Marriage and Destiny | Pr. Fred Wantante

The Word of God is food for the spirit and health to the body.

Through the spirit of revelation we are guided into the wisdom and deep mysteries in His

Word that make our lives vibrant and productive.

Welcome to the Merciful Gospel Church Podcast.

As you're listening, the glory of God will be quickened and activated in your life.

And now, the Word.

Last month and part of November, I believe, we began a series to look at the circumstances

that surround the birth of Jesus, the events that took place before, during, and after.

And we are gleaming from those events, the narrative, the Word spoken.

We're trying to see nuggets, lessons we can apply in our lives.

And I thought we had finished, but the Lord gave me another message that is connected

to the circumstances and events that took place during the birth of Jesus.

So turn with me with your Bibles please to the Gospel of Luke chapter 1 verse 5 and verse

Luke 1:5

6.

We'll begin by reading those two verses.

Luke chapter 1 verse 5 and verse 6, it says, There was in the days of Herod, the king of

Luke 1:5

Judea, a certain priest named Zacharias of the course of Abia, and his wife was of the

daughters of Aaron.

And her name was Elizabeth, and they were both righteous before God, working in all

the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless.

I want to begin by talking about evangelistic dating and marriage.

Today I want us to discuss the subject of marriage.

I hope we can all apply this message to our lives.

If you're not yet married, it's still applicable.

If you're married, it's applicable.

But I can't help but see lessons we can gain from studying this couple, Elizabeth and her

husband Zacharias.

There are many things we can learn from them.

And first of all, I want to talk about evangelistic dating and marriage.

These people were both believers.

Elizabeth was from the tribe of Aaron.

He was a priest and he married a daughter of Aaron, I think a distant cousin of his.

But they were both Jews, they were both believers.

That's what I want to say.

They were both serving the Lord.

That is the desire for God's people.

The Bible says, don't be unequally hooked with unbelievers.

This is something I have preached about.

And this morning I want to reiterate that God does not allow believers to be married

to unbelievers.

We are not allowed to do what we call evangelistic dating.

You hope that this man, this woman, one day will become a believer.

It's a good man.

You know, he doesn't prevent me from coming to church.

I know he loves God in his own way, but what?

He will get saved.

I want him to become my wife or my husband.

I know he's not a believer, but you know, I'm believing that he will change.

And when I get married, he has promised not to prevent me from coming to church.

He allows me to come to church with the children.

That is what we call evangelistic dating and marriage.

That is not permitted in scripture.

We see Zacchaeus, Elizabeth, they were both believers.

That is God's standard.

If you're a Christian, I'm afraid that is our standard.

We're not allowed to date unbelievers or to be married to unbelievers.

Praise the Lord.

One of the, probably this decision is only second to believing on Christ.

The person you choose to get married to, it is so critical because that decision will

affect your relationship with God, it will affect your health, it will affect your destiny,

it will affect your calling and purpose in God.

This is the second most important decision you can make in this life, who you marry,

because it affects you 360 degrees.

It affects you in every sphere of your life.

I want to show an example in scripture.

But before I go there, I want you to notice that from the times of Esau to King Solomon,

to the times of Ezra, the enemy has had a strategy of weakening the church and destroying

God's purpose.

That strategy is having believers get married to unbelievers.

That strategy has worked for Seta.

It tries to weaken the church by seducing and enticing believers to get married to unbelievers.

It weakens our testimony.

We have children who are confused, should I go with daddy, should I go with mommy, should

I go to the church, should I go to the mosque, which faith should I follow?

My father's religion is a Muslim, my mother's is a Bonnegain.

Where do I go?

You confuse the children.

We can lose a generation.

The enemy has used this tactic for years and it works.

And it's unfortunate that we have not caught on.

We have not caught on on this strategy and many still fall for this trick.

We fall prey to this trick because the enemy does it over and over again.

If Satan has failed to short circuit your ministry, if Satan has failed to destroy you,

he will lead you to marry a wrong spouse, especially an unbeliever.

It works.

It will strong your ministry.

It will affect your testimony.

It will affect your work with God.

This strategy has worked for Satan for centuries.

He has affected the people of God by having believers yoke or get married to unbelievers.

I want to show you in the Bible a good example and that is King Solomon in the book of 1

Kings 11.

1 Kings 11 verse 3, it says, And he had several hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred

1 Kings 11:3

concubines, and his wives turned away his heart.

Solomon backsleed because of marriage.

Friends, no one here is too strong that immune from this attack.

The day you choose to marry an unbeliever, you become vulnerable.

You become one whose heart may be turned away from the Lord over time or it will affect

your effectiveness in executing your call and ministry.

It will affect you spiritually.

This man was a very powerful man.

He was a spiritual man.

God spoke to him.

He had a visitation from God two times.

He was endowed with a powerful gift of wisdom.

He would see revelation and vision.

He was a wise king.

The Bible says the wisest man was ever lived, Solomon, very wise, anointed.

But what causes fall?

Marrying an unbeliever.

That strategy of the enemy works.

I want to let you know if you do it, you are not immune.

You set up yourself to failure.

You may say, Pastor, but I have some friends who got married to an unbeliever and somehow

another man later on became a Christian and they are happily married.

If that is your argument, I have just to say to you, there are people who have attempted

to commit suicide and God intervened and spared their lives.

Does that mean all those who want to commit suicide now should attempt suicide?

Are you following my argument?

If you say, Pastor, some people have got married to an unbeliever and you know somehow things

worked out, it is a risk.

It may or may not work.

You can say someone, Pastor, the other day attempted to commit suicide and he did not

die.

Even me, if I try, I will not die.

Who told you he may succeed?

He may succeed.

It is a strategy the enemy uses and friends, it works.

People change.

There is a way in which their testimony and their ability to influence other people for

Christ declines.

It declines.

Verse 4, 1 Kings chapter 11, verse 4, But was so when Solomon was old, and his wife

1 Kings 11:4

standeth in his heart after other gods, and his heart was not loyal to the Lord his God,

and as was the heart of his father David.

It will affect your relationship with God.

And my friends, whatever affects your relationship with God is dangerous.

Whatever comes between you and God, it is extremely dangerous.

Marrying or getting married to an unbeliever, it will affect your relationship with God.

It says in verse 11, verse 11, verse 11, Therefore the Lord said to Solomon, Because you have

done this, and have not kept my covenant and my statutes, which have commanded you, I will

surely tear the kingdom away from you and give it to your servant.

Nevertheless, I will not do it in your days for the sake of your father David.

I will tear it out of the hand of your son.

Do you know that when you get married to an unbeliever, you are setting up your children

to fail?

I know you do your best, but you put them in a precarious position.

They are in a sleep on the ground.

Your seed will have a battle ahead of them.

And many of those children have issues.

Some struggle, should I follow my mother's faith?

If they follow your faith, they have challenges from their father's side or mother's side.

There's the influence from in-laws, from cousins, from brothers.

They have those meetings where they invite them.

They are not believers.

It is you are setting up your children in a place where there's going to be a lot of

temptation.

God said, I will not tear the kingdom away from you.

But when you have good children, that's when I will begin to deal with you.

Solomon's son became a king, but he had a sentence over his head.

The kingdom was going to collapse.

The kingdom was going to be torn into two because Solomon had married straight wives.

You are doing a disservice to your children when you get married unbelievers.

It's not fair to them.

It affects your entire health.

It affects even your ultimate success in this life.

All right, hallelujah.

Now the second thing I want to see from the example of Zacchaeus and Elizabeth, I've talked

about evangelistic dating and marriage.

I want to talk about God's will and marriage.

When God brought Zacchaeus and Elizabeth together to get married, God was aware that Elizabeth

had a problem to conceive.

God was aware.

But I believe these two people realized this was God's will for them to get married and

to get married.

And I believe God's will has inbuilt shock absorbers.

God's will takes care of unexpected and unpleasant scissors in our lives.

Oh, praise the Lord.

God's will, when you find a spouse in God's will, even though you may face some road bumps,

speed bumps, there may be some hurdles, but because it's God's will, it will be all right.

God's will is supreme.

The number one thing, God's people, if you're still single, the number one question to ask

when you're getting married, is this God's will?

When that question is answered in the affirmative, everything will fall in place in time because

it's God's will.

This woman says in verse, let's turn to that.

Look, look, let me turn to my Bibles also.

My Bible, Luke chapter one, Luke chapter one, I want you to see here, verse 24.

Luke chapter one, verse 24 says, now after those days, his wife Elizabeth conceived and

she hid herself five months saying.

Now first of all, the Bible says they were stricken in age, they were very old.

But because it was God's will for them to get married, even that issue of marriedness

could not prevent God's purpose in their lives.

She conceived and look what she says in verse 25.

Thus the Lord has, there was me in the days when he looked on me to take away my reproach

among the people.

It means people were saying many things about their marriage.

There were people who were insensitive, making nasty comments.

There were many people who are talking behind their back, but because it was God's will

for them to get married, in the end they came out victorious.

Please hear me very well.

If you're still single and someone comes to you and wants to marry you, the number one

thing to check out is not how tall, how handsome they are, how much money they have, how much

education they have.

The key question is, is it God's will?

If it is God's will, everything will fall into place as time goes on.

You'll fall into this.

Barrenness, poverty, cultural problems, tribal differences, whatever challenge you face in

that marriage, if it is God's will, it will be okay.

To be okay, that's for sure.

Now turn to the Book of Ruth.

I want to dig deeper into this point because someone needs to get this in his spirit.

Ruth chapter 3, chapter 3 verse 10 to verse 13.

Ruth 3 · chapter mention

Ruth has come back with Naomi in Israel.

She's now probably about maybe 35, 40 years old.

She has been single.

She got married.

Her husband died, but they had no child.

Probably people thought she was also having a problem conceiving.

She has baggage.

She's taking care of her mother-in-law.

She has extra baggage.

On top of that, she's a foreigner.

She's from the tribe of Moab.

She has all these things against her.

In spite of that, there is a man called Boaz who has looked at her and has gained interest

in her.

Now Ruth comes to him at night and she does what they do in their culture.

He says, you are now my kinsman-redeemer.

Your male relative, my husband, died.

It is now your responsibility to marry me so we can raise a seed in the name of your

dead relative.

In verse 10, he says, and he said, blessed be thou of the Lord my daughter.

There was a big age difference.

For thou has showed more kindness in the latter than at the beginning, inasmuch as thou followest

not young men, whether poor or rich.

Now my daughter, fear not.

I will do to thee all that thou requirest.

For all the seed of my people doth know that thou art a virtuous woman.

And now it is true that I am thy near kinsman, howbeit there is a kinsman nearer than I.

Then you suppose there.

But what is his surprise that a Ruth who is much younger than him is willing to become

his wife.

He says, you have a wide choice of younger men in your country, Moab, and even in Israel.

How many you could choose from.

But he says, you have come to me.

And I believe this young woman Ruth, with the help of her mother-in-law, was being led

by the Holy Spirit, because Ruth was being given an opportunity to join the lineage of

Jesus.

Someone who is coming from outside Israel, being included in the commonwealth of Israel,

being, and even being put in the bloodline of Jesus, that is a lifetime opportunity.

That is what every girl will dream about, being a grandmother of Jesus.

This woman, through revelation, her mother's counseling, her mother-in-law, she decided

to choose or to go with this older man, because she sensed destiny with this man.

And it shows me that in marriage age is important, physical appearance is important, culture

is important, tribe is important, and the question is, all these things are important.

But what is even more important is the will of God, the will of God.

She says it was God's will for her to go with this man.

There were other men, she could even go back to Moab and get married to people who are

closer to her age, people probably more handsome, more good-looking.

But she says this, I say something in this man, I feel God drawing me to this man.

There are differences in tribe and culture and age, but I sense destiny with this man.

It comes back to what I've been saying, that God's will is supreme, supreme over everything

else.

People have made bad choices because they base their choices purely on the physical.

They base their choices purely on the financial prospects.

The best decision on family is coming from, she's coming from this family, and marrying

up as if you need a breeding through marriage.

Some people, that's their goal.

They want to marry into a wealthy, aristocratic, powerful family because it will improve their

image.

But that is not the basis for marriage.

The basis is, is it the will of God?

That is the most important question to ask.

When that answer is in the affirmative, move ahead, move ahead.

Now even Bawah has had to make a decision.

Chapter 4, Ruth chapter 4 verse 3 and 4, Ruth chapter 4 verse 4 says, and he said unto the

Ruth 4:3 Ruth 4:4

kinsman.

Now of course, before I read this, Bawah told Ruth, Ruth, I am honored that you chose me,

but is actually someone closer to your dead husband than me.

There's someone who should take the first opportunity to marry you because he's closer

to your late husband than me.

So I'm going to give him the first opportunity to choose whether he will marry you or not.

So look what happens in verse 4, said unto the kinsman, now me that is come again out

of the country of Moab, sells a parcel of land, which was our brother El-Melech.

And I thought to advertise the saying, buy it before the inhabitants and before the elders

of my people, if thou will redeem it, redeem it, but if thou will not redeem it, then tell

me, and I may know, for there is none to redeem it beside thee, and I am after thee.

And he said, I'll redeem it.

Now let's pause there.

This first kinsman redeemer, the one who's closest to the dead husband of Ruth, at first

he agrees to buy the land because he's going to get property.

You know, in Israel, land will always go back to the original owners at every jubilee.

You only would leave, families would not sell land because land was perpetually owned by

families, but you could buy land back by paying the lease.

So this man was going to pay the lease, the leaseholder, and redeem the land, and it becomes

his.

He had no problem doing that because it would amass his wealth, it would out to his acquisitions

and property.

But then, Boaz told him, before you say yes, there is another catch.

He says in verse five, then said Boaz, what did thou buy the field of the hand of Naomi?

Thou must buy also of Ruth the more purchase the wife of the dead to raise up the name

of the dead upon his heritage.

Ah, now he's told, before you say yes, because you think you're going to get more property,

there is a condition.

There is a widow, and there's an old mother-in-law, and you must put them into consideration.

You must raise up a seed in the name of your dead relative, and the property that you are

acquiring will go back to that young man.

Whichever seed you produce first with this woman will become the heir of the deceased

and will take over the property that you're redeeming.

The man thought, hey, is that the condition?

And moreover, you're bringing a foreigner in the equation.

Why me to marry this woman from Orbite, for obviously she lived with my late relative

for years, she had no children.

Then the man said, verse six, the king of Zuma said, I cannot redeem it for myself,

lest I may my own inheritance.

Redeem thou my right to thyself, for I cannot redeem it, because...

Are you following?

This man looked at the exterior.

He only was going to marriage with a view of becoming wealthy and rich.

I looked at this young woman and saw a widow who had been married for years, had no child,

and she had baggage to take care of an old woman who was her mother-in-law.

No, no, no, you can redeem the land.

Many people make choices based on appearance, financial conditions, culture, tribe, education,

all those things.

And I'm not saying they're not important, but be careful.

That's not the most important question to ask before you get married.

Is it God's will?

This man, this man lost an opportunity in a million lives.

Bible says, when Orbite married, no, not Orbite, when Boaz married Ruth, the moment they came

together she conceived and she gave birth to Orbite.

Orbite became the father of Jesse.

Jesse became the father of David.

Hallelujah.

Jesus is called the son of David.

Don't judge by your eyes.

Don't judge because of lust.

Don't judge because purely you want someone educated.

I know it's important, but before you look at education, is it God's will?

This man could be now, instead of having Boaz, whatever his name was, he would be the one

in the lineage of our Jesus Christ.

There are women who look and appear what they are not.

You look at her, what you see is not what she is.

There's destiny in her.

When that man saw Ruth, he failed to see that God was intending to bring a Gentile in the

lineage to show the world that are most interested in saving Gentiles.

God brought Ruth into the lineage to show that salvation is not just for Jews, even

Gentiles can participate in salvation.

It was in God's program.

So when you are looking for a spouse, be discerning.

Ask God to show you very well what is before you because you may turn down an offer and

miss a lifetime opportunity.

There are girls in this church that turned down applications and I believe some of them

have lived with great because they looked at the young man and said, this one, look,

as years go by, this one becomes somebody.

And I have seen that in my eyes.

What is critical is, is it the will of God?

Hallelujah.

I want to show you something in the Bible that has been on my heart these past few days.

It has blessed me.

In Matthew chapter 13 verse 8, the Bible speaks of the sower going to sow a seed and some

Matthew 13:8

seed fell on the west side, some fell on the rocks, some fell on thorns and the seed that

fell on the roadside was stepped on and bats came and ate it.

The ones that fell on the rock germinated, I did not grow when the sun came up, they

died because they lacked roots and the ones that were sown among thorns were choked by

the thorns.

But then Jesus told us there is a fourth category, the good soil.

The good soil for me is a picture of believers, we are good soil, all of us who have come

to know Christ, our hearts, our feral, when we receive the word of God in our hearts,

it produces fruit.

I am now teaching and preaching, I hope the seed is falling on good ground and will produce

fruit in due time.

So the fourth type of soil is good soil.

However, and this really touched me, all of us will go on to live a life where some of

us produce a hundredfold, some produce sixtyfold, some produce thirtyfold.

Why?

Why?

The Bible says in Matthew 13 verse 8, but others fell into good ground and brought forth

Matthew 13:8

some hundredfold, sixtyfold and thirtyfold.

Why?

If we are all receiving the same seed, the seed is the word of God.

There's no word of God, the word of God for one day, another seed for another seed for

the next day, it's the same seed, then why is it that at the end of the day we produce

different harvests?

Why is it that some produce a hundredfold, others produce sixty, and others fall into

good ground?

I thought about that.

Now, there are many factors that affect farming and crops and harvests, but for me, I want

to zero on one thing.

In this life, marriage affects how much fruit you produce in your life.

As a Christian, all factors being constant, the one important variable that will influence

the production of fruit in your life is marriage.

If all of us come to the same church, eat the same spiritual food, live in the same

country, but why is it that some people have a hundredfold, others sixty, and others thirty?

There may be several reasons, but one of them is marriage.

This question of marriage is so important, it will affect even how much fruit you produce

in your life.

The kind of spouse you have will have an impact on how fruitful you are in this life.

You can see that in the life of Mother Crius and Elizabeth.

And my friends, this is one thing that we are all called to do.

Jesus told us, my Father glorified when you bear much fruit.

We are alive today to bear fruit.

Not just, forgive me, to sleep, have sex, have children, make money, those things, they

are there, but the most important reason why we are alive, we are alive to bear fruit.

This is my Father, John 15 verse 8, my Father glorified that you bear much fruit, so shall

John 15:8

you be my disciples.

Verse 16, you have not chosen me, but I have chosen you and ordained you that you should

go and bring forth fruit and that your fruit should remain.

That was the reason we ask of my Father in my name, he may give it to you.

Being fruitful is the number one thing for us who are alive.

The Bible says in Daniel chapter 2 verse 44, Daniel chapter 2 verse 44, it says, In the

Daniel 2:44 Daniel 2:44

days of this king shall the God of heaven set up a kingdom which shall never be destroyed,

and the kingdom shall not be left to other people, but shall break in pieces and consume

all these kingdoms.

It shall stand forever.

There is a kingdom that God is building in these days, it will cover the whole earth.

The image that Nebuchadnezzar saw, he saw a fourth kingdom that has no end.

These are the days when God is building his kingdom.

He has sent us to preach the gospel of the kingdom.

That is the number one reason why you are alive, God's agenda.

Now, number one agenda, he's building a kingdom.

He said, pray in this matter, the kingdom come, that will be done.

That is what God is about.

When he says, he says, oh no, Kola, oh no, where is him?

Can I employ you?

I am building a kingdom.

I am building a kingdom.

Can I use your talents?

That's the number one mission that God has.

Yes, people talk about prosperity, all these things, you know, those things are good, but

please don't forget, God is busy about building a kingdom.

And that kingdom requires workers.

And you and I must be careful that when we choose to get married, it does not impair

our ability to work in the kingdom.

It should not impair or impede or short-circuit our effectiveness in building God's kingdom.

You know, scripture says, Proverbs 19 verse 14, house and wealth are the inheritance from

Proverbs 19:14

fathers, but a wise, understanding and sensible wife, a gift, a blessing is from the Lord.

I believe that I might be wrong, but this is what I want to submit to you.

I believe that there is a person that God will bring in your life who can help you produce

a hundredfold.

But if you miss God's purpose, get married, and by the grace of God, you can work, produce

three hundredfold, work for you sixty-six-four, it's possible you will not become a total

failure and you will go to heaven.

You will go to heaven.

But I believe there is a particular person that God brings in your life and my life that

when you link up, the person may not be the most likely individual for you to marry.

The person may be like Ruth, a foreigner, a gentile, a widow, but if you link up that

individual, then you have hooked into the possibility of bearing a hundredfold.

However, if, and God help us, if you have made a choice, pick somebody else, and please,

I'm not saying leave your spouse, but if you've made a decision, work, you may be able to

get thirty-fold, sixty-fold, seventy-fold, eighty-fold, but it is almost impossible to

get a hundred with that, that individual God destined for you.

Possible.

Possible.

The Bible says that gift is from the Lord.

You may get wealth, you may get houses, you may get property, all these things you can

get, but that individual whom you link up and you hit a hundredfold must come from God.

That's why God's will is important.

Young people, God's will is important.

Sometimes we push people, but sometimes it's even better to go slow and make sure you are

doing what is in the will of God for you.

Praise the Lord.

Hallelujah.

I want to finish with this.

Being single and marriage, I've talked about evangelistic dating and marriage.

I talked about God's will and marriage.

Later I want to talk about being single and marriage.

In the book of 1 Corinthians chapter 7 verse 7, Paul says, For I would not that all men

1 Corinthians 7:7

were even as I myself, but every man that has his proper gift of God, one after this

manner, another after that.

I believe, brothers and sisters, that being single and being married are both bits.

Paul says, I want, I would want everyone to be like me.

I have a gift to be single because when I'm single, I am able to produce a hundredfold.

But there are individuals who if they are single, cannot produce a hundredfold.

Are you following?

All of them, it's a gift.

Some of us can't be single.

We will have problems.

We will produce no fruit.

There are a few people who are gifted to be single and they hit the mark.

Both are gifts that gives out of his own sovereign will.

We have no choice.

We have no power over that.

And it shows me that none of them is more spiritual than the other.

You know, the Catholics say that the fathers must remain holy, they remain single, they

are celibate, you know, they are higher on higher pedestal because they are married to

Jesus.

Some of them are actually married at night.

They have children and they open up orphanages and put the children there.

They say that we have orphanages, but they are children that have been fathered by priests.

I know that because of the Catholics.

Being celibate doesn't make you more spiritual than someone who is married.

It all comes down to what is God's will.

Are you called to be single?

There are times in our lives when God calls us for a season to be single, a season, so

that you hit a certain mark.

Are you following?

You may not be called to be single all your life, but there comes a time when you have

to be single to do an assignment to reach a level of growth as a believer before you

get married.

That's all in God's power and control.

And I believe some of the best times when we have, especially when we have got young

people in this house, is when they are still single, they are more active.

They have got more time to invest in the work.

They are more engaged.

That is there sometimes for a purpose.

That God may get something out of you before you get engaged with marital affairs.

That's all in God's time.

Hallelujah.

Thank you for listening.

We hope that you have been strengthened with his might and fortified by the word of God.

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Goodbye.