Fight for Friendship

Good morning, CCW.

Here we go.

I need you to turn your Bibles into 1 Samuel chapter 20.

1 Samuel 20 · chapter mention

Today we're going to be talking really on the relationship of Jonathan and David.

And so the title this morning for the third week of Slay is Fighting for Friendship.

In the early 1970s, there was a coach for UCLA's football team named Pepper Rogers.

And Pepper Rogers was having a real bad season.

And a real bad season for a football coach means a real bad life at the time.

And so he came home one afternoon explaining all the criticism and pressure to his wife.

And he said, Baby, it doesn't seem like I got a friend in the world.

The only friend I got is this dog.

And he said, Every man should have at least two friends in his life.

And so the next day, Pepper Rogers came home, or his wife came home with a surprise for him.

She pulled up and she said, I got you something.

I got you this second dog.

Everybody should have at least two friends.

When I look out at this crowd of people, Heather and I came rolling into Chelsea, Alabama in 2015 in September, and had two friends, Danny Love It and Susan Love It.

And I'm so thankful for friendships because now I look out and I have so many memories with people in this crowd and more to come.

I'm excited about.

I am so thankful for my friendships.

I'm thankful for my family, which is my church.

And so, uh, but friendship is an important thing throughout the Bible.

It's important in church.

353 people were interviewed about the first time they attended a new church.

And out of them, 353 people, 311 said it was the friendliness of the church that captured me.

117 out of 353 welcome desk and greeters.

Guess who they mentioned?

The person they met that greeted them and the people that were at the welcome centers of churches.

So we see that it's evident friendship is vital.

Everybody here wants to belong and have a sense of belongingness in this world.

And so we see in the story of David and Jonathan a great friendship that is worth the fight.

Let me pray this morning.

Father, we love you, and we are so thankful, God, to be in your presence.

And we've already felt it, God.

Just the words and lyrics that we're singing to our Father in praise, God.

Uh, we we just thank you.

And those things are you.

You are the rock of ages.

You are the God that never changes, God.

You have been there for us previous, and God, we know you're gonna do it again.

And so, God, we just thank you for your presence.

The way that you're growing our church, the way that it's a family, God, and and all we want, God, here is your agenda.

We want this place to be your place.

And uh, so God, we ask that you would just take us forward.

And I pray, God, that today that you would forge together this thought of fighting for friendships, Lord, and that we would look.

I know that your word says that the mark of a Christian is the love of the brethren.

So, Father, help us to be ingrained with that, that we gotta love people and be friendly everywhere we go.

We love you.

In Jesus' name.

Amen.

Watch this video.

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Can you hear me now?

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By never being satisfied.

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Until no matter where you go.

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A phrase that's echoed, probably every person here remembers this commercial, and the phrase, can you hear me now?

You've been on your phone before, I'm sure, and said, Can you hear me now?

What about now?

And so uh, point number one this morning we want to drive home is real friends make real listeners.

Can you hear me now?

Make real listeners.

Point number one.

Bernard Baruch said this that most successful people that I have ever known are the ones who do more listening than talking.

More listening.

Are you a good listener?

I'm gonna talk about your friendship quality and your ability to be a friend.

Are you a good listener?

Look at 1 Samuel chapter 20, verses 1 and 2 this morning.

1 Samuel 20:1

It says, Then David fled from Naoth and Ramah and went and said to Jonathan, What have I done?

What is my iniquity and what is my sin before your father that he seeks my life?

So Jonathan said to him, By no means you shall not die.

Indeed, my father will do nothing, either great or small, without first telling me.

And why should my father hide this thing from me?

It is not so.

And so, first thing we see in this letter A is David's problem is confronted.

We see this friendship of David and Jonathan.

David goes before Jonathan.

You remember last week I talked about how Saul, from that point forward, after the singing of David's killing of tens of thousands, Saul came after David continually.

The rest of his life, Saul was on a hunt for David.

And so we see here that this relationship that had been built, because remember, after David killed Goliath, Saul moved David into his house.

So there was a relationship between Saul's son Jonathan and David.

And David comes to Jonathan here, finds him, and says, Listen, your dad is trying to kill me.

And Jonathan's like, No way, that's not happening.

Jonathan, now, who's David's brother-in-law, is saying, Listen, your dad, David says, your dad is really strong.

Remember, tall, big, handsome soul.

And he threw two spears at me.

He's trying to kill me.

And Jonathan is pondering this situation.

Surely not.

He wouldn't be trying to kill you.

No, no, no, no.

He loves you.

You play the harp for him and soothe him when he's distressed.

You've killed Goliath.

He gave you my sister.

And the people have been singing your praises.

The people have been singing your praises.

And Jonathan is struggling to reconcile the best in what he believes about his father and what his best friend is telling him.

How do I go from here?

Well, I want you to see something.

Go back one chapter.

We've got to unpack a little bit.

This is not his first encounter with this idea.

1 Samuel chapter 19.

1 Samuel 19 · chapter mention

I want you to see verses 4 through 6, okay?

So it's not like he entered into this conversation with Jonathan and with David, and there was total ignorance to what was going on.

Look at verse 4 through 6.

It says, Thus Jonathan spoke well of David to Saul, his father, and said to him, let not the king sin against his servant, against David, because he has not sinned against you, and because his works have been very good towards you.

For he took his life in his hands and killed the Philistine, and the Lord brought about a great deliverance.

You saw it, you rejoiced.

Why then will you kill, or why will you sin against innocent blood to kill David without a cause?

So Saul heeded the voice of Jonathan, and Saul swore, as the Lord lives, he shall not be killed.

Then Jonathan called David, and Jonathan told him these things.

So after chapter 18, where we saw that uh Saul threw these spears at David, David and Jonathan convene, and then we see this.

He's able to stay in the house a little while, and there's a conversation already.

Now my dad was mad the other day, David, but he swore.

He swore.

In verse 2, in chapter 20, he said, I know he would tell me.

If he meant to do this, I know.

Wouldn't he?

And Jonathan's having this, wouldn't he tell me?

Do we have this relationship?

He would tell me, right?

He wouldn't hide it.

And so you gotta understand that Saul and Jonathan aren't exactly on the same page.

Right?

They're not on the same page.

And if you've ever felt that with a family member, it's a weird place to be in.

And so he's wanting to defend his friend, but he's also wanting to think the best for his father.

Well, let's unpack just a little bit more.

Go to 1 Samuel chapter 14.

1 Samuel 14 · chapter mention

Okay, before David ever came on the scene, there was stuff going on between Jonathan and Saul.

Look at verse 6 and 7 of 1 Samuel 14.

So the Philistines were marching against Israel, and Jonathan, you start to see some of the mutuality between him and David.

You're going to see some characteristics that are similar.

So Jonathan was ready to fight.

Look at verse 6.

Then Jonathan said to the young man who bore his armor, Come, let us go over to the garrison of these uncircumcised, that it may be that the Lord will work for us this day.

So the armor bearer took him over there.

Well, he fights, he sneaks up this side of a cliff.

He's able to kill 20 Philistine men, and God gives them verse 23 of that same chapter.

So the Lord saved Israel that day, and the battle shifted.

Well, we don't have time to unpack all the rest of chapter 14, but basically after that, Saul puts out an oath and says, We're not going to eat anything.

Anyone that eats, the hand of the Lord come against him.

So he makes this rash oath, right?

Saul still, you don't find him fighting.

Okay, you don't find him doing anything here.

But Jonathan goes, he has this victory, and then look at verse 29.

Jonathan said, My father has troubled this land.

And then as you go throughout the end of the chapter, look at verse 43 through 45.

Then Saul said to Jonathan, Tell me what you've done.

He's talking about the oath.

Jonathan broke the oath because he had some honey on a stick.

And Jonathan told him and said, I only tasted a little honey with the end of a rod that it was in my hand.

So now I'm supposed to die.

And Saul answered, Go do so, and more also, for you shall surely die, Jonathan.

But the people, the people said to Saul, You, Shall Jonathan die, who's accomplished this great deliverance?

Certainly not.

As the Lord lives, not one hair of his head should fall to the ground.

So I just want you to see some of the background here that Jonathan and Saul were not on the same page, okay?

And so as David presents this information to his friend, Jonathan's just battling.

I want the best for my dad.

I want to think the best for him.

He's told me that he wouldn't do anything.

But my friend is here saying this before me.

And so it's back and forth.

Now, what you see about Saul throughout this, Saul, I mean, he was tall in height, but he was weak in heart.

He was weak when it came to heart.

He wasn't in a battle.

Man, thank goodness.

We see a little bit about his warrior spirit because Saul, in throughout this, we see him throw three spears, never hits anybody.

Okay, thank goodness Saul didn't have any aim.

Well, this story wouldn't be much good.

And so Saul, after this, he was rejected as king.

He wouldn't come before Goliath.

And so Jonathan knows David has something important to say.

And he opens up his ears.

How good a friend you are has a lot to do with these ears and what you do with them.

Are you a good listener?

Okay?

Are you listening to what people are speaking to you?

Now, this is an example, this is a great example right here of a biblical confrontation done the right way.

Okay?

David has an issue, he brings it before his friend, and he he talks him.

Listen, Matthew 18 says, if you have an issue, you go before your brother, right?

And if you can resolve it, then you've gained a brother.

It says, go directly.

It doesn't say think about it for three to four weeks.

Okay, it says go directly to someone.

Okay?

And then it says if that doesn't work, you take another person or two people so that they can hear everything and everything will be made clear.

There won't be mixed thoughts about what was said.

And so it doesn't say think about it or or or ponder on it for a long time.

First, you should pray, go directly.

Okay, now listen to me because some of you you've got some confrontation in your life.

This is about a biblical wrong.

Okay, if you can go to the Bible and point out the biblical wrongness to something, then you go to them and you confront them.

I'm not talking about feelings.

Because your feelings will change on you.

Right?

I'm not talking about a feeling problem.

I felt like this happened.

You made me feel this way, but a biblical wrong where you can say scripture verse, this is what happened, right?

You go directly.

And then when it's over, you get back to serving.

Right?

If you're forgiven, it says you've gained a brother.

It doesn't mean, though, that things are completely the same.

When we sin against someone, there's consequences of sin.

But that gets you in the back the right direction.

Galatians 6.1 says it this way Brethren, ye which are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of meekness, unless you be tempted.

So we go trying to restore.

And don't forget Ephesians 4.32.

It says, Be ye tender-hearted one to another, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake has forgiven you.

And so we go with a spirit to resolve and restore.

And that's what David is doing here.

He just wants resolution, right?

And we'll see later on his respect for the king in the way that he handles himself.

He has nothing in him where he wants to become violent against Saul.

And so he just wants this solved.

Let me tell you about non-biblical confrontation, okay?

And I think it's kind of rampant in the world we live in.

I'm afraid so.

What happens is something we're wronged, and then we gossip, and then we complain, and then we have a uh passive-aggressive social media post.

Uh I won't say their name, but I'll talk about the situation in a post form or a picture that I post.

And then I uh rinse, recycle, and repeat, gossip, complain, and post again.

And so nothing ever is solved, and I just stay angry, right?

I'm just angry, and I I want to go kind of pout about it, and I want somebody to join me in the corner and let's have a pout fest.

But I really the truth is I really don't have the guts to fix it.

Because guts says I get face to face, right?

We got an issue, we go and deal with the issue.

And so um, Jonathan here, he hears David out.

Letter B is this this morning.

David pleads for comfort.

David pleads for comfort, and so what he says to him, look at verse 3 and 4.

Then David took an oath and said, Your father certainly knows that I have found favor in your eyes.

And he said, Do not let Jonathan know this, lest he be grieved.

But truly, as the Lord lives and as your soul lives, Jonathan, there is but a step between me and death.

So Jonathan said to David, Whatever you yourself desire, I'll do it for you.

And so this friendship here, he's pleading.

He says, I need your help.

I'm gonna die without help.

Jonathan, I need you.

People in this life church, apart from your intervention, maybe they'll physically die, but I can promise there's people without you financially, they might fall apart.

Spiritually, certainly, you are what God has sent to this earth to be the hands and feet of someone who can intervene.

There is a world in need of you.

And God's put you right in your place so that you can affect that word.

Listen, here's what you do.

You say, How do I what do I do about that?

Just ask.

Just ask somebody.

Ask them, how are you doing?

And then open those ears.

What do you need?

And then open those ears.

Look around at their situation and see what's in front of you and be those hands and feet.

And so listen to what it says there.

Don't miss this.

It says he made an oath.

That's an important word.

An oath.

Okay, we don't use that a lot these days, but I want you to understand what it means.

The importance of that word, it's the Hebrew word shavu'ah.

Shavua, the Hebrew word, is connected to the Hebrew number seven, which is Shiva.

Okay, the number seven, which means holy, complete, and listen, it's very binding.

The given oath was very binding.

In fact, uh Abraham named a place, beersheba, which is the well of seven.

Same word there that's connected, the well of seven, like the seven-day week, okay, which starts at the beginning of the week and ends when its cycle is completed in a full circle.

And so a promise when it's given ends when it's fulfilled.

And so he's given this shavua, an oath.

And that means it's not over till it's been fulfilled.

Okay?

And so he's given an oath.

In fact, James 5, there's such a strength to it in the New Testament.

It said, Don't take an oath.

Don't take an oath.

Don't even take an oath.

Interesting about this word shavuah that has relationship to seven.

Can you guess how many times the Hebrew word in Old and New Testament shows up in the Bible?

Anybody?

Seven times.

I don't know about you, but sometimes our God is just cool the way he laid things out, right?

He just decided this word that means seven is going to show up seven times for us to think on.

And so, listen to me.

All options for David here, and he absurdly, I say that because of the situation, throws himself at the king's son.

Can you imagine being in that place?

And you think, listen, we get in some trouble.

We get in some situations where we need help, but probably not too many here have been on the doorstep of death.

And you needed a person to get you away from that.

And David is here and he says, Listen, it's your dad trying to kill me, but he's asking that, son.

How crazy.

He says, I need your help.

I gotta have your help.

And Jonathan, listen, I want you to understand something so serious must denote a really special friendship.

A really close friendship.

1 Corinthians 1 9 talks about the bond of the Christian, right?

And it says we're bonding together by the gospel of Jesus Christ.

That's a special friendship because we share the things we have seen and heard and experienced of God.

And so it gives us this immediate bond.

And so when you've experienced the glorious things of Jesus, when you've worshiped together, when you've committed things together, then we have this Christian bond.

You can't explain it to people out in this world that have their different kinds of bonds.

A Christian bond is different.

It's this fellowship, this unity.

And here's the thing about it it's deep and it's eternal.

Our Christian relationships don't end here.

No other relationship is like that.

Our bond is eternal.

And so I need you to see a little bit more about David and Jonathan.

Go back to 1 Samuel chapter 18.

1 Samuel 18 · chapter mention

About their relationship.

Look at verses 1 through 3.

Now, when he had finished speaking to Saul, the soul, listen to that, the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David.

And Jonathan loved him as his own soul.

Saul took him that day and would not let him go home to his father's house anymore.

Then Jonathan and David made a covenant because he loved him as his own soul.

There's no mistake when the Bible says to love your neighbor as yourself.

He said he loved him like his own soul.

Listen, after David killed Goliath, Saul took David into his home, and it says that the soul of his son, Jonathan, became knit.

The same word is used in Psalms when it says that you were knit together in your mother's womb before you were ever born.

And it's this idea of wovenness, interlaced, that we've been woven together.

We've been knit together.

Y'all remember the movie Forrest Gump?

And Forrest said, me and Jenny was like peas and carrots from that day forward.

Right?

Like woven.

They were together.

They were tied together, right?

My wife is amazing.

And I look over at her this Christmas, and there she is, knitting.

Never seen her knit before.

Knitting together, weaving together a blanket.

I'm like, I didn't even know she had yarn.

Didn't know she had the tools.

Never seen her do it before.

And there she is.

She's just going and she's making people that she loves blankets.

I'd go somewhere, I'd come back, and there she was, just focused, just weaving and putting this blankets, and I don't even know how many she made.

She made a lot.

But she was laboring over these blankets, weaving them together.

I don't know how many hours.

You know, when it comes to me and gifts, I'm like, Amazon, save me.

You know, like I don't even want to go to the store.

More than less, I'm not spending 10 hours weaving up blankets.

Are you with me, man?

Somebody.

Can I get an amen from somebody?

But there she was, weaving, knitting, and I'm like, wow.

Wow.

But the longer I'm married to her, and I promise she's not even in the room, she's cooking for lunch, but um, the longer I'm married, the more I see that for me, Heather is the most caring person I know.

Um I'm not just cashing in points.

Heather is my best friend, and there are times with your best friends, she can be about to say a word and it comes out of my mouth.

Y'all with me?

She can, I can pick up my phone, I'm getting ready to call her, and she says, hello.

And I'm like, what?

Like, we're that woven together.

We've had 20 years of life experiences and back and forth, and we've seen the same movies, and we've had these experiences, and so the words come out the same, and the thoughts almost the same often.

And so we, I know this, are knit together.

And I know this about that friendship.

Heather listens to me when I can't talk to anyone else.

We cry, we laugh, we pray together.

I know this, we are knit together.

And so when it says David and Jonathan are knit, I want you to feel the weight of what it's saying that their friendship was so tight.

And it has to do with mutuality, mutual values, where you started from.

You will not get that close to some people because you're a world apart on foundations, right?

The Bible says that you shouldn't be unequally yoked together with an unbeliever.

It's gonna be real hard or should be real hard for you to be real close with someone that's not a Christian.

And so, mutual values, mutual goals, where you're headed, right?

If you're with somebody, you hear this in marriages often, and it's sad, but someone says, Well, I was headed this way and they weren't on the same page.

And so that mutual, those goals, those those activities you like, right?

Mutual affections for those things.

I want you to understand, not everyone is supposed to be your best friend.

And that's okay.

That's okay.

It has to do with a lot of your makeup and their makeup.

That's okay.

What is mutual?

What is your like?

Now, the you know, the the groupings of friendships are acquaintances, right?

Anybody can be an acquaintance.

Then you have casual friends, people you feel comfortable, more like one-on-one's okay.

Um, and then close, which are people that you would share a lot of things with, and then you have intimate friendships, which if you have five intimate friendships in this life, you have a good thing.

Right.

Count yourself to be blessed.

And so I know that I have some intimate friendships.

Um, but I know this that Heather is my most intimate friend.

I have some others.

You don't have to be everyone's intimate friend.

Some people get you know upset or jealous about friendships.

You can become close to anyone in the body.

Listen, you can be casual or close friends to about anybody in the body of Christ because you have that bond and the fellowship of Christianity.

And so you can get close to Christians.

But I want you to think about some questions because you should not be close to everyone.

Everyone does not have your best interest in mind.

I'm gonna say that again.

Everyone does not have your best interest in mind.

Some questions for you to ask about friendships.

I want you to write these down if you got this.

Is good.

About your friendships.

Am I a better Christian because of it?

Your friendships.

Am I a better Christian because of this friendship?

Think through.

The people that you're spending time with, am I becoming a better Christian?

What about this?

Am I sinning less because of this friendship?

Am I becoming more and more like Jesus?

Am I sinning less because of this friendship?

Third thing I want you to ask: am I ever talking about the Bible?

If you can meet week after week, month after month, dinner after dinner with people, and the Bible never shows up in your conversation.

I don't know.

I don't know if that's the best friendship for you.

Think about those three things.

Does it ever come?

Do you ever hear them say, you know, I was reading the other day?

If you're not hearing that, it's probably because they're not, because we're like proud Christians, are we not?

I've been reading, so I'm telling somebody, right?

Lee, I'm gonna tell you.

Look, I need you to hear this scripture, right?

And so you talk about what you do.

Probably means they're not.

Can you be friendly to everyone?

Absolutely.

It doesn't mean they have to be your close, intimate friend.

In fact, I want you to see in 1 Corinthians chapter 5, an important scripture.

1 Corinthians 5 · chapter mention

You know, what we're told about friendships.

Look at verse number 11.

1 Corinthians 5, 11.

It's talking about the path of friendship in your life.

But now I've written 1 Corinthians 5 11.

Now I have written to you not to keep company with anyone named a brother who is sexually immoral or covetous or jealous or an idolater or a reviler, listen now, or a drunkard, hear me, church, or an extortioner, not even, listen to what it says, not even to eat with such a person.

You can be kind to anybody, church.

You can be friendly to anybody, but if they fall in them categories, I'm gonna tell you right now, they are not helping you.

If they're calling you to do these things that the Bible says you saw it, it's right there.

Okay, they're not helping you.

They're not good for you.

And listen, if you see a friend going down that road, yes, do everything you can to stop it.

Stop them, go to them, like Matthew 18 says.

Go in hopes of resolving and gaining a brother.

But listen, those things ought not to be.

Let me tell you four things that make a good listener, and then we'll get to the second point.

Four things that make a friend a good listener.

James 1:19 tells us the formula.

James 1:19

It says, be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.

It's interesting.

Listen and the word silent have the same exact letters in them.

Just a thought, Pastor Danny would say.

Listen and silent.

Right?

Same letters.

Listeners, they do four things well.

One, they're ponderers.

They're slow to speak.

They're gonna think through what you're saying.

The second thing about a good listener, they're patient.

They're not so quick, ready to give an answer.

They're patient, listening, hearing you out.

That's what a listener does.

Does.

Proverbs 18 13 says, He that answers a matter before he hears it, it's folly and shame to him.

Right?

If you get in a conversation with someone and they're just quick to fix everything and not hearing you out, wait back and say, listen, are you even say say to him, say, Are you listening?

Get them to listen.

They're patient.

The next thing that they do, it does, a listening prepares us for what we're gonna say.

A good listener is being prepared by listening.

And the fourth thing a good listener does is they ask perceptive questions, perception.

Right?

Jonathan had a lot to ponder here.

The severity of the accusation calls for a significant decision, a determination, and that's point number two this morning.

Real friends make real decisions.

Real friends make real decisions.

There's gotta be a decision here.

There was a poem I found this week to every man there opens a way and ways and a way.

And some men climb the highway, and some men grope below.

And in between, on the misty flats, the rest drift to and fro.

And to every man there opens a highway and a low.

And every man decides which way he shall go.

It's a decision that you and me have to make.

We have to be deciders.

James 1 22 tells us to be ye doers of the word, not hearers only.

I told the teens for a whole year, don't be a donor, be a doer, be someone who can decide.

And so you have to come to a point with friendships where you make decisions.

Well, how does David and Jonathan get there?

Letter A.

Jonathan looks at facts to determine position.

He looks at the facts.

Let's look for verses five through eight.

And David said to Jonathan, Indeed, tomorrow is the new moon, and I shall not fail to sit with the king to eat.

But let me go that I may hide in the field until the third day at evening.

If your father misses me at all, dinner, and say, David earnestly asked permission of me that he might run over to Bethlehem, his city, for there is a sacrifice for the family.

If he says, It is well, your servant, David, will be safe.

But if he is angry, be sure that evil is determined by him.

Therefore you shall deal kindly with your servant, for you have brought your servant into a covenant of the Lord with you.

So he lets out this situation, and he says, If your father notices at dinner time that I'm gone, that I'm missing, ask him permission to come and see about my family, that we're at a yearly sacrifice.

If Saul says, okay, then we'll know that he's okay with me.

If he's angry, be sure he wants me dead.

So again, Jonathan is put in this position, family or friend.

Family or friend.

And so for you and me today, you gotta understand a fake friendship will hit the road when trouble hits.

Yeah.

When trouble hits, if you got real friends, they'll stick around.

Jonathan is put into a position to consider whether David was saying the truth.

My sons.

Wyatt will make Weston cry over Weston wanting to get into his bedroom.

I mean, he'll have the kid in tears, right?

Because Weston just wants to come in and be around him.

But Wyatt has saved Weston's life twice.

I mean, he was choking on some food, and Wyatt, I mean, as quick as he could say the word, he's like, Daddy, had his finger in his mouth, pulled stuff out.

I was like, oh man.

I mean, he saved his life.

He loves the kid, but sometimes he just don't want to be around him, right?

When Wyatt went down the hill in our neighborhood and crashed and up getting a concussion, I had no control of the situation around me.

I had a broken hamstring or whatever was wrong with it.

And I'm getting down there and I'm over Wyatt and I'm trying to see this thing through.

And I totally forget that the six-year-old is even a part of the equation.

It's dark.

He runs home.

I don't even know how to tell Heather on the phone where we are, but Weston gets home for help because he wants to take care of big brother, right?

I know that there's love, and so listen, don't miss the severity and weight of this.

You all know you can get upset with family, but somebody else better not be talking about them.

Oh, I can be upset with mama, but don't you dare even talk about family.

You know what I'm saying?

And so don't miss the weight of how deep this is, right?

And so what a position for David and Jonathan.

Real friends, though, operate, I know this, in truth.

So what does Jonathan look for?

He looks for the facts.

1 John 3 18 says this church.

Let's not love in word or in speech, but in actions and truth.

The Bible says the truth shall what?

Okay?

The Bible says that we gird ourselves in the armor of God with the belt of truth.

And that that truth, that belt, brings all the other armor together.

And so truth is armor against Satan.

It's truth that pulls the rest of the foundation together.

And so Jonathan does the only thing he knows to do, and he operates in the scenario under facts and truth.

You know, the enemy, what he'll do to you in a scenario like this, he'll plant lies.

He'll let you hear some gossip.

He would rather you form an opinion of the majority than ever hear the truth.

He would rather you listen to a little bit of exaggeration.

Church, hear me.

It is wrong to entertain talk of other people.

It's wrong to entertain people talking about other people.

That in scripture is called gossip.

It's wrong.

If you're willing to talk about somebody, how about you be willing to go and talk to that somebody?

Can I get it?

Amen.

Satan would rather you never, ever have a biblical confrontation.

And people say that, well, I don't want to have a confrontation.

Confrontation is bothering me.

Well, of course it bothers you.

The word itself is bothersome.

Confrontation.

Right.

It's not supposed to be happy, you know, it's not pretty.

But he would rather you never, ever have a biblical confrontation where you got to involve the Bible because we remember we have a biblical issue or prayer or two Christians to get together under that.

No, what he would like for you to do is have some half-truth, have some gossip, have some avoid.

Oh, we got to avoid each other, right?

Because now it's awkward.

So we're going to avoid.

And despite all of the immense difficulty of the situation, I love Jonathan because he says, I'm going to look at the facts.

That's all I can do right here, is just look at the facts.

And I'm going to tell you when it comes down to the bottom line of life, church, the truth is all we can look at.

The truth will let you sleep good at night.

The truth is what we have.

And so he says, I'm going to look at the facts.

Well, that takes us to letter B this morning.

Jonathan doesn't falter due to pressure.

I got a video I want you to see that, man, what pressure is going on in this video.

I want you to see.

And it got real nasty in his life because of that.

Um Bill There's a 30 for 30 on it, a whole segment about how fans and people mistreated him.

But there was a lot of pressure in that moment and game six left, and then the met they came back and won the next.

The Red Sox didn't win.

The curse continued.

And so, but man, the pressure.

When pressure rises, what is it like for us?

I want you to hear what Paul had to say about pressure in 2 Corinthians 4.

He said, We're troubled on every side, yet not distressed.

We're perplexed yet not in despair.

We've been persecuted, but not forsaken.

We've been cast down, but not destroyed.

Listen, life and trials and a sinful earth are going to happen.

You're going to have pressure and you're going to have trial and you're going to have struggle.

That's not the good news today.

It's truth.

Listen, it's all through the Bible.

You remember Samson?

And Samson fell to pressure.

Oh, Delilah came in, batting her eyes.

And she said, Hey, big boy.

Won't you tell me the secret?

And you know what he said?

Hey there, Delilah.

I can't tell you the secret, Delilah.

Right?

And so under pressure, Samson fell after she pranced on in.

Judas, 30 pieces of silver.

Can you imagine?

Give up Jesus.

I mean.

It's like y'all remember the million-dollar man, Ted DiBiassi.

He said, everybody's got a price.

Judas for 30 pieces of silver.

One hung himself after it.

Couldn't take the guilt and shame.

Saul, King Saul that we've been talking about, should have fought Goliath.

Head and shoulders above the rest, the king of the land.

He should have been the one.

He got so jealous because of pressure and people talking about David and his popularity.

And because of it, Saul was premeditating murder.

Pressure.

Jonathan didn't falter.

I want you to see verse 27 through 32, what happens after they made this oath together and what comes to fruition.

Verse 27, 1 Samuel 20, it says, And it happened the next day, the second day of the month, that David's place was empty.

And Saul said to Jonathan, his son, Why has the son of Jesse not come to eat, either yesterday or today?

So Jonathan answered Saul.

David earnestly asked permission of me to go to Bethlehem.

And he said, Please let me go, for our family has a sacrifice in the city, and my brothers commanded me to be there.

And now if you have if I found favor in your eyes, please let me go.

And my brothers, therefore, he has not come to the king's table for dinner.

Listen to Saul.

Verse 30.

Then Saul's anger was aroused against Jonathan, and he said to him, You son of a perverse, rebellious woman, do I not know that you have chosen the son of Jesse to your own shame and to the shame of your mother's nakedness?

For as long as the son of Jesse lives on earth, you shall not be established, nor your kingdom.

Now therefore send and bring him to me, for he shall surely die.

And listen to a friend's voice here.

The facts.

Jonathan said to his father Saul, why?

Why should he be killed?

What has he even done?

Then Saul cast a spear to kill his own son.

And so we see here Saul is irate.

I mean, he cusses him out, talks about his mama, you'll never be king.

What's he done?

Proverbs 17, 17.

Hear me this if you want to be a good friend.

It says, A friend loves at all times, but a brother, hear me, is born for adversity.

When pressure mounts, you're gonna find out who friends are.

You'll find out who stays, who believes in you, who hopes in you.

And you're gonna find out who's ready to go.

If you want to know who your real friends are, it's when pressures arise.

Where are they?

When you mess up, hear me.

Where are your friends?

When you are scared, where are your friends?

When it's gonna cost them, where are your friends?

How did Jonathan make that difficult decision and stand by it even so?

He could have stayed with his family, he could have stayed right there, worked it out, been still the prince.

It takes us to point number three.

How did he stand by that decision?

This is how.

Point three is real friends make real promises.

You ever swore anything to anyone?

The great theological writers, Baker and Myers, pen these iconic words.

I can see the question in your eyes.

I know what's weighing on your mind.

You can be sure I know by part.

And I swear, by the moon and the stars in the sky, I'll be there.

And I swear, like the shadow that's by your side, I'll be there.

I was not gonna sing it.

I knew the version by all for one.

You country folk out here probably knew the version by John Michael Sumgomery, whatever his name is, something.

So much of my 14-year-old love life could have been captured by this song.

I swear.

The moon and the stars for you, baby.

I swear.

I swear, but when we say certain words, what do they mean?

Letter A is this we see a promise between friends.

If you go back to verse 16 and 17, I need you to see another word.

So we talked about oath, but there's another word here that's different from oath.

Verse 16.

So Jonathan made a covenant.

Keep that word with the house of David, saying, Let the Lord require that they at the hand of David's enemy.

Now again, cause David to vow because he loved him, for he loved him as he loved his own soul.

So oath was a word that is a word that's a pledge of truth.

When I oath with somebody, I make a pledge of truth between somebody.

It's that completion.

I'm going to see this true.

But a covenant is a binding legal agreement to do a thing, it's a life and death guarantee.

Now, I don't know if this number is true, but there's 7,000, I found this this week and say, 7,487 promises or word pledges from God to mankind in Scripture.

There are five covenants.

A covenant is a serious thing.

There's the Noahic covenant, Abrahamic covenant, Moses, Davidic covenant, and then the covenant of grace where Jesus Christ came to us.

And so a covenant is a legal binding matter.

So it says they covenanted.

How could Jonathan keep to this?

And Jonathan would probably say to you, How could I not?

How could I not keep my word?

I made a binding agreement between a friend, a blood brother.

I could not not keep it.

You want to find out about promises?

I've been for 16 years I worked with teenagers, and uh teenage signup sheets are a comical thing.

So every activity used to, I quit doing it.

Used to every activity, we'd have a sign-up sheet three, four weeks out, and kids write their name, and the funniest thing to me, a kid will write their name and put a question mark at the end.

Like, what does that even mean?

I'm signing up question mark, which meant what I came to find out that it meant was I want you to save me a spot unless something, anything, possibly a thing greater or close to greater could show up, then I don't want to go.

I'm signing up, I want you to save me a spot, maybe pay in advance for my spot, but if something comes up the question marks there, Pastor Rick, you can't come hunting me down.

Right?

And so the promise I just stopped having them.

I just take a guess.

I stopped doing sign-up sheets.

I'm like, eh, we're gonna be somewhere.

I'm gonna call the people, we're somewhere between 25 and 50, give or take 15.

Give me your best rate.

That's the way it goes.

We're gonna need three to five vans, people.

So I don't know.

I just stopped because there's no clarity in it.

Uh, you want to find out about the promise of your friends?

Just make this announcement at the next gathering.

Hey guys, in two weeks, we're gonna be moving.

Who can help me?

Right?

You want to find out about the promise of friends?

Propers?

Y'all just okay?

Look, look.

You want to find out?

That is why at this level of your life, you may only have a few intimate friends, like this David and Jonathan, because people, people are too busy to keep up with promises.

And that's a sad statement, but it's a true statement.

Matthew 5, 33 through 37 said this: Do not break an oath, but keep the oaths you've made to the Lord.

I tell you, do not swear at all.

Just let your yea be yea and your nay be nay.

It is against God's character to break a covenant.

He is a commitment keeper.

Numbers 23, 19 says this about God.

He's not a man that he should lie, nor a son of man that he should change his mind.

And so God is most pleased in the way that we keep our promises when we give them.

God is pleased by the honesty and the truth and the dependability of the Christian.

Satan, conversely, is the father of lies.

When he speaks and lies, he's speaking his native language.

He's speaking his native tongue.

A marker of our Christianity church ought to be the veracity of our word.

What does your word mean?

A marker of the Christian ought to be the veracity, the truth of our word.

Are you a dependable friend?

Do you mean what you say?

That takes us to letter B.

There was the promise of friends.

The letter B is the protection of friends.

Go to verse 41 and 42.

So Jonathan sees this unfold after David and Jonathan had spoken about it.

And Jonathan goes, 41.

As soon as the lad had gone, David arose from a place toward the south, fell on his face to the ground, and bowed down three times.

Previous to that, we see that Jonathan comes, he shoots three arrows, which was the sign, saying, My father's angry, you've got to go.

Remember how tight they were, how close they were.

Jonathan did not want their relationship to end and had no idea if this would mean he would ever see David again.

And so he shoots these arrows.

Look what it says.

Friend, I don't know if I'm ever gonna see you again.

Man, Christians, could we have a love bond like this?

You think Satan can bring anything against this church if we've got a bond like this?

Man, if you got friendships like this, if you look around you and we're arm in arm like this, this is a covenant of real friendship and the protection of it.

I want you to understand in 2 Samuel 1, we don't have time to go through all of this, but in 2 Samuel 1, Jonathan gave his life, allowing David to become king.

There's a profound moment.

I do want you to see, go back to 1 Samuel chapter 18.

1 Samuel 18 · chapter mention

There's a profound moment that happens in their relationship that you might just miss it if you weren't looking real closely.

1 Samuel 18, 4.

So it talks about that, them being knitted together, and verse 4 it says, and Jonathan here took off the robe that was on him, and he gave it to David with his armor, even to his sword and his bow and his belt.

Now, if you read that, you might just miss it.

But what I want you to see here is that the prince was willing to become the pauper, for the pauper to become the prince.

The prince exchanged his robe, his armor, his sword, his bow, and his belt.

This is not an insignificant happening.

When someone saw David that day, they might have mistaken him.

There goes the prince.

This was a picture of love that was both personal and profound in sacrifice.

Please don't miss the weight of what happens here.

If you want to turn your Bibles to Philippians chapter 2, verse 5 through 8, this is how it happens.

Philippians 2:5–8

It's me and you, Christ Jesus.

Philippians 2 says, who being in the form of God did not consider it robbery to be equal with God.

He was right in line with God.

It says he made himself of no reputation, taking the form of bond servant, and coming in the likeness of men, being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself to become obedient to death, even the death of the cross.

And so Jesus laid aside his own glorious robes to come be our protection.

Jesus took off his kingdom, his gloriousness, so that one day you and I could be adopted by the King.

He exchanged it so that a sinner like me, so that a way could be made for the paupers poor like me, so that I could one day be a child of the King, clothed in his righteousness.

Romans 5.8 says, I didn't even do anything.

It says, while I was yet a sinner, he died for us.

So one day in heaven, I get to sit around the throne of Jesus.

Because Jesus gave up all of glory for me.

David didn't do anything special to earn this favor.

Neither did we, church.

That's what grace is.

Listen, 1 John 4 10 says, not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his son to be the propitiation for us.

Jonathan, what a friend! What a friend Jonathan was.

He would give his life in battle, causing David to ascend to the throne.

What a friend.

Church Jesus gave his life in a battle.

So you who were never his friend previously could have the chance to choose.

Listen to me, to choose whether or not you would become his child.

Their bond came from a common obedience, a belief in the power of God.

What a friendship.

What a bond, church, we can have in Jesus.

What a friend.

I want you to know something, church.

No one ever cared for me like Jesus.

And that's the story of Charles Weigel.

I don't know if you've heard that name.

Heather and I attended Tennessee Temple University, and for a long time I had no idea why we had the Charles F.

Weigel music department.

I didn't know what it meant.

One day, I think after I graduated, I the name came to my mind, and so I looked it up.

Charles Weigel.

Weigel was a gifted and amazing communicator of the gospel and an evangelist and sang amazing.

Weigel explains about his song entitled No One Ever Cared for Me Like Jesus.

That he came home from a glorious crusade.

Pastor, 800 people were saved.

Can you imagine evangelizing, giving the gospel?

And droves, just stroves, kept on coming.

He said it was so glorious.

And he came home from this crusade.

When he got home, his house was empty.

His wife left him.

Charles was brokenhearted.

Defeated.

So several days later, he sat down at the piano and he panned these words.

In 20 minutes, listen to him.

I would love to tell you what I think of Jesus.

Since I found in him a friend so strong and so true.

I would tell you how he changed my life completely.

He did something that no other friend could do.

The second verse says, All my life was full of sin, and Jesus found me.

All my heart was full of misery and woe.

Jesus placed his strong and loving arms about me, and he led me in the way that I should go.

No one ever cared for me like Jesus.

There's no other friend so kind as he.

No one else could take the sin and darkness from me.

Oh, how much he cared for me.

Church.