"Not Even a Whisper" Ephesians 5:4-6 Sunday Morning Worship Service

Ephesians 5, verses 4 through 6.

Ephesians 5:4–6

This morning we're only going to be looking at verses 4 and 6.

Last week we looked at verses 3 and 5 because they went together there.

So this morning, verses 4 and 6.

I'm going to read verses 4 through 6, though, to uh so you get the full flow of Paul's thought here.

He says in verse 4, let there be no filthiness, nor foolish talk, nor crude joking which are out of place.

But instead let there be thanksgiving.

For you may be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous or an idolater, has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ in God.

Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things, the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience.

The tongue represents you in a very unusual way.

The tongue is a window into who you are in your heart.

The tongue reveals what is really going on in your mind and in your affections in a way that few other sins do.

You could say it this way: your tongue is a tattletale.

Having three children of my own.

I know what a tattletale is.

They rotate through the rolls, the three of them do.

We're in a new phase of life where they're old enough that sometimes they even tattle on me.

Mommy will come home and they will report something that happened when she was away.

Something that I did not do, but they did, but it is reported to mommy in a way that impugns my parenting ability.

That's what a tattletale is.

Your tongue is a tattletale.

Only it's not tattling on other people.

Your tongue is tattling on you.

Your tongue waits until you have your closest friends around you, sometimes even strangers.

And it jumps at the opportunity to report to them what you are really like.

And it doesn't even do so in a flattering way.

It does so in a very crafty way, so much so that you often aren't even aware of it, although the people around you are most certainly aware of it.

You aren't aware of how transparent your tongue really is.

You aren't aware of how much it's revealing about your hearts and about your minds.

You think it's more careful than that, but oh no, it is not.

And everybody around you sees it.

There are some sins that you're not able to commit because you're not strong enough.

But your tongue is not restrained.

There's some sins you might not commit because the person you would sin against is too weak and you don't want to, you know, push them around or rob them.

You're too much of a lady, you're too much of a gentleman to, you know, sin against that weak person over there.

But your tongue is not constrained.

Your son, your tongue will tear that person down.

There's some sins you might not commit because you don't have an opportunity to.

But your tongue has an opportunity for every kind of evil.

There are some sins you might not commit because you don't want to go to jail.

But your tongue does not fear jail.

Your tongue will sin in any way it wants to because it reveals whatever desire is in your heart.

In Ephesians 5 here, the mandate is that you walk in love.

You walk like Christ, you walk in love.

It's noteworthy that the two prohibitions we encounter here, the two things you're not supposed to do.

Paul has spent three chapters of rich theology, a fourth chapter of kind of practical theology in Ephesians 4 of building up the church, and he's told you not to walk like the Gentiles in chapter 4 and chapter 5, to walk in love, to walk in holiness.

You're supposed to affirmatively walk like Jesus Christ did, and then he gives you two negatives.

The first we looked at last week.

Don't commit sexual immorality, don't let it even be named among you.

And the second is watch your speech.

Now those seem disconnected.

They seem like two random rebukes.

How do they intersect and why are they interwoven?

You notice we looked at verses three and five last week, four and six this week.

We're not just hopscotching through scripture here.

These two sins are woven together in Paul's description of them, and I chose to separate them so we can focus on each individually, but I want you to first understand how they are connected.

They both reveal the real you.

And that's how even people justify sexual immorality.

They say, that's who I really am, that's what I really desire.

It's it sexual immorality exposes you in a way that no other sin does.

And so it really reveals what's going on in your heart.

The same thing is true with your speech.

Your speech is a window into the recesses of your heart.

And so as you speak, people can gaze at what's really going on inside.

They can see you as you really are.

And this is why I say not every sin is like that.

I mean, some sins you just simply can't do.

There are people that are too big for you to beat up, but your tongue can tear them down.

There are two people too weak that you wouldn't dream of abusing them, but your tongue will do it.

You think of a wife who feels like she cannot get her husband's attention.

And so she'll say increasingly and increasingly hurtful things until she finally lands her blow, until she finally gets his attention.

It's not even the things that are true.

They're just designed to hurt and to harm.

So he'll say increasingly hurtful and hurtful things in order to finally receive the desired outcome, to finally alter her behavior.

You're willing to sin in order to accomplish what you don't feel like you could achieve through normal means.

This is why Scripture describes the tongue variously as wicked, deceitful, perverse, filthy, corrupt, flattering, slanderous, gossiping, blasphemous, foolish, boasting, complaining, cursing, contentious, sensual, and vile.

And that is only a selective list.

It is no wonder that God put your tongue in a cage behind white bars.

You gotta lock that thing away.

Once sin entered the world, the first sin really committed was Adam blaspheming with his mouth, blaming the Lord for sin in the world, saying, It was the wife that you gave me, Eve blasphemed against God by saying it was the serpent, blaming God for letting the serpent into the garden.

Everybody blaming other people.

Proverbs 18, verse 21 says, Death and life are in the power of the tongue.

Proverbs 18:21

The tongue has the capacity to kill, but the flip side of Proverbs 18, 21 is that the tongue also has capacity to give life.

I mean, this is how powerful speech is.

At a theological level, the most basic dilemma in all of theology is how you reason from the world in which we live to God as he really is.

You understand that God is exalted, he is perfect, he is simple, he doesn't change, he only acts, he's never acted upon, he doesn't have the capacity to act, he's just pure action.

He's incomprehensible to us.

He's so far above us and beyond us, we cannot even conceive of him.

And yet he reveals himself in this world, which he made, and he interacts with us in this world, and he hears our prayers, and he acts in response to them, and he interacts with his creation.

How can you reason from this small, finite, fallen world to the infinite, incomprehensible God?

And it's worth looking.

How did God get from how incomprehensible he is into our world so we can understand him?

Well, he did so by speaking.

He created the world with his voice.

He spoke the universe into existence.

And then he reveals himself to us through words.

He gives his word to us in the form of this book.

So much so that when Jesus himself comes to earth, Jesus is called the Word of God, the Word that became flesh and made its dwelling among us.

And I don't want you to overlook how significant that is.

That there's no way for God to reveal himself to us.

We're not like him.

There's no way for him to reveal himself to us.

There's no way we could receive him or perceive him unless he spoke.

He has to have something from inside of him leave him to us that reveals himself to us.

So God makes the world with a word.

He reveals himself through his word, and he comes to us in his word.

In fact, his word reveals himself.

So this is the basic principle of Jesus, is the word of God, that when God has a thought in his head, that thought is his word that comes out.

And the word exactly and perfectly represents the speaker.

The word of Jesus is exactly who the Father is.

It is the self-perception of the Father.

He's the image of God because He's the Word of God.

He comes from Him and He does so perfectly.

He is the so much so Jesus can say, if you've seen me, you've seen the Father.

If you've seen the Word of God, you know what's in the Father's mind about himself.

He's the revelation of God.

That's what it means that Jesus is the Word of God.

That's, I think, some deep theology there, but if you understand it, you are ready now for the contrast to you.

Your word also reveals who you are in a way that you're not even fully aware of.

Your word leaves you and shows the world what you are really like.

God doesn't make speech evil.

In fact, God reveals himself through speech, but we make speech evil through sin.

This is why death and life are both in the power of the tongue.

2 Corinthians 6, verse 7 says the tongue is a weapon that can be used for righteousness' sake when it is presented to God.

2 Corinthians 6:7

That your tongue and your speech can be used to advance the gospel in the world.

Just like Jesus is the Word of God and God, the Father, speaks into the world, he reveals himself, you also can speak into the world life, and you can speak into the world righteousness, and you can advance the gospel in the world through your speech when your heart is transformed.

But apart from a transformed heart, your speech will be ugly and sinful and vile.

This is why it's connected back to sexual immorality.

The two are interwoven in your heart, revealing you as you really are.

This passage gives you some instructions on your speech.

The first instruction it gives is helpfully, shut your mouth.

I want to give you a very clear outline this morning.

Shut your mouth.

Verse 4, let there be, and in Greek the phrase, let there be is supplied.

It's not in the Greek.

There's no verb in the Greek.

It's just no filthiness, no foolish talking, no crude joking.

Here's a list of things you're not allowed to have.

The implication would be don't permit these, just like you would not allow sexual immorality or impurity or covetousness in verse 3 to even be named among you, borrowing that, borrowing that verb from verse 3.

Don't let these things be named.

Borrowing that verb, do not let this kind of speech even be named among you.

Don't have any hint of it.

Close your mouth to it.

If your mouth reveals who you are, and you are a new creature in Christ, then your speech should not be flavored like the dead you.

Your speech shouldn't have the scent of death in it because you're not dead anymore.

Of course, non-Christians are going to speak with filthiness and coarse jesting and idle talk because they don't have a new nature.

But for somebody with a new nature, they should speak differently.

And Paul's not just content to say, hey, watch your mouth.

He's going to give you a couple particular kinds of speech to avoid.

And he begins with, Let there be no filthiness.

The word filthiness there, it's really just the word for ugly.

Don't speak in an ugly way.

Don't speak in a defiled way.

This is a very unusual word in the Old Testament.

This is the word that's used to translate the Old Testament back in Genesis.

The only use of it in the Old Testament is for the cows in Pharaoh's dream.

Remember Pharaoh had a dream about cows?

And they were ugly cows?

Skinny, grotesque cows that came out of the river.

They were so disturbing was the sight of these cows in Pharaoh's dream that he needed help.

He summons magicians and everybody.

He needs help sorting out how ugly these cows are.

This is that word.

Only it's not about a cow here, it's about your speech.

Some of you have speech that is ugly and defiling and alarming to those that see it.

This is a common word outside of the Bible.

In the Greek world, this is a common word that's usually used to describe a child who brings shame onto his family.

The kid who grows up and leads an immoral life brings shame onto his family.

That's this word.

It's also used in the Greek world for kids that have some kind of deformity, or they didn't have this concept, but a genetic abnormality.

And the idea is that a child like that would bring shame onto his, you know, his more wealthy family would be ashamed of that child.

The Greeks weren't, I mean, they would sometimes even kill kids like that.

Barbaric.

But they had a word for it, and that that's the word that's used here.

It's a shameful thing.

It's just disgraceful in their mind.

That's the word that Paul borrows here to describe your speech can be like that.

Your speech can bring shame on you.

And often you don't realize it.

That's openly shameful speech.

I mean, what is openly shameful speech?

You can think of examples.

I mean, gossip is the easiest example because gossip is the one Christians are best at, you know?

Involve the wrong kinds of speech.

Christians excel at gossip.

I remember reading Jerry Bridge's book, Respectable Sins, which is a book I commend to you.

It's a great book.

He has a little anecdote in there that has stuck with me.

You know, he's a best-selling Christian author.

He's always writing a book.

That guy writes a book every few years, and they're great books.

And he said, for the years that he was working on writing this book, Respectable Sins, people would ask him, you know, at parties or at church or, you know, at the grocery store or wherever, people would ask him, What are you working on right now?

And he would say, I'm writing a book on respectable sins.

And he says, every Christian he told that to would always answer the same way.

Oh, you mean like gossip?

I mean, that is a window into what is tolerated in the church more than anything else.

You think of respectable sins, and you're like, gossip.

We're so good at that as Christians.

Why are Christians so good at gossip?

Because we're so good at praying.

Have you noticed the connection?

Like, oh, I shouldn't talk about this.

It's not your business to know about.

It's not my business to know about.

But I have to tell you so that you can pray about it.

Or, oh, this happened with that person over there?

You know, I don't need to know about it, but would you please tell me so that I can, you know, what you need to know about me is I'm so holy that I need to know about that so that I can pray about it.

I just want you to chase that logic down to the next step.

Because the implication there is if I don't know about it, I can't pray about it.

And if I can't pray about it, then the Lord won't know about it.

And it's very important, this is such a big deal, it's very important that the Lord knows about it.

So you had better tell me about it so I can alert the Lord to it.

That's how I can serve the church right now is knowing about those things and telling Jesus.

And so gossip becomes tolerated.

I understand this about gossip.

Gossip is generally true.

I mean, that's the hard part about gossip, is it's generally true stuff.

Some people say it's not gossip if it's true.

Well, no.

If it's not true, it's slander.

We'll get to that next.

Gossip implies that it's true.

Of course it's true.

Gossip's not lying.

It's just using your words to tear somebody down.

It's using your words to harm somebody else's reputation.

You're not the reputation keeper.

Don't use your words to harm somebody else's reputation, even if it's true.

Ephesians 4.29 is where the speech theme is first introduced.

And in Ephesians 4.29, it says your speech should be used for edification, for building up.

You know, we're building up the church.

And your speech can build up the church as it encourages brothers and sisters to maturity.

It makes the church stronger.

It makes the church a castle or a fortress to go against the world.

That's what your words can do.

But gossip erodes that.

Gossip takes out the foundation, it batters it with waves until it eventually collapses.

That's what gossip does.

When you use words to tear down, it actually ends up harming the church.

Gossip denies people grace that God desires to give them and show them through the gospel, and it harms the church.

And why do people do it?

I think so they can feel powerful or they can feel in the know, they can feel like they understand what's going on, they can feel better about themselves, they can feel vindicated.

I think sometimes it's to feel vindicated.

I know when I'm tempted to gossip, that's exactly why.

Because I want everybody to know how wrong that person was and how right I was.

I want you to know that.

It's gossip.

It's a basic Christian principle here.

You should consider yourself wronged.

This is a principle that's all over the New Testament.

And 1 Corinthians 6.

Don't sue another believer.

It's better to count yourself wronged than to sue another believer.

That's the same principle with gossip.

Don't say things wicked about another believer, because it's better for people to think you were the wronged one than to think another believer was wronged.

Gossip.

Slander.

Slander is saying something that's true about someone, but in a way that ascribes usually wrong motives.

What I mean by slander is something that's not true.

But the normal time you see slander is when you tell somebody something that somebody else did, and then you ascribe a motive that's not true to that person.

Did you hear so-and-so did this?

You know, they threw water all over me.

Probably because they don't like me.

Probably because they hate me, probably because they think they're superior to me.

I'm overlooking the fact that I was on fire at the time.

I mean that's what slander is.

It's ascribing a motive to somebody.

So-and-so did this, and that was so dumb.

It's because they don't like the church, or it's because they don't like that person, it's because they're divisive or they're argumentative or they're this or they're that.

You're ascribing a wrong motive to the person.

And that's slander.

Because that motive's probably not even true.

You don't know the person's heart.

How do you ascribe motives to somebody if you don't know their heart?

You know what's the solution?

Don't talk about other people.

It's a pretty basic solution.

Don't say things that aren't true.

Listen, the greatest commandment is to worship the Lord, to love the Lord with all your heart, soul, strength, and mind.

The second greatest commandment is to love your neighbor as yourself.

When you ascribe wrong motives to your neighbor, you are committing the second greatest sin possible.

And the Lord, of course, will judge.

The Puritans were fond of saying it's a violation of the second greatest command to make your neighbor look disfavorable.

I mean, that's huge.

When you say something that makes another Christian look disfavorable, you're sinning against that person.

It's shameful speech.

The third example I have up here is complaining.

Complaining is an example of shameful speech, of filthiness.

It's talk that is defiled, tainted by sin.

Complaining generally elevates the self above other people.

It elevates the self at the expense of others.

It's trafficking in emotions.

It's saying, I want you to feel sympathy for me, so I'm explaining my situation to you in the worst possible light so that I'm elevated.

And there's no real currency that's exchange in that except emotional manipulation.

It's a person who covets attention and is unable to get it through originality or through personality.

They'll instead get it by speech, making other people feel sorry for them, often, usually at the expense of someone else.

I'm afraid you're not thinking about me enough right now.

So here's a story about how hard my life is.

So you now have to think about me.

I'm taking residence in your thoughts.

I'm moving into your head.

And I'm using complaints to leverage my way in.

It's filthy speech.

And it tears down the church.

It's manipulative.

And it's often not even true.

Of course, I give you these three as they're separated by commas here, but you know, there's such overlap and freedom between all three of them.

They're all the same thing.

They're all shameful speech.

They're all filthiness, is the word in the ESV, but it's it's shameful.

It's ugly speech.

That's not the only example Paul gives.

He gives a second word here.

It's translated in the ESV, foolish talk, but it's the Greek word for emptiness.

It's empty speech.

It's speech that doesn't mean anything.

It's just Charlie Brown's teacher.

And you know, if you watch Charlie Brown, he just drones.

The teacher goes, oh no, no, no, no.

And that's making the point that nobody's listening.

It doesn't matter what the teacher's saying.

That's empty talk.

It doesn't have substance to it.

Talking about things that don't matter.

Arguing for arguing's sake.

I don't know if you've ever had an argument with someone, and five minutes into the argument, you forget which side you're on.

I mean, you realize that this person's arguing this and you're arguing that, but you probably are closer to their belief than the view you somehow ended up defending.

How did that happen?

Because you're an arguer.

Have nothing to do with foolish controversies, Paul tells Titus.

They only build strife, they only breed discontent.

Don't cause division in the church by arguing about things that don't matter.

And Paul gives you some examples, like don't argue about genealogies.

Genealogies are important.

They, I mean, start two with the gospels, they're significant.

And Paul says, don't argue about them.

I mean, come on.

Deal with something significant.

It's foolish talk, it's empty talk, it's gibberish.

The kind of talk where on your drive home, your wife asks you, I saw you talking to that guy for 30 minutes or so.

What did you talk about?

And you say, nothing.

Nothing?

You talked to him for 30 minutes and you talk about nothing?

Yeah, nothing important.

That's this word.

That's foolish talk.

Have nothing to do with that kind of speech.

If filthiness is wrong because it comes from a sinful mind, foolishness and emptiness is wrong because it comes from an empty mind.

The mandate is for you to use words that build people up in love.

You're supposed to use words that construct the church and strengthen the church.

And so filthy talk erodes the church, but empty words have the same, it's the same sin.

It's not using your words constructively.

You're not leveraging the opportunities you have to speak for righteousness' sake, but instead you are filling the air with words that don't matter, which consume everybody else's time.

Your speech just fills the air.

And people justify it by saying, hey, this is camaraderie.

You know, a carnal camaraderie is not a substitute for edifying speech.

The command is for you to love people by building them up through your speech.

Talking about nothing is a worldly substitute for love.

And Paul says it shouldn't be named among you.

And he gives a third category here, crude language.

ESV renders it crude joking.

It's, I mean, it's a it's a broad word that just means kind of gutter talk.

Things that are low, things that are beneath you.

Obviously, cursing.

Cussing is this example.

And you, I mean, it's language.

Every culture has words that are low, that belong in the gutter, that you can't say in nice company.

You wouldn't say in front of the king, so to speak.

You wouldn't say on TV to use an American analogy.

You wouldn't, they're words that don't belong in family programming kind of thing.

You have words, every culture has them.

And I have encountered people through the years that argue against this.

They'll say, hey, it's actually okay for Christians to cuss, because after all, words don't have any inherent value or meaning.

It's just sound waves that fill the air, you know?

What?

Words are culturally based, and you don't want to judge one culture over another culture, and so every culture has their own words, and therefore all words are okay.

Perhaps, judging by some of the chuckles and headshakes I'm seeing, you haven't heard this argument.

But believe me, people make it.

And there is, it's a pervasive argument because there is some measure of truth to it.

Words are culturally defined.

You know, they they do exist in culture and they vary between culture and culture.

In seminary, I had a South African roommate.

We would stay up at night uh playing chess with each other, and if he would make a good move, I would say a word in American English that is totally fine, and you wouldn't even blink about it, and it it would be you wouldn't even think, oh, a pastor shouldn't say that word.

It's a totally okay word to say in English.

But in South Africa, it's a no-no word.

And he had a word that he would say when I made a good move.

That again, in South African Christians is totally cool.

But Americans would not say that word amongst pastors or seminary students or no.

And so we had a little bit of a dispute about which rules are gonna.

I mean, we're in the United States, okay?

We won a war to speak our language.

And my British friend from South Africa has different connotations of those words, so we agree.

Yes, words are culturally defined.

It's fine.

But we're both gonna use words that don't offend the other person rather than leveraging it for our own freedom.

Of course, words are culturally defined.

Of course, the vocal tones and the sound waves in the air don't have a moral quality to them.

The moral quality to them is found in the heart that spoke them, not in the sound waves.

The problem is the heart that says inappropriate words.

I've had somebody tell me there's no list of words in the New Testament you're not allowed to say.

Therefore, you can say whatever you want.

Do you know that the New Testament was written before English existed?

So you're not gonna find a list of English words that you're not allowed to say in the New Testament.

Well, there's no list of Greek words.

Okay.

The principle is that every the Bible is written in a way that transcends culture.

The principle is that every culture has words that are inappropriate.

It should not be said amongst Christians.

It's not just cussing this unclean words.

Most commentators point out the most normal use of this word would be that of sarcasm.

Sarcasm that cuts down others, sarcasm that tears down others.

Now, clearly, sarcasm itself isn't wrong.

I mean, Jesus used sarcasm uh quite well and pointedly.

But certainly there is an example of sarcasm and that is at the expense of others, that is eroding other people, that is tearing them down.

People will excuse it by saying, I'm just quick-witted.

That's the problem.

I'm just quick-witted.

My intellect is too fast for y'all to keep up with.

So when I speak, yeah, of course it comes across as me cutting other people down.

That's just because I'm sharp as attack, man.

I'm on it.

As if the problem was everybody else's inability to appreciate your sense of humor.

No, the problem is you, and the problem is your heart.

It's another basic Christian principle of humility.

You are not nearly as witty as you think you are.

That's just how I am, is a poor excuse to use jokes or language that tear other people down.

And cussing works the same way.

I visited a friend in the Pentagon in the Marine Corps, and he had a really cool office in the Pentagon.

Actually, other offices kind of opened up around it, and so he had kind of an open space in the middle with kind of like a spoke system there.

And in his office, he had a big plaque over his wall.

So everybody who walked through into any of those other like six or eight offices that were around his all had to see this big plaque on the wall.

And it's just stayed in my mind ever since.

The plaque said, cursing is an attempt of a weak mind to express itself forcibly.

Let me say that one more time.

Cursing is the attempt of a weak mind to express itself forcibly.

This guy's working with a bunch of sailors, too.

It's true.

If you lack the capacity to articulately make your case or to convey how important something is, you can substitute a swear word for it, and then it comes across like you really mean it or it's really important.

It's just laziness.

And it shows that you lack substance in your heart.

And so Paul says that kind of language shouldn't be named among Christians.

And he says in verse 4, because it's out of place.

That's the language he uses, out of place.

Literally, it means it doesn't reach high enough.

You know, it means it doesn't fit in right.

Think of the lines at the roller coasters, you have to be this tall, you know, to ride this, you know, death monster roller coaster.

You have to be this tall.

And the kid doesn't quite measure up, so he can't go on the ride.

So this kind of language, this divisive gossip, slander, crude joking, cussing, it's it's language that's not fitting for Christians.

You have to be this tall to be a Christian, so to speak, and that language means you don't hit the line yet.

That kind of talk in the Bible makes us uncomfortable.

But it's what Paul uses.

It's not fitting for Christians.

It's not appropriate.

It's the ESV renders it, it's out of place.

It's out of place for people that are walking like Christ to speak that way.

It does not fit in.

You're supposed to reach up towards Christ, and that kind of language reaches down.

It doesn't represent the content of a Christ-filled heart.

Remember that all of the members of your body, all of them, are rebelling against God.

That's just your situation in life.

Your hands, your feet, your heart, your mind, your eyes, your tongue, every part of you isn't your ears, which you listen to, every part of you is an open rebellion against God.

That's how you were born into this world.

Your members are rebelling against God and His holiness.

Romans 6 uses this example.

When you come to faith in Christ, you're now subjecting your members to Christ.

So you're converted to Christ.

You place your faith in Christ.

You're now a new creation.

The old is dead, behold, the new has come.

And this new creation is subjecting your members to serve your rightful king.

They should no longer be in rebellion.

So you take your hands, which used to do whatever they wanted to do, and now you corral them and get them to be profitable for Christ.

You take your feet, which used to go wherever you wanted to go, and now you make them servants of Christ.

How beautiful it is the feet of those who bring the good news.

You make yourself evangelistically oriented.

You used to think about whatever you want to, but now you take every thought captive for Christ.

You used to look at whatever you want to, but now you use Job's language and you make a covenant with your eyes.

Used to listen to whatever is pleasing to you, but now you guard your ears.

You listen to things that are true and noble and uplifting.

And the same thing is true with your mind and with your heart and with your speech.

Your tongue is a rebel.

It wants to rebel against God, and you have to get it under control.

You don't want to tolerate rebellion on your watch.

Job lost everything.

His kids, his property, his house.

He had his wife, though, and his wife came to him and told him, curse God and die.

It's such a fascinating line to me.

He looks at her and he says, You're speaking like one of the foolish women.

I mean, she lost all her kids, too.

That's a scenario where it's like, we're gonna be the speech police.

But she said, curse God and die, and Job said, That's not that's not fitting for who we are.

That kind of language is not appropriate for who we are.

It doesn't matter what you've lost, in this moment of extreme loss, it's not appropriate.

Proverbs 15, 20, a wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish man despises his mother.

You have wisdom, your dad's proud.

If you're foolish, that same word, empty speech, gibberish, it ends up eroding your life.

It'll bring grief to your mother.

Proverbs 17, 25, a foolish son is a grief to his father and a bitterness to the mother who bore him.

You lead your life with this kind of speech, it even makes your family grieve.

It harms your own family.

Because it's not fitting for the saints.

So, what is fitting for the saints?

Well, don't just shut your mouth all the time, but open your mouth, and here's the end of verse 4.

Instead, here's what you put on.

You took off that kind of speech.

You put on, let there be thanksgiving.

Instead of those things, not those things, yes to this thing.

Thanksgiving.

You invent ways to describe gratefulness.

Instead of complaining, you describe what you're thankful for.

Instead of tearing people down, you describe what you're thankful for in other people.

Instead of grumbling, you are thankful.

Instead of sarcasm, you're praising.

And this is Paul's going to return to this later on in Ephesians 5.

Ephesians 5, 19.

Speak to one another in psalms, hymns, spiritual songs, singing.

So Paul's not just all no, no, no, here.

He's not just telling you what not to say.

Here he's saying, be thankful in your speech.

And later on in this same chapter, he'll say, Why don't you talk about spiritual things with each other?

You don't know how to talk about spiritual things?

Paul says, Sing a song with each other.

And then he says, make music to the Lord in your heart.

Paul's not, again, not concerned about the audio waves that are coming out of your mouth.

He's concerned about your heart.

So the reason inappropriate language is bad is because it reveals an inappropriate heart.

But the reason profitable and edifying and uplifting language is good is because it's making music to the Lord in your heart.

That's for some of you who can't sing very well, that's so encouraging, isn't it?

It's so encouraging.

Proverbs 15, verse 7, the lips of the wise spread knowledge.

Proverbs 15:7

Proverbs 15, 29, the prayer of the upright is God's delight.

Exodus 13, verse 9, the law of Yahweh should be in your mouth.

Exodus 13:9

Those are all just basic examples there.

Talk about God's word, Exodus 13, verse 9 says.

Exodus 13:9

Use your lips to spread knowledge, Proverbs 15 says.

The prayer of the upright is God's delight.

Hebrews 13, verse 7.

Hebrews 13:7

Through him continually offer a sacrifice of praise that is the fruit of the lips that give thanks to his name.

Peter.

If anybody in the New Testament was known for brash speech, it would be Peter.

Open mouth, then think.

That was the normal way Peter rolled.

But the ascension sobered Peter up real fast, didn't it?

Think of 1 Peter chapter 3.

1 Peter 3 · chapter mention

Don't pay back evil for evil or insult for insult.

On the contrary, give a blessing because you were called for this.

So you can inherit a blessing.

I mean, if it was Jesus who said, When your enemies persecute you, bless them.

I'd believe it.

And he did say that.

But this is Peter.

Peter, Lord, call fire down from heaven on them.

Peter.

He says, Hey, when you're persecuted, why don't you bless the person instead?

See what happens.

A few verses later, 1 Peter 3, verse 15, use your speech to be ready to give a defense for anyone who asks you a reason for the hope that's in you.

1 Peter 3:15

So you set apart the Messiah as Lord in your heart.

Even there, Peter's saying, when your Christ is sanctified in your heart, your speech will be directing other people towards him.

That's when you open your mouth.

Instead, we're so quick to open our mouth about things that just protect us.

The other day I was at a soccer game, and one of the high school players I coach asked to get something from my car.

He took a key out of my backpack and then he put it back.

He laid it on my hat or something like that.

I don't know where it went, but I go to leave, no key.

Can't find it.

Fell out of my bag, who knows?

So I go back down, I'm looking all over the soccer field for my key.

There's other parents out there, people who know me for Emmanuel.

It's an Emmanuel team.

They're all watching me look along the grass for my lost car key.

Do you know what I want to say more than anything else at that moment?

I want you all to know I did not lose this key.

I would like to officially blame the high school student that lost this key.

He's so irresponsible, that high school student.

Whereas I am so responsible, and it's important to me at this moment that you all know this.

You recognize that, keep going in that motive a little bit.

I want people to think better of me.

And in exchange, I'm willing to sell out this high school kid down the river.

You can think poorly of him, that's totally fine.

Because he's not here right now, that's totally fine.

Judge him, great, go for it, as long as you don't judge me, because I don't deserve it.

And that's what's important right now, is what I deserve.

Whereas the truth is, if you know me, you know that one of my favorite things to do is to lose my keys.

It's like a hobby of mine.

Which is why the one time when I feel like it's not my fault, it's like important that everybody knows it.

By the way, Fred, if you're listening, I need a new key to my office.

We want to open our mouths at so many inappropriate times.

William Perkins, the Puritan, said there's three times you're allowed to open your mouth to say something negative about somebody.

Three times.

You're not ready for this list.

But here it is.

First, when a judge subpoenas you and compels your testimony.

So that's what kind of list this is going to be.

You're allowed to say something negative about somebody else when you're drugged before a magistrate with a lawfully issued subpoena and the sheriff is there armed, then you can say something negative about somebody.

Number two, when privately confronting somebody else about their own sin.

And number three, if mortal harm will come to others if you remain silent.

So you can say, the building's on fire, you know, that kind of thing.

Man.

If we follow those rules, social media would be over.

And this part's for free, by the way.

You're not paying me for this next part.

This is you can stop the clock.

This is free right here.

You know, some of you sin frequently and liberally on social media.

And I don't know if you justify this idea, like if it comes from the keystrokes of my fingers, it's not technically my speech, so it's totally fine.

It's my fingers doing it.

The Bible doesn't say, you know, your fingers can't say foolish things.

But you do, and it harms you, and it harms your reputation.

And you think, you think your social media, you think your Facebook wall is like the bastion of sus, you know, society's interaction.

And if you don't stand for truth on Facebook, then who's gonna stand for truth?

So you better yell at all your friends.

You better say negative things about your political leaders or about you know people at your church or your neighbor.

You don't even know your neighbor's name, but you saw a sticker on the back of their card.

Man, they're so dumb, those neighbors.

I I don't know their name, but man, that that guy is just a fool.

And I want everybody to know about it.

You use social media to complain, and it you think you're standing for righteousness, and your friends are all muting you.

Your friends are embarrassed by it.

I'm telling you that as a friend.

Madison, my oldest, is on a new swim team, uh, a competitive swim team, and their coach, their first practice, had him out of the water, and is like, here's some important lessons for you to be a good swimmer.

I want you all to get to college as swimmers, and here's some things you need to know and live these out.

Lesson one.

Nobody ever got a college scholarship because of their Facebook account.

But lots of people have lost them.

I thought this was swim practice.

That's not just true in the swimming world either.

It's true of life.

It's true of life.

Use your words to help others, to be thankful, to spread joy, to celebrate delights in this world, not to complain, not to argue with your friends, and then thirdly, shut your mouth, open your mouth, and thirdly, save your mouth.

The consequence of all this, of course, is the fires of hell.

This is where Paul goes in verse six let no one deceive you with empty words.

Deceive you about what?

Well, about the reality of hell.

Because of these things, the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience.

We looked at verse 5 last week, but verse 5 is obviously talking about hell.

There's an inheritance that comes in the next life.

You'll lose that inheritance.

You'll be subject to the wrath of God in verse 6, the eternal wrath of God because of your sin.

The consequence for your sinful actions is the fires of hell.

You use empty words.

The consequence of your empty words is judgment from God.

And the phrase, let no one deceive you.

I mean, that's a little Greek idiom there.

It could almost be rendered, you've got to be kidding me.

When somebody says something as foolish as there's no such thing as hell, you've got to be kidding me.

Those words don't mean anything.

There is the reality of hell, and that's obvious.

And there are those that go around the world that tell people, hey, there's no such thing as hell.

And God's, maybe they won't say it like that, but they'll say it like this.

God's not going to judge your speech.

God doesn't care what you say.

You can say whatever you want to.

You're not going to be held accountant to the words that you say in secret.

They're not going to be broadcast in public.

God's not going to have a record of the things that you said in private and demand an account for every word that fell from your mouth.

That's not going to happen.

That's denying the clear teaching of Scripture.

And it extrapolates from that teaching about hell.

You know, God loves you too much.

He loves you and He knows you try as hard as you can.

He knows deep down you're really a good person.

So there's no way he would send you to hell.

You wonder how many people have been lost for an eternity in hell because people lied to them about hell's existence.

Hell certainly exists, and the wrath of God certainly exists.

And it's even on display right now.

I mean, that's the crazy thing with verse 6 is the verb tenses.

Because of these things, the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience.

Right now, the wrath of God is on display in the people who speak like that.

God's wrath is on full display.

Romans 1, verse 18, the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all manner of unrighteousness.

Romans 1:18

When you speak evilly and sinfully and wickedly, the wrath of God is on display.

And here's why.

That evil is not in the world right now.

It's in your heart.

It's confined inside of you.

There's evil in your heart, but it's not on display in the world.

Then you say wicked things about people, you slander people, or you gossip about people.

There's now new wickedness in the world.

It wasn't there a second ago, and now it's alive in the world.

And it lives on after your sound waves die out, of course.

You know, it's the toothpaste that came out.

You can't get it back in.

I mean, you've torn people down, and the words remain in their minds and in their hearts, and your words are out there.

That is a new display of God's wrath and God's judgment on the world.

God's turning you over to your own sinful desires by letting you talk.

There's the expression, you give a person enough rope, they'll hang themselves.

God gives you a tongue, and people just display the judgment of God by talking, talking, talking.

They curse people made in the likeness of God, and God will judge them.

James 3, verse 6, the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness.

James 3:6

The tongue is set among our members, setting the whole body on fire, and it itself will be set on fire by the fires of hell, James says.

Yeah, there's hell, and yeah, God will judge your tongue for it.

The tongue creates new evil.

Jesus says, Whoever calls his brother a fool will be liable to the fire of hell.

Our tongues spout more and more evil.

That is the effect of increasing evil.

That's a current manifestation of God's wrath right now.

God's eternal judgment on those who are lost is on display in the speech of people right now as they're spouting forth evil.

And of course, that evil will be harnessed and that judgment will be harnessed and poured out on them in hell.

Praise be to God that Jesus Christ bears the wrath for us.

Never spoke out of turn, never spoke sinfully.

So that our sinful speech could be imputed to him, could be given to him.

And we could be declared righteous by God.

I was reading a book about Puritan home visits.

Puritan pastors would go and visit homes, and one of them related a story about a priest that went and visited a home.

This is a Puritan telling a story about a priest that is allegedly a true story by him.

The priest, who of course would be single, was asked to go to a couple's house for marriage counseling.

And the the husband was telling the priest how awful his wife was and how difficult she was to live with, and the priest needed to come over and talk to her.

And this priest, of course, who's single, goes to the house to talk to the wife, and they walk thereafter after mass, and they get outside the door, and the husband tells the priest to wait outside.

And the priest asks why.

And as Baxter relates the story, the priest was told by the husband, I have to go inside and get her going first.

I have to rile her up.

I have to go be mean to my wife so that you can come in and see her being mean to me.

Isn't that an image of what our speech does?

It tears others down so that people will feel sorry for us.

Lord, we're grateful that you sanctify the heart.

That you transform the heart from the inside out.

James says, who can control his tongue?

No one.

We can't control our speech.

But you can through the restraining input of your Holy Spirit, through the restraining work and sanctifying work of you as the word convicts us of sin and righteousness as your spirit tells us how to live, increases our love for others.

As we walk in love, we love others more.

And so we pray that you would help us walk in love as we delight in the gospel.

We give you thanks for this in Jesus' name.

Amen.

And now for a parting word from Pastor Jesse Johnson.

Thank you for joining us today.

If you're in the Washington, D.C.

area, I would love to see you at Emmanuel Bible Church.

Our service times and church information are on our website at ibc.church.

For more information about the Master Seminary and their Washington, D.C.

location, go to tms.edu.

I hope this resource has been a blessing to you and it helps you seek the Lord daily, serve others around you, and share the gospel of Jesus Christ with boldness.

May the Lord bless you.