Sermon
Mother's Day 2026
Publisher transcript
Transcript
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all you ladies a very happy Mother's Day. Normally
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we find ourselves in a sermon series. I'm in
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the book of Matthew chapter 13 looking at the
Matthew 13 chapter mention
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kingdom of God and about every other year we
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usually look at Mother's Day. There's not a lot
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of passages there, but if I feel really like
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this is something the church needs to hear or
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something I had to say, then we will usually
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stop the series and every other year look at
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this. And so I want to look this morning in the
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second chapter of Titus. And we're going to look
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at verses 1, 3 through 5, and verse 14. That
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will serve as our text. Paul is writing to Titus,
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a young man that's left. To help regulate a church
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that's being formed on the island of Crete. And
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we'll get to that in a moment. But he writes,
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in the first chapter he's explaining how bad
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the culture of Crete was. Second chapter he's
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saying, hey, here's what you do in the church.
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So verse 1 he says, And verse 2 he talks about
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the men. Older men, specifically. But then verse
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3 he picks it up in his admonitions to the ladies
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in the church. The older women likewise, which
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does mean they're not left out here, that they
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be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not
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given to much wine, teachers of good things,
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that they admonish, and you might have a version
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that says that they teach, that they teach, that
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they admonish the young women to love their husbands,
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to love their children, to be discreet, chaste,
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good, obedient to their own husbands, that the
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word of God may not be blasphemed. And then verse
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14, I think this serves as really the central
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text of chapter 2, speaking of Jesus, who gave
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himself for us, that he might redeem us from
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every lawless deed and purify for himself his
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own special people. who are zealous for good
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works. Let's pray. Father, would you help me
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this morning, Lord? God, I pray that I'd be filled
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with your spirit. Lord, what I would say would
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be derived from the text. Father, help me not
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to impose my own views, but Lord God, I pray
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that you, by your spirit, would illumine the
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text, show us Jesus and his glory, even in the
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second chapter of Titus. We pray this in Christ's
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name. Amen. Growing up, I always heard a proverb,
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and I just assumed it was just that, a proverb.
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And it said this, the hand that rocks the cradle
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is the hand that rules the world. This past week,
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I was just kind of looking at that. I typed it
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into Google, and I realized it's actually a poem
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written in the mid -1800s, 1865. And it's entitled,
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and it's four stanzas. I'm only going to read
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one, The Hand That Rocks the Cradle. But I thought
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this was really good. All four stanzas are good,
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but this is one I chose for time's sake this
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morning. Woman, how divine your mission here
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upon our natal sod. Keep, oh keep the young heart
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open, always to the breath of God. All true trophies
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of the ages are from mother love imperiled. For
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the hand that rocks a cradle is the hand that
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rules the world. So this poem was written in
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praise of mothers showing how they possess immense
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power and influence. And it's true. In nurturing
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and raising children, mothers shape the future
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for better or for worse. Being a mother is a
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blessing, but not all mothers are blessed. Some
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do a horrible job, and they shape their children
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for ill. But God's design, if we look at God's
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design for human civilization, not in the church,
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but for human civilization, we have men and women
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getting married, forming a covenant, and rearing
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children in the fear of God. That is his design.
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So the family, we would say, is the basic building
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block, the basic unit of civilization. So what
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happens when that design is broken? Well, necessarily,
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chaos comes. And sadly, we see this in our own
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culture even today. I was looking up some stats.
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I was telling my wife this yesterday, and they're
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just staggering to me. Today in the U .S., 4
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out of 10 children ages 6 through 18, so that's
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school -age children, are fatherless, meaning
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the father does not, no father, stepfather, no
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father lives in the home. Now let that sink in.
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40 % of children who are in school live in a
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home where no father is present at all. And that's
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a tragedy. And you're like, well, why does that
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matter? Well, it matters a lot. Children without
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a father are four times as likely to be poor,
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twice as likely to drop out of school. If you
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look at 70 % of the high school dropouts, it's
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somehow related to the lack of the father's presence
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in the home. It affects girls even worse. Girls
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without a father are twice as likely to be obese,
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four times as likely to get pregnant in their
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teens. And then if we look at the demographic
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breakdown, poorer communities are even more greatly
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affected. And we'll give you the racial demographic
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for fatherlessness in the United States. So 20
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% of white kids live in a fatherless home. When
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you take the Hispanic community, it rises to
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31%. When you go to the African American community,
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it's 57%. When you're talking about births outside
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of marriage, today in America, 22 % of births
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to white women occur outside of marriage. That
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rises to 54 % of Hispanic women give birth without
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being married. And nearly 70 % of births for
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black women occur outside of marriage. These
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are just stats. You can take them, manipulate
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them, do whatever you want with them. But something
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has gone terribly wrong in American society.
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It's obvious. So we say, what happened? Now again,
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I'm going to suggest to you, before we get into
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the text, I want to give you a cultural overview
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that I think this is where it started. If you
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start looking at stats, you can go back and see
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where things started to dip off precipitously.
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And that was in the 1960s. Where you're like,
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well, what happened in the 1960s? Well, lots
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of things happened. But particularly, it was
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the advent of the birth control pill. So what
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happened? You're like, well, isn't this a stretch?
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Give me a second. The birth control pill separated
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sexual activity from reproduction. So that naturally
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invited promiscuity because one of the deterrents
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was their fear of pregnancy. So now the pill
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is giving rise to reproductive autonomy and they
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are closely linked. So that led in the 70s to
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the legalization of abortion. Now you're probably
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saying, no, Pastor, you're really making a step.
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No. In 1965, there was a Supreme Court case,
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Griswold v. Connecticut, over the birth control
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pill. Can you believe that? Like, that was saying,
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is it legal? And the Supreme Court decided in
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1965, yes, that a woman has a constitutional
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right to privacy regarding reproductive decisions.
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It's a privacy. Well, in 1973, in the Roe v.
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Wade case, the Supreme Court, taking up the case,
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used that precedent from 1965, the birth control
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pill case, As their decision, and they said an
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abortion is a private medical decision between
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a patient and their doctor. So now what happens,
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you have women able to delay childbearing. They're
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pursuing higher education. That's not necessarily
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bad. It's good. They enter into the workforce.
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This now gives them financial means to support
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themselves outside of a marriage. But what we
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also saw at this time is a rise in what is known
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as a no -fault divorce. Usually you had to sue
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for divorce. You couldn't just end your marriage.
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But a no -fault divorce is where neither spouse
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is required to prove wrongdoing, blame, or marital
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misconduct to end the marriage. So in other words,
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a couple can simply claim what is known as irreconcilable
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differences and the marriage is dissolved. Well,
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this started leading to a widespread increase
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in divorce, which then caused children to grow
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up into homes without fathers. which is leading
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to the mess we are currently in. Now, we've sown
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the wind, and we're reaping the whirlwind. Now,
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here's what I want to focus on this morning.
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What are Christians supposed to do as we desire
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to bear faithful witness to Christ in an ever
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-degrading culture? First of all, I'd say don't
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panic. God is on his throne. He is still sovereign.
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God has providentially placed you here on this
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earth at this point in time in history for a
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reason. It's not an accident. It's not happenstance.
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It is the providential sovereign design of God.
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So yes, our culture is bad. That's absolutely
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true. But Christians have actually lived in much
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worse cultures. If you look at the culture before
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the gospel took root in the world. So let's talk
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about a pre -Christian culture. The world...
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was even worse than ours. But the gospel started
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spreading. It took root in the Roman Empire and
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changed culture. Ancient Rome was absolutely
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a quagmire, perverse, absolutely pagan. Seneca,
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the well -known Roman philosopher, here's what
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he said. Now this is the time when, again, around
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the time of the gospel being spread, he wrote
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about, now he's a well -known philosopher in
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Rome. Mad dogs we knock on the head. A natural
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progeny we destroy. We drown even children at
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birth who are weakly and abnormal. And he wasn't
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speaking in hyperbole. We know Cicero, the so
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-called refined and educated Cicero. He said,
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Deformed infants shall be killed. Now that deformity
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could simply mean an unwanted child, a child
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who is sick, a child born with some deformity,
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or a child born with the wrong sex. The couple
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was hoping for a girl and they got a boy, so
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they killed. Roman law at that time saw nothing
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morally wrong with what is known as infanticide,
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killing babies that were already born. In fact,
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it was legal at that time for a parent, a mother,
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to abandon her newborn on the garbage dump in
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a city. You know what the early church did? These
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women would go through the garbage dumps rescuing
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these babies and adopting them. God used his
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people to change the world. But the gospel started
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taking root, started spreading around the Roman
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Empire. Things started to change. And that's
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what I want to focus on this morning. So we're
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looking at the letter to Titus. So if you look
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at 1 Timothy, 2 Timothy, and Titus, those are
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known as the pastoral epistles. The Apostle Paul
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is writing to these young men how to lead and
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organize churches that were being formed. Because
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churches are always formed because we live in
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covenant. We live in community. We're not isolated.
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The church is important. So what they were to
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do, he said, you need to appoint qualified elders,
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leaders. But you're going to have to have some
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combat false teaching, and it was rampant. You're
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going to promote sound doctrine, which is what
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we're going to look at this morning. And I want
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you to make sure that there's orderly conduct
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within the church. Now, Titus was left on an
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island known as Crete. Now, he was there to rightly
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order church or churches that had been founded.
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And if you look at the island of Crete, it was
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absolutely not Christian at all, nor was it friendly
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to a Christian worldview. Stephen Davy, in his
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commentary, writing about the island of Crete,
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this is what we know. Homosexual marriage was
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practiced by emperors and statesmen. Bisexuality
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was the norm, and heterosexuality, exclusive,
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was considered prudish. Older men were known
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to be immature, self -centered. The older women...
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They were drunkards, gossips, younger men, selfish
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younger ladies, abandoned their husbands and
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children. And Paul left Titus in that culture
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and said, you need to allow the church to thrive
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in this hostile environment. Believers were called
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to adorn the gospel, the good news of the saving
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work of Christ, through their transformed lives.
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Chapter 2, verse 14, I already read it. Jesus
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Christ gave himself for us that he might redeem
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us from every lawless deed and purify himself,
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his own special people, his covenant people,
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his chosen people, zealous for good works. So
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Lord Jesus Christ, he gives himself at Calvary.
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Why? He's going to purchase a people. He's going
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to buy them, redeem them. That's what it means.
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He's buying them from the slave market of sin.
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He's going to purify them because we are impure.
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And then he's going to put his spirit in us and
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make us zealous to perform good works. Now what
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are the good works that Christians are to be
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zealous for? In context of chapter 2, part of
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this would be for Christian men and Christian
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women to fulfill their unique role. They're unique,
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exclusive. Christian men have one role, Christian
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ladies have another. So believers' lives should
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be marked by a stark difference from a pagan
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culture in which we live. You and I live in a
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postmodern culture. Let's call it pagan or it's
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quasi -pagan. Now this contrast, where is it
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going to be most readily seen? In the home. Now
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today, because it's Mother's Day, you lucky ladies.
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I'm going to focus on verses 3 through 5. You're
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like, well, what about the men? Well, that's
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Father's Day, all right? So we're at Mother's
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Day today. And here we see older women are to
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show younger women how they are to be Christian
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wives and mothers. Now, they're already Christians.
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Now, for some, I will say, if you're here today
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as a guest, you may see Paul's instruction as
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archaic. Perhaps you would say misogynistic.
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And yet I would say it's the wisdom of God. Look
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at verse 1. But as for you, speak the things
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which are proper for sound doctrine. Okay, here's
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the sound doctrine. This is what I want you to
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teach, Titus. When the church is being formed,
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here's what you're going to do. He talks to the
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men, verse 2, then verse 3. The older women likewise.
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Now here's what I want you to tell them. That
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they be reverent in behavior, not slanders, not
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given to much wine, teachers of good things.
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So Paul begins by talking to older women. And
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he specifically wants them to guide and teach
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the younger women. Now he says older women. He
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does not say older mothers. That's a different
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word. Now in context, most of them would have
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been mothers, but that was not the requirement.
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Now the question I ask is who are the older women?
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And the question I was afraid to answer on Mother's
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Day is talk about who older women are because
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that's not a safe thing to do. But this is the
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thing. They may be younger than you imagine.
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How would I say it? Let me just say this. Older
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women are women who've lived long enough to know
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what matters most. They've got some wisdom. It
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basically, now this is an oversimplification,
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refers to any woman who would have raised her
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children who are now out from the home under
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her care. So that means an older woman could
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potentially be in her 40s. Potentially. And there
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is no maximum age. Now what Paul is saying to
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Titus is, Find women who've already experienced
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the pitfalls and challenges of being a Christian
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wife and a mother and help them help the younger.
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They're to pass on to the younger generation
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what they have gleaned. And let's be honest,
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experience is a pretty good teacher. So the very
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first thing he's talking to the older women,
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he says, but not just any older woman. He said
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the ones that they be reverent in behavior. Now,
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the King James says, as becometh holiness. It
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just means to be godly. These lives, these women's
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lives represent the living God whom they serve.
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They're good representatives. See, it's not enough
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that a woman has simply raised children and are
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now out of the home. Lots of women have done
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that, and they're terrible examples, by the way.
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But if this woman is going to help, she's got
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to set a godly example. Just because a woman
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has age does not mean she has wisdom. And I would
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say to young women in here, listen carefully.
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If someone is going to help guide you, make sure
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their lives are worth imitating. Be very discerning
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who you allow to speak into your life. Because
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there are many, many voices seeking to influence
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young women today. We even hear about influencers
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online. People whose whole job is to influence
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people. But most of them are young and inexperienced.
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So Paul, through Titus, through Pastor Ryan this
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morning, would say, Be careful what voices you
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listen to. The older women that Paul is speaking
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of in the text, he said they're going to be an
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example of a Christian woman that you should
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aspire to become. These women know what life
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is about. And holiness is their objective. And
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he moves on and he says, but they're not slanders,
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not gossips. What the church needs are women
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who honor other ladies. instead of tearing them
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down. We don't need what's typically, stereotypically
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called catty women and trying to make one up
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the other. That's not the church. We need women
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who are going to build each other up. Again,
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Dave in his commentary, he said, the word that
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Paul uses can literally be translated she -devil.
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He is effectively saying the older women shouldn't
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talk like the devil. And how does Satan talk?
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His primary verbal role is accusing. He accuses
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the saints and running down the believers, Revelation
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12 .10. So when we're talking about not a slander,
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this is a woman who has a faithful spirit. She
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can be trusted. Why is this important? Because
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if a younger lady is going to open herself up
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about her struggles in her life, she needs to
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be sure that that information is not going to
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be shared with everyone. Why open yourself up?
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It can be used against you. We need women who
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are locked vaults. Nothing gets out. Keep going
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and we'll go through some of these more quickly
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than others. Not given to much wine. They're
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sober. They have control over what comes out
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of their mouth. No gossip. They also have control
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over what goes into their mouth. Not a lot of
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wine. What he's saying is they're not a slave
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of alcohol. These are not the ladies that are
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dependent. I just need a drink to get me through
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the day. Or what time is it? It's wine time.
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No. The island of Crete, and again, this is important,
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this was known in the ancient world for its wine
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production. So drunkenness was very common in
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Crete, both men and women. Even today, right
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now, Crete is the second largest wine producing
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region in Greece. So these older Christian ladies
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were living counter -culturally. They were not
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filled with wine, rather they were filled with
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the Holy Spirit of God. And we need them. And
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Paul said, make sure you look for these ladies.
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Titus, this is how you set the church in order.
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And he says they need to be teachers of good
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things. When he says teachers, this is not a
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position. It's more of a pattern. Because they
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have lived as faithful examples, they've earned
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the right to mentor. They've earned the right
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to disciple. And I think that as a pastor, this
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is so helpful to me. Because women have different
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problems, different temptations, different struggles
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than men. You can say, well, yes, husbands, Peter
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tells husbands, we are required to live with
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our wives in an understanding way. But let's
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be honest, by and large, for most of us, women
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will still remain a mystery to us. They don't
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think like us. So who better to help these Christian
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young ladies than older ones who've already been
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where they are now? But yet they have godly wisdom.
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Okay, so they're to teach. What are they to teach?
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Verse 4. That they admonish the young women to
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love their husbands, to love their children.
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We'll stop there. It goes on. They admonish.
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Now again, some translations read they teach.
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So the Greek word here is sophronizo. And it
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means to correct. It's to restore someone to
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their senses. You're causing them to think correctly.
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Now think what Paul is saying here. The older
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women were to correct the false assumptions that
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these younger ladies had about domestic life,
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married life. And he specifically says, teach
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them how to love their husbands and love their
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children. So part of thinking correctly is to
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understand that being a loving wife and mother
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is about self -sacrifice, not self -fulfillment.
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Don't get your ideas about marriage from Hollywood.
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The very first command that Paul gives for the
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older ladies to teach the younger ones is how
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to love their husbands. Now that seems strange,
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because if there's anything women are good at,
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it's loving. They love naturally. I mean, aren't
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women the heart of the home? But the command
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here... It's to love, but it's not a romantic
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love. It's not a sexual love. The word is philandros.
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It means to be fond of their husbands. To be
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affectionate toward them. You can see where our
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English word is philanthropy. So you could say
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this. Christian wives are to be philanthropic
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toward their husbands. And you're like, what's
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it mean to be philanthropic? The idea... of seeking
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the welfare of another. Someone's philanthropic,
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they are very generous, usually charitable work.
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It's the idea of seeking the good, the betterment,
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the welfare of another person. So here's what
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he's saying. Wives, young ladies, use your gifts,
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and you are gifted, of time and talent and treasure
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to make life better for your husband. Again,
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I want to quote Davey. I think he just did such
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a good job. I loved reading him this week. He
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said, a younger woman, go to that next slide,
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guys. A younger woman has been married just long
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enough to learn how stubborn and difficult and
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insensitive and hard -headed her husband can
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be. No amens. And she's probably come to the
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wrong conclusion that she married the only man
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God made that way. It takes an older woman to
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come along and say, that's just how they come
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out of the box. God's got to work on your husband
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as he purifies him and makes him zealous for
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good deeds. And by the way, he's doing the same
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work in you. So the older ladies, because sometimes
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we think we're the only people that's ever experienced
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this. So the older ladies can relate to the frustration
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these younger ladies had in a way that a pastor
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never could. I mean, these are not the first
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women to have difficult moments in their marriage.
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To have marital conflict, let me just say this,
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is common to every marriage. And the older ladies
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can help the younger ladies navigate those waters.
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How do they do that? They're correcting misconceptions.
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There's many misconceptions that abound about
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motherhood and also about marriage. And the younger
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ones are still clinging to that. Maybe they've
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been influenced more by culture than Christ.
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So they need to be taught, first of all, and
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this is a hard lesson, but it's true, ladies.
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They need to be taught that love can be learned.
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Your emotions have to be governed by right thinking.
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The younger ladies, their emotions are not always
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reliable, nor are they ultimate. Truth and commitment
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are. Right thinking should come before right
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feeling. What do I mean by that? If you set your
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mind on the truth and you begin to do loving
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things, loving feelings will come. But some of
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these ladies, keep in mind this is pre -Christian
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era or dawn of the century here of the gospel,
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they would have entered into an arranged marriage.
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They didn't have romantic love for their husbands.
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And by the way, the ancient world didn't care
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a whole lot about romantic love or not. So they
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needed to be taught, how are you going to correctly
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love your husbands? And Paul is telling Titus
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that it would help them not to wait for the emotion
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of love to be present before they acted in love.
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The truth is, You can serve your husband even
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when you don't feel like it. Loving actions drive
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the train. Loving feelings are the caboose bringing
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up the rear. Our culture has reversed that. We
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are bombarded with this messaging that says,
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first of all, that the feeling of love is paramount.
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That's what life's all about, particularly romantic,
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marital life. So if you don't feel that spark,
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that romantic love, well, get out of the marriage.
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Life's too short. Find someone else who will
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give you that spark. That's why we need an older
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woman who can correct that type of garbage and
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misunderstanding. God's calling for a Christian
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young lady or older lady is that they live distinctive
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lives and they adorn the doctrine, and this will
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most clearly show up in the home. Again, I think
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of some of these young ladies that Titus would
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have been dealing with. No doubt some of them
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were disillusioned in their marriages. They may
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have thought, well, listen, I'm a Christian and
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I married a Christian, so that should protect
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us from marital challenges, right? No. See, that's
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a misconception. Yeah, you're a Christian, but
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you're still a sinner. Who's also married to
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a sinner. And guess what? Your children, if the
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Lord blesses you with those, they will be sinners.
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Which is why being a mother is the most difficult
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job in the world. And the older believing ladies
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were to help these young ones, not only to love
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their husbands, but Paul goes on, teach them
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to love their children. This seems strange because
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almost all parents have natural affection for
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our children. But that does not mean that we
-
know how to love and guide them well. You can
-
have emotions for them and not really love them.
-
Because to love does not mean to feel. To love
-
your children means you're going to seek their
-
welfare and guide them into truth. Human flourishing,
-
we could say. So the goal of Christian parenting,
-
this ought to be your goal if you're a Christian,
-
is to raise your children to be disciples of
-
Christ. The older ladies teach the younger ones
-
to love their children in such a way that leads
-
them to being faithful to Christ. Because, listen,
-
there's all kinds of mixed messaging out there
-
now. A lot of really dumb ideas about parenting.
-
In other words, older ladies disciple the younger
-
ladies who will then disciple their children.
-
That's what we need. If you're a mom, you have
-
an important, precious job because you have been
-
trusted with the stewardship of your children's
-
souls. God's sovereign over salvation, but he
-
uses means. See, you can love your children and
-
love them in the wrong direction. You can love
-
your children all the way to hell. I mean, you
-
can love them too much where you never tell them
-
no and they never have a bad day and you're there
-
to rescue them every second of every moment of
-
every day. That doesn't turn out well. The goal
-
for most parents, sadly, even Christian ones,
-
is that their children simply be successful.
-
Now, obviously, I want my children to be successful.
-
But by success, they mean we'll get a good education,
-
get a good job, and hopefully have a happy family
-
one day. Christian parenting ought to have different
-
goals. We are to love our children so they are
-
useful in the kingdom of God. Young ladies, had
-
to be taught, don't live by feelings. Because
-
your feelings are going to lead you straight.
-
Live by faith in God's wisdom. See, it's not
-
your feelings. It's her devotion to Christ that
-
causes a Christian wife to be devoted to her
-
husband and her children, even when, and they
-
will be, ungrateful and uncaring. She's not looking
-
only for that reciprocal kickback, if you will.
-
But you say, why would a woman live like this?
-
This is hard. Verse 5, that the word of God be
-
not blasphemed. This is not about us. It's about
-
him. This adorns the gospel. It showcases the
-
beauty and glory of the Lord Jesus Christ, whom
-
we serve. And Paul goes on. He says he doesn't
-
stop there. Not only do they love their husbands,
-
love their children, but they are to be discreet,
-
he says. We'll go through this fairly quick.
-
It's sensible. Christian women should be characterized
-
by sound judgment and good sense. Then he goes
-
on. Chaste. Chaste. Chaste there is pure. Now
-
keep in mind something. Keep in mind the culture
-
that these ladies came from. Pagan culture, Crete.
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Flaunted sexual expression. Heterosexuality was
-
considered prudish. This was an anything goes
-
culture. So most likely these women, if they're
-
first generation Christians, they would have
-
come from homes with mothers who did not teach
-
them how to be pure because that was not desired.
-
So they had to be taught. The importance of being
-
sexually chaste and faithful. So the older ladies,
-
now they've walked with the gospel, they've walked
-
with the Lord. They could help these younger
-
ladies with modesty. Help them to see beyond
-
the cultural lies. Help them to see that their
-
value came from the beauty of their faith and
-
not the beauty of their figure. See, part of
-
being pure, for a lady and for men, but for ladies,
-
is to focus more on how you live than how you
-
look. But our culture doesn't get that. These
-
ladies had been bought by Christ. They had been
-
washed. They had been made pure by the sacrifice
-
of Christ. They had been made new in Christ.
-
But they needed help in living out that identity
-
in their daily lives. Davy said, Paul is effectively
-
saying to these younger women, you may not have
-
had a reputation for being pure. Again, they
-
grew up in this culture. But you can have one
-
now. Purity may never have been associated with
-
your past lifestyle, but that can change in the
-
present. This is the gospel of grace. No matter
-
your past, the word pure can define you now.
-
This is what Jesus does. He makes all things
-
new. And Paul is saying, teach them. Teach them
-
how to be pure. Teach them how to be chaste.
-
But then he goes on, teach them how to be homemakers.
-
That's what the word says, literally keepers
-
at home. Now let's just be honest. This word
-
right here is anathema to our culture. If we
-
were looking at Paul today, he would be called
-
politically incorrect, chauvinistic, misogynistic,
-
a bigot. His advice, or let's be honest, his
-
admonition would seem prehistoric and out of
-
step with progress and advancement of women.
-
So ladies, let me ask you this question because
-
you do have a choice. This word we're going to
-
talk about, you can believe what the culture
-
says, or you can choose to believe what the word
-
of God says. But you can't believe both. See,
-
the word here is oikouros. It means literally
-
keeper at home, homemaker, guardian of the house.
-
Because it's derived from two words. You get
-
the word house or household or family. Oikos
-
and ouros, a watch, a guardian. So the Christian
-
mother is to guard the home. And watch over.
-
Not physically. That's not what we're talking
-
about. And it's not so much about her staying
-
in the home, but about her diligent, watchful
-
management of the home. She's a steward. She
-
stewards the resources that come into the home.
-
She watches over the influences allowed in the
-
home, particularly as it relates to her children.
-
But modern feminists are going to look at this
-
and tell women, well, this is bondage. This is
-
slavery. This is something you need to be freed
-
from rather than embrace. But Paul's not showing
-
a low view of women at all here. He's showing
-
a very high view of the home. God has created
-
women incredibly capable, industrious, endowed
-
them with many gifts. Seriously, my wife is far
-
more gifted than I in almost every way. But when
-
employed correctly in the home, that leads to
-
the family's flourishing. is to work hard at
-
providing an environment in which our husband
-
and children can thrive. Does this mean, what's
-
asked the question, does it mean that she cannot
-
ever hold a job outside the home? Not necessarily.
-
At this time in history, the wife may have helped
-
in the fields or in the vineyards. She may have
-
stewarded or watched over any servants that may
-
have been employed there. The home doesn't have
-
to be your only place. But it does have to be
-
her first place. Her home must be the priority.
-
And Paul is not very ambiguous about this. He
-
says, listen, you have to understand this is
-
where God, this is the influence, ladies. Don't,
-
do not, please, I beg of you, don't outsource
-
your influence to others. You guys have the influence.
-
Take advantage of that. God's given you such
-
a high, noble calling. He goes on saying they
-
need to be good and the word can be translated
-
good is actually kind. This is so important.
-
A wife can do her job well and still make others
-
miserable in the process. A godly lady will try
-
to speak with the law of kindness on her lips.
-
Daniel Doriani in his commentary, he says husbands
-
and children are frustrating. Therefore, these
-
young women must take care that the constant
-
strain of domestic duties does not make them
-
irritable. Or cruel. They must pray for grace
-
to remain kind. We have four children. My wife
-
stays home with them every day. Occasionally
-
I do. And when I do, I usually at the end of
-
the day, I tell her thank you. And I'm like,
-
really? No, I mean that. Thank you. You are so
-
much better than I. Because I think I'm patient.
-
I don't know why I think I am. But I think I
-
am until I spend the entire day with all four
-
of them. And by the end, I'm like, don't talk
-
to me. You forwarded the right to talk to me.
-
And I'm not kidding. I literally have said you
-
cannot ask me any more questions at this point.
-
None. And I don't even care if it's a dire one.
-
I'm not joking. But my wife does that every day.
-
And so I'm surprised she's not in a corner like
-
tapping her head or something like that. So you
-
can see, are you prone to be irritable? Yeah.
-
Are you prone to be naggy? Yeah. So kindness,
-
though, ladies, you're saying, well, I've got
-
to try harder. Well, try that. It's not going
-
to work. Kindness does not come by trying harder.
-
kindness is a fruit of God's spirit. It comes
-
by being filled with the spirit of God. The very
-
last one here, we start to close. This is another
-
big one that people will say amen to. I'm kidding.
-
The last item Paul mentions, he wants older Christian
-
women to teach young ones to be obedient to their
-
own husbands. Obedient. It's a military term.
-
To range in order under. Subordinate. So it's
-
the idea of here placing troops in rank under
-
an officer. That's what it literally says. They're
-
ranking under. I'm choosing to rank under. What's
-
Paul saying? Christian wives are to willingly
-
place themselves under the authority of their
-
husbands. You chose to marry a lady. Don't marry
-
a fool because you're going to place yourself
-
under a fool. You better know who you're marrying.
-
Husbands are not. Listen, husbands. This is one
-
thing I will say. We are not. called to force
-
our wives to submit. This whole hupotasso is
-
a voluntary submission. It can't be forced by
-
you. And by the way, this is not a call for all
-
women to be in subjection to all men because
-
notice the text, obedient to their own husbands.
-
A wife has to submit to her husband, not to you
-
if you're not her husband. The Christian lady
-
voluntarily does this under the protective leadership.
-
Why? To adorn the gospel. For the testimony's
-
sake. See, if society's going to be ordered,
-
everyone submits to someone. A child called to
-
submit to his parents. Student submits to his
-
teacher. Teacher submits to the principal. Employee
-
submits to employer. Congregants submit to their
-
elders. The wife submits to her husband. And
-
let me just say this. Be quick to say this. This
-
submission is not based on the character of the
-
one you're submitting to. For example. You may
-
be more talented, more godly than your husband,
-
but God has still placed him as the head of the
-
home. You're saying, how do I know that? 1 Corinthians
-
11 .3. I want you to know that the head of every
-
man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and
-
the head of Christ is God. The wise husband will
-
understand you can help your wives greatly, men,
-
by giving loving leadership and placing her needs
-
above your own. She's going to have a much easier
-
time submitting to you. Michael Foster wrote
-
this. He said, men should want a wife who follows
-
their lead, but that in no way makes her passive
-
or a non -influence. I don't want my wife to
-
be passive. I want to hear from her. Quite the
-
opposite. A passive and uninvolved wife will
-
undermine the beauty of the marital dance. The
-
magic of marriage is found in the interplay of
-
two individuals who dance according to their
-
sex, their unique roles, but yet they dance together.
-
So what he's saying, the wife's voluntary submission
-
to her husband, it's an act of worship offered
-
to her Lord. So ladies, your service to your
-
husband. Now listen, get this. As a Christian
-
lady, your service to your husband is your service
-
to Christ. It honors him. And marriage, that
-
beautiful romantic dance, it is mutually satisfying
-
when husband and wife both are submitted to the
-
Lord. And both make it their aim to please him.
-
And again, why did Paul command any of this?
-
Verse 5. That the word of God be not blasphemed.
-
This adorns the gospel and glorifies the Lord
-
who bought and rescued us. Now what? Let's close.
-
We read those stats at the beginning and it's
-
easy to get discouraged because we do see families
-
fractured and God's design for the home is mocked.
-
It's rejected. It's ridiculed. We live in a dark
-
culture, but we must remember, you and I are
-
not the first generation of Christians to face
-
these problems. Early Christians lived in a world
-
filled with immorality, broken homes, moral confusion
-
that was even worse than our own. They did. Yet
-
the gospel, the good news of Christ, the dunamis
-
of God, the power of God, the gospel changed
-
the world, not through political influence, by
-
the way, but through transformed lives, one life
-
at a time. The church will change the culture
-
when Christian men and Christian women live differently
-
according to the design that God has placed on
-
your life. The church will change the culture
-
when the marriages in the church look different
-
than the marriages in the world. See, the gospel
-
is transforming, and its transforming power is
-
seen when a husband will lovingly lead, a wife
-
will lovingly submit, and when children are raised
-
in the fear of God. We don't need to make it
-
hard or complicated. Jesus, remember, he died
-
to purify us and make us zealous for good works.
-
He died not only to forgive us, but to transform
-
us. Our ultimate goal in life is not merely to
-
have a happy home. That's far too short -sighted.
-
What's our ultimate goal? To glorify God and
-
enjoy him forever. We don't want the word of
-
God to be blasphemed by our lives. Our aim in
-
everything in life is that Jesus Christ the Son
-
of God who has died and risen for us, might be
-
exalted. As a church, the Lord will work through
-
ordinary Christians like ourselves, living obedient
-
lives in the midst of a very dark and crooked
-
generation. May our homes be a strong witness
-
to the grace and glory of the Lord Jesus Christ.
-
May his name be praised. Let's pray. Father,
-
we thank you for your word, and Lord, I am so
-
very grateful, Lord, for... That you gave us
-
your word so that we're not left in the dark
-
or uninformed about what you would have us to
-
do. Lord, the problem is not ignorance. The problem
-
is rebellion. It's not that we don't know what
-
to do, it's that we don't want to do it. And
-
Father, this is a problem. It's a problem in
-
our modern day as we hear with modern ears, Lord,
-
secular advice that, Lord, God will lead us to
-
hell. Lord, it's a terrible way. And yet, Lord,
-
your word. will always, because it's according
-
to your design, will lead to human flourishing.
-
Lord, I pray that, Lord, we would first of all
-
understand the gospel, how God has rescued us
-
in Christ, not through any effort of our own,
-
but simply by your grace. And Father, that you
-
have given us your spirit, not to simply forgive
-
us and bring us to heaven one day, but to transform
-
us here as sons and daughters of the living God,
-
to shine as children of the light who live in
-
the kingdom of light. Father, I pray if there
-
may be one here who's in darkness, whose faith
-
is merely a profession that James wrote about
-
earlier. Lord, wake them up before it's too late.
-
Lord, cause them to see eternal realities. Let
-
them understand the day of judgment that is coming,
-
Lord. And Father, I pray for Christian ladies
-
in here this morning, Lord. Some of this may
-
be hard to hear because they do live with a foolish
-
husband. Oh God, I pray that you give her courage
-
to be obedient to you, to find her strength in
-
you, Lord. that the law of kindness would be
-
on our lips, and Lord God, by without a word,
-
she might win her foolish husband. And then,
-
Father, I pray for those, Lord, who have marriages
-
that are strong, that, Lord God, that they would
-
continue, not just for their own aim of marital
-
happiness and bliss, but, Lord God, that we would
-
live our lives for the glory and honor of Christ,
-
to adorn your gospel, that, Lord, our lives are
-
living testaments to the transforming power of
-
Christ. God, we can't do this, Lord. We're impotent
-
on our own, Lord. We have no power. So, Father,
-
we're asking, Lord, for your spirit to work in
-
us. Give us grace to live these countercultural
-
lives for the glory of Christ, in whose name
-
we pray. Amen. We're going to come to the table
-
of the Lord. We do this every Lord's Day.