loveless church.

This gym could be filled three times over every weekend.

But if we don't have love, we have nothing.

The offering baskets could be filled with gold bricks every weekend.

But if we don't have love, we have nothing.

The worship band could have production better quality than your favorite pop stars world tour.

But if we don't have love, we have nothing.

Reconcile because it's always right.

Reconcile for the sake of love.

And then finally, reconcile because every Christian is useful.

Reconcile because every other individual you see here who is in Christ is useful to the cause of Christ.

Look back at verse 11.

We'll see the way that Paul thought like this.

Verse 11 says, Formerly he, Onesimus, was useless to you, but now indeed he is useful to you and to me.

Listen, friends, to refuse to reconcile to a brother or sister in Christ is to discount the one whom God has redeemed as useless, though God himself says they are useful.

It's foolish to think that another brother and sister in the body of Christ is not useful.

Moreover, to think another brother and sister in Christ is useless by refusing to reconcile with them is to ascend to a seat of judgment that God Himself does not sit on.

And far be it from us to judge others in a way that God does not.

In Christ, each of us are useful.

We cannot forget that, especially when others have hurt us.

Hurt happens, but reconciliation is right.

So what category, what situation do you find yourself in?

Maybe you're in the hurt has happened category, and by God's grace that's behind you.

Know then in this church, as you choose to endure with brothers and sisters in Christ, hurt will happen.

Maybe you're in the hurt is happening.

You've been burned, and it's still raw.

It's still tender.

Next week, we're going to walk the road to reconciliation.

And it's one that I've had to walk many times.

I only preached this sermon for the first time a couple months ago, and even since then, hurt happened in a relationship that I had.

And I'm still now in the process towards reconciliation, but by the grace of God, it seems as if both of us want to go to that end.

Next week, we're going to walk the road to reconciliation.

It's one that I've had to walk because, like you, though saved by grace, I am still corrupted by sin.

I've been freed from the curse of sin, but my deceitful flesh still thinks that Jason deserves to be number one.

And I bump people lower than me.

But I'm thankful that we together can worship at a church like Harvest Bible Chapel that is far from perfect, but a church that holds out the gospel alone as our reason for godliness.

I'm thankful that I worship at a church not perfect, but a church like Harvest Bible Chapel that holds out the gospel alone as the reason for unity in the church.

And I pray that I would stand amongst a people who would realize this: that reconciliation is right, that love must prevail, and that every Christian is useful.

All we hold out to you, whether you're hurting, whether hurt is in the past, all we hold out to you today is the gospel as the means and the foundation, as the ultimate reason by which you should seek reconciliation and be ready to seek it when he comes.

Let us then forgive others as God in Christ Jesus has forgiven us.