Ignite the City with Pastor Mike Krulcik

Thanks for checking out the Anchor Faith Message podcast

from St. Augustine, FL.

Now enjoy this message. We are called as a church, just

not the pastors. We are called as a church.

So every vision partner of Anchor Faith Church is called to

ignite the city, impact the nation, and influence the world.

Let's say that we're called to ignite the city, impact the

nation and influence the world. Today, I want to hone in on

igniting the city. That word ignite means to burn

with zeal, to set a blaze or set on fire.

And specifically within the night of the city, I want to

talk about family advancement. One thing that you will here a

lot at Anchor Faith Churches, we are always advancing no matter

what we're doing, igniting the city, impacting the nation or

influence in the world, we're always advancing in advance.

You'll see the definition means to make progress, to move

forward, to accelerate and move to a higher rank or level.

And the Kingdom of God is always advancing.

The realm or the territory where God is in charge is always

advancing. That means there's always

progress, you're always moving forward, there's acceleration,

and He wants you to move to a higher rank or to a higher

level. 2023 may be good for you, but God wants to see greater

things in 2024 and even more excellent things in 2025.

So we are always advancing. Now I want to go to what Jesus

talked about and Jesus is the highest model of leadership that

we have. There is no greater person that

we could look to for leadership than the Lord Jesus Christ.

So as you read the Gospels, it is awesome to see how He

interacted and move with purpose in the Gospels, how He

interacted with people and how you saw His mission that God the

Father assigned him. Now in the Gospels, the Gospel

of Matthew, the last chapter in Matthew 28, this is when Jesus

has finished his work on the earth, but he he gives us what

we call the Great Commission. The word Commission means

together, it's a mission, but the word Co means you're working

together. So as a born again believer in

the family of God, in the Kingdom of God, we are Co

laboring with him. That means God and his

sovereignty is not doing everything by himself.

There is a part that you have to play.

There's a purpose that he's assigned you on the earth.

So this is a Co mission. We are working together with the

Lord Jesus Christ and the anointing of the Holy Ghost.

You know, God's gift to the world was Jesus.

God's gift to the church is the Holy Spirit.

God's gift to the world is Jesus.

God's gift to the church is the Holy Spirit.

So when we're doing this mission with him, we have the anointing

the Holy Spirit upon us to accomplish what he's called us

to do. So in Matthew chapter 28, verse

Matthew 28 · chapter mention

#19 and verse #20 says this. Go therefore and make disciples

of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father

and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe

all things that I have commanded you.

And lo, I am with you always, even to the ends of the age.

So this is one of the great commissions that Jesus gave to

the church and he said go on to all the nation, all the all the

nations and make disciples. Now the word nations in the

Bible is where we get ethnos or ethnic groups.

So nobody's excluded from discipleship.

As a church, as Anchor Faith Church, our goal is not to make

converts but disciples. What is a disciple?

It's a person that's fully devoted to knowing the Lord

Jesus Christ. A disciple is fully devoted to

knowing the Lord Jesus Christ. A disciple is a pupil.

That means you're a student enrolled in the Kingdom

education system, having a great hunger and desire to be taught

and listen, to learn. You must want to be taught.

If you Once you think you know everything, learning ceases.

Matter of fact, if you think that you you, you know

everything, then really you're still in a state of ignorance.

You need to be like a sponge that's ready to absorb

everything that God wants to download and instruct us in.

So discipleship never stops. This is a lifelong journey in

pursuit and a mission of God the Father that he wants all of his

children to be lifelong learn learners.

In the Jewish culture, they had thing called rabbis, and a rabbi

was a teacher. Matter of fact, you'll see the

disciples of Jesus, they referred to him as a rabbi at

times. And the thing about the the

students of a rabbi, they wanted to know what their rabbi knew.

They wanted to do what their rabbi did, and they wanted to be

like their rabbi. And as a disciple, we want to

know what Jesus knows. We want to do what Jesus does

and we want to be like Jesus in the earth.

So we are commissioned to make disciples.

So my expectation and most importantly, I say God's

expectation today is you are like, father, feed me a good

spiritual meal because I want to learn.

I need the the nourishment, the nutrients because I need to grow

as a man or a woman of God. I don't know everything and we

know that people perish because of a lack of knowledge.

So download things from heaven to earth today.

Even if I go to a scripture that I've heard before, it's going to

be like the first time and I'm ready to receive.

I'm hungry, say I'm hungry, say I'm hungry, say I'm thirsty.

Hallelujah. Now in Mark chapter 16, we have

Mark 16 · chapter mention

another Commission that the Lord Jesus Christ gives, and He says

this in Mark chapter 16 verse #15 He said to them, go into all

Mark 16 · chapter mention

the world and preach the gospel to every creature.

Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature.

What's the gospel? Well, we know it's the gospel of

the Kingdom. If you've been with Anchor Faith

Church for any period of time, or you're more recently

attending, you're going to learn about the Kingdom of God.

And like I said, that's the realm.

It's the basilia, the realm of the territory where a king is in

charge. The Bible's about a king, his

Kingdom, and his royal offspring, Hallelujah.

And we're in the Kingdom of God. Matter of fact, in Luke 1721,

the disciples said, Jesus, when is the Kingdom going to come?

He said, behold the Kingdom come with observation.

The Kingdom of God is within you, so as soon as you make

Jesus Lord, you're within the Kingdom of God.

You've been taken out of the Kingdom of darkness and

translated into the Kingdom of God.

I'm out of that jurisdiction and I'm in the King's jurisdiction

now. He said go into all the world

and preach the gospel. That's good news.

It's good tidings. We have great news for the

world. There's hope for the world in

truth. There's hope for the world in

the gospel of the Kingdom. There's liberty, there's

freedom, there's healing, there's provision in the gospel

of the Kingdom. There's purpose within the

gospel of the Kingdom. Now he said go in all the world.

So in one Commission he says make disciples of all nations.

But in this one he says to go in all the world.

Now the world, if you look that up in the Greek, it literally

means the cosmos or the systems or arrangement of the world.

And what I mean by that you'll see on the screen in any society

when we talk about the world in any society dating back to the

beginning of civilizations, there's been seven things that's

within any society that makes systems or arrangements or

order. And you'll say, see these I go A

through G just helps me remember them.

So there's arts, there's business, there's congregations,

there's direct media, there's education, there's family and

there's government. So within any civilization,

these seven characteristics can be found as structure.

And Jesus said, I want you to go into these systems and preach

what the gospel. So guess what, when you go to

work tomorrow, if you're an arts, if you're in business, if

you're in congregations, which is organizations or assemblies

or boards, if you're in direct media, if you're in the

educational field, if you're in families, which all of us are in

families see law and in government, he said.

You're to go into all the world and preach the gospel.

So there's an assignment and a purpose for your existence in

the Kingdom of God. Today I'm honing in or taking

one of these systems and it's called the family.

And this is family advancement. God wants you to make progress,

accelerate, grow, and move to a higher rank or level in the

family unit. I got 3 yeses.

This gets me jacked excited because because if the family's

strong, the church will be strong.

If the family unit is strong, then the church will be strong.

If you got a jacked up, dysfunctional family, guess

what's coming to church? Hallelujah.

Now, does God work in that and through that?

Absolutely. But the things that you are

learning at the church should trickle over into the family.

Now this is sobering. You could sing, dance, shout and

run at the altar, but if you go home and you're Freddie the

freak or you're not living it out, you become a hypocrite.

And the things that you're being taught at Anchor Faith Church,

these are to be applied. Truth is like soap, it only

works if you apply it. So if you're a stinky spouse,

we're going to give you some truth today, some soap.

But you actually need to live these things out at the house

between your call and your character.

Gives you a thing called credibility.

All of us are called to the Great Commission.

Do you have Christ like character that you can conduct

yourself at in the home to give credibility?

Your kids will not always listen to you, but they'll always

imitate you. I remember when Abigail, my

oldest daughter, I was working out in the yard, she was talking

to me and you know, she just talks a lot at that age.

And I remember two things out of this conversation.

One the Holy Ghost said look her in the eyes when she's talking

to you. Don't have your back towards

her. Give her the attention 'cause

you're not. You need to set the standard of

what a real man does. How many of you spouses know if

you just look your spouse in the eye when they're talking to you

instead of looking at notifications?

I'm just going to throw this in there.

If you have to text each other and you're next to each other on

the couch, there's an issue. But I remember two things on

that. That was one of them is to look

her nice. Secondly was I spit when she was

talking to me. I was outside work and then she

spit. I thought, Lord, I don't want

her spitting. That's in ladylike so your kids,

they're not always listen to you, but they'll always imitate

you. Do you realize you carry an

atmosphere with you and the atmosphere you permit is the

atmosphere that's produced and God wants heaven filled homes at

Anchor Faith Church because he wants a heaven filled church.

What I mean about that by that Romans 1417 says, I'll say it

this way, God wants Kingdom filled homes and a Kingdom

filled Anchor Faith Church. Because in Romans 1417 it says

the Kingdom of God is not meat and drink, but it's

righteousness, it's peace and it's joy in the Holy Ghost.

So when we come into our houses as a man or woman of God, you

set the atmosphere in righteousness, in peace and in

joy in the Holy Ghost. Now listen.

Wisdom has taught us mastery of fundamentals is critical to

success. In Proverbs 24 talks about

there's three things that build a home.

You can have a house, but the question is, is it a home?

And you need wisdom, understanding and knowledge to

build a home. But wisdom has taught us that

mastery of fundamentals is critical to success.

John Wooden, the great coach of UCLA basketball team back in the

70s who won multiple national championships, never talked

about winning to his players. He preached fundamentals, he

preached the process, and winning took care of itself

every season. Do you realize that John Wooden

literally showed his players how to put on socks and shoes so

they wouldn't get blisters when they're playing basketball?

You realize the first thing he taught him was not plays or how

to slam dunk. He taught them how to dribble,

shoot, pass, rebound for good. Good Lord, box out.

Have me even watch the basketball game and think box

out. You know, as my wife, she was

coaching. I remember the the Washington

girl, she'd always say, put your butt in the other player and box

out. It's a fundamental right get

position, but wisdom has taught us that mastery of fundamentals

is critical to success in Matthew chapter 16 verses 18

Matthew 16:18–19

through 19. I'm just laying a foundation

before we to get to some principles and keys that God is

going to give you today that unlock the Kingdom of God in

your home and in your life. How many of you want the Kingdom

of God unlocked and operative and fully functioning in your

life? It is completely up to you.

It's his truth, but you have to apply it.

So in Matthew chapter 16, this is where in Peter has the

Matthew 16 · chapter mention

revelation. You remember this story that

they said, who do you say that I am?

And some say this person, that person, he said, but who do you

say that I am? And Peter said, you are the

Christ, the Messiah, the Son of the living God.

He and Jesus said to him, You're blessed flesh and blood has not

revealed this to you, but my Father, which is in heaven, He

said, and I will give unto you Peter the not key, singular, but

keys plural of the Kingdom. He goes on to say, whatever you

bind on earth will be bound in heaven.

Whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.

You realize that? Put the responsibility into the

hand or into the person that heard that.

So whatever you allow in your house is on your watch.

Whether it's functioning well or not is on your timetable.

Keys lock and keys unlock, but the word keys in the Greek means

fundamental principles and wisdom has taught us that

mastery of fundamentals or keys is critical to success.

So if you want to have a successful family or successful

marriage or successful parenting, you better know the

principles of the Word of God. God loves us so much there was

no confusion. He gave us 66 books to learn

from and that this is His love letter to us.

This is instruction from the King to us so we could have a

successful life. Hallelujah.

So one key to success that I'm going to start off with.

I'm going to give you 2 general keys to success.

And then we're going to get real specific for women and then for

men. So the goal of this is not to

point to your left or right. I'm prefacing this the the goal

is for you to point to yourself. So I don't want no elbows, no

stairs. You look straight ahead.

Hallelujah. So in Acts chapter one, and

we're going to read verses one through 8, this is one general

key that you need in the home. If we're going to ignite this

city and we're to touch the world.

This is one key that you need in the house to experience success.

And we know this is the ushering in of a new dispensation.

Some say the dispensation of grace, which is true, but it's

also the dispensation of the Holy Ghost.

So in Acts chapter one it says the former account I made, O

Theopolis, of all that Jesus began both to do and to teach,

until the day in which He was taken up.

After He, through the Holy Spirit, had given commandments

to the apostles whom He had chosen, to whom He also

presented himself alive after his suffering by many infallible

proofs, being seen by the disciples for 40 days and

Speaking of things pertaining to the Kingdom of God, and being

assembled together with them, He commanded them not to depart

Jerusalem. But to wait for the promise of

the Father, which he said, you have heard from me.

For John truly baptized with water, but she shall be baptized

with the Holy Spirit not many days from now.

Therefore, when they had come together, they asked Jesus,

saying, Lord, we at this time restore the Kingdom to Israel.

And Jesus said to them, It's not for you to know the times or

seasons which the Father has put in his own authority, but you

shall receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you,

and you shall be witnesses to me in Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria and

the uttermost parts of the earth.

Now I love how this is read and written because the 1st place he

says is Jerusalem, the home base and how you going to reach the

World if you're not reaching your house.

And what man? What good is if a man gains the

whole world but forfeits his soul?

So there is a premium that God puts on the home.

There's a purpose as a man or woman.

Matter of fact, if you're not fulfilling your purpose as a man

or a woman, it's hard to fulfill a specific purpose in the

Kingdom of God. So he starts in the home.

But he said you need power. You realize that marriage, your

marriage needs the Holy Ghost. Hallelujah.

You know, there's sometimes we call it intense times of

fellowship, which is a, a political way of saying

arguments, frustrations, breakdown in communication.

And you need the Holy Ghost in that moment because you know

what the Holy Ghost is going to do.

He said, John baptize you with water, but I'm baptizing you

with the Holy Ghost in Matthew 311.

He said, I'll baptize you with the Holy Ghost and with fire,

with fire. So one of the things the Holy

Spirit does in your life, he brings the fire.

And a lot of people get divorced before they can get married.

A lot of people get discouraged before the marriage grows.

The word marriage in the Greek is gamayo, which means a

blending together through intense heat and pressure.

Hallelujah. You can say Amen.

Or you could say oh me. But it's true.

And what I say, most people get divorced because they don't let

the pressure put them together. They let it pull them apart.

When I was young growing up where there was Four Seasons in

the great state of Ohio, I had a Mongoose bike with PEDs and I

remember jumping that thing as a young man off the curbs and I

end up breaking the frame on that thing.

Well my father was an account for Worth and steel so after I

broke the frame he took it to work and had won the welders

Weld that part that was broken and after he got done putting it

through the fire, he told my father.

He said that's the strongest point on that frame now because

it just went through the heat. So what I'm saying is don't let

the devil pull you apart. You need to come together with

the help of the Holy Ghost. You know he's going to burn some

things off of you and your marriage covenant.

Listen, your role, listen closely is not to play the part

of the Holy Ghost for your spouse.

I'll say it on this side. Your role, husband or wife, is

not to play the role of the Holy Spirit for your spouse.

You know a lot of people are praying.

Lord, change my spouse. I'm going to submit to you.

You need to pray. Lord, change me.

Holy Ghost, what do I need to do?

When we come into marriage counseling, there's typically a

list of everything the other person is or isn't doing.

And we have to refocus that list when we're meeting with him and

say, listen, what is your role within the marriage covenant

'cause I don't care if he is Freddie the Freak.

He could be and he needs slap spiritually, I get it, and put

back in his place. But that doesn't mean that you

still don't do your part. God is not going to judge you

based upon what Freddie the Freak did or didn't do.

He's going to base you on what did I call you to do?

And you know, with the Holy Ghost, it's not natural, it's

supernatural. With that anointing, you could

help win and be solid and be stable in any situation.

Hallelujah. So the Holy Ghost, the Bible

says he's our helper. Guess what?

He comes to bring help in the marriage covenant, He comes help

in parenting, he comes to help the family.

If there's brokenness, dysfunction, it says he's the

healer. Acts 1038 said that how Jesus

went about doing good healing, all that were pressed to the

devil for the Holy Spirit was with him.

There was an anointing to bring healing.

Even if you grew up at transgenerationally and

dysfunction after dysfunction, guess what?

God can bring normality. It stops with you now and every

generation after that it's going to be functioning in Christ.

Amen. So you need the Holy Spirit

operating to have a successful marriage company.

He will lead you, guide you, remind you, and burn some things

off. He'll strengthen you and He's

the great God on the inside. Now second general principle or

key, as Jesus said to Peter, I'll give you the keys of the

Kingdom we can find in Corinthians, first Corinthians.

Now first Corinthians. That's a messed up church you

ever wrote. Read all 16 chapters, which we

encourage an anchor faith church to read through the Bible.

Amen. Hallelujah every year, but this

is a spirit filled church. But they were a messed up

church. In chapter one they had divided

the church with their personalities.

In chapter 2 they were operating in natural wisdom and not godly

wisdom. In chapter 3, they're operating

with a carnal, not mind and not a spiritual mind.

In chapter four, they forgot who their spiritual father was.

In chapter five, he had to deal with immorality.

In chapter 6, they were bringing lawsuits against one another in

the church. In Chapter 7, they had messed up

marriages. In chapter 8, they had messed up

their own lives. By operating in liberty.

You don't have to do everything you have permission to do.

The state of Florida has legalized a thing called

marijuana. You don't have to do everything

you have permission to do. So they had messed it up through

liberty. In Chapter 9, they refused to be

corrected. In chapter 10, they were given

to idolatry. In Chapter 11, they messed up

the communion table. In chapter 12, they messed up

spiritual gifts. In chapter 13, they messed up

love. In chapter 14, they had messed

up public worship. In chapter 15, they had messed

up the resurrection. This was a messed up church, but

even in a mess, God can make a message.

I think the most powerful thing is the apostle Paul was pinning

this with the help of Holy Ghost is when we get to chapter 13 to

cure the ill of the mess because that's the great love chapter.

And I want to submit to you. If you're going to make your

family effective and successful, you need to be operating the

love of God. So I'm going to read you from

the Amplified Bible, First Corinthians chapter 13, verses 4

1 Corinthians 13:4–8

through 8. And if you need help in your

home, this is a great chapter to chew on day after day, minute

after minute, week after week, month after month.

And the Amplified reads it this way.

Love endures with patience and serenity.

Love is kind and it's thoughtful.

It's not jealous or envious. Love does not brag and it's not

proud or arrogant. Love is not rude.

It's not self seeking. Love is not provoked, not overly

sensitive and easily angered. Love does not take an account a

wrong, endured. It does not rejoice as

injustice, but rejoices with the truth when right and truth

prevail. Love bears all things regardless

of what comes, believes all things looking for the best in

each other, hopes all things, remaining steadfast during

difficult times. Love endures all things without

weakening. Love never fails and never fades

nor ends. What a power packed scriptures

to help us overcome. Amen.

So if you're in a mess, if you actually do these things, apply

it like soap, guess what? You're going to start to see

success in the family. Now there's three

characteristics of love, There's three provisions of love, and

there's three evidences of love. Now, I'm only going to give you

the three evidences of love, but I want to insert right now.

If you're a man, if you're a man, if you are a covenant man,

you can learn these other six characteristics if you sign up

for 3/18. Every man, if he's going to

grow, needs accountability. Every man, if he's going to

grow, needs discipleship. I'm going to lean in real heavy

right now, and I believe this with all my heart.

If there's a problem in the earth, God comes to the man

first. It's not that the woman doesn't

have a part or she's not held accountable, but I get that

pattern from the Garden of Eden. And listen, in the Garden of

Eden, before the church was founded, the home was founded

because God and his mastery of architecture and blueprint knew

he had to build a family and then build the church.

So there's two vehicles or organizations or ordained

institutions that God has operating in the earth today and

it's the family and it's the church.

But when the family fell in Genesis, guess what God did

first? He came to the man and said,

where are you? And my answer is I was at 3:18,

'cause I wouldn't have made the wrong decision.

We know what Adam said. Well, it's the woman you gave

me. But every man needs submitted to

accountability other godly men. It's going to be an encouraged

be able to encourage and sharpen them and then give them the

discipleship tools to be successful.

So I'll just double dog challenge you today.

If you're considering thought about your wife's encouraging

you to sign up for 3/18, take the challenge.

The principles that I learned from Doctor Cole back when my

journey began in 1997 revolutionized me as a man.

It wasn't Arnold Schwarzenegger that set me free because there

was a time in my life where I was looking at other men as

mentors, but they weren't the man that I needed to emulate.

It was the Lord Jesus Christ and he had an anointing and in a way

of speaking to man, men that really set a foundation in my

life. And I believe as the house is

only go as well as the man goes, I don't believe if mama's happy,

everybody's happy. I believe when the God says the

man's in the right position, it gives the greatest propensity

for the home. I'll say this as Jesus is a

foundation to the church. A man is a foundation to the

home and if the foundation is corrupt, the home is corrupt.

So I was just kind of whet your appetite.

If you're considering coming, it's going to be a challenge.

There's going to be times when you feel like quitting.

We've had men feel say we feel like throwing the books against

the wall because it's challenging.

It'll feel like it's stepping on your feet, slapping across the

face, but it's a good, it's will do you good for your journey.

To me, it's like the spiritual gym.

There's only so much you can do by yourself if you're stuck on a

lift, sometimes all you need is 2 fingers on a bench press to

get you through that sticking point.

And 318 could be those those spiritual principles and

accountability to help you men get past some sticking points in

your life. Amen.

So the three evidences love are this because we're talking about

First Corinthians 13 verses 4 through 8.

1 Corinthians 13:4–8

Evidence means this is how I prove that I love you.

You ever told your wife that you love her?

Has she ever said prove it? Hallelujah.

Don't answer that out loud. But this goes for anything

general or specific when it comes to love.

So the evidence of loves is this.

Number one, there's selflessness, not selfishness.

A child is selfish in the center of its own universe.

A child, if he doesn't get its own way, throws a temper

tantrum. How?

If you're 52 years old and throwing a temper tantrum in

your marriage, you're acting like a child. 1st Corinthians 13

says, when I was a child, I thought like a child.

I spoke like a child, understood like a child.

But Paul said it's time to put away childish things and an

evidence of love is selflessness.

Selflessness means I'm there's a lack of preoccupation with my

own interest, advancement and desire.

I'm more concerned with meeting the needs and desires of others.

Hallelujah. So if you're a spouse, guess

what? I'm more interested in meeting

the needs of my spouse than I'm concerned about my own emotions,

thoughts, or desires. Now, the great thing about God

and all of His infinite wisdom, as you give, you're going to

receive. See, a lot of people are trying

to receive and then give, but by faith we give selflessness and

then we receive the benefit. The second thing about the

evidence of love is the desire to benefit the one loved.

And a benefit means something that's produced that's good or

helpful. Did you know helping with

laundry is helpful? Do you know a real man can

vacuum a rug? A real man can help clean the

home. A real man could help get the

kids ready for bed. A real man doesn't leave dirty

dishes in the sink and fight with his wife as molds growing

for a week to see who's going to do the dishes.

Hallelujah, Hallelujah. The third thing of an evidence

of love, how I prove is a desire for unity.

And this only comes through communication.

You know, there's three big things in the marriage covenant,

communication, sex and money. And the last two hinge on the

first one, communication. If you can't communicate, the

other two aren't going to progress.

But you can't have unity without learning how to talk.

But in evidence of love means I'm going to be unified, which

means men, you need to learn how to communicate.

Now you know the average man speaks a lot less words than the

average woman. That's when That's why when you

come home after 8 hours, 10 hours at work and your wife

asked you, honey, how was your day?

You say it was good one adjective to describe being gone

8 to 10 hours. And then she'll start asking you

some questions and you think she's nagging you when all she

wants to do is be intimately acquainted with you and know how

your day was. So men, we need to learn how to

talk. Amen.

Now I'm I'm going to bring this plane in for a landing.

I'm going to give you 2 keys for the women.

And to be have equality. I'm not going to do anything for

the men. I'm just kidding.

I'm going to give you 2 keys for the men.

So Are you ready? Let's go to Proverbs 2715.

Hallelujah. A continue dripping on a very

rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.

Well, this will make you want to run away.

Now, the the keyword is continual.

Ladies, when you practice something, that means you

perpetually do it. So if this happens occasionally,

it's not continual. Are you with me?

So there's no condemnation, only conviction to bring you up

because we're to advance always, right?

So if you want to go to a higher rank or level, don't be

contentious. And it says continually.

So I don't practice this. This is why you need the Holy

Ghost, because the Holy Spirit will tap you on the inside and

say, my daughter, you are being continually contentious.

Now, what's contentious? It means you find fault.

It means you like to fight. You're a brawler.

You're antagonistic. I'll say this way, you always

put him down. Contentious means that you're

against and you're a rivalry. Instead of completing, you're

competing in the Garden of Eden. It was oneness, Adam said.

She's bone in my bone and flesh in my flesh.

They were to be one unit, harmony and concord.

She wasn't competing against God.

She was completing her assignment in God's picture of

what the marriage should look like and operate like.

But you can be a contentious woman when you're complaining

fault finding you're always against your husband.

You know, the Bible says, and I'll give this I was said and

tithe and offering time that women you need to if you're if

you're a single woman, one of the first requirements.

Obviously they need to be born again, but they need to have a

job, right, because God gave Adam a job before he gave him

his wife. But do you know that the Bible

says when he formed Eve, he made a woman that was going to be for

him. So if you if for men, if you

want to, if you're single and you're trying to get a candidate

as a wife, you need to make sure that she's for you.

And a contentious woman continually is always against

her husband. Always fight, fight, fault

finding, criticizing, complaining, putting down.

And I'll say this is typically typically because she's not well

with herself and you need the Holy Ghost to touch that part of

your life so you can come alongside him.

The Message Bible reads it like this.

A nagging spouse is like the drip, drip, drip of a leaky

faucet. You can't turn it off and you

can't get away from it. How many men want to come home

to that? Proverbs 2119 says this.

It's better to dwell in the wilderness than when they can

with a contentious and an angry woman.

So listen, I'm going to give you an antidote, ladies.

If you feel contentious, frustrated, fussy, disappointed,

there's an antidote. What's an antidote?

A lot of times we use that in conjunction when when you get

bit with something that's poisonous, that could end your

life. And listen, contention can end

your life. What I mean by that it's not

necessary that you'll be separated as far as death, but

death means separation. You could be separated from your

spouse and God never wanted to be like that because year after

year, decade after decade, all you do is be contentious.

But a lot of times we use an antidote as this, you've been

bitten by something and they got to give you an antidote.

What to cure what the poison was and in in Ephesians chapter 4

Ephesians 4:31–32

verses 31 through 32, God gives an antidote for in this specific

scenario, I'm talking about the wife to be healed.

I'm going to read this from the amplified Bible.

It says this, let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamour,

perpetual animosity, resentment, strife, fault finding and

slander be put away from you, along with every kind of malice,

all spitefulness, verbal abuse. Now the listen to verse 32.

Because this is the cure. This is the cure.

Are you with me? Say this is the cure.

Be kind, helpful to one another, tender hearted, compassionate,

understanding. And I'm going to hone in on

this, forgiving one another readily and freely, just as God

in Christ also forgave you. Now forgiveness, if you want

health and wholeness and you don't want to be a contentious

woman, you need to make sure that you're in forgiveness.

Forgiveness comes on three levels or three dimensions #1 if

you don't done wrong, thank, thank the Lord that he's given

us a key, a fundamental that we can run to if we blow it.

And it's a thing called repentance and forgiveness.

First, we go before God and we say we're sorry that we blew it.

Secondly, we go before those that we've injured or harm and

say, guess what? I'm, you know what that does in

the marriage when you say I'm the one instead of you're the

one boy that disarms and dismounts some arguments, but

you go before the injured or the offended party, say please

forgive me. And then thirdly, you need to

make sure you forgive yourself. That's self help and self-care.

self-care. When you say, Lord, you're not

holding that against me anymore. I've asked, asked for your

forgiveness. I've applied the blood and guess

what? You're not holding that against

me. So I don't need to hold that

against myself. So listen, drop it, release it

and let it go. That's the cure for contention

is love in that dynamic. The second specific principle I

want to give you as a wife and end on a positive.

Listen, there's so many principles in the word of God.

I'm just trying to Wet Wet your taste buds to two so you

continue to read the word and find these truths so that you

can be a success. Proverbs 1914 says this.

Houses and riches are an inheritance from fathers, but a

prudent wife is from the Lord. Hallelujah.

I like that the writer in this wisdom literature of Proverbs

saw that there was more value in treasure in a wife than just

gold, silver and riches. What a picture.

Husbands, you need to look at your wife as a treasure chest.

She's so valuable. And when woman you need to see

yourself as that and be prudent. Cause a prudent wife is from the

Lord and you want to have that in your marriage cover.

Now prudence means this, to be circumspect, to have insight,

wisely understand and cause to prosper.

I'll repeat that to be prudent means to be circumspect to have

insight to wisely understand and cause to prosper.

So prudent wife has these characteristics of circumspect

having insight wisely understanding her husband and

causes the household to prosper. That's a prudent woman and

really this all that gives a a picture or definition of a godly

wife examines all sides and as insight or introspection and

knowledge and skill and view into the interior of anything.

A prudent wife means she sees everything.

She examines everything. She has thorough knowledge and

skill. She has view on the interior of

anything. When I think of that, it makes

me think that God, when you created woman, you pulled her

from the inside of man. So she knows what's going on

inside of you and you pulled her from a thing called a rib, which

brings protection. So a prudent wife is going to

bring protection and see things and discern things that are

going on around the home in the home or trying to come against

the home. And she's going to come and help

the the house to prosper becomes she becomes an aide.

So prudent wife is a great blessing and a prudent woman is

wise. A prudent woman, when she sees

her husband taking out the trash, she'll say freeze.

He'll be like what? And she'll say, you look good

taking out that trash. That's a prudent life.

Proverbs 14 one says this, the wise woman builds her house.

A prudent woman built her house, but the foolish 1 pulls it down

with her own hands. Wow, that is a sobering but at

the same time exciting scripture because the ability to to

succeed is in your own power. Joshua 24 says this.

Joshua said I've said before you life and death choose life.

This verse teaches you women how to choose life and how to

succeed in the marriage covenant.

And a prudent woman will bring blessing, prosperity, goodness

and growth to that home. Proverbs 31 is a wonderful book

because primarily the greatest percentage of that is about what

a godly woman looks like and operates with men.

Women. You should be encouraged to go

read that because it taught She was in business.

She prayed at night. That's what I get out of because

she said she worked at night. So she was like the psalmist

that said even at night, my heart is meditating upon the

word. She'll get up and cover her

household in prayer. I plead the blood of Jesus.

My kids are going to serve the Lord.

My husband's going to serve God. We have peace in this house.

Ain't no woman, loose woman or anything else going to come

against my kids, My husband, she will pray.

She'll be a woman of virtue. And you know what the Bible

says? That her household will rise up

and call her blessed. Why?

Because she doesn't pull down the house, but she builds it

because she's prudent. And what a prayer to pray.

God, if you're a wife, I need wisdom today.

Operate. Thank you for the anointing to

operate in this role and be a great blessing and benefit to my

household. Now we get to the men.

Hallelujah Colossians chapter 3 verse #19 I find this verse

Colossians 3 · chapter mention

interesting because this is written to the church at

Colossae which is a spirit filled tongue talking Bible

believe in church but yet the Holy Ghost by inspiration of

Paul pin this in the Bible. So there's obviously something

going on that need to be addressed with the men in their

role and the Holy Spirit identifies it.

He said husbands love your wise and do not be bitter toward

them. This isn't a fleshly carnal

person. This is a spirit filled

believer. And yet there's a propensity to

be bitter towards your wife. What does bitter mean?

It means you're sharp, you're sarcastic, you're biting.

You know what it means to bite. You give a quick answer because

you're irritated. You're on edge.

You could be angry, right? This word bitter means you're

painful to the mind. What an indictment.

You don't want your wife to think of you as being painful to

her. When you go home, she should

want you home. When you go home, she should say

my husband's home. There's stability, there's

security, there's identity. When my husband come homes, he

brings an atmosphere with them of peace and righteousness and

joy. You don't want to come home as a

bitter man. And she's thinking, I wish he

would have stayed at work. Hallelujah.

A Kingdom man is well received in his house.

I'll say it again, a Kingdom man is well received in his house.

He's not sharp, he's not sarcastic, he's not body, he's

not painful to the mind. That's because we operate in a

thing called love, man. It says love your wife.

Don't be bitter or acidic to them.

The word love. I want to give you one

definition, definition of love to cure bitterness.

And you know the Bible says in First Corinthians 13, as we read

it already, love is long-suffering.

One translation says love is patient.

Patience means I have a long Wick.

You remember Wild Coyote and the Roadrunner?

And he's always trying to blow him up with dynamite.

And every time when it didn't explode, he would go look at the

Wick, right? And it was right there going to

explode. But don't be explosive.

Have a long Wick, man. This isn't you.

This is the supernatural power of God working inside of you.

That's why you got to say I got patience.

I got the love of God on the inside of me.

I have a long Wick. I'm long-suffering.

I can, I like this. Patience means I can't endure.

I'm just not built for a good time.

I'm built for a long time. And this journey is not a

Sprint, it's a marathon. And so for me to come to 318 and

be around other godly men and have accountability, I'm going

to learn a thing called patience, which means I got

endurance. I can do it.

I'm not going to grow weary in well doing, even though she's

acting like someone who sits on a broomstick right now.

I got a thing called endurance and my love is going to conquer

her crazy Cray Cray right now because she acting funny.

But guess what? Patience Trump's that weirdness.

Hallelujah. You know, there's certain times

of the month. I'll keep this real general.

That'd be good for you men to notate on your calendar.

So a week prior to that date, you can practice a little more

patience instead of thinking what is wrong with this woman?

This is the woman, she's what's going on.

The emotions are all and God's saying, listen, long Wick

endurance, listen. Patience means you're constant

and you're steadfast. You know man, if you're going to

overcome bitterness, you need to be like Jesus.

Jesus was the same yesterday, today and forever.

Instability in the man creates instability in the home.

Jesus was never in stable or unstable with the church.

He got. He got great.

He brought great stability to the church, and men should bring

great stability to the home. I know this is kind of a graphic

picture, but I'm, I'm going to plant this in your mind.

When you talk about constancy, endurance and steadfastness, it

really gives a picture of a statue.

And a statue doesn't change no matter what happens to it.

And my wife, when we used to live in Oklahoma, she was taking

the Turnpike back from Norman, a Broken Arrow.

And you got to stop there to pay.

And when she reached out to pay, there was a bird that Pooh

poohed on her arm. Can you imagine the timing just

like that? And it hit her.

Matter of fact, it happened to my daughter at Washington DC

trip, right? That's a curse.

I cursed that bird poop off a family.

But I think of of a statue. If a statue gets pooped on, it

stays the same. So if you're getting that in

your marriage, men, just be steady.

You realize if you freak out, she's going to freak out.

You realize if you react and not respond to the emotions, come

on, man. You're like, man, if I would

have just handled that better, it wouldn't get dragged on for

four weeks. Be honest.

If I would have handled that better, I could have been a cure

and I added to I've been there before.

I thought, OK, I'll learn patience steadfast, right?

I want to close with this Ephesians chapter 5 verses 25

Ephesians 5:25–27

through 27. I'm going to read this from the

amplified Bible. It says, Husbands, love your

wives, seek the highest good for her, and surround her with a

caring, unselfish love, just as Christ also loved the church.

And he gave himself up for her so that Jesus might sanctify the

church, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the

Word of God, so that in turn He might present the church to

Himself in glorious splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any

such thing, but that she should be holy, set apart for and

blameless. What a great scripture.

I want to take one principle out of that, though.

He said that He would cleanse her with the washing of the

water by the Word. Men, what are you saying to your

wife? Men, what are you constantly

communicating to your wife? We were in a counselling meeting

one time and my wife and I and I remember this.

The husband literally said she's a small ball and chain.

Do you know in Proverbs 1821, it says life and death are in the

power of the tongue. Those that love, it's going to

eat the fruit of it. That speaks of bondage.

Why in the world would I want to confess with my words that have

creative power? You're, you're made in the image

of God and in his image He's given us creative power on the

inside also. So in Genesis, guess what God

did when he created the world? He spoke it into existence.

God said it, He saw it and he saw that it was good.

Notice, notice a pattern. God said it, then he saw it, and

then he saw that it was good. Husbands, if you would say it,

then you would see it and you would see that it is good.

Too many times though, men are wanting to see it and then say

it by face. Say it.

Call her a woman of God. Call her anointed woman.

Call her bless. Call her full of peace.

Call her full of prosperity. Call her what God calls her.

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