Chosen To Be a Help Meet - Leland Kropf

And now I'm supposed to get up here and preach. Appreciated what you said

for the Paul. I wasn't impressed with the apostle. Paul said, if

I can just comment on it, he said in Galatians was the verse that

came to my mind. For the Paul was preaching. He was trying to

set things straight and use some fairly strong language to the Galatians. There verse

chapter four, verse fourteen, he talks about his temptation that was in the

flesh, and I think that was probably the thorn in the flesh that he

refers to elsewhere. He said, you didn't despise that, you didn't reject

him, didn't reject me because of that, you received me as an angel.

And then he says, where is that blessedness that you spoke about?

And then he asked this question, Am I there for your enemy? Because

I tell you the truth? So we kind of we see a switch of

attitudes there towards the apostle Paul. And I think when there's I realized that

we as preachers need to do our part, don't we? And I've failed

in that many times probably, But I think too there's a responsibility on the

part of the listeners really what our attitude is? Are we looking for truth?

I'll tell another little incident before I move on to the message. This

goes back thirty years ago or more. Probably we did prayer meeting, and

you know, prayer meetings can be a little dull. And I don't even

remember who the leader was, what discussion he had, but I think it

was the next day somebody was a little critical, I suppose, at least

of that service. He said, well, what did you think of the

morg meeting? I thought, did I hear him right? Did he say

board meeting or no? The Morg meeting? He just thought it was pretty

dead, And yeah, it can be, but there's a sense where they're

singing of hymns. And even if there was not much commentary on the scripture,

probably if we were looking for we could have found some nugget of truth.

But I'm not absolving anyone of carelessness or neglect. But anyway, the

subject here that was assigned to me is chosen to be a help meet.

It's interesting this service here this morning Brother Dan had for the children. It

was good, and Brother Paul's message was directed a little more toward this side.

Here the preacher. So now we're going to be looking over this way

a little bit more this morning, and I think a feel for you,

Sarah and Angie probably feel a little bit singled out. And I'm not sure

how to do this this morning without you're feeling that way. But I really

think again, I trust there will be something for everyone here, especially on

the sister's side here in this message, here to be an encouragement to you.

So chosen to be a help meet. Just in the last day or

two, as I was thinking about that title, there was kind of a

new thought came to me. And I'm not sure what whoever coined this title

what they had in mind, but chosen. So who did the choosing?

Who did the choosing? And as I thought about that, I was blessed

by this. So we're going to go back to Genesis chapter two and a

kind of a general way to you, sisters, when God, after he

created Adam, formed him out of the dust of the ground, and it's

interesting there, Well we'll turn to that then. But it was God's plan.

He said, it's not good for the man to be alone, and

I will create. I'll make him a help meet. I think sometimes the

way we use that term is a little bit incomplete because we say a help

meet. Well, and I realize it's a different spelling. We're not talking

about a chunk of meat out here. We're talking about a help meet meet

for him. That's what the wife was to be. That's what e was

to be a help meet for him or suitable for him. So there's a

sense, a very real sense where you as sisters, as ladies have been

created to be a help suitable for the man. So God has chosen you

in that way. In more of a general way, Well, another way

to think about it that those of you who are married, and bring it

down I guess specifically here to to well, all of you that are married,

your husband chose you. He chose you to be a help suitable for

him. There he sends that need He desired to have you, and so

he chose you. But the thought that impressed me. Now, in a

minister's in an ordination time, the focus is primarily on this side of the

house. We have the qualifications. We went over that the other evening,

some of them anyway, and so that's the focus to ordain a minister a

preacher, as we heard this morning, that's part of his responsibility. But

as the congregation evaluated the brethren, I believe there was and we would have

touched on him briefly the other evening, there was an aspect where you,

as wives were not totally left out of that decision. I'm saying, say,

look at the brethren, the husband's the ones who were nominated, they

were also considering you as a wife. And that's what we want to look

at this morning. But the beauty of that is that there is a sense

that the congregation chose you also because they know that you are that help suitable

for him. So it was kind of a new thought that chosen to be

to help meet first God first, and then your husband would have chosen you.

And the congregation is they looked at you, considered the brother, I

believe they also considered the wife. And so we'd like to give a message

this morning that would be encouragement to you. And in a lot of ways,

some of the things that will be said here apply to all of you

as sisters, but there are more specific things also that we'd like to encourage

whoever of you, who you're whichever one of you that your husband is chosen

to the ministry that it would go with you and would be an encouragement to

you, so that your husband could be will be a blessing here to this

congregation. So back to Genesis, chapter two, verse eighteen, it says

the Lord God said, it is not good for the man that the man

should be alone. I will make him and help meet for him were suitable

for him, a help an aid. And God had formed all these other

animals, creatures, and so on, the fowls, and they came before

Adam there, and whatever Adam called them, that was the name of it.

And the conclusion of verse twenty is there. But for Adam there was

not found in help meet or suitable for him out of all that creation.

And so God stepped in to provide. I don't think it was an afterthought.

I believe it was. It was in God's plan, and what God

created was good. And so I believe that all of us as men,

all of us as husbands, realize the need for We have felt the need

for that help for us that is suitable and will help us and to fill

a place in our lives. And this morning, we'd like to look at

the biblical pattern of the wife as a help that is suitable to her minister

husband. And again it really I'm sure there'll be things said here this morning

that can be an encouragement to all of you as wives. Maybe I should

make a bit of an explanation. I think in the past and I realize

it's possible for us not to be totally balanced, but I think we've had

I personally have some of Fela maybe down on women, and I want to

assure you this morning that I'm not down on women. Truly appreciate godly women

who have found their god given place and they're a blessing, They're an inspiration,

and so I'm not down on women, and I appreciate one in particular

and love her. Glad to have her here today, been very blessed.

So I'd like to toward the end of the message will go more of a

practical practical points, but maybe some thoughts here earlier at the beginning, I

have here that you should recognize that your husband's call to the ministry is a

call from God. It's a call that has come through the church, but

it's no less a divine call. It wasn't a call. It is not

a call of his own choosing. He didn't and will not have asked for

this call, this responsibility that has come to him. And I think it's

important that you, as wives remember that this is a call from God through

the Church. He did not choose your husband did not choose it. So

don't resent it. Do not resent that he has been called to this place.

And we'll look at that a bit more, maybe some of the reasons

why you might resent that. But there's something special now. God loves us

all. He has called us to be his children, and that's special.

But to be called to be a minister is also special and should give us

confidence. I think of Jeremiah and Jeremiah won there. God told Jeremiah before

you were formed in the womb, I called you. God had a plan

and he had a plan and a work for Jeremiah. And I believe it's

the next verse there that Jeremiah said, oh Lord, God, I can't

speak, I'm just a child. But the fact was that God had a

plan for him and he had called him to a special work. God's foreknowledge

is truly wonderful. We know that God knows everything, and he knows the

future as well as he knows the past. A God in his foreknowledge saw

this day today, and he has been preparing your husband for this day,

the experiences that he's come through in life, and even as a young man,

as he looked for that help that would be suitable for him, God

was working when he asked you to be his wife. God was there.

It's all in God's plan, So he was preparing for this day. And

I just say this again to emphasize the fact that this is God's call.

This is God's plan. It's a call to do God's work. I believe

if you keep that consciousness in your mind, it will help you in the

sacrifices, the challenges you will face, the disappointments, and we talked about

some of that yesterday. I believe in the interviews. But you know,

there'll be the times when you'd like to just have an evening at home and

he comes home from work and maybe it's been one of those days. The

children are fossy, the dishwashers stop working, the drain plugged, and whatever

else might have happened, and you're looking for him to at least come and

address some of those issues and then maybe have a little bit of quiet time

together. And it doesn't work out. That way, he comes home and

maybe there's been a call from the other ministry and they need to go visit

someone. Just things that come up in the life of a minister. Just

remember it's God's call, and don't resent it. It could be that he

needs to be reminded that the drains plugged and the dishwasher don't work, but

don't do it in an adversarial way, not in a critical way. He

probably too would sooner just have relaxed evening at home. Remember it's God's call

to God's work. And what greater work is there, what greater more rewarding

with eternal rewards, What greater work could there be? Leave the other evening.

The scripture from Ephesians four was referred to there, and he gave some

apostles and some prophets, and some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers for

the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the

edifying of the Body of Christ. And that's what your husband is called to

do. Don't be better about it. It will take sacrifice. The greater

the responsibility, the greater the sacrifice, the greater the rewards. If you

could have the attitude of marry the mother of Jesus, when the Angel told

her what would be happening. And I don't think that we can probably appreciate

all the the negatives thinking of how people looked upon Mary upon Joseph. But

when this announcement, or when this message came to Mary that she would be

bringing forth a child, I doubt if she was able to absorb everything that

the angel was saying right away. But she said, behold, the handmaid

of the Lord. Be it unto me according to thy word. I don't

believe that was an easy commitment. And then you know the old man Simeon

there in the temple. I don't think he gave a lot of comfort in

that also when he said, a swords going to pierce through your own soul,

speaking of what would happen to Jesus her child. But she had that

attitude. Lord, whatever you have for me, let it be that way.

I'm just a handmaid. I'm to be used as you see best.

Next, then I'd like for you to see it as a team effort,

that you and your husband are together in this. You're chosen to be his

help suitable not only in the home, but also in the church. Your

labors together with God. God has chosen you along with your husband for this

work. I went back and looked at the marriage vows, and I've said

them many times, but there was something that stood out to me. I

suppose I noticed it before, but I was kind of looking for it as

I read first the vows that use husband's made, that you know you're to

provide and care for your wife and health and in sickness and in prosperity and

adversity. But what I was looking for and I didn't see it there,

But then I seen it in the vows that you sisters have made. It

has this phrase to share with him the joys and sorrows of life. I'm

not sure what the thought was back in that way. The husband doesn't have

to say that, but I see it. What as that you, as

a help suitable for him, are alongside him and the joys and the sorrows

of life. Somewhere along the line, I thought of this. We're not

preaching a funeral sermon here this morning, and I'd like to emphasize what I

said a bit ago that the greater the responsibility, the greater the sacrifice,

but the greater the reward, and the blessing. Keep that in mind,

so as we think of the team effort, we're not talking about what we

might see in modern churches today. I think I we got a flyer one

time for a local church and mentioned the pastor, and then the co pastor

was his wife. And that's not what we're talking about here this morning.

You have a very important part, but you're not co pastor. At least,

however you would interpret that the scriptures are clear about your place in the

church. I don't believe I'll take time at this point to turn to this

and on Timothy too. It says you're to learn in silence, and in

one Grinton's fourteen you are to keep silence. And it also says in one

of those scriptures you're not to usurp authority over the man, but rather to

be in is Now. That doesn't mean a slave and somebody of no worth.

But God has established an order from creation. And I'm not sure if

you agree with this or not, but I really believe the order of the

principle of headship preceded the fall. But I would say that I believe the

fall caused we would not have been a burden became a burden after the fall,

because simply because of the lower nature we need to deal with. And

as I was thinking about that, I believe it also the one you are

to be submitted to also has a fallen nature since the fall, and so

he's not going to do everything right. He's not always going to show the

love that he should. He might ask hard things of you, but I

believe, by the grace of God, you can still be in that place

of submission. Maybe talk about that in a bit here. But as we

think of the teamwork thing, we have the example from the scripture of Aquilla

and Priscilla, and we don't know a lot about them, but there are

some glimpses that we have that gives a beautiful picture Acts eighteen to two.

They work together in the occupation of tent making. They were both involved in

that. If you go later in the chapter, maybe I better turn to

that get this all straight, But this would be an Acts chapter eighteen.

So the first part there we have where they were they were of the same

occupation as Paul was, but it includes a quillen Priscilla in that. So

I believe they worked at making those tints together. And if you go down

to chapter twenty six. They encountered Apaulus, who was a very gifted man,

good speaker, and he was mighty in the scriptures. But a quillen

Priscilla heard him. And here he was just simply, I say just,

but he was preaching the baptism of John. He needed further enlightenment. Verse

twenty six it says that Quillon Priscilla had heard. They heard that. When

they had heard him speak, they took him unto them and expounded unto him

the way of God more perfectly. Again, we see that team approach in

Romans chapter sixteen, in a chapter of the Beautiful Salutations, in references of

Paul makes to the different disciples, he refers to Aquilla and Priscilla as my

helpers in Christ Jesus and in one Corinthian sixteen nineteen the church in their house.

So we see them in occupation. They were one in the Christian faith.

They were one. They had the church in their house. I believe

they were both involved in that, and so it's a beautiful picture of teamwork.

I don't think it means that Aquilla got out of her role as being

in subjection and not usurping authority. Over the man. But there are things

that you as sisters can do within your sphere that certainly will help out in

the life of the husband. They compliment, You can compliment the work of

your husband. And I'd like to just emphasize here that you are not somehow

lower on the latter in God's approval and in his usefulness. And Paul makes

that clear. They're in Galatians chapter three, verse twenty eight where he gives

that all inclusive verse there it's neither June nor Greek, either bond nor free,

either male nor female, all one in Christ Jesus errs together the grace

of life. Okay, how to be a help meet suitable for your minister

husband. I'm going to try to somewhat quickly read some of the scriptures.

We want this to be based on what does the Bible say, what does

yes? What is God's will and his plan? One Timothy chapter three.

I'm going to begin there verse eleven. This is speaking of the deacons wives,

but we're going to include this all here for the ordained brethren's wives.

Even so, must their wives be grave, not slanders, sober, faithful

in all things. I go back to chapter two. What have referred to

at least part of this before verse nine. In the like manner, also,

the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety, not

with broided hair, or gold or pearls, or costly ray, but which

becometh women professing godliness with good works. Let the woman learn in silence,

with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to

usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. And I'll just

point out here I'm not sure if i'll be touching on that more, but

it says I don't suffer women to teach, but that's to teach men.

And because I believe it's in Titus there we'll see that the older women are

to teach teach the younger women. So again it's recognizing that that order of

headships. I'll turn over to Titus chapter two, verses three to five.

The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviors becometh holiness, not false,

accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things, that

they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands,

to love their children, to be discreet, chased keepers at home good obedient

to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed, and

brother Paul referred to First Peter chapter three. This again would be in more

of a general way, beginning of verse one. Likewise, you wives be

in subjection to your own husbands, that if any obey not the word,

they also may without the word be won by the conversation or the lives of

the wives, while they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning,

let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of

wearing of gold or putting on of apparel, But let it be the hidden

man of the heart, and that which is not corruptible, even the ornament

of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of

great price. For after this manner, in the old time, the holy

women, also trusted in God, had adorned themselves, being in subjection under

their own husbands, even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, whose

daughters you are, as long as you do well and are not afraid with

any amazement. Likewise, ye husbands dwell with them according to knowledge, giving

honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, as being heirged together

the grace of life, that your prayers be not hindered. And the thing

that one of the things that stands out to me in that I was challenged

one time that well, the role of women really really changed in the New

Covenant. Well, I think there is an aspect to go back to the

temple worship and so on. Maybe there was, maybe there was a little

more of a difference. But the thing that impresses me here this goes clear

back to Abraham and how Sarah reverenced her husband and called him lord, and

so to me, it goes back before. It wasn't something that was just

under the old law, that that the place of women had there. We

could turn to Proverbs thirty one. I'm not going to take time to that,

but again the virtuous woman. We may refer just a bit to some

of that. But one of the things that I would like to pull out

here is kind of the overarching thought, and I believe it was in First

Timothy chapter three, verse eleven, there where it says that they're faithful in

all things. And I'd like to just now go down over some of these,

some points that I hope will be a help to you in a blessing

to you, so faithful in all things. First of all I have is

faithful in your walk with God. What an encouragement to the husband. To

the minister, husband, if he knows and observes your devotion to God,

your prayers, the time you spend in the Word, and so on.

Be faithful in maintaining your relationship with God, just giving God his rightful place

in your life, being what God wants you to be, godly character,

faithful in all things. First, Peter, there it spoke about the meet

and quiet spirit, the sight of God. That's of great price, and

it'll be a great price to the brethren and sisters in your congregation here if

they observed that meek and quiet spirit. Be submissive to your husband to his

convictions. No doubt your husband, whichever wanted is, was considered because of

his convictions. That would have given the brethren and sisters confidence to nominate him.

Be sensitive and true to his convictions. Bring yourself under that again.

They're in Titus chapter two. It says that the word of God be not

blasphemed. It's important that you give a proper example and behavior, appearance,

and so on. Be faithful in your home responsibilities. I have just two

examples. I'm going to refer to the one. We don't know her name.

Maybe we can simply see the fruit that was Noah's wife. We never

hear anything of Noah's wife other than she was to be included in those that

went into the arc. That's all that I'm aware of. The other one

is Lot's wife. Don't have her name either, but where was her heart?

Her heart was back in Sodom, not with her husband. Although he

was not the best leader, we would deduct missus. Noah was evidently right

on board with her husband training their sons, and she was on board with

him in the art. Okay, Faithful in speech. I realized there's differences

in personalities. Some are or free with their speech, gifted in their speech,

but that does not in any way excuse I'm Christian speech. Faithful in

your speech, and first Timothy there talked about not slanders, not gossiping,

not tail bearing, and the wise man thereing about the virtuous woman said she

opened her mouth with wisdom, and in her tongue is a law of kindness.

Be confident, confidential. You'll be exposed as a minister's wife to information,

but doesn't need to be should not be spread around, and so be

someone that is able to keep confidence. I like that In Proverbs thirty eleven

it says that the heart of her husband doth safely trust in her. Okay,

another area we think of faithfulness be grave, and we're not talking about

We're going to talk about grave and sober doesn't mean to be sour, but

careful, honorable, seriousness of purpose, worthy of respect. There's an aspect

of dignity, not giddy and flighty. We might use the word again.

I realize there's differences of personality. Sober would have the thought of being temperate,

self controlled, vigilant. Proverbs thirty one again talks about looketh well to

the ways of your house. I'd like to just mention again here from Titus

to it says that the word of God be not blasphemed. It doesn't feel

good if you speak out of turn, or if the congregation detects. So

you're kind of controlling your husband. You have your opinion, and it can

hamper him from be an effective minister. If you're not on the same page

and you're not in your rightful place. Okay. The last one I have

here is being encouraged in excuse me, be an encourager. You know there

are times of discouragement. Brother Paul referred to that. I think in the

interviews we talked about you're going to stand by your husband in thick and thin

and depending on We don't like to think about difficulties and strife and stress,

but it seems like most churches have them at one time or another. But

make your home your presence and encouragement. When he comes home from maybe a

stressful meeting, he wants to come home and as one ship killed me once

he's heard him say this, to come home and to realize somebody still believes

in him, somebody that the trust him. That doesn't mean to overlook something

that's wrong. Be honest, you can give positive criticism. And maybe I'll

bring this in here. Don't really have a separate point here, but you

know, we talk about covering somebody's back, and you're you as a wife,

can kind of cover your husband's back. Sometimes we're so focused on other

things we don't think about it that the shoes need to be polished. And

it was time to get the suit dry cleaned, and you know, maybe

you could use a little more hair groom on your back of your head or

something like that. Things that maybe aren't that important but can be a distraction.

My wife kindly mentioned to me the other evening, I was up here

in his suit don't fit the best, but it was kind of off to

the side. Well, I couldn't see it, and I hope it wasn't

distracting, But just I'm giving that as an example of, like we hear

sometime I've got your back, things that maybe we don't we don't think about

or anyway support him. It shouldn't be for pride. You can have aspirations

for your husband to preach well, so you know he might not be able

to preach like the apostle Paul, but be there to support him, and

you can be an encourager to him. In that way. You maybe feel

a little bit out of sight, but that doesn't mean that you're not important.

You know, a bridge or a large building or whatever, the support

that holds it up. We probably are not aware. We don't really look

for that maybe or we're not aware of it. Maybe that's the same way

in a husband's ministry. You can be that support. People may not notice,

but he knows. We have the example of Phoebian Roman sixteen says she

was a sucker of many. And I'd like to just refer to to that

woman that came to Jesus. Jesus was here on earth and she broke that

precious ointment that box and anointed Jesus. And there was criticism of that,

but Jesus said, she has done what she could. That's all really that

God requires of it, isn't it. I'm going to take the time to

read one more thing and then i'll bring this to a clothes But you know,

we have this little black book and it tells us as preachers what to

do and how to do things, and it's called the Minister's Manual. Well,

there's a section on there for the minister's wife too, And I'm just

going to slightly adapted, but the minister's wife has a very important role in

the church. She should be clothed with meekness and quietness, have a submissive

spirit, and the obedient to her husband. Her life will enhance his acceptability

and usefulness. She should be an example for all women in all things as

a rare jewel. She ornaments his work. She shall help visit, comfort,

take care of the poor, the weak, the afflicted, the needy,

as well as the orphans and widows within her biblical sphere. She shall

help her husband carry out his duties in the church. She should arrange her

schedules to accommodate his preaching, visitation, and study. She should keep the

house in such order that the family is able to accommodate guests. As she

shares with him the burden of the home, their home and the church.

She can become a wise counselor, giving him constructive criticism in supporting his work.

When he is misunderstood or not appreciated, he should continue to be.

She should continue to be an understanding and supportive companion. She must be careful

to maintain confidences that are to be kept within the ministry. She must not

be a gosper nor a busy body in other men's matters, but a keeper

at home. She should never She should, however, under her husband's direction,

edify and instruct other women, especially the younger, counseling them in their

particular needs. The minister and his wife should work together in training, disciplining,

admonishing and instructing their children. His wife should be an example in obedience

to the church standards and discipline. She should maintain a vibrant living relationship with

the Lord through personal communication with him. The Word in the Holy Spirit will

then be her constant companions. The incense of her prayer will constantly rise to

Heaven, thus blessing the home, the church, and the community. I

hope you don't feel that raising the wire too high that may have been encouragement.

I'd like to again emphasize this. The greater the responsibility, the greater

the sacrifice, the greater the blessing and reward Hebrews six' ten. For

God is not unrighteous to forget your work and labor of love ye which I

have showed toward His name, which ye have showed toward His name, and

that ye have ministered to the saints and do minister. May God bless you