How to Identify the Obvious in a Culture that is Oblivious | Oblivious

Hey, my name is A.

A.

Justin Kowalski.

Am the associate pastor at our Palm Avenue campus in Riverside, California.

Thanks so much for listening to Sandals Church.

Our vision is to be real with ourselves, God, and others.

We hope you enjoy this message.

Hey, guys.

Welcome to Sandals Church.

Man, I am super excited about this new series called Oblivious.

Anybody heard of or met anybody?

Wait, hold on.

Hello?

Yeah.

No, I'm preaching right now.

No, I'm kind of in the middle of something.

You need me?

Okay, I'll talk to you later.

Bye.

Anybody hate that?

Anybody hate that?

Oh, my gosh.

You can't go anywhere anymore without this, right?

Especially our old people.

I love you old people, but this there needs to be training.

If you were over 70.

Okay.

Yeah.

Anybody been in the doctor's office?

Yeah.

Got the diarrhea?

Yep.

Thank you for sharing.

Thank you for sharing.

Oh, my gosh.

We just live in a culture that's oblivious.

And you know why that is?

We're focused on this.

We got our headphones on.

And here's the thing.

The world is all about me.

Me.

My world, my feelings, my identity.

And here's the thing.

At church, we're about him.

And that's going to be really challenging for us, because even when we come to church,

when we live in a me world and we live in a me culture, it's hard for us to divorce

ourselves from ourselves so that we can hear from God.

And that's what I want to challenge you to do in this series.

We all know someone that's oblivious.

Anybody raise your hands.

Okay?

And if your hand ain't up, it's you.

It's you.

Right now, your spouse is like, we're going to talk about how to identify the obvious in a

culture that's oblivious.

We live in a culture that is oblivious and often unaware of their surroundings.

Anybody travel to a foreign country?

You know what's not in a foreign country?

Danger signs.

The rest of the world knows Americans are like, what a cliff?

And we just go right off it.

In America, there are signs everywhere.

A good friend of mine was a missionary in Africa, and I'm like, man, this is dangerous.

And he goes, yeah, in Africa, stupid people die in America.

They multiply.

That's what he said.

It's like, oh, my gosh.

And so many of us are just completely unaware of our surroundings.

I want you to know you're in church right now.

Or maybe you're watching church from home right now.

And this is a very different thing that happens anywhere else in life.

This is the place where heaven and earth connect.

It's the place where we reserve out of our time with God for God, so we can hear from God.

But do you know that many people, when they come to church, are oblivious?

Even in church?

Even in church.

I hear stories all the time of people in church doing what I just did answering their

phones.

I had a friend of mine, huge church, not Sandals church, a huge church.

And he said a guy answered his phone and walked out in a conversation while he's

preaching.

And my friend wanted to be like, Hello, I have the microphone.

But he didn't do that because their vision isn't being real.

You know, I would have said something.

It's a true story.

I cannot tell you some of the most bizarre things that I have seen at our church.

When people get together, just completely oblivious of others.

Man, we've had all kinds of situations.

Some of you, when I preach, you just give me the and then some of you are artificially

peppy, and you're a distraction, man.

We had a happy clapper at Hunter Park a couple of weeks ago.

And I don't know if this person was on something or off something, but we needed to help

them.

And it's just absolutely crazy.

The things that people do in church, wear to church, say in church, and what we need to do

at church, we say, okay, what am I oblivious to when I am around others?

And so here's the thing is, I know many of you have kids in church.

And look, we love your kids, and we care for your kids.

We spend a lot of time making space for your kids.

But here's the thing is, some people in here are going through a divorce.

They're battling cancer, man.

They don't know if they want to live till tomorrow, and they need to hear every word

that's spoken in church.

And so what we have to do is police ourselves.

We have to check ourselves.

And so, ma'am, we love your kids, but we need to be aware at Sandals church of others.

Of others.

And it's just a reality.

We've forgotten that.

Anybody wait in line lately?

And you're the only person that knows there's a line.

Everybody else just kind of walks to the front, and that's when you completely forget that

you love Jesus.

Please don't have a sandal shirt on when you confront that person.

How about the movie theater?

Anybody been to the movies lately?

I can't stand it.

In a couple of weeks, I interview one of the movie directors in our church, and it's one

of the things I ask them all the time.

How are you going to continue to make movies and get people to come to the theater?

Because people are on their phones, people are talking with each other.

People are throwing skittles.

I mean, it's just a know, one time at church years ago, there was a woman on the front

row, and she had a kid with a rattle.

Does anybody have I do.

You know, and I'm just like I can't even hear the Holy Spirit, right?

And some of you guys know this story.

It was terrible.

I didn't know there was a news reporter in the audience that day.

I know, because I'm special.

And I said something in the middle of my sermon.

I'm like, can I help you?

Can I help you?

And it didn't go well, and I made the news for all the wrong reasons.

But here's the thing is, we're all oblivious to our surroundings, to other people, and

we're oblivious to ourselves.

Anybody realize how bad your breath really is when you wear the masks?

Remember that?

I was like, oh, Tammy has a know.

I understand.

But we've all met people with breath problems, body odor.

Anybody that amen work with youth.

Amen praying for you.

Love you.

Love you.

You know, when I was in boot camp this is a true story.

When I was in the army, when I was boot camp, our drill sergeant would make us raise our

hands and stand up like this.

And he would walk down a line sniffing our pits.

And he told us, if I smell one hint of body odor, he's like, you guys are going to run

till you puke.

And we puked a lot because some people it doesn't matter.

It's like, did you not hear him say scrub your pits?

And they didn't.

But here's the thing is, we live in a culture that's oblivious of God.

What is up, Sandals Church?

We are starting a new series today called Oblivious with Pastor Matt.

Before we jump into that, I wanted to take a brief moment to invite you to partner with

us.

You can do that by going to donate SC.

Now, let's get back into the message.

But here's the thing is, we live in a culture that's oblivious of God.

Oblivious of God.

Listen to what Romans 119 says.

It says they know the truth about God because he has made it obvious to them.

You ever met an atheist that's mad at God?

You wonder why that is?

Because they know he's there.

They know he's there.

People intrinsically know there's a God.

Now, they may have had a bad experience at church or a bad experience with Christians, or

they may be wrestling through some real sin issues, but they know there's a God because

it's obvious.

It's obvious.

Number one on your outlines, you can take notes on your phone.

And don't think that I'm going to judge you.

I want you to download the app.

I want you to take notes on your phone.

Just turn the volume down, okay?

Amen.

For the love of Jesus and all that is holy, there's a volume button.

Find it.

And if you can't find it, let one of your neighbors help you find it and turn it down.

So, number one, I want to challenge you to create a culture of truth with those that are

around you.

We live in a culture of lies, right?

Think of my favorite movie, the Elf.

You sit on a throne of lies.

Remember the fake Satan?

That's our fake Satan.

Fake Santa?

No judgment there.

The fake santa.

You sit on a throne of lies.

And that's what our culture does.

Our culture is not honest about anything.

Anything.

Listen to what the Book of Proverbs says.

This is God's book of wisdom to you.

Some of you were raised in homes where your dad didn't teach you anything, your mom didn't

tell you anything, and everything you learned on the streets, and you're finding out it's

all wrong.

Well, here's the good news.

Your father in heaven loves you, and he tells you the truth, and he tells you what you

need to know.

Proverbs 23 three.

Listens, buy the truth and do not sell it.

One of my favorite translations says it this way.

Buy the truth at any price and never sell it.

You see, one of the things that our culture is sold is the truth.

And this is why we struggle with basic, basic things in California.

Here's one of the lies.

We say we have a homeless problem.

No, we have a drug and mental illness problem.

Housing will not help people with addiction, and it will not help people with mental

illness.

We live in a culture that is immune to the truth.

We're allergic to the truth.

We blame anything and everything but the truth.

And so here's what many of you do.

You're like, well, that's why I'm leaving California.

Or you could create a culture of truth around yourselves.

And this is what I'm going to encourage you if you're raising kids.

Anybody raising kids, I'll be praying for you right now.

That's fun.

But when you're raising kids, it's tough.

You got to create a culture of truth.

And I always love parents who are like, my kid would never lie to me.

I'm like, I don't think you know your kid at all.

One of my good friends this week, they caught their kid on video.

On video sneaking into the fridge, and the kid moved the camera, went up to the camera and

moved it so his parents wouldn't see him get into the fridge.

Don't you love kid intelligence?

It's just like, you didn't think we were going to see this, but all kids lie.

All kids lie.

Your kids lie.

When I was a kid, I lied.

What's?

Hilarious.

During COVID My parents lied.

I'm like, Are you out?

Are you at the grocery store?

My mom's like, no.

I'm like, I got you on the tracker.

I know where you are, mom.

That's a fun phase of life.

But everybody lies.

Even in marriage, we lie to each other.

Did that hurt your feelings?

No.

Here's why we lie.

It's not because we want to lie.

It's because the truth has consequences.

It does.

And so what you have to do is one of my favorite movies years ago was Meet the Fockers,

the circle of Truth, the circle of Trust.

Remember one time we were talking with our son, and he's like, what about the circle of

trust?

I'm like, you're not in it.

We're in it.

You're over there.

And that's the thing, is, oftentimes we think people believe our lies, but people see the

truth in us a whole lot more than we give them credit for.

And some of you say, here's the thing in your marriage.

You know what's holding you back?

The truth.

Your relationship with your kids?

The truth.

You know what your problem is with your best friend or your lack of friends?

It's the truth.

And here's the thing is we're afraid to speak the truth because we don't want to risk

hurting the relationships or the people that we love.

But listen to what the Bible says about love.

In one Corinthians 13 six, love does not delight in evil listeners, but it rejoices with

the truth.

Man if you really love someone, if you really care for someone, don't you owe them the

truth?

A couple of years ago, Pastor Claude, he's one of our teaching pastors.

And I love Claude, but he's a big chicken.

He wanted to challenge me, and there were some things in my life that he saw, but he was

afraid to tell me.

And so we were out to coffee together.

And you ever have a friend, you go to coffee date, and they're just him and Han, and

they're not being honest, and you know something's coming, but you don't know what it is.

And so right at the end of our coffee date, he slides me this pamphlet.

You know you're in trouble when you get a pamphlet from a friend.

And the pamphlet is, it says, Struggling with Bitterness.

And he goes, hey, I just thought maybe you'd want to read this.

And he runs to his car, drops it off.

But here's the thing is, I know Claude loves me, and I know he didn't want to hurt me.

But here's what the Bible says.

Remember that book of Proverbs I told you about?

Proverbs 27.

Six wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses from an enemy.

Man, I hope you have friends like that that love you enough to tell you the truth.

And here's the thing is, most of our friends, when we tell them the truth, run away.

I want you to know that Claude and I are better friends today because he told me the

truth.

And I appreciate him, and I love him.

And I know it was hard for him, but he did it.

A wound from a sincere friend is better than kisses from an enemy.

Some of you have settled for kisses from your enemy.

This is why Jesus says you need the truth.

He says the truth will what set you free.

Man, I know some of you, you're embroiled in some real pain in your marriage, man.

You're struggling in a real relationship with your son or daughter.

Here's what I've learned.

The closer the relationship, the harder it is.

You know who I'm not worried about?

People I don't care about.

And I know as your pastor, I'm supposed to care about everybody.

I don't.

I mean, that's just the reality.

I care about the people that are close to me and the people that I know.

But here's the thing I've learned about relationships.

No one, not even God, can fix a dishonest relationship.

If you want God to answer your prayers for your marriage, answer God's prayer for the

truth in your relationship.

The best thing that could happen to your marriage today is if you could just be honest

about what the problem is.

The best thing that could happen in your struggle with your friendships, if you could just

say, hey, here's what's happening.

Here's the truth.

And the reason I think that that's hard for us as Christians is oftentimes we think we and

others are better than we really are.

Number two in a culture that's oblivious is we have to accept that everyone's a mess.

I don't care.

I don't care who your favorite pastor is.

I don't care who your favorite worship leader is.

I don't care who your favorite author is.

I have met probably all of them and they're a mess.

They're a total mess.

Just because someone can write well doesn't mean they're living well.

Just because somebody can speak well doesn't mean they are well.

Just because somebody can sing like Jesus doesn't mean they know Jesus.

A couple of weeks ago, I went to a retreat with a bunch of pastors, 13 pastors.

Why did I go?

My wife said I needed to go.

What's that about?

So I went and I was really unsure and I didn't know anybody.

Well, I knew one guy, but twelve of the other guys were complete strangers.

So we sat around a table and these pastors, these are leaders of churches.

These are people that you would love and respect and look to as an example of the kind of

person you want to be, the kind of marriage you want, an example to raise your kids in the

way that God would want.

And they went around the table and I got to speak last and I was like, everyone is a

disaster, total disaster.

There were guys that had committed adultery, that had been fired from their church.

There were guys struggling with mental illness.

There were guys that were ready to walk away from ministry.

There were guys that said they didn't like their spouse, like their kids.

And then there was one guy who said this three years ago on vacation, somebody offered him

a marijuana gummy and he said he doesn't know why, but he took it and it was laced with

something.

And instantly, three years ago, he went into a psychotic episode.

And he has been struggling listen to this to get out of it for three years.

His life is ruined, ministry is ruined, marriage is struggling, can't parent, and then he

shares he has night terrors in the middle of the night, he'll have these nightmares where

he thinks he's wrestling pirates and his wife has to call the police.

Anybody want to guess who my roommate was?

Oh, yeah.

That guy.

That guy.

330 in the morning, I was calling upon the name of Jesus because he was bigger than me, a

lot bigger.

And I would love to tell you how tough I am.

It's just not the truth.

If he thought I was the pirate, I was going down.

I was going down, and there was nothing to it.

And I didn't sleep, man.

I just was sitting there in my covers, like, oh, my gosh, where's Tammy?

She'd protect me.

But here's the thing.

You know what we do?

We judge people.

And I was sitting there praying.

I was praying two things god, why do you have me here?

These people are a mess.

God, why did Tammy send me here?

And this really just impressed upon me.

I think the older I get and the more successful I am, I have more control over the people

that I hang out.

Know, when you're first starting out, you gotta work wherever you work.

You gotta live wherever you live.

You have very little control of the people that you interact with.

And some of you are there right now, and I'm praying for you.

But the more successful you get, your crowd becomes smaller.

Like, I have the pleasure of working with Christian leaders at this church.

Like many of you at your job, you're the only Christian.

And so I'm blessed in many ways.

So I said, God, why do you want me here?

You see, I was oblivious to what God was obviously trying to do for me.

In the Book of Matthew, chapter nine, verse 35, jesus went through all of the cities and

villages, teaching in their synagogues, and proclaiming the gospel of the kingdom and

healing every disease and every affliction.

Can you imagine that?

Can you imagine?

Instead of a line outside of urgent care, there was a line in our church?

Because Jesus was here, and people are getting healed.

And then he looked at the crowds, and you know what?

They were a mess.

They were a mess.

Broken marriages, addictions, diseases, mental health issues, self righteousness religious

people.

People all about themselves.

When he saw the crowds listen to this, he had compassion for them.

Wow.

For they were harassed and helpless.

Listen.

It's like a sheep without a shepherd.

Now, let me tell you why this verse convicts me.

Do you know what a shepherd is?

A shepherd is translated in the Bible as pastor.

These were people without a pastor.

And then he said to his disciples, and I don't know if you're a disciple or not, but if

you are, I want you to listen to this.

He said, the harvest is plentiful.

I want you to think about all 14 of our campuses are in California.

Are people a mess in California.

It's worse here than it is anywhere else.

The harvest is plentiful.

What's the problem?

The laborers are few.

So what do we do?

We pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest.

Maybe the reason you're at that crafty job is there are people that God is trying to

harvest.

You know that kid that your friend is connecting with that you're really concerned about?

And you think that kid might be a bad influence on your kid.

I wonder if that bad kid is the harvest.

I wonder if that small group that you're in and those people that drive you crazy and

you're like, I don't even know if they're Christian.

What if they're not?

What if they're the harvest?

What do you think Jesus is really saying when he challenges you to pray about sending

harvesters into the field?

What do you think the answer to that prayer is?

For someone else to go or for you to go?

Look, if you've been hurt at Sandals Church, I'm sorry.

Church people are people.

We are just as broken on the inside as people are on the outside.

Sometimes at church, have you noticed this?

We're more broken.

It's just a reality.

It's just like when you go to a hospital, you notice there are more sick people there.

Do you know why they're there?

To get well.

Do you know why people come to church?

To get well.

Church people are people.

Anybody in here been hurt by a person at church in your life?

Raise your hands.

Look around.

I want you to know I've been hurt by church people.

Now, here's the worst part.

I have hurt people in the church.

Man, how sad is that?

How real is that?

I got into ministry to help people, and as a pastor, I have hurt people.

Now, if that shocks you, I want to apologize.

You've just never been to a church where pastor's been honest about that issue.

Our vision at Sandals Church is to be real.

The more successful Sandals has gotten, and I say this in love, the further we're drifting

from our vision.

And I see it.

I see it in our staff, I see it in our people, and I see it in myself.

Because you know what success forces many of us to do?

Pretend.

Pretend.

I was talking with my friend Darren, who's a Hollywood director, and he said, many

Hollywood actors come into the business as Christians.

They want to make a difference.

They want to be men and women of character.

I said what changes them.

You know what he said?

Success.

Oftentimes the very things we pray for are the enemies of our faith that God is calling us

to.

Very few people handle success well, and that includes myself.

So here's what I want to challenge us as a church.

The world is oblivious.

The world is oblivious.

How do we become a church that pays attention to what's obvious.

I want you to think for a second how you spell the word oblivious different from the word

obvious.

Now, I know if you went to public school like me, you're going to pass on this one.

But there are two letters that you remove li.

See?

How do you go from oblivious to obvious?

You take out listen to this the lie.

Come on, that'll preach.

It didn't land in here, but maybe it landed with you.

So let me ask you, what lie are you living?

Because we live in a culture of lies, and a lot of us can see that out there, but we don't

see how it's affected us in here.

Colossians.

313 make an allowance for each other's faults and forgive anyone who offends you.

Remember the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.

Man, I got a direct message on Instagram this week, and this is what it said.

My ex husband repented of his sins this week and gave his life to Christ and was baptized

at Sandals Church.

She said, as a Christian, do I have to forgive him?

Wow.

Well, let's replay that verse.

The answer is yes.

Wow.

Isn't that amazing?

Sometimes as soon as we give up on people, god just starts to work in those people.

Aren't you glad Jesus didn't give up on you?

Man, I'm so convicted by this.

We've got to remind ourselves that I have to give the grace to others that I've received

for myself.

The Book of corinthians.

Two corinthians ends with these words, and you don't have this on the screen, but Paul

says, may the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ and the love of God and the fellowship of the

Holy Spirit be with you all.

There's never been a more dysfunctional church in the history of the church than Corinth.

What holds them together?

Listen to this.

The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy

Spirit.

It's grace that centers us together.

It doesn't mean that we overlook sins.

It doesn't mean that we don't pretend there aren't sins.

It doesn't mean that we allow abuse in church.

But a lot of what offends us is just the faults in others, the mistakes in others.

And a lot of what you guys are fighting about and arguing about in your marriage is just

the faults of your spouse that you were blind to when you were super attracted.

As attraction goes down, awareness rises.

That's why when you're dating for, like, three days, you're like, they're perfect.

No, they're not.

They're not.

You just lack vision.

Okay, here's what we're going to challenge.

We're going to pivot here number three.

I want to challenge you this week to identify the obvious thing that you need to change.

So I was at that retreat.

God, why do you have me here?

Here's the obvious thing that I was oblivious to.

God needed to renew my compassion for people.

When's the last time you had a renewed compassion for people?

So many of you guys are on Fox News.

You're angry.

You're upset, and everything in our world is pushing us to divide and judge the other,

right?

Think about the conflict in Israel right now.

What's all in the news?

Who's killed more civilians?

It's back and forth on the news.

And that's the way a lot of us are.

Our personal lives are a lot like the Middle East, and we're just arguing about who's

killed more dreams, who's killed more values, who's killed more ideas, who kills more joy,

rather than saying, okay, Lord, what's the obvious thing that I'm doing?

So I'm going to challenge you this week.

Next week, we're going to look about how to rectify and heal disagreements.

So we're going to look at this verse from a different point of view next week.

But this week, I just want it to be about you.

Next week, it can be about you and others.

So here's what Jesus says in Luke 641 and 42.

It says, and why do you worry about the speck in your friend's eye?

Listen to this.

When you have a log in your own you want to know why people don't come to church when you

invite them?

Because they see this.

You want to know why people don't believe in your Jesus at work?

Because they see this.

You want to know why your kids think your faith is hypocritical and you don't really have

an authentic relationship with Jesus because your kids see this.

Jesus says, Why do you worry about the speck in your friend's eye when you have a log in

your own eye?

He says, how can you think of saying friend, let me help you get rid of that speck in your

eye when you can't see past the log in your own eye?

When I read these verses some 30 years ago, that's when I realized, you know what it means

to be a Christian.

We got to be real.

We got to be real.

Listen to these words with ourselves.

With ourselves.

Sandals Church is not a church made for church people.

My wife reminded me of this week.

She said, Sandals does not cater to Christians.

We reach the lost.

Because you know what?

Christians don't want to see this.

This.

You know how we can help our communities?

You know how we can help our families?

You know how we can help our friends?

By dealing with this.

Do you know how you deal with this?

You get real.

Do you know how many pastors have challenged me and said, I don't see being real in the

Bible?

I said, well, maybe there's something blocking your vision.

Preschool.

I've heard of pastors preaching against our vision.

Like, can you imagine starting a church to be unreal with yourself, God, and others?

We want to be as fake as possible.

You're like.

Somebody like I escaped that church.

But let me say that you know what lost?

People want to be real.

You know what religious people want?

A Christian cruise ship.

That's what they want, and that's what they run to.

And let me just ask you, if every Christian gets on a cruise ship, what happens to

California?

It just keeps sinking.

It just keeps sinking.

He says, when you can't see past the log in your own eye, jesus says, you hypocrite.

So why in our vision is real with self first?

People always ask me this.

Why isn't God first?

God is not the problem.

Come on, now.

That's right.

Listen to the words of Jesus.

First, get rid of the log in whose eye?

Your own eye.

You want to change your marriage?

Change yourself.

You want to change your kids?

Change yourself.

You want to improve this church?

Change yourself.

Start with yourself.

This is what Jesus is inviting us to.

Religion is all about these games and pretending and what we say and what we do.

But it's not about who we are.

Jesus is about who we are.

And then listen this.

Then he says, then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend's eye.

Can you imagine if you went to the hospital to have surgery?

And the doctor's like, I forgot my glasses today, but I'm trained.

That's what a bunch of Christians are running around doing.

We cannot see accurately, but we're pretending we can help others.

Here's the thing.

Do you know that it's obvious to others what you should change?

It's obvious, but I am often oblivious to what God wants me to change.

So we're going to end with this today.

What is the most obvious thing in your life that God wants you to work on?

Listen to this.

This week.

Like, if you've been Christian for a week, let me just ruin your future.

The sin struggle never goes away.

I always love when we meet young Christians.

I'm almost perfect.

Wait a little bit.

Wait a little bit.

Because here's the thing.

The longer you're a Christian, the Lord just shows you new levels.

New levels.

Some of you didn't know in your house there's a basement.

The Lord's like.

Oh, yeah.

Many, many.

And let me say this.

I love you.

But it's easy to get this wrong.

You ever met somebody that's working on the wrong thing?

Jesus says this in Matthew 23 24.

He says, you blind guides.

You strain your water so you won't accidentally swallow a knot.

A nat.

Anybody ever swallowed a nat?

I have.

I'm a cyclist.

Many a nat has met their maker in the back of my throat.

Anybody ever been in a party where some bug just flies right in your mouth and you can't

fake it?

Oh, the other day I was just swallow it.

It's protein.

I mean, we might as well get used to it, right?

They say hamburgers are going to be made out of bugs in the next 20 years.

Anyways, some of you at Burger King, this is the best beef I've ever had.

I ain't a beef.

That's a cockroach.

Unless, of course, you own a burger joint.

Love you.

Please, tithe.

He says, Listen, you strain your water so you won't accidentally swallow a GNAT, but you

swallow a camel.

You want to know how to fix your life?

Stop swallowing camels.

I follow this thing on Instagram.

It's called nature is metal.

It always amazes me when a snake will swallow something that's too big.

And do you know what it does?

Its appetite kills itself.

It swallows an elk or it swallows an alligator.

And you know what happens?

It bursts.

Here's what Jesus is saying.

When you focus on the wrong things.

We do this in our marriage.

We do this in our relationships.

We do this in our friendships.

We do this at church.

Like, think of all the complaints at church.

The music's too loud.

It's too dark.

Nat, nat, nat, nat, nat.

Meanwhile, Captain Camel, you just swallowed him.

What is the camel in your life?

And let me just run through a couple of things.

I know some of you struggle with addiction.

Those of you who struggle with addiction, I love you, but I had an addict come up to me

and he said, Pastor, would you pray for me?

I'm sure he's like, I need you to stop cussing.

I'm like, do you?

Is that what we need to be focusing on?

Let me say this.

If you are an addict, there is nothing in your life more important than sobriety.

That's the issue.

That's the thing.

That's the demon.

That's the thing.

That's the hill to die on.

You got to get sober.

Do you know how many times I've been doing marriage counseling?

And we don't even talk about somebody who's addicted?

Is that helpful to the therapist?

And you play and you pretend and you're not real.

Do you have an addiction?

That's the thing.

That's the thing to deal with.

That's the thing to manage.

How about this one?

Do you have a health issue?

I got this young man on staff, and I can't help but just say things out loud.

Pray for me.

I just say things out loud.

But I was sitting in a one on one meeting.

I'm like, what's wrong with your nose?

And he had a scab on his nose.

He's like, oh, yeah, he's I got a CPAP machine.

He says, My wife said I was dying in the middle of the night.

Do you know how many dudes in our church die every night, but they won't go to the

hospital?

Get a CPAP, Machine.

I'm just trusting Jesus.

Jesus like, no, you're going to meet me in a second if you don't get a machine.

Like, some of you dudes every night, you're like, fix that.

That's why you're a grump.

That's why you're a bad dad.

That's why you're terrible at work.

That's why you're sleeping through this message, because you haven't slept in a year.

Get the machine.

And I know it looks like alien, but live with it.

Why are we so oblivious as Christians?

For some of you, it's your attitude.

I don't like your sermon.

Why?

I don't like your attitude.

Listen to me.

A critical spirit is not the Holy Spirit.

A friend of mine said he found out there was a woman in his church who wrote him letters.

She attends six local churches.

It's her ministry.

You know what I told him?

Tell her to go serve God somewhere else.

Because you know what she does?

She would write all the things he did wrong.

I was like, man, and he's like, I'm going to send her to Sandals.

I said, please don't.

Please don't.

And then for some of you, it's an idol.

It's something you've placed against God.

I was having a conversation.

A lot of people think I don't care about sports.

It's not that I don't care about sports.

I used to worship sports, and I couldn't manage it.

You know, just like some of you, you can't just have a glass of alcohol.

There are just some people you just can't.

I'm a person that just can't care about sports.

I don't sport in moderation.

I lose my mind.

I remember my little girls weeping as I would watch a football game.

What's wrong with you guys?

And they're like, Dad's the devil.

Then I would be depressed and angry, and I didn't even get paid.

I never got a check from the 49 ers of the Lakers.

Not even one check.

Never.

They don't even give me VIP seats.

How about this?

Is there a feeling that you're working through?

Man feelings are powerful, but they're often wrong.

Maybe you're overwhelmed with anger.

That's the thing.

Maybe you're like me and it's bitterness and you need Claude to slide you a pamphlet.

A lot of people, it's fear.

Fear.

I prayed with a woman last week at church who's so overwhelmed with anxiety, she left her

husband.

I was like, well, what did he do?

Nothing.

That's just what anxiety does.

Anxiety will get you to the place where you trust no one.

And then depression.

Depression.

I had a guy in my small group that was so depressed, I said, if you don't go to a

counselor this week, we're going to do an intervention.

For some of you, it's a broken relationship.

I got convicted about that this week.

I just texted somebody, said, hey, I'm sorry for how I handled this situation.

Please forgive me.

How about this one?

Stress.

Anybody?

You can answer this one.

Anybody?

Stress?

Here's the thing I've learned.

The older I've gotten, the worse I am at stress, man.

When I was younger, I slept great.

And now I just sit there at night.

I'm like, oh, yeah, I'm messing up.

Maybe it's a lack of grace for others.

Listen to me.

What's the most important thing in your life this week that you're oblivious to, that God

wants you to work on?

And ask God to reveal it?

Ask God in just a second, you can ask God.

And if you hear nothing, ask someone that knows you and that you trust, and that's scary.

Scary.

But here's the thing.

Don't ask somebody if you're going to judge them for what they say, because that's why the

people that love you aren't honest with you.

So ask God to reveal it.

If you get nothing, ask someone that knows you and loves you.

And if it's a sin, repent of it.

Say, lord, I got to stop this.

Next.

This is huge.

You want to know why you don't change?

James 516 confess your sins to one another so that you may be whole and healed.

Share it with your small group.

If you're not in a small group, maybe that's the one thing.

Maybe that's the one thing.

And then here's the thing.

Work on it every day like your life matters.

Work on it every day like you could take your life.

This week.

I was at a restaurant, and I ran to an old friend.

He said, hey, Pastor Matt.

And you ever run into somebody, you don't remember them?

That happens to me all the time.

Like you came to Sandals once in 1998, and you expect me to remember you?

Sorry, I don't.

And I looked at him.

I looked at him and I went, devlin.

And I saw right in.

And here's the thing.

He was really big, and I'm not that big.

Sorry, Devlin.

But he was bigger, and he lost all kinds of weight.

And I said, what have you done?

You know what he said?

He said, I just made a change.

He said, I started to make little changes every day and every week, and just kept adding

to those changes.

And he said, before you know it, I was a different person.

So here's the thing.

Whatever the Lord reveals, work on it this week.

And guess what?

If it's still a problem next week, guess what you do?

You repeat it.

This is how God changes us.

This is how God changes us when we begin to work on the obvious, on the obvious, let me

pray for you.

Heavenly Father, I pray right now that you would reveal what this one thing is.

And here's the thing, lord.

It's going to be different for every single person present in this place, every single

person listening to this message.

Holy Spirit, would you supernaturally reveal to us what's that one thing that I am

oblivious to that is obviously a challenge for my life?

Father, would you give us the courage to share it with somebody else?

And would you give us the strength to work on it this week?

We pray in Jesus name amen.