The Power of Community | Part II - Leaders' Talks

Hey, I'm Pastor Steve Hole.

I want to empower you today to walk in your true identity as a worshiper and warrior.

Embrace the power of God's Word and the Holy Spirit.

Today be encouraged with a word from my guest speaker.

Welcome to the Born for War podcast.

Does anyone remember me speaking ever?

Oh, good.

Four people.

Great.

No.

Oh, there's three more on this side.

So seven people remember about a year and a half ago, I had the privilege of speaking to you about the power of community.

And today we're gonna continue that conversation.

And I've really um I'm really calling this talk Better Together and the Power of Community Part 2.

Before we go any further, though, let's pray.

So, Father, we come to you right now.

We ask you, Father God, for fresh fire to fall on each one of us.

We ask you for goodness and mercy to follow hard after us, Father.

Give us ears, Father, to hear what you have for us this morning.

Give us a seeing eye, God.

And then give us the grace to be able to join you in your activity right now.

In Jesus' name.

Amen.

You know the world is filled with such loneliness, such isolation.

Recently, Denise and I were at the gym, and we saw what we always see.

You know, people with headphones on, engrossed in what they're doing, nobody even talking to each other.

You know, that repeats in almost every restaurant in town, every coffee shop in town.

I've seen families, all maybe four or five people all plugged into their own devices, sitting together at a table, and missing the opportunity to connect, missing the opportunity for relationship.

We may have hundreds of friends on Facebook, but are they really our friends?

Even within a growing church like ours, and this is a place that's designed for connection.

It's designed to be in community.

But even here, it's so easy to feel adrift or disconnected, right, from each other.

And I think despite all that, it's important to recognize that's not God's best for our lives.

That's not his plan for us.

There's he wired us with a longing to belong to others, with a longing to connect with others, right?

To have meaningful connections in healthy relationships.

You know, in the book of Genesis, during creation, God said many, many different times, it is good, it is good, it is good, right?

He kept saying, blessing his creation, saying it's good.

Then we get to Genesis chapter 2, and the first time he says, it is not good for man to be alone.

Genesis 2 · chapter mention

Psalm 68, verse 6 says, God sets the lonely in families.

Psalms 68:6

The word lonely in the original language here means solitary, isolated, friendless, or desolate.

Now, if we were truly honest this morning, and I won't ask for a show of hands, every one of us has felt that way at times.

Maybe right now you're feeling that way.

People all around you, great songs, great worship, but your heart's breaking and you feel alone.

But I believe that God, the call of that verse, He sets the lonely in families, is for us to come home.

It's for us to be part of community.

It's for us to be part of something that's bigger than we are.

If you could turn with me to Ecclesiastes chapter 4, that's gonna be our text that we're gonna launch from this morning.

Ecclesiastes 4 · chapter mention

And I'm gonna read verses 9 through 12.

It says, Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor.

If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.

But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.

Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.

But how can one keep warm alone?

Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves, and a cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

The word better in this verse, in the original language, means beautiful.

It means beneficial.

It means the best.

It means cheerful and it means festive.

See, we're better together.

We're stronger together.

We're supported together.

Life makes sense together.

Together, the celebrations and the joys of life are so much richer, aren't they?

And together we're much better at navigating the tough times, which come to all of us.

Proverbs 27, verse 17.

Proverbs 27:17

The Bible says that iron sharpens iron.

In community, we sharpen each other.

We learn how to encourage, how to prefer, how to value, how to esteem those around us.

We learn how to celebrate the treasure in another person while not stumbling over their imperfections, right?

We learn how to forgive.

We learn how to reconcile.

Maybe when we're wronged, or maybe we've wronged someone else.

Well, where else are we going to learn these things?

These very, very important things.

We learn how to humble ourselves and put another person's needs above our own.

See, I don't believe we can become all that God intends us to become without the power of community.

You know, if you guys really think about it, the most effective discipleship, the most effective equipping for our lives happens either one-on-one or in the context of a small group.

It doesn't happen on Sunday mornings.

Look, I love Sunday morning.

I love coming together.

I love hearing a good message.

I love worshiping God.

I love seeing everybody in the lobby.

But there's a big difference between that and having genuine fellowship one with another.

And that's the longing that's in every single one of our hearts.

Let me share a testimony from one of our community groups.

It's so easy to feel unknown, unsupported, and alone.

Even when you're in a place you like, surrounded by lots of people.

Our community group has shared God's love in ways that have helped ease the feelings that come with being unknown or unseen.

We are experiencing a deep sense of belonging and acceptance as we vulnerably share our lives with each other.

As we meet together, we are becoming more familiar with the kindness and the mercy of God.

Even with our imperfections, we give each other biblical counsel and encouragement in our trials.

We laugh and we have fun every time we meet.

We see a little of God's love and joy for us through the words and the actions of human friendship.

2 Corinthians chapter 1, verse 4 says, He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others.

2 Corinthians 1:4

When they're troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.

Part of living on planet earth includes going through difficulties and suffering.

But as believers, what separates us from the world is we get to experience His comfort in the midst of those times.

And then, on top of that, the cherry on top, we get to share that same comfort with each other.

That is awesome to me.

Let me share another testimony.

Our community group has been a life-altering experience for my wife and me.

Amid the challenges of parenthood and job changes, it became our refuge.

We evolved from acquaintances to cherished friends, bound by shared struggles and triumphs.

Our fellowship with others even fortified our relationship as a married couple.

We faced challenges united, closer than ever.

Our activities, hiking, camping, meals, knit us together with joy and shared moments.

Support ran deep from house projects to crisis times.

During our darkest hours, our group's unwavering support and comfort helped us guide our son through two suicide attempts, showcasing the power of human connection.

Our group's spiritual growth was equally remarkable.

Men deepen their relationships with God, transforming simple hikes into profound prayer moments.

The journey has woven an unbreakable tapestry of connection, support, and faith, an ongoing source of strength and inspiration.

Hebrews chapter 10, verses 24 and 25.

Hebrews 10:24

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together a summer in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another and all the more as you see the day approaching.

One of God's most precious gifts to us are friends who encourage us and lovingly challenge us to keep going, right?

Here's how one community group at the road lived this out.

A woman in our group was living in a horrific situation in which the lady upstairs made unbearable noise all night long.

Our dear sister could get no sleep, and it was tearing her down to exhaustion.

Being a single woman without a job, tied to a lease with an unresponsive landlord, she had no options for a solution.

We prayed and prayed together as a group.

Then a relative out east invited her to move into a small apartment attached to their house.

After more prayer, she decided to make the move.

Our group worked hard to help her pack up and load a U-Haul.

One of our guys then drove the truck for three days across country to get her moved.

At the going-away party, each of us wrote on a four by six card and read aloud to her what we appreciate about her.

Love flowed, many tears were shed as we sent her off into God's next adventure for her.

The highlight of our group are the rich times we've had in prayer when we've seen God do what only He can do.

He works and He answers our prayers in huge ways.

Paul speaking at the end of his third missionary journey to the elders he called for to come to him at Ephesus, said in Acts chapter 20, verse 20, You know that I have not hesitated to preach anything that would be helpful to you, but have taught you publicly and from house to house.

Acts 20:20

Community groups are God's idea.

They're his plan to accomplish his purposes.

Early New Testament believers used all kinds of venues to preach, to teach, and to evangelize.

They used temple courts, synagogues, marketplaces, government buildings, the countryside.

And the Apostle Paul, on his third missionary journey, rented a lecture hall in Ephesus for two years.

But the predominant way that early church believers had fellowship was in small groups, meeting from house to house.

It was rare that a small group was more than 15 or 20 people at the most simply because houses were so small in that day.

When a group got to a size bigger than that, they multiplied and formed another house church.

This is the way they did it in the early church.

In fact, there were very few church buildings that were even built before 313 AD.

Does anyone know what that date is?

History buffs?

That was the year that Constantine legalized Christianity with the Edict of Milan.

But in every century, from the book of Acts to today, the present, the predominant way that believers have true fellowship is meeting from house to house.

When persecution came, the model for house churches was already established.

I just recently listened to a podcast of an underground church leader in China, and he reported that despite death threats and imprisonment, and those things are real.

In fact, they train their leaders how to go to jail.

You know, we have courses on finding your destiny.

They train their people how to go to jail, how to suffer for Christ, how to give up your life when it's necessary.

Yet they meet together for the sake of the gospel at great risk.

They recruit leaders at great risk.

They advance the kingdom.

They even evangelize in the midst of government efforts to shut them down.

So meeting from house to house is not just for the persecuted church.

I believe that real transformation, genuine healing, positive, constructive change, and powerful equipping happens most effectively in the context of one-on-one relationships and small groups meeting from house to house.

And that real transformation is always characterized by four things.

It's characterized by safety, and that's emotional safety.

It's characterized by attachment or connection, and it's characterized by joy, and it's characterized by love.

And what those four things describe are a genuine community of blood-stained allies.

Let me share another testimony.

My wife and I joined our community group in 2022.

It's been a great blessing to us.

We meet usually twice a month for dinner, fellowship, devotions, prayer, sometimes holy communion, at one of our rotating homes.

What we love most about our group is the undeniable love we all have for Jesus.

We run after God together with our whole hearts, using the Word of God and the presence of the Holy Spirit to guide us.

We've grown to love each other as brothers and sisters, true bloodstained allies.

We would do anything for each other.

We laugh, we cry, we pray, and through it all we have joy.

It's clear that we all love our children and grandchildren beyond measure, and they are the focus of much of our prayer.

God answers our prayer in amazing ways.

And then they go on to share a recent experience.

We recently prayed for one of our members whose adult daughter told her that same day that she wanted nothing to do with her.

Our prayers ended at 11 p.m.

and at 2.30 a.m., three and a half hours later, her daughter called, crying, and said, I miss my mom.

I don't want to be untethered from the past.

Can you let me have another chance?

Can we please try to talk?

This was the daughter that rejected her mom three and a half hours earlier.

But when we surround each other in war, God is amazingly answering so many prayers right now.

It's absolutely amazing what happens.

He goes on to write, we know more about each other's struggles than most of our families.

We walk each other through the tough stuff.

What happens in the group stays within the group.

We have become family, beloved family.

Praise God, who is the author of relationship through Jesus Christ.

Some of you in this room are struggling right now with broken relationships.

Maybe it's a prodigal child.

Maybe it's a spouse.

Maybe it's a parent.

Maybe it's an extended family member.

Maybe it's another believer in the body of Christ.

And one of the things that God is doing right now in our midst, He's sending the spirit and the power of Elijah.

If you go to Matthew chapter 4, verses 5 and 6, you don't have to turn there.

Matthew 4:5

But what it says is, Behold, I send you Elijah before the great and terrible day of the Lord.

And this is what the spirit of Elijah was to do: turn the hearts of fathers to children.

Turn the hearts of children to fathers.

See, the spirit of Elijah is a forerunner anointing.

It's the same spirit we're told in the New Testament that was on John the Baptist, whose role was to prepare the way for something God was doing.

Well, God is doing something new in our midst right now.

And the precursor to that, he wants relationships healed.

He wants restoration, guys.

And so when we pray together, when we humble ourselves, when we repent, when we call out to God, we give the Holy Spirit the possibility of reconciliation.

There's no guarantees in any of that, guys.

But there is definitely an exhortation for us as believers to be the ones that take the step for reconciliation.

We take the Step to repent where we've hurt somebody.

That's what God is requiring of us, and we do that best in community together.

That's why it's so important right now.

Pastor Steve has said the road at Chapel Hills is on a road less traveled.

We're not building a church that looks or feels like any other church.

I want the road to be a word and spirit church where people feel loved, cared for, and equipped.

Our community groups are a key part of that journey.

So if you could turn now with me to Acts chapter 2.

Acts 2 · chapter mention

We're only going to read one verse, but it's a pivotal verse for us at our church.

Acts chapter 2, verse 42.

Acts 2:42

They devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching, to fellowship, to the breaking of bread, and to prayer.

We have built our community groups here at the road on these four pillars.

The first is the apostles' teaching.

That's our plumb line for life.

That's the word of God.

Okay?

And it might be going deeper with a Sunday sermon.

Let me give you an example.

This message today will be posted in video form on our website, and there are message notes that I have developed for this message along with five questions for discussion.

You could take that, download it off our website, and discuss it around the dinner table tonight to go deeper.

You can take that in your small groups and go deeper to figure out the sense of what it means for us.

See, the apostle's doctrine is applying his truth to our lives so we can live in a way that's pleasing to him.

The Greek word here for teaching is the word decay.

And that's an interesting word.

It means sound doctrine or moral instruction on how to live.

So we're going to give you a lot of ideas, we're going to give you principles, we're going to give you scripture, but what does it mean for you guys?

What does it mean for me?

We work that out together.

How do I walk out?

You know, another way to say it is in Ephesians: how do I work out my own salvation with fear and trebling?

We do it together.

We talk about what it looks like together.

How do we do these things?

The second, oh, one of our leaders shares, in small groups, we get to live out the truth as blood-stained allies and watch our kids grow up together.

Our second pillar is fellowship.

The Greek word here is koinania, which means partnership, shared vision, community.

And I love this last meaning.

It means belonging.

That's what the hole in our hearts is all about.

We need to belong and be connected with each other.

That's sharing each other's company, sharing life, bearing burdens, spurring each other on to love and good works.

And I found that there are four characteristics of bloodstained allies that I see in our groups here at the road.

And by the way, there's a question, a discussion question in the message notes on our website that actually asks about this.

How do we walk this stuff out?

The first characteristic that I see is that bloodstained allies listen well.

They listen for understanding.

They're not listening, figuring out what they're going to say, right?

We're fully present.

We give each other the gift of significance together.

We're fully intentional and engaged with each other.

We ask questions to clarify, to better understand.

Sometimes we share back.

This is what I hear you saying.

Is this what you're really saying?

Bloodstained allies do that, guys.

The second thing bloodstained allies do is they acknowledge emotions.

Now I didn't say validate emotions.

Let me give you an example.

Somebody really hurts you, and you share all that pain with someone and they respond back.

Oh man, no wonder they are so rotten.

Those guys are so bad.

They wronged you so bad.

Leave that for the country Western songs.

And let's do things that God wants us to do.

We have to acknowledge emotions.

We don't want to gloss over it.

They're real.

You might be feeling shame or discouragement or disappointment or hopelessness or whatever.

Those are emotions that need to be acknowledged.

But here's what bloodstained allies do.

We don't leave people there.

We speak the truth in love.

Okay?

That's what makes us different than the guys that go to the moose lodge, okay?

Or the guy sitting at a bar sharing how horrible they've been wronged.

And the other person sharing, oh yeah, you've been wronged.

No, we speak the truth in love.

Now, when I was a young believer, one day I went to church.

It was a Sunday morning, and there was a brother there that I looked up to that was older in the Lord.

And he asked me the question, Jerry, how are you doing today?

And I said, Boy, I am really hurting and depressed right now.

I don't know which end is up.

And his immediate response to me was Philippians 4:4, brother.

Philippians 4:4

Rejoice in the Lord.

Get into it.

What's wrong with you?

He didn't say what's wrong with you, but he meant it.

Well, you know what that did for me?

It's kind of like a root canal without Novakane.

But the bigger thing that it did to me is it taught me something that I had to unlearn.

That I sure can't share what I'm really going through.

Because I'm going to get a scripture verse crammed down my throat.

I'm going to get a platitude.

I'm going to get a buck up by your bootstraps, guy.

What's wrong with you?

And so I went silent.

And I suffered alone for a long time.

Bloodstained allies don't leave us there or let us be there.

We speak the truth in love.

And see, here's a good example.

So there's a question in your message notes about this.

What you want to talk about in your small groups around your dinner table with your families are how do we do this?

How does it look?

How do I speak truth in love to you?

What would that look like?

Because I don't want to compromise truth.

Remember what Jesus said.

It's truth, the truth, that what makes you free.

So we've got to be people that care more about the person in front of us than whether or not they're going to like us.

We have to dare to be able to speak truth, guys, to each other in love.

And there's one other thing, I think, a fourth thing that bloodstained allies do.

They help walk others to freedom and maturity.

We don't just leave people there.

We don't do a bless me prayer that gives them an instant of relief.

We walk with people.

We walk with people to freedom.

That's huge for all of us, guys.

It's what we need to all be about.

And I want to share one more testimony here.

Even though we've only walked with our group for a little over a year, they have become an integral part of our closest family.

We have shared life celebrations, weddings, birthdays, etc., and have had opportunities to blend extended family and lifetime friends into our gatherings.

Our community group, which has now become our family, is at the forefront of our minds in both celebration and crisis.

And they are in a position where only a very few and trusted people were previously allowed.

The third pillar of community groups here at the road is the breaking of bread.

The word bread in the Greek in this verse is the word artos.

And what that literally means, if you track that word through the New Testament, it was being used for communion, holy communion, as well as for sharing a meal together.

So I really believe that we have an opportunity in communion to see God move in a way, and we need to seize that opportunity.

The fourth pillar is prayer.

It's probably the most important part of our community group gatherings when we war one for another and see God's kingdom come in ways it wouldn't come otherwise.

So Dietrich Bonhoeffer said, the more genuine and deeper our community becomes, the more will everything else between us recede.

The more clearly and purely will Jesus Christ and his work become the one and only thing that's vital between us.

We commissioned 11 new leaders today.

We have 28 groups that still may have space for you to join, but space is really limited.

Groups are filling up right now.

Our goal is for every one of you that calls the road home to be part of a vibrant community group.

One of our leaders recently shared a dream she had with me that was actually multiple dreams.

She saw in the dream a huge influx of people needing discipleship in the near future.

She became aware of our need to prepare for large groups of people who know nothing of God or the gospel.

She saw lines of people waiting to get baptized.

She saw a desperate need for more homes, more community groups to accommodate this.

God may be calling some of you right now to consider leading a group.

It's not great ability that God is looking for.

So what I'm asking you, in addition to going out in the tables after we worship today, I'm asking you to consider stepping up and to lead in a community group here at the road.

Our next training is on Saturday, November 4th.

And you can sign up actually right now on the events page of the ROADS website.

Thank you for listening to the Born for War podcast.

We hope today's message has empowered you to make a difference in your world.

To connect with Pastor Steve's sermons, books, and blog, visit Steve Holtonline.org.

God bless.