Venture Unfiltered #8: Life as a Pastor's kid

Hey, Venture Pastor Brandon here, Welcome to episode number eight. We still

haven't been canceled. I think it's because my co host Tony Mattar is on

vacation. Tony was here, surely we would have been canceled by now.

I just want to take a moment. I have a Venture unfiltered exclusive for

all of you that are listening. I want to share with you what our

upcoming revival weekends are and revival services. So people always ask who's our next

big guest speaker, what weekend is it? How can I plan for?

And I am really excited to share the next three revival weekends we will have

at Venture. Mark these on your calendar. If you're not a part regularly

a Venture Church, you will not want to miss these, especially our Sunday

night revival services. But I am pumped to say that my pastor Glen Bertow

will be back Boom Boom will be back in the house at Venture on October

eighth, doing all three of our Sunday morning services and a special Sunday Night

Revival worship prayer gathering. Then a month later, November fifth, my great

friend Jared Ming will be ministering in our morning services end helping us with a

revival gathering a Sunday night November fifth. Then fast forward to February fourth.

If you're a teenager college student in the church, you've heard Manny Arrango before,

super funny, super deep. In fact, Manny just got his doctorate,

and Manny Arrango will be sharing in our morning services and doing a special

revival service on February fourth. It's great. It's the week before the Super

Bowl. It's going to be venture Super Bowl Sunday morning that week, so

it'll be great. I have a special guest, special episode for you today.

We're doing something that we've never done before. We have two guests,

and I have two of my kids, Elijah and Rachel here with me,

and my third child is actually producing this, so he is on the buttons

Raiders roll. So if you hear any of the background noise that is Judah

there he is, that will be his contribution. One of the things that

we get asked often is what it's like to grow up with kids as a

pastor, and people wonder, I wonder what it's like to be a pastor's

kid. I, of course don't know what it's like to be a pastor's

kid. I was not raised in church. My dad's a businessman, and

I'm the first pastor in the history of our family. My wife is the

first pastor in the history of her family, so we know what it's like

to grow up in that setting. But we brought my kids in and they're

going to talk about life as a p K. So let me start off

by introducing my oldest Rachel. Hi, Rache, Hello, why don't you

tell everyone just a little bit about yourself, who you are and what you

do for work. Okay, So I'm actually now Rachel Winfield because I got

married last August to my husband Ben, and we bought a home and we

are expecting a dog, a puppy. And yeah, I am a teacher.

I'm going into my fifth year of teaching. I have taught first grade

and now I'm moving into second grade. And so I'm enjoying my summer break

right now and gearing up for the next school year. So, and something

else about me, as I love to read and I love to do anything

outdoors, including hiking, snowboarding, etc. That's me. So how long

have you been a part of Venture? How many years? However many years?

It's existed, which I have now lost your back. All right,

now, I will introduce you to my youngest Elijah. Elijah, tell him

about yourself, tell him what you do now. Hi, everyone, glad

to be here. I am the baby of the family. Like you said,

my name is Elijah. I just graduated from the University of Washington like

a month ago. Go Dogs, Go Dogs, Raiders, Roll and Raiders.

Yeah, and I hopped right into the full time work life. Literally

two days after I graduated, I started full time over at b ECU.

I'm a marketing coordinator over there for now. So yeah, it's going pretty

good. Elijah has one of the coolest jobs ever because he basically gets to

be the interface between b ECU and their sponsorship with sports teams. Yeah.

I don't know high landed that, but I did, and it's pretty sweet.

I'm loving it. He My dad's benefiting off of all those free tickets

just as much as me, so he's loving it too. Yeah. My

first job was Taco Bell. My first job out of college was a great

church and Everett that encouraged me to live in poverty. The way we're going

to do this is I have a list of questions that I want to ask

my kids as they talk about their experience growing up as a pastor's kid.

They have not heard these questions yet, they have no clue. In fact,

they have interrogated me beforehand, what are you going to ask us?

And I just said, just don't interrupt each other. That's my only request.

So you're going to get their honest, non prepared responses to all these

questions. We do want to let everyone know that we are actually recording from

my house today only because there's some work being done in our auditorium. They're

working on the low end base so it's not insanely loud for you on Sunday

mornings, and because of that, we couldn't record at the church, so

we're here. So if it seems a little bit different, that's what it

is. So I'll start with Rachel here. Rachel, I'm really interested think

back, and I'm gonna ask you the same question. Elia, So you

have a minute to think the answer. What is your earliest memory of going

to church? M Well, I feel like sometimes that question's hard to answer

because I've been told a lot of things about me in church, especially when

we lived in California. We lived in Modesto, and my parents were the

youth pastors there, and so I feel like I've heard a lot about what

I would do there and like I'd run up on the stage and all the

youth kids loved me and all these things, But to be honest, I

do not remember any of that. So my first actual memory is probably when

we lived back in Washington when we were planting well it was Canyon Creek Church

at the time. I vividly remember when we would meet in the office space

when we are first like launching the church, and we didn't have any chairs,

I'm pretty sure, and I remember like just a small group of kids.

I actually don't know if it was anyone besides me and the boys,

but I remember us being in a room. I'm assuming that was like the

kids class, but there wasn't an official kids class, and that we would

always meet in there, and I just remember the like overall memory I have

is that we were constantly doing things for the church at that, like around

that time in my life when I was like seven, I think, and

so we were constantly either like putting door hangers on doors or like meeting in

that office space, and that was kind of our whole life then, So

those are a majority of my memories. I vividly remember that office space like

I could describe the exact layout of it. Did you know that was actually

my office that we would convert for those gatherings. We'd move everything out and

let kids in there. I remember that office space very well. You you

totally unlocked the door hanger memory. I have so many memories of hanging door

hangers. Anyways, So is that your earliest memory of church? No me

or Rachel? Oh? No mine? And again, he didn't give us

the questions ahead of time, so these are unfiltered responses. You're gonna get

him. Um, I'm sure what probably you want, Dad is a super

like spiritual I remember when the Lord touched me at Canyon Creek Church back then.

My very first memory, I have a distinct memory of it was when

and I don't know what year this was, but we were probably super young,

and we was when we were at Jackson High School. Was Christian on

staff during that time? Wow? If you only remember when Christian started,

you have like the first eight years of your life you don't remember. I

mean I was very young. No, this is just my first Like I

can vividly remember this exact instance, and it was when we were at Jackson

High School and you know, as PK's were there for all five hundred services,

so we get bored, and as auntie young boys with our cousins who

were like our best friends at the time, we get super bored by the

third service, and when we're at a high school, we just decide to

screw it, let's just walk around, why not for many hours? And

I remember one time it was me, Judah, the cousins. I remember

we just started walking around Jackson High School, totally lost track of time.

Also didn't know have any idea where we were on that campus. And then

I remember hearing I think it was mom yelling from us, like across the

entire school, like asking where we were. It turns out we were gone

for like two hours. That's my first memory at the church was getting lost.

We'll start, We'll go back to Rachel again. Rachel, when was

the first time you realized that as a PK your childhood was more unique than

other people's. Oh, I feel like, I don't know if there's like

a specific moment, but I just remember growing up, a lot of my

friends would travel over the weekends, or they would go snowboarding or skiing,

like from a very young age, especially in this area, because that's like

a huge sport to do in the winter. I think people would just do

they'd go boating on Sundays and stuff like that, And I just remember it

felt like our weekends were just fully revolving around church, Like Sundays pretty much

was church from the very moment we woke up until the middle of the day,

sometimes even late at night on Sunday days, depending on what we were

doing. And so I think that's like the biggest difference that I even felt

going into like middle school and high school was I watched a lot of my

friends do all sorts of things over the weekends that we couldn't really do,

and that was because we were at church or doing something for the church.

And we also had no money. Well that was part of it, we

were all so poor, but I think that kind of had to do with

starting a church, as we didn't really have a lot of money, and

that I guess probably kind of aligns with the fact that I watched people go

on trips and do all these expensive hobbies because they maybe were in like the

business field, or whatever, and so they could have the means to do

that and we did not. But I didn't really feel the money thing as

much as a kid, because I think you just enjoy the little things as

a child. But I definitely could tell that we mostly were always at church.

What about you, Elijah, when did you realize being a PK was

different than other people's upbringing. Well, there's a few instances similar to Rachel's,

but just as a bonus, real quick, now, I'm realizing it

was weird because people are so surprised that they're all going to weddings now,

and I was like, oh, I grew up going to like four hundred

weddings every year because my dad would officiate them. That's the word, officiate

them. Yeah. Anyways, you guys were also ring bears often, and

Rachel has so many flower girl dresses and pictures we don't even know what to

do with them. Yeah, i'd say the first couple of times though,

that I remember that my life was slightly different as a PK was Number one,

I never knew anything about the Seahawks until I got like my own phone

and like could keep track because we were always at church, so we'd never

watch seaw games. The second thing is I had a lot of sports games

on Sundays, like for soccer and basketball and baseball and things like that,

and everyone would always have like their entire family at all their games and stuff,

and Mom and you did like a great job. It's it's not shade

to you guys or anything. You guys made it to everything you could.

But I remember Nana and Grandma used to take me to most of my games,

so God bless them. But I remember that being like one of the

first instances where I'm like, yeah, my parents work on Sundays. It's

weird. It's not like the rest of you guys. But I see that's

the first one. Oh, can I say one more thing? Sure?

I also felt like there were always people at our house, and I don't

know if that's the norm, like we would always have teenagers or just people

always at our house and like girls living with us for period of time.

And I also don't think that that's quote unquote normal for people that maybe aren't

super involved in church. So yeah, it is pretty fun to have constantly

people around all the time. Yeah, but it's interesting when all of those

people know everything about you and you most times don't even know their first name,

so very true. That's always a fun one. So I'm going to

ask you two different questions, so I want you to think of the answers

to these different I'm going to talk about. The two questions are, what

do you remember as this was the most challenging thing I've read to deal with

as a pastor's kid. And then I'm going to ask you just in general,

what was the hardest part of it, So like a specific thing that

was really hard because you grew up a PK. And then what was in

general challenging? Wants to go first, I can go, okay, um,

specific instance, definitely, what was it five or six years ago?

Now? The building project as a PK. I had seen many similar building

projects with the church up until that point, but it all kind of culminated

and we've all heard the story a million times, but all kind of culminated

to the church that we are now in that that building and getting that building

built. And I remember, I think it was Rachel and I Judah didn't

go on this family trip. We were on some family vacation. I think

it was to Vegas, and I remember you and Mom sat Rachel and I

down at a dinner or a lunch or something, and you were like super

upfront honest with us, and you were like, hey, like, if

here's where we're at with this building, and we don't know if this is

going to happen anymore, and if this doesn't happen, we don't know if

that means God's calling us somewhere else or if God's you know, telling us

to go in a different direction with this. And I remember you saying,

We're gonna try one more thing, and you tried to like you tried to

be like pretty pretty honest with us, like, hey, we don't know

if this is gonna work, like honestly, at this point, you know,

the enemy has tried to stop this building from happening so many times that

you know, we wouldn't be surprised if that happens again, or again if

the Lord's just telling us to do something else. And I remember sitting there,

remember looking at Rachel. I think there were some tears involved too,

because you know, the implications of not getting that building built were a lot

of changes within our lives. And I think just that was the start of

a really really hard process, or I guess kind of in the middle of

a really hard process, especially for you, you and Mom. I think

what's important for every one that's listening to understand is, you know pastor's kids

fall on I guess two sides of the spectrum. There is the the ones

that were involved in the ministry from the get go and feel very attached to

it, connected with it, and then the pendulum swings totally to the other

side where they're bitter, want nothing to do with church. And just so

everybody knows, like when you hear their answers, they are not bitter with

church, Venture, mom and dad for being ministers at all. They I

would say, for the most part, you guys loved it. Oh yeah,

for sure. Yeah, Venture's home for sure. So when they talk

about how complicated it was, when you think of a job transition or a

pastor transitioning from a church of your another pastor listening, you know that oftentimes,

yeah, your wife is deeply connected and so that's complicated. But for

us, it was this is all our kids knew also too, so our

kids were deeply in love with everything that was happening at Venture. Do you

remember a challenging moment, Rache, I mean, I think, just bouncing

off of what you just said, I think it's partially we were always invested,

but also part of Elijah and I as personalities that we just get super

like attached to things. And so for me, like kind of like what

you were saying, I've always been extremely attached to this church, and that

means that the hard moments, because there definitely were like challenging moments and seasons.

I felt those a lot, even as a kid, because I cared

so much. And I think we also would watch how some of those hard

times would affect you and mom, and that was tough too. But I

would say just to have a different answer than Elijah, because that's probably what

I would have answered too. But I would say a hard time for me

was when I first went to college because I joined a sorority and at the

University of Washington, go Dogs, and I loved it, and I wouldn't

take back anything. I loved my experience there, and I've made really great

friends. But I would say the hard part about it was I had only

really ever known a life in which I was super involved with church and even

my friends in high school, I pretty much gravitated towards the Christians and like

the people that even went to Venture with me, and those were my friends

just all growing up. So it was the first time that I was in

an environment that church wasn't quote unquote popular, and that was really tough because

I don't think I was super prepared for it, and there's just a lot

of temptation and peer pressure, and that was probably a really challenging moment because

I was questioning, like was my faith always just because of my family or

was it actually my own? And so I kind of had to make that

decision just like everybody else does, whether you're a pastor's kid or not.

I had to make that decision on my own, but it was just a

hard time and it kind of took a little bit for me to get there.

So I think one of the benefits that your mom and I had is

we were youth pastors for twelve years and we loved youth ministry. In fact,

there's many people in our church they were former youth kids, and honestly,

the most fun job in the church is the youth pastor job. It's

really a blast. But it prepared us for having teenagers. Yeah, it

prepared us for the spiritual journey that people were going to go on that they've

got faith eventually has to become their own. And it's kind of where I

created this teaching that I do where I talk about there comes a moment when

you have this aha moment with Jesus where your faith is more than just I

got saved through osmosis because my parents were Christians to where my faith became my

own. One of the things that I remember for you that is unique that

the average person doesn't have to deal with is I have a fairly large social

media presence. People know who I am, and when you joined your sorority,

all your sorority sisters started following me on Instagram and things, which I

thought was cool. So I started following them back because I thought what was

a way for me to keep tabs on Rachel and they followed me first.

Come to find out from Rachel that that was against the rules. So the

first phone call that I ever got where my daughter yelled at me was stop

following my friends on Instagram. I will never forget that. Yeah. Oops,

sorry, shout out Rachel for doing Greek life before me. She fell

on the sword a little bit first. Yeah, Well, can I answer

just because it relates to what I was just talking about. The overall hard

thing. I would say I definitely noticed it when I was in college,

but looking back, I could just and ever since, I have seen this

as being a pastor's kid a challenge is you're kind of unintentionally but you're just

kind of always under our microscope. Because this sounds silly to say, but

you're kind of in a spot like whether you want to or not as a

pastor's kid, especially as the church has grown, and you know, a

lot of people feel like they know you really well because they hear Brandon and

Die talking about you know their kids a lot, and so they feel like

they know you. And I think this is just a thing with people,

is you're really quick to point out the flaws that you see in other people

before yourself. This is just all people. I mean, I'm guilty of

it too, but I think that was a tough part about being a pastor's

kid is people feel like they know you, and so they feel like they

can critique and they're watching your every move sometimes. And so I think there

were some times in college that you know, I was going through my process

of finding God on my own, and making that choice for myself, and

so I think people were were worried about me, and they were well intentioned,

but they sometimes were it came off as judgmentals. So I think that

a hard part about being a pastor's kid is you're just you're kind of in

a spotlight and under a microscope a lot, and so you have to be

very like thoughtful in especially what you post on social media and things like that.

And one of the things too is you, guys, we're here from

the moment we start at the church. You're here through every like big leap

that the church made to the point where now your parents pastor one of the

largest churches in the state. They're very recognizable and you have to kind of

grow up more and more with people really quickly to realize who my parents are.

That would be different. Yeah. Yeah. Plus to kind of add

onto what you were saying, Like, obviously, as believers, like we

represent Jesus, which is a good, I would say, like a healthy

pressure to have on you. But as pastor's kids, we not only have

the pressure to represent Jesus, but also the pressure to present our church and

like dependent on our age, Like we represent the kids ministry or like I

remember growing up, Rachel to me was like the face of the youth ministry,

Like that's just who she was. So I think I honestly agree with

with with her gripe about that. I guess is just that's definitely was the

hardest thing was was having that extra added pressure that you're the face of really

your family's I mean, I hate calling it the church this because it's really

not that, but like you're the face of your family's business, like you're

the face and in certain aspects, and I think that was just so do

you guys feel like I'll go back to Elijah first, do you guys feel

like mom and Dad put extra pressure on you to behave a certain way because

of the way it might be perceived by other people. Um, I'd say

the answer that question changed as we aged. I think earlier I think you

guys very much encouraged us to behave and also we had no other choice,

but you encourage us to go to church, which we didn't have a choice.

We were dragged along. But I think you guys did a really really

really good job of as we aged, and again you said you pastored youth

kids, you're for a large portion of your life, so you kind of

knew knew to do this, but you definitely like took your hands off us

a little bit as we got order, especially in like our eighteen to twenty

one year old range, Like you really kind of were pretty hands off,

let us experience our own life for ourselves and grow in our relationship with Jesus

on our own. So i'd say changed throughout life. I don't know,

what do you think? Yeah, I think I completely agree, especially in

that like college time. I think for me it was really helpful that you

guys were more hands off and just let us, you know, figure out

who we were and like our identity and our identity in Christ. And I

think if you hadn't been that way, and you had been more like forceful

and judgmental and all of those things that are negatives, then I think,

I don't know if that would have been great for me because I needed to,

you know, figure things out on my own. So I've felt more

pressure from other people versus you and Mom, but I'll take it kind of

changing the changing the mood. And I'm really curious on this one, and

I bet they're going to answer differently, Okay, how do you like it?

Your mom doesn't do this hardly at all, But how do you like

it when your dad uses you as the comedic portion of his sermon. I

knew you were gonna ask them. You can go first, because that Rachel

likes it. But pretty sure Elijah doesn't. Wait, you want me to

go first? Oh? I love it. I'll be real. I've always

I feel like, all growing up, I would ask my parents to put

me in serbans because I'll be I'll be real. I like being the center

of attention. So it was fun. So yeah, that's probably not the

norm though for most pks. Well, here's the thing I don't hate it.

For instance, when mom talks about me, I normally like it.

And here's the reason why you you love Rachel. I mean, we all

love Rachel, but Rachel's you know, the oldest, She's the only the

only like daughter, you know that stuff. So a lot of the stories

she gets are like, oh, silly Rachel, like or like Rachel did

this amazing thing the other day. Whatever. For me, it's always like

Elijah is so stupid, why the heck did he do this? Or don't

be like Elijah in this scenario, complain like Elijah did, don't you know

whatever, And obviously for you, you know you, you sometimes like add

some drama to the situation that maybe gotta make the story good. Oh yeah,

but maybe it wasn't exactly there. And normally when it's in my context

about me, it's normally just means that it makes me look worse sometimes,

so I don't know it's it's a love hate. Normally, I've gotten to

the point where I just laugh it off or well, yeah, if you

didn't know this. A lot of the times that our dad tells stories and

uses us well actually just any story, he often dramatizes it, so it's

not always exactly as it sounds. There's a specific story I will never forget

that you shared. It was he dramatizes it so much that he said I

tried to like stab Juda's hand with a fork one time. That never happened.

I still will never forget that sermon because I was like, that never

happened. Now everyone's coming up to be like Elijah, You're like, you're

so violent, what are you doing? I was like, that's just not

true. But whatever, I'll take it and never come back. It's fine.

You know who likes when I use them in sermons the least Heather Taylor,

but she loves it. I think the stories are probably a little bit

more accurate than you guys remember, but I do admit that we add drama

to them to make them more interesting. No, my mom, Grandma Grandma

hates it when I use her in stories at sure. So if you ever

hear me refer to my mom in a sermon on Sunday, know that I'm

probably getting a phone call by one thirty that afternoon. And most of the

yes, thank you. Most of the time, it's because my mom doesn't

remember anything from my childhood and I do. Okay, let's let's keep going

here. What is your favorite memory growing up as a pastor's kid. Your

favorite memory, Well, I'm just because I'm answering this without getting a chance

to really think about it, the one that pops straight into my brain is

the grand opening of the new building that I remember being and it was ripe

before COVID happened, which was a huge bummer, but I was really grateful

that we at least got to have a few services in there before everything shut

down. But I just remember the feeling I felt of just like, this

is what my family has been pouring our lives into for my entire life,

and this is like the moment. And even Elijah is mentioning earlier that conversation.

And I also vividly remember that conversation that you and Mom had with us

in Vegas on our vacation about how, like, you know, we don't

know what's going to happen with the building, and so seeing the church rally

together like that and that that was what we had worked for in it it

all happened was just like the most powerful thing I've ever been a part of,

and I will never forget that ever. It is for you guys.

The great thing is because you guys were just as vested in this journey as

your Mom and I. You also got to celebrate just as much, and

it was just as exciting for you guys. What about you, Elijah,

what was your favorite memory of being a PK side is the one that Rachel

just used. Oh no, I won't use that, but I'll use something

kind of similar. I will never forget the moment when I'll just give the

context. I got up early for school. This was junior year of high

school, so I was getting ready, and you know, you have to

get up super super early for high school for whatever reasons. I was up

like six am, and of course Diebals is up getting ready too, because

she doesn't sleep, I think, and she, you know, is doing

her thing. I grabbed my backpack. I'm getting ready to go drive to

school, and I heard like you and mom talking in your room and like

getting really excited about something. So I remember like walking in your guy's bedroom

and remember Mom was in the bathroom like ding or makeup or something, and

I was like, what's going on? And I remember walking into the bathroom.

Her mom said come here, and I walked in the bathroom and Mom

turned to me, looked me, and I just said, the loan got

approved for the church building, and that was obviously like the biggest obstacle for

us was getting that loan approved. And I remember right when like she said

that with like tears in her eyes, like super happy and ray when I

get goose bumps talking about it, because it might be like my all time

favorite moment of life, like seriously, and I remember right when she said

that, I started sobbing, told Judah to come in, told Judah Judah's

supermost about it too. We're all getting amped and I had to go to

school, so I was the last thing I heard before I left for school,

and I remember sobbing the entire way to school that morning, was that,

Can I say one more thing? Sure, it kind of relates to

this, because clearly the building was just a huge moment. It was momentous

in our family, but I would say the runner up for my favorite moment

was also that member meeting or owner meeting that we had when everyone was just

starting to make pledges for this to make it happen basically, and you'd be

way better at explaining, but I'm sure you've talked about it a lot,

so people probably know what I'm talking about. But I just remember sitting in

that meeting. I wasn't even an owner officially at that time, so I

don't even know why I was there. It just mattered a lot to me.

But I was sitting there and just watching person after person like stand up

and motivate everyone to like pledge money and we're going to make this happen.

And it wasn't even like our family that was doing the motivating. It was

all the people of the church that were invested and that are like family to

us, and that I'm pretty sure I cried during most of that meeting,

because you know, it was just a really powerful time too well going in

context of everything that you guys have been talking about. That meeting was two

weeks after we were in Las Vegas at that dinner telling you guys, I

don't know how this is gonna go. And for those of you that are

listening might be new to venture, it looked like our building project. We

have this huge building in Mill Creek, which has been really a key catalyst

in moving the mission of Jesus forward in that community. It's been honestly what's

enabled us to grow at the capacity and speed that we have. But the

building was dead. It was done, and I basically was having a member

meeting to tell the church that the building was dead. I've shared this whenever

I do meetings with new people in the church. And I sat down and

was hoping everybody else had accepted what I had accepted, and they didn't,

and one at a time they started making spontaneous pledges and in about thirty minutes

we raised two million dollars. To this day, it's still the most shocking

God moment I've ever experienced. It was also that moment where everything that God

is doing at venture. Now you knew five six years ago that this was

what was going to happen, because a group of people don't fight for something

this much unless the Holy Spirit has united their hearts together. Because it was

a moment where the opposite could have happened, but instead fast forward where we

are now. It's pretty awesome. A few more questions for them before we

wind this thing down. What would you say overall is the best part about

being a pastor's kid? Like, what would you not trade with anyone else?

You obviously wish you could go skiing on Sundays when you were a little

kid, But what would you not trade? What do you think? My

life is so amazing? I never would have given this up? Or is

there anything? No? I just there's of course, it's just a big

question because I love it. It's the best thing ever. And I,

despite you know, the challenging things that we mentioned, none of those outweigh

how wonderful it's been to be a pastord kid to me. And so I'm

trying to think of something broad, but I guess I just love that I've

gotten to I think we have a unique situation as pastor's kids because we were

like church plant kids. I don't know if every pastor's kid walks through the

planting of a church and like is a part of it for most of their

life. So because of that, it's been a really amazing experience just getting

to invest in something as a young child and then watch it grow and be

a part of it growing and be a part of that all throughout up into

I'm going to be going on twenty seven now, and I think we planted

this church when I was seven. So are we near the twentieth anniversary?

You would have been eight, Okay, so we're in nineteen nineteen year Okay,

look at that. I just use math, but yeah, I guess

a majority of my life has been spent in venture and it's just been so

amazing to get to be a part of it growing to where it is today.

And now it's a place that I'm imagining in like raising my children in

and having them be a part of the kids ministry and then the youth ministry

and so on, and it's just a full circle moment and it's so special,

and I think it's also really special that a lot of our family is

a part of the church to like extended family, and so it's been also

a great way to just be close with family through it all. And it's

just such a huge part of not just our immediate family's lives, but our

extended family and our grandparents. And did you know that your cousin, my

niece, Riley, is a children's admin. Now what I did not know

that? Wow? Go Riley shout out. All right, Elijah, what

about you? What's your What do you think is the best part? I

mean, I trade, I won't copy Rachel, but just I don't like

it is really cool that like the church really did grow alongside us, so

that that's just like something that again I think is more unique to our situation.

I will say I wouldn't like the best part of being a PEK.

I wouldn't even say it is necessarily being a PK, but it's being a

kid, a pastor's kid. To Brandon and diabeals, like I think you

guys, just I mean not to you know, bump your ego too high,

but like you guys really are the I think a very good model as

to how a pastor should raise their kid and how encouraging you should be towards

the gospel without being forceful. But to be more broad, I'd say just

the coolest part about being a pastor's kid is like the instant opportunity you have

to tell people about Jesus when you just get to tell them what your parents

do. I think that's something I would in trade the amount of conversations I've

had, especially in college, whether it be because I, you know,

go back to church on Sundays, but mostly just like, oh, what

do your parents do? Or they'll find your Instagram dad and they'll follow it

also, but then they'll be like, wait, what is your dad like?

What does your dad do? Like? Is he what does fight pastor

mean? Why is your dad in Las Vegas right now? Yeah, well

that's always a question. Yeah. I just think the opportunity to like evangelize

is based off of just the premise of, Hey, my parents are pastors

and being able to just talk about that I think is so awesome. So

I wouldn't that's a more broad that I think most pastors kids can relate to.

Can I say one more thing? This is always what I have to

do because Elijah says something that it makes me think of something. I think

there's a stigma with pastors kids for sure. Of you know, there's two

ends of the spectrum. There's either the kids that are super sheltered, they

like don't know anything different. This is obviously extreme, but I think these

are stigmas and stereotypes, so they're super sheltered, or there's the other end

of the spectrum that is like the rebel kids, like they just go off

the rails. I mean there's a little TV show. I don't know if

it's still running, but there's a TV show about that. And so those

are the two like stereotypes, and I think what's really special and just bouncing

off of what Elia said that is the best part. Two for me about

being a pastor kid is definitely you and Mom and how you guys are normal,

Like there's never been a pressure put on us. It's always been just

an encouragement and like, you guys live your how what people see at church

is how they are at home. But they're just not like shoving it down

your throat. That's just how they live their life like they live their life

deeply in love with Jesus. And it's so cool to watch but it's not

in an extreme way. It's not about religion. It's just you can see

that they have this deep love for the Lord and it always influences everything.

And they also have a deep love for like the people in the church,

and they're always talking about like the people in the church and how much they

care about them and all of these things. And so it's also just been

really cool to watch that and get to try to become that in my own

life. Like they're just role models. So okay, well, well I'll

do enough enough compliments, Yeah, enough ego boosting. That was very sweet

and it was also not staged. I didn't tell them to see that.

In fact, I had to warn them to not make fun of me too

badly. Um, I'm just curious. I added an extra question because you

answered several I haven't asked yet. Um, what was it? You guys

were both in the Greek system at you dub, which is unique to begin

with, and of course your dad loves the University of Washington, has been

obsessed with it your whole childhood and adult lives, and will continue to be

because that's where all my grandkids are going to go. Yes, con jobed

Jude, I am curious how did people in your sorority or fraternity respond when

they found out you were a pastor's kid in a fraternity or sorority? Go

ahead of you go first? Oh yeah, I had an immediate answer,

but you go, let's see. Um, I mean you kind of already

alluded to this. One of the first things they'd asked was, wait,

isn't your dad always in Vegas? So then I'd have to have the whole

conversation. Well, well, you know, you could still actually, you

know, love Jesus and go to Vegas like they're not mutually exclusive. But

yeah, I mean, I think the first thing is a lot of people

would follow up and ask, like, what is it like to be a

pastor's kid. I think that happened a lot. Yeah, I mean I

don't honestly, people are very accepting in my fraternity. I think, Um,

I think it may be helped them understand a little bit more about myself

and probably why I exclude myself from a lot of the typical activities within the

Greek system. So yeah, I don't know, there's just a cool opportunity,

I think to just tell them all about Jesus. I think for me,

it broke a lot of stereotypes kind of what I was talking about for

the people in my sorority, because I had a lot of friends that were

hurt from church or hurt from certain religions, and it was just a cool

opportunity for them to see, not only am I a Christian, but I'm

a pastor's kid, Like that's a whole other level. And of course there's

the stereotypes, but then they would see me be normal and that, yeah,

that Christianity doesn't just have to be rules, because I think some of

the people that I knew in my strority had a problem with religion because there

were so many rules attached with certain religions that they were a part of and

growing up. And so I think it was a great opportunity to break those

stereotypes and help them see that that's not what it has to be. And

then also as a pastor's kid kind of what all I just said, they

would always just be wowed by the fact that you, specifically Dad, were

like a very normal person and that you would go to Vegas and you had

tattoos and you you know, I can't think of any other examples. Oh

you were a fight pastor, and so that I'd have to explain that story,

and you liked UFC fighting and all of these things that don't sound like

a pastor and or aren't what they would think of. And so I think

it just helps them see that, you know, Christianity can be cool still

doesn't have to be rules. That's definitely the biggest part is like knowing that

we can still be in the world. We don't have to separate ourselves because

we're Christians, or especially because we're pastor's kids. So I think people being

able to see that, I mean, it's a false thing, but like

people definitely think, oh, you're a Christian. Oh you're a pastor's kid.

That means like you're even more Christian. Like that's just the narrative that

people have with that sometimes And so yeah, getting that like extra pressure,

but then having them realize, wait, our family is super like normal and

you come to my some of my fraternity parents events and hang out with us

and stuff, and it's like it's cool. And I think some of my

friends from the sorority have gone to certain venture services and like one of my

best friends, she's now super involved in venture and I met her through the

sorority, and so I think it was It's been really fun and it was

really fun during that time because I've been out of college for several years now,

but it was really fun during that time to have them come and be

like, whoa, this is what a church services like. Like this is

not like the church services I went to growing up that were three hours long

and we sang him not saying hims are bad, but where they were just

bored and would be falling asleep during service and all these things. They were

like, this is like cool and that was really cool to be a part

of two. So a couple more questions real quick here, then we'll be

done. What would be your advice to pastors with young kids on our staff?

Right now? Cole and Sydney have their daughter, and Tony and Ariel

have two kids, and Morgan and Nicole have two kids. What would be

your advice to them as their kids get older and grow up in ministry?

What would be your advice to parents? I think, especially once the kids

get older, there will be I mean, you could probably test this more,

but like there will probably be a point where you're gonna want to latch

down on your kids even more and want to encourage them or almost force them

to go to church even more because they're gonna become more independent and things like

that. Don't force them would be my advice. I'd say, let them

figure out life for themselves, obviously, be encouraging, don't like exclude the

church and faith out of conversation for that time. Like, still be exactly

who you are, but don't force it because I'll never forget. Like I

felt a pretty intense like ministry calling on my life in high school. And

that's a story for another time, but I remember the first thing my dad

told me was still go to the UDUB. Like I would expect my pastor

father to be like, oh, make sure you are and nothing against Bible

called or anything go you know, like shout out Northwest towns up baby,

But like he was still like, this is what you felt called to,

was to be within the world, Like let that be your life, let

that be your story. And I think there's a there's probably pressure amongst pastors

to want to force their kids into into faith, and I think that's ultimately

what can cause them to steer away from it. So yeah, definitely,

pastors sometimes tend to strongly encourage their kids to stay in the family business and

pursue ministry. But yeah, also for the record, if anyone was upset

when Rachel and I joined like for attorneys and sororities, this guy right here

is the main He was the main proponent in that he wanted us to do

that. He wanted us to be, you know, in the world and

not obviously fall away from Jesus or anything like that. But well, I

think it was for me again the reason I actually truly found the Lord on

my own. So I'm really grateful that he encouraged that. But did you

want to say something I was go ahead, was would be your advice that

you would give you love those little kids so we love them. I mean,

in the same just kind of idea that Elijah was saying. I think

I'm trying to pick my words here. I think it can be easy to

you know, want your kids to be and again there's nothing wrong with any

of these things, but can be easy to make want your kids to be

in private school and then go to a private college and like really be pushing

for either like a career in ministry or just you know, constantly putting your

kids only in environments that are around Christian kids. And I think the I

remember even when we were in elementary school that you and mom intentionally wanted us

to be in public school so that we would see, you know, what

other people's lives were like outside of church, kids that did not grow up

in church, kids that were not Christians, and it would also give us

a ministry opportunity to those people. And it also would make us, you

know, more understanding of other people's lives besides just Christian life, and that

there are other other lives. And so I would just encourage that. I'm

not saying that it has to be just with school, but just in general,

like, give your kids the opportunity to be around kids that didn't grow

up in church, and not only is it a ministry opportunity for them,

but it helps them be understanding of what other lives look like, and it

helps them, you know, yeah, be more relate more to people outside

of just relating over Christianity, because ultimately our goal as Christians is to minister

to people and bring them to the Lord. And you just got to create

and I loved having opportunities for that from a young age, and so just

creating those Yeah, trust that that foundation that you built within your kids when

they were young is gonna like withstand the test of time. We'll always go

back home, you know what they say. Last question, and this is

from some of my staff. Besides the fact that your mom and dad pastor

of the church, so that's you can't say that one. Why do you

love at ten? Name Venture? Elijah? You first? Why do you

love attending Venture? So many things? Oh, just one thing? Goodness,

I mean, no offense, but it's like not actually because you a

mom passed the church, like I legitimately just love the church. I'd say

probably the pastoral staff. I mean is that like I know you're included in

that. So that's kind of late. But like the amount of like ministering

I've received from a Morgan Butcher or a Tony Mattar that like I think is

like has completely altered my life. I think that's what one big reason.

And then we're like, my bonus is worship. I love the worship at

Venture. We have a great staff, and we also have the best worship

in the state. Is there you go? I hit both of them,

Rachel, good, look, yeah, I mean similar, I keep saying

this, but oh, I just said, it's not even really about you

and mom, no offense, especially as an adult like you. Guys are

sometimes not at the church for like weeks on end, but I still go.

And so why do I keep going? Well, it's because for me,

the people. I just think. I tried a few other churches while

I was in college because it was quite a commute for me. It wasn't

even that bad at a commute, but I just was trying things that were

more local. And the biggest thing that I noticed was that Venture has that

makes it stand apart and makes people want to keep coming is that people notice

you and they check in on you and they make sure that you know you

are loved, and you can't really come in to church and not be noticed.

And I know we've said we say that a lot as a church,

but I think that that's so unique, especially as our church is growing,

that we're still able to do that. And I know that if I wasn't

at church for a few weeks on end, somebody would reach out to me

and be asked where I am and if I'm okay, and somebody would tell

me like there for me, if I'm going through a tough time, and

I just think the relationships that I've built and the discipleship I've gotten from those

relationships has been so impactful in my life and why I know I will raise

my children adventure one day. Well, there you have Adventure. You've heard

from the Pek's at your church and they were unfiltered, shared everything they wanted

to. I want to thank you guys. You guys did awesome. Judah,

you were amazing. Do you want to let everybody know what we're going

to be doing next week? Next week is going to be really fun.

I think you're going to enjoy it. We have been in the middle of

a series called Wanderlust, really seeking out God's will for your life, how

you hear God's voice. And we have a lot of college age, a

lot of twenty somethings at Venture, and I asked our young adult pastor and

one of our young adult leaders to join me on the podcast and they have

been writing down questions that they have about really seeking God's direction in your life

and questions that they have specifically for me. One of the things that we

do with the interns is I will sit down with the interns and they will

just ask me questions, and I'll write all their questions on a whiteboard,

and then one at a time, I'll answer those questions. So you are

going to get an opportunity to have Pastor Claire and Hannah Peterson ask me questions

specifically about determining God's will in your life. And we will do that next

week, and then the following week after that, my bald co host will

be joining us once again, and the question is we're all wondering has Tony

lost more hair? Thanks guys, see you next week. Fo