Resurrection Life: Sexual Faithfulness

Hello, you are listening to Second City Sermons,

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sermon. God Bless. Father in heaven we do pray

now the words of my mouth and meditations of

our hearts the things that we contemplate and

think on sit with This morning would be pleasing

in your sight Lord. I pray that you'd bring Grace

where we need grace and conviction where we need

conviction That you would cause this Lord to

indeed walk in your ways To find that the law

of the Lord is beautiful and more to be desired

than gold that is more to be desired than honey

and honey from the comb, that following you is

the way of life, that in you is the way, the

truth and the life because that is who you are.

So I pray Lord this morning that you would do

that in us, in Jesus' name, amen. All right,

I want to suggest to you something that I have

said before, I think. Now I've said this at least

an individual conversation that is this that

the devil has no raw material to work with God

creates out of nothing ex nihilo as theologians

like to say but the world the flesh and the devil

don't They twist and they distort what is given

by God God's good creation and the best things

that God gives are also often also often the

things that are most twisted About a month ago,

I heard that possibly the best word to describe

our current world is the word libertine. Libertine.

Obviously, it's related to the word liberty,

right? It actually comes from the Latin word

libertinus, which was the Roman slave who had

been freed. And so there's a good sense in which

it's something good. Liberty is actually freedom

is something to be prized in a lot of way. But

by 1500 or so, we know Actually, we know this

in part because of writings of John Calvin, really

the great theologian in the Reformed tradition

in Geneva, that the word was already being used,

libertine, to refer to somebody who didn't want

to do what somebody else told them. No authority.

Tell me what to do. The individual as the arbiter

of what is right. And most of all, what is right

is what gives that individual pleasure. in this

world, libertine. So don't tell me what to do

with my body. Don't tell me what to do with my

guns. Don't tell me what to do. Of course, the

praise of the libertine that marks our time is

in part why a series on the Ten Commandments

can feel so sticky and challenging, unlike the

permissive gods of our day. namely the gods of

self -actualization, self -expression, and self

-fulfillment, and self -self, and the permissive

gods of antiquity, which were numerous. The god

of the Bible, the one who gives the commandments

at Mount Sinai, the one who comes living the

commandments in the incarnation, the one who

gives the commandments of the second Pentecost,

they're in Acts chapter two, the father, the

son, and the Holy Spirit. is a rather intrusive

God. We prize kind of ourself as the arbiter

of the good life. And he tells us that we must

worship him alone. He tells us how we must worship.

Don't have other images of gods. One author says

that he's a good micromanager. or a bad micromanager,

depending upon how you think of micromanagers.

He even tells us how we must spend our time,

right? And he's the divine idealist. He expects

us to live in the world without violence and

vengeance, in this world without anger. Who is

this God who keeps telling us? You know, we are

going to get to the 10th commandment where the

Lord is even instructing us how we ought to desire.

and think about things. So take this libertine

ideal that we live in in our day and this reality

of God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit as speaking

to us and calling to us and speaking into all

these different aspects of our lives, both of

that first Pentecost at Sinai and the second

one at Jerusalem, and come to the seventh commandment.

And I feel like we have a little bit of a mess

on our hands. One of the great libertine creeds

in our day is no one can tell us what to do with

our bodies and our sexual desires and our constitutional

right. Thank you very much to pursue freedom.

To pursue what makes us happy. And here's what

our response often is. Can I have a little privacy,

God? Please? Right? And what does he say? No.

Thou shalt not commit adultery. Again, like last

week, it's kind of short. It's pretty simple.

It's even shorter. Again, in the Hebrew, it's

only two words. Again, lo, that's that word again,

t 'naap, t 'naap. And like last week, in some

ways it's pretty straightforward. All right,

last week is pretty straightforward. Don't murder.

Pretty straightforward this time. Don't have

sexual relationships with anyone who's not your

husband or wife. Don't commit adultery. But guess

what? Like last week, there's a lot here. A lot

here. This morning, I want to... Let me say this.

There's always so much that I don't say. There's

a lot this morning I'm not going to say and it's

still longer than... I normally have it But this

morning I want to talk to you first about how

the bible sees sex as something beautiful And

then then as something broken and then as something

that truly god does also love and redeeming Okay

Because it's true that only god creates the world

the flesh The devil the world can only distort

what god makes Okay, so first the beauty of sex

The Bible begins with the goodness of creation.

You all know this. If you read your Bible, if

you open to the first chapter, there are a few

things that are repeated and God said is repeated.

But the main thing that you will hear is he saw

that it was good. Good is the refrain. Good is

said over the creation days. That is until a

little glimpse into the sixth day when Adam is

all alone. And it is wild. It is actually wild

that there is something that is said to be not

good before the entrance of sin into the world.

Before the rejection of God, God himself looks

upon it after saying, good, good, good, good.

And he says, not good. This is what he says.

It's not good that man should be alone. Make

a helper fit for him. Now what God does is he

does not make an animal we had them already paraded

by him He does not make another Adam another

man No, he creates women they're similar, but

they're all so very different When God brings

the woman to the man, this is what the man says

Now this is what he says, okay This at last is

bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh, which

is to say we're similar. That's what he begins

with. You're me. We go together. Bone of my bone,

flesh of my flesh. She shall be called woman

because she was taken out of man. But that, the

second thing is we're similar and we're different.

She shows she shall be called Isha because she's

taken out of each similar Work together complimenting

working similarly differently Think back at the

end of chapter 1 when on the sixth day by the

way I I think the best understanding of chapter

2 in Genesis is that it's a snapshot into the

sixth day of creation Okay But on the sixth day

of creation anyway on that sixth day after God

made humankind male and female in his image He

told them what be fruitful multiply fill the

earth right And at the end of Genesis chapter

Genesis 2 · chapter mention

2 after Adam said this at last it says Therefore

a man shall leave his father and his mother and

hold fast to his wife By the way, it's the man

leaving the father and mother interesting think

different cultural tradition but hold fast cling

to be bound up in together with it says and the

man and his wife are both naked and we're not

ashamed many people properly understand that

as a sexual thing much more than that though

is the binding up together physically emotionally

mentally spiritually the whole deal they are

to hold fast to one another in heart and in body

faithfully committedly What I'm saying and what

Jesus says in Matthew 19, which we're gonna get

to, is that creation is the starting point for

understanding, well, to be honest, all of the

commandments, but very specifically the seventh

commandment. It is the starting place from which

you understand marriage and from which you understand

sexual experience. And you must start with the

idea that it is God's idea. And because it is

God's idea, It is therefore good. We must start

with the goodness of it, the beauty of it, the

gift of it. More than this actually, within the

context of this union of husband and wife, and

they're physically holding fast to one another,

naked and unashamed, it is actually how God's

mission in the world through them goes forward.

You cannot have a fruitful and multiply unless

you have a husband and a wife procreating. It's

how God made the world. It cannot happen outside

of that. God designed sex between a committed

husband and a committed wife to be the means

of his fruitfulness and multiplying happening.

Okay. Beauty and good because God made it. He

doesn't make bad things. Beauty and good because

procreation was actually part of his mission

from the very, very beginning. Which is to say

that God is not a cosmic prude kind of going

what are they doing? When they are clinging to

one another and they're bound together Marriage

is the sort of union from which children can

be conceived and sexual intercourse is meant

for that But it also does not follow that sex

in the Bible, as the traditional Roman Catholic

position has taught, is simply a utilitarian

thing, meaning it's just for procreation. It's

for just an end, a utilitarian end. One of the

things that you find in the Bible is that it's

also not just for procreation, but it's for pleasure.

Which is why we have an entire book called The

Song of Songs. I said this sermon's a little

bit long just because I'm going to read it. I'm

not going to read all of it. But it does begin

this way. let him kiss me with the kisses of

his mouth for your love is better than wine draw

me after you let us run the king has brought

me into his chambers let me skip ahead chapter

4 verses 10 and 11 how beautiful is your love

my sister my bride how much better is your love

than wine and the fragrance of your oils than

any spice Your lips drip nectar my bride honey

and milk are under your tongue and for those

of you who know the book I'm going to skip over

the parts that will make you redder than you

are This is breathed out for us the theological

word is inspired by the Holy Spirit The Bible

God's Word is certainly never pornographic but

it is unashamedly erotic at times. And it may

embarrass us because often we may be more prudish

than the Lord himself. So sex is beautiful because

it's the mean by which God intends his mission

to go forth in procreation. It's also beautiful

because he has made it pleasurable. But also

I want to suggest to you that it's beautiful

because he has also designed it to be a picture

actually of his love for us. And that the union

of husband and wife, particularly in the context

of a healthy clinging and oneness spiritually,

spiritually, mentally, physically, entirely naked,

unashamed is to actually be a sign point post

and a picture for us of God, our life with Him,

our life, what will be with Him when we are fully

united to Him. He is the great groom and His

church is the bride. And the New Heavens and

the New Earth are described as the marriage supper

of the Lamb welcoming us into consummate life

with God. Sex is for fully and permanently committed

relationships that are a blend of affection and

loyalty and biology and joy and all of that bound

up together. A marital oneness. But that in the

Bible is preparing us. That's part of why Paul

in the end of chapter five of Ephesians says

it's a great mystery when he's talking about

the husband and wife, but he then says, but I'm

talking about Christ in the church. So there's

a mystery to which it points. C .S. Lewis says

that it is the happiness of being freely, voluntarily

united in an ecstasy of love and delight. Compared

with which the most rapturous love between a

man and a woman on this earth is mere milk and

water Just say it's nothing compared to the oneness

that we will have The consummation of all things

with our Lord, but it is a picture of it So first

we have to start with beauty and design and procreation

and pleasure and picture and we have to start

with the idea that God is not a prude and We

should not be either But if we go to these things,

we have to go to the other side of it, right?

Because there is a good reason for this command.

It's a good reason for this command. Because

for all the beauty that we see, we also see a

lot of brokenness. We have to see that God loves

it so much that he builds it into how his mission

works in the world. but we cannot sort of push

aside the ways that it is so entirely destructive

at the same time. So I began this morning with

this idea that God alone creates and that when

God creates, He creates good. And that all sin,

all sin is only always a distortion of the good.

The world and the flesh and the devil can only

take and twist and distort. So we have to start

with goodness. But here's the reality, Matthew

19, 3 to 9. So the Pharisees come up to him,

Jesus, and tested him by asking, is it lawful

to divorce one's wife for any cause? He answered,

have you not read that he who created them from

the beginning created them male and female and

said, therefore a man shall leave his father

and mother and hold fast his wife and the two

should become one flesh. And this is Jesus. So

they are no longer two flesh, but one. There

is a union that takes place in this marital reality

of husband and wife that they are one flesh.

And so he says then, what you've often heard

in weddings, what therefore God has joined together,

let not man separate. Which is another way of

saying don't commit adultery. Don't be unfaithful

in your physical relationships. They said to

him, why then did Moses command one to give a

certificate of divorce and to send her away?

Let's argue about the Bible here, right? And

he said to them, because of your heart, because

of your hardness of heart, Moses allowed you

to divorce your wives. But from the beginning,

it was not so. Here's part of what I'm saying.

Jesus grounds sexual and marital ethics in creation.

That's what Jesus does. He says if you're supposed

to have a picture of what God intends for the

world in terms of our marital and sexual ethics

You have to go to the beginning Okay But what's

also interesting is he does then go on to say

and I say to you whoever divorces his wife except

for sexual Immorality and marries another commits

adultery, which she says sexual morality can

have such a great breaking effect in the world

That what is intended which is oneness Complete

oneness can be broken and broken, allowed to

be broken. You can seek divorce in this context

because it can be so utterly destructive. It

can be so breaking. I read this week of the session

minutes. from the Church of the Great Scottish

Presbyterian Pastor of the 18th century, John

Witherspoon. Session records are like elder board

minutes in the Presbyterian tradition. Okay.

And what's interesting, what I read is that almost

all of them are devoted to issues of sex and

marriage. 18th century Scotland. I also read

that there's a book that was published not too

long ago that just analyzes the consistory meetings

in Geneva under John Calvin. So I think mid 16th

century consistory meetings being a similar thing

to session records, different word for the more

or less the same thing. So those are from 1542

to 1906. Those are six and a half decades. 1572

disciplinary cases involving men, 777 involving

women who were suspended for marital abuses,

marital difficulties and mistreatments sexually.

636 men and 538 women were suspended for fornication,

sexual activity outside of marriage. Why am I

sharing this with you, right? Whether it's 18th

century Scotland or 16th century, you know, modern

day Switzerland, I think 16th century France

at the time, in Geneva or 21st century Harrisburg,

our sexual lives can be something that is a gift

and something that can break. Break families,

break marriages, break communities. We know this.

Sexual. Sexual activity improperly done which

by the way can be between improperly done can

be between a married husband wife It's a lot

unfortunately much more of that than we could

admit can wreak havoc on a family can wreak havoc

in churches Can wreak havoc in society? Societies,

of course, can only continue if they reproduce,

but that reproduction we know is best done in

certain settings where there is an actual oneness,

where there is a love and a commitment and a

binding together of the husband and the wife.

It's not just about reproducing, but reproducing

with parents who love and care for and tend to

because they love and care and tend to one another.

Casual sex that does not have the pledged fidelity

of marriage. Man is not really loving the woman

in that way. There's a using and an abusing,

and we know it. I said last week that when Jesus

says that if we harbor anger against our brother

or call him fool, that we're told that we break

the sixth commandment. Thou shalt not murder

right? Jesus then we heard this he goes on to

talk about how if we look at somebody in lust

with lustful intent We commit adultery which

is to say that The actual act of intercourse

is not the only way to commit adultery, right?

And this is a principle. It's actually a very,

very important principle. So this is an important

principle when you come to the Ten Commandments.

The rule for the Ten Commandments are that they

are typically the most extreme example of every

kind of sin that kind of falls under that category,

which is that they include all of the lesser

things that are going on in them, right? Let

me put it this way. We all know that most adulterous

situations do not begin in the bedroom. They

begin by finding that that other person connects

with your emotions in a way that your spouse

somehow doesn't or doesn't care to and you start

to talk to them more and more and you start to

confide in them more and more and they become

a surrogate spouse emotionally and that leads

to something else. We know this. They start with

noticing, with flirting. They start on computer

screens and in chat rooms and in offices. I just

heard recently of a church in our denomination

who a number of years ago, the minister had a

four -year adulterous relationship with one of

the elder's spouses who was the woman's ministry

director. Four years before anyone found out.

We know it's not just that, there's so much else

that is comprised in that kind of thing. The

Bible can speak of pornea, which includes pornography,

of fornication and incest and pedophilia and

homosexual practice and bestiality and sexual

violence and adultery because they're all little

twists on the idea of creation. right there in

Genesis one and Genesis two that Jesus points

back to in Matthew chapter 19. All of them are

Matthew 19 · chapter mention

subsumed under this command. My point is that

we twist, we distort this good thing that God

has given to us for pleasure, for our pleasure

and for our good, because that is what we do

with our sinful hearts. We take the beauty of

what God has given us and we break it and we

all do is what Jesus says. Jesus doesn't let

any of us off the hook, not one of us. And of

course, this is actually why so many Christians

prior to the Protestant Reformation thought of

sex, even within marriage, as a necessary evil.

Why is because there's so many perversions of

it. There's so many ways that we've twisted it,

distorted it. So Tertullian, the early church

father writing in the third century, regarded

the extinction of the human race preferable to

procreation. Because it's so broken, he said

there's no right place for it. We might as well

go extinct. Ambrose, famous church father in

Milan in the 4th century said that married couples

ought to be ashamed of their sexuality. Married

couples. And Augustine admitted that while intercourse

may be lawful, sexual passion is always sinful.

Great saying, Augustine. And so maybe you know

this, but the church actually began to, through

time, say that certain holy days, couples, married

couples would have to abstain. And by the time

of Martin Luther, that number of days was up

to 183, which is a half. As silly as all that

sounds, we know, we know in our own lives, in

our own hearts, in our own eyes, in our own minds,

and sometimes our own actions, how it can be

that sex in the wrong place, a glancing eye that

sits upon the subject of your desire, an addicted

screen. emotional affair, there have been plenty

of those that have been non -physical contact

that have wrecked havoc on people's lives. We

know how utterly destructive every single one

of those things can be. We may laugh off the

idea of what some of these early Church Fathers

said, but we know how destructive these things

are. We may want to dismiss this old prudishness.

We may want to show them all the song of songs.

But we know how hurtful these things are. We

know how destructive they can be. So what do

we do with it? What do we do with this reality

of the beautiful gift that God has given us that

we have twisted and distorted and it becomes

something that is so broken and it touches all

of us. What do we do? I want to tell you something

that seems very simple. But I want you to look

to the Word of God and I want you to look to

the Word of God written and embodied, okay? And

as you look to the Word of God written and embodied,

I have two words for you, okay? And these words

are for us who are tempted and who are wayward

and who are heartbroken and are filled with shame

But the first one and this is for all of us the

first word I have for you and for me is listen

Listen to the word written. You who are married,

listen to some of the stuff that it calls you

to in terms of loving each other, being united

in one flesh, being naked and unashamed, emotionally,

mentally, physically, pressed into all of it.

But also for all of us, let's give our attention

to the words of scripture as it calls us to be

vigilant. I mean, listen to some of the words

that the Bible uses. on this subject. But sexual

immorality, this is Ephesians 5 verses 3 and

Ephesians 5:3

4, but sexual immorality and all impurity and

covetousness must not even be named among you.

Not even be named among us? It's kind of intense.

Says, as is proper among the saints, let there

be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking

among you. So let's listen vigilantly to that.

1 Corinthians 6, we actually heard this. I want

you to hear it again, because it says this. Flee.

Flee from sexual morality. Every other sin in

a person commits is outside of his body, but

the sexually immoral person sins against his

own body. So the Bible does seem to say there

is a dynamic at play in some of this that is

so destructive to your own self that you must

flee it. Or again, listen to the gospel reading

today. You've heard that it was said, you shall

not commit adultery. But I say to you, this is

the words of our Lord Jesus himself upon which

the church is built. But I say to you that everyone

who looks at a woman with lustful intent has

already committed adultery with her in his heart.

And he goes on, if you're right, I caused you

to sin. Does it say close it? It says tear it

out. Tear it out and throw it away, for it's

better that you lose one of your members than

your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your

right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and

throw it away, for it's better that you lose

one of your members and that your whole body

go to hell. I mean, do you think Jesus wants

us to listen to him? He absolutely does. He is

not always talking like that. That's not the

normal sort of way that our Lord talks about

things He's saying listen to me Do not neglect

this command Listen and be vigilant I Want to

get to the second Well, let me tell you a little

bit of this. Let me tell you a quick story. Okay,

so this week I was at the Army War College. I

was actually invited really I was I felt very

honored to be invited to the 71st National Security

Seminar. The Army War College has been doing

this for 71 years, and they invite about 100

leaders, community leaders from across the country

to participate in this seminar all week. And

they have 75 nations represented. They send their

best single sort of colonel to this thing. And

this is like a program where any Army person

who's going to be colonel or above has to attend

this sort of. Program at the Army War College

and I was invited to be a part of this this week

and we heard from three four -star generals this

week okay, so like the commanding general over

Europe and Africa the commanding general over

the Western Hemisphere and then General Ron Clark

who was the commanding who is the commanding

general over the Pacific? So he's over the army

from Alaska to Australia's of South Korea and

Guam and Hawaii and Japan and all that right

and he's a phenomenal speaker and He told this

story and I tried to look it up. I took some

notes, but I didn't take them detailed now. So

I tried to look it up for you. But he told this

story of how on December 7th, 1941 right there

on Oahu, there were these two watchmen who were

watching for these 12 cargo ships. U .S. military

cargo ships that were supposed to be coming and

they were supposed to be telling people, oh,

yeah, they're on the way. And so there's these

two guys and they're up watching out for these

two cargo or 12 cargo ships and they They see

and they hear 183 other, sorry, not ships, airplanes.

Airplanes, not 12, but 183 buzz by them and they

go, huh. I guess that's the cargo ships. Of course,

General Clark says, I don't know how you mistake

12 cargo ships, U .S. military planes for 183.

Japanese fighters, but they weren't vigilant.

They weren't listening attentively. If they were,

they could hear, let alone see the noise difference.

And we all know the outcome. So first I'm just

saying, listen to the Word of God, please. Be

vigilant. Don't dismiss this. There's another

word and so One things I said is is one of the

one of the words that's towards the Word of God

as it's written the other one I want you to see

is the Word of God as it's incarnate in Jesus

and That word is receive the words love The wonderful

the wonder of the Christian faith and this is

said from the beginning of the Bible to the end

of the Bible is that God loves adulterers. There

is no sin that you have committed that is outside

of the possibility of God's grace. I know we

can just sit in our sin. We can be, and our world

does say you were defined by your sexuality,

but often we also define ourselves by our sexual

sins, right? And the Lord says, no, receive my

love. It's not the way of Jesus to be defined

by your sexual sin. It's not. He invites you

to be defined by his love for you. When we define

ourselves by our sin, we often feel so we're

outside of the possibility of God's grace. And

one of the things that the Bible says over and

over, and actually there is an entire Old Testament

book devoted to it. is that God pursues the adulterer.

So let me leave you with this illustration. I

grew up largely in the purity culture of 1990s

American evangelicalism. And so I heard an illustration

a number of times in my imagine you did too.

Probably you've heard this illustration before,

particularly if you're around my age. So the

speaker's talking about being faithful with your

bodies and sex and stuff like that. And he begins,

of course, holding up this red rose and he passes

it out. You know, I gave it to Will and he looks

at it and he goes down, he goes down, he goes

down. And of course, as you're touching it, it's

just falling apart, right? Because roses are

fragile. And at the end, of course, he comes

back and I go over to Casey and I say, hey, could

you have this rose for me? And she gives it to

me and all the petals are off. And one of the

things that the speaker would say is, do you

want... To offer your spouse this kind of thing,

you know, I mean, we're like, I mean, I'm a high

schooler in the nineties. And of course the answer

is, I don't want to do that because he says,

who wants this? Who wants this? What is the right

answer for Christians? Jesus, somebody said it.

Jesus is the right answer. He is. It's grace

for you. It's so expansive. His love is only

ever for sinners. And what is sin, but it is

spiritual adultery. Jesus' love is only ever

for adulterers. And he wants you. And he's the

faithful one. He's the constant one. He's the

one whose love never ends, who unites you to

himself. perfect oneness. He knows you perfectly.

He loves you ultimately. That is the reality

of Christ's love. He says, I want that. This

is the only kind of person he loves. Us who are

broken, beloved by God. Amen. Let's pray. Lord,

pray that you guide us in this often what is

a very hard subject. But I pray that we would

be those who listen vigilantly and who receive

love of our group. And I pray that we would cherish

in its proper place your gifts for us and that

we would be careful as we distort them so often

for our own gain, our own pleasure, our own desires,

our own devices. God, this morning I pray that

you'd also speak to us. And speak to us your

grace and your love and lift us up in Christ

in whose name we pray. Amen.