Jacob & Esau: Freedom through Love Not Violence

Well, good morning.

I hope you had a good Sunday last week.

A snowy, icy, rainy, cold Sunday.

We slept in, my point of view, uh amazing, amazing Sunday.

We slept in, we cooked a big breakfast.

My children pretended like there was snow everywhere, and they played outside and went sledding on a snowy, grassy, muddy hill.

Um, came back very muddy.

Um that's what we did.

And it was amazing.

It was great.

So hopefully you had a just a lazy, relaxing, warm Sunday.

And we are back.

If you remember, two weeks ago, we started in the Jacob and Esau story.

We spent two more weeks in this Jacob and Esau story.

If you remember last week, Esau was hurting, he was hungry, he comes in from the fields, Jacob, his brother, just manipulates him out of his birthright.

Uh, real tricky guy, this Jacob.

Esau afterward, of course, is furious.

So furious, right?

Of what he just got swindled out of.

And he's threatened.

He tells, he said he's gonna kill Jacob.

He's gonna kill his brother.

So Jacob takes off.

Jacob is on the run, and he heads to his uncle's place, uncle Laban, in another land.

So he's probably feeling alone.

Jacob at this point, he's on the run, he's feeling alone.

He's left his home, his family, probably afraid.

And he comes to what the scripture says, just an ordinary place.

Just an ordinary place.

Nothing special, just an ordinary place, and he falls asleep.

And here's what we read in Genesis 28, 10 through 13.

Jacob left Beersheba and went toward Haran, and he came to a certain place, and stayed there that night, because the sun had set.

Taking one of the stones of the place, he put it under his head and lay down in that place to sleep.

And he dreamed.

And behold, there was a ladder set up on the earth, and the top of it reached to heaven.

And behold, the angels of God were ascending and descending on it.

And behold, the Lord stood above it and said, I am the Lord, the God of Abraham, your father, and the God of Isaac.

The land on which you lie, I will give to you and to your offspring.

Now here's what's interesting once I kind of dug into this a little bit.

Richard Bacham, in a book called Who is God, he says about this passage, says this ladder is probably more of a staircase.

So these are these mountains built back in this time.

Here's a picture of one.

They're called ziggurats.

This is one today in modern day Iraq.

So these people in Mesotamia, they built these mountains and these staircases to the top of the mountain.

So the people believed that the gods lived at the top.

So you had to build the mountain, you had to build the staircase, you had to climb your way to the top to get yourself to God.

Because the gods dwelled up there, and you had to climb the stairs to find God.

But Jacob falls asleep.

And isn't it interesting how quickly we could just read right over it?

That the angels are descending toward him.

Here's point number one.

Exhausting your heart climbing stairways to God is a waste of your life.

That's an exhausting type of faith, spirituality.

It's not gospel, it's not Christian faith.

Yet, how many times have you felt like you have to climb a mountain to get to God?

Right?

Get your act together, climb the stairwell.

Then you're loved when you get up there somewhere near God.

You ascend yourself, right?

Or you become more passionate.

You just need to be more passionate, whatever that means, or however you're going to measure that.

I don't know.

But you've got to climb that staircase to get to the top, to the whatever level of passion that means for faith.

And then you'll be accepted by God.

But the gospel, from Genesis to Revelation, the gospel story, the good news is God to us.

This image that Jacob has in this dream.

That God is there.

And these angels are ascending and descending.

That God is initiating toward him just this ordinary place, in his condition of being alone, afraid, just swindled at his brother.

And yet God is so active in his life.

Point number two is this God speaks to us in our places of ordinary quiet and pain.

I mean, think about the story.

Isaac's been disappointed.

Esau is furious.

Jacob's afraid on the run.

I mean, these people's lives, his family's been destroyed.

Right?

I mean, some of you know this feeling.

Your family was destroyed.

Or your life was destroyed, right?

It's the feeling of that floor just giving out from underneath you.

And all of a sudden you have nothing to stand on.

Your heart was broken.

Or it will be broken.

Or it's just the feeling, for me, so often, just in like an ordinary week, of just like life is not adding up to what I thought it would be, or the expectations I'm projecting onto.

A few weeks ago I had one of those just really ordinary, discontent Tuesdays, right?

Like you have, I have, we all have them.

He's like, what is this world?

What is my life?

It's not adding up to what I thought it would be.

Just kind of feeling discontent, daydreaming about being a you know a bone fishing guide in the Bahamas, just all playing all that out.

How could that happen?

Pretty sure I can make that happen.

You know, you're just all this, you know, insane stuff.

And I call my mentor who's 71, and he laughs at me, which is always reassuring, you know, when your mentor laughs at you when you tell them how you're feeling.

But it's like an encouraging laugh.

Like, oh, oh, silly child, you know, oh, you're oh silly 42-year-old.

Calm down, calm down.

And he says, Raz, I'm 71.

Every day I do exactly what I want.

And I had one of those days last week.

Wouldn't that just not?

I mean, that in of itself was so nice for me to hear, right?

Like the person that you go, like, well, if I shaped my life after that, if I had that life, you know, that would solve this problem I'm having, but then for that person to say, hey, like I do what I want to do, I just do whatever I want to do.

And still, I had one of those days last week.

And his point was, hey, remember, this is not your final home.

See, what I'm learning is part of the discontentment we feel, and this sort of like ordinary, quiet, but a little painful in this world, part of it is when we feel that discontent, we're just longing for our final home.

Right?

It's not that we have to rearrange our whole lives.

Definitely don't blow up your life.

Part of it is just remember we weren't made for this world.

We're always going to have a level of discontentment in this world because we weren't made for this world.

Our hearts are longing for our final home.

Our hearts are longing for heaven.

For so much of my life, the heaven-hell construct was just means by which to make sure I was behaving as a Christian, and I missed out on the fact so much of what it means for me today that the discontentment I feel, some of that is just that my heart actually longs for this place I get to live in one day.

And so, of course, in this ordinary and quiet and in this pain, much like Jacob, we want to hear from God.

Right?

We want comfort from him in this.

So here's a few thoughts, a few thoughts of what it means to hear from God.

What does that mean?

Heard from God.

What does that mean?

What does that mean when we say that?

Well, number one, God has already spoken to us in Jesus.

Colossians 1, 15 through 29.

And so I'm not going to read all these verses.

You can write them down or you can go back and look them up.

God has already spoken to us in Jesus.

So we know about God and we experience God through the life and the person of Jesus.

If we want to hear from God, a great first step is just learn more about the heart of Christ, and you will be hearing from God.

Number two, the Holy Spirit speaks to our hearts.

We're not going to rule that out.

We're not going to say, oh, that was just Bible people.

No, the Holy Spirit speaks to our hearts today.

John 14, 26, Acts 13.

God has not quit speaking.

The Holy Spirit still speaks to us as believers.

The Holy Spirit convicts and comforts as to remind us what is true from God and about God and true about us.

And so what that means is the Holy Spirit won't lead you to leave your faithful spouse.

Holy Spirit won't do that.

That's not in line with God's heart and God's word.

So the Holy Spirit will always be in line with God's heart and God's word.

The Holy Spirit won't lead you to be judgmental and self-righteous.

Holy Spirit's not doing that.

Holy Spirit won't lead you to be manipulative.

Holy Spirit won't lead you to trash your friend or to hold a grudge.

Not gonna happen.

Holy Spirit won't condemn you.

Holy Spirit won't belittle you.

Now there might be lots of voices in me and in you for all that.

Just ain't the Holy Spirit.

Okay?

The voice of the Spirit is in line with God's word and God's heart.

Number three, pain and quiet are profound places to hear from God.

I mean, we can think about Jacob and this story right here.

Out in the middle of nowhere, traveling, some land, some family hadn't even heard of.

Think about what he just did.

He just swindled his brother.

He's probably feeling some shame out of that.

He used from God.

Pain and quiet are profound places to hear from God.

Psalm 34, 18, Job 36, 15, or just the whole story of Job.

Just write down Job.

2 Corinthians 1, 4.

Oswald Chambers says that suffering burns up a lot of shallowness in a person.

I know we don't like that.

But it's true.

Like usually when you meet an incredibly compassionate, wise person whose priorities and values feel so solid, you start talking to them and you realize, oh, they've been through a little bit.

They've been through some.

In pain, we finally come to the end of all of our great ideas.

You know all your great ideas, how you're gonna solve a problem and get through something.

All those great ideas, these great solutions.

And like most of the time, they don't really work.

They just kind of kick the ball down the field a little bit further.

But we have all these great solutions.

What pain does is pain just finally stops all that.

It just stops all that.

To what actually matters in life.

And oftentimes, like that, in the pain and in the quiet, we hear something.

But we need point number four.

Even God's silence is God speaking.

Psalm 27, 14, Psalm 62, 5, and 6.

Sometimes we're seeking a word, we're seeking a leading, just something, something God, right?

Like the floor fell out, the heart is broken, you need some leading, you're in anguish.

Something.

Come on, you're journaling, you can't journal anymore, you're praying, you're talking to other people, you're going for long walks, you're weeping, nothing.

Right?

Nothing.

You're like, come on, come on, come on.

I remember back when you spoke to me a whole lot, and I'm getting nothing.

Dark night of the soul stuff.

And for me, what I'm learning, taking a very long time to learn, because I'd like to resist this, is nothing is not nothing.

Not with God, nothing is not nothing.

The silence is not empty.

And can I accept, can I accept that even in the lack of leading, that I'm okay?

Can you accept even the lack of a fresh word, a fresh emotional feeling of comfort that we want, and I want for you.

But even in the silence, can you accept that you're okay?

That you're already, point number one, Christ's spoken word for you.

That you're already forever been spoken over in Christ as always loved and always cared for.

See, this is what moves us from needing the next religious experience constantly, constantly, constantly.

That's like climbing a mountain up a staircase.

To faith, mature faith that can weather storms, go through seasons, that gives us hope and confidence that Christ is enough for us, even in circumstances that we don't want.

And they'll pass.

They will pass.

The story moves on.

Genesis 29.

Jacob's almost to Laban's house.

He gets out there.

He's not married, but he's seeing these daughters.

Yes, they're his cousins.

It's ancient culture.

It's weird.

It's weird.

He works seven years to marry Rachel, who's the younger daughter.

Laban tricks him.

He ends up marrying Leah, the older sister.

Laban says, Oh, yeah, no, you marry the older first.

That's the way it works.

Sorry, buddy, you gotta work another seven years for Rachel.

And so then he just doubles down.

He works another seven years.

Guys, I know you like spent two weeks leaving cute little notes on your, you know, your sweetheart's car around campus, and like, you know, you dropped off a little flower somewhere.

You did it for two weeks, two weeks.

Fourteen years.

Fourteen years.

Just back your life up.

14 years ago, where you were at.

That's what Jacob did to marry this Rachel.

And of course it's a mess.

Because polygamy's a mess.

And he married sisters.

And Laban betrayed him for the whole thing to get set up.

And Laban really kind of manipulated his daughters in all this.

So it's all gross, it's messed up.

And then eventually Jacob and Laban, they go sideways, they get in a fight.

Jacob leaves with his people and his animals, all the wealth he had accumulated, which means finally, finally, after maybe around 20 years, he is headed home, which means he is headed back toward Esau, which means he's headed back toward the guy who said, I'm gonna kill you.

So he's afraid.

On the journey back, here's this wrestling match with a man.

We think it's God.

It's a strange story.

Some people think it's literal, some people think it's figurative.

Here's what I think it means.

Jacob's been wrestling his whole life.

He's been wrestling to be somebody, to have a blessing that he didn't deserve.

He's always fighting and struggling with other people to be someone, to have something.

Then we get this story, Genesis 32, 24 and 25.

And Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him until the breaking of the day.

When the man saw that he did not prevail against Jacob, he touched his hip socket.

And Jacob's hip was put out of joint as he wrestled with it.

That's weird.

It's one of those weird Bible stories.

I'll read it to my kids and I don't want to explain it, right?

So God allowed Jacob to win, but he touches the hip to say, who's really in power here?

So much of our life is kind of like that, isn't it?

And something comes over Jacob in this moment.

It's like he finally realizes he's really in power or something.

He won't let go of the man.

He says, I will not let go of you unless you bless me.

So now all of a sudden, only this blessing matters from this man, who we think is God.

And Jacob's just left begging.

He has no other way to get it.

He can't manipulate it out of the guy.

He just has to beg.

He's needy.

And then the man blesses him.

Now comes Esau.

Seth read the passage.

Esau's coming toward Jacob with 400 men.

Jacob sends out some messengers to scout out.

What's the story?

How many?

What's going on?

He also wants Esau to know, like, hey, brother, I got a lot of money.

I got a lot of wealth.

I can, you know, I can help you out here.

You know, it's kind of like wink, wink, bribe, bribe, don't, don't kill me.

Don't kill me.

I got some livestock for you.

Don't kill me.

One last-stitch effort to hold off Esau.

Jacob sends out just lavish gifts of livestock.

Just complete bribery.

There's no apology.

We don't see an apology.

It's just bribery from Jacob.

And so, in a way, Jacob is incredibly wealthy, but he's incredibly poor.

He has no idea the currency of grace or forgiveness or the humility to apologize for something he did 20 years ago.

And we also just learned something new about Esau, because we haven't seen Esau for a little bit in the story.

Esau just pops back up.

And we leave Esau, we're like the guy just got swindled out of his birthright, we're not questioned.

But Esau's been living in his homeland, and apparently Esau's become quite a wealthy guy himself.

But he just has 400 men.

So Esau's doing alright.

But we can't forget.

Esau said he was going to kill Jacob.

And their dad said, the dad said, Esau, you will break free from Jacob's yoke over you by the sword.

So what will happen?

Point number three.

With God, turnarounds in life and heart are possible.

With God, turnarounds and heart are possible.

We love a God, we love a good turnaround, don't we?

Here's my favorite turnaround.

See what's my favorite turnaround?

This is my favorite turnaround, is this image right here.

I watched Karate Kid 150 times.

I mean, what skinny kid in the 1980s didn't watch karate kid this way because you thought, maybe, maybe this could be me.

Maybe I could have this sort of turnaround as a severely skinny kid in the 80s.

And if you remember the story, that dirty cobra Kai, right?

Daniel's running through their guys, gets to the finals, and they sweep the leg.

Remember?

Sweep the leg?

Take him out.

Take that knee out.

And he's back in the locker room.

He's like, I can't go anymore.

Mr.

Miyagi's there.

And you remember Mr.

Miyagi?

He does the karate magic.

Remember that?

You need to re-watch it, guys.

Come on.

Back in the locker room.

He does.

Daniel's like, hey, can you do the can you do that um thing where you, you know, you where you and he's like, okay, I will.

You know, the music builds, and he does like this, and he does his hands real fast.

Apparently that's part of it.

Gets it real fast and gets him real warm, I guess, and he heals, gets the knee, heals the knee up.

Just like that.

Karate magic.

Turn around.

Turn around.

Daniel goes out there, does the crane.

It's awesome.

Turn around.

Right?

Daniel is headed one way, just like that, turns around.

We love it.

That's why we love it.

We were, my family was at the Marietta High School basketball game Friday night.

They're whooping North Paulding.

Marietta's got a team.

There's some players.

They're whooping North Paulding, making them look bad.

Just, ugh.

And then like five minutes ago, North Paulding makes a little run, takes it from 20 points down to five points.

Now I'm Marietta.

I'm rooting Marietta.

My kids go to Marietta.

I find myself rooting for North Paulding.

Maybe this could happen.

Like, and I'm like, no, no, no, no.

You're supposed to root for Marietta.

I'm like, yeah, inside, inside, this is going on.

I'm like, you're supposed to root for Marietta.

But I'm like, yeah, but they they were 20 points down.

What five minutes ago?

This like they could do this.

They could turn this.

Like, no, don't let him, you know.

It's like, yeah, because we love a good turnaround, don't we?

We love it.

Some of you are waiting for Britney Spears to have a new album.

You'll be like, she did it.

She really, she really did it.

You know, if it happened, you'd be just like, everybody talked about it.

We'd love a turn, we love a turnaround.

Love it.

And maybe you've had a turnaround, like a personal turnaround.

Tragedy happened, trauma happened, mistakes happened, shame, guilt.

And there was a turnaround.

God's activity in your life, grace toward you.

And you can look back.

You can look back on that.

And you can be so grateful, can't you?

Just so grateful.

We just can't forget.

As a church, we can't forget that this kind of turnaround.

Happen.

Deliverance happens.

People are addicted, and then something happens.

And I'm open to that.

Like I'm open to if this is a process of counseling the Holy Spirit uses, I'm open to something happens in the middle of worship, the Holy Spirit breaks a bondage, or they're walking forward toward communion, and something happens that never happened before.

It can be any of that.

We don't have to box it into just like a religious experience in one moment, or it's only counseling.

It can be all of this, but we have to be open as a church that this type of turnaround in a person's heart and life for ourselves, our friend or family member, that this happened.

This can happen.

So when we left Esau, Genesis 27, this guy's hurting and he's angry.

He's going to kill his brother.

And then when we pick up in Genesis 32, he shows back up and we learn this guy's had quite a turnaround.

Not only is he wealthy, but his heart and his character have changed.

But Jacob doesn't know that yet.

So Jacob divides his camp, right?

So he figures if I divide my people and my wealth and my livestock, these 400 men of Esau's, if they come and wipe out half of it, at least I still have half.

Genesis 33, verse 4.

Genesis 33:4

But Esau ran to meet him and embraced him and fell on his neck and kissed him, and they wept.

And when Esau lifted up his eyes and saw the women and children, he said, Who are these with you?

Jacob said, The children whom God has graciously given your servant.

Then the servant drew near, they and their children, and bowed down.

Leah likewise and her children drew near and bowed down, and last Joseph and Rachel drew near, they bowed down.

Esau said, What do you mean by all this company that I met?

Jacob answered to find favor in the sight of my Lord.

But Esau said, I have enough, my brother.

Keep what you have for yourself.

Jacob said, No, please, if I have found favor in your sight, then accept my present from my hand, for I have seen your face, which is like seeing the face of God, and you have accepted me.

Please accept my blessing that is brought to you, because God has dealt graciously with me, and because I have enough.

Thus he urged him and he took it.

Point number four slavery is broken by love, not the sword.

Remember the father's statement?

The dad was wrong.

He said, You're gonna break the yoke with the sword.

But Esau falls on his brother's neck.

He said he was gonna kill him.

He falls on his brother's neck and embraces him, kisses him, they weep.

Love, not violence, love, not revenge, love not resentment, love not bitterness.

Love breaks the slavery in us and in relationships.

See, forgiveness is the secret power of the world.

We just forget.

And Esau just pours out the grace of unconditional acceptance, which creates restoration.

And in response, Jacob is overwhelmed with gratitude.

Some of you are working through difficult relationships.

Or you will.

I don't know the details.

Some of you will always have to have boundaries in these relationships.

There are people in my life and in our lives we will always have boundaries with.

That will never change.

But I know this unconditional acceptance of the other will be the only way toward freedom and healing for everybody involved.

You can't be free, and the relationship can't be restored if you believe they still owe you.

What a beautiful picture Esau gives us.

This brother that swindled him out of it.

I mean, think how he could have 20 years of resentment built up.

But something's changed in Esau.

And when Jacob comes home, Esau runs to him and embraces him and kisses him and falls on him and weeps over him.

And church, we're like Jacob in this story, showing up undeserving to God, often trying to buy him off, usually without a contrite heart, sometimes with a contrite heart.

And God, like Esau, and like the prodigal story God.

Remember, prodigal son returns, God comes off the porch, runs toward him, embraces him.

Same imagery.

It's gospel imagery, is what it is.

That we are wrapped up before we get a way to earn our way in, before we begin to try to climb another staircase.

See, God came toward us.

That's what the gospel is.

God coming toward us while we're still sinners.

Christ died for us.

All of our sin is put upon him on the cross and his righteousness given to us.

He came down the staircase to us.

We do not have to continue to climb the staircase to him.

Love, not the sword.

Love, not violence, love, not bitterness or revenge.

Love, not merit, is the way restoration occurs.

And that is the gospel.

Let's pray together.

Thank you, God, for this good news that relieves us, rescues us, and even calls us, creates in us humility and gratitude.

May our hearts be overwhelmed with the way that you love and you welcome us and accept us and that Christ is enough for us.

So many of us in this room this morning have been trying to climb staircases to get to you with just the good news of the gospel of unconditional acceptance, full welcome, full acceptance, be true, where they know it in Christ.

So many of us are waiting on a word from you.

And I pray that people would hear it.

Many of us have a difficult relationship.

Would you give us wisdom for boundaries?

And would you give us a heart so secure in you that we can let go of the sword and we can live in love toward others?

We pray this in Jesus' name.

Amen.