When the Answer Is No

If you have your Bibles, I want you to go to 2 Corinthians chapter number 12.

We're in this prayer series, and I get the opportunity to wrap it up, but I want to provide a perspective that may be a little bit uh challenging for some, uh, but I think it would be encouraging and inspiring as well.

Uh, we're starting off uh in a conversation that Paul has already in progress, and so when I start reading, you'll you'll you'll be able to you know hear that, man, he's already talking about something.

And I'll go back and provide a little bit of context to it.

Uh I'll try to read it like Paul wrote it in his tone, okay?

Uh this boasting will do no good, but I must go on.

I will reluctantly tell you about visions and revelations from the Lord.

I was caught up to the third heaven 14 years ago.

Whether I was in my body or out of my body, I don't know.

Only God knows.

Yes?

Only God knows whether I was in my body or outside of my body.

But I do know that I was caught up to paradise and heard things so astounding that they cannot be expressed in words, things no human is allowed to tell.

That experience is worth boasting about, but I'm not gonna do it.

I will boast only about my weaknesses.

If I wanted to boast, I would be no fool in doing so because I would be telling the truth, but I won't do it because I don't want anyone to give me credit beyond what they can see in my life or hear in my message, even though I have received such wonderful revelations from God.

So to keep me from becoming proud, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger from Satan to torment me and keep me from becoming proud.

Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away.

Each time he said, My grace is all you need.

My power works best in weakness.

So now I have I am glad to boast about my weaknesses so that the power of Christ can work through me.

That's why I take pleasure in my weaknesses and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ, for when I am weak, then I am strong.

That's good stuff, right?

So so uh I want to teach from the subject today when the answer is no.

When the answer is no.

Would you bow your heads?

Let's pray over the word, shall we?

Uh Holy Spirit, help us to process no.

Amen.

It's been a series on prayer.

You should have learned that short prayers rock.

Okay.

Paul the apostle, uh, one of uh the key figures in the New Testament in the establishment of the Lord's church.

It's amazing to me always who God decides to use.

He doesn't always use the people that we think should be used, he doesn't always use the people that, you know, have the best personalities or the people that's just like, oh, that guy is so sweet.

He, God, use him.

He's nice.

God goes after everybody, even terrorists.

Because that's what Paul was.

Before his encounter with Jesus, he terrorized Christians.

He persecuted them harshly.

He wanted them incarcerated for believing that Jesus Christ was Yeshua.

Not only did he want them persecuted, arrested, tried, he wanted them killed.

And God, who is not like us, decides to aim all of his love at a guy who is vehemently opposed to Jesus Christ as Lord.

Paul has this incredible experience with God.

You can find out all about that in Acts chapter number nine.

The encounter that he has with Jesus is life-changing.

He's blinded for three days, but after the religious scales drop from his eyes, Paul is a completely different person.

It's like taking a pit bull off of a leash when the mailman comes.

Paul goes into action and he starts preaching the gospel everywhere, establishing churches.

He's an incredible mentor.

The pastoral epistles that we have are written by Paul.

He writes a third of the New Testament.

He is relentless in his pursuit to see the church of Jesus Christ expand so that God's kingdom can come from heaven and dwell on earth.

He is by far the greatest apostolic evangelist that we have in the New Testament.

I don't think there was any more passion that Paul could have for any city or community of believers than he had for Corinth.

The Corinthian people were a mixed-up bunch.

They had a lot of issues that they were dealing with, but when the gospel message came to them, they embraced Paul and received his message, and he established a very strong church there.

There's three letters written to the Corinthian church.

One has all been lost, but the other two that we see, we find him lovingly uh trying to grow and mature a community of believers that were exposed to a lot of debacle and sin.

The second letter that we have to the Corinthian church, the first nine verses are awesome.

They're really encouragement.

It's like, hey, I love you.

Go be with God.

I just pray that you fall in love with him more and let's raise an offering for the church in Jerusalem.

That's the church that sent us, and let's be a blessing to them.

And one through nine is just, ha ha ha, la la la.

Everything is good.

And then it gets to chapter 10.

When you read it, if you just read the Bible, it goes to, it's just like, oh yes, Paul, oh, that's encouraging.

Oh, you are so I love it.

And then he just turns.

I'm an apostle.

Oh, okay.

We well, I think we know that you're an apostle.

We were here when you established the church.

But what had happened was there were some people that came into this community and tried to subvert Paul's apostolic authority.

They tried to undermine his credibility by saying that he wasn't a real apostle, that he wasn't laying down doctrine correctly, and that they shouldn't be listening or following Paul, they should be following these new guys that rose up.

Paul's a little bit miffed by this.

And so he goes on the defense of writing to them, letting them know listen, uh, God gave me to you.

And I don't know what these other guys are saying, and I don't know what they're all about, but but I want you to know that there is a there's a connection that I have with you.

There's blood, sweat, and tears that I've put into uh building you up as a community to follow after Jesus.

And I want to read you uh a little bit of his tone uh as he's uh describing and defending himself.

And and I'll again try to do it in his tone, but but you you read it and and see it for yourself.

Second Corinthians chapter number 11, starting at the 22nd verse.

Are they Hebrews?

So am I.

Are they Israelites?

So am I.

Are they descendants of Abraham?

So am I.

Are they servants of Christ?

I know I sound like a madman, but I have served him far more.

I have worked harder, been put in prison more often, been whipped times without number, and faced death again and again five different times.

The Jewish leaders gave me 39 lashes.

Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was stoned, not high.

That's uh, it's not that much of a translation.

Literally, rocks stone, okay?

Three times I was shipwrecked.

Don't ever get on the boat with Paul.

It's just don't go on a cruise with him.

Three times I was shipwrecked.

Once I spent a whole night and day adrift at sea.

I told you, don't do it.

Have traveled on many long journeys, I have faced danger from rivers and from robbers, have faced danger from my own people, the Jews, as well as from the Gentiles, have faced danger in the cities, in the deserts, and on the seas.

I have faced danger from men who claim to be believers but are not.

I have worked hard and long, enduring many sleepless nights.

I have been hungry and thirsty and have often gone to bed without food.

I have shivered in the cold, without enough clothing to keep me warm.

Then, besides all of this, I have the daily burden of my concern for all the churches.

This is a guy who is bearing his soul.

You'll never find anyone in the New Testament more vulnerable and transparent than Paul.

As he's trying to summate and wrap up the defense that he has of what he's been going through, he turns the corner and gets even more transparent.

He said, Listen, I if I wanted to boast, I could, but I won't.

I went up to the third heaven.

I don't know if I was in my body or out of my body, but I was up there.

And I saw stuff that was so profound, I can't even share it with another human being.

I mean, I wrote about justification, propitiation, sanctification, all the Asians, not Asians, Asians, the second coming of the Lord Jesus Christ.

I wrote about all this stuff.

That's just the stuff I can share with you.

There's a whole bunch of stuff that he gave me that I can't even share with you.

And to keep me from becoming proud, he gave me this thorn, a messenger from Satan to torment me.

And I begged God three different times, please take the storn away from me.

Now, can you imagine?

After being stoned, not high, shipwrecked three times, beaten 39 times across his back five different times.

You would think he could get a prayer through to God.

He said, I went to him.

And I said, Lord, I got this thorn, and it's bothering me.

And theologians for hundreds of years have tried to figure out what a thorn is, and they thought it was an eye ailment.

Some people thought it was another physical abnormality.

Some people think it was a person that uh was bothering him or the persecution that he was under.

What I'm glad is, we don't know.

That way it gets to be all of ours.

The thorn is the most beautiful gospel fill-in-the-blank you can have for your pain.

So, whatever your thorn is, couple it with Paul's as we look at him going to the Father and saying, begging, pleading, would you please take this thorn away from me?

And the response is my grace is sufficient.

My strength is made perfect in your weakness.

Thank you, Lord.

I received that.

Mmm, Jesus.

Hey, honey, I just came out of my quiet time.

I heard a word from the Lord.

He told me his grace was sufficient.

So go ahead and take all that grace and come get this storm.

Because it's right here.

A couple days go by, a couple weeks go by, a couple months go by.

It's still there.

He goes to pray again.

Um, Lord.

Maybe I didn't say in Jesus' name on my last prayer, and maybe I wasn't as specific as I needed to be about my thorn, because like I want it gone, not like I needed to be out of here.

So um, God please take the thorn.

In Jesus' name, amen.

My grace is sufficient.

My strength is made perfect in your weakness.

Thank you, Lord.

You said it twice.

Double confirmation.

Take all that grace twice and come get this door.

A few days go by, a few weeks go by, maybe a couple months go by.

It's still there.

Third time, this is when intercession turns into like a little bit of a growl.

Anyone ever?

Prayer sounds like you're turning into a wolf.

Lord Jesus! Really serious about this?

In the name of Jesus, I did the prayer series.

I heard everybody preach.

I got notes, got a war room, watch the movie.

Jesus.

Anybody ever prayed the prayer, Lord?

I can serve you so much better if this thing was just gone.

Anybody ever had now if it's your spouse or your kids, don't clap that much, but anybody ever prayed that?

Lord, if you could just ooh.

My grace is sufficient.

My strength is made perfect in your weakness I don't know if I want to thank you, Lord.

Uh let me hold on, let me get this straight.

So um is that is that a no?

Anybody ever heard this scripture?

My grace is sufficient.

God's gonna give you strength in your weakness.

Oh, brother, you're gonna be okay.

Do you know what they're really telling you?

No.

This is the best no that's ever been given in the entire Bible.

And we just toss it around.

God's grace is sufficient, his strength is made perfect in weakness.

All you're telling somebody is no.

Paul prayed three different times for this thing that was constantly painting him to go away, and God's answer three different times, as beautiful as the words are, is no, no, no.

What do you do with that?

What do you do with the nose?

They come from God.

You've prayed about it, you've left it before the Lord, you want them to do something, you want them to change, and it's no.

Well, there's three points that I want to give you that I hope will help you process the no's a little bit better.

If you want to write something at the top, you can write three things that happen when we get a no.

These are the three things I think should happen when we get a no.

Point number one, something dies in us.

Something dies in us.

It could be our pride, it could be our ego, all the way to our hope, maybe even our faith.

Something starts to die in us when we get a no.

I have two sons, Nathan and Noah.

Nathan is eight now, uh, Noah's five.

Uh Nathan has come to the conclusion that he doesn't do no well at all.

Uh so he has employed his younger brother uh to be the one to ask all the questions to his mommy and daddy.

That way he won't get a direct no, it'll be an indirect no.

Uh and kids that age don't know that they're not whispering.

They don't know that their parents have good ears.

So I actually can hear uh when he's setting his brother up to come ask me a question.

And he'll go to his brother and say, tell dad, ask dad if we can use the computer to play video games.

And Noah, who's impervious to the word no, Dad, can we use a computer to play video games?

No.

He said no.

And he just goes on to find something else to do.

Here's what happens with Nathan when he gets a no directly.

You would think I didn't say he couldn't play video games, you would think I said no to him as a person.

Like you as an eight-year-old with your little creature fingers, with smudgy little, oh, nothing, no, nothing about you is worthy to play a video game.

He doesn't process it that I'm that that I'm that I'm trying to budget his time on video games.

He actually takes it personally that maybe there's something wrong with me that you told me no.

Isn't it amazing sometimes when we get the same type of response from God?

How the enemy in a moment of vulnerability makes us feel like there's something wrong with me.

I don't know if you know this, but I'll figure out this equation alive from the enemy at the right moment of vulnerability can sound like the truth.

And we can walk away thinking there must be something wrong with my prayer life.

I must not be close enough to God, everyone else is getting a yes, I'm over here trying to process this no.

There must be something wrong with me.

Listen, no's are not God's rejection, nor is it his abandonment.

Something he's doing, something he wants to reveal.

There's something in us when a no comes that needs to die.

Which brings us to point number two.

Someone lives in us.

Point one, something dies in us when we get a no, but it gives an opportunity for someone to live in us, and that person is the Holy Spirit.

When that no comes to us, that correction comes to us, that that block comes to us, we have an opportunity to back up and say, God, I don't know what you want to do in this season.

I don't know what you want to do in this situation, and so I need to rely on the Holy Spirit.

I can't rely on my own wisdom, I can't rely on my own intellect because I will get it wrong.

So, Holy Spirit, can you please help me process what is going on here?

I've died to my way of thinking, and so I need you to step in and be able to give me context and clarity to what I'm going through right now.

And here's the reason why it's so important.

If you don't allow the Holy Spirit to come into that area of your life and help you process it, you can open up a door to the enemy, and he'll start processing it for you.

If you really slow down and think about it, some of the stuff the enemy says is just absolutely ridiculous.

Well, God just doesn't love you anymore.

Well, he's done with you.

You're you're too bad.

You remember that sandwich you stole when you were seven?

He I know you went to the altar for 11 times at camp, but he's still.

That's in that's in the Lamb's Book of Life.

Right next to your name, sandwich stealer.

It says it right there.

And again, a lie during the right time of vulnerability will have you walking around.

I'm a sandwich stealer.

I'll never eat a sandwich again.

I'm fasting for all sandwiches.

When I go to In N Out, I'm just gonna ask for the meat.

No buns.

No buns.

Allow the Holy Spirit to come into that moment and help you to process it.

And it may not happen exactly when you want it to happen.

The answer may not come when you want it to come, but it is coming.

Which brings us to point number three.

After something has died in us and we allow someone, the Holy Spirit, to live in us, some things change in us.

When that thing dies and the Holy Spirit has an opportunity to come in, He changes our perspective, He course corrects.

And then we start to see.

Things completely differently.

Here's how we can see it in Paul's life.

Starting again at verse number 8, chapter 12.

Three different times I beg the Lord to take it away.

Each time he said, My grace is all you need, my power works best in weakness.

So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.

What?

You're glad now?

That's why I take pleasure in my weaknesses.

What?

And in the insults, hardships, persecution, and troubles that I suffered for Christ.

For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Can you imagine Paul going back to his small group?

On a Tuesday.

Hey, brother Paul, we still got your name down right next to your name.

It says Thorn.

We've been praying for you.

Come on, Paul.

Do you have a good report yet?

I mean, you went to the doctors.

Is the Thorn still there?

He's like, yep.

Ooh.

Paul's a little weird today.

The first few times he put it on.

I mean, he was crying in anguish, and now this time he's still.

So, so so you're smiling, so I'm confused.

Is it good?

I'm gonna check this off.

Um, no, it's still there.

Yeah! Wait a minute.

We want to cross it, we want to cross it off.

Are you healed?

No, I'm not healed, but you can cross my name off.

I'm sorry, what?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

We ain't praying about that no more.

I'm sorry, what?

Yeah, I'm not praying about that no more.

We got some other stuff to pray about.

Let's pray about the churches being built.

Let's pray about God expanding his kingdom.

Let's do something else.

I'm not coming in here and have another pity party about this thorn.

He said, no, I'm over it.

It's time to go, it's time to do something else.

I'm not talking to him about it anymore.

What?

Paul, what happened to you?

I have my perspective changed.

Something died, someone lived, and gave me a different perspective on my situation.

And here's the perspective that he gave me.

There are some things that I will not find out about God with a yes that I can only find out with a no.

There is some strength that I will only get from God, not with a yes, but with a no.

There is some power that I will not be able to experience with a yes, I can only get it from a no, and this is my no.

And I'm gonna just deal with it.

Maybe this is a good time to share with you that the answer that came to him was not just a spiritual answer.

If you read the response, it's written in red.

Which means Jesus himself responded to Paul.

And here's what I believe the implication is behind my grace is all you need, my strength is made perfect in weakness.

You ready for it?

Uh Paul.

The answer is no.

And before you think I'm being mean to you, uh, just remember you're not the only guy that's ever prayed for something to be taken away and it wasn't taken away.

I received a no as well.

Aren't you glad?

I know what it is to have our father listen to our prayer and not answer it.

But your perspective will change.

Just like mine did.

My cousin Cookie, uh, I called her my aunt growing up because she was many years older than me.

Uh, but she was my cousin, and she was an infectious uh personality, and she had this voice that was akin to um a cartoon character.

And she didn't really say words as much as she sung them.

And anytime you come in her presence, she'd be like, Hi, Timmy, it's so good to see you.

Oh my God.

I miss you so much, Timmy.

That was her personality.

And several years ago, she was diagnosed with cancer.

Breast cancer.

And we began to pray.

We began to ask the Lord to heal cookie.

We began to pray, Lord, you could just dry up the cancer because you're a sovereign God.

You could just dry it up.

We believe in that power of healing.

We've seen it happen for others.

It could happen for our cousin.

Well, it didn't happen in that way.

She had to go through with surgery, she had to have a double mastectomy, both of her breasts were removed.

But the cancer was gone, and we had a celebration.

I mean, we partied.

We praised God, we rejoiced.

Then the cancer came back several months later.

When it came back this time, it was much more aggressive and had spread through her entire body.

They went back to the doctor, the doctor said they wanted to do another operation, and Cookie with that sweet voice said, Are you gonna get it all this time?

They said, No.

But we can do this surgery and it will make you more comfortable and it could probably prolong your wife, your life for an extended time.

She goes, Well then I'm just not gonna do it.

The family was kind of shocked that there was a selfish side of us that was like, No, have the surgery.

What are you talking about?

You gotta do this.

We're still believing God and we're praying, but you have to have the surgery.

And here's how I know that she had processed her no.

She looked at us in that sweet voice, which is hard to be stern when your voice is that high.

But she said, Look, y'all, I don't see what the big deal is.

I'm in a win-win situation.

Either God's gonna heal me and we'll give him glory, or I'm gonna die and be in glory.

It's exactly what she said.

And when somebody who is suffering in pain is that clear between their relationship with God and the seemingly response that they're coming to grips with, that's when you go, I'm just not as spiritual as you, so I'm gonna let you.

Amen, sister.

You are on fire for Jesus.

Because I'm I need to go pray, because I'm not even where you are right now.

She died.

And her mom, my aunt, asked if I would eulogize her.

When we have a party for believers, I mean, when we have a funeral for believers, we have a party.

I mean, it is a huge celebration because we know we will see you again.

You got home before we did, but we will get to see you again.

There was another person that had to process a no.

And that was her husband, Sherwin.

As we were sitting there at that funeral, we were singing this very upbeat praise song to the Lord, celebrating her life.

And my cousin Sherwin stood up, sitting on the front row, and he walked over to the casket and peered down at the lifeless body of his wife.

He put his hands on the edge of the casket.

And then he just threw his hands up.

And with these hot tears streaming down his face, just began to worship the Lord.

And in that moment, I knew that he had processed his no.

I don't know what your thorn is.

I don't know what you've brought before the Lord time and time again.

And the answer seems to be no.

What I do know is he hasn't rejected you.

He hasn't abandoned you.

Whatever has died in your heart.

Allow the Holy Spirit to be the one to change your perspective so that you can have the same response that Paul, Cookie, and Sherwin had.

But the encouragement is, you know, I'm the only one that's going through this.

And the Holy Spirit is here to help.

To provide clarity and give you a perspective that you never could have imagined in such a difficult time.

So in a moment, we're going to pray, and after we pray, we're going to stand and sing one last song.

We'll have altar ministry at the front.

Our team is here.

If you need prayer for any reason, we just ask you to come.

If you're processing a no, as we've done in several of the services before, just come down.

Get the prayer that you need.

Maybe you're here, you don't have a relationship with Jesus Christ.

And the no that you're getting is to the way you want to live your life.

Change your heart.

Allow God to change your perspective.

Holy Spirit, I pray that you would draw every person that needs prayer.

In Jesus' name.

Amen.