Reclaim Conversations That Bring About Change | Clayton Hentzel

Chris Brown was on staff at our church and when he was here, he

made this statement, conflict is inevitable.

Drama. Is a choice.

Conflict is inevitable. Drama is a choice for the last.

Several weeks at many of our locations.

We have had an escape room that you could go and interact with.

And while it was a great opportunity for friends and

family to make memories, we as a church, had more Sinister

motives. It was designed to inflict

conflict into the relationships of those.

You cherish the most and some of you are going Clayton, we don't

need an escape room to get conflict.

We have plenty of conflict in our house.

In fact, if conflict were stock, we would be the buffets Jennifer

and I, we were early in our marriage and I was not prepared

for the amount of conflict My parents were good, godly people

who never raised their voices. Never yelled.

I've never heard my parents have an argument and so I thought,

That that is how normal Christian marriages operate.

And then I found myself in my marriage.

And it did not operate like that and I spent depending on who you

ask, how long it was three to five years, trying to figure

out, which way was up inside of our marriage.

Now, hear me. We both love Jesus.

We were both good Christian people, we both loved and cared

for each other deeply. But there was an awful lot of

conflict and it robbed us of days.

And nights that could have been very joyous.

Today, we are going to talk about conflict.

Why it exists and how to handle it and how to become more Godly

through it at a crazy question. What if conflict I can make you

more like Jesus. I want to welcome all of you

joining from all of our different locations.

Those of you watching online and inside I am.

So thankful that we get the opportunity to hang out and

spend time together today and I just got one big goal in mind.

Is that the end of the day, whether this is your first time

here at our church, for the first time, in a long time,

whether you've been following Jesus, your whole life.

For this is your first time hearing about Jesus that every

single one of us. By the end of today, we would

just take one step closer in an intimate personal relationship

with Jesus Christ. Now, before I get into, To the

message. I want to make you aware of two,

great things that are happening at our church.

First one is Camp, sign-ups are underway right now.

We are already 50% ahead of where we were last year.

So if you're the kind of person who wants to prioritize the

spiritual development of your kids, I want to encourage you to

sign them up soon. And there are some of you who

you're like Jennifer and I you want to be in the corner of

those who would like to go to camp but financially do too.

Circumstances. That might be a little bit of a

big leap for them. I want, you know, you can take

advantage of the QR code on the seat in front of you, to not

only sign your kid up for camp, but if you want to be in their

corner, you can help scholarships some other kids and

provide funds for scholarships so that other people can go to

Camp second thing next weekend all over the world.

People are going to be celebrating a resurrected Jesus

on Easter weekend and we will be doing that at all of our

locations. Make sure you are paying close

attention to to the service times at your specific location

because it many of our locations.

They're going to have different service times to accommodate all

the people that God is gonna be bringing into our different

locations. And we will be using that

weekend to start a brand new sermon series called if.

And the whole reason for this sermon series is twofold, we

want to strengthen the faith of those who have it.

And we want to answer the questions of those who want to

start one. And we're going to be taking a

You'll hard. Look at Christianity, at the

claims of Jesus and sing what the implications are for your

life. And for mine, I'm telling you

that because there is not a better time to bring a friend, a

family member, A co-worker to our church, than the next seven

weeks. So, if you love Jesus, and you

want people to know Jesus, take advantage of that.

So you can be thinking who's one person that you could be

bringing with you next week. The second thing you could do is

if you're on Mission with us to help people.

Find an intimate personal relationship with Jesus Christ.

If you're on Mission and making this, the hardest place on

planet Earth to get to Hell from, if you want to be in the

corner of those who are trying to find their faith, I'm going

to encourage you next weekend to do two, besides bring a friend.

I'm asking you to do to other things Park far away and show up

early because of all the people who, you know, already love

Jesus are, you know, taking all the key parking spots.

Then a person, when he shows up, who's trying to figure out,

Jesus is like, okay. So I guess I, you know, Park in

the grass. So, just be a Jesus follower

next weekend, would you do? Okay, so why this conflict

exists only give you five reasons, why conflict exists?

And it's not because the person you're married to stinks.

Okay. Here's five reasons.

Why conflict exists? The first one is because we're

all Sinners. Every single one of us were a

little jacked up all of us. Have fallen short, and continue

to fall short of the Perfection that God intended for us.

That means that at some point in time, in the distant future, it

probably hasn't happened yet. You're going to be a little

prideful. A little selfish, a little lazy,

maybe you'll lie a little bit, maybe you'll struggle with Envy.

All of us are going to continue to sin and have to navigate the

effects of not just our sinful Behavior.

But the people we care about, they're going to send.

And when you're dealing with sand or they're dealing with sin

that creates conflict, second reason is because every

relationship you have has an enemy Every relationship you

guys have heard me talk about this non-stop.

Satan wants to steal kill and destroy the relationships.

That matter the most to you. The relationship that God wants

to use to bless you and for you to be a blessing to them, I'm

going to keep hammering this verse, John 10:10.

John 10:10

You guys are going to have this memorized or being a great

tattoo. Okay?

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy.

This is Jesus talking Jesus. I have come that they may have

life. And have it to the full.

So you and I, we have a choice. We can follow Jesus plan for our

relationships or we can follow Satan's plan.

There's not a middle ground, not following Jesus.

Plan is following Satan's plan and Satan's.

Desire is to take that marriage, steal kill and destroy it.

Take that relationship with your kid, steal kill, and destroy it.

Take that relationship with your boss, your coworker steal kill

and destroy, but Jesus going, hey guys, just so, you know,

hey, over here over here. There's life and life to the

full. Now, if you follow the Holy

Spirit, he's going to continue to conform you into

christlikeness. He's going to make you better at

relationships. The third reason that conflict

exists is because God made us all different.

Between you and me, that wasn't the smartest thing for God to

do. Because and I mean, this, I want

to say this carefully, I wish he had made you more like me.

Do you know how great that would be?

If you were all like me there be way less conflict.

We be high-fiving ourselves over our decisions all the time.

think about think about this, how many of you deep down

inside, you actually kind of wish that more people were made

just like, You the problem is in your relationships.

She wishes you were more like her and he wishes you were more

like him. And that creates conflict.

Imagine how incredible the world would be tomorrow.

If all of you thought like me the election, there wouldn't

even be an election, you know, you also know.

Me. I humbly submit my candidacy for

president of the United States of America.

And because you now think, like, me, I am indeed the candidate

because I would vote for me, okay?

That's how it would happen when you get in the car and you want

to go grab something to eat. No conflict, because everybody

already wants to eat what you want to eat.

Think about how incredible the world of being.

At the same time, I need you to realize how horrible the world

would be. Because I mean, you know you

right? if everybody was just like you,

Think of all the things that would be absent in our world.

He made each and every single one of us uniquely we have

different perspectives, different priorities, different

approaches and the challenges are and how we navigate the

challenges and opportunities that life presents.

We see things and approach things differently and this is a

good thing. None of us can be the full

expression of God on our own. We need the body of Christ,

which is one another, to bring a fuller expression of Jesus to

Bear to a NG world. And the people we care about

Paul in different parts of the Bible goes over and over at

length, trying to get people to acknowledge.

Which is at least recognize that we're different and appreciate,

which is I'm thankful for how we're made different.

The gifts that God has placed inside of his people, some

people are more prone to be faithful.

Risk-takers other people are, you know, more gifted at

prioritizing stewardship, some people are more gifted at grace

and mercy, other people are better at telling the truth or

maybe at leadership. Some are better at teaching,

some might be better at encouraging.

Ying. He brings all of these gifts to

bear inside of his people. And while these are gifts from

God to be used by God to reach people, for God, since they are

gifts from God, we kind of like them.

I got this gift from God and you need to love it.

Because we're passionate about what God has placed in us

because we got it from him but God does not want one gift to

dominate. But for all of us to bring the

gifts that he has placed in us to Bear, to make all of us

better and to love people better.

The fourth reason. Is because that there's

conflict, is because some people are yielded to God, and some

people are not yielded to God. And so if you have two people in

a relationship that one prioritizes God.

And one doesn't prioritize God, that creates conflict.

That's why he says, when you get married, don't become unequally

yoked. You shouldn't have a couple get

together. We're one loves Jesus and one

doesn't because that's going to create all kinds of conflict

inside of that relationship. If one person is serving God and

the other one is just serving themselves, there's going to be

conflict, but the fifth reason, Ian and this one's probably the

one that affects this the most is, every single one of us we

have expectations You have expectations of your husband,

you have expectations of your wife, you have expectations of

your kids. You have expectations of your

parents. We all have expectations and we

about how we want to be treated, how we want to be cared for how

we want to be spoken to. We have all of these

expectations. Not only is this true in the

workplace. This is true in your home.

This isn't true and this is true in every year of your life.

However, one of the gifts, That God did not give anybody is the

ability to read people's minds. Which means we have all of these

expectations. And if they are not accurately

communicated, it creates conflict.

Let me show you. Husband works hard all week,

long looks on the family calendar and sees nothing on the

calendar for Saturday. So, on his way home from work,

he goes calls up. The fellows says, hey guys, I

got nothing going on tomorrow. What do you want to do?

It's like, let's get up and go fishing.

I love that. I'll be at your house at 6:30

a.m. and so he gets up early on Saturday and he goes fishing.

Meanwhile, his wife was also driving home from work on Friday

after working a long week and she looked up family, calendar.

And she goes. There's nothing for us to do

tomorrow, we can wake up and we can clean the house and we can

do some of those projects that we've been wanting to get done

around here for a really long time.

And then we'll just sit by each other on the couch and hold

hands. Like we used to And she wakes up

at 9:30 on Saturday, because she can sleep in, she doesn't have

to take anybody anywhere. And she rolls over to just kind

of put her hand on his hand, and there's nothing there.

And so she calls him. Thinking maybe he's gone to get

her a coffee, right? Hey sweetie.

Where are you? I'm fishing with the fellas.

Woo. Some of you like actually

careful Clayton. Um it was a nice day the other

day. Then he comes home and she

decided she was just going to go ahead and get all the projects

done and get all the cleaning done.

So he comes home from a long day of fishing.

And he sees that the house is all clean.

Kids are all hanging out at other peoples houses.

He starts to get some expectations too.

He goes. Hey how are you doing fine?

Okay. All right.

Do you need some ibuprofen? No.

Why? Why?

Didn't know if you had a headache?

No I don't have a headache. His expectations are

skyrocketing and then he comes into the bedroom at about 9:30

at night and sees it. She's got sweatpants on to

hoodies and is already asleep and then he is frustrated

because he too had expectations But since nobody communicated

those expectations conflict resentment, frustration are

growing inside of their marriage.

So how does a Christian navigate the inevitable challenge of

conflict and avoid the hurt and drama that destroys so many

relationships? Now I'm going to focus primarily

on marriage and parenting relationships with the

principles were going to talk about apply to every

relationship you have. Look at Galatians, chapter 6,

Galatians 6 · chapter mention

brothers and sisters. If someone is caught in sin, you

who live by the spirit. Those of you who are following

after Jesus, the the pathway to a full and Abundant Life, should

restore that person gently this is conflict.

You should enter into this, but you should do it.

Gently, but watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted, which

means that as you get ready to enter into this conflict, you

could sin while trying to point out the sin of somebody else.

Carry each other's burdens have a little bit of Grace for him.

And in this way, you will fulfill the law of Christ.

If anyone thinks they are something, when they are not,

they deceive themselves. Have you ever noticed sometimes

when you're in Conflict, one of you likes to paint yourself as

mr. Perfect.

Or Miss Perfect. Well, I would never do that.

You did it yesterday, okay? Keep going each one should test

their own actions, then they can take pride in themselves without

comparing themselves to someone else.

For each one should carry their own load.

We're going to stay here for just a second.

Without comparing themselves to someone else.

Here's what we do. Sometimes in Conflict, someone's

approaching you about the things that you do.

You yell a lot. Well I don't yell nearly as much

as my dad. Did you want to hear yelling?

You should have been raised when I was raised.

And you you you you're mean and hurtful you think I'm mean and

hurtful we all know what Bob did just down the street you know

crazy Bob you hear him yelling with the screen doors up?

We you know what it's like crazy Bob.

I'm not crazy Bob What we like to do.

Is we like to compare ourselves to somebody else?

Who stinks to give ourselves permission slips to just stink

less. And he say no no no Jesus

followers. You are always going to find

somebody that will give you a permission slip.

You're always going to find somebody who's messing it up,

but that's not we're supposed to do.

We're not supposed to compare ourselves to someone else and

look at my own motives. Am I operating the way I'm

supposed to operate? And my being the husband, I'm

supposed to be in my, the wife, I'm supposed to be my the

parent. I'm supposed to be my, the child

that I'm supposed to be what my mean, I don't sneak out as often

as the other kids in my class. No, no, no, no, no.

There's a higher standard here. Okay, let's keep going.

Nevertheless, the one who receives In the word should

share. All good things with their

instructor, do not be deceived. God cannot be.

Mocked a man reaps. What?

He sews. Let's keep going.

Whoever sows to please their flesh.

From the flesh. Will reap destruction?

I wonder how many of us when we are going into conflict?

We are motivated by our flesh. And then we are wondering why we

are reaping such a horrible Harvest.

Whoever sows to please the spirit.

I am entering into this conflict for the glory of God.

From the spirit will reap eternal life.

Let's keep going. Let us not become weary in doing

good for at the proper time. We will reap a harvest.

If we do not give up verse 10. Therefore, as we have the

opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially those who

belong to the family of Believers, the first thing you,

and I need to do is we need to change our perspective, and

here's the perspective shift that needs to take place.

Most of us are not dealing with evil rotten despicable people.

People, but that's how we treat them in Conflict.

We step into conflict with so much angst, so much rage because

they are an evil person. How could you?

We assume that they are out to hurt us.

We assume that they are doing this on purpose and then we

react instead of responding a phrase that we use around our

church. A lot is stepping on air hoses.

If you're, you know, Jennifer was breathing through an oxygen

mask, and I were to step on her air hose and she can't breathe.

She's going to react. She's gonna go, you've got to

stop because what would you do if you couldn't breathe?

But what the assumption is, is that I'm over here, cutting off

our Air, Supply choke woman choked.

That's not, I'm just got big feet.

I didn't even know I was stepping on the, I'm sorry.

We give each other a little bit of Grace to realize that this

person is not necessarily out for with evil intentions, but

send just happens here me every, single one of us we have blind

spots. And conflict is a way for people

to point out things in us that we don't see in ourselves.

In other words, if somebody hasn't addressed something in

your life recently, nobody in your life cares, enough about

you to help you get better. Or they care deeply about you

but they didn't know that they can't enter into the

conversation because of how you will respond.

Having people, engaging conflict with us, gives us an opportunity

to see ourselves more clearly to have a fuller understanding of

how we are actually. Treating other people conflict

is not just a chance for us to get better.

It's also a chance for us to help others get better.

Otherwise they will continue to keep doing this.

We will end up enabling their behavior.

They are doing this in, it hurts you well you know that they're

doing this and it's hurting all kinds of other people but nobody

wants to step on their grenade. Nobody wants to set them off and

so they keep causing harm in all of the relationships that they

enter into this could also cause their light for Jesus Christ, to

be diminished and hurt their ability to reach the very people

that Jesus died for Mark, chapter 12 gives us this the

Mark 12 · chapter mention

second And greatest commandment. This is Jesus talking first

greatest commandment love. The Lord your God with all your

heart mind. Soul, and strength.

The second greatest commandment is equally important.

Love your neighbor as yourself. No other commandment is greater

than these. We were out of Staff training

and we were talking to the staff here at the Crossing.

And here's what we noticed, everybody has an expectation

that people would come to them if they were doing something

wrong. Right, you've heard about this.

You found out secondhand that somebody was frustrated with

you. And what's your first response?

Well, I wish they would have come to me.

I wish they would have. Why didn't they just come to me?

But in reality, you know, stuff that other people are doing

Non-Stop and you don't ever go to them.

So, we have a standard for other people that they should come to

us if they have a problem but we don't keep that same standard

High when we have the opportunity to go to someone

else. Most of our struggles I would

say come down to this. We failed to treat people the

way we would actually like to be treated.

We need to change our perspective.

The second thing we need to do is we need to change our motives

when you enter into conflict. If it is not to put them on the

defensive, it is not to get even and it's certainly not to put

them in their place. Conflict is a way for us to help

them get better and to help us get better this change in

motivation, takes so much heat out of the conversation and so

much heat out of the conflict because it puts you in a place

mentally, emotionally and spiritually where we are trying

to to help them be. The person that we believe that

they want to be. Let me say to you this way when

you enter into conflict and you are the person being confronted.

They're pointing stuff out in you.

This is what this is what you're doing, they are helping me be a

better husband. They're helping me be a better

wife. They're helping me be a better

parent. They're helping me be a better

child. They are having this conflict

because they want to help me be who I want to be.

If you're the person having the conversation, I'm having this

conversation because I know they want to be a better husband and

they might not realize what this is costing them.

I'm entering into this conversation because I believe

that they want to be a good wife.

They want to be a good parent. They want to be a good child,

and they need someone to come alongside of them and help them

navigate it. When we change our motives and

we change our perspective, it will force us to change our

strategy and we need a better strategy.

Look what Ephesians chapter 4 says, do not let any unwholesome

Ephesians 4 · chapter mention

talk come out of your mouths. I'm going to view your

confrontation. Your conflict has unwholesome

talk? how many of your confrontations

are but only what is helpful for building others up according to

their needs that it may benefit those who listen And do not

grieve the holy spirit of God with whom you were sealed for

the day of redemption. Get rid of all, bitterness rage

and anger brawling, and slander along with every form of malice.

Let's stay right there for a second.

Let's go back. This is like the checklist of

all the stuff we typically do wrong in Conflict, right?

We show up bitter. We're Pretty stinking ticked,

we're crazy angry. If you were a dude, we'd be

fighting right now. This is how we operate.

Let's keep going. Here's what we're supposed to

do, be kind and compassionate to one another Forgiving each

other. Just as in Christ, God forgave

you I think it's safe to say. We could all use a better

strategy. Some of you you guys are people

who like to sit and stew on it and so you don't bring it up

four months, some of you don't sit on it, are you sit on it for

years and then all of a sudden you're signing papers use.

Blow up your soul, just eroded and all of a sudden out of

nowhere. You're going.

I'm done some of you your the passive-aggressive people.

You're just going to keep making little comments and saying I'm

fine. I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine but

everybody, absolutely. Everybody knows that you are not

fine and so you don't ever clearly communicate what it is.

That's frustrating. You and so everybody else is

stuck in this fog of what you're trying to communicate and so

they can't bring about the change that they actually want

to bring about because you won't actually say what's bothering

you and so the problem persists which continues to erode your

heart. Here's another one we have in

our Earthly relationships. They have an impact, on our

spiritual relationship with God. And so, when you continue to be

passive aggressive, you are making it hard for them to have

a right relationship with you, which makes it in turn hard for

them. And you to have a right

relationship with God, you are robbing them of The Godly

Ministry of reconciliation by, not speaking, clearly about how

they're frustrating. You, you can't get that

relationship, right? Some of you, you are always

addressing it. It.

And the Biblical word for that is nag.

Like we need a break. Okay.

Not every day is like 15 things that you need to confront us on.

You need to have a little bit of Grace or some of you, you choose

to punish people through silent treatment or yelling and

overreacting so that nobody will ever confront you again, this

results in confusion Rising frustration and resentment.

If somebody hasn't confronted something in you, recently, you

already know you've sinned, you already know you let people down

but if they haven't addressed something recently in your life

chances are it's because they are either struggling with a sin

as it pertains to comfort station.

Or there's something about you that has made them feel like

they can't confront you and if they feel like they can't

confront you, you will keep doing the behavior that hurts.

The people you care about the most.

Psalm 34 says, this turn from Evil and do good seek peace and

pursue it there is a better way. Clear consistent communication,

I'm going to tell you what Jennifer and I use Jennifer and

I use the two for one method. Here's the question.

What are two things I'm doing really?

Well, that you want me to keep doing?

I need compliments. I need to know.

Hey that's a goal that I can stalk.

I'm doing this great, I'm doing this great.

And then I asked what is one thing that I need to do better

or what is one thing I need to stop doing?

And if you can use the word feel when you do this it makes me

feel. So I'm going to ask Jennifer to

come up here on stage and we're going to show you what this

looks like. Okay, here are the ground rules.

I said you can't do the same one you did on Thursday.

And you can't be incredibly mean-spirited, but you need to

be radically honest. Because, I mean, how many of you

guys want to air your dirty laundry in front of 10,000 of

your closest friends? So Jennifer?

What are two things that I am doing?

Well that you would like me to keep doing?

Okay, one thing is, you respect my desire for an orderly house

and you will pitch in and be helpful to make that a reality.

I appreciate that. I can keep doing that.

Thank you for sharing. Okay.

What's another thing that I'm awesome at?

I mean that you want me to keep sorry.

Sorry I said that wrong. What's another thing you'd like

me to you'd like me? Yeah, you do a great job of

involving our boys and things and teaching them things that

will help them be good husband. Ins and good Fathers like, how

to detail a car, how to grill a steak, how to clean a bathroom?

So you do a great job of training them up.

I appreciate that, guys. Would you like those good?

We will have to do last done. Okay.

All right. We're not done.

Okay. Jennifer, what is one thing that

I'm doing that? You'd like me to stop doing or

something that I'm doing that is hurting.

So you you might be the most impatient person, I know.

And sometimes there's no good reason for it.

Like, I don't know why were rushing through this but we are

and in those moments, you will brush past what could be

Precious Moments with your kids or just an enjoyable time as a

family because to be honest with you, it frustrates the heck out

of me when you didn't, let's go, let's go, let's go.

Where are we going? We don't have anywhere to go and

your boys will, well, you just miss out on things that they

want to share or things that you could just see them doing

because we got to rush through her IV to get know.

No. We're okay.

What I'm hearing you say is, I need to do a better job of being

patient because when I'm constantly in a rush, I'm

missing meaningful moments and opportunities with you in the

family and I'm putting you guys in a deficit position.

And frustrating us and frustrating.

You. And I don't need from the garage

because I know. Okay, I know my God bless you.

Okay now okay now Here's why I am telling you that first of all

those were real. Okay, here's why I'm telling you

this it is possible for you to have life-giving conversations

through conflict. If Jennifer never got to

vocalize that it would continue to create resentment.

If she never vocalizes it, I would continue to be impatient

and hurt people. That matter.

Now here is the superpower approach because some of you are

playing a game right now. I know what I'm going to do.

I do not like this woman that I married one bit.

And so what I'm going to do is I'm going to go home and make it

look like. I was a really good Christian

and I listened to Clayton sermon and I'm going to go home to her

and I'm going to say, hey baby, I saw what Clayton and Jennifer

did and I would like you to 241 me and the only reason you are

doing that is so that when she gets done, telling you what you

need to do better, you can turn around our her and say, well,

just so you know. No, no.

The most Godly thing that you can do is seek out an

opportunity for you to get better.

So, I'm gonna go through this whole weekend and I'm going to

ultimately win because I will have asked Jennifer three times

this weekend. 2241 me and if Jennifer opens up the door, that

is a great thing. Now if she doesn't open up the

door and there's something that's wrong that I need to

address in our marriage or something.

That's messed up, I have the freedom to go.

Hey sweetheart. I need to tell you two things

that you're doing great at and one thing that's bugging me but

I'm creating a safe way to engage in a conversation that

brings about meaningful results. And here is why this Anders

Matthew Chapter 5 says this. Therefore, if you are offering

Matthew 5 · chapter mention

your gift at the altar and there, remember that your

brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift

there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to

them. Then come and offer your gift.

Because you cannot have a right relationship with God.

If your horizontal relationships with God's people, is not right?

If you want to have a great relationship with God, you have

to get these right getting these right.

Is a way that we worship God and some of us are trying to have a

great relationship with God with no respect to the other people

that Jesus died for. We go into, we engage in

Conflict, to make us more like Christ and to make them more

like Christ. And Jesus is our Supreme example

at this, we do these things because Jesus deserves it.

He forgave us which gives us the ability to forgive other people.

There is no sin that you are going to confront and somebody

else that Jesus didn't pay for and there is no sin that you're

going to confront and somebody else that Jesus hasn't already

forgiven in you Now hear this, Jesus always took the high road

and so should we Jesus never compromised on truth.

Neither should we, but Jesus continue to serve and love.

And so should we I'm willing to wager that the reason conflict

goes so poorly in our relationships is because we

don't model Jesus. Well, in our relationships, we

compromised on Truth, we don't serve, we don't love, we get

tired of taking the high road and we write ourselves a

permission slip to take the low road.

And I think we can do better. And I hope you'll do that.

We're moving to a time of decision.

For those of you here that don't have an intimate personal

relationship with Jesus Christ, I got really good news for you.

The great thing about Jesus is that he didn't wait for you to

do the right thing before. He did things on your behalf, he

made the first move. Hear this before you were ever

born. Before you took your first

breath. Before you committed your first

sin, Jesus had already paid for that sin on the cross.

He made the first move. Which means that there is

nothing that you can do to get him to love you any more than he

already does. He's already moved on your

behalf. He went to the Cross, he paid

the price that you couldn't pay. To bring you into a right

relationship with God, to solve the conflict between you and

God. The question I have for you, is

this how long will you put that relationship off?

In light of everything that he's done on your behalf for your

good, in light of everything that he has in store for you,

he's willing to put in you do for you in light of all of that.

How long will you put making a right relationship with him?

How long will you put it off? for those of us who know, Are

encouragement to you. The conflict that I would inject

into your world is, don't put it off any longer.

The dumbest thing you could ever think is that you got to get a

couple things with God or a couple things ironed out in your

life before you get to God, that's like doing your laundry

before you do the laundry, you just don't do it.

The washing machine is designed for dirty clothes, so you just

put dirty clothes in them. When you come to Jesus Christ,

you bring your sinful broken self to him and he's the one who

restores and put you back together.

And if you're here today, and you've never started an intimate

personal relationship with Jesus Christ, you're watching online,

and you want to start that. To be moment, there's gonna be

somebody over there by the bachelor, who love an

opportunity to talk with you about that or there's something

that just popped up in the chat. For those of you who are

watching online now, to those of you who have a relationship with

Jesus Christ, we must do better. Jesus has an incredibly high

standard for every single one of us because when it comes to

conflict he says things like pray for your enemies.

Pray for those who persecute you.

We have a high bar that has been set in sometimes as Christians.

We are spending as much time as humanly possible, trying to

write a permission slip to not. Take the high road, then ask God

for the strength to stay on the high road.

He did not put his holy spirit's power inside of you for you.

To take the low road, he put the holy spirit inside of you to

give you the strength to do the very thing that your flesh

doesn't want to do, which is keep loving.

Even if keep praying, even if keep caring and even if You

don't need the holy spirit's power to write yourself a

permission slip. You just don't, he put it in you

to help you live up to the high standard that he has called you

to. So here's why I'm asking you to

do. You're going to go.

Why did we come to this service? Because I might change it for a

second. Here's what I'm asking you do.

Would you be willing to come up here to the steps?

and pray for the person that, you know, you have conflict with

pray that you would see things differently.

Pray that God would take some of the heat out of the

conversation, pray that he would give you the courage to have

that conversation. Pray for those. that you're at

odds with that's what Jesus calls us to be.

Is those kind of people that you guys stand with me?

Heavenly father, I pray that you would fill our prayers with your

wisdom that you would lay heavy on our hearts.

The people that we need to have conversations with that.

We begin to give and receive conflict in such a way that it

glorifies you and makes us more like you.

And the people around us more like you.

God used conflict to make us more like your son, Jesus name.

I pray. Amen.